Five weeks later.
Hermione's laughter rang through the potions classroom.
'Oh, Severus, you should have seen it. It was terrible. I couldn't even imagine if I had been a student like that. We really deserved every form of punishment you assigned.'
Severus smirked and replied, 'I hope that once you have controlled yourself you will be able to tell me what happened.'
Hermione took a deep breath and started to tell Snape about an incident that happened during the first year class she was helping to teach.
'This little boy, Daniel I think his name was, well- he decided that he was going to improvise with the ingredient amounts written in his textbook. We had to completely evacuate the classroom before the potion exploded-,' Snape interrupted, 'And please tell me you inquired as to why he thought himself able to improvise.'
Hermione raised an eyebrow at him, 'Well I was getting to that before you interrupted.' Snape smirked, and let the witch continue. 'I believe my exact words were 'what in the bloody hell were you thinking, boy?!' but that's beside the point. He told me that back home he was an excellent cook and that 'everything is better when the recipes are adjusted'. Don't worry, he was set straight very quickly.' Hermione laughed again.
Snape looked up from his work and at the woman, 'Ah yes. Those students who believe they know everything. I would have no idea what that is like…' He gave a soft, yet quick, chuckle, which caused Hermione to narrow her eyes at him.
'You know, you're lucky that I did know everything, or you wouldn't be here to poke fun at me for it!' She tried desperately to maintain a stern face, but lost control which resulted in the two of them laughing together.
The past five weeks had been quite a journey. Every night Hermione would finish dinner, work on her other homework for an hour, and then head to the dungeons to brew and learn about potions. There had definitely been some difficult nights, one in particular where her body modification potion modified his wardrobe instead of his actual body and he had to scramble in order to hide his naked self from her. While she had pretended that she 'didn't see anything', she lied.
That was the night her relationship with him shifted. Instead of the deep emotional attraction to him that she constantly felt tethered to, she started to acknowledge the presence of the physical attraction that had been buried beneath her emotions. Sure, they had stolen a few kisses and tender face strokes, but aside from that their physical relationship was nonexistent. At first she wondered if it was because he didn't want more, but as the weeks progressed she decided otherwise. The way he moved about her, regarded her, instructed her, helped her- it all made sense to her emotionally because they had formed a mutual friendship with one another, so it just seemed natural that he would treat her accordingly. Then she remembered that this was Snape. His emotions were supposed to be primitive, if he had any at all, and yet he made an effort to treat her more than decently. More than decently to Snape was comparable to a normal man treating a woman like a queen. His actions spoke volumes that he did want more than they had. She felt worthy, appreciated, and wanted when she was with him, and she made sure that her actions towards him made him feel the same.
Although he didn't go into specific detail, she knew of the hard childhood he had and the even harder adolescent and adult lives he led. He was used to feeling not appreciated and unwanted, and every time Hermione reminded herself of that she broke down. Not out of pity, but out of genuine sadness that a man such as him was subjected to the cruelty that constantly badgered him. She wasn't naïve to the fact that he wasn't a perfect angel either, but his actions were out of loyalty and love- not cruelty or hatred. She found herself wondering if things were ever going to progress between the two of them. She wanted it so badly, but at the same time she felt that it was too soon. It was only mid-November and while they saw each other every day for long periods of time, she didn't want to ruin anything by rushing.
She always kept her bird in the back of her mind, and contemplated about using it once or twice when she became frustrated, but never had the courage to wish for anything. She still couldn't believe that she was bonded to a dead bird, and that she had no idea what would break the bond. There were times she found herself wondering if anything happened to the person if the bond went too long without a wish or a fulfilled desire, but concluded that Snape would have alerted her to that fact. But, at this rate she would probably die still bonded to the creature!
Maybe I should make sure I'm really still bonded to the bird, Hermione thought to herself, I wouldn't mind accidentally wishing for Snape to remove some more of his clothes again… Instantly, the vision of him those few weeks back came to the forefront of her mind, and she started to blush. He didn't miss that.
'Hermione, would you mind enlightening me as to why you feel the incessant need to blush during one of our conversations?' She looked up and found him standing right in front of her, something she missed during her rambling thoughts. 'Does my presence really affect your physical being that much?' He joked with a smirk, and awaited a sharp retort.
