Midge looked at Lenny with her eyes wide in panic, she saw that he was just relaxing calmly on the bed smoking a cigarette like nothing was wrong, like her ex-husband wasn't on the other side of her hotel door waiting for her to let him in. She sighed, she really didn't want to deal with Joel right now, she had a lot of other stuff to figure out, for instance, how her marriage with her new husband was going to work considering she was still pretty early on in her six-month tour, she knew he'd be willing to wait until she got home but what about something like a honeymoon? What about telling their families— oh god her mother and father were going to kill her.
Joel's knocking took her out of that downward spiral thankfully. She took a deep breath, walked to the door, and opened it slightly, just enough to stick her head out. "What is it, Joel? It's early."
"Midge, it's almost ten, you're usually up for hours by now." He tried to push his way in but she wouldn't let him. "What are you doing?"
"Things change, I work late, go to bed late, sleep late. I'm not fit for company right now, what do you need?"
"I wanted to apologize but I was kind of hoping to do it face to face, not face to door."
"Oh yeah, after last night you owe me more than just an apology, and I'll listen to it, just not right now. Like I said, I'm just getting up."
"Alright, alright, I got another hour before I gotta head to the airport, will you get dressed and meet me downstairs?"
"Uhh…" She trailed off and looked at Lenny who was just watching her, seemingly enjoying her panic, possibly figuring out how to work this into a set, she knew she was going to too. "Yeah, I guess, give me 20 minutes."
"Alright." He said and started to walk away, she was in the process of shutting the door when she heard him stop and say, "Wait a minute."
"Yeah?"
"I know I was drunk last night but I don't think I was imagining it, did I see you talking to Lenny Bruce last night?"
"Uh yeah."
"How do you know him?"
She heard Lenny chuckle quietly. "Oh you know, the normal way you know people, through work."
"Yeah, but I didn't know you two were friends."
"You were there that night at the gaslight, Joel, remember? The first time you saw me perform."
"Yeah, but I didn't know you were actually friends, thought you just knew each other through the comedy circuit."
"Yeah, we're friends." She huffed, she really wanted to get this over with and close the door already.
"Do you, well, I mean, you think you could introduce me to him?" She wasn't sure how Joel didn't hear it when Lenny did what Midge could only term a guffaw but he didn't.
"Yeah Joel, I'm sure I'll be able to set that up sometime. Now go, I gotta get dressed." She was sure they'd meet at some point, maybe a family dinner, maybe during kid drop-offs, she wasn't sure exactly when and she doubted Joel would be real excited about meeting him after he learned the truth but she knew they'd meet eventually so it didn't feel like a lie and she didn't feel bad about saying yes without asking Lenny beforehand.
"Thanks, Midge" She heard Joel say as she was closing the door. She looked out the peephole and saw him walk down the hallway when he was far enough away she breathed a sigh of relief before walking over to the bed, grabbing a pillow, and swinging it at Lenny.
He held his hands up in self-defense and laughed as he said, "Hey, stop it, is that any way to treat your husband? I'm pretty sure this is called spousal abuse!"
"You're a jerk, it was hard enough to keep a straight face as my ex-husband asked me to introduce him to his comedy idol, who just so happens to be my new husband!" She replied while continuing to swing at him.
Lenny kept chuckling, he had the urge to cover his mouth with his hands as he normally would when he found something funny but didn't have the opportunity because he was blocking himself from the pillow that was currently attacking him with more vehemence than he felt when getting shot at while in the war. He waited for his opening and once he found it he lunged forward wrapping his arm around Midge's waist and rolled them around so that she was lying flat on the bed and he was on top of her, one hand on each of her arms that were just being used to attack him. He had a victorious smirk on his face when she realized that she'd been beaten. "Now, Mrs. Maisel, are you ready to surrender and talk without all the violence?"
"Wouldn't it be Mrs. Bruce now?" She genuinely asked.
Those words coupled with the position he found them in and the memory of the kiss they were sharing before they were so rudely interrupted made Lenny want more, his eyes kept flicking to her lips. He heard her breath hitch when he made eye contact with her again, it seemed his wants were written plainly on his face. "Mrs. Bruce, huh? I like the sound of that."
