Total Drama X: Winter Warriors
Episode 14: Drama on the Beach Front
Total Drama has changed.
It's no longer about idols, influencers or being gay.
It's become a series of anime battles, fought by characters and memes.
Anime characters carry anime weapons using anime gear. Cartoons enhance and deregulate a contestant's abilities.
Poop control, golf cart control, fart control, shark control, everything's monitored and kept under control.
Total Drama has changed.
The age of teenagers has become the age of big-time villains, all in the name of creating catastrophe from cartoon villains and he who controls the votes controls who stays far into the game now.
Total Drama has changed.
- Solid Snake's Ghost, Metal Gear Solid 6: Total Drama Gear
This pre-merge stuff is serious, get ready to die behind it and also, Android 21 might change for the worse startin' here.
Goodguygary: Taskmaster truly was a solid one and-damn, you think of my cast of filler? Huh, I respect you for telling me that.
Multiverse Madness truly does befit the name, by the way, go read it if you can take its edgy comedic tone and no, this is not related to a shout-out.
A very dramatic war soundtrack punctated a very serious scene in the eliminated contestants' bathrooms, where a war inside Sticks was happening.
Number 1 or number 2.
"Well, that was definitely poop."
The choices someone made inside the-
"Knock it off, this ain't no war movie. We're on the way to beating Robotnik!"
who's we-
"The whole cast, we're encroaching on the bad guys!"
oh okay.
Anyways, you could feel something in the air change because it was almost the merge and Taskmaster got himself whooped again, and again, and again by Nick Fury, probably chasing Deadpool as well.
Sticks got out from the bathroom, as Hobie was hanging on the roof and the badger joined her fellow revolutionary in special news.
"What, the underground people took over the government and changed the art of war?"
"Nope, but the revolution's finally starting to happen and also, the next challenge might be kind of crazy. I just wanted to get a good look at that stuff and rah, I'm not excited about it."
"Yeah, tell me about it, I bet it's something horrible! Like Ratigan somehow coming back for no reason at all."
Spider-Punk widened his eyes.
"That's jokes, that's jokes."
As for the actual contestants, Medic wasn't really pleased with what actually went last night despite the fact that Robotnik and Bowser were both sharing their mirth with the whole team.
Which somehow didn't make sense for the alliance, as he should be celebrating with the rest of the team on "beating the allegations" on the way, which fit with Spider-Punk.
"I don't get it." Medic answered.
"Mate, I don't get you being part of an alliance, but I do get you pulling a fascist move." Spider-Punk saw Medic stare at him. "Lying about a fake alliance to cover for your real alliance."
"Yes, it shouldn't have worked at all."
"Medic, whatever your real name is, you're having a frickin' laugh. You're basically unstoppable unless you get a crisis of morality or something like that."
"Ze move was stupid, it was ze most baffling thing."
Spider-Punk widened his eyes and then closed them in realisation, as Medic realised that he might have said way too much, but the team somehow didn't notice.
"FIRST WE BEAT TASKMASTER AND THEN WE BEAT MONOMA ON THE SAME NIGHT, NEXT WE'RE COMING FOR YOU, MK!" Joe shouted. "Yeah, that's all I got."
"Heh, that was awesome, Joe, we beat the villains." Ken was real confident.
"Yes, they're cooked like I cook my enemies!" Bowser declared.
The team looked at him weirdly.
"What the heck else are ya gonna do with fire power?"
"Cook steaks, definitely!" Ken added on, as Bowser wasn't impressed.
"Yeah, shut up, dude."
Ken was waving to Android 21, who was smiling at him, now that all that stuff was finally over and she basically waved back and he had all but one thought.
"When is this thing gonna happen, Bowser?" Ken asked. "It feels like we're getting dragged along for the ride and if I speak up, someone's gonna clobber me."
"Aw, come on, sure it could be worse but that doesn't mean I will clobber ya for loving someone. Joe might, though."
Ken and Bowser suddenly felt the stare of the quadriplegic police officer.
"Right now, you gotta tell her, okay?"
"Cool, I'm gonna do that!"
*Bowser's confessional*
He laughed.
"Look this ain't strategy, this isn't any sabotage, I just wanna see Ken and Android 21 go at it, even if it kinda hurts his chances in the game. Kinda reminds me of my relationship with Peach, minus the kidnapping."
*Confessional cut*
Ken didn't really have or need any preamble, he just jumped up to declare his love and looked towards the other team.
"Hey look, your boyfriend's gonna propose in public." Ramona poked her friend's shoulder.
"Yes."
Android 21 realised it quickly.
"Ken, this is a bad idea in concept and execution!"
The manly doll thought he was definitely Kenough for this role, as he stood up carefully.
"Yo, miss android, I heard that you were hungry for sweets or whatever it was and it looks like you controlled it pretty well. Well, I'm hungry for your love and your companionship and what can I say, you filled up this guy's plastic heart. Anyways, I like you."
And then 21 (or just Vomi, since that was her real name) tried to control it.
"Wait, did you say you have sweets to eat?" 21 asked.
"Yeah, why do ya-"
Ken then got to see a side of the android that he'd never seen before, literally turning into a whole different version of herself, having pink skin and white hair, literally wearing a black bra, white harem pants and white high heels.
Both team leaders were trying to keep their "horn" inside, as stuff just got real.
"Then you'll treat me to some good delicacies!" 21 declared.
"Uh, I didn't bring any of them." Ken was sweating.
"Ah, phooey. But I don't mind you being a personal treat of mine."
"Uh, yeah, yeah, see ya later."
Ken stepped back to his seat in pure confusion, as the Arctic Amazonians weren't really sure what to think of this information.
*Ken's confessional*
He was ridiculously concerned.
"I think she looks a little bit less hot now, but a Ken's gotta do what a Ken's gotta do."
*Joe's confessional*
"Think of my wife, think of my wife, think of my wife." He repeated, trying to not cheat on her with Android 21.
