Hello,

I'm slightly obsessed with Angel and Buffy at the moment. It annoys me that they don't get their happily ever after, so I've decided like many before me to change that. So here is my take on them getting their happy ending. Has it been done before, possibly...do I care? Nope. There will be original chapters and some chapter will be from the series and Angel. I'm also a huge sucker for a pregnancy story so I just had to add it in there, plus I wanna examine and explore Buffy being a mother. Something that wasn't in the series. I am one myself, so I will be using real life experiences when we get to motherhood with Buffy.

No update schedule, it will happen when it happens :) I haven't written smut for awhile, so it's a bit rusty but hopeful I did it justice. If not, well sorry...

Credit to David Greenwalt & Jeannine Renshaw for the dialogue especially at the beginning which as we all know is taken from 'I Will Remember You'. I will admit, I read and watched this scene and boy did I cry. And I mean the ugly sobbing ones heart cry. It wasn't pretty. But it needed to be done. Also I've only just found out but does anyone hear David saying Sarah in the episode! I did, it made me bawl even harder!

Credit also to Buffy vs Angel website for the transcript of the episode.

This is unbeta'd so any mistakes are my own. Anyways, I've rambled on enough so enjoy my take on these crazy love bugs.

The brightness was blinding, closing her eyes she takes in the sea air and the breeze. It was refreshing as it cools her warm body. She forgot how beautiful it was being here. The sounds of birds tweeting within the distance fills her ears along with constant chatter and laughter of bystanders nearby. The smell of the sea calls to her, memories of her parents bring her down to the beach of when they were happy before their lives changed. Before everything happened.

The woman frowns as her skin begins to vibrant, senses becoming alert. Butterflies flutter within her stomach, this only happens when he's nearby. But that couldn't be possible, it was still daylight. She turns as the sensation of him grows closer. But how could this be? The sun was still high, brightening her skin.

Her eyes land on lean man heading towards her. Even without seeing him up close she knew him. She knew his beautiful soul, the softness of his skin against her own and his brooding personality. He steps out from a shadowed arch from a nearby hedge, he strolls towards her with a determined purpose. Her breath catches in her throat as the sun kisses his pale skin. The woman frowns slightly, he's not going up in flames like he should be doing right now. This couldn't be possible. Was this a dreaming…

He stops in front of her and draws her close to him, his arms enclosing around her. She was home in his arms. Words are long forgotten; thoughts escape her as he leans down and places his lips a upon her own. She finally feels alive again, her body tingles like it always does when he kisses her. Her hands find the nape of his neck pulling him closer to her, her whole body awakening with his touch.

It was hard, demanding, and punishing, both of them fighting for dominance, to gain the upper hand. In the end it was he who won, she couldn't fight him any longer. Everything that she ever dreamed off since she met him felt like it was coming true. She could never resist him. Their lips teasing and tasting, becoming intoxicated with one another. Neither was bothered by their surroundings, just taking in this magical moment of being together after months apart.

They sit across from one another, tension and awkwardness filling the air taking up the entire darkness of the kitchen. She doesn't recognise where she is but assumes it's his new apartment. She fidgets in her chair, the uncomfortableness of being close to him yet not touching him takes over. It doesn't help that her irritation of their conversation begins to grow within, she doesn't want this distance that seems to have grown between them since he left 4 months ago.

The man gets up from his spot opposite her with a sigh and moves to sit down in the chair next to her. ""I'm not saying I don't want you. You know how much. I'm just saying it's worth the wait to be sure this is right. I need to be sure you won't get hurt again."

It's then her turn to get up and move away from him even though she body and soul call out to be close with him again. She has her back to him, "you know it's a good thing I didn't fantasize about you turning human only about 10 zillion times, because today would have been a real let down." She turns to face him once again and leans against the kitchen side. "So how does the mature plan go? You call me? I call you? What?"

He gets up from the seat and steps over to her. "We stay in touch - just not..."

"Literally. Funny." They stare at each other; she lets out a sigh and walks past him. "Okay, I'd better..."

He turns to look after her, "right. Remove the temptation."

She spins back towards him, she sees the sadness in his eyes knowing that it reflects her own, "so, we'll… talk soon."

She places her hand on top of his which were on the counter, both of their eye's stare down at their hands knowing they both can feel the vibration running through their fingertips all the way into their nervous systems. The man turns his hand to hold onto hers, he reaches out to her pulling her into a bruising kiss. Their earlier conversation long forgotten.

