Unsteady

The car was silent as they drove to STAR Labs in the morning. They were a half hour early—Joe was anxious to leave the house and get to Barry's appointment—but they assumed Caitlin wouldn't mind if they were early. Sure enough, when they got there, she was ready for Barry, as if she had been expecting them to arrive at that time.

"How are you doing, Barry?" she asked sadly when they walked into the cortex.

"I'm fine," Barry assured her firmly, "I just want to get this over with."

Caitlin nodded in sympathy. Joe stepped forward then to address the doctor.

"How serious is this, Caitlin?" he asked gravely.

He had stayed up late, researching leukemia on the internet, filling his mind with worst-case scenarios and medical information he didn't fully understand but knew enough about to be terrified out of his mind for Barry. Joe had been up all night, tossing and turning as he thought of questions to ask Caitlin. He had barely slept, and judging by the shadows under his eyes, neither had Barry.

"I won't know that until I analyze his biopsy," Caitlin said, not looking him in the eye.

Joe instantly got the feeling there was something she wasn't telling them.

"Barry said you were analyzing some scans," he persisted, "What did you find?"

Joe was a trained observer, which was why he didn't miss the way Caitlin winced slightly at his words, her eyes turning down to the floor.

"I'll discuss that with you two after the biopsy," she said softly.

"I'd rather discuss it now," Joe replied, crossing his arms.

"Joe," Barry sighed tiredly, "I'd rather just get this over with first. We can discuss the rest after."

Joe looked over at Barry then. He was looking at the floor, an uncomfortable expression on his face. Joe figured he knew why. Barry wasn't very eager to go over his test results. He didn't want to know what Caitlin had found. Joe, however, was on edge. He didn't want to wait.

But he respected Barry's wishes. He was the one who was sick, and if he wanted to wait until after his procedure, then Joe would do that. He'd do whatever Barry wanted. Anything to make this easier for him.

"Is anyone else here?" Barry asked, nervously looking around.

"No," Caitlin assured him, "Harry and Jesse are apartment shopping, and Cisco doesn't usually come in on Saturdays."

"Okay," Barry said quietly.

"Here," Caitlin said, handing him a hospital gown, "You can change in the bathroom if you want."

Barry looked down at the gown in his hands.

"Do I have to wear this?" he asked reluctantly.

"Just for today," Caitlin said, giving him a sympathetic look, "I'll be extracting the marrow from your hip. It'll be easier if you're wearing a gown."

Barry nodded silently and reluctantly made his way over to the bathroom then, gown in hand. As soon as the bathroom door was closed, Joe immediately spun on Caitlin.

"What aren't you telling us?" he demanded.

Caitlin looked sadly back at him.

"Joe," she said in a strained voice.

"Please," he choked, "I know Barry wants to wait until after this, but I need to know now. What do his scans look like?"

Caitlin opened and closed her mouth a couple times, no words escaping her.

"They're bad, aren't they?" Joe asked sadly.

Caitlin took a deep breath and then nodded.

"Yeah," she whispered, "Yeah, they're bad. I knew they were bad as soon as I first saw them yesterday. I just…I didn't want to scare Barry. I didn't want to tell him until after this procedure."

"Is he going to be okay?" Joe choked, his voice cracking.

Caitlin gave him a somber look.

"I'm going to do everything in my power to treat him, Joe," she assured him, "We'll get him through this."

Joe nodded and wiped his eyes.

"Thank you," he whispered, "And thank you…for this. For today. I know I wouldn't be here right now if it weren't for you. Thank you for urging Barry to tell me. Knowing him, he would have kept it a secret as long as possible."

Caitlin nodded sadly.

"Yeah," she sighed, "You're right. That's what he initially wanted to do. I told him he needed to tell at least one person, though, and…I think he chose you because he knew you'd be able to handle it. I know how hard it is, trying not to fall apart, but for Barry's sake, we really need to keep it together right now. Staying calm is key to making this easier on Barry right now. I think he's still in shock from the news."

