Fabian was leaning as far out of The Ripper's window as he could without falling out, fully willing to put his life on the line to beat the heat that so thoroughly pervaded the automobile's interior. Sure, he was pretty tough, but at the end of the day, he was a Croconaw, and he wasn't built to endure conditions like this. "I think I'm gonna die," he croaked, the wind rushing past him still not enough to cool him down.

"I couldn't imagine," Nero said, comfortably curled up in a cozy little ball, surrounded by a circle of several battery-powered fans. He let out a content yawn and nuzzled his head up against his pillow. If Fabian didn't know anything about that Zigzagoon-shaped bundle of lies and hatred, he might've described him as adorable, but unfortunately for him, he knew better. "Before you ask me again, no, I'm afraid you can't have any of these fans."

"You don't need seven of them!" Fabian shouted.

Nero rolled over to meet Fabian's glare. The scars on his underbelly had healed up nicely, and it was difficult to notice that anything had happened there at all. "I'm so deeply sorry to tell you this, but I simply cannot afford to spare even one. I'm not lucky enough to have a body that sweats, you know."

"Lucky's not the word I'd use," Fabian thought to himself, wiping enough sweat off his brow to fill up a glass. "Toño can't sweat either, and he's fine!"

"That's because Toño is a freak of nature," Nero replied. "Human stuff, certainly. We couldn't possibly compare our situations."

"That's not how it works! He's got a normal Pachirisu body!"

The Pachirisu in question was so laser-focused on the road that he didn't really pay any attention to their squabbling. "Someone say my name?" Toño mumbled.

Rolling his eyes, Fabian marched up to Nero. "I can't handle the heat, either! I'm a Water-type!"

"Shouldn't that mean you have a resistance to heat?" Nero asked, muscles tensing up as Fabian approached.

"I'm fire-resistant, not heatproof!" What Nero was saying didn't make any sense at all. Water could put out fires, sure, but it wasn't like it couldn't evaporate. Fabian sure felt like he was going to, anyway. "Just- Give me that!" he yelled, jumping at Nero's circle of fans, hoping to snag at least one.

Without even a grunt, Nero telekinetically shoved Fabian away. "For someone with the power to see the future, you have an impressive lack of foresight. If you had thought about things for five seconds, you'd have purchased fans of your own."

"You took all my money!"

"No, you willingly gave me all of your money. It was a part of our deal." Nero lapped up a bit of red wine from a glass bowl beside him. "You really should try to be kinder to me. After all, any and all transactions you'd like to make must first go through me."

"I hate you!"

Nero drank up the rest of his wine. "The feeling is more than mutual, rest assured. Say, Sofia, you wouldn't mind getting me a refill, would you? I'll need all the alcohol I can get if I'm to converse with Fabian for another week."

Sofia, the Archen who had been nervously watching the two of them bicker from under her seat for the whole ride, jumped at the mention of her name. "I- Oh, uh- sure thing!"

"He can pour his own wine!" Fabian protested. "You don't have to do anything he says!"

"Of course she does. I'm the leader, after all."

The sheer ridiculousness of that statement made Fabian gasp. "What are you talking about? I'm the leader! The whole reason we're going on this road trip is to save my mom!"

Nero scoffed. "Give me a break. You wouldn't be able to lead your way out of a grocery store without breaking an arm or two."

"I've only ever broken my arm in a grocery store one time!" Fabian shot back. "And so what if I get hurt sometimes? At least I'm trying to help people! All you ever do is make things worse for everyone else!"

"You wound me!" he declared, his voice dripping with melodramatic shock. "All I do is act in my best interest, just the same as any intelligent person. Is pragmatism not a valuable trait in a leader? Does that truly make me a supervillain?"

Fabian felt like he was going to explode because of Nero's calm demeanor. "Yeah! It does! You ate a kid one time! That's evil!"

For a moment, Nero's smile flickered, but it was so brief that Fabian assumed he was seeing things. "A feat I'm sure you'd be utterly incapable of. Tell me, have you ever gone a week without food?" Before Fabian could answer, Nero cut him off. "Sorry, better question. Have you ever gone twelve hours without food?"

The answer to both of those questions was no. "What are you trying to say?" Fabian asked.

"Y-Y'know, we don't really need a leader," Sofia hesitantly put forward. "We're only doing this for a week-"

"Shut up!" Nero and Fabian both said at the exact same time. Whether or not they needed a leader didn't matter. This wasn't about practicality, it was about who deserved to be leader more. And even though Fabian didn't really care about being the leader himself, he absolutely wasn't going to let Nero get away with suggesting that there was anyone in the world who'd do a worse job of it than him.

Sofia crawled back under her seat.

