Here we learn more about Halbarad's dream, and meet some of the people of Tur Morva. Enjoy!

Chapter 97

The first person to greet me was Halbarad, who had made it to the barricade with many of the other Dunedain. We clasped arms in a warrior's embrace, and I asked him to explain more about this dream he had.

"Normally I do not take stock in dreams, as I have found them to be unreliable, and most likely the results of our own thoughts. However, this one was different," he began, his arms crossed as he stood in thought. "It was crystal clear, like it was happening in real life. It became obvious to me that it depicted what could have happened, should I and the others have stayed back in Eastern Pren Gwydh." Halbarad looked troubled, and it made a shiver run down my spine.

It seemed like he did not wish to continue, but after a time, I coaxed him to keep going, "What happened next, mellon nin?" I asked softly.

His gaze snapped to mine, and I realized he had been deep in thought. "I stood as if from a far distance, and I could overhear a conversation between you and Elrohir, high up on the hill from which you began your assault." Halbarad proceeded to quote this dream conversation, and my breath hitched as I realized it was word-for-word what we had said. The only difference was that instead of listening to Elrohir's suggestion regarding speaking to the others for more input, I decided on my own that we would engage the enemy. "Elrohir seemed uneasy with your decision, but he and the rest of you did as instructed, despite any misgivings."

"I sense the battle went ill?" I asked, feeling my stomach sink.

He nodded reluctantly. "After your arrows were all used, and you went down the path to the ground, you were overrun almost immediately." He looked away from me, clearly emotional but trying not to let me see it. "Everyone perished…and I could do nothing but watch as you were cut down, one by one." The thought of this having come to pass made my blood feel like it was freezing in my veins, and I barely felt it as Candaith took my hand in his. "I realized it must have been a direct warning from some higher power, so I did not hesitate to follow its unspoken direction to join you here, at the barricade."

"Do you have any idea who sent you the dream?" Elrohir asked curiously.

Halbarad shook his head, "No voices were present except you and Elrohir...and mine, I suppose, as I tried to stop you."

My thoughts were racing. Would I have made such a poor choice, without some sort of divine intervention? Part of me wanted to believe I would listen to the others, and that we would have decided not to try and engage the enemy without help…but another part feared my emotions would have gotten in the way of logic. Would Elrohir and the rest have simply done what I asked, and gone into battle even with their doubts?

Before my thoughts could spiral out of control, Candaith spoke up. "Whoever gave you the message, we are glad of it." He squeezed my hand, and my slightly panicked eyes met his calm ones. "Try not to dwell on things that did not happen, for we succeeded. Now we can continue forward and see how we can aid the people of Tur Morva." With this, he tugged me along, and Halbarad led the way as we joined the others. As we walked, I took some deep, cleansing breaths, and felt some of the panic seep away from me. It was just a dream…I never made that decision. I kept telling myself this over and over, and Candaith's calming presence helped bring me a little peace. However, the creeping doubts lingered, but I tried to shove them into the dark corner I put all of the things I do not wish to deal with. Not a permanent solution, by any means, but a necessary one.

I was pleased to learn none of our group was killed, and the injuries, while present, were not grave. Elladan and Elrohir were helping Calenglad patch them up, although the twins did take a moment to hug me briefly, grateful I came out of the battle with only a few scratches. Nona was speaking with the Dunlendings who remained, and waved Halbarad and I over. She was standing next to a tall, imposing man. He was bald, with many intricately painted markings on his skin, and his dark eyes were hard as they appraised me. "Gwinthilnel, let me introduce you to Léolin," Nona said. "He is a high-ranking Captain, and was with those of the Falcon Clan who came down from Tur Morva to join the fight against the barricade."

Before I could greet him, Léolin said gruffly, "We are the Hebog-lûth, and have little trust of Duvodiad, especially Elichthi." His eyes narrowed, and I saw suspicion in this gaze. "Why do you come here?"

I took a cleansing breath and bit back a rude retort. We just saved your lives and this is the thanks we get? "We got word your people were shut in behind a barricade of enemies, and decided that we could provide help to eliminate them."

"Who's to say we needed your help?" he sneered, and I was astonished at his rudeness. "As you saw, our warriors assailed the enemy, and likely would have succeeded in destroying them, with or without your help."

"Be that as it may," I said shortly, my temper barely in check. "You are safe now. If you do not want our help in any other way, we will depart your lands and move on, but we offer aid to you freely, and expect nothing in return." I looked to Halbarad, and he nodded slightly in agreement.

"Nothing?" Léolin replied skeptically. "Rarely do people offer help without desiring something in return."

