Friends and Lovers

Friends and Lovers

Chapter Seven

It was a quick brush of his mouth, more a crush of lips than a true kiss, yet the world tilted beneath her.

She felt the warmth of his skin against hers and the pressure of his fingers still imprisoning her wrist. His eyes looking in to hers were deep pools of blue so dark they were nearly black in the warm glow of the lamp.

Matt had kissed her…

He'd kissed her… but why? "I Don't hate you" He'd said, but what did that mean? Sora's mind raced through the possibilities. Did she really dare to hope?

Time spun away from her as one heartbeat bled into the next. I'm crazy She thought wildly, lost in the ocean of his gaze, this can't be real. Surely she'd never left her bed and this whole night was a desperate dream.

Oh but if it was did she want it to end? She looked at him, her eyes soaking in every detail lest she wake. The slight tilt of his head and the blond hair tumbling into his eyes, the line of his jaw, his lips… her eyes lingered there.

She could feel the years between them falling away and she was a teenager again. Everything she'd wanted was here, she thought, if she only dared to reach for it. "Matt…" His name escaped in a breathy sigh and hung between them- a name uttered in a dream. Her heart constricted painfully in her chest. Was this real? Could this be real?

The corner of his mouth quirked up in a gentle parody of his familiar smirk.

"What?." He teased and her mouth went dry at the whispered sound. Nervously she wet her lips and her pulse raced when his eyes dropped to follow the dart of her tongue. Did he want to kiss her again? The warmth of his breath sent shivers coursing through her as he lowered his head. She arched to meet him, her lids fluttering closed in anticipation...

But their lips never touched.

She felt the muscles tense beneath her hand and opened her eyes to see him looking over her head to the railing above. She frowned in confusion and then she heard it. The unmistakable sound of a door clicking closed.

"Shhh." Matt put a finger to his lips in unnecessary emphasis and gestured to the second floor, warning her that someone was coming down the stairs . With his hand still gripping her wrist he pulled her away from the pool of light cast by the lamp toward the shadows at the edge of the room and together they slipped into the kitchen like guilty teenagers.

Sora didn't know why they were hiding, but they both held their breath as they listened to the whispered sound of bare feet descending the stairs above them. Matt's hand released her wrist to open a door beside them and without any warning he pushed her inside the cramped space. Startled, she stumbled against a row of cans that shifted and threatened to topple. She raised her hands to steady them and her head brushed the slanted ceiling. The space was so cramped she knew there was no way they could both fit inside. She turned just as Matt closed the door and she watched the rectangle of light disappear, leaving her in a darkness so complete she couldn't even be sure her eyes were still open.

The realization that she'd been shoved into a pantry under the stairs came to her slowly and she had to cover her mouth to keep from giggling.

She took deep breaths to compose herself, conscious of the small space and precarious dry goods perched around her as she shifted the weight from her injured heel. She wondered where Matt was hiding as she heard the slap of footsteps on the hard floors coming closer . Suddenly she could see her toes against the grain of the wood floor, illuminated by the scant light coming in under the door. A startled cry told her the person entering the room had turned on the light to see Matt. "Sorry" she heard his amused voice from the other side of the door, "didn't mean to scare you."

"It's okay, you only gave me a heart attack." she recognized the dry note in Joe's voice and couldn't resist smiling - Oh to have seen his face! The door creaked as Matt leaned his weight against it and she heard his low chuckle.

"Hey, mission accomplished."

"What are you doing down here?" Joe asked.

"I could ask you the same thing." Matt pointed out, Sora didn't need to see to know Joe must have rolled his eyes, because she heard the accompanying sigh.

""You could, but I'm not the one hiding in the dark."

"Well we can't all be children of the night" Matt's flippant response was met with silence. She imagined he was probably smirking as he stared down Joe and she barely dared to breathe.

"I thought I heard Sora," Joe gave in, his tone grudging "I came to see if she was okay."

"Why wouldn't she be okay?" Matt asked, and Sora heard the defensiveness in his question.

"I don't know Matt," Joe replied sarcastically, "why wouldn't she be okay?" Sora cringed, remembering what he said about their friends' blaming him for her absence. No wonder he held so much resentment toward her. The door rustled as Matt shifted position.

"Calm down Romeo," He mocked, "She's a big girl, I'm sure she's fine."

"Is she here?" Joe's own voice was suspicious- accusing. "I heard you talking to someone."

"Nope"

"But I-"

"It was the phone." Matt lied, cutting him off. It was obvious he had no intention of admitting to Joe that he had been with her or revealing where she was hiding. She was confused, but grateful. She loved Joe dearly, but her stomach twisted at the idea of his seeing her like this.

Matt's tone warned against questioning him, but Joe either didn't heed the warning or didn't hear it.

"Mimi?" He asked. That was the second time tonight someone assumed Matt was on the phone with Mimi, Sora realized, and, her interest piqued, she leaned in to the door to better hear his response. But if Matt answered it wasn't with words. There was a pause long enough that she could feel the tension between them even in her hiding space.

"How's that going?" Joe finally asked, breaking the silence.

"It's not," Matt answered.

"Oh… if you want to talk…?" Joe trailed off.

"I don't. Was there something you needed?" Matt asked. Joe's nervous laugh came from further away, and the sound of his shuffling feet suggested he was already backing out of the room.

"I get it man, get some sleep." She listened to the thump of Joe's foot steps on the stairs above her head, but Matt didn't open the pantry right away. They waited in silence until the door to his room closed behind him, making sure Joe was safely settled before determining it was all clear.

Sora had questions, not the least being why Matt had kissed her, why everyone was acting weird about Mimi, or why he'd lied to Joe? She stood in the pantry and squinted at him against the over-bright light of the kitchen.