"So am I," Joe sighed, "I…I never thought something like this could happen to Barry, and not just because he's the Flash. He's…Barry."

"No one ever expects this to happen to someone they love," Caitlin said understandingly.

Joe nodded and wiped his eyes again.

"This procedure," he said then, "This…biopsy. What should I expect?"

"It's going to be painful," Caitlin warned, "Bone marrow biopsies are already painful, even with anesthetics, but with Barry's metabolism…"

"You really can't give him anything?" Joe asked desperately.

"I have a local anesthetic for him," Caitlin said quickly, "But it's not going to help very much. Hopefully it'll help a little, but I'm really just hoping it'll have more of a placebo effect than anything else. I'm going to be honest with you. This is just the beginning. As Barry moves into treatment, his immunity to pain killers is going to continue to be a problem. I'm going to do everything in my power to make things as easy on him as possible, but this isn't going to be pretty."

Joe felt a twisting feeling in his gut with her words. Before he could say anything, though, Barry emerged from the bathroom, wearing the hospital gown. He gripped the hem of it awkwardly, clearly uncomfortable. Caitlin gave him an encouraging smile and ushered him to the med bay. Barry sighed as he sat on the cushioned examination table, his long legs hanging over the edge.

"Okay, Barry," Caitlin said gently, "I'm going to have you laying on your side, and I'll be extracting the marrow sample from your hip bone. It's a fairly simple procedure, and—"

"I know how bone marrow is extracted," Barry said softly.

Caitlin pressed her lips together and nodded.

"Can you lay on your side for me?" she asked gently then.

Barry complied, laying down on the table, on his side so that he was facing away from the doctor. Joe quickly moved around the table so that he was standing on the side Barry was facing. He took Barry's hand gently in his own and gave him a supportive smile. Barry's lips twitched gratefully in return.

"Okay, Barry," Caitlin said softly, as she untied the back of his gown, "Could you draw your knees up towards your chest, please?"

Barry sighed and pulled his knees up so that he was situated in a way that resembled the fetal position. He looked so small. It broke Joe's heart to see the man he had always known to be so strong suddenly looking so small and vulnerable. The ache in his heart lingered as Joe watched Caitlin pull out her supplies. Barry flinched slightly when she started cleansing the expanse of skin on the back of his hip, but his expression remained calm.

Joe's gut wrenched when he saw the doctor pull out a large syringe, and the feeling worsened when Barry chose the exact wrong moment to look back at what she was doing.

"Woah, that's a big needle," Barry breathed, facing forward again.

Joe gave his hand a small squeeze.

"It's just a local anesthetic," Caitlin explained, exchanging a knowing look with Joe, "It should help keep the pain to a minimum."

"Won't my metabolism burn right through it?" Barry asked immediately.

"No, Barry," Caitlin said, exchanging another sad look with Joe, "It…it's extra potent. It should help with some of the pain."

Joe and Caitlin both knew that to be untrue, but they were both hoping it would help put Barry's mind at ease.

"Okay," Caitlin said, holding the needle a couple inches away from his hip, "You're just going to feel a slight pinch."

Joe didn't watch her slide the needle into him. Instead, he watched Barry's face, rubbing small circles into the back of his hand. Barry suddenly hissed in pain, squeezing Joe's hand.

"Sorry," Caitlin said regretfully, withdrawing the needle, "Hopefully, that will help, though."

Joe didn't watch as she started pulling out the rest of her tools. Instead, he looked at Barry, who looked up and gave him a small smile.

"I'm fine," he whispered reassuringly.

Joe smiled sadly at him and gave his hand a small squeeze.

"Okay, I'm going to start now, Barry," Caitlin said, her voice somber, "It's just a small incision."

"Okay," Barry whispered, his eyes still on Joe.

