Chapter 23

Three Weeks Later

Thanksgiving Day

I'm curling my hair in the upstairs bathroom later that morning when the doorbell rings.

"Can somebody get that?" My mother shouts from the kitchen. "It's probably our neighbors." She licks her fingers after testing a dish. "They always drop off a pie or something sweet from the bakery they own down the road."

"I'm on it!" Steven stands up from the couch, clapping loudly as his team scores a touchdown. He winks at Cleveland, prideful. "You owe me twenty bucks."

Taylor just snorts at his comment on the couch.

Cleveland just laughs. "Hey, the game isn't over yet."

The three of them were downstairs watching football in the living room but I was pretty sure Steven was the only one actually watching the game. I could hear Taylor picking Cleveland's brain about all of his travels – his solo backpacking trips through Europe, the time he went to Bali on a whim, and the endless list of places he'd visited for book tours. Steven and Taylor were booking their honeymoon soon so they were eager to get his advice. It was still so mind boggling to me that in just a few months, my best friend and my brother would be married like for real. It was crazy how fast time seemed to move around the holidays. The year was almost over.

"Belly!" My mother calls out next, hovering over the stovetop. "Can you come set the table please?"

"Coming!" I swiftly wrap my hair around the barrel, wincing as I almost burn my hand.

My mom was hosting Thanksgiving this year and to say she was excited was an understatement. Taylor and I had helped her in the kitchen all morning but my mother was too stubborn for her own good. She had done most of the hard work herself. Conrad was still a few hours away but I could tell my mom was eager to have everything ready by the time he got here. This morning, my mom had asked me three separate times how close he was and Steven had joked that she was more excited to see him than she was to see us, her own kids. Honestly? I didn't mind it because I was excited to see him too. And it was nice to see my mom so excited about something. I rarely got to see this side of her.

Originally, Conrad and I had planned to drive down together for Thanksgiving, but his busy schedule hadn't allowed it. Between clinical rotations and residency interviews, Conrad had been working nonstop. I had been working long hours myself too, planning events at the Country Club. This resulted in us not seeing each other for three weeks since his birthday weekend. Three long and painful weeks aside from the occasional Facetime we could squeeze in. So I was just grateful he could make it to Thanksgiving at all. I knew he had to be exhausted but he told me he wouldn't miss it for the world. I had been counting down the days until today. A loud commotion downstairs pulls me out of my thoughts.

"Hey, you're not the neighbor." Steven laughs as he holds the front door open.

"Hey Steve." I hear a familiar voice greet him. "Happy Thanksgiving."

The moment I hear his voice, my heart skips a beat.

"Connie!" I can hear the smile in my mother's voice from the kitchen. "So glad you could make it!"

I almost burn myself again with the curling iron as I rush to finish the last of my curls. I use my free hand to check the time on my phone sitting on the bathroom counter. He was early. Much earlier than he said he'd be and it makes me smile, ear to ear, in the mirror. Leave it to Conrad to surprise me and my family for Thanksgiving.

"Oh Belllyyyyy." My brother sings in a mocking tune at the foot of the stairs. "Your boyfriend's hereee."

I hear Conrad laugh as they greet each other. I turn off my curling iron and I smooth my outfit down in the mirror, feeling a little nervous. I had gotten my hair done and I was curious to see what his reaction would be. I had gotten caramel highlights which were pretty subtle and I had also asked for layers. It wasn't a total transformation or anything. I still looked like me but it was a nice change. Something different. My mother had said it made me look more sophisticated, like a woman who has grown into herself, but I felt like I looked pretty much the same.

I reach the top of the stairs within seconds and I watch my family greet Conrad first in the entryway, admiring him in private at first. I let out a breath as I take him in. I can't help but notice how much can change about a person in three weeks. Conrad's hair was much longer now, falling past his ears, and it's slightly glistening from the snow outside. I had always loved Conrad Fisher with wet hair. He has some stubble on his face too but it looks soft. He brushes a stray lock of hair out of his eyes as he talks to Cleveland – a familiar gesture that sends warmth flooding through me and my gaze catches on his wrist. He was wearing it. The watch I had given him for his birthday. He had told me over the phone he wore it to every residency interview, claiming it was his good luck charm, and it filled me with indescribable joy to see him wearing it today. I was wearing the promise ring he had given me and he was wearing the watch I had given him. The rest of his outfit was unmistakably him. A burgundy colored quarter-zip sweater with khakis. Something a doctor would wear. My mother hugs Conrad last and for the longest. She has strands of her ponytail coming loose, still wearing her kitchen apron, as she says something to him. Something only for him to hear and they smile at each other when she pulls away. I wonder what she had said to him. My mother and Conrad had always had a special relationship. As she talks to him, his eyes casually flicker around the room. He was looking for me and I guess that was my cue. Everyone tells him how happy they are to see him then it was my turn.

I make my way down the stairs, my hand gliding down the banister, feeling a little shy after not seeing him for three weeks. Conrad looks up from my mother and as soon as our eyes meet, it's like we're the only people there. It always felt that way after we would reunite after weeks apart and I hoped that was something that would never change. His eyes roam over me with a tenderness that makes my breath catch and I can feel a blush blooming on my cheeks. Laurel notices his shift in attention, turning around.

I smile, pausing when I reach the last step. "You made it."

Conrad flashes his signature lopsided smile. The same smile that has had my heart since I was ten years old.

"I made it." His eyes never leave mine.

My mother glances between us, a smile tugging at her lips, then she says something we don't hear and everyone fades out of the entryway. I knew they were giving us privacy and it makes me blush harder. I look down, letting out a small laugh, then when I look back up, Conrad steps closer to me. His gaze wraps around me like a warm blanket and his hands find mine first. He brings my left hand up to his lips.

"Happy Thanksgiving." He kisses the promise ring before gently lowering my hand. "You look beautiful by the way."

"You clean up pretty nice yourself." I tilt my head, unable to help how much I'm smiling right now.

His warm and steady hands hold mine, grounding me in a way only he can, and he steps closer almost as if he is studying me. His eyes gloss over me then they land on my hair.

"Something's different." He smirks, narrowing his eyes. "Did you change your hair?"

I had been so focused on him that I had already forgotten about my newly cut and highlighted hair. I was pleased that he had noticed the subtle changes but then again, Conrad Fisher wasn't like other guys. He noticed everything and I loved him for it.

"Um, yeah." The blush on my cheeks return. Good thing I was wearing makeup today. "I got some highlights and layers. I was going to send you a picture but I thought I would just surprise you in person." I pose for him on the step. "What do you think?"

Conrad could say so much with his eyes. His eyes slowly roam over me from head to toe and it makes my heart race. It makes me wish we were alone. I was pretty sure he was thinking the same thing because he just steps closer, biting his lip, hugging me to him.

"I think." He whispers with his lips at my ear. "That I'm going to have a really really hard time keeping my hands to myself this weekend."

"Oh, is that right?" I laugh in his arms as he pulls away to look at me.

"Mhm." He nods, smirking again, then he lifts me off of the step.

He crushes me in a bear hug like he had done my whole life and I squeal in his arms as my hair falls into his face. He makes me feel like a precious doll, the way he effortlessly picks me up and sets me back down on my feet. He kisses me midlaugh as he sets me back down and it's even better than I remembered.

"Your hair looks good too, you know." I compliment him in return, admiring him up close afterwards. "It's getting so long."

Conrad looks almost shy as I tuck a lock of hair behind his ear. Was he blushing?

