Thanks Jess for your lovely reviews!

When your legs don't work like they used to before
And I can't sweep you off of your feet
Will your mouth still remember the taste of my love?
Will your eyes still smile from your cheeks?

Andrea had been quieter, Smithy knew, and he suspected it wasn't all to do with the recent funerals she'd attended. He'd caught her, more than once, staring at the phone Okaro had returned to her, even though, without the charger, which was back at home, it was essentially useless. He woke one morning and found himself alone in the house. He knew where she would be, though; at the Loch. That was where he found her, sitting on the stony shore, staring out into the water. He sat beside her, putting an arm around her shoulders. She had the phone in her hands.

"Aren't you happy?" he said. "I thought you would be."

"I am," she said woodenly.

"Well what's wrong, then? Anyone would think you wanted them to throw the book at you."

He tried to smile, but she gave him a small glance and stared back at the device in her hands.

"You didn't seriously want to face any charges, did you?"

"Of course not," she said. "But I didn't want to get away with it scot-free either."

"I don't think you have," he said. "And obviously they don't either, Andrea, remember Kit wouldn't have found you if it wasn't for Bruce outing you like that."

"I don't know that," she said. "I don't actually know how he found me Smithy, he never said he'd found me through that article."

"How else could he?"

"Electoral roll? There could be any number of ways, Smithy."

"And the most likely one is he saw the news that broke, like most people did, including you in case you've forgotten," he said, remembering the look of shock, horror and guilt on her face that day, when he'd acidly told her they all knew who and what she was. "Come on, Andrea, you've been through enough."

"I didn't want sympathy Smithy, and why do I get the feeling that's all that was?"

"Even if it was," he said. "It is what it is. And…I can tell you this in case you were ever doubting me. I would have loved you, no matter what. Even if this all hadn't happened with Kit, I would have loved you. And I would have come back. It might have taken longer for us to get where we are now but I would have gone back to you, and that wouldn't have been sympathy. It would have been because I love you, no matter what." He squeezed her to his side. "Come on Andrea. Whatever you did, you've been punished enough."

Andrea let herself sink into his warmth and pushed the phone back into her pocket

"I'm sorry," she said. "I don't mean to be such a downer."

"A lot has happened recently," he said reasonably. "I don't expect you to be happy, just because Kit's been caught. It doesn't make you forget."

"No," she said woodenly. "Smithy, when we go back to Sun Hill…can we stay at yours?"

"At mine?" he said, blinking. It wasn't as if he lived in a dive, but he always thought her flat was much more homely. "Why?"

"I can't go back there," she said. "I can't. Not right now. It just all feels so…tainted. By him, by Kirsty. All it will be is reliving the nightmare."

"Okay," he said softly. "If that's what you want, that's what we'll do."

And, darling, I will be loving you 'til we're 70
And, baby, my heart could still fall as hard at 23
And I'm thinking 'bout how people fall in love in mysterious ways
Maybe just the touch of a hand
Well, me—I fall in love with you every single day
And I just wanna tell you I am

She sank further into his warmth, wishing she could crawl right inside him. He wasn't like any other man she'd been with; not that there had been many; Kit, Marc and Phin, and that was if she really counted Phin, and she wasn't sure she did. Not that he'd treated her badly, in fact, quite the contrary, but as she'd told Smithy, they had just been kids. It had never gone any further than kissing and holding hands. Kit had been the Jekyll and Hyde, like none she'd ever known, warm and laughing one minute, than aggressive and terrifying the next.

Like the other time she'd now remembered, when she'd gone out with Kirsty and they'd been later back than she'd been expecting, as they'd missed a bus. Of course, she'd had no way to contact Kit to tell him so, and they'd just had to wait for the next one. When they'd gotten back to the hostel, he'd been pacing outside as if he'd been really worried, but in hindsight, she now knew it was fury in his eyes as she rushed to his open arms. Kirsty gave them a resentful look as she walked past into the hotel, and when they'd finally been alone, he'd brought up his knee painfully into her stomach. She'd gasped, and his fingers dug into her arms, keeping her upright as her legs gave way, and hissed in her ear that he didn't like to be kept waiting. Of course, he'd again been full of apologies the next day. He'd just been worried, he'd been going out of his mind, thinking about what could have been happening to her in the dangerous South America. She'd forgiven him, as she had the times before that, and all the other times after.

And Marc? Well, he had the pro of not being a violent abuser, but the cons of being a selfish, arrogant waste of space; useless as fiancé and apparently as a father, too. That was why she wouldn't turn her back on Olly, too. Despite Marc joining the search for him, she was sure he only did that because he knew what everyone would think if he didn't.

