Note: Hello to all my lovely readers! I'm sure you're shocked to see that the vast majority of Turgid has gone missing. This was not an accident.

For quite some time now I've been toying with the idea of revamping Turgid. When I first start this fic I had just a vague idea of a plot rattling around in my head, but nothing with real substance which was a mistake in the long run. As the years went on, I've hashed out a plot which I'm happy with, but I'm not 100% happy with the progression of the story that I had published so far and how it fits into the overall story in my head. It's been a decade plus since I started this story, and plots and ideas change, as does the person writing them. I never thought this story would take up so much of my life and passion, or have so many dedicated followers. I truly am blown away by all the love I've received for Turgid over the years, but in order for me to continue with the story, something had to change. I knew that if I didn't take the plunge and revamp it, I'd never keep going. Or, the story would suffer even more, and I love this story too much to see that happen.

I originally wasn't going to touch Turgid here until I was done rewriting it, but as I've been going through a reworking it, I decided that taking it down and starting from the beginning would be best in the end. I don't think it would be kind to readers to keep the original story uploaded when I have these plans to change it.

I hope I haven't upset too many of you. just know that I haven't given up, and that Turgid will slowly but surely be updated!

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto

Chapter One: Fresh Start for a Broken Heart

The light of the morning sun was beautiful. Every sunrise was magical. The ethereal, golden glow of the rising ball on the horizon cast the village in its warmth like a smile, welcoming the people to a brand new day. Heralding fresh starts, promises of joy and whispers of good tidings with the winds that trickled alongside morning's first breaths. Many of the villagers had long since been up and were already tilling fields or were knee deep in the rice paddies. The roofs of the humble buildings were ablaze in the morning glow, the water of the paddies looking like mirrors, reflecting the golden hues, sometimes appearing like shattered glass as the winds swept through the valley. Reeds hummed, trees whispered as their leaves rustled, and the morning songbirds were trilling. The green of the hillsides looked cut from emerald. It was like a scene from a painting, and jade eyes observed the picturesque beauty from the vantage point her small home gave her. It had been this way for the past two years.

Two years ago she stumbled upon the village and there she had remained since then. The people called it Hougyoku, Jewel, and she couldn't blame them. It was a hidden jewel, nestled away in a mountainous valley. Peaceful, serene, placid - there had been no strife since the day she arrived. At least, no strife in comparison to what she had been accustomed to. When she had first arrived there had been some hub-bub, she admitted to herself. She was a stranger after all. Still, the people were kind and they generously took her in, fed her, and had allowed her to stay. One, because this generosity that was commonplace in Hougyoku, and two, because she was skilled in the medical field, and they were short on residents trained in such ways. They eagerly accepted her as one of their own when she proved that she could help set broken bones, accurately assess and treat injuries, and tell apart the different medicines that were stocked within the small clinic. It impressed the villagers.

Yes, Haruno Sakura was a welcome addition to Hougyoku.

The woman had accepted her role with ease, professionalism, and a strict kindness the people needed. They admired her, adored her even, and she had to admit that she was content with her languid life there in the village.

Thankfully, Hougyoku wasn't completely rural. The village had electricity, and though it marred the beauty of the location, she would not give it up. Plumbing was not a luxury she had wanted to live without, and neither was refrigeration. Without it, the cold of the old, silver fridge in their clinic vaccines would not keep. Not to mention air conditioning and heating. No electricity meant her patients would be miserable during the brutal summer days and freezing during the cold winter months - herself and the villagers included. She even had cable television; just a few channels in this more remote location, but it was better than nothing. It wasn't Konoha, but it was home.

She winced at the thought of the hidden village and she quickly pushed thoughts of it aside. With a deep, calming breath, she finished the last inch of her coffee before rising from the small chair perched outside her front door and retreated back into her home, preparing for the day's work she knew was to come.

It wasn't long before she was walking along the dusty roads greeting people as she went, taking the familiar path to the clinic. Her sandaled feet churned small waves of dust about her, but she didn't mind the dirt between her toes. Sakura wasn't one for closed toe shoes, having spent her entire life with her ten little piggies peeking out. Living in Hougyoku meant living with dust; it just came with the deal.

"Good morning, Sakura-san!" villagers would greet as she approached. She'd smile and wave and give her own pleasantries. A man, Juri, rode past on his old bicycle like he did each morning, the baskets fixed to the bike overflowing with the bags of rice he delivered around the town. The weight made him wobble slightly over the slightly uneven terrain as he came dashing by.

"Hello, hello, Sakura-san!" he called out merrily. "It's good to see you on this lovely morning!" She always loved his enthusiasm. Ever since she helped him when he took a rather nasty fall one day and sprained his ankle, he was always extremely kind to her.

"Good morning, Yuri-san!" she returned as he sped past. "It's lovely to see you, as well! Tell Midori-chan I said hello!" she added before he got too far away, referring to the man's wife.

"I will…!" Sakura chuckled to herself and grinned the rest of the way to the clinic.