The couple stumble their way back towards the fridge uncaring of anything but the feel of one another. His hands run along the length of her body, reaching her thighs he holds them. The woman understands what he wants jumps into his arms, her legs wrapping around his waist. She feels the hardness of him against her causing her to let out a moan against his lips. Without breaking their lips apart, the man manages manoeuvre them over to the kitchen table, he sweeps everything onto the floor. Ignoring the crashing and the sounds of things breaking he lays her down onto it.

Their lip's part, the sudden need for air growing too much for the couple, the man's lips make their way down to her neck against the mark he had made so many months ago. She lets out a cry as his teeth nip on the scarred imprint. Their hips begin to grind against one another, her hands quickly find the buttons of his shirts and begins undo them. Finding this task slow and painful she rips it open; buttons fly all around the dark room, his top thrown to the side. The man pulls away from her neck and lifts her up slightly to take off her top and the one underneath it.

He groans loudly seeing the redness of her bra against golden skin. He is a sucker for a woman in red…just this woman in red. He places his lips back onto the skin of her neck, she gasps for breath as the feeling of his lips caressing against her skin. A hum of pleasure runs through her body, her whole body feeling like it was on fire.

Her fingers run through the softness of his hair, pulling on it slightly trying to get his attention to gain his lips back onto her own. The man eventually caves into her desires, with a smirk on his lips he places them back on hers. This one slower, tender than the others as they both nip, glide savouring the taste of each other. Sparks continuously fly between them.

His hands begin to wander along the curves of her back until they reach the clasp of her bra, she feels him undoing the constrictive piece of clothing. Straps are slowly lowered, they pull away from their kiss panting against one another's cheek. He stares deeply into her eyes in complete wonder before lowering his head to one abandoned teat that is begging for his attention.

She watches as it is sucked into his mouth, her own mouth wide open in arousal. She throws her head back against the wood and lets out a moan when he begins to suck on her slightly, she could feel one of his hands going to the other breast. Beginning to play with the forgotten nipple. Her own hands start to run along the length of his body, feeling his bare skin. She could feel him trembling slightly above her.

The man moves his lips away from one breast going to the other, she could feel one of his hands undoing her jeans. Once they're unbutton she lifts her hips up trying to assist him with taking them off, in the process they had also taken her knickers with them. The man lifts his head up and smirks before beginning to lower himself down towards her thighs.

"Angel, I need you right now." The woman stops him, her strong thighs gripping him in place as her hands reach for his shoulder pulling him back up to her. Once he is level with her again, hands make their way down to his trousers quickly and without wasting time she unbuttons them. His own hands come to assist her by pulling down the zipper and like they did with her own pants together they pulled down his jeans and boxers.

Their lips find one another again, she could feel her heart rate spiking like it does every single time. The sudden warmth of his lips unfamiliar against her own, yet not unwelcomed. His lips felt firm tracing along her own, his tongue begging for entrance softly along her lower lip. She grants his request, their tongues beginning to dance for a moment before he pulls away. His darken lustful eyes meet her own, "this is going to be quick and fast. I don't think I can do slow." He tells her, she smirks and pulls him closer to her burning body. She feel his hardness against her wet centre.

"Good, because I don't think I can do slow either." She answers back to him, he smirks and leans down to her, pressing his lips against her own kissing her slowly, trying to show her how much she meant to him within that kiss. The briefly grind against each other, trying to tease the other.

They soon grow too impatient, it had been a long time since they had been like this together. The feel of skin on skin, being closer together again. Slow, tender and soft wasn't going to happen with this couple. The man moves away, placing his feet back onto the ground and pulls the woman closer to him. Lining himself up to her, he stares into her eyes and sees certainty, love and awe. She leans up onto her elbows as he leans towards her, their lips meet as he slides into her.

The woman moans into his mouth, she finally feels complete after months of being without him. He feels so hard inside her, filling her to the brim. Neither could see where one began and the other ended.

"Oh god…Angel." She moans out to him as they pull away; the steady rhythm of their hips the feel of his lips as they caress her glistening skin becoming too much for the woman. She throws her head back onto the table, one of her hands grab the edge of the table as the other holds onto the man's head against her neck.

