The Dragon Team was headed toward Earth inside the large Galactic Patrol carrier. The entire Cell Games nightmare was now behind them, with the only unpleasant reminders being the wounds that the Galactic Patrol healing pods were taking care of, the uncomfortable absence of the cheer and noise that Goku used to provide, and the bundle of Cell Jrs following Lapis around everywhere like little ducklings.
Not everyone recovered equally fast. Dr. Puri, Ultimate One-Nine, and Chayote required no healing at all. Piccolo only spent a minute amount of time in the pod, with his Warrior Clan Namekian regeneration assisting the medical effects of the healing pod. Bardock also required less healing than most, because part of his was still mechanical, with his cyborg parts requiring no healing, just a little tinkering that Bardock had learned how to do himself at this point.
What Bardock didn't expect, while doing a check-up on his Artificial Human parts, was hearing the mechanical door of his chamber sliding open and Dr. Puri, the woman formerly known as Ultimate No. 21, walking in. There was still no love lost between the two after Dr. Puri manipulated Bardock and his grief after the loss of his wife to work for her. That was why Bardock dropped whatever he was working on and jumped off his seat, almost ready to tackle and pummel the woman.
"Unless you got lost and ended up here, I suggest you get lost and end up somewhere else," Bardock grumbled, closing all the open plating around his wrist and preparing his fists for the arduous yet honest work of smashing people's faces.
"Hello, Bardock-san. You have every right to hate me, and I understand why you feel that way, however, I was wondering if there was something I could do to help," Dr. Puri halted in place and raised her hands in a desperate, pacifying effort. While she could fully put up a fight, her body language suggested that she wasn't going to, and, somehow, that locked Bardock up and defused him. Whatever shred of honor still rustled in the Saiyan's chest prevented him from hurting women who were either defenseless or wouldn't defend themselves against him.
This left Bardock with no options of how to deal with this annoying intruder, which only stoked his outrage further. Even though the veteran Saiyan couldn't do all the horrible things he wanted to do to this malevolent Android, Bardock hoped he could still intimidate her to get lost. With a crude grab, Bardock lifted Ultimate No. 21 off the ground and wound his fist back, giving the woman his meanest grimace.
"I said get lost!" Bardock barked out. After not seeing a lone facial muscle twitch in fear on the Android's face, Bardock sighed and put her back down, gently shoving her back and away from him and closer to the mechanical door to the quarters the Galactic Patrol gave him for the duration of their trip home. "Unfortunately for me, I know you enough to know that you've got a wide arrange of skills, but helping anyone other than yourself isn't one of 'em," the Saiyan hissed with the voice of a crushed man, still clinging to the rustling rage inside that had no outlet.
It was a strange thing to admit to oneself just half an hour after Cell's demise, but… Bardock missed Cell. There was something cathartic about an enemy you could barely hurt, who took pride in its immortality and nigh invulnerability. At least Bardock had something to punch back then. His entire life, Bardock's only known violence and intimidation, and yet now he lacked the tools to even get an annoying pit viper out of his room.
"You know, I've built most of the parts that are still augmenting your strength. I know you're not too proud of that choice, and I certainly regret manipulating you into making it, but there are advantages to this choice you've made. My research into Saiyans indicates that, at this stage of your life, you should've been showing signs of aging, dwindling stamina and strength, and periodical dulling of your Saiyan traits, however, alongside the limitless stamina that the Artificial Human technology provides, you're also still in your physical prime," Dr. Puri tilted her glasses to rest more comfortably on her nose and ears after the crude shake of Bardock's attempt at intimidating her.
"So, you came here for a medal? Sorry, I'm fresh out," Bardock walked back to his bed and slumped his bottom back down, turning his back on the Ultimate Android while he resumed his work. He was wondering if the infernal woman would see herself out if Bardock just ignored her. "Besides, I've had Bulma update and replace most of your junk, so if anyone's deserving of a medal…"
"I see…" Dr. Puri scratched her elbow in a rare moment of weakness. Whether it be feigned or real, Bardock had never seen Dr. Puri show weakness like this. She wasn't someone who would even pretend to be vulnerable in front of her enemies. Even when she was posing as an aspiring researcher under Bulma's employ, she still had that smugness and aura of superiority about her…
"Is your ass itching or something?" Bardock threw his tools and scrap away and turned around, glaring at the tormented Ultimate Android. "If it is, sitting it down does wonders."
