Hi everyone! Sorry for the late update. Hope everyone is doing well and had a good first month of 2025, hope your resolutions are going well! (You got this!)

If you haven't today, please go drink some water and eat some food.

*Notice!* Big root/Santoff Claussen DO NOT BELONG TO ME! They are the property of the Guardians of Childhood series which Rise of the Guardians is loosely based on by William Joyce (Great series, its for like 5th grade ish but is a comfort book for me.)

With that out of the way, enjoy chapter 9!

Chapter 9: Ahto-what?

Jack was drowning again. Water filled his nose and the icy ocean clung to his skin and clothes pulling him down into the depth below.

Where was Gale? The spirit had only ever once let Jack fall, they had a pattern, a friendship. One that Jack hoped hadn't been forgone just because of his deal with Elsa. The salt stung as Jack forced his eyes open but the winter spirit could barely notice it compared to the fear that took hold of him.

He, he was drowning! There was no more air for him to breathe! Flailing in the deep Jack felt something soft and silky catch his hand but a sharp pain sent his hand away. A swarm of frozen bubbles filled his vision and Jack thought he saw Elsa swimming above him frantically flying to the surface. Clawing at her dress Jack followed her but when he was inches away from holding onto her for dear life something flashed in front of him.

Breaking through the surface Jack took in far too much air for his lungs and coughed wildly as he wrapped himself around Elsa. The queen let out a gasp as Jack wrapped his arms around her shoulders, dragging her into the water below.

Elsa spit out a mouthful of water. "Let go of me!"

Jack didn't. He was too terrified to dare battle these waves himself.

Above the waves and wind Jack could hear neighing. The sound of hooves rushing at him. Charging towards him, echoing above and even underneath his flailing body.

Clutching Elsa tighter Jack watched as something flashed by.

"Where's that horse!" Jack shrieked. Elsa gagged as water flew into her mouth and Jack accidently forced her head below. Hauling her above the water, Jack watched as with a large gust of wind the horse appeared atop a wave.

For a moment the horse just stood, translucent and angry. Then it vanished.

Jack bit back a scream as a wave crashed against them. Too many unpleasant memories were flooding his mind.

Ironic isn't it, you'll die trying to find me. Mary's voice slowly grew in his head taunting him.

It was then, amidst his fear and memories that something rammed into Jack. It knocked the air out of him and sent him flying away from Elsa. Swallowing a mouthful of salt the winter spirit gagged as he kicked his way to the surface.

Wiping at his eyes Jack looked up to see the horse, staring down at him.

"Hi…good pony-I.." Jack didn't get to answer though as the horse took his hood in his mouth and dragged him below. Jack felt his ears pop and his chest tighten as the horse snorted and ran through the water. It was dark and oh so cold.

Clawing at his hoodie Jack tried to throw it off him but the water and pressure had all but glued it to his skin.

Mary was right, Jack was going to die in this ocean! Well, could a spirit die? Sandy had but technically he'd come back. Could Jamie bring him back like he had for Sandy?

The winter spirit snapped back into focus. He didn't necessarily want his last thoughts to be debating if he could die. There wasn't much else to focus on though.

Abruptly though the horse dropped Jack. A stream of bubbles escaped its nose as it snorted in frustration. Pawing in the water the horse stared at Jack. The winter spirit was too terrified to move but also could feel his body reaching its limit. A large swoosh followed by a crack sounded through the sea.

Looking up Jack saw the water part above him.

As the wind pushed the wall of water to the side a wall of ice came down holding it in place. The second Gale touched Jack's skin a large gust of wind swept him up and the ice crumbled.

Jack felt sick as Gale threw him into the air. Regaining his balance Jack looked down to see Elsa standing on a large snowflake shaped ice raft holding his staff.

Landing next to her, Jack immediately crumpled. Sprawling out on his back Jack looked up at the dark clouds above him.

Elsa was staring at him in horror.

"I-are you alright…"

Jack tried to nod but instead just rolled over and vomited into the sea. When Jack managed to look up he saw Nokk inches from his head.