*Confessional cut*
The weird problem was that unknown to everyone, something was starting to tick within the android thanks to her transformation.
"Sorry, I just got a little too heated."
She turned back into her normal form.
"It's actually less powerful than this form, nothing easy."
Undyne was down for the count, as Ermes was shocked into being completely still.
"Congrats on that, but what the hell was that?" Ramona asked. "Does Ken even know about that?"
"No way!"
Ramona just put her face into her hands from all of the odd revelations that had just happened over the past two days.
"Seriously, why didn't you tell him?"
"Why don't you tell us about your life?"
"Because it's kinda boring, you'd kinda understand."
"Well, that's your prerogative."
Android 21 understandably looked confused at why
*Ramona's confessional*
"I don't get it, she turns pink once and then becomes a little bit of a bitch." Ramona easily spoke. "She can't seriously have this big of an ego from getting sexier once!"
*Confessional cut*
As for better moves, there was a whole lot of that happening thanks to the chicanery of Taskmaster and Monoma's elimination due to said chicanery, one of which was obvious.
"How did you get up here?" Spider-Punk asked.
"What do you mean, how did I climb up here?!" Sticks said. "Climbing trees is what I do half the time."
Spider-Punk was sitting on a branch with Sticks, looking down all over the island.
"You know a government agent's wanting to take this island because the view's surprisingly beautiful. I doubt Chris is one."
"Doesn't matter, the man's wacked out. So, a load of BS just happened two nights ago." Spider-Punk groaned. "Taskmaster dropped some hot garbage and saved his alliance."
"Yeah, that was the government agent I was talking about. At least he left the other government agent alone, probably stewing in his anger."
"Mate, I think the merge's coming pretty soon to be honest. This season's kinda wacky and I might know one of the former contestants."
Sticks looked completely confused.
"Bruh, he's in my band of not believe in consistency, AKA a real homie-"
"Ah hah, you two are up here!" Puss declared. "Behold your new partner in crime or are you two having an intimate moment on a tree branch?"
Sticks and Spider-Punk were plain disgusted, their faces screwing up at such a suggestion.
"Hey, hey, what are you all doing up here then?"
"Trying to be super discreet about dealing with Robotnik's alliance, which is real."
"What?! Of course Taskmaster was lying, Monoma hasn't left the cafeteria, nevermind done any funny business!" Puss assured. "Thanks for the milk, Spider-Punk."
"What about it, you're part of the mandem now."
Sticks and Puss looked at each other with some kind of suspicion, but they weren't exactly having many options thanks to the awkward situation.
"Just like that? Maybe the alliance life was for me."
"We're breaking down the system of alliances that somehow don't get touched at all, this isn't a true alliance. Also, you're a bounty hunter, what are you even doing here?" Sticks shouted.
"The guy gave leche and I'm not letting this team break!" Puss justified his random appearance in the counter-alliance.
*Sticks' confessional*
She looked at the camera.
"What am I supposed to do other than reference Multiverse Madness? It's way better than Multiverse of Madness, the movie where that fic stole the title from and also, Mr. Cheese is part of the government and you can't tell me anything!"
*Confessional cut*
Obligatory reference to any fic aside, the other alliance was having a little bif trouble with each other for obvious reasons.
"Hold on, why are ya against cheating now? You were on board for every other time we did, even the one where you complained!" MK shouted. "Mamizou, don't tell me you're getting moral chills."
"I said that it's beneath my standards for this game." Mamizou answered. "Not to mention, that these challenges do not get any easier even with our unearned advantage, we just know the challenge."
"I'd argue that knowing the challenge is half the battle and I'm a big fan of knowing the stuff."
"From the way you talk, I would not assume that you would know that feeling." Mamizou had a smirk on her face.
"You just sound like a jealous old timer. I could do this thing real easy!"
MK then moved towards the intern's cabins and there was a very different voice speaking about the challenges, decked in his old army uniform from the old seasons.
"Y'all can't handle a little war?! You people disgust me and I swear half of these interns keep on disappearing when I talk about war!"
Chef saw another random teenage intern disappear, leaving Ristarte, Tohru and a few others that were staying for something important.
"At least this challenge ain't dangerous for no reason and you did check the weapons' cache, ya pansies?"
"Of course, we did, that's what you pay us to do." Ristarte declared with an nervous smile.
"And I cleaned it!" Tohru piped up, as MK (with a random wig and mustache) slinked into the situation. "For clarity."
"You didn't need to do that, but I appreciate somebody that can handle at least a little weaponry." Chef called out Tohru. "Just in case you pansies get lost, y'all can find it!"
Ristarte and Tohru saluted just like MK, as the other interns split off to do their things and MK was one of them, sliding back into her own alliance with a surprised look.
Mamizou was displeased & Ermes was surprised with the simple map.
"HOLY MOLY, it's like you snatched the prison plans, this challenge's gonna be easy!" Ermes shouted. "You're done grandstanding, Miss Futa-siwa?"
"Got the thing and I didn't know it was called that. Grandstand on my butt, then!"
Ermes and MK then gave some mocking smiles towards the ultra-powerful bake-danuki girl, who was tired of the new-found mockery.
*Mamizou's confessional*
"This checks out because I never called out the dubious methods that I helped to achieve with MK's assistance. And said methods led us to a few losses, so it wasn't a consistent strategy for our victories and obviously, I have a much better strategy that involves using my abilities in an unfair manner, nothing cheap."
*Confessional cut*
And for the villainous alliance.
"Can all agree that meeting like that after Taskmaster saved us from the woes of elimination and I don't think a performance like us will save any of us from subsequently getting our games cut off?" Bowser asked. "I remember this being an alliance of fellow men."
"Well, we didn't change into women. And that is quite the agreeable method, since our chances of getting caught for cheating or even normal sabotage would be ridiculously high." Robotnik stated, laying out the newly formed strategies. "So, let's keep it casual."
