Chapter 9

After All

"KCLA Studios?" Jack said into the phone receiver. "Yeah, I'd like the extension to file a complaint. The names Tripper. Jack Tripper. Maybe you've heard of me, maybe you haven't. I own a restaurant downtown called Jack's Bistro and I – No, I will not hold. I am a sponsor and it is my right, nay, my duty to notify you that the host of your show, Cooking with Guy, is satisfactory at best and horrendously amateurish at worst and – hello?"

The only response Jack received was the muzak version of "The Girl From Ipanema" droning into his ear.

"You know what," he added to no one in particular, "I've decided that I will hold, actually, so thank you for the courtesy."

The muzak continued to play, irritating Jack further. He hit the phone against the kitchen counter in angry succession before putting it back to his ear, huffing as he waited. Janet walked into the room and made eye contact with him, her eyebrow raised. He held his hand up to assure her he had everything under control, but she appeared unconvinced.

"What's going on in here?" she asked.

"I've got everything under control," Jack reiterated out of the side of his mouth as the dulcet saxophone continued to worm its way into his brain.

"You've got what under control?"

Jack sighed. Why was she being so nosy? "Look, it's my obligation as a chef and restauranter to ensure that our local community isn't being duped by hacks and amateurs. Let me handle this, okay?"

Janet opened her mouth to protest, but rolled her eyes and gritted her teeth instead. "Jack, are you calling the studio again?"

"I'm gonna get through this time. It's fine," he assured her.

"Oh, come on, Jack, you've been obsessing over this all week. Don't you think it's time to give it a rest? Besides, since when do you care so much about Guy Frisco and silly cooking shows anyway?"

"Ah-ah. Guy Frisco is silly. Cooking shows are not silly," he corrected her, raising a finger. "Cooking shows are informative and educational as long as the chef is – "

"...good looking and at the top of his game," Janet repeated alongside Jack, having heard this same speech multiple times already this week.

"Exactly. And Guy Frisco simply doesn't meet those qualifications. He's got sous chef written all over him, Janet. It's not right."

"He's not that bad Jack, I mean come –"

Jack glared back at her and she raised her hands in surrender.

"Look, I know you've always been a little jealous of Guy, but you know it's not just about talent. He must've just been in the right place at the right time. He's no better than you are."

"Thank you, sweetheart, and that's very nice of you to say, but it's very important to understand that I am not jealous. I'm merely...a concerned citizen. Hello?" The muzak stopped and a man's voice spoke on the other end of the receiver.

"Jack Tripper?" he asked.

"Yes, this is he."

"Stop calling us!"

"Wait! Wait don't hang up! Please, don't hang up. I'm uh...an acquaintance of Hank Ross."

"No, you're not," the man responded confidently.

"Alright. Okay. If I don't know him, then how do I know that, uh, he won't touch a scotch younger than 25 years?"

"Everybody knows that."

"Okay," he fidgeted. "Okay, fine. What if I told you that I know that he..." Jack paused. This was a shot in the dark and it might backfire, but it was all he had in his arsenal at the moment. "What if I told you that I know that he spoke to Dave Wallace and they're ready to bring the Guy Frisco Show to the next level?" When there was no response, he continued, "That's right. I know that he's ready for more specials and bigger, flashier shows. And that he, and I quote, wants that host of yours to 'make love to the public eye.' Huh? How about that?" Jack grew more confident with each word.

"How the hell do you know about that speech?" the man grew suspicious.

Jack smiled. He had him now. "I told you. I know Hank Ross."

"Jack Tripper. From Jack's Bistro?"

"Yeah, that's me," he beamed.

"And if I got Hank Ross on the line right now, and understand that that is not happening by the way, but say I got Hank Ross on the line to speak with you right now. Would he know who you are?"

"S...sure he would."

"I think he would too. Do you know why?"

"Why?"

"We've been sending scouts to area restaurants. We're looking for potential guests on our show. Yours got passed over. Too plebeian. So long, Mr. Tripper."

The line clicked and went dead, and Jack was left to stand in silence, speechless.

"Jack..." Janet, who'd stood there during the entire conversation, prodded softly, noticing the way his face fell.

"I don't want to talk about it," he replied, his voice monotone.

"What did they say to you?" her face was full of concern.