He was completely unprepared for her actual response.
'Yes, sir- er Severus.' She replied softly.
What? Severus thought to himself. His face, usually impeccable at hiding his true feelings, revealed the fact that he was not expecting her to answer so truthfully. Severus, I do believe this night is about to take an entirely different route than planned.
'Explain.' He didn't bother with the niceties- he wanted a straightforward answer.
'I can't,' she whispered, 'at least not yet. But you do. You affect me so much more than you realize and it scares me, but it excites me at the same time.'
Severus stared at the girl, could she possibly want more than what we have already? I suppose it's not impossible...
'Hermione, do you remember the day that I allowed you to use my first name while we were together alone?' she nodded her head silently, 'Good. Now how did that make you feel?'
She looked down at her fidgeting hands, and then back up after a minute.
'Well, I guess I felt as if our relationship had finally reached the level of trust and understanding that I had worked hard to achieve. I felt as though it was a way of marking me your equal. It was very personal and special.' She struggled to find the right words to answer his question.
'Hermione, you have yet to be marked my equal, but I do agree that a level of trust has been built between the two of us that has been grounded in loyalty and mutual respect. I allowed you to do so because I wanted you to see me more personally, to use your term, and not so much professionally. Be mindful that outside of these classes I am still your superior, but superiority has no role in a personal relationship that one would seek to have.'
Hermione glanced up curiously at those last words, and feeling her Gryffindor courage build she questioned the man, 'When you say 'one', do you mean you?'
Bloody hell, she's good.
Severus wanted to shout 'of course that's what I mean you insufferable woman!' but refrained from making a spectacle, and merely nodded his head.
'I want that too,' she added, 'I want that more than you think. When I told you months ago that I was in this for a long time, I meant it. I just- er, I…'
Severus moved around the desk so he was standing next to her, 'Hermione,' he said softly, 'it would probably do us both some good if you just told me exactly what you are thinking.'
She sighed, 'I want a relationship with you. An emotional one, a spiritual one, and a-,' she stopped for another big breath, 'and a physical one.' She glanced up to search his features for any sign of rejection, but found none and took that as a sign to continue. 'I just didn't want to seem that things were being rushed or that you felt I would be taken advantage of, because that's not it at all. Severus, I want you.' He shuddered at the sound of his name and those words together.
Never in his life had he ever heard them uttered in that order, and he always assumed he never would. She wanted him. She wanted him. She wanted him. Replaying those words in his mind over and over finally made them seem real.
'Do you?' was all he could reply.
She nodded her head, 'I absolutely do. There's really no question about it. I've wanted you for much longer than I have led you to believe actually, but I never believed I could have you.'
He cocked his head, 'And why is that?'
She chuckled softly. 'Well firstly, you were a Death Eater and Harry's worst nightmare. Secondly, you were my professor who was much older than me. Thirdly, I didn't know if I was going to be able to save you,' she breathed, 'but when I did, I knew that I would have you.'
'You are an incredible person and witch, Hermione. You have so much to offer both worlds, and yet you choose to spend your time with someone like me-,' Severus began to start another one of his self-loathing rants, but was cut off by a now angry Hermione.
'Don't you dare start. Don't you dare go on about how I'm wasting my time, or that you don't deserve anything. You deserve the world, Severus. How can you possibly cast aside everything good you have done for this world? For me? You want to talk about wasting time? Ronald Weasley. That would be wasting my time, and I say that in the best way possible because he is my friend. He may be my age and my generation, but he has no idea how to know me, really truly understand me. You understand me. You know me. We're practically the same person for bloody sakes! Why would I want to spend my time doing anything other than being with someone who cares about me and shares a similar mindset? And I'm just going to guess that you care about me because I care about you.
So please, don't tell me that I deserve better or that you're not good for me. You're perfect for me. How can you not see that? You may be twenty-some odd number years older, but I've seen things- endured things that most people your age couldn't have even imagined. So, you can't use any of those excuses unless you really don't want me.' She stopped and stared him right in the eye.