"Fuck Buffy…" The man groans against the heat of her neck, his hips beginning to grind faster against hers. His lips move away from their spot, following the path of the curve of her neck to her cheeks with sweet butterfly kisses until they reach the final destination of her lips. He couldn't go long without placing his lips to her own. He was addicted to her, everything about her. Her intoxicating floral smell, the sweet taste of her lips. The softness of her hair as his hands get lost and tangled within. She was his obsession.

His hips did not stop once, her legs wrapped around his waist. She grasps hold of his shoulders holding him tightly, her nails digging in creating half-moons indents. The woman throws her head back, her mouth lets out a silent scream as he hits the spot inside of her, she could feel herself reaching rapidly towards her orgasm.

"You feel amazing…" he whispers to her, placing a gentle kiss on her lips unlike the frantic of his thrusts against her body. He could feel her tightening around him, he could easily get lost within this woman.

"Buffy…I'm gonna…" He tells her, one of his hands goes down to her clit and begins to expertly play with it. The tightness surrounding her was pushing him closer to the edge. He tries to move away and out of her before he cums deep inside her, she wasn't having any of it.

She pulls him closer to her, hands reaching down to his backside pushing him in deeper into her, "inside me Angel…please."

He shakes his head, trying to get her to understand as well as pulling away from her further. He even tries to detangle her legs at his waist; yet she pulls him deeper into her. "Shit…Buffy." He presses his lips against hers and moans into her mouth, his fight lost within him. The frantic movement of his hips becoming sloppy as they both grow closer.

"Angel…angel…" The woman calls out, the tightness of her whole body giving into the pleasure of him, of them. Her eyes grow wide as she looks at him, neither of them could pull their eyes away.

He feels her orgasm rock through her, he finally lets go. "Buffy…" He calls out as he empties himself inside of her while staring into her eyes, both of their breaths catch in their throats. The moment was beautiful as green meets brown.

Then they both hear a snap and nearly fall to the ground as the kitchen table was worn out from its unplanned vigorous usage. The man quickly grabs her bum holding her as he stands up to full height carrying her through to the bedroom not even taking a second glance at the poor broken table.

A man runs back into the room with an arm full of food, uncaring of his nakedness. He dumps the stuff on the bed and slips under the sheet. He takes in the beautiful blonde woman in front of him wearing his black robe. He grins at her as she beams back at him. Both of them falling back into ease with one another, like no time or distance had pass between them.

"The perfect yum." The man raises an eyebrow, he then leans forward slightly a spoon in his hand. She leans forward herself, her eyes never leaving the man as she takes a mouthful of the offered ice cream. "Mmm, this is a dream. You're human for like a minute and already there is Cookie-dough-fudge-mint-chip in the fridge."

"God, I love food." He tells her, his eyes lightening up with pure happiness. She could get use to this.

The woman goes ahead to feed him some ice cream on a chocolate waffle: "Food is good." She answers back to him. He grins and leans himself forward to her, they meet halfway and kiss. It was a simple soft kiss; she was able to taste the chocolate on his lips.

"Why didn't you ever tell me about chocolate and peanut butter?" The man questions, he places the spoon back into the ice cream pot and scoops some of the creamy goodness onto the piece of cutlery.

She shrugs at him,"well, I figured if your vamp taste buds couldn't really savour it, then it would only hurt you, you know? By the way, I'm over the whole needing to be mature thing. That time you just spent in the kitchen. That was enough time apart."

He nods his head in agreement with her, a silly smile on his face. "Too much." The couple lean into one another again and kiss. The kiss unfortunately didn't last too long as ice cream drips from his spoon on his chest.

"Okay, mortal coordination leaving something to be desired." He chuckles out, his cheeks begin to grow red from embarrassment.

"Wrong. It's just right." She tells him biting her lower lip she lowers her head towards his naked chest. Her green eyes refusing to give up the contact with his own brown ones as she licks up the ice cream. The man shifts his lower body and lets out a nervous chuckle as he watches her. The blonde beauty lifts her head back up, the man's hands make their way into her silky hair and pulls her down for another kiss. No longer wanting to be apart from her for too long.

His whole beating heart belongs to her and her alone. It has ever since he laid eyes on her all those years ago even if his heart didn't beat at the time.

Silence fills the room for a moment, the couple look at one another. Tears form as the woman asks "When," her heart slowly begins to shatter once more. The dark-haired man looks up at the clock, his hands never leaving hers.