"Does it matter?" he snapped, turning some of his anger onto her. "No matter what he said, I'm still just some guy who runs a mediocre restaurant in a mediocre part of town. Why would anyone take me seriously?"

"Jack," she said, trying not to let him get to her. "You know that's not true. You're the best chef there is!"

"It's not about how good of a chef I am. I know I'm just as good as the best of them. It's the fact that despite any talent, I've got nothing to show for it."

"Nothing?" she asked, taken aback.

"Not a damn thing."

Janet glared at him, growing angry, and took a moment to collect herself. "Not a damn thing? Really, Jack? Because the Jack Tripper I met nearly 15 years ago would be ecstatic to have his own restaurant, don't you think? A restaurant with his name on it, with a menu he created?

"Well maybe that's not enough anymore!"

"Your restaurant makes a profit and feeds your family. How is that not enough, Jack?"

"Maybe I want some recognition for all the hard work I've put into this. Have you ever considered that? I've worked hard for this my entire adult life and all I have to show for it is some dorky award from five years ago. Big whoop."

The disappointment was clearly growing on Janet's face, but Jack was too tense to let it get to him. "That award used to mean a lot to you," she said softly.

"Maybe I want people to know my name," he muttered, knowing how stupid it sounded but not caring. "Maybe I want to matter."

Janet shook her head, incredulous. "You matter to me, Jack. You matter to us." He stood there stubbornly looking away from her, examining the tiles in the kitchen floor like a coward. He knew how terrible this all must sound from her point of view. But he was powerless to explain any of it to her.

When it was clear he wasn't going to say anything back to her, Janet continued. "What is going on with you lately, Jack? Where is all of this coming from all of a sudden?"

"You wouldn't understand," he said quietly, still looking away from her.

"Try me," she said, matching his tone. She was willing to be just as stubborn as he was being.

"I am trying. I'm trying really hard, Janet. I wish I could tell you everything, but I promise you I'm trying to make it all make sense."

She had no idea what he was talking about, but it was beginning to sound to her like he was either having a midlife crisis at best or a mental breakdown at worst. She didn't want to poke at the fire and risk making it worse, but she also wasn't willing to let his behavior go. Not when it seemed to keep happening. "Are you happy Jack?" she pressed further, fearing the answer.

He took a second to respond, then finally turned to look at her. "I don't know. I've barely had the chance to figure that out."

Janet groaned, frustrated. "What does that even mean, Jack?"

"It means!" he said, slightly raising his voice. "I don't know what it means!"

"Well. I'll tell you what it sounds like it means to me," she said, raising her own voice. "It sounds like it means that you think your life is nothing but a giant disappointment, and that includes me, and your job, and your children. It sounds like it means that none of this is good enough for you anymore. Is that it, Jack?"

"What? No! That's not – that is not what I said – "

"Then say something! Say anything just please tell me what's going – "

It was at that moment that Janet realized that Jamie had entered the room. Jack's eyes followed Janet's as they landed on their daughter. She looked up at them, her face a mixture of confusion and disappointment. "Why are you guys fighting?" she asked, the concern evident in her voice.

"Oh sweetie," Janet immediately softened, walking over to Jamie and kneeling down to give her a hug. She glared over her shoulder at Jack, as if to say, 'now look what you've done.' Jack sighed and bit his lip as the guilt set in. He locked eyes with his daughter as she pulled away from Janet.

"You shouldn't fight!" she scolded him.

"I'm sorry," he said softly. His eyes were sad.

"You're right, honey. Mommy and daddy were just having a little argument. Everything's alright, okay?" Janet added.

She took in a deep breath, then slowly let the air out through her mouth, as if she'd been specifically taught to breath this way when she was stressed. "Very immature. And disappointing," she added, looking directly at Jack after that last word. "You still got lots to learn," she added, then turned on her heel and walked out of the room.

"Lot of...lotta big words coming out of that one," Jack cracked once she was gone, trying to lighten the mood.

Janet didn't miss a beat, turning back around to face him. "Are we finished here? Do you think you can manage tonight, or do you still have more phone calls to make?"

Jack racked his brain. "Wait, what's tonight?"

Janet let out a breath, muttering underneath it. "Karaoke night with Terri and Larry. I'm not a fan of the idea, but it was their turn to pick."

"You're kidding!"

"You're going!"

