a/n: I wrote this on December 24th, 2013. There is no old author's note. I was trying to be deep, I think, and I was also thirteen.
Disclaimer: I don't own KH.
For Koko, but this isn't the actual one-shot that I made for you...
PITYING
Staring at the vacant blue has made me into something I never wanted to become. If I had been born from happiness, from laughter, I wouldn't be like this. The thing is, I'll never be any of those things. Why? I'll always be in the shadow of someone supposedly greater—better. Who is that person? That person isn't just one. It's a million. A million people I'll never surpass in the near future. As I sit here waiting for those hateful orange eyes to appear; I can say only this . . .
Fear who taint you, not those who craft you into a better being. Those people who help you are the best out there. I'll never have anything like that. I'll never genuinely smile at someone human. Why? It's not my part, not who I'm meant to be. I will always be scorned. I will always like the silence. I will always be nothing.
No one can change that I was born solely from darkness, not even Xehanort. I understand he's only using me, but he's also the only person that's shown me affection. Maybe not the right kind, but affection nonetheless. Ventus thinks he has it so hard, but he doesn't. His heart is full of light, full of something that would only hurt me. Yet . . . I'm apart of him. One day, that ghost of a smile of mine will leave. Be gone entirely. That smile will be replaced with an emotionless face.
You can't kill a ghost because it's already dead.
.:.x.:.
Raging war, raging war,
You are something I cannot ignore,
I do not see your beauty,
I only see scorn,
Raging war, raging war,
I wish to see no more,
This place is not darkness at its core,
Sing me a peaceful lullaby of liberty,
Give me a city of lights,
A city with no fights
.:.x.:.