So…I think you'll like what happens in this chapter. Hope I did a good job with it haha. Enjoy!
Chapter 23
It was quite warm in the hall, so I decided to step out into the main entryway of the Last Homely House. There was a gurgling fountain, and a few people were sitting on benches and conversing, or strolling the walkways. I made my way up to the first floor and stepped out onto the East Porch. It looked deserted, so I made my way across to the end closest to the waterfalls. The cool mist felt nice on my skin, and the rumble of the water hitting the rocks was pleasant.
"My lady," I heard a familiar voice call. Whirling around, I noticed I had walked straight past Candaith when I entered, focused on my destination. "I did not expect to see you here."
"I…well, this is a popular place to get some fresh air." I replied, feeling out of sorts. I had not anticipated running into Candaith on accident. Or him referring to me as 'my lady' instead of using my name.
"I will leave you to your thoughts," he said, rising and turning as if to leave.
"Wait!" I blurted out. He paused, and I continued in a calmer tone, "Please, don't go. I would appreciate the company."
Almost seeming reluctant, he walked across the patio and leaned against the railing, not quite next to me but within comfortable speaking distance. I had to admit that he looked very handsome; he was wearing an almost silvery blue shirt that was delicately embroidered, and his muscular arms and narrow hips were well-defined. His brown hair shone in the moonlight, and I wished he would look at me with his expressive blue eyes, usually full of warmth.
We stood in silence for a few minutes, and my mind was racing with what I should say or do. I hoped to resolve the issue of me going on the journey South before we left tomorrow, as I knew it was at least partly why he was upset with me.
Before I could speak, he asked, "Are you enjoying your evening?"
I tried not to frown; I wanted to get straight to the point, but it seemed small talk would have to come first, "Yes, it has been pleasant. The music was lovely, do you not agree?"
He nodded, "Indeed, the musicians are very skilled." He paused, then added, "Elves dance very elegantly; it is as if their feet are floating above the ground."
I laughed lightly, "It may seem that way, but there is quite a bit of thinking involved. We have also had centuries or even millennia of practice." Another stretch of silence ensued, and I wondered he was thinking. "Did you dance? I do not think I saw you, but there were many people partaking."
He shook his head, "No, I fear I am a poor dancer, and would surely have looked the fool compared to the others."
"Oh, come now, I am sure you have some skill. You could not have been worse than Corunir, who somehow managed to trip himself and landed flat on his back. It may have had something to do with the amount of wine he had consumed," I replied with a small laugh, hoping for one in return.
Unfortunately, he remained serious, and I waited as patiently as I could for him to speak again. Finally, he said quietly, "You were very graceful dancing with Lord Glorfindel. You make a fine pair."
My jaw dropped open slightly, but I snapped it shut with effort. "Ah, well thank you, but he was just being kind."
"He looked to be feeling more than kindness for you, in my observation," he replied, and I detected a note of bitterness. "You seemed to be enjoying his attentions."
Realizing what he was implying, I became annoyed, "Perhaps I was."
His eyes narrowed as he finally looked at me, and I could clearly see the jealousy shimmering in them, "Perhaps you should return to his side, he must be missing you."
I could feel angry tears gathering in my eyes but I blinked them away and turned my back on him so he couldn't see. "Perhaps I shall." I said evenly, and resolutely left the patio without looking back.
His eyes were burning holes into my back even after the door was closed.
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Instead of returning to the Hall of Fire, I slowly made my way up to the second floor and opened the door to my room tiredly. I went around and lit some candles and threw open the doors of my balcony for some added moonlight, before taking an empty glass and filling it with some wine from a carafe. I sent a prayer of thanks to whoever had put it there; after such an emotional exchange, I felt the need for another drink.
I sat on the bed, sinking slightly into its softness, and tried not to think about how defeated I felt. It seemed like I squandered a key opportunity to make things right; while it was true it was not my fault Candaith was seemingly unreceptive to my attempts, I had not made things easier by my actions. I had let my anger drive my words, which in turn hurt him.
After taking a few sips of the wine, I set the glass back on the table and sat in front of the mirror. I slowly removed the clips, and observed my reflection once more. The Elleth I saw looking back at me had little of the youthful excitement from earlier; she just looked sad, and tired. I ran a hand through my hair, jolting a little as I hit a snag. Carefully I took the comb and removed the tangles resulting from the hours of dancing. The dress still looked beautiful but was a little crumpled in places, and I idly noted it would need to be ironed.
I reached around to try and undo the laces but found I could not reach. Sighing in frustration, I decided to seek out someone to help; I knew the maids were likely nearby.
As I rose to leave, I heard a soft knock. Assuming it was a maid who noticed me enter my room, I said, "Come in." After hearing no response and the door remaining closed, I made my way over and opened it myself; perhaps the person had accidentally knocked on the wrong one.
I was surprised to see the contrite face of Candaith looking back at me.