"Mhmm." That was all Midge could come up with at the moment. Normally she was never at a loss for words, fuck, she made her living off of that fact but the look of pure want in Lenny's eyes, along with what she felt gaining in hardness against her hip, she had a feeling she was looking at him the same way he was looking at her. Lenny leaned down slowly, clearly giving her time to stop him. She let their lips meet, she kissed him back and was surprised at how slow and almost tender it was. She was getting lost in the kiss, in his hands that were no longer holding hers, they were now caressing up and down her arms.
She'd been in this situation with different men over her life, okay, so maybe not this exact situation but she hadn't exactly been a virgin when she met Joel, and there had been Benjamin after her first marriage failed so she'd been in bed with a few people over her life. She couldn't help but think this felt different than ever before. She knew it wasn't just because she was attracted to Lenny, and didn't even think it was because she'd been developing feelings for him probably since she met him in the back of a cop car and he insinuated she was a prostitute. She thought maybe it was because they understood each other on a deeper level than anyone she was ever with before, fuck, she had a feeling Lenny understood her better than even Joel did, and he was the father of her children and her husband for years. That thought brought her back to reality, she'd promised Joel they could talk before he left and she knew for sure she wanted to talk more with Lenny before they got so far as to consummate their new marriage. However, it wasn't easy to stop this when even something so small as him running the tips of his fingers over her arm sent shivers down her spine.
"Lenny, She said against his lips and the tone was enough to let Lenny know that she was stopping this from going any further, more's the pity he thought.
He pulled away from her lips and looked at her, "Midge."
"I promised Joel I'd meet him for breakfast, remember? He'll be back up here knocking on the door again if I'm not down there in a few minutes."
He sighed and could tell by her face that he wasn't going to be able to talk her into ignoring the ex even if he did bang on her door. "Was hoping I could get you to forget about that little detail."
She laughed, "Come on Lenny, you're a good kisser, sure, but good enough to wipe all other thoughts out of this brain? You're good but you're not that good." She conveniently chose to ignore that he was doing just that for a little while.
He rolled over so that he was lying next to her instead of on top of her and held both his hands over his heart. He closed his eyes and pretended he was in pain, "Oh, Upper West side, you wound me."
"Eh, I'm sure your ego will recover."
"Well sure but that's only because I know I had you more distracted than you're letting on."
She scoffed and pretended he wasn't correct. "Yeah right."
"I am right, aren't I? And just imagine how much distracting I'll be able to do with less clothes and more exploration."
"Don't get ahead of yourself there, I think there's a few things we're going to have to have a conversation or two before you get any more layers off of me."
Lenny made a show of looking at her from her head to her toes and it made her remember that she was in nothing but one of her satin night gowns. "That's no problem, I'm sure there's plenty of fun to be had with you in that gown." He smirked at her teasingly trying to make sure she knew he was just joking with her, he wasn't one to push where he wasn't wanted, not in these situations anyway, and definitely not with her.
She looked away when she felt her cheeks heat up, she made a show of getting up and going over to the closet where she already unpacked all of her clothes. She wasn't joking, if she didn't get down there soon Joel would be back up here, this time forcing his way in. "So, what are your plans for the day?" The night before was still blurry for her but she thought she remembered him saying he had gigs in town for the next week and he'd be able to catch one of her sets.
"That depends, I gotta gig tonight but that's not till late night, and I gotta phone call I gotta make around noon but other than that my schedule is wide open. How about you?"
At this point Lenny was throwing on his wrinkled pants and shirt from the night before smoking another cigarette, he looked himself over in the mirror and figured he'd have to somehow get at least some of the wrinkles out before his show tonight. Midge was speaking loudly through the closed bathroom door while she was getting dressed and ready for the day. "Well Susie is back in New York working for Sophie Lennon," Lenny could hear the derision in her voice speaking that name, "And I'm on at 8 tonight, other than meeting with Joel, I'm free." She said leadingly.
Midge was not the spir of the moment type of girl, even if her start in stand-up comedy showed otherwise. She did want to try to make the marriage work, and she cared for Lenny but she wouldn't feel comfortable until they talked things out and made at least some plans going forward.