The finger that Janet had jabbed into his chest followed her out of the room, and he was left to ponder what had just happened. He hadn't meant to snap at her, he just...found it difficult to hold in the anxiety he was harboring. It wasn't exactly easy to pretend to be a different version of yourself, one that had led a completely different life for the past seven years. There was so much to keep up with – he was constantly learning new information every single day.

And what's more, he struggled to get a grip on the magnitude of emotions he was experiencing. Being thrust into an established relationship with Janet when his feelings had been complicated and repressed for as long as he'd known her was...a lot. Losing the career he'd poured everything into in order to avoid his feelings was also a lot. No matter how wonderful it'd been being with Janet, it was difficult to shake what he'd lost in the process. And hiding his anxiety over that fact wasn't easy. Was the other version of himself like this? Maybe he'd made the right decision all those years ago. Maybe Janet was better off without him. Maybe it had all been for the best.

He just wanted one thing about this new life feel familiar.

He knew, of course, that the familiar constant was Janet. Looking at her when he felt like this was hard. Just looking at her caused every negative thought he was having to shatter. But he couldn't risk growing too comfortable. Not when he knew he'd eventually lose it all again. Not being on the same page with her, not being able to tell her the truth...that had never been who they were. He was supposed to be closer to her than he'd ever been before, but it was a lie and she didn't really know him at all. Not like this.

The only person who was in on his secret was a five-year-old child, and now he'd disappointed her, too. Besides, what was he supposed to do, confide in her that even though he had everything he'd ever dreamed of, he couldn't enjoy it because it felt weird? That wouldn't even make sense to a grown adult. It certainly didn't make sense to him.

He huffed and glared at the phone, still hurt, still angry. And he was going to channel that hurt and anger into some dumb, cheesy song because of course Larry had to find an excuse to sing in front of strangers.

...

Jack had never been to nor had he ever heard of Bubbles, the first bar dedicated to karaoke in the area. In fact, he'd never done karaoke before in his life. And he'd been planning on keeping it that way until today when he'd been informed that he actually had no choice in the matter. And so, with tension still hovering in the air around them, he and Janet found themselves driving downtown to meet Terri and Larry for what Larry had promised, "is actually really fun. Trust me."

Janet, who now wore a lighter style of makeup than she had when they were younger, had decided to use the occasion to go back to her roots. He thought she looked beautiful either way, and as angry as he still was, he couldn't help but notice how the light hit her lip gloss or the way her large eyes popped underneath her long lashes. He thought it was very rude of her to look that beautiful when he was still too busy being very, very upset.

The only words they uttered to one another on the way there involved short, neutral sentences. "Did you remember to lock the door?" "Yes" "You don't think your mother will fall asleep before the kids again, do you?" "No." Soon, they were pulling into a humble but decked out venue, its exterior decorated with Christmas lights, neon beer signs, and a surprisingly true to life statue of Elvis on the roof next to the 'Bubbles' sign.

Inside, Terri and Larry waved them over. Jack took in the cramped space, the cigarette smoke that was so thick you could barely see through it, the rows of chairs, the bar, the blue and pink lights focused on the small platform stage. In the corner was a machine with a screen facing away from him, toward the brave soul that was poorly singing what sort of sounded like 'Straight Up' by Paula Abdul. He instantly wanted to go home. Instead, he excused himself to go to the bathroom to, he guessed, splash some water on his face or something.

"What do you think of the place?" Terri asked Janet, who'd been apprehensively eyeing Jack as he made his way to the bathroom, as she handed her a drink.

"It...certainly has a lot of character," Janet lied through her smiling teeth.

Terri read right through her. "Okay, I know it seems kind of divey but Larry and I came a few weeks ago and we had a great time. It might take a drink or two, but I promise you'll have fun."

"Alright, alright," Janet conceded. The tension from Jack that was rubbing off on her was fading and Terri's contagious enthusiasm was taking its place.

"And what's more," Larry said, butting in. "The crowd here? Loves ol' Larry. Tell her about last time, sweetheart."

"Last time? Uh..." Terri sputtered.

"Still speechless, huh?"

"Yes, that's it. I am still speechless. Your voice...it's just so...so..."

"...there are no words!" Janet finished for her.

"Ah, you girls are too kind. Absolutely right, but kind. Now if you'll excuse me," he said, before dramatically walking away, as if on a mission.

"What was that all about?" Janet asked Terri.