"Agreed, we do have ze advantages." Medic agreed.
"And our abilities combined do make us potentially unstoppable, so forming up a strategy during a challenge should be a better idea for all of us!" Robotnik continued, starting to turn into a full on happy fella. "Medic, you could be useful, too."
"Thank you, my fellow doctor, these challenges will likely never use my strong suit." Medic grumbled.
"Before you two get yourselves into trouble-"
Bowser pointed at the door with a disquieting look after saying it, leading to Robotnik and Medic waving him goodbye.
"Well, the challenge should be starting soon, we'll be back together!"
Robotnik and Medic waved goodbye to him, as the guy went to join the barrage of dudes and these guys were still at their old stomping ground, ready to do some science work.
Medic and Robotnik were helping each other in rather unique ways, being men of robotics and medicine and these two were understandably a little tired of doing their work.
Surprisingly, it did result in something.
"That is a healing sentry, isn't it?" Robotnik was in a dour mood.
"Yes, ze sentry does some healing as well as destruction." Medic stated. "Good way to spend ze hours until the challenge!"
"Yeah, but blowing things to smithereens autonomously is my thing. You can have it, though." Robotnik could only be pleased when Medic had glee. "Right-"
There was an army horn that the duo were all too familiar with, considering their backgrounds from each respective world.
"GET TO THE BEACH AT 1000 SHARP! That's in fifteen minutes for all of you contestants!"
Surprise, Just Chef on the beach with the many remaining players and some of them were wondering one thing that was blatantly obvious aside from what the beach looked like.
In short, there were two bases on the beach that were now separated by a wooden wall with a gate that could only be opened by Chef.
"Why's Chris gone? He never-"
Chef blew a whistle in Sakura's face.
"Because he has to go to an award show and even if it was no award show, because I just want the best experience for you maggots! All of you disappoint me in some manner, wherever it's cheats or being a waste of space!"
"What about me, Chef?"
Puss got the whistle treatment.
"YOU WILL ONLY REFER TO ME AS SIR FOR THIS CHALLENGE!"
"Sir, those wars must have been incredibly traumatising, especially when the government must have sent you there for-"
Spider-Punk almost got choked out, before he got dropped by Chef.
"I've seen many people like you get sobered up by the reality of what this challenge entails, going from disrespectful fools talking crap about the government to men and women living their lives serving their country or world! But I bet none of you rookies understand what it's like to be at war!"
More than a few hands were raised, as Spider-Punk didn't want to get choked out by a reality show co-host and multi-war vet.
"DID I SAY YOU COULD ASK QUESTIONS?!"
"No, sir!" Ashido answered.
"Well, you maggots are finally starting to get it!"
Chef then pointed towards the box of weapons that were obviously not intended to be used.
"The challenge's simple! Both teams will be getting paintball guns from your bases, don't want any pansies dodging their roles and if you get shot enough times with paint, straight up covered with it, you're out of the challenge. No if, buts or funny business and the last remaining contestant standing wins immunity for their team and one of y'all will get discharged from the game through the usual."
MK was surprised at how intimidating she was by a glimpse of army Chef and for a second there, you could see that the master chef soldier was taking a look at the cheating scammer for a specific reason.
"The Amazonians get the advantage because you men disappointed me last challenge and for other reasons!"
Robotnik raised his hand, despite Chef glaring at him and after ten seconds...
...Robotnik wisely dropped it.
"Robotnik, Undyne, you two better stand proud, lest you get a penalty vote for losing the challenge!"
Robotnik and Undyne could only salute.
"Sir, yes, sir!" Undyne shouted.
"Ehehehehe, the challenge starts in ten minutes!"
THE STRIKING SNOWMEN
Joe looked at his team, who wasn't too trusting at this moment.
"Listen up, men, we may be down one powerful member and some blonde kid from Japan, but we're not gonna let that cause problems! As a police officer, I deal with aggressor-focused situations like this consistently."
"What?" Spider-Punk was baffled.
"CONSISTENTLY!"
Spider-Punk looked confused.
"Listen, man, we need a solid strategy."
"We already do. Our strongest members become the frontline to defend the rest of us, while our sneakier members do a little trickery to avoid the frontliners of the opposing team taking them out in secret." Joe explained his plan. "And the rest of us try to bait their frontliners into getting themselves eliminated and uh, I got nothing else."
Joe got a lot of weird looks.
"I'm a police officer, it's what I do. NOW DON'T QUESTION ME!"
Tengen raised his hand.
"Can I be a distraction?" Tengen asked. "I'm a real flashy ninja."
"Yeah, no, you're a ninja guy, I don't know how you'd square all of that flashy stuff with being stealthy." Joe was skeptical.
"That's why he said he will be a distraction. Hombre sprints like an eagle and jumps like a donkey!" Puss advocated for his fellow flashy fella. "And with me, they won't see us coming."
"We'll be flashy toge-" Tengen was about to start.
"Alright, shut up, you two can be the distraction. The rest of us have some work to do after losing the challenge and Taskmaster scared us men with his alliance."
Tengen and Puss just accepted that Joe was never gonna realise Taskmaster's desperate treachery.
*Joe's confessional*
"Me and Robotnik, we're both above board despite that guy being a supervillain and plus, we're men of character and friends, because I know he's got one."
*Confessional cut*
THE ARCTIC AMAZONIANS
Undyne was stepping like a military sergeant in front of the hastily constructed military base and she couldn't do it like Joe for obvious reasons, but she stepped strong.
"Listen up, ladies, we may be down more than a few members, but what we do have is the advantage, teamwork and android to beat all of the men easily! Serious question, Android 21, what are you gonna do to them?"
"Use your weapons in conjunction with my powers, what else?" Android 21 confidently answered. "Using my Majin DNA would actively hinder this team."
"Would it?" Undyne questioned, as Android 21 was a little bit nervous.