He swallows and whispers, "another minute."

She tears stream down her golden cheeks, her head begins to shake. "a minute? , it's not enough time!"

"We don't have a choice. It's done." Tears begin to form in his own eyes, knowing he is breaking her heart all over again as well as his own. Not that his heart would matter in a few minutes.

The woman sobs, her green eyes never leaving his. The warmth of his body fills her as his arms enclose around her. "How am I supposed to go on with my life knowing what we had? What we could have had?"

"You won't. No one will know but me." He tells her, wiping a tear away from her cheek.

Her eyes widen at his confession, "everything we did."

"It never happened."

The blonde woman shakes her head and sobs out, "it did. It did. I know it did!" Placing her hand on his chest where she feels the patter of his heartbeat thumping against her fingertips. "I felt your heartbeat." Her lips tremble as she looks up at him unable to stop the tears from streaming down her face. A tear drops down his cheek as he takes in her soul-crushing expression.

"Buffy…" he leans down and kisses her. Together they put everything they had into the kiss, the passion, the feeling of being home and safe with one another, along with the love they felt for each other. Both could feel the other tears, the taste of salt from them. She pulls away and turns to look over at the clock, the minute is almost up.

"No! Oh God. It's not enough time." She cries out to him turning to face him once again, he runs his hands through her hair trying to calm her down, but it was a useless feat.

"Shh, please. Please." They hold each other tightly both crying. "Please, please." She took everything about him in, the way it felt to be in his arms; safe, warm, and loved. Cinnamon hit her nostrils as she took in his spicy scent, she could even smell a hint of the soap that he uses. She could feel his heart pounding against his chest, she took everything about this moment in, knowing that this was the last time she would be in his warm arms.

"No. I'll never forget. I'll never forget. I'll never forget. I'll never forget." She repeats to him in his ear while shaking her head.

"Together you were powerful. Alone, you are dead…" The beady eyes of a green demon shouts out.

January 2000

Buffy jolts awake, she lets out a groan as she feels her stomach doing flips once again. Closing her eyes she tries to will the nausea away; she sits up in bed and puts her lamp on hoping it doesn't disturb her roommate.

Buffy takes slow breaths, but it was an impossible task, the young woman stands suddenly and rushes out of the dorm room heading towards one of the shared bathrooms on her floor.

She barely makes it there, she even forgets to shut the bathroom door, before emptying the contents of her stomach. Not that there had been much in it to begin with.

Coughing violently as bile comes up through her mouth. She hated this, hated feeling sick and the vulnerability it gave her. The idea that it could send her to hospital, it was unbearable. Closing her eyes as tears swim along the edges of them, once she finishes and flushes the toilet, she leans her head against the seat. Continuing to take deep breaths, trying, and hoping to calm the bubbling sensation.

"Buffy…" Buffy hums in recognition of her best friend's voice. "Are you okay?" Buffy gives Willow a thumbs up, refusing to move to much in case it causes another bout of sickness to sweep upon her.

Willow lets out sigh, moving further into the room and closes the door to the bathroom. She bites her lower lip before sitting down next to the slayer, one of her hands rubs her back in sympathy. In her other hand was a rectangular box, she places onto the floor in the eyesight of Buffy. "You should do a test. Just in case and to rule it out. You've been like this for a couple of weeks Buffy and you're not getting any better."

Buffy turns her head to look at the red-headed woman in front of her, "Will, I haven't slept with anyone since Parker and that was months ago. It's just going to say negative."

"It's only to rule it out Buffy. Besides, when you go to the doctor they will do a test on you anyway. It's a simple procedure they do to rule it out before doing anything else. It's a piece of mind really and being proactive." Willow points out giving Buffy a small smile.

"I do wanna be proactive." Buffy lets out a sigh. "Fine." She pouts, the blond shoos her best friend out of the room then closes the door. Her green eyes land on the little box, staring at it for a few moments. She huffs and shakes her head, "might as well get this over with."

Buffy does what she needs to do, she washes her hands and looks into the mirror. Bloodshot, tired eyes stare back at her. She hasn't slept well since graduation, not that anyone would have noticed. So long as she listens, patrols and doesn't go to him then everything else doesn't matter much. A lone tear slides down her face, quickly brushing it aside. It wouldn't do her any good self-wallowing. She takes a deep breath and looks at the test.