"I…" Ultimate No. 21 said, looking like she was questioning how to even begin explaining herself. "I'm sorry if I upset you right now. It's just… My entire life's work has just gone up in flames. Just when I thought I got my family back, I lost it again with a monster a different version of me made using my body to kill my son. I just… I don't…"
"So, you got broken, and you came to me? I'm no big hero and I ain't givin' you a pep speech, lady," Bardock replied, sighing after realizing that just ignoring this fiend wouldn't work. It might work for her, it might get her to fuck off and annoy someone else, but it won't work for Bardock and the consciousness that Gine always saw in him and nurtured into blossoming into a part of who Bardock was. "If you want that, go talk to Gohan. He was ready to spare Cell, and that asshole led to his father and my son getting killed. He'll tell you what you want to hear."
"But… Perhaps… What I want to hear is the last thing I need right now?" Dr. Puri pressed her hand to her face. "Ultimate One-Nine… My only remaining child… She's obsessed with that boy now, ever since he saved her and prevented Cell from absorbing No. 16's parts. She's dead set on staying on Earth, and… I can't… I can't do that. I'm… I'm going to lose my family all over again!"
Bardock stretched his face in equal part befuddlement and disgust at the situation he ended up in when Dr. Puri plunged her face into the comfort of her hands and began weeping uncontrollably. The woman must've regretted coming back to her senses from being turned into a doll. Given the circumstances, she'd have much rather seen herself being crushed as a doll than returned to human form. Frankly, Bardock may have preferred that outcome too, but…
She was weeping in his damn room!
"Look, if you wanna throw another apocalyptic fit and try to take over the world 'cause your family's either dead or wants nothin' to do with you, be my guest and make my day by giving me an excuse to scratch the itch of my fists on your face," Bardock stood up, speaking in a much softer tone than the content of his words implied. "But the thing is… Everyone's lost something. Gohan lost his father, I lost my son and I lost my wife years ago. You want to know the dumbest thing? I'm pissed at that idiot Kakarot for doing something as stupid and heroic as merging with the Dragon Balls for something like that dumb space rock and its atmosphere or whatever… 'Cause now I don't got my son and wife anymore, and not even the Dragon Balls can fix that. You want to know the most twisted thing? Launch, a woman on Earth, has been waiting for years to be split apart from her other self and living a nightmarish life, being unable to start relationships or make significant changes in her life, because every time she tries–she becomes another person who just tries living their own life. And yet… She's moving on. And she'll have to keep moving on because there're no more Dragon Balls to fix anyone's problems for them. So you can sit in the corner there and blow your heart out whining, be my guest, or you can build yourself a new family and Android army, who'll kiss your ass every step of the way and do as they're told, I don't even care anymore. Just don't pretend like you've got it so much worse than everyone else."
"You… You care a lot about that woman, don't you?" Dr. Puri showed her swollen and tearful face from the comfort of her hands, sniffing a few times.
"Launch?" Bardock winced with the left side of his face, unsure how to take this question. "You're damn right I do. Because part of her reminds me of my sweet Gine, and I empathize with both of them being stuck and unable to start a life of their own. The Other Launch even saw her beloved die before even getting a shot at starting a life with him. I've tried over and over and over again to do something, to help her, but… It's just not something you can swing a fist at, and it pisses me off!"
"For what it is worth, Bardock-san…" Dr. Puri said in a lukewarm tone that was equal part sweet and sorrowful. "While poor Launch-san's circumstances are certainly unfortunate, she's actually incredibly lucky to have a friend like you in her life. While I admit I do not know what it's like to live her life, I am jealous of the bonds both Launches have forged."
"A little of not backstabbing people and not trying to take over the world and kill everyone goes a long way, doesn't it?" Bardock crossed his arms and turned his glare away from the hated woman who manipulated him into fighting his son while dealing with his grief over his dead wife.
"Maybe you're right…" Dr. Puri looked down and away. "I know you hate me a lot, Bardock-san, and, as I've already said–I understand why I don't blame you for it, but… If it's any consolation for the ill will that's in your heart, I think this conversation of ours has helped me a great deal."
"Well, ain't that a strawberry sundae…" Bardock sat down on his bed and concealed his frustrated face behind the weaved fingers of his hands.
"Before coming here, I was unsure about what to do, but… I think I want to make an active effort to help," Dr. Puri declared.
"A little too late for that now, don't you think?" Bardock peeked through his right side at the Ultimate Android.