"I meant to get a haircut before I left." He laughs under my touch. "But I never got around to it-"

"No, I love it." I tilt my head, playing with it. "I've always loved your hair at this length. It reminds me of that summer." I smile, dropping my hand. "The first summer you kissed me."

Conrad just smiles as he pulls me closer, pressing us together until we're hugging.

"I'll have to keep that in mind." His lips chase mine.

"You better." I smile as he kisses me.

It always amazed me how Conrad and I could go weeks apart then just pick up right where we'd left off like he had never really left at all. We weren't typically the couple who showed lots of PDA with family around but after three weeks apart, it was hard to not be affectionate. We simply couldn't keep our hands off of each other and I wouldn't have it any other way. He pulls away first like I knew he would but I wasn't done with him yet. I had missed him so much. I buy us a few more minutes alone.

"Here." I say, looking over my shoulder at my family who is distracted and talking in the kitchen. "Let's go put your bag upstairs real quick."

Conrad smirks, immediately understanding, then he slides his duffle bag back onto his shoulder. "After you."

We both knew we weren't going upstairs to just put his bag away.

As soon as I shut my bedroom door, we're kissing. Conrad lets his duffle bag fall from his shoulder without breaking our kiss, all of his attention and focus on me. He cups my face in his hands and the kiss is so good it takes my literal breath away. The kiss starts slow and passionate then the built-up tension after three weeks apart catches up with us, leaving us both gasping for air. I have to remind myself that my family is downstairs but our tension doesn't seem to care. It's hot and heavy and needy. I had a feeling the tension would be there all day too until we finally had a true moment alone. Our lips finally break apart to catch our breaths and I find my lip gloss is smeared all over his lips and his hair is sticking up in the back. I put a hand up to my face, stifling a giggle.

"What's so funny?" He teases me, his eyes soft and glazed from all of our kissing.

I turn to show him his reflection in my childhood bedroom mirror and we both laugh at the sight. He flattens his hair with a quick swipe, then his hands wrap around my waist, pulling me into him. He hugs me from behind as we face the mirror and his chin gently rests on my shoulder. It takes me back to his birthday weekend, to the way he held me just like this, looking at our reflection saying we were immovable objects. The day he had given me the promise ring. I smile at the ring on my finger in the mirror as I hold onto him. I never wanted to leave these arms.

"You know." Conrad says with a smirk playing on his lips, his eyes on me. "I'm really digging the new hair."

"Really?" My eyes light up.

"Really." He holds me tighter. "I don't know how you manage to make everything look like it was made for you but you do." He kisses my cheek.

"Oh, please." I laugh at his cheesiness.

"I'm serious." He laughs. "I swear, every time I see you, it's like when you would get out of the car every summer and everything would just hit me all over again. How do you do it?" He shakes his head, letting out a breath. "How do you get more and more beautiful everytime I see you?"

"Okay." I giggle in his arms, blushing bashfully. "What do you want?"

"You." He keeps his chin on my shoulder, making direct eye contact in the mirror. "Do we have a deal?"

I laugh. "Yes, we have a deal."

"Good." He laughs with me then he sighs when he sees the time on his watch, wrapped around me. "We should probably go back down."

"Yeah." I sigh, holding onto his arms. "We probably should."

Naturally, we end up doing the opposite. He starts to kiss my neck playfully and I giggle in his arms as his lips tickles me. I can feel the smile on his lips as he plants each and every kiss, listening to me laugh. He trails his kisses up to my ear and I turn my head so that we're kissing. I melt into his arms, letting my head fall back, as he kisses me. His kisses are softer now but there is something about each one that feels so charged. So magnetic. I really wished we were alone right now.

"Okay." Conrad pulls away first. He keeps his eyes closed for a second, fighting himself, before he opens them to look at me. "We really should-"

"Wait." My fingers grip the back of his hair, bringing his face back to mine. "Just one more."

There was something about the way Conrad was kissing me today that felt different. I couldn't quite put my finger on it. It was like he was more confident in himself, in us. His kisses were slow and soft but they weren't innocent. He starts to use tongue and I moan into his mouth, taking a step back to press myself against him. He looks down at me and I look at him, both of us playing with fire, but before I can make another move he reminds me of who is downstairs.

"We should go." He whispers, breathless. His eyes stay on my lips. "Your family is waiting on us."

"Yeah." I whisper with my eyes on his lips.

The next thing I know we're colliding into each other again. I can feel how much he had missed me with every passing kiss. He isn't kissing me slow and soft anymore. His lips are chasing after mine and I can't keep up. It reminds me of our first time, how he had kissed me when I had told him to not stop. His kisses were heavy with angst and longing. The kind that makes you gasp in between. The kind that makes me want to do a lot of things. I turn around to face him in his arms and he backs me up against my dresser, leaving me the breathless one this time. He kisses my neck then he comes back to kiss me and his lips catch my bottom lip in his. He tugs at it before he pulls away.

"Okay." He forces himself to take a step back and he laughs. "If we don't go down now, we never will."

I pout, giving him the puppy dog eyes, leaning against the dresser. "Do we have to?"

Conrad just laughs at my expression as he steps closer.

"Yes, but tell you what." He smirks, squeezing my hands. "How about we go on a little date later? Just you and me? We'll sneak away."

I let out a small sigh and I finally give in, accepting his deal.

"Okay." I nod, squeezing his hands back. "Let's go."

I begin to step away from him but Conrad doesn't let go. He pulls me back towards him and we are facing the mirror again. He snakes his arms around my waist and he hugs me from behind, even closer this time. He rests his chin on the top of my head and he just holds me without saying a word. The way he was looking at us, our reflection in the mirror, it was like he was savoring this moment in his head. Like he was holding onto something precious, a special moment that I didn't want to interrupt, so I let him have it. I let us share this still moment as I close my eyes. When I open my eyes again, he is looking at me in the mirror with so much love in his eyes it makes my head spin.

"Happy Thanksgiving, Belly." Conrad says softly to me. "I'm really glad we're spending it together this year."

I smile at our reflection, feeling the exact same way.

"Me too." I smile as he presses a warm kiss to my cheek. I close my eyes again, holding onto his arms, wishing we could stay in this little moment forever. "Me too, Conrad."

Then I turn my head to steal one last kiss from him. "Happy Thanksgiving."

Conrad:

I used to hate the holidays.

Okay, not really. I mean, who could really hate the holidays? Maybe dread is a better word.

I used to dread the holidays because after my mom died, they never quite felt the same. If anything, they were just another painful reminder of everything Jeremiah and I had lost. Another reminder that things would never be the same. We would never get to have another Thanksgiving with our mom. We would never get to wear those God awful matching Christmas sweaters or pajamas she would hide in our stockings every year without fail. We would never get to wake up to a house that smelled like Christmas with presents scattered underneath a tree. We'd never get to bake cookies with her while she made us watch her favorite cheesy holiday movies on repeat. Some years she would make Jere and I drop off the cookies to neighbors to "spread holiday cheer". Some years she would have us go with her to volunteer at a soup kitchen to give back. It was funny. Jere and I used to complain about all of those traditions growing up. We used to say anything just to get out of them. And now, we would do anything just to relive them. We would give anything just to have those traditions back, just to have our mom back. Adam didn't care to keep up those traditions. The holidays just weren't the same after you lose someone you love. The magic of the season was gone just like our angel of a mom. At least that's what I used to think but then there was Belly.