We both stood staring at each other for a moment, my hand frozen on the door handle, and his arms crossed behind his back. Finally, I found my words and said, "Come in." I stepped aside and he entered the room, looking around. I closed the door softly and had the presence of mind to offer him a beverage, "Would you like some wine?"
He shook his head, and I set the carafe down. Unsure what to do, I wandered out onto the balcony and inhaled the fresh air. It overlooked the river, and the stars were twinkling brightly as always. I heard him follow and he stood next to me, leaning his arms against the railing. I decided to wait for him to speak, as he was the one who had shown up at my door and likely had something he wished to say.
He cleared his throat. "I must apologize for my behavior tonight. It was inappropriate and hurtful." I nodded, and he continued, "I have been keeping my distance lately, and you are likely wondering why."
"Yes…I know when we spoke in Tham Send, we argued about my presence in the group of Dunedain. You wish for me to stay behind," I said softly.
"I do," he replied, but forestalled my next words by saying, "But I understand now, that you cannot do so. You feel passionate about protecting everyone from those who wish to harm them, and desire to see justice brought upon the forces of evil. You also care for Aragorn and want to help him succeed."
I turned to look at him, pleased at his admission, "Thank you for understanding."
Candaith continued, "Wanting to protect you is not something I can control…but I know you can handle yourself well, and likely do not need my protection, as you said."
"Perhaps, but I would never deprive you of the opportunity to be my prince in shining armor," I said, trying to lighten the mood. He turned to me and raised an eyebrow, eliciting a smile on my face.
"Gwinthilnel I am trying to be serious."
"And I am trying to make you laugh," I replied, "Am I succeeding?"
A chuckle escaped his lips, and it made me feel warm inside.
We continued to stand together for a little while, now in a more comfortable silence. The air was becoming chilly, and I inadvertently shivered. "Are you cold?" Candaith asked, concerned.
I shrugged, "Just a little."
"Perhaps we should go inside?" he asked.
Reluctant to leave the starlight, I replied softly, "Perhaps I could borrow your cloak instead?" Inwardly, I was surprised at my somewhat flirtatious actions, and hoped he wasn't averse to them.
He smiled and proceeded to remove his cloak, and he threw it around me, clasping it on my neck. I felt his fingers accidentally touch my skin, and it feel tingly.
We sat ourselves down on a bench, and I told him some short stories about my childhood obsession with the stars. "My mother would be searching for me everywhere, and eventually find me on my back in the tall grass, staring at the sky. 'Gwinthilnel,' she would scold, 'The grass grows so high that I cannot see you. Please tell me where you are going before wandering off in the dark!' My father would just laugh and wink at me; he was always my secret conspirator." I smiled fondly, the memories bringing me both comfort and pain. "I miss them."
Candaith hesitated, before reaching out and gently squeezing my hand, and our fingers intertwined. I tried not to read too much into it, but this small action meant so much to me. "Of course you do, they are your family. I miss my family too, even though they are not so far away as yours." I noticed him looking at our joined hands, and wondered what he was thinking. "We are different in many ways, but in others we are much the same," he murmured softly.
A soft "Hm" of acknowledgment came from me, and after noting the lateness of the hour, I stood and said, "It is late, and we have an early start tomorrow."
"Ah yes, it would be prudent to retire," he replied, rising but making no motion to go inside. He was looking at me with some intensity, and I felt a blush creep up my cheeks.
"Yes…it would be," my voice sounded breathy. I was not sure what he was implying, if anything, but it made me shiver, and not from the cold.
Letting my nerves get the best of me, I let go of his hand, "Let's go inside," I said, and I mentally cursed as I noticed how fast I was speaking.
He followed me through the door to the balcony, and as I turned to look at him, a calm mask had slid over his face, but it was unable to hide what looked like disappointment in his eyes. "I will take my leave," he said softly, but as he turned to go, I said, before I could really think about it, "Could you help me with something?"
Turning back around with a questioning look, I motioned to the back of my dress. "The laces on these things are almost impossible to untie, and it could take some time to track down a maid to help me at this late hour." My face was likely flaming but I plowed on, "Would you…" my voice finally failed me, but he seemed to understand.
"Would I help loosen them for you?" he finished, a faint blush on his cheeks.
"Only if you are comfortable; I can try on my own-"
"No…no, I am here and if it is easier for you, I will help." I unclasped his cloak and set it aside, suddenly feeling hot.
Then I slowly turned around, with my back facing him, and he tentatively approached. Moving my hair gently so it was out of the way, I felt his calloused fingers between my shoulder blades, starting to undo the ties. I was trying to breathe normally, but was having trouble due to his close proximity and how his touch felt warm .
As he made his way down, I thought I could sense a rising tension in the air, but it was not an unpleasant one. We were not speaking, and all that could be heard was the rumble of the distant waterfalls and the strangely amplified sound of our breathing.
Once he had finished, he did not pull away immediately. He seemed to be considering something. I had just gone to turn back around, but something unexpected happened. I was shocked and barely held in a gasp when he murmured, right next to my sensitive ear, "Your skin is very smooth."
"Thank you," I replied, my voice shaking slightly. Could he tell how he affected me?