"Well..." Terri began, her emphasis on the word producing a sound that sounded more like 'whale.'

Janet winced. "Did you pay your coworkers at the hospital to pretend to like his singing again?"

"...Kind of. Only this time they weren't my male coworkers.

"You mean..."

"Janet, the man thinks he is Tom Jones. And I don't have the heart to tell him that he's, well, not. And my friends couldn't make it this time so I really need you and Jack to come through. He's so excited and it's so sweet and I..."

"It's okay, Terri," Janet stopped her, disregarding her own disgust at any description of Larry as 'sweet.' "We've got you. Well, at least I do. You might have to use an actual set of pliers to pry a smile onto Jack's dumb mouth."

"Oh no, don't tell me he's still acting like a total jerk," Terri rolled her eyes.

Janet paused and gathered her words. "It's like things that didn't seem to matter to him before suddenly matter. I thought he was happy and then out of the blue he decided he's not. I don't know what caused it, or whether something happened and...I don't know, a part of me is worried it's something that maybe I did..."

"Hey, do not blame yourself for Jack acting like a big, whiney baby! We both know him by now. He just does this sometimes, right?"

"But it feels different this time, Terri!"

"Well, I'm sure it's fine! Unless that no good, two-timing tramp Colleen Stevens finally got to him..." Terri stopped abruptly and caught herself. "I mean, but I'm sure it's not...because he wouldn't..."

"Terri!"

"Look at me just saying things! I just say things sometimes!" Terri sputtered, attempting to brush off the suggestion.

"Terri, he is not having an affair with Colleen Stevens, okay? In fact, our sex life has never been better. That's what's so strange about all of this. One minute he's acting miserable and the next he acts like we're newlyweds. I'm worried about him!"

"I know! But look, I wouldn't worry too much, honey. Whatever it is that's bothering him, I'm sure it will pass and he'll be back to being the same old Jack. In the meantime, if whatever it is that he's trying to work out makes your life too much of a living hell, let me know so I can break his thick skull. Speaking of thick skulls!" she changed her tone, noticing Jack coming back toward them.

"Hi, Terri," Jack said awkwardly. "Janet can we, uh...look I..."

Before he could finish, the lights went dim and the room grew silent. Everyone in the bar turned their heads toward the stage as an upbeat guitar riff began playing on a loop. Just as it seemed like it was going on for far too long, Larry, in a severely outdated, navel cut, sequined top (collar popped), gold chain, and outrageously large belt buckle strung through his tight black jeans, burst out from behind the curtains.

"Well, she's all you'd ever want, she's the kind I'd like to flaunt and take to dinner," he bellowed terribly, gesturing toward Terri.

"Oh my god," Janet and Terri monotonously muttered under their breath at the same time.

"Well, she always knows her place, she's got style, she's got grace, she's a winner," he continued singing, walking off the stage and toward Terri. "She's a lady," he spoke-sang as he tilted her chin up toward him, gazing into her eyes. "Whoa, whoa, whoa, she's a lady."

Terri briefly winced at Janet before turning back to Larry. She plastered on a smile as he pulled her up on the stage and continued alternating between singing the song's lyrics and dramatically speaking them. She turned back toward Janet and Jack, mouthing "please! Please, please!" as a reminder to the two of them to play along. Janet exchanged a glance with Jack, who seemed to catch on. He was so stunned that he seemed to completely let go of whatever it was that had been bothering him.

With Terri perched on a chair, Larry danced around her, confidently performing the Tom Jones staple. The embarrassment that she initially seemed to feel gradually melted away as he continued to sing. Jack couldn't help but note how sweet it was that despite her initial reaction, he could tell just by looking at them that she clearly seemed to care for Larry so much that she could let it go. At one point, somebody booed, and Terri yelled at him to "shut up" before looking back up at Larry, hearts in her eyes.

Jack looked back over at Janet, who was laughing now and clapping along. It was the first time he'd seen her smile all day, and he knew that had been his fault. He extended his arm and held out his hand. She turned, looking first into his eyes, then down at his hand. Hesitating only briefly, she looped her fingers through his before he lifted their clasped hands and kissed hers.

"Take your shirt off!," he called up at the stage, throwing his voice and mimicking a woman's voice. "You're so sexy!"