"Ah, Sakura-sama, you're here." Even though many years older than her, the owner of the clinic always treated Sakura with the utmost respect. She knew it was her skill in medicine and medical ninjutsu that heralded such reverence. Sakura was the first medical ninja that had come through their small town in many, many decades.

"Good morning, Yanagi-sama," she returned to the elderly, silver haired man, who was grinding away at herbs in a mortar and pestle. It was an extremely fragrant smell that immediately wafted into her nose. Not unpleasant, it was merely overpowering and she wrinkled her nose in retaliation to the strong aroma. Yanagi ceased his attack to turn and look at her over his round, wired-framed glasses to offer her a smile.

"I see you're well. How did the weekend treat you?" Weekends were Sakura's days off from the clinic. Some days found her there, anyway, when she had nothing to do and so she volunteered her efforts, no extra pay expected.

"Well, thank you. And yourself?" The old man hummed in response to her own asking.

"Fine, fine… I was able to catch up with my reading." He sounded exceptionally pleased with that, Sakura noted with a grin, as he turned back to his herb grinding. There was a hint of pain, though, that followed with it, as it made her think of another man who had often caught up on his reading when he had his own days off. Sakura pushed such memories aside and began to take her morning inventory. The task often helped to preoccupy her mind when it threatened to wander to places she deemed dangerous.

"I'm glad for you," she replied as she counted the number of bandages they had, "reading is always a good thing."

"Did you do anything fun, or did your overzealousness find you here on your days off again?" Sakura dipped her head and grinned sheepishly at the accusation since he could not see it.

"Come now, Yanagi-sama… You say that like it's a bad thing."

"Aaahhh, so you were here, were you?" he chastised. She puffed out her cheeks, trying not to laugh.

"Nooo," she retorted. "I was not. If you must know," she began to admit, faking a hurt tone, "I was at home, and remained there like a slug, all day long." The old man laughed and she grinned.

"Like a slug, you say?! Hah!" His attack on the herbs became more vigorous with his humor. "Well I'm glad you did! You work too hard. Everyone deserves a day to be a 'slug' as you so eloquently put it." Sakura chuckled to herself, though thoughts of slugs let her mind creep back into dangerous waters once more. Changing the subject, she inquired more about the man's own weekend off as she continued to mull over the items about her. Like herself, Yanagi also had the weekends off - a perk of owning the clinic, she mused.

"Oh, not much. I tended to the bonsai and let my wife pester me like an old, married man like myself should." Sakura grinned wider. Yanagi always made her laugh, his humor something she never grew tired of. He unexpectedly winced in a hiss of pain and she immediately looked his way, heart skipping a beat.

"What's wrong?" she asked, her concern for him apparent in her voice and stance.

"Oh, nothing, it's just this damned wrist of mine. Carpal tunnel acting up again." Yanagi started when she was suddenly at his side. She was too quick and silent for her own good, and often startled him thusly. Two years later and he still was not completely accustomed to it.

"Here, let me see it," she offered, her hands presented to him, waiting for him to offer his own to her. Sakura knew there was a time Yanagi was secretly fearful of her when he first discovered she was a ninja. After the spectacle of her ninjutsu, and experiencing the effects first hand, it did not take long for him to grow comfortable in her presence and with her skills. These days he did not hesitate to let the kunoichi treat him. Many of the villagers had followed suit. Others had taken longer to cozy up to the idea, but eventually came around. Some had no choice.

When Sakura first arrived at Hougyoku she had tried to keep her abilities a secret so she would fit in. That hadn't lasted long. There had been an accident and a man was dying. No one could save him. No one but Sakura. With the knowledge her shishou had passed onto her and the chakra in her body, she alone could save his life. The man was young, strong, with a family and a newborn, and Sakura couldn't stand by and watch him die just because she didn't want to start trouble. She couldn't be that selfish. The villagers were unsure of what to do with the knowledge of her abilities, but they couldn't deny that she was needed, that she was useful, and that she was now a hero.

Sakura had honestly thought her time in the village would end. It had happened before in other civilian cities so far north of the major ninja countries. But Hougyoku was different - they were willing to keep her, and she still remembered how amazed she had been at the news.

Letting those memories dissipate, she focused on the present. Pale, blue-green light flooded about their hands as she worked her way into his flesh, past connective tissue, past fat and muscle, into the ligaments, the tendons, between the bones, helping to relieve the inflammation years of grinding away at the pestle brought. The old man's face, slightly contorted with discomfort, gently ebbed into something more peaceful until he looked completely relaxed. A sigh of relief escaped him.

"I told you you should let me check on your wrist more frequently," she chastised with a click of her tongue. Yanagi rolled and tested the appendage, obviously pleased with the results.

"What can I say? I'm a forgetful old man!" he laughed out, and Sakura rolled her eyes not for the first time at her employer.

"I'm serious, Yanagi," she retorted, giving the old doctor a serious look.

