Thank you to everybody who read or reviewed the last conversation. You are so lovely. I'm so sorry I did not post this weekend. I was at a comic book convention. I got to see George Takei once again. He is lovely as always. Of course, I dressed up as a Starfleet officer. I even got to do an in-person meet-up with other Star Trek fans. It was nice to be at a convention again.

As mentioned previously, I realized with the kids being on New Vulcan, we will be breaking the series' rules a teeny bit. Normally you only see messages to and from the ship. I think the only other time we broke that rule was when we were in Yorktown. But this is a similar situation. I've decided that you will not see the emails written by the kids until they arrive on Enterprise. But you will see the kids' messages as they are being written for people not on the Enterprise. That's what's happening in this chapter. It's the only way I can keep things straight.

The alternate title for this series could be tales from the Enterprise email server. Actually, Epitaphs from Enterprise was going to be a subtitle for a while, but I decided against it. I like Make It up As I Go better as the subtitle anyway. At least it keeps up the music theme from the first two stories.

Day 297: Greetings from An Undisclosed Ship

From: Elizabeth_Chen

To: Peter_K

cc: Kevin KR

Time arrived: 12/15/2260 00:00:01

Subject: Greetings from An Undisclosed Ship

Greetings from an undisclosed ship. I know what ship I am on, but I'm not allowed to tell you. This might actually get to you a little late because it won't go directly to your ship. Starfleet security is weird.

I am severely disappointed that I am the one who you asked about the Kobayashi Maru. Did your uncles not tell you how they met? Or maybe they're afraid to. I feel that as your aunt, I must tell you the story. It's kind of adorable. By now, I'm sure you know that I successfully passed the Kobayashi Maru and was the first person to do so outside of your Uncle Jim. The difference is the version of the test I took gave you a chance in hell.

The original version of the Kobayashi Maru was unbeatable. There was no chance in hell of succeeding. It was supposed to examine how cadets dealt with failure. In hindsight, it really did put people in a mindset where there is no way out. Which can be dangerous. That is why when my mom took over, she changed it. So, there is at least a chance of hell of surviving. As somebody who went through Tarsus, I truly appreciate that.

Okay, my mom also felt that it would be more useful if the Kobayashi Maru was now a class where you looked at great Starfleet failures and learn from those mistakes. I'm willing to acknowledge that maybe I got more out of the course than uncle Jim did, but that's not something that my exhausted self wants to discuss right now.

So your Uncle Jim took the original version of the test. However, your uncle is a Kirk. After surviving the chaos that was Frank, Jim Kirk doesn't believe in a hopeless situation that you couldn't get out of. Why? Because he got out of a hopeless situation. So if the situation is hopeless, what do you do? You change the parameters, of course.

How did Jim change the parameters? Well, per Kevin, he managed to recruit or possibly seduce Nyota's friend Gaila. Rumor has it that Jim seduced her, but recruit is probably more accurate. Your uncle alleged player reputation was much more rumor than actuality. People see what they want to see. Anyway, Jim used Gaila to introduce a new subroutine to the test and beat the stupid thing. Your future Uncle Spock was pissed in a very Vulcan way. It probably didn't help that Jim was an arrogant asshole and was eating an apple the entire time. You have to see it for yourself. I got mom to give me permission to send you the video of the test and security cam footage of Spock's reaction.

Anyway, your future uncle decided that Jim obviously cheated because his test was so unwinnable. BTW it actually wasn't. This was the second version. Apparently, Spock beat the first one, which is actually the version I took. Anyway, Spock took your Uncle Jim to Judiciaries. They met the first time arguing their case in front of your Uncle Jim's entire class.

I've also included a video file of that. Although I will warn you now, your Uncle Spock was a bit of a dick during the hearing and mentioned your grandfather, George. I know for a fact he apologized for what he did. Unfortunately, they are idiots and were possibly engaging in pulling pigtail syndrome. Anyway, before they could strangle and/or start making out, everyone was made aware of the Vulcan distress call. The rest is history.

If you want to know more, ask your uncles. Although, really you should've heard the "how I met your uncle" story from Jim. They were adorable and hopeless simultaneously. So hopeless.