Smithy though, was nothing like them; he was kind, considerate, caring and though strong too, as she could feel each time he wrapped her in his arms, she knew he'd never use it to hurt her, or anyone else. He nuzzled his face into her hair,

"What're we going to do today, then?"

She saw he was giving her a way out of talking about any of it again, and looked up at him, smiling gratefully.

"Want to go down to Edinburgh? We can take a tour bus up to the castle."

"Sounds like a plan to me," he said and got up, holding up his hands to help her up. "Lead the way."

So, honey, now
Take me into your loving arms
Kiss me under the light of a thousand stars
Place your head on my beating heart
I'm thinking out loud
Maybe we found love right where we are

Smithy liked Edinburgh, he decided. It had the beauty of Glendarroch and the hustle of Glasgow at just a perfect balance. He stood on the stone stairs, staring out at the view of the city and smiled, glad Gina had made him go after Andrea. She came to his side, resting her head against his chest.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" she said.

"Yeah," he said. "I don't know why you'd want to come to London. Not that I'm unhappy you did, but…"

"A lot of people say that," she said and looked out at the view herself. "Like you said, small town girl, big town dreams. And when you grow up with it…it just becomes less special. Know what I mean?"

"Yeah," he said, and they turned together at the sound of excited voices to see a wedding party emerge from the church, the bride alight with happiness as she clutched at the arm of her new husband. Andrea smiled as she watched them.

"Friend of mine got married here last summer," she said. "It was beautiful."

"I bet," he said, as they watched the wedding party trail off. "The pictures must have been beautiful."

"They were," she said and took his hand. "Come on, let's walk down to the Old Town on the Royal Mile. We can get something to eat, I'm getting hungry."

"Whatever you like," he said, running a hand lightly down the back of her head as they exited the gates of the church yard. The walk down to the Old Town was short, if a little bumpy; much like the cobbled streets of the Royal Mile. Andrea directed him towards a pub called the World's End, much smaller than it looked from the outside much to Smithy surprise.

"It's named after the Flodden Wall," Andrea explained as he pulled out a chair for her. "It was a fort back in the 16th century that surrounded Edinburgh and protected the old town. This is the area just inside Netherbow Gate, the main entrance to the city. The people used to believe the outside world was no longer there. That's why this is called the World's End."

He nodded, looking at her smiling, and she blushed, misunderstanding.

"Sorry. If you don't want to hear the history, just say so."

"No, no, I love it," he said. "Every time I hear you talk about some history…even though I know you so well, it makes me feel closer to you. I wasn't laughing at you, I promise." He dropped a kiss on her head. "I need to run to the little boy's room, then I'll grab us drinks. What do you want? Scotch?"

"You do know me well," she said. "Thanks."

She watched him walk away and glanced around the familiar surroundings fondly. She'd spent a lot of time here when she'd been a student at the University of Edinburgh. In some ways, she was glad she had gone, even though she now felt she'd stuck her head in the sand when she should have been getting herself help, she had grown to enjoy university life and her studies had been a distraction

"Hello."

The voice was vaguely familiar. Andrea swivelled in her seat, not panicked but alarmed all the same; Kit was unable to get near her, but she was still wary of being approached, especially by those who were vaguely familiar. The man's face was like his voice – somewhat familiar, but she couldn't place it. He gave her a half smile, as if he was in on some secret that she wasn't aware of.

"Andrea, right?" he said. "From Bronte's wedding last summer?"

Then she realised who he was, Gareth Lachlan, the private investigator she'd met who'd given her his card, and her eyes widened.

"Yes! Sorry! Gareth?"

"Right," he said, and picked up his pint. "I'm glad to see you again. I wondered if I might. What, with the undercover job in London and all. I guess that didn't quite pan out the way you wanted."

Andrea blinked at him. "How did you know about that?"

He laughed again. "I'm a PI, remember. I can find out anything I want. I make a point of keeping tabs on people I take an interest in." He caught her uncomfortable look and said hastily; "not that sort of interest. Sorry, that came out wrong, and I can see you're attached. I just mean that you interested me, in a professional way. That's all."

"Oh," she said, still a bit uncomfortable. She guessed he hadn't been keeping tabs on her during Kit's reign of terror, or he'd know a whole lot more about why she was back, rather than just being outed for being undercover.

"So, what're you going to do now?" he asked conversationally as if he sensed her unease. "I'm guessing you're not eager to return to journalism."

"No," she said. "And unfortunately, the police isn't an option."