"I'm very sure of it. Me when I'm a hungry is a whole different-"
"Hold on, we get it. Maybe you just want all of us to shine and admit to taking a step back is hard! I get it, but we're a team first." Ashido cheered for the rest of the players. "No matter when the merge comes, it's not coming now and those guys definitely have a few weaksauce players that need taking down a notch or two!"
MK could only clap.
"Well, well, I'll be on that front."
*Emma's confessional*
She locked and loaded.
"Even if this doesn't feel right, at least I know it's not real." Emma said. "And it should be real fun!"
*Ashido's confessional*
"SCREW WHOEVER DECIDED THAT ELIMINATING MONOMA BASED ON A LIE WAS A GOOD IDEA AND-"
*Confessional cut*
Emma could hear the challenge not being fun from the confessional booth, Ashido letting her feelings out.
Both teams were actually carrying their team's flag like they were sovereign nations and the wall came down to a point where it was more like a hard wooden fence that only extended so far into the sea and so far out of the shore.
Chef was in the guards' tower, probably here to give some funny commentary.
"ATTENTION! Don't forget that this isn't a real war, but this challenge will make your life better for getting through it!"
"But what if it doesn't, sir?" Medic asked.
"You'll remember it at least!"
Chef blew the whistle to show that the game had been started, both teams currently in their own trenches trying to initiate their own game and he was enjoy this war game.
So far, nothing was happening like in a real war, minus something special.
"So, uh, let me tell you to make my heart tickle pink for you!" Ken threw that one out there.
"Are you gonna throw out bad pick-up lines all day for some reason?"
"Yeah."
Ken was looking through the pocket of his pink army uniform.
"I can beach you off anytime!"
Android 21 teleported away from him, as Ken got a glare from Joe.
"I don't want to make goggle eyes at your girlfriend and never say beach you off!" Joe called out. "Makes you sound weird! Also, what team are you on!"
Ken just shrunk.
"The Snowmen and it's got an awesome team name." He spoke with a hint of shame.
"Good! NOW GET TO IT!"
The dudes were cooking up plans with their normal set of weapons and the ladies were almost doing the same thing, except MK was carrying a few surprises in her jacket.
She whistled the whole team to notify of her current situation.
"That was a crap whistle." Ramona said. "MK, what do you have?"
"A few special things that could turn our game around." MK stated, opening up the zip of her red jacket.
And there were definitely a few overpowered guns that were packing artistic heat and Undyne was horrified by them.
"WHAT HAPPENED TO PLAYING HONEST!" Undyne shouted. "You can't just do that."
"Yeah, I can! Do you wanna lose the challenge because all of our butts are definitely in danger." MK said. "Taskmaster threw me in his lie for some reason."
"But that doesn't mean you're allowed to cheat and I like honest wins better. Come on, guys!" Undyne commanded. "Us ladies like to play fair."
"Wait, we do?" Ramona asked.
"Yeah, of course!"
Undyne, Ashido, Mamizou, Emma and Sticks just took their honest guns and watched as the rest of the ladies were willing to take a chance of Total Drama not caring about cheats.
Even Sakura, who was a little hesitant and Jasmine, who was definitely moreso.
"Come on, Jasmine and Sakura, you're not willing to go along with this right?" Undyne asked.
"This isn't swapping votes around so that a player gets eliminated. This is just a minor advantage to help us win." Ramona answered.
"Uh, I don't really know about that, but MK is helping us, that is for sure." Jasmine sighed, shaking her head at the bazooka. "Though I'm not sure if cheating's a good idea."
"Come on, who hasn't had a little fun by getting a sneaky one?" MK asked.
"There's better ways of having fun, like having an adventure in the desert. It's just cheating at the end of day." Jasmine advised MK.
"Okay, if you don't want to do it then that's fine, see ya when we get a win!"
Jasmine just grumbled, as Sakura begrudgingly went along with the cheater ladies with their potentially overpowered weapons and the rest of the honest shooters were sighing.
Though Sakura didn't really have any weapons.
"Well, at the very least, we should still be a united team of women." Undyne said. "And MK does now know how to use her cheats."
MK was hiding in a trench and raised a thumb up.
"That's not supposed to be a compliment, you're still a cheater. Damn, last time I was like this, I was chasing down a human and humans probably hated us and look at us women, we've got a pretty tight-knit team, so we're gonna squad up until we die!" Undyne spoke up. "Also, why are you all so quiet?"
"Frankly, the men do appear to have the numbers and power advantage." Mamizou answered. "And the self-proclaimed cheaters are in random parts of the ice-cold trench."
"That's awesome for them, but I'm going on the frontlines, Miss Futatsuiwa." Undyne shouted. "I didn't survive this long for no reason at all!"
"That is going to get you eliminated very quickly." Mamizou said.
"So, I'd rather die than let those cheaters go!" Sticks screamed. "I'm with Undyne, we're gonna undie!"
Mamizou shook her head at the terrible pun, as she smiled.
*Mamizou's confessional*
"This is what I am supposed to be doing, someone that teaches those clear villains that they are messing with forces that are much stronger than them and also, helping to provide an alliance. Cheating was my mistake."
*Confessional cut*
The cheaters and Sakura were slowly watching the wall drop, as they were stocked up with their guns and Sakura had a simple old shotgun and a smile on her face.
"The heck are you gonna do with that?" MK asked.
"Get close, get personal, throw a few Hadoukens and paint them pink!" Sakura shouted. "What about it?"
"Good on you, I'm gonna snipe some guys."
MK then cocked the bazooka, as Sakura looked at the wall.
"When do ya think it's gonna drop-"
Ermes basically saw the wall literally just slowly drop and met the dudes on the frontline with the pain guns, who weren't into one-liners and who were blasting the other guy out of the game.
"It's about to get a little hot in here." Chef warned menacingly. "Best you all don't act stupid."
Ermes was up against Medic, who only held a shield on his hand to protect his teammates.