"I know, I know. I will. I can't let everyone else hog your skills, I guess! It's a shame there aren't more of you here. We could really use more medic-nins here in these parts. Well, if those superstitious ninnies would let them!" Sakura pursed her lips; thoughts of other medic-nins did nothing to brighten her mood. That twinkle in her eyes faded and she was sure Yanagi noticed.

Everyone knew of the heartache that she had gone through. Though she did not often talk about her past, she had to share at least the bare minimum to the villagers when she first arrived in order to gain their trust and remain Hougyoku. She had to tell even more the day her true abilities had been revealed. All they knew was that her home had been destroyed and she had nowhere to go. Yanagi assumed her family and friends had been taken from her, too, but he never had the heart to ask.

The people of these lands knew about the ninja who lived to the far south of them, but such a distance separated them that they rarely dealt with shinobi. Thus, ninja had become more of a myth, a legend, than a reality. It wasn't hard to imagine why they feared Sakura as they did. Her abilities as a medic-nin were exceptional, anyone would admit this. For their sake, though, Sakura did not tell them that she could kill a man with one flick to the head, that she could rip apart trees with her bare hands or rift trenches with a kick of her leg, all without breaking a sweat. She did not tell them just how deadly chakra could be in the hands of someone with control such as herself. There were some things they didn't need to know. Some mysteries that were best kept secret. It was with pride she could say that in the two years she had lived amongst the villagers she never brought trouble with her. She was a blessing to Hougyoku, not the curse they had anticipated her to be.

"It's seven o'clock," Yanagi abruptly stated, and that sadness on Sakura's face vanished with the implications of those words. The clinic opened in half an hour and there was much left to be done…

Just as the rising sun walked her to work, the setting sun walked her home that evening. She had wanted to stay later but Yanagi insisted she go home, and Sakura didn't have it in her to argue with the man who paid her. She secretly dreaded going back home that evening. Yanagi definitely had noted how absent-minded she had been, sadness in her eyes more than once. If only he knew why, perhaps he wouldn't have sent her away, but she couldn't blame him. He had no idea what today marked for her.

She had been able to admire that morning's beauty, but she found she could not fully appreciate the marvelous sunset that engulfed the village. The vivid magenta marring the jagged horizon like wounds in the fading cobalt and lavender sky, bleeding that magnificent color, did not phase her like it would most evenings. Typically wholehearted good nights and hellos on the trip home through the farms and rice paddies were forced. Yuri rode past her on his bike once more. The not so eager response she gave him was mistaken for exhaustion.

Arriving home, she attempted to preoccupy herself with what she could: showering, making dinner, watching television, reading a book, sitting outside on her front porch to enjoy the moonlight as cast its shine upon the village - none of it worked. Eventually she had nothing left to do but to sit down in silence and finally accept the truth of the day. Despite having found this little haven tucked neatly away into the countryside, far, far away from where she once called home, there was still one truth that would always remain: her home was gone, Konoha as she once knew it was no more, and her life would never, ever be the same.

She found it unfair that she survived and her friends and family had not. That she was stuck to live and bear that burden. She had wished so many times that she had passed on, too. That life was not so cruel as to leave her, without her loved ones, alone in the world. Although she was not the only survivor, those who had come out alive alongside her were mostly unfamiliar faces. People she did not know. But for even those few familiar faces she couldn't stay behind and start again. There was no point. Suna had fallen, and so had Rock and Mist, not too long after. Everything, gone. Gone, gone, gone. Madara didn't exactly accomplish everything he had wanted, but to the kunoichi, he might as well have. Akatsuki had fulfilled their schemes of crushing the hidden villages even if their lives were also taken in the process. Madara was gone, but not without his own victories, for his demise also meant the end of those she held most dear. Naruto, Kakashi, Sai… Tsunade, Lee, Ino… everyone… Dead. Dying in her arms. And she couldn't save them. She hadn't been strong enough. Even Sasuke was gone… they had never saved him from himself, and he died an enemy. She had spent many sleepless nights contemplating the cruelty of her survival.

Fresh tears rolled down her face as the memories bombarded her once more. She thought she had controlled herself, had come to grips, but she was beginning to think that she never would. Fear, guilt, shame, anger… it all boiled within her, coursing through her veins. She wanted to break something, to tear the earth apart and find them and not for the first time. Five years had now passed and she still could remember their faces vividly, as if it had occurred the day before. Some weeks were easier than others. Sometimes she would go months without thinking too hard about it, but with the fifth anniversary now here, she couldn't help but be upset. It had been the same every year since then. She knew it would be the same for many more years to come.

Sakura took in a deep, ragged breath, trying to control herself. Trying to keep calm and level headed. The last thing she wished to do was to destroy her little home and startle her fellow residents just to quench her rage. She couldn't throw away the trust she had built over the last two years with one night's foolishness. So instead she sobbed, painfully, until she was spent, until she had nothing left to give, only to lay curled up in a ball upon her bed, memories of her friends' dying faces haunting her as she drifted off into uneasy sleep…