The winter spirit just sighed and lowered his head.

"If it's gonna kill me let it, maybe I'll see Mary quicker then..might speed this up."

"Nokk, enough." Elsa snapped sliding between the two of them, forcing the horse's head away from Jack.

The creature was calm but the storm above raged on. Perhaps it was still angry? Jack shook his head, as long as he wasn't drowning he didn't mind if the horse was mad.

Still being amicable felt like it was a good idea.

"Thank you…thank you sea horse for not killing me.." Jack stammered managing a shaky grimace. The horse snorted and Jack flinched, jumping to his feet.
Inching next to Elsa, Jack leaned in close.

"Can it leave?"

The winter queen scoffed and clambered onto Nokk causing the icy raft to jolt halfway beneath the water. Steadying himself Jack clutched his staff closely.

"He's giving us a ride." Jack opened his mouth in protest but Elsa held up a hand. "No you cannot fly, Nokk is the only one who knows the way to Ahtohallan."

"I'm sure the wind knows how to get there…right Gale?" Jack looked up, expecting a gust of wind to hit him. Not a single breeze blew by. The winter spirit felt oddly vulnerable without his companion.

"He…they…the horse tried to drown me!" Jack shrieked, throwing a hand up. Elsa pursed her lips in thought.

"I..yes, and I apologize. He won't hurt you anymore." Jack blinked and wiped water out of his eyes.

"Then why'd he do it in the first place!"

"He..he doesn't want anyone to find Ahtohallan he didn't know your not...bad"

Jack frowned at the word choice.

Looking over at Elsa, Jack grimaced. She was silently begging him, her icy eyes burning into his. She did look a little bit guilty. And now guilt gnawed at Jack at his faltering thoughts.

Jack looked away wanting to ignore her, but his only other option was to stay here in this sad ocean and with Gale unable to help Jack very much doubted he could swim his way back to shore.

Very begrudgingly Jack climbed up behind Elsa. Jack had to admit he hated this horse. The water he was..floating? Sitting on? Made him feel a bit sick, a bit like he'd fall through at any moment with nothing to grab onto to save himself.

"You said you didn't know how to ride. So for your own sake." Elsa said, and Jack felt something cold slide around his waist. Looking down Jack saw an icy rope securing him to Elsa. Something you would fashion for a child so they didn't hurt themselves when learning. It was a little embarrassing to say the least.

"Thank you. Now as long as I don't die I believe I'll be content."

"I thought spirits couldn't die." Elsa said sharply, rolling her eyes as Nokk cantered off. Jack lurched forward, but caught himself at the last second.

"I-Age doesn't kill me, but no one said anything about drowning, I've done it once after all and I really don't want to do it again."

Much to Elsa's credit she didn't turn around at the comment. Jack had to admit it was impressive, certainly not the reaction he would have had.

The ride was choppy and quiet. Elsa offered no conversation and Jack was busy trying to keep from getting sick again as the Nokk jumped from wave to wave. The storm was still raging on above but Elsa seemed to have the horse in line as it obeyed her every movement.

Jack was soaked now and he could have sworn Elsa was riding them into every wave she could but eventually the rain cleared. And in its place snow fell. The sight was such an odd thing that Jack didn't register it for a second until the thick clumps of white landed on his lashes.

Breathing deeply Jack felt a new sense of cold, the spray of the sea and ocean mixing with the typical snow and ice he loved. It was kind of glorious and he felt a little more stable on the Nokk, less like he was about to die.

"We're here." Jack looked up and peered over Elsa's shoulder. On the horizon was a large glacier. As he looked at it Jack felt something strange come over him. A Deja vu of sorts.

A name danced on the tip of his tongue. Several in fact, but he couldn't sound them out. Couldn't form them in his head.

It was terrible.

Nokk slowed and Jack saw the ocean had frozen over creating a land bridge for them as they got closer. The Nokk happily trotted on the bridge, seamlessly going from conquering the waves to sliding across the ice.

The horse gave an expecting shake of his head as he stopped at the edge of the glacier.

