Thank you to everybody who read or review the last conversation. Once again, you are all so wonderful. Our kids are leaving the nest. Obviously, the parents are nervous. There may also be some crying going on.

Day 293: Now Leaving Home

December 11, 2260

Dear Spock:

So, it is 3:32 AM ship time, and I'm writing in my therapy Journal. Margarita would be proud. Or worried. You can never tell with my therapist. Of course, I am having trouble sleeping because this morning, we have to turn our child over to your father for two weeks.

I admit I am nervous. Less so than maybe I would have been before we've spent these last few days with your father, but I'm still apprehensive about being a few light-years away from my child. What if he gets sick without us or your father discovers that Peter has most of my food allergies the hard way. Apparently, this panic means I've gone fully into the parenting role. Or at least that's what Leonard told me last night when you were still talking to your dad.

I guess this means I have completely accepted that Peter is our kid. I think it kind of snuck up on us. I wonder when that happened for Winona with Kevin or Ming with Liz? Was it something that happened quick? Or did one day you wake up in the middle of the night because you had a nightmare about your child getting tortured by all the assholes who made your husband's childhood miserable?

Yes, I know most of those people are dead. The ones that are not are currently in a detention center because of what happened the last time we were on the planet. However, there is still the fact that your sister doesn't have classes with the nicest Vulcans. I feel like they may turn on our kids too. Bigots are never rational or logical.

This might be why I haven't completely searched Peter's luggage for small concealed weapons. It's best to be prepared. We are sending Annie down with the kids for a reason. Apparently, your dad paid for the extra security programming. Although I've heard that sehlat are very protective of their owners. The electronic version has maintained this characteristic.

Okay, maybe I'm having super illogical dreams because Peter has never been away from both of us. Since we've had him, at least one of us has always been with Peter. Even then, he stayed on Enterprise, and we were the ones leaving. I don't want him to be away from us. I trust your dad; I really do. I know I've been the one telling you for days that we will have adequate supervision for all the kids, but my mind is really fucked up. I have a right to be worried. You were kidnapped the last time we were on the planet.

Now that I am a parent, I wonder how hard it was for Winona to leave me behind. Did she regret it, or was she thankful I wasn't there to deal with all of that mess that became Tarsus? I don't know. I am starting to look at her choices differently now, knowing that I am responsible for another life. I am beginning to understand the decisions Winona made back then better than I did at the time. Age and life experience helps.

Yes, Spock bear, it feels weird with me being the apprehensive one who can't sleep right now because I'm the one who pushed for Peter to get to spend quality time with his grandpa on the planet. Maybe I want Peter to have something I couldn't have as a kid.

Relations with the Kirk family were a mess even before our most recent litigation. Grandpa Tiberius was already gone before I was even born. George's mom was a bigot and angry that we got the house. Me sharing a name with her ex-husband didn't help things at all. It didn't get better when she found out I was one of those people. You know what she did that time I dressed up as Captain Marvel. I definitely couldn't spend summers with grandma picking green beans. Not that that would happen with your father because I'm not sure he actually has a garden, but you get what I mean.

Winona wasn't on speaking terms with her side of the family either, so that wasn't an option. Like the Kirks side of the family, they wrote their own tell-all books after George died. Also, my mom's father was a dick.

I never got to do the normal things kids did because my family was screwed up. I want Peter to have as much normalcy as possible despite his parents being dead and being raised by his uncle and his Vulcan husband. Normalcy, in this case, is sending our kids to spend two weeks during the beginning of New Vulcan summer to hang out with his cousin aunt.

Writing that feels more Deep South than what it should be. I blame Leonard.

OK, I'm rambling. That means I definitely should try going back to sleep for another hour.

Love you

XXXX

Dear James:

My father does actually have a garden. However, it mostly consists of various succulents once indigenous to Vulcan. Although he is planning to eventually add a vegetable garden at some point now that he's home throughout the year. Some of the cacti is edible, but my father is trying to grow more first.