Belly setting the table just like how my mom would with woven placemats, miniature pumpkins, and taper candles. Belly helping Laurel in the kitchen, her new hair swaying back and forth. Belly surprising everyone with not just one but two pies from Rosie's, our favorite pie stand in Cousins, for Thanksgiving. Belly wearing my mom's ring on her finger today loud and proud. Belly's laughter and smile lighting up the room. If there was any magic left in this world, it was Isabel Conklin. She shined brighter than any star in the sky or any Christmas light on a tree. And today out of all days, I just felt so lucky and so thankful to call her mine. My heart that had once felt so frozen and grinchlike towards the holidays was slowly defrosting and it was all because of her. She just made me feel like a kid again and I hadn't felt that holiday magic in a very long time.

I catch up with Steven and Cleveland in the living room, watching the game, but I can't seem to keep my eyes on the screen. My gaze just keeps drifting back to her. Belly's new hair was really doing something to me. I had never seen her with highlights before. Sometimes her hair would turn a lighter shade of brown during the summers but it was nothing like this. Her long dark chocolate locks now had hints of caramel highlights woven throughout them. It was my new favorite shade of brown. I just wanted to run my fingers through it. It was like a messy blowout look with the layers and pieces framing her face. I was so into it. She catches me staring at her from across the room and she smiles at me. It sends electric jolts through me and I can't help but return the smile.

I had a lot to be thankful for this year but Isabel Conklin was undoubtedly at the very top of my list.

She would always be.

God, I just couldn't wait to put a real diamond ring on that pretty little finger.

"Dinner is served!" My mother announces in one breath as she sets down the last dish. The turkey.

Everyone finds their seats around the dining table, scooting their chairs in, taking in the sights and smells.

"Now this." Cleveland grins. "This is the best Thanksgiving spread I have ever seen."

"Careful." Steven jokes, scooting his chair in. "That will go straight to her head."

"Oh please." My mother rolls her eyes. "The only thing going straight to my head after cooking all day is a fat glass of wine."

Everyone laughs but Cleveland wasn't wrong. My mom had truly outdone herself this year. When my mom tried, she was an excellent host and cook. She had even made a few recipes from Susannah's cookbook this year. I recognized a few from the first and last Thanksgiving we had ever spent with the Fishers. That, and the fact that I had seen Susannah's cookbook on the counter when Taylor and I had helped her around the kitchen. I wondered if Conrad had stopped by recently to give it to her. He was the one who had held onto it. It was sweet of him to make a long drive just to do that. He hadn't said a word to me about it and the thought of it warms my heart.

"Oh, speaking of wine! I almost forgot the best part!" My mother shoots back up out of her seat and walks back into the kitchen, untying her apron.

Cleveland just laughs, his eyes following her. "You sure you don't need any help in there?"

We hear her rummage through a drawer then she comes back with a bottle of wine and a corkscrew. She hands them to Cleveland as she finally sits down after spending all morning on her feet.

"Nope." She scoots her chair in, sighing. "The only thing I need from you is to crack this bad boy open."

"Ask and you shall receive." Cleveland grins. He opens the wine for her and he pours the wine into her glass first. She smiles at him appreciatively.

"The cook should always eat first." Cleveland winks at her as he tops off her glass.

I smile at them. It was sweet to see how much of their relationship had grown since moving in together this past summer. It was nice to see someone take care of my mom for a change. I was just happy that she had found someone who understood her. Someone who understood that she was fully capable of doing things herself but who wanted to take care of her anyways. Cleveland was good for her. Steven and I exchange a look from across the table and I could tell he was thinking the same thing.

Before we dig in, I read Susannah's favorite Thanksgiving Poem out loud then I make everyone say one thing they're grateful for. It was a tradition Susannah had started that I wanted to keep going. A tradition I hoped to continue with my own family someday. Everyone goes around the table to say their piece. Steven and Taylor say their engagement of course. Cleveland says moving in with my mom which was sweet. My mother says the same thing and adds how nice it is to have all of her kids in one place at the same time. Conrad jokes that he is happy to be almost done with medical school then he says he is just thankful to be spending Thanksgiving with people who feel like family. He had told me over the phone a week ago that it had been awhile since he had a true Thanksgiving since Susannah had passed and I knew he meant every word. He thanks my mom again for inviting him and my mother smiles, winking at him. Didn't he know that he would always be invited? He was part of the family.

"What about you, Bean?" My mother eyes me very last. "What are you thankful for this year?"

As I glance at everyone gathered around the table, my heart could burst from all of the love in this room. There was so much good that had come out of this year. So much to be thankful for. My mom and Cleveland's rekindled romance. He had his arm draped over her chair, smiling at her. Steven and Taylor's engagement. He whispers something into her ear that makes her laugh with her hand in his, the sparkle of her engagement ring catching the light. And yet the best part of all was whose hand was in mine because I was in love too. I look at Conrad last, who's sitting on my left and he peers at me with those ocean eyes. His thumb traces mine as we hold hands on the table.

"I'm thankful for family. For all of you." I nod at everyone then I only look at Conrad when I whisper. "And for the magic of new beginnings." I smile at him.

Conrad smiles back at me, squeezing my hand. Laurel watches the two of them with a knowing smile on her face.

"Well said, Bean." Laurel agrees then she winks. "Now let's eat."

There was truly nothing better than this.

Spending the holidays with your favorite people.

Laughter fills the room as the sound of forks clink against my mother's porcelain dishes. She only pulled out these plates for special occasions and today truly did feel more special than prior Thanksgivings. We pass around the dishes of the main course, complimenting my mother on her cooking, while catching up on each other's lives. My mom gets tipsy off of the wine only an hour in which I guess was her right after preparing this entire spread. She cracks jokes thinking she is funny even though her jokes are pretty bad. Steven and I tease her about them but she just rolls her eyes, swirling her glass. Cleveland and my mom start to talk about a few book conferences coming up next year which makes the rest of us tune out. Steven and Taylor catch us up on the latest in wedding planning. They were talking about doing a joint bachelor and bachelorette party in Cousins which actually sounded fun because Jere, Conrad, and I could plan it together. I start to wonder where Jere was today. Conrad hadn't mentioned anything about him and I knew my mother had invited him but I quickly let the thought go. I'm sure he had a good reason to not be here. I tune back in to the conversation as Steven roasts Taylor about the wedding cake flavors they had been testing out. As much as he gives her a hard time, I could tell my brother secretly loved every second of wedding planning with Taylor. For some people, they would find it stressful but not them. They were knocking out their to-do list with ease and having fun along the way. They complimented each other well, balanced each other out. I wondered if people ever thought that way about me and Conrad?

Conrad holds my hand on the table for most of dinner and it feels nice to be so out in the open. To not have to hide or shy away or hold back. To just be. We exchange smiles and side glances all throughout dinner, the tension from earlier still lingering in the air between us. Sometimes he would place his hand on my leg below the tablecloth which would make me blush. Sometimes he would rest his arm on the back of my chair as he talked to my family. Sometimes he would squeeze my hand to get my attention and just smile at me or kiss the promise ring. And each time he did those things, it felt like he was marking me as his all over again. Because I was his and he was mine. There was no hiding it. How happy we were together. How much we had missed each other. My family asks him how residency interviews are going and I feel this new surge of love for him as I watch him answer their questions. There was truly nobody else I'd rather be here with. Nobody else I'd rather be sitting next to today. It was that simple. I would love Conrad Fisher through every season, every holiday, every day for the rest of my life and I could not be more proud to call him mine. He catches me looking at him and he just squeezes my leg, giving me a small wink, sending electric jolts straight through me.