Joe could see it in Barry's eyes then. Barry knew they were lying to him. He knew the pain killers weren't going to work for him. He was just going along with the charade to placate them. All three of them knew the truth, but they all played along with the pretense.

Joe couldn't look at what Caitlin was doing. He wasn't really the type to get woozy at the sight of blood, but he didn't want to risk it. The last thing they needed right now was for him to pass out or throw up. Barry sucked in a breath and squeezed his eyes shut when Caitlin made the cut. He squeezed Joe's hand harder, just hard enough to hurt.

"You're doing good, Barry," Caitlin praised, setting down her scalpel, "I'll be going into the bone next. Do you want a small break first?"

"No," Barry gritted, opening his eyes, which were now watering, "Just get it done—b-before the incision heals."

"Alright," Caitlin whispered.

Joe chose the wrong moment to look over at what the doctor was doing. Caitlin had a small screw-like instrument, and she was getting ready to screw it into Barry's hip bone. Joe thought he was going to be sick as he quickly looked back at Barry again.

"Ah," Barry gasped when Caitlin started.

His eyes squeezed shut again, and this time, he crushed Joe's hand. Joe rubbed Barry's arm with his free hand while letting Barry squeeze the other one as hard as he needed to. He thought his hand was about to break, but he didn't let go of Barry's. Barry didn't scream. He didn't cry or yell out. He kept his mouth clamped shut, just like his eyes, and his face was quickly turning red.

"Breathe, Barry," Joe coaxed gently when he realized Barry was holding his breath, "You're doing good, son. Just breathe."

Barry sucked in a strained breath, and when he released it, a small whine escaped his lips. Joe had seen Barry hurt on more than a few occasions before, but Barry had always been very good about not making any sound. He always internalized his pain. If he was making sound now, the pain of the procedure must have been significant.

"Almost done, Barry," Caitlin choked.

Joe's eyes snapped up to the doctor then to see that she was crying. Caitlin was crying as she worked on Barry, knowing how much pain she was causing him. Joe could see now why Caitlin wanted Barry to have another person here for this. He couldn't imagine going through it alone.

"What the hell?!"

Joe's head spun to look over at the doorway, where Cisco was suddenly standing behind Caitlin, staring at the wound on Barry's hip with wide eyes.

"Are you taking his bone marrow?!" he asked incredulously before anyone could say anything.

"Cisco, get out!" Barry shouted, tears streaming down his face.

He kept facing forward, not even looking over his shoulder to see Cisco as he shouted at him. He couldn't move. He just kept his eyes squeezed shut as he yelled in anguish.

"Get out of here! Please!"

Cisco looked at Joe in confusion, and Joe gave him a small shake of the head.

"Sorry, Cisco," he said gently, "We'll explain it to you later. You should go."

Cisco opened and closed his mouth a few times, utterly confused and lost for words. Finally, he just nodded, and with one last glance at the procedure he had walked in on, he left the room, an ill and confused look on his face.

Joe turned back to Barry then, who was gasping for breath, tears running down his face.

"He wasn't supposed to be here," he choked, a small sob escaping his lips.

"It's okay, Barry," Joe soothed, rubbing his arm, "Don't worry about it, it's alright. Just try to calm down. We're almost done now."

Barry didn't say anything. He kept his eyes squeezed shut and continued to crush Joe's hand. Caitlin resumed the procedure, but Joe didn't pay any attention to what she was doing. He focused solely on rubbing Barry's arm and whispering soothing words of encouragement in his ear.

"Done," Caitlin said quietly after what felt like an eternity, "The hard part's over, Barry."

Joe caught a glimpse of the specimen container she was sealing and putting on ice, but he quickly looked back at Barry again when it made his stomach churn.

"All done," Joe soothed, his voice cracking, "We're done. You did so good, Bar."

It had been so much worse than he had been expecting. Joe hoped to God there wouldn't be any more procedures like this. Barry was strong enough to handle it, but Joe didn't think he was strong enough to witness it.