"You put me in the pantry." She accuse instead, he smiled.

"I did," He agreed. The smile was wide and genuine, and her heart did somersaults in her chest.

These feelings were ridiculous, she knew and acknowledged it to herself. This was nothing but unresolved longing leftover from her teens. They hadn't even spoken in years- it was completely unreasonable to feel this kind of response when they were practically strangers… and yet could it be that he finally felt the same? Did he feel something pulling him to her- like the hand of fate was reaching out to them.

He stood there, smiling softly at her as though she was the only thing he wanted to see. Oh dear, she thought, I'm in trouble. It had been hard enough to resist him when he was being intentionally awful. This smile softened him, making him seem vulnerable. This was the kind of smile a girl could thrive on, like a flower in the sunlight.

She already knew she would see him smiling this smile in her dreams.

"Come on," He said softly, extending his hand to pull her from the pantry. "Lets go to bed."

Sora knew he didn't mean together, but that didn't stop her from blushing furiously. She resisted the urge to duck her head in shame. Even he wouldn't be that direct, she reasoned, and surely he didn't think she would… she wouldn't of course- they were practically strangers after all. She forced the imagery from her head and watched as Matt knelt down and gestured for her to climb on his back.

"I'll carry you upstairs." He explained.

Sora remembered her heel and tentatively shifted her weight to test the pain. She was relieved the sharp sensation was gone now that the glass had been removed. "I can walk." She assured him.

"I'm sure you can,." Matt said, "but Joe is probably listening and the stairs creak." He raised his eyebrows "Unless you want to explain yourself to Prince Charming up there."

"It's not like that!." She nearly shrieked and he laughed as she smacked at his back. He was right though, that conversation with Joe was the last way she wanted to end the night.

"Okay, but why was I hiding in the pantry?" She asked, placing her hands on his bare shoulders. Matt grasped the back of her knees and lifted her easily. Her fingers dug in as she steadied herself, both physically and mentally. His skin was hot as a brand against her bare thighs and she couldn't help the faint trembling of her limbs.

"You're barely dressed" he pointed out as if she'd forgotten, "I thought you might not want anyone else to see you." Sora hadn't even considered her clothing when they'd been interrupted and she cringed, thinking about how she must look. Even so her heart fluttered that he would think of her feelings in such a situation. Just when she was trying to think of them as strangers he reminded her again of the boy she'd been so close to growing up. Smiling, she leaned closer and laid her cheek against his head.

"Thank you," she said quietly, the closeness bringing a new onslaught of sensations to resist. That was a bad idea she thought to herself as Matt ascended the stairs one slow step at a time. A very bad idea.

By the time he reached the second floor she was a quaking mess. She'd said she could walk earlier, but if he put her down now she was sure her knees would wobble and she would sink in to a puddle at his feet. Her bedroom door seemed to take an eternity to reach, and yet they arrived much too soon. At first Matt simply stood there and Sora's heart beat so loud it was like a battering ram pounding at the gates.

What happens now? She wondered.

Matt shifted his hands from behind her knees and slowly she slid from his back. She touched down on the balls of her feet and reluctantly released her grip on his shoulders, leaning against him until she was confident her legs were steady. Matt opened the door quietly and stepped to the side so she could enter.

She was shocked to see her empty bed,blankets tossed back in the moonlight, looking just as it had when she'd slipped from it. Was it such a short time ago? So much had happened in that time it was strange to see it unchanged. Matt had kissed her.

"I don't hate you," he'd said. "Lets go to bed," he'd said.

But what did he mean?

This was uncharted territory for her and her feet felt glued to the floor. What should she do? She wanted to kiss him again - wanted him to kiss her… wanted so many more things she couldn't say, even to herself. But was this the time? It seemed she had been waiting forever for a moment just like this and here she finally stood. Did she want to let this moment slip by, as she had let all the others? But this was so fast… too fast.

Not long ago (her sense of time had escaped her, but she was sure it had not been very long ago at all) she'd tossed and turned in that bed, certain this moment was lost to her forever.

Now here they stood- together. She only needed the courage to reach for what she wanted… but what did she want? "I don't hate you," he'd said, and if he didn't hate her what did he feel? What should she do? The bed stood empty and inviting, taunting her- mocking her turmoil.

Tentatively she stepped into the bedroom and turned to Matt. She had hoped to see his expression and know the answer, but the hallway was too dark. Torn, she simply stood before him and struggled. The problem wasn't that she didn't know what to do. Realistically she knew what she should do. It was so simple, just tell him goodnight. The problem was that she didn't want to do what she should do. She stood in the shaft of moonlight and tried to search the shadows of his face for any hint of how the night should end. She half hoped he would lean in and take the choice away. All he had to do was step forward and there would be no going back.

Please, she thought, unable to breathe. Her hands shook and she clenched them in to fists in a futile attempt to steady them. The seconds passed like minutes before Matt finally leaned in. This was it! Thoughtlessly her eager hands reached out to pull him to her, but he captured them in his before she could touch him.

"Goodnight Sora," He whispered, and his breath warmed her face. He released her hands and pushed her further in to the room. She felt her mouth fall open in disbelief. Watched as his fingers rested on the knob to pull the door closed behind him. He paused as if for a second thought.

"Tomorrow," he said, his tone serious as he faced her, " maybe wear more clothes."

The air hissed through her teeth and she reached out to slam the door in his face, but he pulled it closed just as she hit it. She heard his chuckle on the other side and gave the door a good kick, which promptly reminded her she was not wearing shoes. Damn you Matt! She felt the laughter bubbling up in her as well and hobbled her frustrated self to bed.

She fell in to the blankets and smiled, her body humming with what could only be happiness. She snuggled into the shirt she still wore and breathed deep, smelling him.

She couldn't wait for tomorrow.

8