TW - sexual abuse strongly hinted at.
Monica shook me awake "come on" she whispered and heaved me out of bed. "Is that our Halloween candy?" Debbie asked when we got to the couch "who wants candy corn?" Frank asked. Carl and Liam were with him. "Me!" Carl said, I grabbed a handful. "Movie night" Monica said. "We have school in the morning" Debbie whined. I hit her arm "paranormal activity 3!" Carl said as he watched Frank load the dvd player. "My buddy Edgar shot this at the amc" Frank said. We all sat on the couch and watched it start "why is it so shaky?" Carl asked "ah, Edgar's got palsy" Frank said. "it's rated R" Debbie said, I slapped her again. "For really fucking scary" Monica said "so sit there and learn" Frank said as he lit a joint. "I'm gonna get Fiona" Debbie said, "Debbie, Jesus you suck" I said. "Shut up Lucy" Debbie snapped and slapped me, I slapped her back "hey, at least throw punches if you're going to fight" Frank said and dragged me onto his lap. "This is gonna be our little secret" Monica said and took the joint off Frank. Everyone fell asleep, I stayed up to the end then woke them all up.
—
I ran into Fiona's room and stuck a gummy snake in her mouth "good morning!" I said to her and pulled back her eye mask. She squatted me away "what have I told you about candy in the morning?" She moaned. I laughed and took of downstairs. Monica was at the table feeding Liam. "Morning sweetie" she said. "Morning" I replied. I went over and poured a cup of coffee then sat at the table. "I'd trade my left nut for one more hour of sleep" Carl moaned as he came down the stairs with Debbie and Fiona. "You're gonna be late for school" Fiona said "hey, I hope you're hungry. Most important meal of the day" Monica said. Carl and Debbie both looked awful. "Sit" Monica told them, they both thumped down on their seats. "Weak" I told them. "The house could use a spring clean" Monica said "it's November" fi said from the kitchen "it's like dawn of the dead in here, what's with you guys" fi said "can we watch that tonight?" I asked and bounced up and down on my chair then got another handful of candy from my pocket. "Debbie, can you get your father up?" Monica asked. "You've got music lessons after school and a pile of homework to get through Lucy" Fi told me. "Who's taking me?" I asked and gulped down my coffee and ran into the kitchen "more please" I said and put the cup on the bench. "I'll take you" fi said and kissed the top of my head then poured a bit of coffee in my cup. "No I can take her" Monica said "no you can't you'll forget" I said, "I would never forget you Lucy" Monica said. I rolled my eyes and looked up at Fiona "more then that," "no Lucy, do you want milk?" She said "no, I don't need milk or sugar anymore" "you drink this shit straight?" fi asked, "yep." Monica came over to us "why don't you go for a run? When's the last time you did that?" she asked Fi. "I've got too much to do" Fi said. "Like?" "Uh, make lunches, get Liam dressed, take him for his check-up" Fi said. "Made lunches already, I'm here, it doesn't all have to fall on you. I'm doing better, I promise" Monica told her. Fiona looked in one of the bags. "I've been working on the lunch lady, think she might let us have school lunches again soon" I told Fi, she smiled at me. "Go eat something other than candy for breakfast" she said and pushed me out of the kitchen. Carl had fallen asleep on the table, Monica was waking him up. "Ok if you're not gonna eat I want your teeth brushed in two minutes. Come on. Wear this" she told him. "You febreze it first?" Fi yelled out. "Washed it last night" Monica said and went over to her. "Why don't you go for a run? You used to go for six mile runs before school all the time." Fionas phone rang, "Steve? Is lip ok?" She said then left. "Is it good?" Monica asked me "I prefer candy" I said. "Maybe I could put candy in the pancakes?" she said. "Could be on a winner there" I said.
"What the hell?" I said as Monica got out of a car. "Look what we got!" She yelled. "Get in you brat!" Frank yelled out the window. I got in the back seat. Liam was sitting on the floor. "It took 6 security guards to get us out of there" Frank said far to loudly as Monica drove. "It took three just to climb over the rail and get you away from that zebra" Monica laughed "I thought it was a unicorn. I swear I saw a horn… what were we on?" Frank said. "Hit me!" Monica said. Frank pulled out some bags "oxy or bennies?" He asked. "Bennie!" Monica yelled, "Bennie? There you go" he said and they both downed a pill with some beer. "Really? How the fuck did you even afford all that?" I asked. Frank touched the side of his nose.
"Just drop me off at bartelme park" I told them. Monica pulled into the parking spot way to fast and hit the car next to us. I got out and grabbed Liam too. "Hey, what the hell are you doing?" Frank yelled and they both got out after me. "Liam wants to play at the park while I go to class" I said. "Park!" Liam yelled. "See" I said. Monica grabbed him off me. "Come with us too Lucy" she said. "I've got a lesson" "so skip it, since when are you such a loser" Frank said "Frank! Do not call my beautiful daughter a loser" Monica said and slapped him on the arm. I ran off while they were distracted.