Ramona had a paintbrush for some reason, but so did Tengen and he held two like they were nunchucks.
"It's about to get flashy."
"Yeah, don't flash it!"
Ramona and Tengen were going paintbrush-to-paintbrush, as the rest of them were giving each other some cold looks and Medic looked real interested using his shield.
Bowser had a bone to pick with Ermes for no reason.
And then there was-
"KEN, DON'T MAKE ME WIN AGAINST YOU!"
"I know, Miss 21, but I'm a man of the snowmen! Will you be my snowman?"
Android 21 just shot him with the gatling gun that blew both him and also, somehow an unaware Manolo, who was holding a gun wrong for obvious reasons.
The guys wearing a wool poncho in his dark blue colours and very pink winter clothes were already eliminated thanks to Android 21 snapping and attracting the attention of basically everyone.
MK looked surprised.
"Double kill! Ken and Manolo, get your butts out, you unworthy soldiers!"
"Man, how did we lose this fast?" Ken asked.
"Don't worry, I get it. But it's not a wise idea now."
"What do I do as a guy?"
"It's still a competition, though."
Ken and Manolo walked themselves off the battlefield, as the rest of the campers were questioning one thing.
*MK's confessional*
"Damn, she goes pink once and reveals a whole new side of her. That's a once-in-her-life change and I prolly could use her somehow, Ken's not very smart." She was thinkin' about the game. "Plus she's down for the cheats, too."
*Tengen's confessional*
"That was a stupid move with some flair! I don't know what just happened to her for her to be this way."
*Confessional cut*
The accidental double-kill from Android 21 and Bowser and Medic teaming up to give some more paint back onto her just made everyone look in awe, which somehow included Android 21.
"Also, Android 21 is out of the game. Never go wild, you get killed that way."
The android, the mariachi guy and the doll man were all sat down in the losers' bleachers, which did have heating and giant signs showing that it was indeed, bleachers of losers.
War continued on, the damn game actually quieted down and there were still a few shots flying around thanks to some mutual destruction.
"Listen, I don't know what just happened out there, but acting stupid is what got her eliminated." Ermes stated. "Time to hang back."
"Oh yeah, this is war after all. Us ladies are gonna die fast if we just rush in without a plan." MK remarked.
As for the non-cheaters, Sticks was rushing in without much of a plan with a boomerang and a paintball blaster, jumping over the trenches right into neutral ground.
"HAAAAAH!"
She even had a war cry for some reason, slipping right past Bowser, before getting a lick of the massive paintbrush that Tengen swung like a true combo, getting blown back by the weapon.
"And Sticks got herself sent to the gulag of losers. OUT!"
"Aw, come on, I finally do something for my-"
"DID I STUTTER!"
Sticks literally jumped onto the bleachers.
Two kills each, both teams were trying to think of things differently, minus Bowser and Ermes going all in on fighting each other.
"So, this is what the Inklings do all day? Nice."
Bowser rolled out of the way, as Ermes tried to get a direct shot on the big Koopa and somehow failed, the big Koopa getting ready to fire off something.
Right before Kiss punched Bowser's gun and Ermes booked it outta there, knowing that the thing was about to blow and of course, it managed to hit Bowser in the noggin.
"GOD DANG IT, it's in the eyes!"
"Bowser, you're a wuss. And eliminated."
"Dang, it's not my day today!" Bowser stomped around.
Medic was safe, of course.
*Ramona's confessional*
"Well, so much for going on the front lines." She shrugged. "Might as well do my speciality of swinging this paintbrush like a hammer away from those eliminations.
*Confessional cut*
Ramona, Ermes and MK were wisely slinking away from the front and the five eliminations that all happened in about twelve minutes.
"What the hell was that?!" Ramona shouted.
"That is a really good question. I'd never see myself to go war for some chump." Ermes stated. "But I have seen stuff like that."
"You guys are way crazier lives than me." MK remarked. "Still we're gonna hang back."
"Unless those cheaters are out, I'm not that interested..." Ermes sighed. "...but that makes sense."
The trio were hiding in a random bush in the ice-cold forest, watching whatever was going on in the pseudo-frontlines for their chance.
Ashido was what was happening on the battlefield by any measure, as she was confidently running in to support Sticks, who was doing some great work.
Mostly because Joe was in a wheelchair and still out-circling the conspiracy badger and the shots that were being shot were certainly not working out for either side.
"Sticks, lemme handle this! I've been through some rough situations!" Ashido called out
"Yeah, I got ya!" Sticks responded confidently.
Joe was shooting well with his two arms being all he needed to live hard as fast, several shots actually managing to hit Ashido of all people, the alien-like teenager flopping to the ground.
"Oh no, I am dead."
"Yeah, that's why you don't mess with Quahog's finest-"
Sticks hit him with a boomerang and managed to get a lot of shots on Joe, basically sending him out of the competition.
"Ashido, Joe Swanson, y'all ain't cut out for this challenge! Get to the losers' bleachers stat!"
Joe and Ashido looked at each other.
"That was some damn solid shooting, where the hell did you learn that?" Joe asked.
"I don't really know, but I'm a fast learner!" Ashido vaguely answered.
"Listen, you better not lie to a police officer about guns."
"There's a lot of gun heroes back in my world, just tried to copy them."
"Ah, okay."
Once they were on the bleachers, he looked suspiciously at the pink ditz.
"You know that MK's in an alliance with Taskmaster, right?"
"Wait, Sticks told us that Taskmaster's in an alliance with Bowser and the crew." Ashido answered.
"Well, Sticks is kinda crazy, that sounds like a bunch of baloney." Joe Swanson said. "Just letting you know that MK's in an alliance."
"Yeah, that makes sense."
Joe then scooted back to his teammates, who were confused with him.
"Listen, if MK goes home, then there'll be no more cheaters and maybe convincing those Amazonians will help." Joe told Ken and Manolo. "I don't really like cheaters that much!"