Halbarad stepped in now, being the leader of our group, "Perhaps we could speak to your Brenin? Or do you act as his proxy in these matters?"

Léolin eyed Halbarad in thought, and it took a moment before he said, "Although I do not trust you, I will do as you ask, and bring you to Lheu Brenin. However," he moved closer, and I noticed Candaith step slightly in front of me. Léolin rolled his eyes and looked unimpressed. "If you prove false, do not expect my people to treat you with anything but hostility."

"We will not prove false, I assure you," Halbarad said placatingly, and I tried to relax my shoulders, which were tense from my body automatically preparing itself for a fight. Candaith was still in front of me, and I put a hand on his lower back gently. "Let us both calm down, meleth nin." He was as taut as a bowstring, his fingers brushing the hilt of the dagger he kept hidden under his cloak. "I do not trust him Gwin. We should keep our guard up around him." I 'nodded' internally and forced myself to appear more relaxed and at ease. Léolin gave me one more searching look before turning and stalking away. I would let Halbarad work out the details.

All I truly wanted right now was some alone time with Candaith to decompress and be comforted, but alas, there was much to do. I watched Nona, who had slipped away during our conversation with Léolin, gather up all the Dunlendings who would be returning to Tur Morva and make sure they were ready to depart. I had a feeling she was anxious to get involved in helping them in any way she could. She always wanted to feel useful, and seemed to forever be searching for some purpose. I wanted to tell her there was no need for her to prove her worth, but she would likely not be dissuaded from her crusade to right all the wrongs of her people. Although…it made me a bit of a hypocrite, for I felt like it was my duty to defeat any evil which threatened Arda. I had to admit I couldn't fix everything and save everyone, to my chagrin.

I volunteered to help deal with the dead orcs and other foul creatures, and was gently but insistently told it wasn't necessary and that they had plenty already assigned to the task. Secretly I was relieved, but felt I at least should make the offer. Instead I decided to help Lothrandir and Culang pass around some food to the rest of the Dunedain, as everyone was likely hungry after such a tiring battle. It wasn't much, but we had some jerky and dried fruit, and I had found some wild mushrooms that Lothrandir fried up quickly in large batches, which was a big hit. It had me thinking fondly of Merry and Pippin, who I remembered would load their plates with them in Imladris. I hoped they were alive and well.

After everyone was taken care of, I met up with Halbarad again so we could discuss the plan. "We will rest here tonight before moving with Léolin and the others of the Hebog-lûth north towards Tur Morva." He looked sadly at the Dunlending group, who were gathered around small fires, huddled in their animal furs. "They lost many warriors, even in the short time they fought in the battle. It will be grim tidings to bear home."

"Will they bury their bodies here, or carry them back?" I asked quietly.

Halbarad pointed across the road, and I could now see a large cairn being built. "They decided to bury their dead here, as a sign of remembrance of the battle in which they fought for their homeland."

I nodded, "It is a fitting place for them to rest. I hope their souls find peace," I whispered. Shaking myself out of melancholic thoughts, I refocused my attention back on our plans. "Did Léolin tell you anything about Lheu Brenin?"

The ranger sighed, "He did not seem very inclined to speak to me at all, but one of the women rebuked him in Dunlendish, which seemed to set him straight a bit." A small smile graced his grizzled face. "It was quite amusing, to tell you the truth. Anyway, it sounds like the Brenin is stern but fair, and will be open to listening to our offer of aid."

"We cannot stay overly long…" I began to say.

Halbarad agreed, "Our mission is to reach Aragorn, but I wish to help in a small way, if we might." He gave me a curious smile. "Gwin, I think your nature of helping everyone you come across is rubbing off on me."

I scowled and shoved him lightly, but couldn't keep the grin off of my face for long. "At least I can now say I have provided some measure of a positive influence over the rest of you." This made him laugh, and I marveled at how it made him look younger.

The plan was to help them get back on their feet a bit, so they would be able to defend themselves adequately if Saruman's forces were to attempt an attack directly on the city. They would be a key ally in the fight against the wizard and his forces. I was mentally cataloguing the things they might need, and would get a better sense of the state of their defenses once we arrived. Halbarad, being used to living in Esteldin and seeing to the defense of the large city, would be a good person to defer to in this task.

Finally, after a long day of organizing and getting things settled for tomorrow, I just about threw myself onto my palette in Candaith and I's tent, and he chuckled at my antics. "Can I help you with your clothes, my lady?"

I was lying on my stomach, and opened one eye to look up at him. "Are you trying to seduce me, my lord?" He chuckled and winked, and I had no qualms accepting his 'help' with getting undressed. I was more than happy to do the same for him.

