Thank you to everyone who read or reviewed the last conversation. You're all wonderful. I'm sorry for the lag between updates, but weekly updates will resume, now that I have several chapters back from proofreading.
Warning: Discussion of a past suicide attempt.
Day 34: Human Preteens Are Illogical
Dear James:
Yesterday after Alpha shift I attempted to converse with Josephine per our breakfast discussion with Nyota, but I was unsuccessful. She refused to disclose any information related to her treatment by the other minors on board Enterprise. She said that she was not encountering any difficulties with her classmates despite only making eye contact with her dinner tray. Obviously, this is an untruth due to the fact she ran an allergy detecting tricorder over her tray before eating.
n addition, her PADD was missing again. Ensign Margolis found it on level six inside of a recycling bin. This is the third time that has happened in the last 19 days.
I am uncertain how I can convince her that I am a trustworthy source to confide in and that I will take her issues seriously. She has confided in both of us in the past regarding her mother's death. And yet now when it is obvious that someone is hurting her, she refuses to speak. I find this situation troubling, especially because the inappropriate conduct is happening on ship and scrubbing decks six and seven with a toothbrush is apparently not enough of a deterrent to stop such inappropriate conduct.
Dear Spock:
That's because apparently Jeremy is a masochist. I think maybe one or two of the Ashleys are smart enough to realize that we are not going to put up with their bullshit.
It's nothing personal, Spock, it's just preteen behavior. Did you ever tell your dad that your school days were miserable because you were constantly criticized and ridiculed for being multi species? Did you mention to him about your classmates referring to your mom as a whore, slut, prostitute, bitch or any other slur for a woman who's powerful, but scares the crap out of them?
What about that time they locked you in your learning pod and you missed lunch. Oh, wait they did that every day for what three months? You started bringing protein bars with you, so you wouldn't miss out on crucial nutrition. You're lucky that Vulcans only need to pee like once every eight hours. You, my lovely husband, never said a word about what was going on and you know it. So, don't expect Jo Jo to be different. Your parents had no clue until you broke someone's nose.
Why was that? Was it because you were afraid that they wouldn't be able to do anything? Were you afraid of being disappointed in their inability to fix things? Were you afraid that they would be so apathetic that they wouldn't care? Or did you think that your father felt the same way they did?
The teenage mind is a scary place and the preteen mind is worse. You know all these types of thoughts are going through her head right now. Look, you're out of the shower, talk more later.
Love you, sweetie bear.
Dear James:
Yes, I was afraid of my father's reaction because I assumed it would be on par with that of my peers. I was not even sure of his love of my mother until after her passing. I felt like my entire existence was a side product of political diplomacy. I am aware now that is not the case, but at the time that is what I believed.
I did not share what was happening at school with my parents because I did not believe that they needed to know. I did not want to burden them with these issues when I believed I could handle it without adult assistance. As an adult, I realize that my logic was faulty, but I do not know how to convey that to Josephine. I am open to suggestions.
Dear Spock Bear:
Oh, your logic was very faulty. I'm so glad to know you were a stupid teenager like the rest of us. I think we had this conversation over breakfast a couple of days ago when we showed Nyota the email from Kevin. Your teenage mind convinces you that your parents can't help so you don't say anything, but because you don't say anything they can't help you.
It's dumb, but that's what we believe at the time. Remember I kept quiet for years about… about what Frank did to me. The bastard convinced me that no one would believe me. And even if they did they couldn't do anything to stop him. I tried to kill myself before I told somebody the truth.
So how do we avoid the kids getting to this breaking point? I think it's letting them know that there is someone there. Margarita suggested that I write the kids an email not as the first officer of their ship, but as a survivor of the Starfleet orphans' club. I am considering it because if Jo Jo's PADD went missing again then as you stated this morning obviously scrubbing the decks isn't working as effectively as it should. Maybe you could write Jo Jo not as the captain of the ship that she's living on, but as a friend of her mom, as somebody who has survived bullies and has successfully come out on the other side of it.
From what you told me and from what I've observed of certain assholes at our diplomatic wedding, they were awful to you. I mean people were nasty to me because I was smart, but I was at smart kids' school until I had to pick up the slack with Kevin. I mean, I helped with Kevin's bullies, but I feel that I was seeing the situation from the eyes of a parent. Raising Kevin kind of adjusted my view of the world. And let's be honest, I really did raise Kevin.
Oh God, I think that's another reason why they gave us these kids. I have parental experience with emotionally damaged children.
Dear James:
Kevin is a productive member of society and a top cadet at the Academy, so obviously, you know what you're doing. I think your idea has merit and I'm willing to try something similar along the lines. I think you should do the same with the minors. However, I reserve the right to review the document before it is sent out.
Dear Cuddle Husband:
Totally agree. But I get to read yours first because that's what first officer's do. You know when I'm not trying to find us a new assistant. Would it be totally confusing if I hire a Kevin?
Dear James:
You cannot discriminate against any capable candidate simply because they share a name with your brother, either brother. However, I do acquiesce to your request to proofread my correspondence to Josephine.
Dear Spock Bear:
Fine, other Kevin will make it to the next round of possible candidates along with his wife.
To be continued