"Right, well I'm in need of a shower. How bout this, I'll go back to my hotel and handle the shit I have to then we'll meet back here for lunch and…talk." He wasn't too fond of the prospect, normally he loved the repartee he and Midge had but he had a feeling this talk wasn't going to be like that at all.
Midge opened the bathroom door looking like her normal perfect put together self, Lenny's eyes widened, she'd only been in there for five minutes tops, and he didn't know how she did it. She smiled at him, "Good, then, if you're lucky and I'm feeling particularly giving, I can get you into the show tonight."
Lenny smirked, "Midge, you can't bullshit a bullshitter, I know well enough you want me to see your act. Last night might be fuzzy but I specifically remember you showing me some of your set so you could get my opinion."
"And you still didn't give it to me."
He shrugged, "And I don't plan to."
She looked like she wanted to argue the point but she caught sight of the time on her wristwatch and sighed, "I'll get you to change your mind, one way or another."
"I like the sound of that."
"Alright, shoo, shoo," She said leading him to the door, ignoring the blush his words caused. "I have to get down there, just come back after you handle your business, okay?"
He turned back to her once he was outside the room's threshold, Midge was standing on the other side of the door holding it open. His eyes flicked to her lips again but he refrained from leaning in, he doubted they were at the kissing goodbye and hello stage, even if he wanted to be. He saluted her, "Aye aye, captain."
She scoffed, "As if you'd know the first thing about following orders."
"Hey, I'm offended, I was in the navy, I'll have you know."
She looked surprised, "You were? Huh, I feel like that's something a wife should know about her husband."
"You know what they say, gotta keep the mystery alive."
"I think that only counts for women."
"Hey, funny you should bring that up now, that's how I got out of the Navy."
"What?"
"Another time, mystery, remember?"
It was clear by the look on her face that she was debating pushing the issue but with another look at her watch she sighed, "Fine but only because I'm in a rush."
He tipped his head in a fake bowing motion, "As you wish, Mrs. Bruce, until later."
He stared at her in the eyes for another few moments, in the way he had a habit of, the way that always drew her in. Now that she wasn't purposely ignoring the feelings his actions brought out in her, she enjoyed the shiver of anticipation that look invoked in her. She curtseyed, copying him, "Mr. Bruce."
He covered his smirk by taking another drag of his cigarette, staring at her still, before finally walking away. She watched him go for a few moments before shutting the door. She stood there, almost in shock as the reality of the situation hit her, she got married last night, to Lenny fucking Bruce. She felt a strange mix of excitement, happiness, and dread. The dread mostly stemmed from how everyone would react, momma, poppa, they wouldn't be happy, not to mention Joel. Also the logistics of it all, where were they going to live? It was only last night that she found out he had a daughter, how old was she? Would the kids get along? Would she even live with them? She hoped so, she saw that Lenny was upset that he didn't see his daughter as much as he'd like.
She shook her head, she didn't have time to freak out about this right now, Joel was waiting for her so she had to get downstairs. Plus, that was what their talk was going to be about, they could work it out together. She sighed, this time it wasn't so heavy, more a calming sigh, she knew it wouldn't be easy but something inside her told her this was right, this would be good, she had a chance of being happy, having a family life, and a career, she could have it all. That they could help each other achieve greatness and maybe even have lov— no, it was way too soon to think a word like that when it came to Lenny. She ignored the voice in her head that laughed at her naivety and the one that told her she was already there.
There was a knock on the door, she rolled her eyes, albeit fondly. She opened the door, "I told you, I have to get down— Joel, hi."
Joel checked his watch for what felt like the thousandth time in the last ten minutes to see only 47 seconds had passed. What is taking her so long? he thought. He knew what her morning routine was like, he lived with her for years so he knew what it was like but when he saw her she didn't have any of her curlers in or anything, it shouldn't be taking her this long. He was considering just leaving, it wasn't as if he wanted to apologize to her, in fact, it was the thing he wanted to do least right now but he knew he fucked up. Plus, he wanted to know how his ex-wife became so chummy with one of the most notorious men in stand-up, a guy who had a rap sheet longer than his left leg.