'Hermione, of course I care about you. I care about you more than you think- more than I've told you, and certainly more than I should. Age is hardly an excuse, it's a reason. What do you think will happen if and when this goes public? People won't care that we're intellectually similar and they sure as hell won't care that we've both suffered emotional and physical trauma. They'll be stuck on the fact that I'm preying on a beautiful young witch because I can't find someone my own age to accept me or to care about me. And while I'm past caring about what people think about me, I care what they think about you. I wouldn't want to see this- to see us ruin your future. That would devastate me.' He gently placed both of his hands on either side of her face and stared right back into her eyes. 'But...Hermione, I want you too.'
With his returning declaration, she felt every single insecurity and worry melt away with the intensity of his glare. She also felt unable to contain her emotions for much longer, and matching his hands, placed hers on either side of his face before crushing her lips to his.
Severus felt unable to resist his attraction any longer, and enthusiastically returned her gesture with matched passion. His hands moved from her face to around her waist, allowing hers to reach behind his neck. Gently, his hands moved up and down her back as a reminder that she was safe, and she gradually opened her mouth to invite his tongue inside. That first taste was like tasting liquid sugar from the sweetest cane available: pure, soft, delicious- it was incredible and it was his. She wanted him and he would do whatever it took to keep her. His possessive thoughts were interrupted when her hands moved from around his neck to his head, where Hermione started to gently play with his hair. If her kiss was like sugar, then her touch was honey. It was slow, purposeful, and made him feel as if he could melt under the power of her fingertips. I can only imagine what pleasure this witch can bring elsewhere, he thought in the back of his mind, what a true gem. His brain, while extremely distracted, was able to comprehend that thought and he began to quell the fire that Hermione had sparked.
He wasn't a man who started something that he didn't plan on finishing, but he wasn't planning on ever ending with her. He was going to treat her like the rare stone she was, and part of that was savoring her- not rushing through everything. He slowly pulled back from her, admiring her pink and swollen lips, and gave her a quick peck.
'Hermione, you are very precious to me, remember that, and I am going to treat you as such. I, too, was afraid of rushing, but I also believe that an enjoyable pace is better than a pace that speeds through every aspect of a relationship. In time, I will fulfill every need you have and you will never have to question us. You are mine. And I do not share.'
Hermione smiled brightly, 'You're the best thing that has happened to me in a long time, Severus. I look forward to taking that time to find out more about who you are and to enjoy everything we do along the way.' She returned his peck, and then pointed a finger at him. 'I do not share as well, so don't get any ideas, mister.'
Severus grasped her finger and placed it to his lips, where he planted on it a soft kiss.
'I am a man who never searches for something when he already the best of its kind.'
He gently tugged on her arm and pulled her into a hug, an unusual gesture for him, which didn't go unnoticed by Hermione.
'Severus, I find it so odd that for someone who is not a hugger, you are the best I know.'
He gave a snort, 'You can be great at something you don't like, Hermione. Surely you've learned that by now.' After a few more moments, he broke the embrace and held her at an arm's length, 'I do believe you should return to your rooms now. We've heavily surpassed our allotted time and I don't want this affecting your other studies.'
Hermione nodded and turned to her work station where she began to pack up her bag and clear her ingredients. Once clean, she picked up her bag and turned to Severus, who had been clearing out her cauldron.
'Thank you, Severus. I'm really glad I was able to tell you this, and that you know everything now.' She walked closer to him and stood on her toes in order to place a last kiss on his cheek. She started towards the door, when she felt his hand on her arm stop her.
'Ten points from Gryffindor for an unsatisfactory goodnight kiss,' he teased before placing a more suitable kiss on her willing lips.
Smiling beautifully, Hermione's 'goodnight' pierced the dungeon silence and she walked out of the classroom.
Severus remained in the same spot for a few moments, before he finally returned to his private chambers.
He was still a little shocked from the evening that had transpired, but felt more happiness than he had ever believed possible. Things were finally going his way. He was finally going to find peace and happiness, and someone to share it with. Just as he was about to open the door to his bedroom, his floo activated.
'Please excuse the interruption, Severus, but I require a word with you at your earliest convenience tomorrow,' McGonagall's voice rang out.
'Of course,' Severus replied and watched the fire return to its normal state.
Severus' mind started to race. What could she possibly want?
Shaking his head, he proceeded into his room and settled into a much needed sleep.