"No," he agreed. "But there might be something else. A next best thing. I gave you my business card at the wedding, do you still have it?"

"Yeah, but…" she trailed off and blinked at him. "Private investigation? Me?"

"Yeah, why not?" he said. "I'm always looking to take on people with a bit of savvy. And you can still investigate. Just not in the way you used to."

"True," she agreed. "But I'm not sure when I'll…I had brain surgery not long ago, you see, and…"

"No rush," said Gareth, finishing his pint. "Call me, anytime. We'd give you all the training you need, to don't worry about that."

"Thanks," she said, astounded. "Why are you here anyway?"

"Back at the scene," he said, looking around, then caught her confused expression. "Two girls were murdered in 1977. This is where they were last seen. It's become a cold case, so I've been asked to look into it. Crimewatch did a reconstruction on it a few years ago, but…" he shrugged resignedly. "Everyone deserves justice."

"Yes," she said and he looked at his watch, downing his pint.

"God, sorry, I have to go. I have a meeting at the police station about the case. Good to see you again."

"Bye," Andrea said, as he passed her, resting a hand on her shoulder as he did. Smithy approached, drinks in each hand, swivelling his head to watch as Gareth left.

"Who was that?" he asked, putting the drinks down and sitting opposite her.

"Friend of a friend," she said. "Met him at that wedding I mentioned last year."

She considered leaving it there, but didn't want to ruin their relationship by giving half-truths and hiding things. She'd done that enough already.

"He's a PI. Gave me his card when I met him last summer."

Smithy, his drink halfway to his mouth, set the glass back down, goggling at her.

"He offered you a job?"

"In a manner of speaking," she said

"And you accepted?"

"No. But I didn't…not accept either. I said I had a lot of recovering to do first."

He nodded, sitting back and picked up his drink again. He said, "Well it's not police, but it's the next best thing."

"That's what he said."

"But you're not interested?"

"It's not that I'm not interested," she said, picking up her own glass. "I'm just…cautious that's all." She gave him a glance. "Of…of…"

"Of men you don't know well? I get it. If you decided you want to, and he gives you any trouble, he'll answer to me."

The words were serious. Andrea gave him a slight smile and saw the fierceness in his face. He was so protective, as a boyfriend and a police officer. He'd always had the backs of his team, no matter what or who they were. She got up from the wooden chair and slid into the booth beside him.

"I like it better here," she said.

"Me too," he said, draping his arm around her shoulders, running his fingers up and down her arm. "Want to get some food? I saw they have a menu."

"Maybe in a bit," she said and rested her head on her favourite bit on his shoulder, her head fit perfectly as if it had been made for her.

"You're doing okay, aren't you?" he murmured into her hair. You'd tell me if you were really struggling?"

"Of course," she said. "I think if I learnt anything recently, its keeping things bottled up doesn't do anyone any good."

She took another drink, then decided to tell him.

"I used to have dreams. Nightmares really. Not about Kit. Not all of them. About my baby. Sometimes, I'd dream about seeing a pram. Just sitting there, somewhere. And I could hear a baby crying. But when I went to the cot, nothing was there. But I could still hear the crying, even if I covered my ears. It wouldn't stop. I had that dream for years."

"Do you still have it?"

"Not as much anymore. But still often enough. I used to think it was my baby coming back to haunt my dreams. As some sort of…revenge or something. No peace when awake and no peace sleeping."

"You know that's not rational though, right?"

"Yeah. Now I do. But I would have had a nearly ten year old child by now, Smithy. I shut that out for years but when Kit came back onto the scene, I started thinking again. I couldn't help it. Boy or girl? My eyes or his? Like him or like me?"

"Like you," he said. "All the way. You would have been a brilliant mother. There's no way any child of yours would have turned out like him."

"Thanks," she said and looked up at him. "Thank you, Smithy. For always being there for me. For forgiving me."

"I always would have done. I told you that. That's one thing I can be grateful to Kit for. He made it happen sooner. Even though I wish all the other destruction hadn't been left behind him."

Andrea's mouth twisted and she said; "Well, that's not all down to Kit, is it? You've all said it. Kirsty had the chance to tell the truth, multiple times. She never said a word. She put us all in danger. I told her, over and over that you couldn't charge her with anything she did in South America."

"Maybe she was scared of being extradited back there. Separated from Olly."

"That's what Angus said. Better extradited than dead, surely?"

"Surely, yeah, if she could have foreseen the outcome, maybe she would have told the truth."

"I doubt it," Andrea said. "Who was she, Smithy? The girl who died?"