She stares and stares at the little stick, taking it into her hand and looks at the box it came in. Checking the results against one another, she slides down onto the floor staring at the pair. Heart beginning to sink as she takes in the results. Mind going back to how this could happen when the reason for her rude awakening flashes through her mind.

The dream. Was it just a dream?

A day that was long forgotten.

A heart beating, lips passionately seeking one another, him in the sunlight with a careless grin upon his face. The sound of laughter filling a quiet dark apartment. His naked skin against her own, the feel of him inside of her once again. His expression as he spread his living seed deep inside of her. The love they shared passionately with one another. The few short moments of pure joy of being together again without curses.

Her eyes widen as the memory plays over in her mind. It felt like she was getting stabbed repeatedly in the chest as it all comes back to her. The decision he made without acknowledging her thoughts or feelings about it. Holding onto him tightly trying to remember the warmth of his body and being safe within his arms.

She remembered everything that happened back in November. Everything that she had dreamed off since she had met Angel had been in her grasp only for it all to be ripped away from her within less than 24 hours.

It was cruel and unfair.

And now this, the universe had a sick, twisted way of mocking her.

Buffy drops both the test and packaging onto the floor, one hand wraps around herself as the other goes to her mouth. A sob echoes around the room, loud enough that Willow comes barging into the room seeing her best friend weeping her heart out, she hadn't seen her like this since Angel left.

Willow swallows the tears that threaten her own eyes at the brokenness of the woman on the floor. "Oh Buffy." Shutting the door, ensuring that it locked she makes her way over to Buffy joining her onto the floor. She looks at the box then the test, positive. Willow wraps her arms around the blonde who falls into her arms willingly and rock her back and forth as sobs continue fill the small bathroom.

Her body shakes with uncontrollable sobs causing her chest to ache, she begins to struggle to breathe. She tries and is unsuccessful to get control of her breathing but every time she shut her eyes, the vision of him telling her that he was giving up his humanity, on them, on her. She understood his reasoning, she got it. But it still hurt knowing that he would fight then be with her. Wasn't she worth it? Was she not good enough for him?

Her eyes become swollen from the uncontrollable saltness of her tears, she could feel her cheeks becoming tender and sore. She knew her heart was being shattered all over again like a glass always falling to the ground continuously and nothing is stopping it from breaking. Watching it repeatedly fall to the ground.

She's exhausted of trying to be fine when she was utterly broken-hearted. There were so many unanswered questions, does she tell him? If she told him, will he turn her away again? Would he even believe her? Doubtful…What was she going to do? Does she quit college or just keep going until…? What about her mother? What will she say? What about slaying? And Giles?

All these questions raced through her mind; she had no idea of what is going to happen now. Buffy eventually pulls away from Willow when she manages to get control of her breathing. Neither of the women knew how long they had been sat in the bathroom. Willow gives Buffy a pained look while Buffy grabs a tissue, she blows on her nose.

Buffy wipes her nose before placing her hands onto her legs, she looks at Willow and sees her top soaking. "I'm sorry about your top."

Willow looks down to her top seeing it wet, she waves her off, "don't worry about it. Are you okay?"

Buffy sits there for a moment contemplating Willow's question. She turns her head to the tiny window of the bathroom and closes her eyes. A little boy with dark eyes and a cheeky smirk flash throughout her mind. She could do this. She knew in her gut that she could never get rid of something she created with Angel. Not over her dead body. She could be a slayer, college student and mother.

A small soft smile begins to form a upon the slayer's face, she looks back at her best friend. "I think I will be."

Willow brightens up at the change in Buffy's attitude, she then askes another question. "Do you know what you want to do?"

Buffy places her hand onto her flat stomach, her baby was growing in there. "I'm keeping him."

"Him?" Willow frowns and glances down at her friend's stomach.

"I know it sounds silly, but I just know it's a boy. I don't know how to explain it, but I feel him Will." She says softly, looking down at her stomach. Willow gives her a smile and takes her hand.

"It doesn't sound silly at all." Buffy gives Willow a gratefully smile and gives her hand a squeeze. Willow then bites her bottom lip, "do you know who…"

"It's Angel's." Buffy says naturally. Willow's eyebrows nearly end up in the witch's hairline, her mouth drops open as she stares at her roommate.

"What?"