Thank you to everybody who read or reviewed the last set of messages. You are all lovely people.
Day 188: Family
From: Kevin KR
To: Peter_K
bcc: Elizabeth_Chen
Time arrived: 8/28/2260 00:00:01
Subject: Welcome to the family, at least we give cookies when we screw up.
Okay, Liz and I are writing this email together because if you got emails from the entire family, we felt maybe it would be a little overwhelming. Josephine will tell you that we usually take turns with our responses although we are always reading each other's PADDs because that's kind of what couples do. I'm sure you'll see my brother and his husband doing that sort of thing. Aren't they just nauseatingly sweet? I hope they're keeping the PDAs to halfway decent.
So how has life with my brother and his husband been for you? Have they been slowly driving you crazy? I feel like Spock would be the overprotective parent. Okay, I feel like Jim would be the overprotective parent because he was like that with me. More like a parent than a big brother.
So, if you haven't been informed yet, this family is a little screwed up. By screwed up, I mean everybody has their own therapist and a few of us are on antidepressants. But hey, we're in treatment, and that's the important thing. Unfortunately, Grandma Winona didn't get there for a while. She was trying, but the first few years after your dad died, she was kind of a mess. Okay, she drank a lot. Jim was the one picking up the pieces. That's kind of what he does. So, he was the one who made lunches and checked my homework. Until Pike challenged him to do better when I was going into sophomore year, and the rest is history.
Anyway, your deluxe care package has been put in the system. Yes, there will be cookies. Okay, I gave it to Liz's friend Cara, who will be doing her semester aboard Enterprise. She's looking forward to it. I personally hope everything is quiet. I feel like all of you can use quiet.
I would ask you how classes are, but that feels like a loaded question. I'm getting ready to take the finals for my summer classes over the next few days and then preparing for the fall semester. Also, getting baby D ready for Starfleet daycare. We're dropping her off a few hours each day to get her acclimated. That's going well. Okay, she threw a duck at somebody when I dropped her off there yesterday, and I had to go to a meeting where babies could not follow. It's a work in progress. At least we're still a few months off from potty training. That's going to be a disaster.
Anyway, write back and feel free to ask any questions you have. I may not have the answers, but I'll find them. I'm also uploading tons of baby pictures. Before the Kirk side of the family stopped talking to Winona, they did take a lot of pictures. I'm partial to the one of your dad holding a chocolate-covered Jim. I never did get the story of how that happened. If you ever find out the truth, please let me know. Jim is so evasive sometimes.
From: W_Kirk_wellness_Hills
To: Spock's_cuddlebunny
Time arrived: 8/28/2260 00:00:01
Subject: How is parenting going?
Hey Jim, this is your mom. Still sober. Although just hearing about everything Ben's going through with his in-laws makes drinking very tempting, but I'm getting through it. Also, alcohol-free brunches with Nhi have been helpful. Although, after her throwing up on me yesterday, she finally acknowledged that she is pregnant. I know you know which is why I mention that. No one else really knows except for the niece who really really hates you. I feel like there's a story there, but I'm too afraid to ask.
Kevin's writing Peter today. We decided it would be best that he only hears from us one at a time. Although, I have forwarded some amazing baby pictures of you and Sam. I can't remember why you were covered in mud and chocolate in most of them. I'm thinking that's because the drinking started a lot earlier than I thought and I wasn't watching you guys like I should. I really should've gone into treatment earlier. I'm sorry.
Anyway, I just wanted to write to see how you were handling all of this. All of this must be overwhelming. However, I know you will be a good dad because you really did raise Kevin due to me being too deep into a bottle to do anything. Your grilled cheese was legendary.
At the same time, I am also worried because this isn't just a new child, but also contending with the ghost of Sam. I'm glad Peter looks like you and not Sam. It's almost easier. You having George's eyes always made things difficult for me when you were little, and that wasn't fair to you. I don't want Peter to have to deal with that type of baggage. No child should feel like they're just a replacement. I feel like I need to apologize for more awful things I did in your childhood because I think there were some moments like that with you.
At least I set a good example of what not to do. You'll do better than me in that regard, I think. You also have Spock. I know I was very negative in the beginning, probably because I knew about him choking you, but I've revised my opinion over time. Also, I'm pretty sure all choking is now very consensual, but never ever confirm that. I don't want to know about your kinks. Just keep it safe, sane, and consensual.
Anyway, feel free to write, and if things go badly, go for the instant messaging option. I hope things don't go badly. Fingers crossed.
From: Peter_K
To: Kevin KR
cc: Elizabeth_Chen
Time arrived: 8/28/2260 18:13:01
Subject: Re: Welcome to the family, at least we give cookies when we screw up.
Classes are okay. I miss my friends from before, but Jay is friendly and kind. Thankfully, he doesn't ask too many questions about why I'm now living with an uncle that I've only recently met. Of course, that makes sense, considering that everybody in my class has lost a parent. Some in the battle of Vulcan, others to their own choices. I guess I'm more like the Ashleys then Jay and Josephine. I don't know if that's a good or terrible thing yet. It just is.
I'm sure Margarita is going to want to discuss it. I've been spending a lot of time with Margarita. We're working on art therapy. She wants me to write as well, in a diary, like Josephine is doing. I'm trying to decide if I want to do that or not.