When it's time for dessert, my mom and I serve everyone a slice of pie from Rosie's. I figured everyone would appreciate a taste of Cousin's when it's snowing outside. A slice of summer magic. Steven tells Cleveland the story about the time Susannah had busted the boys for sneaking out to a party on the boardwalk as we eat our pies. They had lied and told the moms they were going to the arcade instead. Keep in mind they had all been under sixteen at the time, totally underage, and they had bummed a ride off a complete stranger. Turns out Jeremiah had been the mastermind behind it all.

"And that's why Susannah banned us from going to the boardwalk for awhile." Steven laughs. "We should have listened to Conrad. There was a reason Susannah always put him in charge."

"I don't know about that." Conrad just laughs.

"I'm not surprised." Taylor snorts. "Jeremy always was the party animal out of you three."

"Coming from the party animal herself." Steven nudges her.

Taylor shoves him back playfully and he just kisses her ring again.

"Speaking of Jeremiah." My mother sets down her wine glass and she turns her attention to Conrad. "I invited him this year but I never heard anything back. Is he spending today with Adam?"

Everyone looks at Conrad and suddenly the energy in the room shifts. His eyes flicker to Steven so quick I could have imagined it. He opens his mouth to say something but Steven beats him to it like he was trying to save him or something. I quickly get the feeling that the two of them know something that I don't.

"He's out of town for a business trip." Steven nods, nonchalantly. "He sends his regards."

"Business trip my ass." Taylor laughs, rolling her eyes. "He's with his new girlfriend and her family. He's been practically posting about it on his story all day."

That's right. Conrad had told me during the Halloween weekend that Jere started seeing someone. I had already forgotten about it. Out of sight, out of mind. The look on Conrad's face made sense now. He was trying to be careful with what he said about Jere and I wasn't sure if that was for my sake or for my mother's sake but didn't he know it was all in the past now?

"Oh." My mother nods without looking in my direction once. "I didn't realize they were that serious."

"They're not." Steven shrugs. "They just started dating like a month ago."

"Well, it's serious enough to meet her family." Taylor says what everyone else is thinking.

Steven mutters something under his breath to Taylor, quickly looking in my direction. The room falls awkwardly silent and it feels like everyone is walking on eggshells around me. I put an end to it.

"Good for them." I speak up and everyone's eyes fall on me. "I mean it's better than spending the holidays alone with Adam after what he tried to pull this summer." I shrug. "I'm glad he has somewhere to go. No one should have to be alone for the holidays."

Everyone nods in awkward silence.

"Yeah, well." Steven puts his arm around Taylor's chair, smiling at my mom. "He's really missing out this year. This has been a great Thanksgiving. Thank you, mom."

My mother smiles at all of us, the tension in the room settling. "Thank you all for coming."

Cleveland redirects the conversation back to wedding planning and everyone starts to talk about that instead. Cleveland was good at that.

Conrad squeezes my hand to get my attention as everyone talks and I look back at him. He doesn't say anything but I can tell he was checking on me. His eyes ask mine if I was okay but didn't he know that this conversation had no effect on me? It didn't hurt anymore to hear that Jere had moved on because we both had. I had moved on too. Jeremiah was nothing but a small piece of my past that would remain just that. My past. And I had made peace with that. But Conrad? He was everything and more. He was my past, my present, and my future all wrapped into one. I smile and I squeeze his hand back on the table to reassure him. I was fine. I really was. I was doing more than fine because his hand was the one that was in mine and that was all I had ever wanted. All I had ever dreamt about.

Conrad brings my hand up to his lips and he kisses the promise ring again. I blush as he does it. I would never get tired of him doing that.

Taylor catches them in the act from across the table and she smiles at them without them knowing.

It was safe to say Taylor Jewel was no longer Team Jellyfish. She hadn't been for awhile, not since the day Belly broke down to her and Anika after calling off the wedding, telling them everything she had left out before about Jeremiah.

Conrad had been texting Taylor about Belly a lot recently. He would ask her thoughts on ideas for the proposal, send her updates about the ring, send her pictures from Pinterest which made Taylor laugh at the thought of him even scrolling on the app. It had been an unexpected friendship that had come out of nowhere, but Taylor liked feeling needed. She liked how Conrad was approaching this. He was taking it more seriously than Jeremy ever had. Taylor had never seen this side of Conrad before and there was one thing she knew for sure. This was the real deal. I guess she wouldn't be the only one breaking the pact. Her and Belly would both be marrying their first loves.

Conrad:

"So while I have all of you here." Laurel changes the subject. "What are all of your plans for Christmas?"

"Nothing yet." Steven shrugs with Taylor. "Just working until the holidays."

"Same." Belly answers for us.

"Well, we were thinking." Laurel smiles. "And rather than doing presents this year, what if we did another trip as a family? One last hurrah before the wedding and before Conrad's medical school graduation."

"Alright, keep talking, mom." Steven grins. "We're listening."

Everyone laughs.

"Cleveland and I have a writers retreat around Christmas but we were thinking about inviting all of you to come with us." Laurel nods. "It would just be for a few days."

"I have a good friend who owns a ski lodge up in the mountains, close to where the retreat will be." Cleveland adds, leaning forward. "He's giving us a killer deal to stay in one of the cabins. I'm sure I could work something out and get two more reserved. All you would need is money for food, travel, and activities. We'd take care of the rest." He grins at Laurel then back at us. "All you would have to do is show up."

"Skiing? Oh fuck yeah." Steven replies almost immediately. He had been a big skier in high school. "Taylor and I have some leftover PTO for the year so I'm sure we could make something work."

"Yeah, I'd love to." Taylor replies. "I've actually never gone skiing before."

"I think I could make it work too." Belly chimes in. "I would just need the dates asap to request them off."

"And Connie." Laurel looks at me and I look at her. "I know you're pretty tied up with things on your end but if there is any way you could make it, we'd love to have you."

"Think of it as a late birthday gift slash Christmas present, from us to you." Cleveland winks.

"Thank you guys." I smile. "I'd love to. I'll see what I can do."

I could feel Belly's eyes on me and I meet her gaze. She is smiling at me, her eyes full of excitement, and I smile back at her. I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to make it considering how busy things were but I would certainly try. A holiday getaway with my girl sounded like the perfect way to spend our first Christmas together in years.

"Oh, and Jeremiah is welcome to come too of course." Laurel adds. "If he can make it."

"I'll let him know." I nod.

Steven and I exchange a quick look. We both knew that was highly unlikely considering his questionable choices lately.

"Well, hey, I'm totally down." Steven leans back in his chair, folding his arms. "And I'm a pretty damn good skier so everyone watch out."

Taylor laughs. "You do know that not everything is a competition, right?"

"In this family, it is." Belly jokes and everyone laughs.

"Great, well, we're still working out the dates and details. We'll let you know by the end of this week before everything is booked for the holidays." Laurel concludes. "Oh, and if you do come. Pack warm. This isn't Cousins. We might get snowed in for a day or two so be prepared for anything." She raises a brow in Steven's direction. "I'm looking at you, Steven. No flip flops on or off the ski lift."

Belly and Taylor look at each other, bursting into laughter, over an old memory.

"Mom! That was one time!" Steven throws his hands up, feeling attacked, and everyone just laughs.