"Perhaps, but please have in mind that Android 21 has ruined both of our lives and families, Bardock-san," Dr. Puri said, wrapping her arms together under her chest and gently swaying her body to both sides. "I don't believe that anyone either of us knows has had the worst aspects of their self come back from the future to dismantle every element of one's life and drag everything they know or hold dear through the mud. That kind of thing happening puts things into perspective. Therefore, I'll do my utmost best to help people and mend people's lives from this point on. And I'm starting with Launch-san."
"What was that?" Bardock stood back up, turning to Android 21, almost as if he hadn't heard her the first time.
"That's right, I'll plead so that Bulma-san to allow me to work with her on Earth again. After all, I've got no home or laboratory or any technology to call my own. I want to build a machine that will separate the two Launch-san's into their own bodies, allowing them to live their separate lives and experience happiness and joy that lasts for the rest of their lives, as opposed to just until the next switch," Dr. Puri declared, boldly clenching her fist and pressing it to her chest, almost as if swearing it to Bardock.
"You…" Bardock muttered, staring at the Ultimate Android with wide eyes and an open mouth before the mechanical door slid open once more and Krillin rushed in, accompanied by Jaco and Lazuli.
"Oh, you two are here…" Krillin said before freezing up as it only just occurred to him what scene he might have walked into. "Umm…"
"Relax, shrimp," Bardock composed himself and turned away from all the intruders in his room. "We're just chatting a bit, that's all."
"I… I see…" Krillin sighed easier. "W-Well… We came here to tell you that Yamcha's woken up and left the medical pod. He's gonna take the Ultimate Dragon Balls to Earth when the carrier gets a little closer and he can sense some Ki from down there better. We're gonna make it after all!"
"Well, that's good, 'cause it's not like we've got the Dragon Balls to stitch the Earth back together if it blows up, do we?" Bardock grumbled before longingly looking away through the porthole and into the careless black oblivion of space.
"If it's okay, the Galactic King would like to award all of you and make your deputization into the Galactic Patrol official," Jaco pointed out, extending to Bardock a version of the Galactic Patrol uniform that was exactly his size. Reacting to this with a cheerful chuckle, Krillin patted himself down, wearing the exact, aptly sized copy of that uniform himself after the heated bout with Cell left his spaceman suit and dogi tattered.
"Heh, this looks lame and goofy, but it feels stretchy and durable, like those Saiyan armors…" Krillin moved and stretched around, looking gleeful like a child holding a new toy in his hands for the first time.
"Heh, my shorty intergalactic superhero," Lazuli smiled, pressing her hands to her waist before wrapping up her husband's bald head into a hold and scratching it with her knuckles as a tease.
"Alright, alright, I'll change. Give me some privacy, will ya?" Bardock grumbled, approaching the Galactic Patrolman and snagging the costume from his hands.
"Actually, you don't need to change manually, you can just use…" Jaco was about to explain something before Bardock pretty much grabbed him and flung him head-first out of his room. Seeing the less-than-subtle exit of the Galactic Patrolman, Krillin, Lazuli, and Dr. Puri all left Bardock's room of their own volition.
"For your heroism and kindness in protecting the innocents and upholding the public trust, also for your bravery in defeating the terrifying monster Cell, the Galactic Patrol thanks all of you!" the Galactic King, a mint-green octopus with a massive head and many tentacles, donning a large golden crown with the Galactic Patrol insignia on it, congratulated the kneeling Dragon Team, dressed in the Galactic Patrol uniforms. "For your exceptional courage and professionalism in the field, worthy of the name of the elite intergalactic warrior, I grant you all the rank of deputized Galactic Patrol members, patrolling in the Milky Way sector of the North Galaxy!"
"Wait, this isn't like an actual job, is it?" Krillin shared a confused look between the rest of the group, whispering so that the Galactic King didn't get offended. "Because Lazuli and I have already got a job."
"Wait, hear the cosmoctopus out, let's hear what it'll be paying us…" Lazuli shushed her husband into silence.
"For the exemplary fulfillment of your duties in dealing with the intergalactic terrorist known as Cell during the Cell Games incident, I, the Galactic King, beseech to you all the official Galactic Patrol binder!" the Galactic King proudly proclaimed, sticking its gooey green tentacle to a purple binder with silver framing and showcasing it before a large group of patrolmen, all of whom clapped in reverence and cheered for their newest deputized members.