After engaging in some very pleasurable activities, we stayed up a little later than we should have, just talking. It was nice to share my thoughts and concerns about things, especially after hearing of Halbarad's dream. "Do you…do you think I would have made such a rash decision?" I whispered, almost afraid to say it out loud.

Candaith pulled me a little closer, and I settled myself on his chest as he ran his fingers through my hair. "I think it is a waste of energy for us to dwell on something which never happened, meleth nin. It was not the decision you made."

"I could have gotten you all killed," I replied softly.

"Gwin, you had the discussion with Elrohir before we even knew Halbarad was coming," Candaith insisted. "We cannot know if the dream would have held true; perhaps it was simply a way to get Halbarad and the others to come, to provide more warriors and lead to less injury and death overall."

I sighed, "Maybe you are right; I will try to put this behind me." I was not sure how convincing I sounded, for Candaith tipped my chin up to look at him, and his brow was furrowed in concern. "Truly, I will be fine; do not worry for me."

At this, he gave me a rueful smile, "I will always worry for you, meleth nin, whether you like it or not." He kissed me softly, and I melted into it, before settling myself on his chest once more. He was now playing with my hair absentmindedly, clearly in thought. "I wonder how long we will be staying in Tur Morva."

I shrugged, "It is hard to say, but we cannot tarry long. I want to help them, as I know what it is like to struggle with hunger and feel defenseless, but Aragorn needs us." I had never told Candaith about my past in Mirkwood, and decided that perhaps tonight would be a good time. My mind was still busy, and I knew sleep would not come until I shared this with him. I readjusted so we were sitting and looking at one another, settling myself in his lap. He looked at me curiously, but I could tell he was holding back on asking me anything. It made me sad to see it, and I knew it was my fault. "Candaith, sharing things in my past…it has always been difficult for me. Even things which happened a millenia ago still sometimes feel like it was only yesterday."

He nodded and kissed my forehead. "I know."

After a few moments, I raised my eyes to his and took a deep breath. "I joined the Guard because things were becoming dangerous in Mirkwood. My family and I lived in a cottage near a small village. In happier times, we were safe there. After my brothers and father died," I took another shaky breath, pushing away the old grief, before continuing. "It was just my mother, my sister, and I left in our home. There were wargs, giant spiders, and even goblins prowling the forest. I had to protect my family, so I set aside my musical dreams and did what needed to be done."

"Were many of you in the Guard in your village?" Candaith asked, interlacing his fingers with mine.

"Our village was small, and we would go to train often in Felegoth, which is the capital. However, there were not many of us, and there were no walls or anything to keep the monsters out." I sighed. "The enemy made it difficult to gather fresh water, or even go to the market and trade for food. We had a vegetable garden, but couldn't afford livestock, and hunting was too dangerous. It was a struggle to survive."

"Why did you not decide to move closer to Felegoth, where it was safer?" he replied, and I felt a flash of frustration at my mother for her stubbornness. "It sounds like you were in danger every day."

"It was not always so perilous, and my mother felt a strong connection to our home because of my father and brothers. She did not want to leave a place with such fond memories," I whispered. "Yet, we did leave, but not by choice." I then told him the story of how our home was destroyed, and we were forced to move to Felegoth. "We had dwelt in the capital for only a short time before my mother and sister sailed. She could no longer bear to be parted from my father, despite not knowing if he was even released from the Halls of Mandos, and my sister wanted to stay with my mother. Melweth was so young; I wish she had decided to remain with me. There is so much she could have experienced here, and I would have kept her safe."

Candaith squeezed my hands, and I noticed they were trembling. "So you were left all alone?"

"I was an adult, and needed to grow up in order to fight against the enemies of our realm," I said tonelessly. "I was not ready to sail, so I decided to stay."

There was a pause where neither of us spoke, and I was unsure what else to say. There was so much more I could tell him, but even sharing this one story was very draining. Candaith seemed to sense this, and pulled me close. "Well, I personally am glad you stayed, for otherwise we never would have met."

This made me smile, "That is true." I looked into his expressive blue eyes, and could not imagine what my life would have been like without him. "I am glad to be here with you, Candaith."

He gave me a beautiful smile, and it made my heart fill up with joy. "Me too, Gwin." With that, he kissed me, and we expressed our love for one another without the need for words.

Gwin is struggling with her doubts about her ability to make good decisions, and doesn't want to deal with any of the things which trouble her. By keeping these hurts locked away, she only delays facing them. Will this come back to haunt her? We shall see! Next chapter we head into Tur Morva, as we begin the next arc of this story. Hope you liked the chapter, and leave a review!