It turns into another storytime about how Steven got a little too drunk during senior ditch day in high school. Laurel had grounded him the moment he got home from the ski trip and I remembered Belly relaying the story to me over the phone later that night. It was when we had dated the first time around. I smirk as Belly and Taylor give Steven shit about it. It was crazy to think about that time in our lives. A time where my mom was still alive. So much had changed since then, not only for all of us, but for Belly and I. How far we'd come as a couple. Belly had more than an infinity necklace now. She had a promise ring sitting pretty on her ring finger. And soon enough, there would be a real diamond to replace it.

I squeeze her hand on the table as I have these thoughts and she smiles at me, completely unaware of the plans I have in store for us.

After dinner, everyone moves to the living room to play some games.

I stay back to help my mom clear the table. I figured the least I could do, after my mom had cooked all day, was to take care of the dishes. I guess I was just used to it by now after working at the Country Club restaurant this past summer. We drop the dishes off one by one into the sink then she rolls up her sleeves to start washing them. I immediately step in to stop her.

"Mom, take a break." I laugh. "You've been on your feet all day. I got this."

She looks like she is about to argue with me then she just smiles, accepting my help for once. "Thanks, Bean."

She walks back out of the kitchen to collect the rest of the wine glasses and I take off my ring. I carefully set it to the side, not wanting to get water on it and I do it without even thinking about it. I roll up my sleeves then I turn on the faucet to start on the dishes. In the living room, I can hear them start to play a card game and I listen to them play. I rinse off the plates and silverware, zoning out, thinking about nothing in particular really. My mother returns with the rest of the wine glasses and she sets them down into the sink. Her eyes immediately find the ring sitting on the counter. Just like Conrad, Laurel didn't miss a thing.

"That's a pretty ring." My mother says with a knowing smile on her face.

I almost drop the plate I'm rinsing off when she says it.

Oops.

I hadn't told my mom about the promise ring yet. Matter of a fact, the only person who knew about the promise ring was Taylor, who had nearly screamed into my ear the day I told her over the phone. I'm sure my brother had been around and knew about it too. They were a packaged deal. It hadn't even been a thought in my head that my mom would see it when I put the ring on this morning. It was just a part of me now. Something I wore every single day without fail. I rarely ever took it off. It made me feel close to her. Susannah. And when I was missing Conrad, I guess it made me feel close to him too.

"Thanks." I continue to rinse off the plate, not looking at her. "Conrad gave it to me."

I knew my mother knew it was one of Susannah's rings. She didn't have to say anything. I just knew. She would recognize Susannah's jewelry from anywhere.

"I take it that things are going well between you two if he's giving you one of Beck's rings." She muses, not looking at me either, as she starts to dry off the dishes with a washcloth.

"Yeah." I nod, smiling to myself. "We're really happy, mom."

I hear laughter come from the living room and I look up to find Steven accusing Taylor of cheating. Steven looks at Conrad skeptically and Conrad just shrugs, telling him he doesn't know what he is talking about. Taylor and Conrad exchange a secret look when Steven isn't looking and I can tell Conrad had been helping her win. He could easily see Steven's cards from where he was sitting. It was nice to see Taylor and Conrad on the same team for once. He says something that makes all three of them laugh and I smile, admiring him from afar the way I had done my whole life.

"I can see that." My mother says, catching me in the act, pulling me back to our conversation.

I look back at her then I look back down at the ring. I knew it was time to tell her. There was no hiding when it came to your mother and it wasn't like I was trying to hide it. I had worn it all day in front of them. And I wanted to tell her. I wanted to confide in my mother about everything. It's just the last time I had talked to her about a ring or weddings or anything for that matter, we ended up not speaking for months. We ended up in one of the worst fights we'd ever had and I guess I was afraid of repeating history. I was afraid of how much I seeked her validation and approval.

"It's- it's actually a promise ring." I eventually blurt out. "Conrad gave it to me during his birthday weekend."

I don't look at her at first when I say it. I just continue to rinse off the dishes then when I do sneak a peak, my mother's face surprises me. She doesn't look the least bit shocked or upset by the news at all.

"I was wondering when you were finally going to tell me." She looks amused as she dries off the dishes.

She looks up at me and I blink, frozen. "You already knew?"

She smirks. She was having fun with this. "Good news travels fast."

There was only one person who could have told her. Conrad. I knew Taylor and Steven wouldn't out me. It had to have been Conrad. I knew they talked on the phone sometimes. I just didn't know how often or how much. It makes me wonder what else he had told her. What else did they talk about on the phone? I decide to test the waters.

I keep my voice low, a smile forming on my lips, as I look at him from across the room. "What else has he told you?"

The dishes were all clean now but I keep the water running to mute our conversation.

"Well." Laurel muses. "I know that you two are moving in together after he graduates in May."

"Oh." I blush, feeling like a little kid who just got busted even though I was well into my twenties. My cheeks turn red. "I-I was planning on telling you about that too, mom." I laugh nervously.

She just laughs as she reaches over to turn off the faucet. "I think they're clean now, Bean."

We start to dry off the last of the wine glasses together and it's a moment before either of us say anything. I keep waiting for one of her famous lectures but it never comes. I break the silence first.

"So." I keep my eyes down. "You're not going to tell me that you think we're rushing into things?"

I hated how my voice revealed just how much I cared about her opinion and approval. Not getting it the first time around had me in knots. I wasn't sure I could survive something like that again. She takes a second to think about her words before she says anything.

"In the end, only you can answer that, Bean." She shrugs. "But as your mother, I know you and I can tell you what I see." Her eyes flicker from Conrad then back to me. "And what I see are two people who share something very special. I've never seen you this happy. With anyone." She pauses. "I see the way you two look at each other. You're different with him, Bean, and I think you're both adults who can make your own decisions now."

Her words surprise me. They seem to lift a lot of the anxieties I had going into this conversation.

"Thanks, mom." I nod. "That means a lot."

"It's the truth." She nods back. "If it was anyone else, I'd tell you to slow down but this is Conrad and I know what his intentions are. They're pure." She smiles at me. "And if I can give you any piece of advice, it would be to just trust in what you two have, Bean. Trust in yourself and don't be afraid to trust in him. Just keep building your relationship and growing together. You have the rest of your lives to worry about the rest."

"You're doing it again." I laugh lightly. "You're talking like a writer, mom."

She laughs and it's a nice sound. It was nice to see my mom so relaxed and at ease. It was one of the best conversations we'd had in a long time. I had missed my mom.

"Yeah, well. Try dating one." She muses, watching Cleveland from afar. "He does relationship check-ins with me every week." She says, sarcastically. "I've never had that before."

I laugh with her then I look at how she is looking at Cleveland. It was similar to how I had just been looking at Conrad.

"You know, you should take your own advice sometimes." I tease her back. "Steven and I see how happy Cleveland makes you, mom. We really like him. He's good for you."

"And Conrad's good for you, Bean." She eyes me back. "I see the way he challenges you. The way he looks out for you. The way he leads you. Take it from your own mother who has years of experience with this sort of thing." She looks at me. "It doesn't get any better than him, Bean. You can search the whole world a thousand times over and you'll never find another Conrad. There isn't a thing he wouldn't do for you." She faces me, brushing my hair past my shoulders. "He loves you, you know."

The last five words sting because the last person who had said them to me had been Susannah during our very last conversation. I look down at the ring on the table, thinking about that day. It was almost peculiar how much this conversation seemed to mirror that one in a lot of ways.

"I know." I whisper, keeping my eyes on the ring. "I know he does. And I love him too."