Barry blearily opened his eyes, and his grip on Joe's hand finally loosened. His hand slid from Joe's, and Barry quickly used it to wipe his eyes.

"Good," he breathed.

He was clammy and pale now, and his hands were shaking horribly as he wiped the tears and sweat from his face. Caitlin was quick about stitching and dressing the wound on Barry's hip, and although Barry gritted his teeth the entire time, he seemed to endure the pain better than the actual procedure.

"Good job, Barry," Caitlin said sadly, as she retied the back of his hospital gown, "You can relax now. You can rest."

Barry nodded weakly, but he didn't move. He just stayed in the side-lying position he was in and closed his eyes.

"Should we move him to the bed?" Joe whispered unsurely to the doctor then.

Caitlin shook her head.

"He's going to be very sore," she sighed, "Best not to move him too much. There are pillows and blankets in the cupboard there. Do what you can to make him more comfortable. I'm going to…"

She awkwardly held up the specimen container.

"Go," Joe said, understanding, "I'll take care of him. Go, start analyzing it."

Caitlin nodded, and with one last sad look at Barry, she left the room. Joe turned back to Barry then. He was still lying in the same position, his knees pulled up to his chest. It didn't look at all comfortable to Joe, but he didn't say anything. Instead, he went over to the cupboard and started pulling out pillows and a blanket.

Barry didn't move or say anything as Joe slid a pillow under his head and propped one behind his back before covering him up. He kept his eyes closed, completely exhausted from the procedure. Joe thought Barry was asleep, but he was surprised when Barry suddenly spoke.

"Joe," he muttered, his eyes still closed.

"I'm right here, Bar," Joe whispered, taking his hand, "It's okay. I'm right here."

"Joe, Cisco's going to know now," he mumbled.

"It's alright," Joe choked, "Cisco will be fine. Just worry about yourself right now. Okay?"

Barry nodded tiredly.

"Thank you," he muttered, "For being here."

"Of course, Bar," Joe choked, "I'll always be here for you."

"What the hell was that?!" Cisco demanded as soon as Caitlin stepped into the cortex, "You're analyzing his bone marrow now?! I understand wanting to research blood samples from him, but Caitlin, this is sick! This is going way too far! I can't believe Barry agreed to this! I can't believe what I just saw!"

"Cisco," Caitlin said softly, walking over to her microscope, "This isn't what you think it is. It's not just about research."

"What is it then?" Cisco asked in confusion, "What's going on that would cause you to screw a giant corkscrew into Barry's bone? That was one of the sickest things I've ever seen!"

Caitlin let out a heavy sigh.

"I didn't want to do it," she said sadly, "But I had to."

"Why?" Cisco demanded.

Caitlin looked at him with tearful eyes.

"Barry's sick, Cisco," she said softly.

The outrage left Cisco's face then and morphed into a look of concern.

"What do you mean?" he asked quietly, "What do you mean, Barry's sick?"

Caitlin took a deep breath and let it out shakily.

"He…" she choked, "He has cancer. Barry has leukemia."

Cisco stared at her.

"That's not funny," he said seriously, "That…that's not funny, Caitlin."

"You really think I'd joke about something like that?" Caitlin asked, her voice cracking.

Cisco's hand slowly moved up to cover his mouth as he began to grasp what Caitlin was telling him.

"How?" he choked, "How can he…?"

"I have a few theories," Caitlin said softly, "But I won't know much until I finish analyzing this."

She held up the specimen container with shaky hands.

"How can I help?" Cisco asked urgently, glancing back towards the closed door to the med bay, "Should I…?"

"I don't know if going in there is the best idea, Cisco," she said sadly, "Barry's exhausted and upset. He didn't want you to find out that way."

"He's my best friend," Cisco choked, tears in his eyes, "If he's sick, I want to be there for him. He seriously wasn't going to tell me?"