He checked his watch again, he had just decided he was leaving, he took a few dollars out of his wallet to pay for his drink and was preparing to stand when he caught sight of Lenny Bruce coming out of the elevator, was he staying here too? Joel couldn't help but notice his wrinkled day-old clothes and a crazy thought entered his mind but no, that was just insane. His eyes grew even wider when he heard Lenny tell the doorman that he needed a cab to a motel across town. No, he saw Midge this morning, she didn't have anyone with her, and there was no way she'd let someone see her before she made herself up in the morning, he probably had a few drinks with Midge and then found a fangirl to spend his night with, yeah, that made more sense. Instead of leaving as he'd originally planned though, he decided to check on Midge one more time and see if she was still coming, it'd be rude to just leave without a word, right?
So he made his way back to her room and knocked on the door. "I told you, I have to get down— Joel, hi."
"Midge, is everything alright in here? I've been waiting downstairs for you." Joel said and pushed his way into the room.
"What the hell, Joel? I didn't invite you in here, get out!" Midge said as she planted her hands on his chest and started pushing him out of the room.
He let himself be led but tried to take in as much of the room as possible. He wasn't sure what he was expecting to see but he didn't find it, except, there were two glasses and many more cigarettes the Midge would normally smoke. Then again, she did smoke more when she was drinking. The bed was rumpled, but not disheveled, was that a tie? He wasn't positive because Midge could be strong when she wanted to be and she pushed him out of there quite fervently.
"Well?"
"Well, what?" He asked really not knowing what she was getting at.
"What the hell was that?" She motioned behind her to the door.
He shrugged and pretended like what he did wasn't strange at all, "You were taking a long time, I had to make sure you weren't being held hostage."
"I was getting ready, which I am now. So let's go."
He stared at her long and hard, he wasn't sure what he was looking for. It wasn't as if she'd have a 'recently bedded' sign tattooed on her forehead and from what he remembered, they could have sex and Midge could look perfectly normal seconds later, so he really wouldn't be able to tell. He huffed and let his annoyance show, "Okay, okay, fine but we gotta make it quick, I gotta leave in like 20 minutes now."
Which was honestly better for him, less time he'd have to spend apologizing and groveling, and less time having to listen to her bitch at him and try to convince him that her being gone for so long won't affect the kids too much.
Midge sighed as she made her way back to her room, Joel had been tiring most days recently but today was different, he kept acting like she was hiding something from him, which she supposed she was but there was no way he'd know that. It was an awkward meal and she was thankful it was fast, he said sorry but in a way she knew he didn't really mean it, and she apologized for throwing her comedy career and his lack of one in his face and really meant it because she didn't want to be petty. He brought up Lenny like three times, which she didn't think it was too strange since he had just learned they were friends but he kept asking pointedly, as if he was waiting for her to tell him something more than his answering his actual questions. She shook her head, there was no way he knew what happened, she was just being paranoid. She breathed a sigh of relief happy that the breakfast was over and that Joel was leaving over a thousand miles away.
When she made it to her room she looked at herself in the mirror and decided it was time for an outfit change, she wanted to look good for her meal with Lenny. So she got into her process of finding a new outfit and getting ready, this time not in a rush. It wasn't until she was almost finished that she heard a knock on her door. She smiled and felt silly for the butterflies that came alive in her stomach, she felt like a teenager again being this excited to see a boy. Granted, it was a boy who happened to be her new husband but still.
She opened the door with a smile on her face and couldn't help but to take a moment and appreciate the view, Lenny was always handsome but today something was different, it was like he took extra time getting ready to look good for her. With a suave smile, he said, "Well hello there."
"Hey yourself, aren't you looking dapper?"
"Huh, I don't think that's a word that's ever been used to describe me, not since I was a kid anyway. Not sure how I feel about it, I'm more used to devilishly handsome, dashing, some would even say sexy but dapper?" He shook his head.
"Oh well excuse me, sorry my compliments aren't up to snuff."
"I'll forgive you, on one condition."
"And what is that?"
"You take these from me already, I feel like a bozo just holding them."
Midge looked down and noticed the flowers in his hand, she smiled and took them, this wasn't the first time he gave her flowers but it was the first time he delivered them to her by hand. She inhaled their scent and smiled before opening the door wider and ushering him in, she had to get them in water before they could leave.
