Chapter 2: The Disappointment

Esmeralda chuckled as Claude carried her over the threshold.

"You don't have to do this!" She reminded.

"I want to, so there!" Claude responded, quickly kissing her cheek.

Esmeralda blushed happily, thinking she would never get over how good it felt to be loved like this. She wouldn't have asked Claude to carry her inside, knowing how tired he was right now. They were both tired from the long trip they'd taken to get back to Paris. Just now, as they entered the Palace of Justice, it was probably close to midnight. Esmeralda knew Claude was just as ready to fall into bed as she was, but that didn't stop him from making a romantic gesture. This was a loving marriage, and Esmeralda was overjoyed to find herself in it.

Claude put her down when they got to the bedroom.

"I'll be right back." He promised. "I need to look through the mail."

"Working already?" Esmeralda asked with a little concern. "Can't it wait until morning?"

"It won't be any real work." Claude assured. "I simply need to look over it all so I know what kind of work to expect in the morning."

Esmeralda nodded. Something she'd learned since marrying Claude was that he was less stressed when he ended the day with a clear plan for the next day's work. It wasn't always necessary because work wasn't always stressful, but the project that would occupy the coming months demanded as much preparation as possible, so Esmeralda understood why Claude wanted to check that mail before going to bed.

She wouldn't worry about it. Claude was very honest with her, so she didn't need to worry that he'd stay up needlessly late when he'd promised not to. She could just get ready for bed and wait for him patiently.

Claude sighed. These letters were disappointing, to say the least. He wasn't surprised that many of the individuals he'd written to were reluctant to collaborate with him on his new plans, but that didn't make it any less disheartening to look at the pile of letters that proved their negative attitudes toward this change.

He started to wonder how this reform of the courts would ever be accomplished. Claude wasn't going to let it go, it mattered too much to him, but the reality of how much work it would take was starting to settle in.

Well, it was nothing to worry about at this time of night. Claude left the letters on the desk in his study, then started back toward the bedroom, where he knew his wife was waiting for him. Instead of thinking about his work, he thought of how nice it would be to fall peacefully asleep next to Esmeralda.

That thought had Claude smiling when he opened the door, up until he heard Esmeralda's voice cursing.

She was on her knees, leaning over a wash basin on the floor. Her clothes had been tossed to the side along with a few wet washcloths which were reddened with blood. The same blood that she was finishing washing off her hands. Just as she took a towel and started to dry herself, she noticed Claude and frowned.

"It's that time of the month." Esmeralda explained in a defeated tone.

Claude mirrored her expression. He shared the disappointment he knew she was feeling, since this meant she still wasn't pregnant. But he was more concerned about her wellbeing than anything else. This time of the month was an unpleasant time for her, and usually a painful one.

"How are you feeling?" Claude asked with concern.

Esmeralda was finished cleaning herself, so she went to the wardrobe and opened it, finding a nightgown and a clean rag to absorb the bleeding.

"I'm alright." She replied. "But I'm sure the pain will set in tomorrow."

Claude knew what that meant. Esmeralda didn't complain about much, but he knew she struggled during this time. Some months, the pain was such that she wanted to lie down and do nothing for hours. Before knowing her, Claude hadn't believed that menstruation was as bad as women said. But something he'd come to learn about Esmeralda was that she was very strong. She'd endured many difficult things in the time he'd known her, and it took a lot just to get her to complain. Her pain tolerance was especially impressive, Claude had seen that for himself after Esmeralda had been stabbed once. She'd handled that injury remarkably well and recovered quickly.

It was because of her that Claude had lost every idea he'd previously had about women exaggerating this kind of pain. If someone as strong as Esmeralda had such a hard time with it, it was clearly no joke. He was even more impressed with her when he remembered that until recently, she hadn't had the option to lie down for a few hours when cramps were severe. She'd had to manage it while doing chores and dancing for money, working hard through the pain just like all peasant women did. Claude was sorry that his wife had ever had to do that, so he always tried to make this time as easy as possible for her. When the pain did set in tomorrow, he would be the one to make her comfortable.

Esmeralda sighed after putting the nightgown on. She avoided looking at Claude, which made him concerned. What was bothering her? Was it just the annoyance of suddenly noticing that blood? Was it the frustration of still being no closer to having children after three months? Was it something worse?

Claude approached her with a caring expression.

"Are you sure you're alright?" He asked.

Esmeralda glanced at him, barely smiling.

"It's nothing, really." She assured. "I'm just a little impatient. I keep hoping it will be the month that I trade this torment for something happier."

"Soon." Claude assured. "The way we've been trying, I expect it will happen soon. But in the meantime, I'll take care of you like I always do."

Esmeralda managed to smile a little more.

"I love you." She told Claude.

"I love you too." He returned.

Soon. It had to be soon.

Claude reached out to touch his wife when the morning sun woke him.

"Good morning." He told her.

"Morning..." Esmeralda groaned.

"Are you in pain?" Claude asked.

Esmeralda nodded.

"Would you like the usual?" Claude asked.

"Yes, please." Esmeralda replied.

"Right away."

