Severus sat at his desk staring blankly at his empty office. He could not stay focused.
The recent conversation with Minerva about Hermione replayed in his mind without an end in sight. It seems the Ministry had already been contacting Minerva with prospective jobs for the brilliant witch to accept. Four different departments were offering her placements, and she had not even finished school yet. Who would blame them? She could probably run the Ministry and still receive O's on all of her exams. She was brilliant and everyone wanted her. Including Severus.
Oh, Severus, do not let your jealousy get the best of you.
If there was one thing Severus could not do well, it was share. He supposed it was due to his having very little as a child, so he coveted anything that was "rightfully" his. He knew it was a bad habit, and he also knew it was not going anywhere anytime soon. There was absolutely no doubt that he wanted Hermione to choose the best career path and have it be something that she loved to do, but it was unlikely that she would choose something settling. She was young. She still had a lot of life to live and a lot of places to see. She would want to see the world and travel, and those were things a relationship hindered. He refused to be that hindrance.
He thought it best that she discussed her future without his presence. He knew what effect he had on her and decision-making, and wanted to know that she was deciding for herself- not for him.
This is ridiculous, he thought, we're not even in a legitimate relationship and here I am thinking about a real future with her. He had to admit- it was hard to picture her figuring out a future while knowing he was barely in her present.
He needed her to know where he stood when it came to their relationship, but he was not going to do so until he heard her plans. His reasoning for that was the fact that he cared deeply for her well being. If she knew the truth about his feelings she would undoubtedly choose a path that was best for them and not her. He wanted her to choose the latter, and then he would easily find out the truth from Minerva.
He desperately wanted her to choose something that would keep them together, but he really had no idea what was going through her mind. It was Hermione. While steadfast on her paths, decision-making was not her strongest suit. Severus had seen that numerous times during their private lessons together. She was not indecisive, but she took her time contemplating important issues and would go back and forth between ideas.
Stop thinking, Severus. Nothing has been decided yet. You need to wait. He glanced at the clock again. Any minute Hermione would be heading to Minerva's office for their conversation, and he would have to wait until later to sneakily drag the outcome out of Minerva.
He didn't even mind that the Ministry contacted her instead of him- the actual Headmaster. In fact, he would rather leave the student "issues" up to the kindhearted and patient professor and stick with the structural matters. Besides, everyone knew how fond Minerva was of her star pupil.
Hermione was nervous. Just a few hours ago she received note that the Professor McGonagall wanted to speak to her privately about "matters of utmost importance". The first thing that had popped into her mind was Snape. Could she have found out? What would happen? Would he be fired? Would she be expelled?!
Stop it, Hermione, she mentally chided herself. There was no way that McGonagall would ever have a clue of their almost relationship.
Technically it could not really even be considered a relationship.
If they were both teenagers, she would consider this the awkward want-to-be-more-than-friends-but-not-sure-how-to-get-the-ball-rolling stage. It was almost painful at times how much she wanted more, but she had no idea how to even start that conversation. He was quiet and certainly inexperienced when it came to personal relationships, and she was his student. That was pretty much the most complicated scenario one could ever imagine.
You had the man who was afraid to be hurt, and the woman who did not want to cross any imaginary and unspoken boundaries. It was moments like these that she wished he would just perform Legilimency on her.
Hermione sighed at these unspoken thoughts and started her walk towards Professor's office. McGonagall did not use the words "urgent" or "immediately" in her note, so Hermione had to assume that the conversation would be relatively nonchalant.
She knocked lightly on her classroom door and entered, where she found McGonagall waiting patiently behind her desk. At the sight of Hermione, she stood and smiled warmly.
"Hermione, my dear, how good to see you! Please have a seat." McGonagall motioned to a comfortable chair in front of her desk. No sooner than her behind hit the cushion, McGonagall started talking.
