the thread may stretch or tangle but it will never break
by Rose Thorne
Disclaimer: I don't own anything associated with The Untamed, and make no money writing fanfiction.
Chapter Thirty
When Lan Wangji is next fully aware, Wei Ying is snuggled sweat-slick against him, panting, his skin littered with sucked bruises and bite marks, and his first inclination is to apologize.
"First of all, that was hot—don't apologize," Wei Ying says with an amused-sounding snort.
Then Wei Ying fixes him with a serious look, one he rarely employs, and Lan Wangji waits, breath bated.
"Lan Zhan, I know you're worried about me, but you know I'm still the same person who helped win the war. I don't need you to protect me. I need you to trust me."
"I do," he says, a soft protest, and it's true; he trusts Wei Ying, but not others.
But Wei Ying is right, in that Lan Wangji didn't trust him enough to handle the rogue cultivator in that moment, fear gripping him.
"I worry," he adds, apologetic.
"I know," Wei Ying murmurs. "I worry, too. But I can't stop trying to uphold justice and protect the weak because I'm worried."
Lan Wangji knows, when they parted in the rain, Wei Ying worried the next time they met they would be opposite one another. It's a worry that has since passed, but if he had not uncovered the truth and stayed, it very well could have happened. He chose justice.
"I apol—"
Wei Ying shushes him with a finger.
"No apologies between us," he says, and kisses him.
They trade languid kisses for a while, then wash up and dress to rejoin the others.
Wei Qing is in her alcove, speaking to Jiang Wanyin when they approach.
"—health is a problem. Even without the resentful energy from the Seal, Wei Wuxian will likely have chronic pain from the injuries he sustained."
They pause to listen. Lan Wangji isn't sure Wei Ying wants this talked about, but his husband makes no move to stop them.
"But they healed," Jiang Wanyin says, sounding baffled.
"Yes, but mundane people often have chronic pain from old injuries, without a golden core to combat it," she explains gently. "And he has a lot of old injuries."
"Dammit all. And A-Xian is mundane now," comes the pained response. "Any medicines that may help, I'll get for you."
Wei Ying sighs and makes himself known, stepping into the alcove.
"The musical acupuncture helps, A-Cheng. I'm fine, promise."
"Still. Anything that can help, I'll get," Jiang Wanyin insists. "You shouldn't be in pain if you don't have to be."
"I agree," Lan Wangji says, continuing when Wei Ying frowns. "There is no nobility in needlessly suffering."
That gets a grimace, acknowledgment of that truth, and Lan Wangji places a hand at the small of his back to offer comfort.
"He's right," Wei Qing interjects, looking up from the medicine she's working on. "I'll make a list of ingredients. I can make salves and tinctures that will help without having problematic side effects like drowsiness. Though those would be fine for night."
"Unless we're attacked," Wei Ying says grimly, and no one has a response to that, though Wei Qing swats him away from her ingredients when he pokes at them.
"The rogue cultivators are ready to be flown to Lotus Pier," Jiang Wanyin eventually says. "He'll be kept unconscious until he's confined."
"We're storing him with the first one. The kids are sneaking in to poke him with sticks in the meantime," Wei Qing adds wryly. "They're not being gentle about it."
Wei Ying only nods, and Lan Wangji agrees with the lack of concern for the rogue cultivator.
"We'll have to reconsider how we handle visitors," Wei Ying says.
"Two Jiang guards at all times at the barrier," Jiang Wanyin states.
"A-Ning and I will accompany you to the base of the mountain when someone activates the wards," Wen Qing adds. "Reconsidered. Any additions?"
Lan Wangji can think of nothing to add—he will of course accompany them, but they know that. Wei Ying shakes his head, looking nonplussed.
"You're leaving enough disciples for shifts?" he asks.
"You came under attack," Jiang Wanyin says slowly. "Of course I'm leaving enough disciples, Wei Wuxian! I'm not letting anyone attack my brother again."
Wei Ying gives him an affectionate look, and Jiang Wanyin scowls at him with no real vitriol.