"Yeah, man, cheaters on reality TV are extra lame, honestly."
Manolo just scratched the back of his head.
*Manolo's confessional*
He looked deadly serious.
"I can't let this go on much longer, something about Taskmaster's admission is a lie because I've never seen Monoma not be with the team and I've only seen him and the other villains disappear out of the cafeteria for no reason." He said. "...but the team's my first priority."
*Confessional cut*
Ramona was carefully looking around the forest, as Tengen could definitely be heard, but from what direction the oxymoronic ninja was attacking, she did not know.
MK held the bazooka in a strudy fashion, Ermes' shotgun a little less so.
"Hold on, why did you stop for a few challenges? We needed that?" Ermes said.
"My conscience apparently woke up and then I nipped it in the bud." MK admitted. "Clearly that didn't work."
"Yeah, that was stupid."
"Yes it was."
The duo weren't really paying that much attention to what was above them, Tengen even dropping a little preview in their faces thanks to the smoke bombs that were dropped during their conversation.
Both eyes' flared, as Ramona had a deadly grip on her arm.
"Bowser, you disappoint me as a father! Get to the bleachers!"
Ramona was distracted by the announcement of...and so was Tengen, seemingly.
"Tanjiro said something about you being Scott's boyfriend, whatever that means!" Tengen inquired rather loudly.
"Great, you're only here to distract." Ramona groaned, rolling her eyes. "Yeah, shouted that a few episodes ago."
"Yep, gonna make this one stylish."
Tengen disappeared, as Ramona and Ermes stood strong, MK creeping out from behind the rock for a very wise reason and booking it as fast as possible, fog coming off the bombs to make approach harder.
The flashy ninja swiped at Ermes' stand, painting it blue and then took more than a few swipes right at her, Ermes getting more than a few splats of paint on her, Kiss getting a lot of paint on her.
Ramona went full on the aggression with her own paintbrush, trying to take a swing on Tengen and did manage to put on a little bit of paint on the ninja.
Which was a massive mistake, Tengen immediately capitalized on Ramona on the hit with many swipes that was the death knell for the skating girl, not helped by the paint bomb.
"Ramona, get yourself to the bleachers or else, you gonna regret it!"
Ermes wasn't getting off that easy, either.
"Alright, dumbass, show's over." Ermes remarked.
Tengen then dropped more than a few paint bombs...and also shot Ermes on the back, leading to a whole cavalcade of art materials on the prisoner.
"Ermes, go back to jail!"
Ermes just groaned.
"Screw you, you gay looking ninja!" She spat. "That wasn't even that flashy."
"It was."
Tengen then booked it.
*MK's confessional*
"So far, so good. Though I don't know if it's going to be trouble for my PR in this game, since you know, Ermes might hate me for it." She stated.
*Ermes' confessional*
"MK isn't dumb enough to fight a damn ninja, I know she's got something cooking. Doesn't mean that her leaving us to dry doesn't piss me off at all." She crossed her arms, conceding the smart move.
*Confessional cut*
Back on the main, the initial half-hour chaos led right into an understandable five-minute lull, after so many eliminations were done in such a short time on both teams.
"Unless we boot Tengen in the face, we're cooked!"
MK slipped back into the conversation.
"Alright, ladies, so what's the problem?"
"The problem is that you just joined a conversation and made a declaration, that of which, has no relevance to the current zeitgeist, not to mention, you're the only cheater still in the competition besides maybe Jasmine." Mamizou explained it loud and clear.
"Geez, you shouldn't be so hard on her. She's actually right about the ninja guy, the man just blasted Ramona and Ermes just like that!" Undyne shouted. "Alphys said that we need a speech."
"No, we don't, we just need to shoot." Jasmine said.
"Exactly. If Tengen doesn't know of our approach, we should be fine! LET'S DO THIS!"
The ladies were rather re-energized by the shout, the men having a pretty solid wall of fellows (Robotnik, Medic, Spider-Punk, Santa, Puss, Tengen & Popeye) to attack with.
"I'm going in, bruv." Spider-Punk said. "No-one's gonna stop me."
"I'm not, Senor spider guy with spikes, because I'm coming on the attack as well." Puss declared. "Sounds easy."
"It will not be a simple mission and if you think it will be so, you're going to be more paint-covered than a vending machine." Robotnik shook his head. "I'm being serious!"
Puss and Spider-Punk could only gawk at the odd comparison.
"Alright, not gonna listen to a fascist."
And the two were on, as the battle raged on again, though Tengen was there for some all-around support and the ladies were taking their positions in the trenches, Undyne right at the front.
"Best to mess with 'em." Spider-Punk advised.
"Don't worry, you're talking to two flashy guys. We never mess around!" Puss reassured the web-slinger.
Spider-Punk just saw them leap ahead, his sense immediately activated once the two of them jumped into the Amazonians' trap, Undyne throwing out her paint spear out of nowhere and then the others threw down several paint bombs and whatever else was there.
Through sheer power and a few great shots, courtesy of MK, both of them got eliminated at the same time and Jasmine also got herself stuck to a wall.
"Holy moly, Puss and Tengen embarrassed themselves. You two better git to the bleachers or else!"
Tengen and Puss slumped on the damn thing, as Spider-Punk stared right at an determined Undyne with a web and a dream of making that stuff hit, the two of them both missing their shots.
Medic had a shield and he wasn't afraid of using it, though Sakura shot a Shinku Hadouken at it and she managed to at the very least, break the shield.
"Schisse, but you never expected zhis!"
Medic pulled out nothing, but a mini-paint gun.
"Zhis was ridiculous."
Sakura blew him out of the game, just as Popeye managed to hit her in the face with his paintbrush range.
"Come on, Popeye, you can't just do that." Sakura grumbled.
"Yep, gots the girl." Popeye was snipin'.