"I hope you know you can always come to me about anything, Bean." My mother says and I look back at her. "I'm your mother and I will always be here for you. I will always be here to listen. This won't be a repeat of the past if that's why you didn't tell me at first." Her eyes hold mine. "This is different. You and I both know that. This is completely different." She smiles. "Because this is Conrad."

Her words bring me great relief. They wash over me and I didn't realize until now just how much I needed to hear them.

"Thank you, mommy." I return a small smile. "I-I think I really needed to hear that." Then I look away, starting to feel a tinge of guilt. "I'm sorry that I didn't tell you sooner. I wanted to, I just-"

"You're telling me now." She stops me then she cups my cheek, holding my face the same way she had as a kid. "Just follow your heart this time, hmm?" She smiles. "It'll know what to do."

I nod as she holds my gaze then she drops her hand from my cheek. She picks up the ring off the counter and she admires it for a second, smiling at it. Then she places it in my palm and she clasps her hand over mine, holding it in place. I look down at our hands then back up at her.

"You're my only daughter." Her voice and eyes are tender as she looks at me and it stirs up emotions inside of me. "And all I've ever wanted is the very best for you. I'm not a perfect mom but I sure do have a perfect daughter. I'm not sure where you came from." She jokes and it brings tears to my eyes. "You've been through a lot, Bean, and you deserve to be loved the right way without having to ask for it." She smiles at me softly. "And you have someone right in front of you who has proven time and time again he is more than willing to do that." She pauses. "So, don't overthink it. Don't doubt him. Don't doubt yourself. Trust in what you two have and let Conrad take the lead for once." She squeezes my hand before letting it go. Every word seems to carry a deeper meaning, as if I'm meant to understand.

She cups my cheek the way a mother does before she says, "Just let him love you, Bean."

Before I can ask her what she means by all of that, Taylor walks into the kitchen and the moment is gone.

Conrad:

We play a few rounds of card games and board games after dinner.

Cleveland and Laurel kick our asses at cards which takes everyone by surprise. You can't outsmart a couple of writers I guess. They had a few years of experience and wisdom on us. We move on to board games and that's where Belly and I dominate. We end up winning almost every single round. What can I say? We played to win. She high-fives me and I just kiss her palm, making her blush in front of everyone.

"Alright, I'm wiped." Laurel sighs, leaning back into the couch. "I think I'm going to settle in for a movie." She smiles at Cleveland next to her. "Care to join me?"

"Sure thing." He grins.

Lauren turns back to us. "Any special movie requests?"

"Actually." Steven smiles at Taylor. "I promised Tay I'd take her out to see some Christmas lights tonight." Then he glances over at us. "You two are welcome to come if you want? We'll drive."

I look beside me to find a pair of wide doe eyes, begging me to say yes. Belly looks so much like younger Belly at that moment and it melts me. She used to get the same look on her face when I would let her tag along after me and the boys. Although I am exhausted myself, sleep could wait. I just couldn't say no to that face. I hadn't been able to say no that face since I was like twelve years old. Besides, I wanted to make the most out of the time that we had together this weekend.

I smirk, nodding towards the door. "Go get your coat."

Belly's face lights up and she stands up within seconds, pulling me up with her. Everyone laughs at her reaction. Leave it to Belly to be absolutely adorable.

Steven drives and Taylor guides us, using a Christmas light neighborhood map on her phone. It occurs to me that we hadn't really gone on an official double date with them yet. Steven and I had always joked about it, taking our girls out together, and here we were finally doing it. We exchange smiles in the rearview mirror when we get into the car. We could get used to this. Belly and I hold hands in the backseat with our legs touching to stay warm. It was still snowing outside. Steven and Taylor bicker over which neighborhoods to check out first. Apparently, a few of the richer neighborhoods had lights that synchronized to Christmas music playing on radio stations. Some of the houses even had a theme, like Candy Land or Barbie or Star Wars Christmas. Belly and I just laugh as we listen to them bicker back and forth. It was their thing. Steven catches us laughing in the backseat and he asks us "What's so funny back there?" in the rearview mirror which of course only makes us laugh harder.

My favorite part of the entire date hands down was watching Belly's reaction to every house.

It somehow managed to get cuter every single time. It reminds me of the Christmas we had snuck off to Cousins together, driving through the main street and admiring all of the twinkling lights. I would never forget that night. How it felt to have her hand in mine, driving through Cousins during Christmas time, stealing side glances at each other as I drove us to the beach house. How it felt to hold her soft, delicate body in my arms later that night, giving ourselves to each other for the first time. It had been pure magic and here we were all these years later, finding the magic again. It had never left. Belly's face lights up at every house, just like it had done that cold December night, and she looks back at me with pure joy to make sure I was looking too. She squeezes my arm a few times, pointing at the way the lights would synchronize to the music. Belly really was such a kid at heart but in the best way possible. She just had this childlike wonder that was infectious. It brought out your own inner child and I had always adored that about her. I think that's part of why I hated the thought of her growing up and doing the Debutante Ball at first. I didn't want the little girl I had known my whole life to grow up. I didn't want the world to dim her light. I didn't want the world to take away that childlike wonder and joy. I wanted her to stay the same girl I had grown up with. The one full of light and life. The one that loved musicals, stuffed polar bears, and running around with messy hair. The world needed more people like Belly. But as we got older, I realized that light could never fade. It was just part of who she was and that was something that would never ever change. Just like my infinite love for her.

Something inside of my chest tightens each time she squeezes my arm or smiles at me as the night goes on. A mix of love and longing. The kind that made my heart beat a little faster. The kind that made me wish time would move faster so I graduate, marry her, and get us our own place so she could decorate it exactly how she wanted. I guess decorating the beach house next year would be a great place to start. I smile as I picture it, the two of us living together in Cousins next year, getting ready for the holidays. Belly and I putting up our very own tree, listening to Christmas classics, with steaming mugs of hot cocoa. Me on a ladder setting up Christmas lights with Belly placing a wreath on the door. Belly and I watching Christmas movies by the fireplace. I could see it all with her and the feeling in my chest just kept getting stronger and stronger throughout the night.

I just wanted to give her everything and one day I would. I really would.

We pull up to the best house of the night. It was decorated just like a real gingerbread house and it lived up to its name. Its walls are a warm, golden brown and every edge is outlined with freshly fallen snow that looks like powdered sugar. The roof is covered with gumdrops and red-green mints forming a vibrant mosaic while miniature candy canes arch over the peaks. Icicles hang from the roof's edge, catching the light as if they're crystals frozen in place. The windows, framed with snow, are lined with tiny dots of sprinkles, giving the impression of frosty panes. At the front door, a lollipop wreath is centered, vibrant and sweet, welcoming all who come near. In the yard, there is a tiny candy cane fence which curves like a little storybook yard. Small peppermint buttons line the edges of the house and there's even a little snowman, made of marshmallows, to greet visitors. Christmas lights twinkle on every crevice and corner.

"Wait, I used to love this one as a kid!" Taylor grabs Steven's arm. "We should stop to take a picture!"

"Taylor, it's snowing outside." Belly laughs, shivering next to me and I point the vents of the heater in the back more towards her. "We'll freeze our asses off."

"You'll live!" Taylor laughs then she looks at Steven with puppy dog eyes. "Pretty please?!"

Steven is already pulling over without a second thought and Taylor just claps, giggling.

"Oh my god!" Taylor turns around to look at Belly. "We have to take a group picture to remember our first official double date!" She opens her car door as soon as we are parked and hops out.

"Okay!" Belly seems more excited now as she hops out too.

