13
Ianto knew this would be hard, his mouth dry as he watched the kids, hoping for something that might tell him how things were really going. They seemed OK and as Christmas eve wound down he was struck with the way Jack was handling it.
When he settled with the book… you know the one… Ianto was shocked, as were the others. They had never seen Jack as a paternal man and it was now clear that he not only loved children, but the way he held the book out for them to see the pictures as he read 'Night Before Christmas' without even glancing once at the words also told them that he had done this many times before.
Ianto knew he had a past, after all he's hundreds of years old. Bound to have had flings… families. Ianto had not considered that. Jack had been a father before. Was a good father. As Ianto watched the kids shine up at Jack like he was an elixir it was also clear that Jack was happy in the role.
Once the kids were in their beds Ianto went back to find everyone had gone to bed as well… br Jack. "Ianto, are you OK? You went awfully quiet back there, Tiger."
"I was thinking about how well you handled things tonight. I never thought of the book, where did you even get it?" Ianto asked as he settled to pull over the scattered paper napkins to sort into a neat pile again.
Jack had noticed this, Ianto's flustered fumbling when he wanted to say something but also… didn't. Jack settled next to him and reached out to pluck a napkin off the neat pile then pace it in the middle of the table. He managed five before Ianto realized why one kept appearing there and he swung to glare at him without any power in the move at all.
"Look at you, dead on your feet" Jack said as Ianto huffed. Jack grimaced "Poor choice of words, I know. Come on. Bed. Tomorrow is Christmas ya know."
Ianto loked at Jack with such a wearily downtrodden look that Jack felt a wave of affection "Dead on your feet. Come on lover."
It was not until Jack had Ianto in the bed and was pulling the covers up that Ianto asked "Am I? Still? After everything… am I?"
"Huh?" Jack stopped moving, looking at Ianto with confusion "Are you what?"
"Your lover."
Jack knelt by the bed and placed his head on the pillow next to Ianto's "Yes. You are my lover."
"Careful Jack, a lover is someone you love and you don't do that" Ianto reached out to cup Jack's cheek "Love."
"To love is to lose" Jack agreed "But sometimes… sometimes it's worth the pain of loss to have had that pleasure in the first place."
Ianto didn't answer but leaned over to kiss him.
It was later, when he was sure the man next to him was breathing deeply and evenly …not half awake and worrying, that Jack rose once more, padding through the house to the cupboard under the stars where the extra gifts were hidden.
He placed them under the tree, saw the can of brains and little pile of crisps left for Santa, kicking himself for not remembering that part and having cookies for the kids ot leave out. Jack was never a fan of Brains so he poured the beer down the drain placing back the empty can and he ate the crips with gusto, making sure to leave crumbs before also leaving a white glove by the plate that matches the one he dropped by the fireplace. He had intended leaving them both there like they fell out of a pocket but knew this would be more exciting for them.
God, he loves Christmas.
.
.
The screaming woke them, Ianto slamming from the room and racing for the living room as Jack slapped his hand on the Webley from the side the bed and ran after him. They entered the room with Jack waving the Webley and Ianto so …. How the fuck did he get the hockey stick here?
The screamer was Owen, pointing at the gifts like a twat and Toshko was trying to calm him down as they laughed. Gwen looked like she was sucking a lemon as she muttered that she hadn't got gifts for everyone, they should have talked about gifts.
Jack had outdone himself with the gifts more than doubles from the night before and Jack knew the sure cute little flying coffee cups on a silk tie would gain him a certain look that would make him go a little gooey.
And as he had remembered from a long time ago, there was the smell of food and the open fire. Laugher, warmth and that feeling of fullness that is more than just the slap-up meal. Oh yes, Jack loved this time of year. To have a chance at it again… well… he was as excited as the kids.
"Oh Uncle Ianto… look" Mica gushed the glove from beside the plate in her hands "he liked the crisps."
"Well done. So many people leave biscuits and something salty must have been a welcome change. You know, when I drink beer I prefer crisps too." Ianto assured them, looking over at Jack with delight.
Delight.
For a while… for a sweet little while Ianto forgot his sister was gone, the lives if these little ones were exploded into the void and for a while… everything was OK.
As far as Jack was concerned, that was what was worth fighting for.