"Also, Medic and Sakura, you're out of the game! You soldiers are getting hasty!"
*Sakura's confessional*
She looked pleased.
"You know what? I'm gonna take this small victory and push it much further into my game." Sakura said. "Plus I didn't even cheat this time around, only hard work here!"
*Confessional cut*
The boys were definitely down members (Spider-Punk was tussling with Undyne, Robotnik, Popeye and Santa were the rest.) and the ladies were arguably doing much better (Emma, Jasmine, Mamizou, Undyne and MK)
Santa then ran towards the young Emma with a genuinely nervous disposition, considering this was a kid and Emma just painted on the old guy, since he was stuck.
"You really look like a nice old man!" Emma said.
"Why, thank you, little lass!"
"Yes!"
Emma was beaming.
"Sorry for taking you down."
"It's alright, I wasn't 'bout to last much longer."
"Nick, uh, you better get your butt to the bleachers." Chef was surprisingly apprehensive.
And Santa was eliminated, what joy!
Meanwhile, Robotnik was the only guy not in the front of the game using his own gun, having a robot that was shooting for him on the field that was silently getting his butt handed to him by the tanuki lady.
"CALCULATING THE ANGLE!"
Mamizou shot a paint beam.
"I AM SO MESSED UP!"
Robotnik luckily ducked to avoid the paint beam, but that meant the top of his head was covered in paint and the wise old tanuki was in the air, ready to shoot anything down on the hubristic mad scientist.
"Wait, I can offer anything that you need!" Robotnik hastily spoke. "Anything-"
"This is a competition, not a negotiation."
Mamizou sent down the paint on Robotnik and the rest was history.
"Robotnik, you're out of the game, even if your robot somehow managed to eliminate Jasmine! Your Highness, you get the boot!" Chef told the two of them.
Jasmine was actually covered in a lot of paint and sat right down next to Robotnik.
"You deserved your loss." Jasmine said.
"Hey, it was a tactical maneuver that worked on you, which I have to clarify, was my autonomous paint-ejecting robot." Robotnik carefully skirted around the obvious answer.
It was down to Spider-Punk, Mamizou, Popeye, Undyne and MK.
You can guess what happened to Emma, since Popeye ate his spinach and shot Emma basically perfectly.
"Emma, you are out of the game! I don't know why you're in the war, man."
*Spider-Punk's confessional*
"Damn, war goes fast and that's why my man's not a big fan of war. Serving the whims of a government that would sacrifice you for some resources that you don't give a shit about and I don't know if entertainment is up there with coups and recreating dead countries."
*Confessional Cut*
Spider-Punk was easily dodging all of Undyne's very messy shots, dodging and weaving all around and finally, he managed to trip the fish lady up with a simple sweep.
Undyne actually managed to shoot the anarchist spider-man on the chest and poked him with the spear and managed to send a lot of paint his way without Spider-Punk not being able to do anything.
The fish lesbian (that's what she is) actually managed to take him down with a well-timed punch and then shot him a few times, Spider-Punk actually webbing her up and sending her a message.
Mostly in the form of sending a message.
"The cheaters are still in here, they're just lying."
"WHAT?!" Undyne shrieked.
"Spider-Punk is out! At least you didn't let your fellow soldiers down by being a pansy."
Spider-Punk stood up.
"Mate, you've been in wars that killed people because some guys wanted to get their money up." Spider-Punk said. "I respect you, but war ain't cringe."
Chef was clenching his teeth, as the bleachers were now rather populated with eliminated players.
*Undyne's confessional*
She was befuddled.
"Why would he say that? It's like he knows those cheaters are still in here."
*Confessional cut*
"It's down to the ex-cheater, a fish warrior, some uptight teen and an American patriot, a battle for the ages! Popeye, you better not disappoint me."
"I sure ain'tsk gonna let us fellas down!" He replied with a declaration. "Ya ladies are good at this time."
And he immediately started, as he had a firework gun and Undyne was on the wrong end of a quick shot, literally getting blown up in spectacular fashion with paint and everything.
"Undyne's down for the count!"
"Make our team proud, Popeye." Joe Swanson said.
"Yeah." Manolo was a little bit uneasy.
Popeye came stomping into the grounds of MK and Mamizou, who both had a simple plan that had a point of failure.
*RANDOM FLASHBACK*
Mamizou landed right next to MK, who still had plenty of ammo in that bazooka.
"So, uh, you miss me?" MK made a remark.
"Not now, for I have a most important plan. And it is quite a simple one, too." Mamizou said, as she whispered it.
For some reason, which even MK knew.
"Why did you do that?" MK asked.
"Because it was a tactical maneuver."
*FLASHBACK OVER*
Popeye saw that no-one was there and looked over the trenches, slowly movin' around the place to avoid getting hit by anything special and then there was a little something on the ground.
"Where the teapot from?"
MK and Mamizou jumped so high that it was practically a leap into the sky and with one bazooka shot, one of whatever Mamizou shot and one firework, the battle was over.
Unsurprisingly, the only safe one was not much of a surprise.
"Popeye's eliminated, a disappointment to your fellow Snowmen, go join your fellow men in having to eliminate one of your men! The Amazonians can take their victory in stride and go watch the elimination with them!"
The ladies' cheers were contrasted by the serious melancholy of the guys and the Snowmen had an important decision to make for a special elimination.
"Snowmen, all of you disappoint me."
*Ken's confessional*
He had a realization.
"Wow, I might actually be in complete danger. My girlfriend's going buck wild, not even for me, she's just going buck wild for the fun of it...and I wish I could be there with her going buck wild!"
*Confessional cut*
The dudes were not in the greatest of moods and it didn't help that there were quite a few clear candidates that befuddled the whole group.
"I heard that Popeye wasn't giving his full strength to the challenge." Robotnik said. "Listen, fella, you could've punched the paint onto that girl if you needed it."
"Blow me down, those ladies really turned their game 'round!" Popeye shouted. "They're good."