Taylor props her phone strategically against the car and she puts it on a selfie timer. The four of us pose in front of the gingerbread house for the picture, our boots sinking into the plush snow. I stand behind Belly and I wrap my arms around her waist, trying to keep her warm. I could feel her shivering in my arms and I worry that her coat isn't warm enough. It was freezing but I think that's what made the pictures turn out even funnier. We all looked like we were freezing our asses off with red noses and teeth-chattering smiles but Taylor makes us take a few more until we get "the good ones".

"Tay, I love you with all of my heart." Steven laughs, rubbing his hands together. "But if we stay out here any longer, we just might get frostbite."

"Good thing we know a doctor." Taylor shoots a sarcastic look in my direction.

Almost. I was almost a doctor but I don't correct her. I just laugh.

"Okay, just one more!" Taylor laughs as she runs back to us, trudging through the snow. "Make this one count! Look cute!"

"How's this for cute?" Steven kisses her for the picture.

I act fast and I dip Belly for the picture to kiss her. The phone camera flashes to take the photo then I stand her back upright. I can't tell if her cheeks are rosy from the temperature outside or from me abruptly kissing her. Maybe a little bit of both. I brush some snow that looks like powdered sugar off of her nose and a small giggle escapes her lips as she smiles at me.

"Wait, Conrad that was so cute! Do it again!" Taylor gasps when she runs to her phone and sees the picture. "Let's just do one of you guys real quick!"

Belly's laugh is like a little kids when I dip her again for the picture. I hold the pose as snowflakes fall into our eyes and hair. I try to shield her face with my own and I fail miserably as the snow comes down on us. Her eyes sparkle as bright as the lights and I lean down to press a soft kiss to her lips. We both laugh when our frozen noses collide but our lips warm each other right up. We hold the pose and kiss as Taylor takes a few pictures of us, smiling so hard our cheeks hurt. With the gingerbread house and Christmas lights as the backdrop, it felt pretty magical. Yup, this was definitely going to be my new screensaver for my phone.

"Ugh, adorable!" Taylor smiles. "Okay, now our turn!"

Belly and I walk up to Taylor, holding hands, then Belly releases my hand to take her phone. Steven and Taylor do a couple of poses for their pictures. He dips her for one then they hold out her ring, kissing each other. They do a few poses for engaged couples that Taylor had seen on Pinterest somewhere and all I can think is I can't wait to do all of those poses with Belly once we're engaged. I smile at Belly as she is taking the pictures. I can't say I've ever looked forward to a photoshoot before but when it came to Belly, I looked forward to it all. It reminds me to start looking for a photographer when I'm back in the city to capture our big moment.

Once Taylor is satisfied with the pictures, we all run back to the car, dodging the snow.

Conrad opens the door for me and I steal a kiss on his cheek before he closes the door. I can tell it takes him by surprise because he nearly blushes as he closes the door.

Steven turns up the heater once we're all back inside of his car and I was so happy that he had kept the car running because I don't think my coat was doing me much favors. My entire body was shaking to the point that my knee kept running into Conrad's. He notices right away as he points the heater vents towards me and it blasts hot air. Conrad takes off his coat and he drapes it over me. I try to fight him on it, knowing he had to be cold too, but he ignores me. I can't help but feel automatically better. Warmer. Happier. His coat smells exactly like him and somehow I feel a warmth wash over me inside of my heart. He had always looked out for me like this. He scoots closer to me, wrapping his arm around me as his hands rub up and down my arms to keep me warm.

I rest my head into his shoulder, muttering a soft "thank you".

And he just kisses my hair. "Anytime."

I close my eyes as I lean into him, letting my head rest on his shoulder.

I let Conrad take care of me. I let him take the lead. And my mother's words cross my mind: "Just let him love you, Bean."

Yours by Ella Henderson plays on the car radio as they drive away and every word seems to hit Belly harder than the last:

I wear your winter coat

The one you love to wear

So I keep feeling close

To us beyond compare

The moments waking up

You catch me in your eyes

That beauty on my pillow

That holds me in the night

And I will find my strength to un-tape my mouth

When I used to be afraid of the words

But with you I've learned just to let it out

Now my heart is ready to burst

'Cause I, I feel like I'm ready for love

And I wanna be your everything and more

And I know every day you say it

But I just want you to be sure

That I am yours

I sneak peaks at Conrad as I rest my head on his shoulder through the entire song, falling for him harder than the snowflakes falling outside.

Conrad:

"Tay, I really hope those pictures were worth it because we're never doing that again." Steven laughs on the drive back home.

"Oh, they were so worth it!" Taylor giggles then she turns in her seat to show Belly her phone. "Oh my god! You guys look like you're engaged in this one!"

"Taylor!" Belly blushes, lifting her head from my shoulder, to look at the pictures.

Steven, Taylor, and I exchange quick amused smiles at Taylor's comment while Belly just keeps her head down, scrolling through the pictures, completely oblivious. We were all in on it except for her and it was pretty funny because Belly had no idea how spot-on Taylor's comment was. We were almost engaged. In my head and heart, we practically were. The ring was completely paid for now. In fact, it was being custom-made as we speak. There was a reason I had been spent the past three weekends away from her. I had been pretty busy getting everything ready.

When we pull up to the house, I notice right away when Steven doesn't pull into the driveway which is where they had been parked before. They just pull up to the curb as if they're dropping us off.

"Wait, are you guys not staying the night?" Belly asks, picking up on it too.

"You couldn't pay me to sleep in the same bed I've had since high school." Steven laughs. "Besides, Taylor's parents said we could stay in the guest bedroom so we're just going to crash there tonight."

Belly and I exchange a look then we look away, biting back smiles. We both knew what that meant. We had the house to ourselves. All of the lights inside of the house were off now. Laurel and Cleveland had to be asleep. It was past midnight. I wondered if that was what they were trying to do – give us some alone time since we hadn't seen each other in three weeks.

"Also, we need to do this more." Steven grins at us in the rearview mirror. "We've missed you guys."

"Agreed." I smirk. "We'll have to make a trip down to come see you guys before the wedding."

Belly seems surprised at my comment and she smiles. "Yeah, that would be fun!"

"How about we grab breakfast tomorrow before you guys head out?" Taylor suggests, mostly looking at Belly. "Oh, and I'll text you all of the pictures from tonight! You're going to love me!"

"Okay, yeah." Belly smiles after we nod at each other. "We'll see you guys in the morning?"

"See you two lovebirds in the morning." Steven winks at me in the rearview. "Don't do anything we wouldn't do."

"Ew, Steven." Taylor and Belly say at the same time.

I just chuckle under my breath. They were definitely trying to give us time alone but I wasn't complaining.

"Thanks again, guys." I laugh as Belly and I start to get out of the car. "We'll see you in the morning. Happy Thanksgiving."

We wave at them as they drive away then Belly and I turn to face each other on the sidewalk. It was so cold that we could see our breaths in the air and there was almost a nervous energy between us now that we were finally alone. I laugh at how much my winter coat is drowning her. It was practically a dress on her at this point. Could she be any cuter?

"What?" She looks at me funny.

"Warm enough?" I laugh, gesturing towards my coat that is practically swallowing her.

She looks down then when she looks back up at me, we burst into laughter. We hold hands as we start to walk back up to the house.

"Thanks for going." Belly smiles to herself as we walk. "I don't think I've ever had that much fun on a double date before, even if we did almost get hypothermia." She laughs.

"Me neither." I laugh with her, our hands swaying. "And it's no problem. I love your family."