Janet nearly spit out the drink she'd been nursing, laughing through her fit of coughs. She playfully whacked Jack on the arm after she gathered herself. "You're laying it on a little thick, Jack!"

Larry, who couldn't see from his vantage point, nodded at the audience. "Sorry ladies!" he yelled back, in between 'whoa whoa whoas,' "I'm off the market."

Jack smirked back at Janet. "Just helping out a friend."

She smiled back, playfully rolling her eyes. "You feeling better?"

He briefly looked away from her, his eyes downcast. "Yeah, never better," he lied.

Janet rubbed his back, seeing right through him. "I'm here, Jack. Whenever you're ready to talk."

He looked back over at her, his smile genuine this time. "I know."

"I know that what you're feeling right now is –"

Before Janet could finish, a new song had begun. Larry and Terri were singing a duet now, the audience genuinely eating it up this time as a result of Terri's natural charisma.

"You've been around for such a long time now, oh maybe I could leave you but I don't know how. And why should I be lonely every night when I can be with you oh yes you make it right," Larry belted the Tracey Ullman cover of 'They Don't Know.' Terri picked up the next line, singing, "And I don't listen to the guys who say that you're bad for me and I should turn you away 'cause they don't know about us and they've never heard of love." Jack and Janet exchanged glances, unaware up until now that she could sing like that.

It was odd, Jack observed, watching the two of them profess their love to each other up there on that little stage. Never in a million years would he have ever guessed that Terri and Larry of all people could fall in love, but here they were, so crazy about each other that they were at complete ease yelling it to the world...or at least the dozen or so other people in the room.

"Why should it matter to us if they don't approve? We should just take our chances while we've got nothing to lose," the words swirled around him. Everything seemed so open and honest with Terri and Larry. Maybe that's why it worked. Neither of them had ever been the type to hold back anything or mince words. It was something that he and Janet clearly had trouble with, both in this universe and the next, and it was becoming clear how painful that could make things for them.

Jolted by the emotion in the room, Jack impulsively grabbed Janet's hand and pulled her toward the stage as Terri and Larry reached the end of the song. He had his pride after all, and he wasn't going to let Terri and Larry show them up.

"What are you doing?" Janet asked.

"We're up next."

"What," she said, a statement and not a question.

"Just trust me, okay?"

"But Jack!"

He put one finger to his mouth and raised his other to indicate that everything was fine.

"Maestro, give us the most romantic duet you have on tap," he said to the uninterested looking teenager who was serving as the karaoke DJ.

"Uhh...sure. You guys like Cher?"

"I don't really think –" Janet began.

"We love Cher! Who doesn't like Cher, right pumpkin?"

Janet pursed her lips and glared at him before she finally relaxed her posture and gave into the idea that they were doing this. "Alright. Sure. Fine," she relented. "Cher it is."

"See? I knew you could – " Jack began, then abruptly cut himself off as Terri pulled him onto the little platform stage and he laid eyes on the growing number of people in the bar. He found himself suddenly frozen and it took him a second to notice Terri handing him his microphone. "Huh? Oh. Uh. Thanks. Look, I think I changed my mind. I don't know if this is such– "

Terri patted him roughly on the back. "Go get 'em, tiger. I'm proud of you and your thick skull."

"Huh?"

She sarcastically beamed at him before walking off stage with Larry, leaving Jack and Janet both frozen in place.

The music began to play and Jack looked over at the screen, the words "After All (Love Theme From 'Chances Are' by Cher and Peter Cetera" glaring back at him. He didn't know this one. Shit.

"Can we try another – " he began, turning toward the kid, but Janet lightly jabbed him in the ribs to indicate that it was his turn to sing, while she awkwardly smiled at their audience.

"W-well here we are again," he began, speaking more than singing and speeding up his words to catch up with the music. "I guess it must be fate." He winced at Janet as if to ask 'corny?' She pried her eyes from the audience, still quite frozen with stage fright, to mouth 'what?' He turned back to look at the screen. "We've tried it on our own, but deep inside we've known, we'd be back to set things straight."

The words felt personal, too personal, like someone was playing a trick on him. Like the universe was toying with his emotions. He looked back over at the kid at the controls, but he was no longer a kid. That was Doctor Prescott, waving over at Jack and smiling. His heart began to race, everything happening in seconds before he had a chance to react and then –

Janet's voice. It wasn't a strong voice, and she wasn't a particularly great singer, but it was soft, and gentle. The same voice that had provided him with words of reassurance, and comfort, and tenderness for as long as he'd known her. "I still remember when," she began, her hand reaching for Jack's and finding it while she continued to stare out at the audience. "Your kiss was so brand new. Every memory repeats. Every step I take retreats..."