I managed to sneak out after my lesson without anyone noticing and headed to the park. The cops were there. "They stole that women's bag, pissed down the slide and left with a black baby" a guy said.
Monica was darting around the house when I got home. "How was your lesson?" she asked me. "The one you left me at?" I said and chucked my bag and coat onto the floor. "I know but the cops showed up and we needed to get out of there, I left you a note" she said. "What? There was no note" I said confused. "On the seat" she said as she headed into the kitchen. "Dinners nearly ready, you practice for your big competition this weekend" she yelled from the kitchen. I picked my coat back up and left.
—
I walked into V and Kevs house. V was standing in the kitchen, she looked sad. I ran up to her and gave her a hug. "Do you want to talk?" I asked her. She laughed. "Sweet, little Gallagher" she said and walked over to the couch. I went and snuggled in next to her. "I won't tell anyone if it's a secret" I said. "It's grown-up stuff" she said "well that's a bullshit reason, you need someone and I'm right here" "can we just cuddle?" She asked. I wrapped my arms around her middle. After a while she whispered "I probably can't have kids." "You want kids?" I asked. "Yeah, Kev and I have been trying to make a baby but the doctor says it's unlikely I'll get pregnant." "Shit, that sucks" I said and squeezed her tighter. "Then I told Kev I didn't want kids any way and he got upset and punched the wall," "you lied?" "Maybe"
Frank stormed into the lounge room and grabbed the blanket off the couch. "Monica!" He yelled completely ignoring me at the piano. "I'm in here!" Monica yelled from the kitchen. I stopped playing so I could listen in. "I'm replacing the shelf paper. It's gonna look great in here" she said. "What?" She said after a pause. "You wanna apologise?" Frank yelled, "for what?" "For leaving me in fucking Indiana somewhere" "I should've hit you with the car" "walked 10, 15 miles" "you must be tired" "froze my arse off" "how about a bath? I'll run you a bath, and then after we can do what we do best" "we don't have an eightball" "not that" "sex?" "A kid. Oh, Frank, let's do it. Who are we to deny the world another shining Gallagher star? We had one kid on E, Debbie" "that was Carl" "No, Carl was shrooms" "thought Liam was mushies" "Liam was nitro, don't you remember? Debbie was E, on Christmas Eve. I got a bag of pills from that bail-bond guy, they had little Christmas trees on them. We had our own little rave" Monica said. "Until the kids came down asking for fucking presents" Frank said. "Lucy was LSD, but we have never made a little rugrat on GHB" They started kissing and stumbled towards the stairs. "You have got to be kidding me! You aren't even looking after the ones you have! You are the most selfish and stupid people I know!" I screamed at them and ran out of the house.
"Sulking about the competition again?" Hanna asked as I ran up to them on the playground. "Fucking Monica wants another kid" I said. "Damn she is crazy" Zuri said. I nodded. "Don't worry she's too old to get knocked up" Cindi said. "Really?" I asked. "Yeah, you don't see old chicks pregnant do ya?" I relaxed a bit. "I still want to smash shit up" I told them. "Think there's an abandoned car near my place" Hanna said with a smirk.
Fi and V were drinking on the front porch, I quickly ducked behind a scrub then made my way down the side of the neighbours house and headed for the backyard. The house was quiet, I could hear V and Fi talking out the front door. I headed up stairs.
—
I leapt over Frank who was passed out in the hallway. ''V!" I yelled and hugged her. "Shhh" she told me and stumbled into the bathroom. "Thanks for letting me talk your ear off last night Fi" she said but only Debbie was in there. "I'll tell her when she gets back" Debbie said. I pushed Debbie away from the sink and grabbed my toothbrush. "Lucy!" She yelled and slapped my back. "Where the hell has she gone this early?" V mumbled to herself then said "I'll see you later girls" and walked off. "Bye V" I yelled and spat toothpaste everywhere. I stepped over Frank again and headed downstairs, Monica and Carl were moving the couch to the side of the room. I ran into the kitchen completely ignoring Monica's good mornings, grabbed a pop tart and left. I didn't want to deal with Monica. "Hey!" Fiona yelled out, she was running down the street. I stopped and she came over "did you have breakfast?" She asked. I held up my pop tart. "Ok, I'll see you after school ok?" I nodded.