We got the pictures about three days ago. Josephine says she usually gets pictures from you guys of baby D all the time without context. According to Spock, the images don't go through the same security screening as the letters. I'm a little concerned about the fact that the messages are being screened in the first place.
Jim doesn't know why he's covered in chocolate in that picture. He doesn't remember the incident at all. Spock says that's normal because he would have been only a year old at the time the image was taken. Jim thinks it's from his first not-a-birthday party. Jim doesn't celebrate his birthday on his birthday because that was when his father died. Also, he was always forced to do "soul-crushing" remembrance ceremonies on that day for a man he doesn't even know. So, hey at least Jim understands what it's like to be the child of a dead man. Spock apparently knows what it's like to lose your mom under the worst circumstances. I cry a lot.
I'm still not referring to Jim or Spock as my uncles. I'm not ready yet because I don't really know them that well. We're working on it, but it's a slow process. I don't even know you that well, but Josephine says that you're a good listener, so that's why I'm writing this. Excuse me for rambling. You know, on second thought, I'm not going to send…
From: Peter_K
To: Kevin KR
cc: Elizabeth_Chen
Time arrived: 8/28/2260 18:45:41
Subject: Re: Welcome to the family, at least we give cookies when we screw up.
Voice recognition software is evil. I was trying to delete that email and rewrite it, and instead, the computer interpreted my use of the word "send" as a command. Maybe you shouldn't just turn the microphone on and start dictating when you have a lot to say. We tried recalling, but apparently, that doesn't work very well with Jim's special email system. Jim also said that if I just saved the thing to my draft emails, there would be a 50-50 shot that it would have been sent anyway.
Apparently, that's how Jim and Spock fell in love. I kind of want to hear that story. Maybe I'll ask them tonight to tell me.
They seem in love. Although they are trying to keep the PDAs to a minimum, you can still tell. A few Vulcans lived on the colony, and I know what the finger thing is. Anyway, thanks for listening.
Maybe I should get the diary. There is less of a chance of people reading things I'm not ready for them to see if I write it in hard copy. Good thing, mom felt I should learn to write. This is just one more critical life skill she left me with. I wish she was still here. Excuse me while I cry into my PADD again.
From: Spock's_cuddlebunny
To: W_Kirk_wellness_Hills
Time sent: 8/28/2260 23:12:01
Subject: Re: How is parenting going?
Thanks for writing. Glad the sobriety thing is still working. We are okay, and no, I'm not just saying we are okay because I don't want to give you a genuine answer. I think we are okay for the moment. Only occasional crying jags. Peter came to me for computer help. He is very upset to find out that he can't recall messages through my special email system. Well, not the ones going outside the ship. I think Kevin is going to get an honest response to his email.
I also asked about how Spock and I got together. I gave him the clean version. You're not the only one who doesn't want details. Yes, I will never share them with you.
Seriously, did you guys have to send those pictures? I mean, Spock thinks it's cute that I'm running around naked, covered in mud, but me not so much. Now I'm kind of upset that most of his childhood pictures were destroyed when Vulcan was. I'm still trying to find out if anything was saved on a server off-planet.
Also, I'm still mad grandma Kirk threw away my Captain Marvel costume. I think she threw away all the superhero costumes, but that one was just extra pretty.
Peter is concerned with us only seeing him as a Sam replacement. I think maybe he felt like his mom saw him that way. He's not exactly the most forthcoming child, but I think he felt like she only saw him as the last piece of Sam. I really don't want Peter to feel like that because you're right, it is an awful feeling. I'm glad you realize a lot of what was going on when I was a kid.
I understand why things happened the way they did. I would be an absolute mess if I'd lost Spock. He was a mess when I died, and it was only temporary. I wish that you would've gotten treatment earlier, but it's more important that you're getting treatment now. Margarita says you can't change the past, only the future. Well you can change the past, but you'll create an entirely different timeline, and well here we are with Vulcans being an endangered species, but me and Spock having our shit together.
In a lot of ways taking care of Kevin, Post Tarsus prepared me for this. I'm used to dealing with quite sulky preteens, even before last summer with Jo Jo. I don't feel entirely like I've dived into the deep end. Also, unlike with Kevin, I have Spock, which has been good. He will listen to all my crazy scared rants and talk me through my fears and hopes. I need that right now.
Unfortunately, this situation is bringing back some Sam memories for me. Sometimes I feel like Sam died in my place, and I was supposed to be on Tarsus. I know for sure I was supposed to be on Tarsus, and if I was there, he would still be alive, and Peter would've had his real dad.
But that's not where things are, so I must work in the world I live in. Maybe sometimes I wish things were different, but other days I'm glad they are the way they are. I have Kevin, and I have Spock, things that my other self didn't have.
I'm glad you're there for Nhi. She's going to need it because Christine is not a cheerleader. Yes, don't ever ask me why I don't want to be anywhere near her niece. However, feel free to look at the police report. Or maybe not. I don't want Kevin to have to get you out of lockup if you punch her. It's been resolved and let us never speak of it again.
Anyway, Peter pictures attached from when we were on the Starbase. I may have bought him too much, but it's not like we can go out to the store at any time. I'm probably going to be shipping you guys some artwork. Peter is very productive, and even being the Captain's husband, space is limited.
Anyway, write back when you have a chance.
To be continued