"He only just found out yesterday," Caitlin said solemnly, "He's still processing it. We still don't know much about it. That's what this sample was for."

"How long will it take you to analyze it?" Cisco asked urgently, looking at the cup in her hand.

"A few hours," she said uncertainly, "It depends on what I find."

"What am I supposed to do?" Cisco persisted, "What am I supposed to do for the next few hours, Caitlin? I just want to help. I don't know medicine, so I can't help you, and Barry doesn't want me in the room, so what can I…?"

Caitlin gave him a sympathetic look.

"You could find a wheelchair for him," she suggested, "He shouldn't be walking around for the rest of today until he heals. A wheelchair would be a big help."

"Okay," Cisco said seriously, glad he could help, even if it was in a small way, "I'll charge the one he used when Zoom broke his—"

"Actually," Caitlin said uneasily, "I don't think that's a good idea. Barry's struggling with this a lot right now, and I don't think he could bear going back into Wells' chair again. It was hard enough convincing him to use it the first time. I think we have some standard chairs downstairs somewhere."

"Okay," Cisco nodded, "Good idea."

Having something to do helped tremendously. Cisco had just had a bomb dropped on him. His best friend had cancer. Barry had cancer. The shock of it hadn't worn off, and Cisco didn't know what to do. He wanted to instantly spring into action. He wanted to fix this immediately because that was what he did. He fixed things.

There wasn't anything he could do, though. He could find a wheelchair. It was such a little help, but it was something. Being able to do something, no matter how small, helped ease the sense of helplessness Cisco was now feeling.

He just wished he could do more.

"Barry, you should lay down a little longer," Joe urged, "Caitlin's still analyzing the sample. You should use this time to rest."

"I slept for an hour already," Barry said stubbornly, "I feel fine, and I don't want to just lay here all day, so please, just help me sit up."

Joe let out a heavy sigh.

"Okay," he said reluctantly, "We'll get you into a wheelchair."

"I don't need a wheelchair," Barry insisted, "I'm fine."

"Barry, you can't even sit up by yourself," Joe pointed out.

Barry was still laying on his side on the examination table. He had tried to sit up twice already, but the pain in his hip didn't allow for much mobility.

"Fine," Barry sighed after a moment, "I'll go back in the chair."

Joe nodded sadly at him. He knew Barry would have a hard time with the chair. He had obviously hoped he would never have to use it again after his spine healed.

"Is it okay if I bring Cisco in here?" Joe asked quietly.

Barry gave him an uneasy look at these words. He opened and closed his mouth once but didn't say anything before nodding and looking down.

"I guess I have to face him eventually," he sighed.

Joe nodded sadly and then made his way to the door. As he stepped out into the cortex, it was to find Caitlin still there, still hunched over her microscope. Cisco was only a few feet away from her, tinkering with a wheelchair, tightening the bolts on each wheel. Joe was surprised to see it was just a standard wheelchair and not the electric one Barry had used before. He supposed it made sense, though. It wasn't as practical, but it would be easier for Barry to get into—emotionally speaking.

"Is Barry awake?" Caitlin asked him when he entered the cortex.

"Yeah," Joe sighed, "He just woke up, and he's anxious to get up. I was going to get a chair for him, but it looks like Cisco has it covered."

"Is he okay?" Cisco asked worriedly, "I'm so sorry for walking in like that. I know that's not how Barry wanted me to find out about this. Really, I'm okay, though. I'm just worried about him."

"He is upset," Joe admitted, "But it's better that you know. Really, the sooner everybody knows, the better."

Cisco nodded sadly.

"Can I help?" he asked quietly, "Is there anything I can do?"

Joe nodded.

"Come on," he said quietly, gesturing toward the room.

Cisco followed nervously as Joe entered the med bay, Cisco pushing the wheelchair in through the doorway after him. He looked over at the bed as soon as he walked in, shuddering slightly as he thought of what he had walked in on the last time he walked through that door.