"Things have changed," Wei Qing says with a sigh. "Once the Lan and Nie know there's essentially a bounty on our heads, we may have more guards. This is a serious alliance. You're not alone anymore, Wei Wuxian."
The sworn brotherhood allies all the sects around Wei Ying, brings the former Wen into it through Wei Qing and Wei Ying, and offers protection beyond what Lan Wangji can provide. He feels settled, relieved beyond what he can express—he trusts Wei Ying, but he can trust their allies as well.
As though to prove the point, Luo Qingyang storms in, outraged that she missed an attack, having been in town shopping for Wei Qing.
"I was only gone a shichen!"
"Everyone's fine," Wei Ying assures her. "Qing-jie used her needles, and the kid is safe."
That doesn't seem to ease Luo Qingyang's worries.
"I'll take my turns at the gate," she tells Jiang Wanyin. "That poor kid must have been terrified."
Lan Wangji realizes abruptly that he barely thought of the girl, so focused he was on Wei Ying, and he's ashamed. He had promised alongside Wei Ying to stand with justice and live with no regrets, and he had faltered, his judgment clouded in a way that reminded him of his father. Instead he had been concerned only for Wei Ying.
To be worthy of Wei Ying, he will have to do better to keep their promise.
"She's fallen asleep, for now," Jiang Wanyin tells them, though Lan Wangji barely takes in the words. "Her brother is with her, so she's not alone."
"She had calmed by then," Wei Qing adds, "but you should be there when she wakes."
"Did she attach to Jiang Cheng?" Wei Ying asks. "I bet she'll become our first Jiang."
"That's hardly my first concern," Jiang Wanyin scoffs.
"Still!" Wei Ying insists. "A Jiang kid."
Jiang Wanyin shakes his head, but in part with amusement.
A Jiang child is clearly important to them, and Lan Wangji suddenly remembers the entire sect, including the children, was massacred. The sect regrew with adult cultivators, but the children are few. Of course it would be important. Jiang children will be the next generation. The hope for the future.
Ultimately, Jiang Wanyin returns to the child. A-Yuan and A-Zhi come looking for them, and Lan Wangji and Wei Ying relocate outside so they can play until the evening meal, letting Popo take a break.
The boys animate their butterfly and grasshopper toys, engaged in some sort of unfolding story, and Wei Ying relaxes against him as they oversee their play, sitting in the waning light of late afternoon.
It is a quiet piece of paradise, but one Lan Wangji has difficulty enjoying.
Supper is simple fare—nothing extravagant, but there is plenty of it—and the children are happy to eat until they are sated. Lan Wangji does his best to ensure Wei Ying does as well, placing choice bits into his bowl, aided by Popo.
Lan Wangji's mind is still on his failure, even as he plays Wangji to treat Wei Ying with Wei Qing, who is not pleased about the marks littering his skin—she says nothing, but gives him a dark look, something Wei Ying protests.
"Aiya, Qing-jie, don't glare at my husband like that," he says, his voice full of mirth.
"I'll glare at whoever I want, Wei Wuxian."
Afterward, while Wei Ying rests, he helps settle the children in for the night—a task not easy with their excitement about traveling in carriages the next day, something novel to most of them. The little girl, A-Fang, is attached to Jiang Wanyin to the exclusion of nearly all others, and her older brother stays close as well.
The adults who will be traveling with them gather their meager belongings so they're ready to leave in the morning. Bai-shushu will travel with A-Yun and A-Heng, and Dong-shushu will accompany A-Tao, having bonded with the boy. Fu-ayi will also ride in a carriage with the children to act as a chaperone.
When Wei Ying wakes, he gravitates toward him naturally, pulled irrevocably. He feels some guilt, and Wei Ying seems to notice, pulling him from the proceedings to their alcove to check on him.
"You've been distant all evening, Lan Zhan," Wei Ying murmurs, sounding concerned. "Are you okay?"
"I did not think of the child," he confesses. "I thought only of you."
A blush spreads across Wei Ying's cheeks, and he ducks his head.
"Aiya, Lan Zhan, be merciful on your poor husband. You're too much."
Lan Wangji shakes his head, because he doesn't mean this to flatter him.