Nero scoffed at Fabian. "If we put you in charge, you'd march us straight off a cliff by sundown in an effort to find yet more sad weirdos to adopt."

"Hey, stop being mean to them!" Fabian yelled. "Sofia's not a weirdo, and Toño's not really that sad most of the time!"

The Ripper lurched to a stop, cutting Nero off before he could make a retort. "We're out of gas," Toño announced. "Let's set up camp here. I brought four tents, just in case you all don't feel like melting away in The Ripper all night."

Fabian let out a sigh of relief. "Oh, thank Arceus!" he exclaimed, jumping out of The Ripper as fast as he could and collapsing on the ground, panting.

"I really wish I figured out how air conditioning worked," Toño lamented.

Nero gracefully leapt out of the bus and right over Fabian, and found a nice tree stump to perch himself on. "Not to be a pest, but how much longer will it be before we arrive at Renegade's Edge?"

Sofia unfurled a map, and Fabian rushed over to see it. "Well, we just made it to the Tullabar region, which means we're about a third of the way there." She traced a path along the map, ultimately leading to a location called Taro Harbor. "This is the only harbor in the world that's allowed to send ships to Renegade's Edge, so we're gonna have to pass through here."

"That's troubling to hear," Nero said.

"How come?" Fabian asked.

"Think about it. If there's only one harbor in the world that allows passage to Renegade's Edge, that means that every single person who plans to attend will have to be there too, correct? Including all three Guildmasters and dozens of Vice Guildmasters?"

Fabian never thought about it like that. "Wow, that's scary! Maybe we should try to get there as late as possible? That way we don't gotta worry about surviving for too long."

"A surprisingly reasonable idea, coming from you, but still one with flaws," Nero said. "Primarily, there's the matter of finding a ride. I can't imagine they'll allow just anyone to spectate this event, so we'll need to stow away. And if we're too late, we may end up missing our ride."

Toño laughed. "That'd be a really embarrassing way for this to end."

Sofia cleared her throat. "I… uh, I also have some stuff I need to do. At Taro Harbor, I mean. Would it be too much trouble to show up kinda early? Just a day or two, that's all I need."

"Sounds good to me," Fabian said. "Honestly, I've got no idea how to read a map, so I've pretty much gotta listen to you."

She sighed in relief and began to pitch her tent. "Thank you so much, I don't know what I'd do without you."

Fabian decided to get to work on pitching his tent, too. While grabbing one, he caught a glance of Toño refueling The Ripper using his own electricity. He violently gasped for air as blinding yellow electricity coursed from his body into the fuel tank, and Fabian felt really bad for him. "Y'know what? I think I'll pitch a tent for him, too!"

Although Fabian had never had to sleep in a tent before in his life, he just watched Sofia pitch one, so he was pretty sure he'd be able to follow her example. It couldn't have been that hard.

It took him almost an hour, but by the time he finished, he was pretty proud of his handiwork. Sure, he found it a little strange that he didn't end up needing half of the poles in the bag, but he figured that they were probably just spare parts.

Nero, who had spent the past hour surveying the surrounding land for any hint of a sign of danger, walked by and immediately burst into laughter.

"What?" Fabian demanded. "Why are you laughing?"

"Oh, nothing," Nero said. "Has anyone gathered firewood yet?"

Right on cue, Sofia passed by, carrying some wood, which she promptly dropped as soon as she saw Fabian's nightmarish tangle of poles and cloth. "That's… huh. Are you sure you don't want any help with… that?"

Fabian shook his head. "I'm all finished, actually! How does it look?"

Nero started cackling again, and Sofia gave him a look. "Please don't laugh, he's doing his best," she whispered, as if Fabian couldn't hear her.

"Did I do it wrong?" Fabian asked, his tail drooping a little bit.

Nero nodded. "Wrong doesn't even begin to describe what you've done, I'm afraid to say. Start over, I'll walk you through it."

"I don't need your help!" Fabian said, crossing his arms. "Hey, Sofia! Help me out with this, please?"

"Oh- uh, sure thing," she said, rushing over to his side.

Nero rolled his eyes and started up the fire while Sofia explained the process of setting up a tent to Fabian in vivid detail.

"Why didn't you just ask for help in the first place?" Sofia asked. "I would've helped."

Fabian shrugged. "Didn't wanna bother anyone, I guess. How come you didn't tell me I did it wrong?"

"I-" She winced. "I mean, you worked hard on it! I was just afraid of hurting your feelings, that's all."

Fabian slid the last pole through the loop, just as Sofia instructed. "Sofia, we're friends. You don't gotta be scared of me."

"Right, sorry."