Barry was still laying on his side, the same way he had been before. As Cisco rounded the bed with Joe and came into his line of sight, Barry gave him an uneasy look.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, "I'm sorry for shouting at you. I'm so sorry you found out the way you did."

"Don't worry about it, man," Cisco said, pulling a smile up onto his face, even though smiling was the last thing he felt like doing right now, "I got you a chair. Not as high tech as the last one, but you can do some pretty sick wheelies on this bad boy."

It worked. Barry's lips twitched into a small smile at these words.

"Thanks, Cisco," he said tiredly, both of them knowing the real reason why he was thanking him.

Barry had been clearly dreading getting back into Wells' chair.

"Alright, Bar. You ready?" Joe asked, pulling the covers from Barry.

Barry nodded, and Joe gently slid a hand under him to help lift his upper half from the bed. Barry's bare legs slid over the side of the bed, and he hissed in pain as he was brought to an upright sitting position.

It was weird seeing Barry like this—weak and frail, wearing a hospital gown. Cisco hadn't seen him like this since the coma. Barry hadn't been his friend at the time, though, so this time, it was so much harder to witness.

"Can you help me with my pants?" Barry asked Joe, blushing deeply, "I can get my shirt."

"Of course, Bar," Joe said softly, grabbing Barry's clothes for him.

Cisco watched somberly as Joe helped Barry slide his legs into a pair of jeans. Barry took care of his shirt himself, and then Cisco moved to help Barry as he stood up, so Joe could pull his jeans the rest of the way up.

Barry was extremely unsteady as he stood. He noticeably favored one side, shifting most of his weight towards Cisco as Joe finished pulling up Barry's jeans for him. Cisco could feel Barry shaking as he stood, and his breathing was a little more strained, his breath hitching in pain.

Together, Cisco and Joe helped turn Barry and eased him down into the chair. Barry let out a relieved sigh as soon as he was sitting, but Cisco could still see the pain in his eyes as he tried to get comfortable in the chair.

"I'm fine," Barry assured, when he saw the worried looks both men were giving him, "Just a little sore. I'll be healed in a few hours, though."

"Actually, Caitlin said it might take the night," Joe said gently.

Barry's eyebrows furrowed.

"Oh," he said, "I guess that makes sense. My healing is a little slowed right now. I'll be fine, though. This is only temporary."

Joe and Cisco both gave him sad smiles. They all knew this was only the start. It wouldn't be over after this, but hopefully things wouldn't get too bad before Barry was cured. It all depended on what Caitlin found.

As it turned out, they didn't have to wait much longer to find out. Twenty minutes later, Caitlin reentered the med bay, a blank look on her face. They all immediately recognized the look for what it was. It was her doctor face, the one she used when she was trying to control her emotions.

"What did you find, Caitlin?" Barry asked as soon as she walked into the room, "Did you figure out the subtype?"

Caitlin nodded sadly.

"Sort of," she said softly, "It's not like any type of cancer I've seen before. It seems to be unique to your specific physiology, but it's presentation closely resembles acute myeloid leukemia, with translocation of your…eighth chromosome."

Barry's face went completely blank with these words.

"My eighth?" he whispered.

Caitlin nodded, tears quickly filling her eyes.

"It's not a coincidence," she choked, "I…I'm so sorry, Barry."

Barry looked down at his lap, sucking in a shaky breath.

"What are you talking about?" Joe frowned, looking back and forth between the two of them in confusion, "What's not a coincidence?"

Cisco was just as confused. He didn't know much medicine, and he didn't know what was so significant about that particular chromosome.

"It's the same," Barry said quietly, "It's the same chromosome that was mutated and gave me my powers. It was affected by the…"

"The particle accelerator," Cisco breathed, "Oh, my God."

"Wait," Joe said seriously, waving a hand, "Are you saying…?"