"Shall we?" Elsa asked with a wave of her hand and the ice around Jack's waist disappeared. Sliding off Nokk Jack nodded as he wobbled, regaining his balance.

"Good pony." Jack muttered under his breath as he reached out and hesitantly gave the Nokk a single pat on the neck. Wiping his hand on his pants he watched as Elsa breathed deeply and looked around.

In front of them a tunnel sprawled out, carved into the ice, sliding deep into the ground.

Jack had a shiver of apprehension go down his spine. His mind was racing, what secrets about himself would he uncover? What people did he forget, who did his icy death deem unimportant to him? Would he be able to look at himself the same way after this?

"Come on, it's fine." In front of him Elsa stood, her hands extended to the tunnel. How cute, she thought the ice was what he was afraid of.

Jack nodded and swung his staff over his shoulder. Elsa went ahead of him, traversing the tunnel with ease, tracing her hand down the icy wall. Jack watched as with a wave of her hand the ice lit up, illuminating a soft blue glow.

The light faded for a moment then was replaced by a bright spark. A spark that reminded Jack of the northern lights. Jack suddenly had the feeling something was alive in here.

A song echoed off the walls. Four sharp notes of song that sent shivers down Jack. Elsa though seemed ecstatic as she raced ahead, Jack forgotten.

Jack!

Mary was here as well it seemed.

"Go find them." Jack furrowed his brows at Elsa's request as she turned back to him, suppressing a smile as they stopped in a large cavern.

"How? You said they'd be here, my memories. How am I supposed to find something I don't know?"

Elsa tilted her head in thought.

"What do you remember, start there." Elsa went back to tracing the wall. Occasionally humming that same short four noted melody.

Jack scoffed. The glacier rumbled beneath his feet and a crack spread across the ice.

Elsa let out a noise of surprise and looked at Jack expectantly.

"Jack!" Mary's voice was louder now, and Elsa looked up in surprise.

"Who is that?"

Jack didn't answer but a small smile spread across his face. The glacier rumbled again, and a large creak sounded. Jack looked down to see the ice crumbling beneath his feet.

Before he could move the floor went out from under him.

"Jack!" Elsa and Mary's voices mingled into one as Jack landed in the bottom of a large pit. It was so cold but the most surprising thing was the people around him. Gorgeous statues, lifelike memories of people long gone. And all made of ice.

Some Jack recognized, children and people he had seen his first night as a spirit. The ones from Burgess, the ones that had ignored him like he was nothing.
"Jack!" Mary's voice was there. Actually, there not just an echo or a voice in his head. Jack turned and tears fell down his face.

It was her.

His sister, his baby sister, just as his broken memories showed!

Well not exactly, she was quite a bit older, and her voice was more mature, but he knew it was her!

Silently Jack watched as the frozen memory moved around, going about its role. Jack had the urge to hug her, but something kept him from disrupting the memory. Instead, he watched as the ice woman walked around occasionally interacting with other statues.

"I'm sorry Mary I know this is hard for you-" Jack choked back a sob as his mother walked by. Her hair was longer and frizzy, she was older than Jack had seen. She was comforting another Mary, probably in her late twenties as they huddled next to a lake.

It took Jack a moment to realize it was his pond. Guilt swarmed him but Jack continued on. Wiping at his face Jack sat down. For a moment he just listened.

So many voices spoke, so many he recognized but couldn't place.

Occasionally a statue of himself would walk by even. Jack had to admit he didn't like that. He felt like an imposter as he watched himself do countless things he couldn't remember. At one point he would be chopping wood then the next he was much younger and holding a baby Mary.

There were a few constant people that appeared. His mother was there always, Mary came soon after Jack was around ten and stayed for most of his memories. At one point Jack thought he saw a man similar to him and Mary but he didn't appear for long. From what Jack saw there was nothing with him past Mary's infancy.

It was a little overwhelming, but also so lovely.

"Jack.." his name didn't sound like his anymore. He felt like he was someone else, someone different from the one his memories showed. Someone entirely else.

"Jack!" Someone tapped him on the shoulder and Jack screamed.