Now that he did it once, Fabian was feeling more confident that he'd be able to pitch Toño's tent on his own. This time, it only took five minutes, and it looked like an actual livable space by the end.

After pulling the rain fly over the second tent, Fabian flopped onto his back, falling a bit close to the fire, but not close enough to motivate him to move. Hours passed, and Fabian did nothing but absentmindedly watch the fire burn.

Eventually, Toño slowly hobbled his way over to the fire, looking like a zombie. "Hurts…" he mumbled, collapsing onto a fallen log.

"A-Are you alright?" Sofia asked.

Toño nodded. "Just… Just not used to using that much electricity. I'll be recharged by next morning, bear with me."

Some light conversation followed for a couple hours, though Fabian tuned most of it out. By the time he felt more in a mood to socialize, the fire had just about burned out.

"Need any more wood?" Sofia asked.

Nero shook his head. "I was going to turn in for the night soon anyway. The fire is pleasant, but we're only setting ourselves up for ruin if we leave it burning all night."

"Can I ask you something?" Toño asked, looking a little less dead than before. Nero nodded, so he went on. "Why are you doing this? I know Fabian's got his mom and Sofia's got whatever she has going on in Taro Harbor, but why are you coming along?"

Nero threw the last log into the fire. "I have business at Renegade's Edge, myself. Me and my good chum Fabian agreed that we're going to help each other out, so to speak. I help him rescue his mother, he helps me set as many condemned criminals free as possible."

"I never said that," Fabian said, crossing his arms. "All we agreed is that I'll help you get there, not that I'm gonna start setting murderers loose."

"Why do you want that?" Toño asked Nero, sounding more confused than judgmental.

"Who knows? I'm an evil monster who only aims to make everyone's lives worse, so it's hard to say." Nero stared straight at the fire as he said this, the flames dancing in his soulless eyes. "We can only assume it's step one of my plan to take over the world and cannibalize as many babies as possible."

Toño smirked. "Hey, as long as Vark doesn't count as a baby, you're cool to do whatever."

"What?!" Fabian shouted. He expected this from Nero, but not Toño!

Sofia nudged him. "He's joking," she whispered.

"Oh."

"Anyways, you got a real answer to my question?" Toño asked, politely ignoring Fabian.

"Simple. I'd like to live in a world where I can do whatever I want, without even having to consider the possibility of legal consequence, and I plan to do it by acting as a thorn in the Guild's side. I suppose I'm not too unlike my father, in that regard."

Fabian shuddered. "Why would you ever want to compare yourself to him?" he asked. Out of everyone Fabian had met in his life, Claudius Moreno was by far the one he feared and loathed most. The sheer glee he saw in that Krookodile's eyes as he tried to tear Fabian's mother to shreds was etched into his mind forever, and if it wasn't for what he did, there was a real possibility that Fabian wouldn't have been forced into this situation in the first place. Even Nero didn't deserve having to endure that monster.

"I respect the man," Nero said. "He was never what I'd describe as a loving father, but I wouldn't be the man I am today if not for him. That's more than I can say for my mother, at the very least."

"All the more reason to hate him," Fabian thought. "Wait, hold on a minute. You have a mom?" Until then, Fabian never really considered that to be a possibility. To him, Nero was less of a real person who hatched from an egg, and more of a force of nature who suddenly came into existence with the sole purpose of tearing things down, similar to a natural disaster. Plus, he couldn't imagine how a woman could feel comfortable with being alone near Claudius. "What's she like? Can't be any worse than your dad, right?"

Nero yawned. "The most utterly worthless woman I've met in my life. She ran away from Father with my egg and spent the first seven years of my life polluting my impressionable young mind with the most ridiculous lies you could imagine. Sometimes, I fear that her actions will prevent me from ever becoming as intelligent as I have to potential to be. Say what you will about my father, at least he went out of his way to be a parent to me."

Fabian couldn't imagine even thinking about saying such awful things about his mom, even during his fortunately-brief edgy phase. But if he had learned anything over the past week, it was that the less he knew about Nero's past, the better. She was probably a crazy ax-murderer or something, knowing what his childhood was like. "Whatever. The fire's just about dead, isn't that your cue to run off somewhere?"

"That it is," Nero agreed. He turned tail, giving one last nod to his traveling companions. "Be seeing you! If it wouldn't inconvenience you, do try to avoid getting murdered in your sleep."

Toño raised his eyebrow. "Where's he going?" he asked, after Nero was no longer within earshot.

Not even bothering to glance in Nero's direction, Fabian shrugged. "I dunno. He likes sleeping out on his own for some reason. He's a weirdo."

"I think he said he does it because he's worried one of us will try to kill him in his sleep," Sofia offered.