"Now I'm sure you are quite confused as to why I have asked you to come here this morning, and I would like to quickly quell any fears that you are in some sort of trouble," visible relief spread throughout Hermione's tiny frame, "in fact, it's quite the opposite."
Hermione's interest in the conversation peaked at those words.
"The Ministry of Magic has contacted me numerous times about career options for you. Three departments have expressed interest in your commitment, and Minister himself has approved the offers."
Hermione's face was blank. How could she possibly have opportunities already? She hadn't even finished school!
"Professor," she asked, "is this because I'm a war heroine? Honestly, I don't want to be known as the girl who got a Ministry position because of her name and affiliations."
McGonagall chuckled lightly, "Hermione, you are the brightest witch that this school has seen in decades, and you think the Ministry is asking after you because of Harry Potter? Don't be silly, girl. You are brilliantly talented, and it is no crime that many people of importance have recognized that." She paused briefly before beginning again.
"However, you are still young and know how impressionable Ministry workers are when it comes to job recruitment. What do you want to do after Hogwarts?"
This question surprised Hermione. She contemplated it a few times in the 7 years of her schooling, but certainly not recently. She genuinely had no idea.
"Professor, I- I really have no idea. I love researching and discovering new ideas and formulas. I love Potions and Arithmancy and Charms, but I can't decide on one. I suppose I always thought that I'd finish an apprenticeship first before I chose an occupation."
"Well you have seemed to take a liking to Potions, and it is obvious that you have a high skill level in that area, but you would be passing up Ministry positions. The Ministry does not care for indecisive people and it is unlikely that they would reoffer. You must make sure you are taking everything into consideration before finalizing your decision."
Hermione sat quietly for a few moments.
I would have to leave Snape. I would never see him, and even if I did I'm sure that the media would catch on. There's no way the Ministry would ever approve. But I can't make this decision based on something that may or may not even be there.
Hermione was certain that she could never give up Snape. Ever. So that meant one thing- she had to choose what her heart wanted over what her mind needed.
Her mind craved knowledge and challenges, but Snape was just as challenging and knew more than the entire Ministry put together. Her decision had more to do with him, however, and less to do with his mind. She could not possibly think of being without him for even one potion lesson, let alone weeks or months. She knew her decision even before McGonagall had informed her of the offers.
Slowly, Hermione lifted her head and looked directly at her Professor.
"Professor, I'm not sure if you had some idea of what I would choose before I even walked in this door, but I assure you that I believe it is the best for me. I am graciously declining all the offers."
McGonagall, clearly shocked, gasped audibly.
"I would like to continue my apprenticeship with Professor Snape with the hopes of becoming a Potions Mistress."
"Hermione- child, are you sure?! These are huge opportunities that you are giving up. Are you sure he is what you want?"
That little slip caused McGonagall to quickly place her hand over her mouth in embarrassment. She cleared her throat and continued, "this- I mean that this is what you want?"
Hermione narrowed her eyes slightly. She knows something, doesn't she? Seeming unaffected by the outburst, Hermione replied.
"I am quite sure. I have found the subject I am most passionate about and admire Professor Snape greatly. It would be an honor to live up to his reputation some day."
McGonagall sighed, and smiled slightly.
"Of course my dear. Living up to the greatness of a man such as Severus is nothing to laugh at. He is a good wizard, and an even better man." With those words, Hermione looked into McGonagall's eyes and saw a twinkle that could have rivaled that of Dumbledore himself, "I will inform the Ministry of your decision. I'm sure you have made the right one."
Hermione took that as her dismissal.
"Thank you, Professor. I believe I have as well."
With a small smile, Hermione gathered herself and left the classroom. She paid no mind to the opportunities she was just offered, but focused on the hints that McGonagall clearly dropped throughout the conversation.
I really hope Snape hasn't said anything! He should have at least asked me first- what if more people find out? He has some serious explaining to do.
Thoughts racing through her head, Hermione strode purposefully to the Headmaster's office.