Your dream was not illogical because I believe I had a similar dream. It is actually possible that that may have been my dream. We have not done that for a while, but it is not an illogical occurrence. This may be happening because of our mutual anxiety.

I understand your anxiety because I would be lying to you if I said that I was not anxious, and Vulcans do not lie. I've been told it's normal for parents to be concerned when their children leave home despite wanting them to experience the world.

My mother was terrified when I left for Starfleet. However, she still let me go because I needed to make my own way into the universe. Although this is not the same situation, Peter does need to explore the world.

I, too, want our child to experience things that we did not. I spent summers in Canada with my maternal grandfather, although green beans were never involved. But I did not have an easy relationship with my father. Not as a child, at least. I always felt that I could never live up to his expectations. Maybe I want Peter to have the relationship with my father that I couldn't.

At least not then. Over these last few days, I realized he's not the Vulcan I grew up with. Maybe we are not the only ones experiencing the world differently because of our age and experience.

My father has promised to not let any of the children near the learning pods. So, I do not believe they will run into any of my sister's antagonistic classmates. I feel that is best for Starfleet/New Vulcan relations. If something were to happen, I believe that Peter and Josephine can handle themselves in such a situation. This may also be why I did not search Peter's luggage as thoroughly as I should have.

XXXX

Dear Spock:

Snuggle Bear, you lie all the time. Maybe you blame that on your human side. This may also be why you are letting Peter keep all those rings.

Why can't we share sex dreams again? Those are fun. The reliving trauma dreams not as much. I hope you never have to live through a Frank dream. I was worried that my time with Ashley 2 would bring those memories back. Thankfully, it didn't happen.

I also hope the kids don't run into any of your sister's classmates anywhere. But you're right; they can hold their own. We have chaperones there, so we just have to trust that everything will be OK. But if I start crying today, you'll know why.

XXXX

Dear James:

I will not remark on your potential display of emotions because I believe I may have a similar display. Despite the fact we will be joining the children on December 22nd. I believe they can deal with these 11 days on their own. At least we know they will write.

XXXX

"Josephine, are you packed?" Leonard called into his daughter's room at 7:35 AM ship time. The shuttles will begin boarding at 8 AM, and he would like his daughter to at least have a slice of toast before leaving.

"Yes, I just have to switch shoes," Josephine called out from her bedroom.

"And do you have your emergency hydration hypos? Those should be in your travel bag, not in your checked luggage."

"Yes, and the tablets along with the water desalinization kit you're making mom bring," Josephine said as she walked out of her room with her backpack, shoulder bag, and checked bag. He's pretty sure she's bringing half of her wardrobe down for her three-week stay on the colony.

"It's a portable water generator. It's standard Starfleet equipment for missions on a desert planet." Leonard replied. "Are you sure you don't need more clothes?"

"No, we'll have access to laundry facilities."

"You should take this seriously. You can never be too careful when you are traveling to a newly developed colony. Your friends Kevin and Elizabeth learned that firsthand." He knows that the infrastructure is better now than it was during their last trip, but he is concerned. Hopefully, nobody will get kidnapped due to biology.

"I'm sure if a fungus attacks the crops, you'll come to get us right away," Josephine remarked. He doesn't remember her talking back this much before. Maybe this means that she's starting to become more comfortable with him. Or at least they are beginning to undo some of the unseen damage from his ex-wife.

"It was more than that."

"Mom, dad's being weird again," Josephine called out.

"He's protective," Nyota said as she passed a premade breakfast sandwich to Josephine. At least she won't starve on the shuttle. "This is the first time he's going to be away from us in almost a year. Of course, he's going to want to make sure we packed everything we need to be safe on the colony."

"I'm not going to be completely alone. You're coming with me." Josephine commented.

"I'm only going to be with you at night at your grandfather's house. I'm going to be working during the day." Nyota replied.