So good news, we are now on our way to see you. Bad news I'm still taking final exams from a starship. I am required to watch the videos of everybody else going through the Kobayashi Maru and write up notes on their performance. Because, of course, I can't get out of that requirement for the class. That would be abusing my privilege as the daughter of the head of Starfleet. We can't give the impression that it is happening.

Thankfully my mom, Ben, and Winona have been watching baby D while we are focusing on school work. I really don't want to keep analyzing everyone else's Kobayashi Maru performance. Especially because I have to keep writing that the participants did badly on the Kobayashi Maru because they were expecting to fail. I don't know if Nyota's mom will accept that. We are just going to have to see if that comment is acceptable.

Once I get done with finals, we will be making our first stop on this trip—surprise ship inspection. I think I'm actually going to function as an officer and not a hanger-on. Tomorrow I will have a couple of classified briefings to bring me up to speed on what's really going on. Although I doubt I'm going to find out everything. I know my mom is keeping some secrets.

I'm glad you're making friends. Chris 2 sounds wonderful, along with Chris 1. I've heard other things about Chris 3, so two out of three is not bad.

My sister and Gina have been friends for a very long time. Even though they are currently having a rough patch, I know they will eventually get through it. I think Gina is just wary because my sister doesn't have the best track record when it comes to significant others. Let's just say I am perfectly happy with her current arrangement because I like Sulu and his fiancé. Trust me, this is like the best we can hope for. I feel like my sister has different emotional needs than other people, and this works for her. What other people think doesn't matter.

When Winona came to San Francisco a couple of days before we left, we went through your mother's belongings that we brought to San Francisco. We had to consolidate things and put everything in the family Starfleet locker. There's like a whole Kirk section right now. We are bringing you a bunch of your best Lego sets.

I also found a very adorable teddy bear. Kevin remembered seeing something almost identical in a picture of your dad and Jim. We then wondered if it was the same teddy bear. We asked Winona, and she burst into tears. So we are 99% sure that your bear was your dad's. Therefore the bear is coming with us. You're never too old for a good teddy bear.

We are also bringing you some of the best items from Sam's action figure collection. Ben thinks we should keep them in storage and in their preservation boxes. Kevin is of the mind that you should at least have them. If you want to keep them on display, they should at least be with you. So we're going with the Kevin approach.

We are also bringing some choice cuts from Sam's comic book collection. Some things that aren't available digitally. There's also a few things of your mom that we thought you would like, such as a couple of jewelry pieces. Of course, we grabbed all the pictures we could find. I'm sure you want these mementos.

We thought you would maybe be interested in some other stuff, but we couldn't bring everything. We took pictures, and Winona said she will ship anything you want to Enterprise or bring it when she comes to the wedding in June. Although if we brought you everything, Uncle Jim might have to get a larger set of rooms. Honestly, they probably need a larger set of rooms. The captain's quarters weren't designed for a command team of the same rank with a kid. It's a unique situation.

Your Uncle Jim is still a Starfleet captain. It is just Jim and Spock are encountering the two bodies' problem; this happens to professional couples a lot. So, your Uncle Jim is working at a position that's slightly lower than what his rank demands because he wants to stay with his husband. Since he skipped over being a first officer and went straight to Captain, he's actually enjoying getting to take this step back and go over all the things he missed the first time around.

If I am doing the math right, you are either preparing to leave for your two weeks on the colony without parental supervision, or you're already on the planet. I'm really not sure how fast these letters are arriving. I know there were some delays previously.

If you are on the planet, how do you like it so far? How are the other kids doing? Are you enjoying time with your grandfather? I never really got that growing up. All my grandfathers were either dead or not on speaking terms with my parents. There's a lot of trauma there that will eventually have to be worked through, but not today.

Anyway, the toddlers say hi. So does Kevin. He would write you a few lines, but he's also buried under essays right now. We could be learning about the ship, but instead, we are doing homework. Homework is miserable. Hopefully, it will be over soon.

Anyway, we will see you soon.