"I never asked you about the yellow bears." He said gesturing to the thousands of yellow bears strategically placed throughout the room.
"They were my weird ask."
"Ahh." He nodded, understanding.
"Okay, I think I'm ready, how about you?"
Lenny nodded his head, he hadn't done much in his time away from Midge other than showering and calling Kitty. He spent the rest of that time considering the situation he found himself in, well, that and drinking. He kept wavering from thinking this was a great idea to thinking he was setting himself and more importantly setting Midge up for failure. Fuck, he was out on bail right now from two different states, he made decent money at each of his gigs because he was pretty well known but a lot of that money was going to lawyers, and what was left was being sent to his mother who had been taking care of Kitty and that's not even mentioning when Honey would call and ask for money. The little scraps that were left he used for shitty motel rooms, alcohol, and whatever else he could find that would give him a break from his depressing fucking life. It was clear that Midge was accustomed to a certain lifestyle that Lenny could in no way keep her in. Then again, she didn't seem the type to want to depend on her husband for that stuff, not nowadays anyway, she was doing well enough on her own.
He was in a fucked up catch 22 situation, he made his money from saying things that were controversial but true, things that frankly should just be common knowledge, but those same words were what was taking all his money from him because they kept getting him arrested, paying fines, and paying lawyers, expensive fucking lawyers. He didn't set out to be 'America's controversial bad boy comedian', he just wanted to stand up on a stage and tell jokes and it all spiraled from there. So 'fuck it' he originally thought, if that's what people wanted he might as well lean into it and go all out. He found out the downside to that plan the hard way though.
He knew if he wanted a chance of staying with Midge and not fucking up her life for just being attached to his name he'd have to figure out a way to toe the line. He just had no idea how to do that, he'd been trying to find that line for years. That's why he decided it'd be best to just get an annulment, let her go on her way to become the star he was sure she'd be, and he'd keep doing what he was doing. They had last night and although he knew he wanted much more it was much better for her if they ended it there.
"What's wrong?" He was brought out of his thoughts by Midge asking.
"What? Nothing."
"Oh come on, don't lie to me. You're being quiet, that is something you've never been, not around me anyway. Broody, yes, definitely, but not quiet."
"Broody? I do not brood." He said sounding offended.
"Sure you don't." She said with a roll of her eyes before changing the subject. "So, where do you want to eat?"
"I know a little place not far from here," Lenny said, if they were going to actually talk they'd need some privacy, and being in the same building as all of the people on tour with Midge was not a great idea. Plus, the restaurant was cheap and had even cheaper liquor which he was sure he was going to need.
"You come here often?" She asked somewhat surprised that he knew specific spots since this was only his second night here, she'd been here a week and only left the casino long enough to shop.
"Yeah, Vegas is debauched enough to keep inviting degenerates like me back. Plus it's only a four-hour drive from L.A. so I came here a lot when I was staying there."
She laughed and wrapped her arm around his while they were walking. "You're not a degenerate, Lenny, don't be ridiculous."
He laughed, "Try telling that to the papers, or the police, and definitely the presiding judge on my upcoming case. Hell, try telling my mom that."
She looked at him and saw that under his smile and laughter, he was serious. Serious and tired. "Yeah well, they're all idiots. Except your mom, don't tell her I said that, if she's going to be my mother-in-law that'd be a terrible first impression. Hey, what does she think of you being a comic? Will she hate me and my career choice?"
He looked down at her as they were walking down the street, she had a feeling he was deciding if he even wanted to answer that question and that didn't feel great. Eventually, he must have decided to answer honestly. "She told me I was an idiot but supported me, she was a comic herself."
Midge's eyes opened wide, other than Sophie Lennon she'd never really interacted with another female comic. "Would I know her?"
"Nah, she's in California now mostly focusing on Kitty. She was in a few movies, none you'd have ever heard of." He wasn't normally this open and didn't particularly like the feeling. He decided not to mention that one of the movies that his mom was in was the first movie he ever made, knowing Midge she'd look it up and he didn't want her seeing that.