"I hope you know how much my family loves you." Belly says when we reach the door. "I'm pretty sure my mom was more excited to see you than she was to see me or Steven." She jokes.

"Thank you all for inviting me." I nod, letting out a breath. "It's been awhile since I've had a true Thanksgiving like this."

I loved that I didn't even have to mention my mom. Belly just understood right away.

"You're always invited, Conrad." She smiles. "You're part of the family. Always have been, always will be."

I smile at her. She had no idea how much I had missed holidays with the Conklins. With her.

"So, on a scale of one to ten." She steps closer, tilting her head up at me. "How likely is it that you'll stay with me in my room tonight?"

I let out a nervous chuckle, stumbling over my words a bit. "Are you sure Laurel's okay with that?"

Even though we were old enough to share a room, I still wanted to tread lightly while staying under Laurel's roof. It was her house, her rules. With an engagement on the horizon, it was the least I could do.

"I'm sure she doesn't care." Belly shrugs. "You can do no wrong in my mom's eyes, Conrad. She is like your biggest fan in case you didn't know." She teases. "My entire family is actually."

"Well, I'm a big fan of your family." I step closer, smirking, towering over her.

I was such a big fan that I couldn't wait to marry into her family but I keep that part to myself. At least for now.

"So will you?" She steps closer, batting those irresistible chocolate eyes at me. "Please? For me?"

I step closer, thinking out loud. I wasn't ready for the night to be over with her just yet.

"Okay, but we still have to do one thing first."

She squints. "We do?"

I nod, closing the space in between us, lifting her chin with one finger. "I promised you a date, remember?"

She just laughs. "Conrad, you just took me out on one."

"That doesn't count." I smirk. "I promised you a date, just you and me."

"True." She blushes, remembering my words from earlier. "But nothing is open right now. It's almost one in the morning and it's Thanksgiving." She laughs.

"Who said anything about leaving?" I wink. "I think I know just the spot."

We end up stargazing in her front yard, just like we had done for Valentines Day all those years back.

The snow had eased up by now which had worked out in our favor. It was cold so I grab an extra coat for her but there was nothing hot apple cider couldn't fix. I fill up a thermos with some of the leftover hot apple cider from dinner and Belly lays out a sea of blankets over the frosted grass. The world felt incredibly still and quiet as we lay down together, side by side. Music plays faintly in the background on my phone as we hold hands, looking up at the stars together. I use her hand with the promise ring on it to point out constellations and the Venus Star. She smiles next to me with our heads touching. The playlist is the one that I had made for her (one that my roommate Nate always gave me shit about) but I don't tell her that. I just let it play on shuffle and I start to wonder what song we would play at our wedding someday. How do you pick just one?

"What are you smiling about over there?" Belly teases me.

"Nothing." I smirk, keeping my eyes on the starry night sky.

Belly giggles, wriggling up next to me. "Tell me."

"If I tell you, I'd have to kill you." I look at her with an amused smirk on my lips.

It was a silly saying the boys and I would say to her as kids. She just laughs.

"Oh, I see." She smiles, looking back up at the sky next to me. "It's top secret, huh?"

I laugh, looking back up at the sky too. "Something like that."

She laughs again and I notice how much her breath shudders. I sit up to wrap the corners of the blanket around her.

"Is it too cold?" I look down at her, resting on my elbow. "We can go back inside, Belly-"

"No, no." She smiles, pulling me back down to her. "It's good."

Her smile on her face convinces me and I lay back down happily beside her. She finds her spot on my chest, tucking her head there, and I hug her close.

"I'm just happy." She whispers, closing her eyes, laying against my chest. "That's all."

Then she adds with a laugh, "The kind of happy that makes you shiver from electric jolts, not the cold."

I laugh, pressing my lips into her hair as she snuggles closer and I close my eyes too. My hand rubs up and down her back to keep her warm as I think about how much I had missed her these past three weeks. I realize as I hold her that I'll never stop missing her. Every second of my life that I would ever spend apart from her, there would be a dull ache in my chest, until we were together again. I would never get her out of my system. For as long as I live, Belly would have my heart, completely and without question. Even when we were married someday, I would count down the hours until I got to come home to her. She was the only girl I could ever trust. Ever love. Ever feel electric jolts for. I open my eyes to look back up at the stars, my mind still active and alive, buzzing with all of the thoughts about the future that centered around the very thing I was holding in my arms.

Then I whisper, "Belly?"

"Mhm?" Her voice sounds sleepy.

"I once told you that I couldn't be with someone who didn't make me feel electric either." I keep my eyes on the stars. "And I want you to know that the only person I've ever felt them with has been you. The only person I'll ever feel electric jolts for every time I see them is you."

I can feel her eyes on me and I look away from the stars to look down at her. She smiles and I reach out to trace her cheek. It felt like a privilege to be able to do this. To touch her and hold her whenever I wanted to. Because it was. I had gone years without being able to and I would never take it for granted again. Ever.

"And I never want to spend another holiday without you ever again. Not if I can help it." I smirk. "In other words, you're stuck with me, Isabel."

Belly laughs like I knew she would.

"You know, the whole being stuck with you thing doesn't sound so bad." She smiles. "I could get used to this."

"You could get used to stargazing at one in the morning on the verge of hypothermia?" I tease her, laughing. "You may want to rethink that."

"There are worst things." She laughs. "Who knows, maybe we'll make this our new tradition? Where we look up at the stars every Thanksgiving and freeze our asses off together?"

"And every Christmas, every Valentines Day…" I trail off and we both laugh.

Then she lifts her head to kiss me and everything inside of me aches for that tradition to come true. For this to be our reality. To spend every holiday, every day, together for the rest of our lives. She pulls away and we're both smiling. She reaches out to trace my cheek like she had done with mine and the electric jolts that pass through me at that moment make me shiver.

"We may have spent a lot of holidays apart." Her chocolate eyes hold mine as she cups my cheek. "But something tells me it was all worth it if we get to spend the rest of them together just like this."

I let out a breath. I couldn't have said it better myself.

"Come here." I whisper, opening up my arms to her, longing for her to be back in them.

She lays back down, her head finding the spot reserved only for her on my chest, and I circle my arms around her. We stay like that for awhile, looking up at the stars together. It was the perfect date. The perfect way to end our first holiday back together as a couple. The perfect way to end the night. We weren't even cold anymore; our love was a fire that would never burn out.

"Just a few more months." Belly says. "Just a few more months of long distance and everything will get easier just like you said." She smiles, looking up at the sky. "Just a few more months and we'll get to spend every night. Every holiday. Every day. Together. Just like this."

As she paints the perfect picture in our heads, I let my cheek rest against her hair. My heart holds onto every word as we look up at the stars together and I decide to give her something to hold onto too. A hint. A small glimpse into the near future. A future that was laid out in front of us, just like this vast and infinite starry night sky.

"And who knows." I smile at the Venus Star twinkling right above us. "Maybe that future is closer than we think, Belly."

Yellow by Coldplay plays faintly on his phone in the background as they dream of their future together:

Look at the stars

Look how they shine for you

And everything you do

Yeah, they were all yellow

I came along

I wrote a song for you

And all the things you do

And it was called "Yellow"

So then I took my turn

Oh, what a thing to have done

And it was all yellow

Your skin, oh yeah, your skin and bones

(Ooh) turn into something beautiful

(Aah) and you know, you know I love you so

You know I love you so

I swam across

I jumped across for you

Oh, what a thing to do

'Cause you were all yellow