Dr. Prescott indicated to Jack that it was time to join back in, and, briefly gritting his teeth at him but doing everything in his power to not jump off the platform and murder the man, he sang along with Janet, "Every journey always brings me back to you."

They went on like that, Jack half-singing half-speaking, Janet's voice so soft you could barely hear her, and Dr. Prescott taunting Jack from the side of the stage. Jack tried to remain calm, he tried to stay in the moment without Dr. Prescott or the words of the song distracting him. But he was well aware that he was still in the throes of some sort of cosmic lesson, and Dr. Prescott was clearly here to remind him of that fact. And so, apparently, were Cher and Peter Cetera.

"After all the stops and starts, we keep coming back to these two hearts. Two angels who've been rescued from the fall. After all that we've been through, it all comes down to me and you. I guess it's meant to be, forever you and me, after all."

At one point during the song, everybody in the room, save Janet and Dr. Prescott, seemed to disappear. Maybe the cigarette smoke had grown thicker, or maybe it really was just them. Janet didn't seem to notice, far too busy pouring all of her effort into this song. And he, not a performer, not a singer in any sense of the word, getting more and more into it until it seemed like he knew the song like the back of his hand, like he'd known it his whole life.

"Alright, Jack!" Dr. Prescott called over the crescendo of the karaoke style guitar and drums. Jack ignored him, joining Janet in putting everything he had into this damn song and then...

It was over. The lights seemed to snap back on and everybody else in the room returned, stunned, staring from their seats for a moment before erupting into applause, Larry using his fingers to whistle in celebration while Terri shouted and "wooed" her approval.

Jack and Janet turned toward each other, shocked in their own right at what had just happened. After a moment, he turned and grabbed her and spun her around in a celebratory embrace.

"I love you," he mouthed, his voice drowned out by the sound of clapping and cheering.

"I love you," she mouthed back.

They smiled at each other, taking in the moment, shaking their heads and laughing off their nerves. As they began to move to make their way back among the audience, Jack turned to look back at Dr. Prescott – but he was gone, the uninterested, sleepy looking teenager back at his post once more.

...

The drive home proved to be much more pleasant, their discussion jumping from Larry's ridiculous get up and the audience reaction, to how it felt to be up on stage, terrified out of their wits, and yet energized...alive.

Janet's eyes sparkled as she recalled their performance. "Did you feel it?" she asked. "The way everything just seemed to...stop?" She looked over at him, smiling with her eyes. He returned the gesture briefly before turning back toward the road.

"Yeah," he smiled. "I did."

She sighed contentedly, and then there was a momentary pause. Jack took the opportunity.

"I um...I want to apologize. For how I acted today. For how I've been acting."

Janet turned toward him, waiting for him to continue.

"It's just...lately, it feels like life has been one big shock after another."

Janet smirked. "Really? Gosh, I feel like our lives are so mundane..."

"Aha! You admit it!" he pointed at her in gotcha mode, his eyes playful.

She rolled her own in response, but then she began to laugh. Then they were both laughing. Suddenly everything felt so stupid, so silly. In a good way.

Once the laughter subsided, he continued, "What about you?"

"What about me?"

"Has anything about our lives shocked you?"

She paused, only for a moment, before speaking. "Actually, there is one thing."

"Oh yeah? And what's that?"

"It was when you stopped my wedding to Phillip seven years ago. I had almost believed..." she stopped for a moment, as if lost in thought, then continued. "I'd almost believed it was never going to happen."

He pulled up to a red light, the sound of the blinker indicating the left turn he was planning to take slicing through the silence like a drum. "More than Words" by Extreme played softly on the radio. He was reminded that he was not her Jack, the brave Jack, the Jack who took a stand. She had no idea what a coward the man who sat beside her really was.

"Are you glad I did?" he asked, hesitant, genuinely curious – still working on relinquishing the denial he'd been living in all these years.

She smiled. From her point of view, he was simply making a playful joke. Of course, there could only be one answer.

"I can't imagine my life if you hadn't."