Claude kissed her temple before getting out of bed. He changed out of his nightgown into some casual clothes and went out of the room quickly. First he asked some servants to draw a bath. Then he fetched some breakfast and brought it to Esmeralda, who received it gratefully. When a bath was ready, she enjoyed it. Keeping clean made her feel better when the bleeding was heavy, and soaking in hot water gave her some relief from the cramping. It was a relief to Claude too, seeing her start to smile in the relaxation.

Later, when she was dressed, Claude moved a chair near the bedroom window for her and gestured for her to sit down. She did, and he laid a blanket over her lap. Esmeralda chuckled.

"Claude, you don't have to pamper me this much." She told her husband.

"I want to, so there!" Claude responded.

He kissed her lips, briefly yet sweetly. She smiled.

"Now, would you like me to read something to you?" Claude offered.

"Yes, please!" Esmeralda replied happily.

She was a good reader after plenty of lessons, but when it came to enjoying literature, she liked it best when Claude read to her. She loved the deep, enchanting sound of his voice. Listening to him read was a pleasure.

Claude was always eager to please his wife when she was having a bad day, so he was happy to read to her. He went to the bookshelf and tapped over a few books before finding the one he'd been meaning to read to her. Claude had bought this book for Esmeralda ages ago, but they'd both been occupied with so many things that they hadn't gotten around to reading it yet. Now was a finally a good opportunity to introduce Esmeralda to The Canterbury Tales.

Taking the book from the shelf, Claude turned back to Esmeralda and seated himself in a chair by her. But suddenly, he noticed that her expression had gone from happy to melancholy. Claude worried. Was the pain worsening already?

"Esmeralda?" Claude asked.

Esmeralda looked up at him, attempting to smile.

"I'm fine." She assured.

"The pain isn't getting worse?" Claude checked.

"No, it's not that." Esmeralda replied. "It's just... I didn't think it would be this hard to have a baby."

Claude wished he could say something reassuring, but he really didn't know why this was happening any more than Esmeralda did. He wished he could tell her exactly when their efforts would finally work, but he had no way of knowing that. He didn't know if it would take a few more weeks or many more months. It seemed like they should be able to conceive soon, but that couldn't be known for sure. The most Claude could say was the obvious, that this unfortunate delay didn't necessarily mean anything.

"It can take a while." He reminded. "That doesn't mean it won't happen soon."

"I know." Esmeralda acknowledged. "But... I've seen women get pregnant almost immediately after they were married. And it's not like we haven't been trying..."

Claude frowned.

"It may be disheartening." He admitted. "But that doesn't mean things won't take a turn for the better, soon. Perhaps it just isn't as easy for us as it is for some people."

"What if it's even worse than that?" Esmeralda asked. "What if it's not possible for us? Some people just... Can't have children..."

Claude was filled with a feeling of dread. This wasn't a possibility he'd really considered. Of course he knew that some couples never succeeded in having children, but he'd never been made to feel like this was anything to be concerned about. He'd been taught to assume the opposite, that pregnancy occurred easily. Growing up, he'd even been told that it always became obvious when women were promiscuous because they were sure to become pregnant. The concept of infertility had only been taught to him as a rare disease that a few unfortunate couples suffered. But in reality, it wasn't rare enough that any concern was unfounded. Claude had encountered people here and there who were not able to reproduce despite their best efforts, yet it had never occurred to him that he might be affected by that very struggle.

But if that was the case, it was too soon to know. A wait of over three months wasn't the instant result that some people saw, but it wasn't enough of a delay to indicate futility. There would be plenty of time before that became a real concern, but the reality remained that there was no guarantee of when Claude and Esmeralda would succeed at having a child, if at all. The best thing to do, Claude decided, was simply to keep things in the present.

"We will handle that if we come to it." He promised. "But this is still early enough that we don't need to be concerned yet. We'll keep trying."

Esmeralda nodded. Claude was right, there was no need to start worrying already.

"But personally," Claude continued. "I don't think it will be long now."

"Why do you say that?" Esmeralda asked.

"God has been kind to us." Claude explained. "I think he will be kind to us again."

Neither of them could deny how wonderful life had been recently. They couldn't have guessed that such amazing things would happen, that every conflict would be solved and they would end up happily married with the support of so many. If God was willing to give them that much, it didn't seem like much of a stretch to think he would also give them children.

Esmeralda smiled.

"I hope you're right." She said with fresh optimism. "But no matter what happens, I really am happy with you."

Claude smiled back.

"As am I."

Esmeralda was eager to hear The Canterbury Tales, so she asked Claude to start reading. He obeyed.

"When April with its sweet-smelling showers

Has pierced the drought of March to the root,

And bathed every vein of the plants in such liquid

By which power the flower is created;

When the West Wind also with its sweet breath,

In every wood and field has breathed life into

The tender new leaves, and the young sun

Has run half its course in Aries,

And small fowls make melody,

Those that sleep all the night with open eyes

(So Nature incites them in their hearts),

Then folk long to go on pilgrimages,

And professional pilgrims to seek foreign shores,

To distant shrines, known in various lands;

And specially from every shire's end

Of England to Canterbury they travel,

To seek the holy blessed martyr,

Who helped them when they were sick."

Well, I guess that chapter didn't take very long. I wanted to prepare readers for the fact that I might be slow with the updates, but that doesn't mean I won't be speedy here and there! I'm busy, so I can't guarantee a consistent time frame for updates, but I happened to have a little extra steam to write this one! I hope you enjoyed it!