Elsa flinched and stepped back the ice beneath her frosting over.

Jack clutched a hand to his chest. Elsa flushed and appeared to be trying to force out an apology.

"You..have you found what you needed?" Elsa asked, wringing her hands. Jack paused, what was he looking for again?

"What?"

"The…umm…a grave?" Elsa muttered and yanked at her fingers clearly sensing his confusion. Jack frowned at the action, it looked like she was trying to pull them clean off her hands.

Pulling her hands apart, Jack shook his head.

"No..I got a little distracted."

"Well, I suppose…" She cut herself off. She looked almost guilty. "We should find it, yes?" Jack didn't answer.

Truthfully, he never wanted to leave this place. He would be perfectly content to live in this glacier, to be surrounded by his family once more. Even if they weren't actually there.

"If..if you want."

Jack looked around. He had to admit he felt a headache building at the sight of everything.

It wasn't like he could come back here, was it? Would that horse, would Elsa allow him back if he asked?

"You can come back!" Elsa blurted all of a sudden. It took Jack a second to realize she had actually said it aloud and it wasn't a figment of his imagination.

"Once, once you find what you want..if you come back, I'll let you have a day of seeing everything." Jack opened his mouth to respond, his brow raised in skepticism.

Was this a trick?

"You said I can't come back; that's a rude thing to promise if-" Elsa sighed deeply.

"I'm saying you can, for this, you can return for a day." Jack blushed. Right. Elsa muttered something under her breath and waved her hands. The ice statues gently parted but continued to reenact their chosen memory.

Jack had to admit he felt a twinge of anger with Elsa messing with the statues. Not that they were real but still, he didn't necessarily want her down here with him. To see things even he didn't know about.

"But first, we need to find they're resting places." Elsa said, once more keeping her words careful.

Jack sighed and slowly followed her.

The two of them split up, taking half of the icy cavern. Despite the abundance of things Jack had, or well hadn't, experienced in his memories the task went relatively quickly.

Well Elsa went through each memory; Jack preferred the method of anything he recognized or that didn't include Mary was wistfully cast aside.

For the next hour or so it went well, except for the occasional embarrassing horror Jack would come across. At one point he heard a stifled gasp and saw Elsa scramble away from a memory of him kissing a girl.

Seeing that memory hurt Jack in a new way. For his family he was able to recall some of the love he had felt but this girl invoked nothing in him. Even if he had loved her the feeling was long gone now. Once more the feeling of being an imposter settled in his stomach.

"What is this?" Jack bit his lip and turned to Elsa, praying nothing terrible was there, something he couldn't explain. Instead he saw a large tree as tall as a skyscraper, and wide as a house.

This. This he could explain.

"It's Big Root." Elsa sighed, a noise that indicated she wasn't fully satisfied with Jack's answer and a noise that pleased Jack greatly.

"It's in Santoff Claussen.." Jack said slowly, watching as Elsa's nose scrunched in confusion and annoyance.

He had to admit it was a little cute to see her try and wrap her head around something.

"It's a village in Siberia."

"What type of tree is this? I've never seen anything quite like it." Elsa asked as she ran a hand down Big Root's trunk.

"It's not a normal tree, it's magic, father time found it, it was made out of stardust after a meteor hit and the tree was the only thing that survived."

Gale sent a large gust of wind through the cavern. Jack waved his hand and the spirit calmed down a little.

"Father time," Elsa muttered. "Of course.."

"You have your odd little friends, I have mine." Jack whispered as Gale shot between the two of them.

The silence returned. Every so often though Jack would catch Elsa staring back up at Big Root. It could have been that there were several, several statues of his mother around him but Jack felt a bit like he was getting scolded for his manners.

"Well if you let me come back, I can take you to Santoff Claussen if you want?" the question came out as a squeak. A pathetic noise.

Elsa didn't answer, something different caught her attention.

Jack opened his mouth to crack a joke but following her gaze he saw two large headstones. Names were inscribed at the top but Jack refused to read them.

Looked like he had found what he wanted after all.