It took Miriam a moment to understand what he was saying, she realized that Kitty must be his daughter's name. She knew she wanted to ask him more about this but by the closed-off look on his face, she decided it'd probably be better to bring it up later because she didn't think she'd get any more answers out of him right now. He was confusing her a little bit, he seemed uptight and upset, she knew it was a spur-of-the-moment thing, them getting married last night but she was starting to get the feeling he was regretting it. That thought hurt more than she was willing to admit. She didn't know what changed between this morning and now but she was damn sure she was going to find out. She had a feeling he was someone to get too lost in his thoughts and spiral, he was a lot like her in that way. Well, she could handle that, she could talk him down off the ledge, and that's exactly what she planned to do. She stood up straighter with a renewed sense of purpose. She refused to even think of the possibility that he was the one in the right and she was the one that needed to be talked down. No, something inside her told her this was right and she was one to trust her gut.
He rested his hand on her lower back as he stopped walking and opened the door to a hole-in-the-wall place she almost didn't even notice. She let herself be led and noticed when he nodded his head at the guy behind the bar before sitting down in a corner booth that was the perfect spot for a celebrity who didn't want to be noticed. It was out of view in a dark corner. She had the idle thought of wondering why someone who made his living off of being seen and speaking his mind worked so hard to stay out of the light when he was off stage.
They sat and she stayed quiet while he rifled through his pockets for his cigarettes, took the one he offered her, and leaned forward when he lit his lighter and held it out for her. She took her first drag before pulling the cigarette out of her mouth and exhaling while watching him. He took out his own cigarette, lit it, and took a drag.
On his exhale he said, "Listen, Midge…"
"No." She interrupted.
"No?" He asked sounding a mixed of confused but also delighted by her audacity.
"That's right, no. I know that face Lenny, that's the face of a man about to break up with their gal. So I'm preemptively telling you no."
"Midge, I don't think you understand what you're trying to sign yourself up for…"
"What I already signed up for." She interrupted again.
"Yes, but you were not clear of mind. You weren't sober enough to make a decision. Fuck, you didn't even remember we got married till we saw the ring."
"Lenny, I want this, it's as simple as that. Do you?"
Lenny stared at her for a very long while, he was surprised, he knew he'd wanted Midge since almost the first moment he met her, that wasn't even a question. And it wasn't even that he just wanted to sleep with her, which of course he did, it was more than that though. But this wasn't about what he wanted, he had to stop this for her.
"That doesn't matter…"
"It's the only thing that matters. Now answer the question."
"Yes." He finally answered with a sigh of defeat, he wasn't going to lie, and he wasn't the type to let an opportunity slip through his fingers, he had to make sure she knew what she was getting into with him though.
"Good then, it's settled."
She was surprised when he reached over the table and took her hand in his. He opened his mouth to speak but the waiter took that moment to come over and bring them their menus. "Can I get you two something to drink while you're looking over the menu?"
Lenny was going to ask for some scotch or something of the like but Midge answered first, "We're celebrating, how about a bottle of your finest champagne."
"Very good, I'll be right back with that."
"Celebrating, huh?"
"Well yeah, we're newlyweds, remember? And we've got a week in Vegas to celebrate."
"Okay, just let me say one more thing and if you still wanna do this, do us, then I won't bring it up again."
"Okay."
"You get I don't have a lotta money, right? I've never spent a night on the Upper West Side, hell, I've never made it past midtown. All my money goes to my lawyers and my kid, the ex sometimes too. For all I know I could get arrested tonight and wind up kicked outta Nevada by morning. I've been known to partake in some unsavory habits too." He laid it all out there, let her know all the shit she'd have to deal with when it came to him. She only ever saw him out on the town, working, having fun, she never saw him scrounging for change through his couch to pay the phone bills.
She stared at him seriously in the eyes for a long time. He was sure any moment she'd pull her hand out of his, get up out of the booth, and walk out of his life for good. He rubbed his thumb over the back of her hand savoring the last few moments he had with her waiting for her to make her next move. He was surprised when a big smile came over her face and she leaned over the table and planted her lips on his. He started to follow her lips when she pulled away but stopped himself.
"I'm all in so I don't want to hear another word of protest. Other than our gigs at night this next week is officially our honeymoon, so be ready for some fun, Mr. Bruce."