"We caused it," Caitlin said in a strained voice, "We caused the mutation that's making Barry sick."

A shocked silence hung over the group. No one knew what to say. Joe was beyond words as he processed what they were telling him, and Cisco and Caitlin couldn't even look at Barry. Both their stomachs were churning horribly.

"How?" Joe then managed to say, the word coming out short and clipped as he stared Cisco and Caitlin down, "How did the particle accelerator…?"

"The accelerator caused multiple mutations in different people," Caitlin explained shakily, "It's likely that when Barry's DNA was altered by the explosion, it was also damaged. It was mutated in multiple ways. And this…this was one of them."

She glanced at Barry then, who was staring at the floor, a sickened look on his face.

"Barry," she choked, tears welling in her eyes, "I don't even know what to say. I can't begin to tell you how sor—"

"Caitlin," Barry said firmly, finally looking up at her as he rearranged his facial expression, "I know you didn't mean for this to happen, any of this. I forgave you both for the particle accelerator a long time ago, and I still forgive you now. Nothing's changed."

"Barry, we gave you cancer," Cisco choked, tears welling in his eyes, "It's not the same thing as us accidentally giving you superpowers. We made you sick. It's okay to be upset with us. It's okay to be angry."

"You made a mistake," Barry said firmly, "Thawne used you. He's the one to blame in all this. Besides, I've made more than my fair share of mistakes. I understand and I forgive you. Please, let's not dwell on this. How I got it doesn't matter. Let's just figure out how to treat it."

"You don't seem surprised," Caitlin said quietly, giving him a sad look.

Barry let out a heavy sigh.

"I can't say that I am," he said softly, "The thought did cross my mind. I was hoping it wouldn't be the case, but the fact that it is doesn't change anything. In fact, it helps us. We know the cause now, and we know how long I've had it for. This is a good thing."

Caitlin nodded and wiped her eyes.

"You're right," she said shakily, "At least we have more information about it. We know now that you've had it for two years."

"How is it that we're just catching it now, though?" Joe asked, somewhat angrily, "How could Barry have had cancer for two years without us knowing?"

He hadn't said anything about the new information they had just revealed, but his face said it all. He didn't forgive them as easily as Barry did.

"I don't know," Caitlin said honestly, "If it had been active, I would have caught it a long time ago. It wasn't in his blood a few weeks ago. It was dormant in his bone marrow, something I've never looked at before, for obvious reasons. It would have been too painful to take a sample for no reason.

"It's strange, though. This type of cancer is known to progress quickly, and it seems to be progressing rapidly now that's it's in its active stage. If he's had it for two years, it should have presented itself a long time ago."

"So why now?" Cisco asked, "Why is it making its appearance now?"

"Unless…" Barry whispered.

They all looked at him.

"Unless what?" Joe pressed, when Barry didn't continue.

Barry shook his head quickly.

"How bad is it?" he asked then, instead turning to Caitlin, "I'm only a few weeks into the active stage, so it can't be that bad, right?"

Joe furrowed his eyebrows at Barry, while Caitlin's eyes fell to the floor, a shaky sigh escaping her lips as she started to explain.

"This type of cancer starts in the bone marrow," she said, "The marrow is responsible for creating new blood cells and platelets. For a normal person, it takes a long time for the mutated cells to build up in the blood stream enough to cause symptoms. But for you…your body produces blood cells at a much faster rate. It only took a few weeks."

"So, what are you saying?" Joe asked quietly.

"I'm saying Barry's cancer is advancing at a much faster rate than a normal person's would," Caitlin said tearfully.

"What…" Barry choked, "What stage am I in?"

Caitlin's lip trembled slightly as she answered him.

"Stage three," she whispered.

Barry paled immediately. He took in a shuddering breath and buried his face in his hands.

"Barry," Caitlin said quickly, putting her hands on his shoulders, "Barry, Barry, it's okay. We're going to treat it."