"I wish I could have been the doctor down there." Leonard lamented. That got him a quick kiss from his girlfriend.

"I know. I wish you could be with us too. However, I think it's good for Dr. Sanchez to be on the field trip. It will be a bonding experience for her and Ashley S. It will give them a chance to strengthen the relationship off the ship," he knows that the relationship is complicated. Being the only other medical team member with a child, Leonard and Sanchez have talked a lot.

"It's getting better. Ashley S is not even freaking out about the potential stepdad who's only five years older than her." Josephine remarked.

"I don't think it's going to end up there." Leonard wasn't so sure. They ended up back together for a reason.

"You never know," Leonard said, passing his girlfriend her overnight bag.

"I know you're worried, dad, but we will be fine. We also need to get to the hangar now for the shuttle."

"Leonard, don't worry. I'm sure Gina will make sure Josephine doesn't try to punch out any of her cousin's classmates when I'm working." She leaned over to give him one more kiss.

"I promise I won't start an interplanetary incident. Even though they deserve it because they are awful." That got a glare from Nyota. "but I will not resort to violence."

"Thank you," Nyota said as they left their apartment.

"You do have everything, right?" Leonard asked.

"Yes, including the extra sunscreen and the respiratory treatments. Although that's not needed because the oxygen is comparable with Earth levels." His girlfriend replied.

"I still worry."

"I know. It will be okay. We'll be in constant communication." Nyota reassured him.

"You will write me after your shuttle lands?" Leonard asked.

"We will write you tonight. Although, I'm not sure you'll get the messages instantly. There could be a day delay." Nyota explained. "We are close, but there's still a bit of a delay.

"As long as it's not a couple of weeks."

"48 hours at most, and that will probably not happen until the Enterprise is at the farther part of the system. We will also send pictures. This is going to be a great experience for all of us. You'll see."

"I hope you're right.

Xxxxx

"Are you sure you have everything? You didn't leave any bags back in the room?" James asked his nephew as they waited to board the shuttle with the other kids and interns. James was definitely looking forward to not having to chase them out of engineering or botany. Scotty might be on the Hamilton right now, but some traditions carry on in his absence. Spock has decided for morale to look the other way with his of age crew-members, as long as it did not interfere with anybody's work. But the underage interns were another situation entirely.

"I have my backpack and suitcase. I also have Annie's charging pad and all of her supplies." Peter replied as Annie followed behind him.

"Although, it is not necessary for you to bring that because we have spare charging pads at the house. Your cousin has her own pet." Spock replied

"Of course, she does. Your dad likes to spoil his kids."

"I was never spoiled."

"Yeah, right, Mr. I never lived in the dorms," James remarked.

"Uncle Jim, I have everything, including the kit that Uncle Bones gave me that mostly consisted of hydration hypos, allergy hypos, and sunscreen," Peter responded.

"You saw the wedding pictures. I came out looking like a lobster." James remarked.

"Due to a recently discovered allergy to an ingredient in the sunscreen you used," Spock remarked.

"That's why the pouch includes allergy hypos. You can never be too careful. The sunscreen is the new one I'm not allergic to. Hopefully, it will be safe for you because we have no idea if you inherited any of my other allergies besides the strawberry one.

"I will make a note of that allergy and make sure Peter consumes nothing in the same genetic family."

"I'll send you some notes. Spock has an entire file with all my allergies." James replied to his father-in-law.

"It is necessary." Especially after they discovered the latex allergy.

"I promise to take excellent care of your child and returned him to your care in the same condition that he arrived." His father replied as he grabbed Peters bags from Spock. He then made his way with the two children to the shuttle.

"That's what we asked for. Honey, I think your dad made a joke."

"Vulcans do not joke."

"You're smirking in your head," James replied as he waved to Peter.

"Live long and prosper, father," Spock whispered as his father, new sister, and child boarded the shuttle.

To be continued…