"Except for these," he said sadly, tracing some of the scars on my back with his fingers. Before I could find something to say in reply, he continued, "Though they are not smooth, they are something to be proud of; they are beautiful."
I smiled and my heart fluttered. My breath hitched as his arms slid around my waist from behind, and he pulled me close to his chest. I could feel the stubble on his cheek tickle mine, and his hot breath was on my neck. I could not believe this was happening. If I tilted my head just slightly...
I felt like the next moment could change everything.
As if he could read my mind, his fingers gently tilted my chin up towards his face, and it felt like both a second and an eternity before our lips finally met.
It was hesitant at first, and we broke away quickly. I looked into his eyes, and he was silently asking permission to continue. For a brief moment, I considered what we were doing. He was a Man, and I was of Elfkind. This kind of relationship would end in heartbreak, one way or another. Yet, I knew in my heart that this was bigger than attraction, at least for me. It could be something wonderful, and living the rest of my life pretending I didn't want this would be torture.
Making up my mind, I turned myself fully around to face him, wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him back into a kiss, a longer one this time. I sighed in pleasure as I felt his fingers threading into my hair, his other hand blazing hot on my bare lower back.
He moved his lips away from mine, and I whimpered as he trailed kisses down my jawline. When his lips met the delicate tip of my ear I moaned, the sensation overwhelming. How he knew that was such an erogenous place on an Elf I hadn't a clue; perhaps it was just a lucky guess. I had little time to think on it as he continued down my neck and then onto my mostly bare shoulders. I didn't know what to do with my hands, so I put them on his chest, my fingers grasping at the fabric tightly when he moved onto my other ear; I felt like my knees were about to give out. I dimly noted my dress sliding down my body, and it hit the ground. I had a shift on underneath, but it left little to the imagination.
Candaith brought his lips back to mine, and the kissing became more intense. My body was flush against his, and something hot was coiling tightly inside me. I put my hands under the back of his shirt and scraped my nails against his skin, and I smiled against his lips at his growl of pleasure. Finding the presence of his shirt unnecessary, I helped pull it off, and I ran my hands over the defined muscles on his chest and abs. I jumped up and wrapped my legs around his hips and he backed me up against a wall. We accidentally knocked into a side table, causing one of the mugs to fall to the floor with a crash…
…and Candaith, suddenly more aware of what was happening, slowly stopped kissing me and set me on my feet. "Gwin, we must stop before we do something we regret," he said softly, putting his forehead against mine.
I would not regret it, I wanted to say. However, I kept this idea to myself. We were both breathing hard, and my thoughts were still scattered by what had just happened.
Almost as if he could read my mind, he pulled me gently against him in a warm embrace, kissing my hair. "We should take time to discuss what this means and how we feel before things go any further," he replied. He was right; we both needed to process this and consider the implications of this becoming something more…if that was what we both wanted. Did he feel the same as I did? I nodded into his shoulder without saying anything, and we pulled apart. When we would have time to have such a conversation was a concern of mine; once we were on the road, there would be little time to be alone.
I found a robe and threw it around my shoulders, and Candaith redressed in his shirt. We looked at each other and smiled, and all I wanted was continue what we had been doing. Instead, he softly kissed me once more and said goodnight. We would be seeing each other in just a few hours, and I knew any sort of rest would not come for me this night as I reflected on the evening I just had.
Well that escalated quickly! One minute we were just talking, and the next we were wrapped up in each other, kissing madly and my body filled with desire so intense I thought I would drown in it. It had been risky for him to initiate what happened; it could have gone either way. My intuition had been telling me that there was something there, but I knew if he felt nothing more than friendship, he would have unlaced the dress and left. I had been trying to ignore the increase in my attraction to him, and whenever I would find myself analyzing why I cared so much about his safety and our relationship, I would shut down the train of thought. I think I was afraid to acknowledge that there was something more romantic possibly going on between us.
Wide awake, I found myself on the balcony once more. The cool air on my face was fanning the flames of desire still inside of me, and my heartrate slowed down to normal. I knew there was much more to think about, and that engaging in a relationship with a mortal man was frowned upon. Arwen was a dear friend of mine, but her father was clearly devastated by her choice to be with Aragorn instead of sailing with him. As a peredhil, or half-Elf, she had the choice of a mortal life. This meant that when they both died, they would be together. If…when Candaith were to die, we would be parted until the ending of the world. I pushed this thought away; I refused to let myself fall into melancholy after the happiness I had felt.
In the blink of an eye, I looked up and saw the very beginnings of the sun rising over the cliffs. I sighed, and realizing I was still in my robe and shift, decided to gather my things, change, and head down to the dining hall for a meal before we left.
My time in Imladris felt like a dream, and I would be sad to leave. Even so, I knew I needed to continue on, despite the misgivings of Candaith. I owed it to Aragorn to help him however I could.
Finally some lovin' between Candaith and Gwin! I really haven't written any love scenes before so I hope it was ok! Thanks for reading, and leave a review if you'd like!