"Yeah, you could have beaten them if you exerted more force and bounced the paint off your fists, not to mention, you could have just punched the woman in the throat."
"Phooey, I'm a gentleman. Who would do such a thing?"
"Me, I'm gonna do it for the team! Popeye, man, why did you go easy on the women?" Joe asked, as Popeye looked surprised.
"What are you talking about?! He didn't go easy on them!" Manolo shouted. "He tried his best and he got ambushed."
"Manolo, man, would you have done that?"
"No, that wouldn't work-"
"See here, I don't you two getting soft on the women. Robotnik's obviously right and sorry to say this, man. You might have to go for the sake of the team." Joe said in a resigned manner.
Manolo and Popeye looked confused.
"Come on, Popeye, we can be friends outside of the competition, your elimination doesn't mean I don't like you. COME ON!"
The whole team was witnessing some S-tier manipulation in real time, as Bowser and Robotnik looked shocked at how fast the argument against Popeye was happening.
So was a good majority of the team.
*Ken's confessional*
He was deep in thought.
"Man, Robotnik has some good points. He should be punching paint towards people like it's no tomorrow!" Ken complained. "Like in those cartoons, where he might have done that!"
*Puss' confessional*
"I wouldn't believe him because he's an obvious bad guy, but Popeye is a gentleman and maybe he holds back against them. I mean, I would, but these ladies are ferocious and tough and good fighting partners!" He exclaimed. "Maybe Popeye's a little too much of a gentleman."
*Confessional cut*
The campfire raged hot.
The seats were filled.
And the snow around the campfire actually melted for once, the crunches on each players' shoes stopped, as the whole cast sat down to see-
"CHRIS?!"
Chris was dressed up like he had style, grace and a not so funny face.
"Uh, who else did you expect?" Chris announced. "Sorry, campers, I just loved getting an award and also, making you people wait for my presence!"
"I dunno, coulda waited a whole day and wouldn't have missed ya." Bowser answered.
"Glad you said it." Popeye remarked.
"Listen, man, I've gotten an award on Best Reality Show again, I'm not that interested in your words! Speaking of words, the votes tonight have been interesting and the Chef's gonna let you have it!"
Chris laughed as he was looking good in his tux.
"Chris, are you not gonna change?"
"Nope, Chef."
"Alright! Robotnik, you kinda didn't really do anything on the front lines, no-one likes a coward."
"Well, that is part of my specialty to set-up robots." Robotnik explained.
"Popeye, some of the guys think that you're too much of a gentleman to really hurt the women in the challenge."
"That'sk a low blow and this aint'sk a real war challenge." Popeye provided his perspective.
"And Medic. You were the victim of being in an alliance, but some people think you're lying."
"Well, zhat was my mistake, I deserved ze votes."
Spider-Punk and Santa both looked worried.
...
...
...
"Manolo, Ken, Joe, Bowser, Tengen, Spider-Punk and Nick, all have no votes to their names!" Chris announced. "Enjoy your marshmallow!"
The seven of them were enjoying their sweets.
...
...
...
...
"Medic, you only got two votes!"
Medic just grumbled, as he got his marshmallows.
"Popeye, Robotnik, who's gonna be booted today? Who could say, but only the votes say anything!"
...
...
...
Popeye was a real tough guy, crossing his arms confidently.
...
...
...
Robotnik, surprisingly, gritted his teeth.
...
...
...
"Actually, it's not much of a surprise, but Popeye's got the boot! He got 6 to Robotnik's 3!"
Robotnik just laughed.
"Now, that was for your general sexism!"
"What do ya mean, ya scumbag!" Popeye shouted.
These two were inching closers, as Joe got in between them.
"Listen, Robotnik, I don't think he's sexist. He's just a gentleman." Joe said.
"Well, yeah, but I would punch a woman in the throat if it was for the challenge." Robotnik explained. "I'm just a guy like that-"
"GUYS! Your Drone awaits!"
The three dudes dropped it, as Popeye just accepted his defeat.
...
...
...
The spinach sailor was walking quite sadly towards the drone and decided to let himself get picked up and he wasn't expecting Manolo to run towards him for some reason.
"Look, it ain'tsk that serious. I got myself outta dis game, just couldn't do it." Popeye wasn't even that salty.
"Honestly, Robotnik definitely proved that he was in an alliance." Manolo told him. "But I don't think getting revenge against him is a good idea."
"I woulda punched that lyin' scumbag, but Olive would be disappointed."
"Maria would disagree with that! Well, see ya later-"
Manolo got picked up by Chef and ran off the dock, as Popeye was finally picked up by the drone.
*Popeye's elimination confessional*
"Gee, this show sure was a swell one! Me game was alright, but I ain'tsk here for da cash 'cause this game has some crazy challenges, nothin' that crazy, but still da type of stuff a madman would make. These fellas were great, minus da mysterious scumbags that tried messin' with the game for no reason for da money." He was all smiles, surprisingly. "Eh, Manolo's probably gots it."
*Confessional cut*
"Well, I've gotta go back to the award show! They had some killer hors d'oeuvres back there and Popeye's gone already! If you wonder why the Amazonians were watching the guys' elimination, you better figure that out for next time on TOTAL DRAMA X: WINTER WARRIORS!"
To be continued in Episode 15, where more stuff happens involving robot animals in a robotic carnival involving a very much human Chris putting the now-merged contestants in that robotic carnival with a pace that only the Ultimate Islands cast could appreciate.
Or not, because it's the merge and some of these guys are gonna have a much harder time showcasing themselves for obvious reasons and like the old seasons, somebody's coming back.
It might be a bit too obvious of a pick, but for the record, Popeye was by far the strongest player in here, even including the stand-wielding prisoner, the beam-shooting scientist and the very very old tanuki...and yes, he is that in spinach form.
From saying dude to being a real dude, he was a man's man of a character.