Fabian spat some water at the smoldering pile, snuffing out the fire completely. "Like I said, he's a weirdo."

"If you insist, I guess," Toño said. "Honestly, I think you need to stop letting him get under your skin so easily. You're never gonna win an argument with him if your blood's boiling whenever you see him."

"What do you want from me?" Fabian asked defensively. "He's the worst! I can't help that!"

"I… uh…" Sofia murmured. "I mean, he's not all bad."

"He isn't?" Fabian asked.

She took a deep breath. "I mean, I know he's insane and a little bit evil, but- I- I dunno. He's bailed us out of pretty much every sticky situation we've ever been in, and y'know, I've seen him leave some pretty generous tips from time to time. He could be worse, I guess. Though, I haven't really met a lot of good people, so my perception's kinda screwed up."

As far as Fabian was concerned, it wouldn't matter if Nero invented the cure for cancer, nor if he tipped a waiter an entire year's worth of salary. He was a terrible person, through and through, and that wasn't changing. "The only time he ever does something nice is when he wants to get something out of someone!"

Toño shrugged. "Eh. I can't say I hate him, either. He's funny, that's for sure, and I probably would've already gone crazy by now if he didn't organize that farewell party with the Melker Motors gang for me. Then again, I don't really hate anyone. Or, at least, I don't hate anyone who's alive right now."

Fabian looked at them both like they were crazy. "He was just ranting about how he doesn't think his evil terrorist dad is a bad person five minutes ago!"

Toño stood up and headed toward his tent. "Like Sofia said, he's helpful, if nothing else. I don't even wanna think about where I'd be if he didn't get you out of that prison. At the end of the day, he's worth keeping around. Especially if protecting him means his dad isn't going to destroy the world."

"Don't remind me about that, please," Fabian groaned. It was miserable enough knowing that the lives of everyone he held close to him could end at any moment if he slipped up even once. Throwing the entire world onto that pile as well would be enough to drive him crazy.

"Sorry, my bad," Toño said.

"No worries." Fabian stood up. "Anyway, I'm going to bed. G'night, you guys."

After exchanging goodnights, all three of them headed into their respective tents. It was a bit of a tight fit for Fabian– which made sense, given that he was three times as tall as everyone else on the team– but just because he had to sit up a little didn't mean he couldn't make it work. He just had three whole days of sleep, it wasn't like he was going to die if he missed a few hours.

Nero knew full well that he wasn't going to be able to fall asleep very quickly. Any conversation with Fabian was sure to be aggravating, and he was going to need some time to de-stress. For this reason, he brought an issue of his newspaper of choice, The Morning Sun. It was around three days old, but he bought it because he got a kick out of the headline: "Villain Vanadis Slaughters Vice Guildmaster! Ferrumark In Chaos."

The article went on to extoll the virtues of the late Vice Guildmaster, placing extra emphasis on his ability to "speak his mind" and "fight for justice." Nero was absolutely going to have to show that excerpt to Toño. Aside from that, there wasn't much on the front page that Nero hadn't seen with his own eyes. The woes of being a celebrity, he supposed.

On the next page, there was an image of Fabian's new wanted poster, alongside an updated version of Nero's. Fabian had a cool hundred million Poké on his head, more than enough capital to retire on the spot, and Nero lamentably trailed behind at a mere eighty million. Most devastatingly of all, neither Fabian nor Nero had custom-painted portraits, instead having a boring listed description of their physical attributes. "I hope there's someone I can call about that."

Disheartened, Nero skimmed through the rest of the pages. There were several stories that he wasn't too interested in: water shortages in Sedolark, a minor failed riot in one of the Northern guilds by some no-name Abomasnow, something about crop yields being inadequate this season, an especially bleak story about a string of child kidnappings, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.

Only one piece of news caught his eye, and it only did so because it happened to be about the politics of Tullabar, the region he was currently in. Apparently, King Erastos of the Kingdom of Tullabar ordered that a group of protestors be executed, though the newspaper was careful to beat around the bush as much as possible with regard to what they were protesting and how they were going about it.

Nero finally reached the crossword, the only real reason he bought newspapers in the first place. Hours later, and he came very close to finally passing out, but just before his eyelids could fall down, his sixth sense warned him of something moving into his range of perception. He froze up, careful not to make a sound.

It was a Simisage, aimlessly hobbling throughout the forest whilst clutching something in his arms. A few moments of silent limping later, the Simisage collapsed. "Is that…? No, couldn't be. Must be a different Simisage."

The Simisage's heart stopped beating. Minutes passed without a single sound passing through the entire forest.

"Phew, I was worried I was going to have to move," Nero thought. With the threat seemingly neutralized on its own, Nero felt comfortable enough to allow himself to fall asleep.