"W-Wait, seriously?" Yamcha squinted. "Ugh… Weird alien police, this goofy uniform, now this… Tell me I didn't actually die and go to the Otherworld already."
"Thank you, Your Majesty!" Gohan bowed before receiving the gooey Galactic Patrol binder from the Galactic King's tentacles as if he were taking a katana from the shogun's hands.
"Wait, does everyone's binder have ecchi pictures of this geezer in it?" Lapis muttered to himself while Lazuli flat-out tossed hers over her shoulder after the Galactic King moved on to her brother, infuriating a whole bunch of Galactic Patrolmen who observed the ceremony from behind her.
"Ah! I apologize!" the Galactic King became flustered, throwing his tentacles around and squirting ooze and sticky and glue from all over his body, like a slug. "I must have forgotten to remove my holiday pictures before giving this one away!"
"It's okay, you can have mine…" Piccolo handed Lapis his own with a look of grave, second-hand embarrassment, and a twitching left eye.
"Alright, I got it!" Yamcha exclaimed cheerfully after opening his eyes and pumping his fist. The martial artist kneeled, touching the storage chest containing the Ultimate Dragon Balls, and pressed the middle and index fingers of his free hand to his forehead, snapping away and bringing the Black Star Dragon Balls back to Earth in an instant.
"Whaaa! You scared Mr. Popo!" Mr. Popo exclaimed when Yamcha appeared in front of him as the djinn was carrying a lamp full of water to water the palm trees of the God Temple.
"Sorry, Mr. Popo! I've brought back the Ultimate Dragon Balls from space!" Yamcha snickered, placing the storage unit down and pressing the button to open it up. With the upper half of the chest sliding off, the Ultimate Dragon Balls were revealed to be stored inside. "Phew! Now the Earth won't blow up!"
"It is good news indeed, Yamcha," Kami Upa nodded, stepping out from the palace. "What about the others?"
"Yeah, they're safe and sound. The Galactic Patrol will take them home the rest of the way. They've got a first-class space carrier voyage home, so I wouldn't worry about them. I'm going to see how Pearl is doing and leave it to the Galactic Patrol to get those guys home. After everything, they deserved a few days of relaxation on a space cruise," Yamcha offered the local deity his enthusiastic thumb up.
"So, peace has returned to Earth once more…" Kami Upa sighed in relief.
"What about the Dragon Balls?" Dende ran up to Yamcha from inside the temple. "I've felt something… Profound loneliness… I can't explain it."
"Oh, yeah… Goku asked the Divine Dragon to merge the Dragon Balls with him. The Dragon Balls have become inactive, but Goku used that power to dissipate the negative energy stored in the Dragon Balls over the years of intense usage. Gohan said he moved on to Limbo after running out of wishing energy, but he left behind the Four-Star Dragon Ball that becomes active when Goku's got enough wishing energy to return, and that he'll be back one day," Yamcha explained to the best of his ability.
"Son Goku did that!?" Mr. Popo exclaimed. "What an incredible guy!"
"So the Dragon Balls are no longer linked to my life…" Dende said, looking equal part relieved and somber. "It really is impressive that Goku-san managed to eradicate the negative energy and save the Earth from all of its ill effects, but… I wish it didn't have to come at such a steep price. Not to mention, it'll take time getting used to not hearing everyone's wishes and feeling connected with everyone's hopes and dreams."
"Huh? You mean you could tell? I wonder if Piccolo ever felt anything like that when he was linked with the Dragon Balls?" Yamcha scratched his chin, feeling curious.
"Piccolo was not as magically attuned as Dende is. Dende is the Ultimate Dragon Clan Namekian, and my star pupil in the divine arts of creation and mysticism," Kami Upa pointed out. "He's much more intimately connected to the Dragon Balls and the inner workings of Namekian magic. That must be why he felt such a close connection to them while being life-linked."
"I guess… Anyway, you guys take care! I'm gonna bring Pearl-chan up here to get married!" Yamcha waved farewells before taking off.
"The God Temple has become a glorified wedding venue…" Kami Upa's eye twitched before he sighed his minor frustrations away and turned around to return to his temple to continue his work. God's work became smooth like butter after all traces of negative energy vanished, making the planet's innate spirit as strong as ever. No natural disasters as much as peeked, and people's mood was the best and the most hopeful it's ever been. "I have a feeling that this peace is going to last for a long time," Kami Upa nodded to himself with a warm smile.
Never since he took reign as the Earth's God have things ever looked so hopeful and bright.