"What does stage three mean?" Joe choked, "What does that mean, Caitlin?"

Caitlin stoop up straight and wiped her eyes. She took a deep, steadying breath before crossing the room to hang up several x-rays and MRI scans on the light board.

"The cancer has spread," she said shakily, "It traveled through his blood stream and metastasized to other organs."

She pointed out several large white spots on the scans.

"These are all tumors," she explained softly, "They're spread throughout most of his body."

Joe put a hand over his mouth as he looked at the scan.

"Oh, my God," he choked, "Barry."

Cisco didn't say anything. He looked at the scans with a churning feeling in his stomach. Barry was really sick—sicker than he had originally anticipated. It was especially difficult for Cisco to take it all in, considering this morning, to him, Barry was perfectly fine. And now this. Granted, the rest of them had only just found out yesterday. Really, to all of them, it seemed like Barry had gone from perfectly healthy to critically ill within a matter of days—even if he had technically had the cancer for two years.

"It's strange," Caitlin choked, breaking the silence, "Like I said, this doesn't seem to presenting like normal leukemia. Normal AML tends to spread to the lymphatic system, targeting only certain organs. This, though…I've found traces of the cancer in several vital organs, ones that aren't usually affected by this type of cancer. It's much more…aggressive than any type of leukemia I've ever seen. I suspect Barry's powers have something to do with it."

"Is it treatable?" Cisco whispered, his eyes wide as he looked at the scans.

Caitlin gave him an uneasy look, hesitating before answering.

"Of course," she said, not sounding very confident, "Of course we can treat it."

"But can we cure it?" Barry choked, tearing his eyes away from the scans to look at the doctor, "Treating it is one thing, but curing it is another, Caitlin. Is it curable?"

"Yes," Caitlin said tearfully, "We're going to cure you, Barry. It's not going to be easy, but we're going to cure you."

Barry didn't look very reassured at these words. None of them did.

"Okay," Barry whispered, "What do we do first then? How are we going to treat it?"

"I think our best bet will be chemo and radiation therapy," Caitlin said gently, "I'll start working on synthesizing a chemotherapy drug for you, and I should hopefully have it done in time for when we're finished with your pre-chemo treatments."

"Pre-chemo treatments?" Joe whispered.

Caitlin nodded.

"He'll need dialysis treatments and supplemental therapy," she explained, "I analyzed his blood samples, and there are signs of organ damage from the tumors, primarily in his liver and kidneys. Toxins are starting to build up in his bloodstream from the underactive organs. They're not filtering his blood the way they're supposed to. Dialysis will help, and supplements will help get him as healthy as possible before he starts treatment."

"Okay," Joe said determinedly, resting a hand on Barry's shoulder, "So when do we start?"

Caitlin let out a heavy sigh.

"As much as I'd like to do a dialysis treatment today," she said, looking at Barry, "I think it's probably best we wait until tomorrow. I want to give him a day to heal from the biopsy before I make him go through another procedure."

"It's just dialysis," Barry said quietly, "You're just filtering the toxins from my blood. I can handle it. I don't see why we can't do it today."

"The anticoagulants," Caitlin said immediately, "I'm going to have to give you anticoagulants for the process, and I'd be putting you at risk for post-biopsy hemorrhage. No, it's better to wait until you're healed, especially since you're already at increased risk for bleeding because of your low platelets. Dialysis is a risky but necessary procedure for you. It's far from simple in your case. You're at high risk for bleeding complications."

Barry let out a heavy sigh.

"Okay," he said quietly, "I'll be back tomorrow then."

It was clear to everyone that Barry would much rather be anywhere but here. He didn't want to go through all of this, no more than they wanted to see him go through it. His subdued attitude was normal and understandable, but there was something else about Barry's demeanor that seemed to have shifted suddenly. They just didn't know what it was.

Whatever it was, it made them all uneasy.