"No, Wei Ying. I did not think of the child."
Wei Ying's eyes widen and he clearly understands immediately.
"Lan Zhan," he breathes, pulling him close. "It's not your fault. Qing-jie keeps telling you to focus on me."
"I did not stand with justice."
"Every day you're here you stand with justice," Wei Ying insists. "Every day."
He isn't sure whether that overshadows his inaction.
"Qing-jie and Jiang Cheng had it handled," Wei Ying says. "Don't forget the other part: to live without regrets."
Lan Wangji regrets his actions, or inaction, and he isn't sure how to stop.
"We delegated. You were too far away from her to reach in time, anyway. And if I handled it, it would've been bloodier, which would have traumatized the kid even more."
Delegation—something Wei Qing has been pushing Wei Ying especially to do. Something Lan Wangji is also not good at doing, especially when it comes to Wei Ying.
But he doesn't regret putting Wei Ying first, not really. Only that he didn't consider the innocent at risk when he did.
"I will endeavor to delegate more," Lan Wangji says finally, though he isn't sure that's enough.
Wei Ying cups his cheek, leaning in to kiss him sweetly.
"Don't beat yourself up, Airen. Tomorrow is another day."
Eventually, the children are down for the night, and Wei Ying goes to drink with Jiang Wanyin, leaving Lan Wangji with Wei Qing.
They discuss the exodus planned for tomorrow, the children and carriages Min Cenxi arranged from Yiling, and eventually simply sip tea in a comfortable quiet.
"You did the right thing, holding him back," she tells him, ending the silence. "He forgets to delegate."
He didn't realize he was so transparent that even Wei Qing would notice. Lan Wangji shakes his head and tries to explain.
"I did not think of the child," he admits, still ashamed.
Wei Qing watches him quietly for a moment.
"That's fine; I need your focus on him. You had me, A-Ning, and Jiang Cheng to think of the girl."
He says nothing and she sighs.
"You had a moment where you forgot all else, which would normally be a bad thing if you were alone, but you're not, and he's not. You've not been in a situation where Wei Wuxian could be in imminent danger since you married him until now."
He understands she is expecting that this was simply the stress of the situation, and she may be right. He may behave differently next time, having erred this time.
Perhaps the reality is that Wei Ying is simply a better man than he is, or is at least less selfish.
"I still want you to keep him out of danger, though—as much as you can, anyway."
He is not his father, Lan Wangji reminds himself again. Even if Wei Ying is most important to him, he has not locked him away to keep him out of danger, instead seeking to help him on his terms.
If Wei Ying wanted him to leave and never speak to him again, he would reluctantly do so—though he's fairly sure they're beyond that now. Even if it means losing him, he'll do what Wei Ying wants.
"And here's another way you can help."
She hands him a sachet for Wei Ying's bath and a container with a salve.
"New ingredients. This should help some of the back pain from his scars."
She's referring to the scars from Zidian, both those from the day Lotus Pier fell and before. They have been tackling those with musical acupuncture, as well. Wei Ying hides the pain, but Lan Wangji can see through it, and the salve will help once he applies it following his bath.
Ultimately, applying it will lead to other activities, but those will serve to distract Lan Wangji from his worries enough to sleep.
Tomorrow is another day, and time is good medicine.
Lan Wangji had a difficult time this chapter, which wound up being shorter than I expected. He's kind of realized Wei Wuxian is more important to him than almost anything. Which reminds him of his father.
So I had a neuropsychiatry appointment, and was told I am a Porsche running on the wrong fuel. Basically, nothing is wrong in my brainpan. It's just that I have long COVID and the fatigue and pain impact my ability to think and work. I'll likely be in a clinical study soon, assuming the federal funding isn't withheld by the orange cretin.
There are several references to Chinese idioms in this chapter. Time is good medicine, for example. Dong, 栋, pinyin dòng, means pillar or beam. Fu, 芙, pinyin fú, means hibiscus or lotus.
airen = person you love / spouse
ayi = aunt
jie = elder sister
popo = grandmother
shichen = 2 hour period
shushu = uncle