XXXX

From: Peter_K

To: Elizabeth_Chen

cc: Kevin KR

Time sent: 12/15/2260 07:04:01

Subject: Re: Greetings from An Undisclosed Ship

Homework is always miserable, and it's worse when you have fun things you rather be doing. We're working on many assignments, even though this is supposed to be a little vacation. Gina says it's an educational vacation. Reyes Junior said that was an oxymoron. I completely agree. I don't want to be working on a research project about the rise of anti-Asian racism during the great pandemic and the parallels to increases in xenophobic behavior post battle of Vulcan. Not on vacation, at least. Yet, I'm up way too early this morning already doing research.

Obviously, we are on the planet. We have been for a few days. At least long enough that I managed to get a response to my email from Uncle Jim and Uncle Spock, even though Uncle Spock was the dictator. It came through at midnight. I'll respond later.

I now have so many questions about how Uncle Jim and Spock got together. I never got that much of the story before. I knew that their first meeting involved Uncle Jim ending up in Judiciaries. I didn't realize that was tied to the Kobayashi Maru exam. I didn't even know what that was until the picture of you carrying Desi showed up. Uncle Jim and Spock explained everything, including the years it took Spock to develop the test. Although Jim did not mention the subroutine thing. Although thinking back to that conversation, I think he was about to mention it, but Spock gave him a death glare with a double Vulcan eyebrow raise. That's never a good sign.

So, on our first day on New Vulcan, we got to go to the Animal Conservation Center. I sent you pictures of me petting the real live version of Annie. Oh, grandpa got me a robot pet. I think the real ones are a little cuter, but I adore Annie. I'm happy I could have a pet. Mom always said no. Uncle Spock said yes because he thinks it will teach me responsibility. He programmed Annie to behave like a real sehlat, so I will get the full experience.

So Annie's my new teddy bear, but I don't mind having the old one back. I didn't know DD belonged to my dad. That's good to know. Thank you for bringing her and everything else to me.

On our second day, we went to the Conservation Center for plant life. The first half was boring. We mostly learned about the genetic engineering techniques used to replicate an extinct plant species. The second half was better when we got to tour the gardens. I've always loved plants. It was really beautiful.

Today we are touring the farmlands. Chris 1 is looking forward to our day-long discussion about Vulcan agriculture and debating the pros and cons of genetically modified food organisms. I am not. I did spend some of my formative years in Iowa. I know more about corn than I ever really wanted to. I don't know if I want to learn more about the Vulcan species and their efforts to re-create it. Or being forced to grow earth crops in the meantime. Yesterday was enough of that for a lifetime.

Although on the upside, we were supposed to spend the afternoon learning about Vulcan food and do some tastings. Followed by a formal dinner. Good thing I like vegetarian cuisine and was mostly used to it because of colony life. Although I occasionally eat synthetic meat on Enterprise. Fingers crossed, I don't discover any new food allergies. Ashley three's aunt is worried I'm just like my uncle and will break out at any time.

However, I'm not the one discovering new allergies. Chris 3 has already found two new allergies. He's broken out in rashes twice. Honestly, I'm not that upset about it. So, Chris 3 is a dick. He is also a complete bastard and very xenophobic. That's on top of the way he treats Chris 1. So we're already counting down until his mom's next assignment in August. Maybe just maybe, she'll have to leave early when we do the break for the wedding, fingers crossed. Everyone else's parents are definitely planning to stay, though. I'm happy about that.

Oh, before I forget, I did send you pictures from yesterday at the gardens. I'm 90% sure Ashley 2 managed to procure some Vulcan headache medication when the adults were distracted by the cadets. Although honestly, Ashley 3 kind of needs something. We're currently taking bets on when her aunt and her boyfriend will be getting engaged. They are so ridiculous.

I promise I won't try any, though. Jim already gave me the be careful with drugs and alcohol because your grandma is an alcoholic speech. He then said we could discuss Vulcan headache medication when I turn 18.

Normally, I would say write back when you get a chance. Although I have this feeling that you're probably going to get this email after you arrive. Anyway, I look forward to seeing you soon.

To be continued…