I dashed into the Kash and grab. Ian was restocking the shelves, Lip was watching him. "Lip!" I yelled out and gave him a big hug, he hugged me back. "Hey kid, shouldn't you be in school?" He said. "I'm getting there" I mumbled. "How's the ritz?" I asked Lip. "Enjoying the view while it lasts" he said with a smirk. "Anything cheap I can eat?" I asked Ian. He wondered down an isle and grabbed me a few things. "Not having breakfast at home?" Lip asked. "Monica's cleaning" I told him. "Cleaning? Shit" he said. Ian passed me some waffles, cereal bars and chocolate. I grabbed a 5 out of my pants and went to leave. "Hey, good luck with the comp this weekend" Lip said with a smile. I glared at him. "You still don't want to do it? $200 prize money?" he said. I just continued to glare at him. "Luce, just don't go if you don't want to" Ian said. Lip slapped his arm, "bro, it's a good opportunity for her" Lip said. "Says the genius who isn't even finishing high school" Ian teased. I left.
Fiona and I had to stand on the bus ride home. "Do you like that Monica is home?" I asked her. "I don't know, maybe. She's trying really hard" Fi said. "Was she like this when you were little?' Fi chuckled "mostly more crazy, at least she's around and there are nice moments right?" "Is she going to stay?" "She said she is" "Lip doesn't think she will" "you spoke to Lip?" "Yeah before school at the Kash and Grab" "is he ok?" "Yeah he is Lip" "yeah" "Fiona?" I asked after a pause, she looked at me. "I really don't want to do this competition" I told her again. "Lucy" she sighed. "Is it because you're worried you will lose? Because if your last recital is anything to go off you have nothing to worry about" Fi said and put a hand on my shoulder. "Monica's right, it will be good exposure and the prize money won't hurt" she added.
"Wow, that's a lot of dolls" I said to Debbie as I walked into our room, they were still in the boxes and piled on the desk and against the wall. "Monica, she wouldn't stop buying them" Debbie sighed. "She's really high, does she even sleep? It's weird" I said. "She's just trying to be a good mom, I think that's all anyway" Debbie said but didn't sound too sure. We shared a look.
—
I woke up at 4am and considered leaving that early. I looked out the window, it was windy and raining. I made sure my clothes were ready so I could get dressed and run out of there as fast as I could once the rain stopped. No way was I going to that piano competition, I would get up before Monica and spend the day out of the house.
Monica woke me up and hurried me into the car with Liam, she didn't let me out of her sight. "Please Monica, I don't want to do this" I begged her, but she wasn't listening. "Lets go out for breakfast before the competition!" she said. We ate, she constantly talk while I didn't say a word. It was the same in the car and while I waited my turn, most of what she was saying didn't even make sense and she would repeat the same thing over and over. My name was called out.
"Monica, can we go please" I begged her as I tugged on her hand. "The mayor is coming Lucy, this is important. Look at him smiling at you" she said. I had already noticed that smile, it made me feel sick. "Please" I begged one last time, Monica shook her hand free of mine and went to shake the Mayors hand.
"Isn't he just the nicest! Offering you a ride home and everything. What a great man. You need to take advantage of this Lucy, he is clearly impressed with your talent and impressing guys like him means something. It's how people like us go places. You did so so well my beautiful girl, you are so special. He sees that, I know he does" she rambled as she fiddled with my dress. "I'm sorry I can't stay but I promised Carl … you will be right. He will take care of you. I can't wait to see that trophy when you get home. My gorgeous Lucy. You are so beautiful. Look at everyone noticing you. I'm so proud" she continued. She was interrupted by the host asking all contestants to line up on the stage. I calmly walked out.
I won. Monica yelled and jumped around while everyone near by stared at her. I was invited to play another song. I didn't want to. I wanted to run away as fast as I could but I had realised that wasn't going to happen. The way he had looked at me, the way Monica had so easily trusted him with my care still flashed through my head. I sat at the piano and played another song. Then I received the trophy, and the prize money, I shook his hand. People congratulated me and I let myself be led to his car. He didn't join me, I was alone in the backseat. For a moment I thought nothing was going to happen, we were heading towards the Southside, towards home. Then we pulled up at a different house. The driver turned to me, the look he gave me kept me quiet.
Yelling downstairs woke me up. My whole body hurt. I listened to the yelling, it sounded like Lip. There were footsteps on the stairs. "You could've gotten Carl killed!" Fiona yelled. "You tried to get Ian into the Army?!" There was a pause. "You promised me" Fi said quietly. "Get out of bed. Get out of bed, mom!" she screamed. Then there were footsteps on the stairs again. I sat up, it was painful. I quietly went downstairs. Fiona was looking at the mess in the kitchen, her back to me. She started to scream and kicked the washing machine. I backed up to the staircase. She stopped screaming, I could hear her sobbing. I couldn't tell her, I couldn't add to her sadness, I didn't want her to scream like that again. I went back up the stairs and to my bed.
—
The house was clean, Debbie was cooking breakfast, Monica was still in bed and Fiona was in the shower. "I got to drive a car!" Carl boasted, he had some scratches and bruises on his face. I ignored him and grabbed my violin then left.