"We don't know," he said gently. "Sam's found a police contact in South America and they're trying to narrow it down based on the dates. Kirsty said she didn't know and if Kit does, he's not talking."

"Sounds about right," Andrea said and sat up straight. "I don't think I'll ever forgive her, Smithy, but I need to find a way to live with what she did, what they both did. I need to open my Pandora's Box once and for all."

"Isn't that what we're doing?" he said, winding her hair around his finger.

"You're a great listener Smithy. You really are. But I need to see Sam's friend. Someone who doesn't know me, doesn't know Kit, doesn't know Kirsty. When you go back to Sun Hill, I'm going with you."

"Are you sure?" he said. "Not that I don't want you to, but you could stay here longer. Have some more time with your parents."

She looked wistful and said; "as good as that would be, I think I need to start rebuilding my life again."

"As long as I'm still part of it."

"Always," she said and leant forwards to kiss him. "I could eat now."

When my hair's all but gone and my memory fades
And the crowds don't remember my name
When my hands don't play the strings the same way
I know you will still love me the same

It was late by the time they arrived back in the village of Glendarroch, full on the pub food. Smithy helped Andrea out of her coat and hung it on the hooks, followed by his own.

"Cup of tea?" he said. "Warm us up a bit. I've never known anywhere so cold."

He went to pass her to the sitting room and she caught hold of his arm, pulling him back to her, cocking her head to one side.

"That's one way to warm up," she said. "I know another."

She slid her arms around his neck, pulling his head down to hers for a long kiss. He responded, his hands on her waist. He broke the kiss to look into her dark eyes, his forehead resting against hers. He wanted her. He'd wanted her for months, but had to know it was really what she wanted too, rather than just the drink talking – not that they'd drunk very much.

"We don't have to rush anything," he said.

"Who's rushing?" she said and took his hand, leading him into her room, the door of which he kicked shut with his foot.

'Cause, honey, your soul could never grow old, it's evergreen
And, baby, your smile's forever in my mind and memory
I'm thinking 'bout how people fall in love in mysterious ways
Maybe it's all part of a plan
Well, I'll just keep on making the same mistakes
Hoping that you'll understand

It was one of the moments that Smithy wished would freeze in time. Andrea had fallen asleep some time ago, but he'd wanted to enjoy the feel of her weight on him for a little longer more. He held Andrea in his arms, looking into her sleeping face, for what felt like forever. He'd shared a bed with her plenty of times, even before Kit came into the picture, but now he could feel all of her, and the touch of her bare skin on his, one of her arms draped around him and one leg hooked around his, was like electric. Smiling to himself, he rested his chin on her head. She murmured something and he looked into her face worriedly, hoping she wasn't having more nightmares. He curled his fingers around hers and lifted them to his mouth, kissing the fingertips. Her murmuring stopped and she smiled slightly. He smiled too and closed his eyes, letting himself sink into the mattress. It was time to sleep now.

That, baby, now
Take me into your loving arms
Kiss me under the light of a thousand stars
Place your head on my beating heart
Thinking out loud
Maybe we found love right where we are

They stayed in Glendarroch for another week before deciding it was time to return to Sun Hill, much to the disappointment of her parents, though she knew they were trying not to show it too much and she felt they might have secretly hoped she'd return on a more permanent basis. Andrea didn't think she could ever do that, though, especially when she'd lived in London for several years. Glendarroch was great if you wanted some peace and beauty but not so much when you wanted to live and work. She was just lucky she had the option to return whenever she wanted, without having to pay room and board. On their last night, Lachlan had insisted on taking them out for a meal at the Ardnacraig which they had all enjoyed immensely. Andrea watched Smithy laugh with her parents and felt something lift from her, as if after all the years of guilt and secrecy, now everything was in the open, the invisible weight she'd been carrying around was gone. No more secrets, no more lies. It wasn't quite over yet, but when it was, she'd slam the door on that chapter in her life, lock it, throw the key away and stop letting it dominate her life. It was time to move on from it all. On the train back to London, Andrea rested her head on Smithy's shoulder; her new favourite place to be. Fortunately, he seemed to feel very much the same; ever since they'd taken their relationship further, it was as if any hesitancy he had about touching her, through some fear of triggering something, had gone. She laced her fingers through his and gripped his hand.

"You okay?" he asked.

"Yeah," she said and looked up into his green eyes. "I'm glad you came."

"Me too," he said. "Gina's right, she probably would have been looking at my long face if I hadn't. Though, I'm pretty sure she said that just so she could have the cat."

Andrea laughed. "Who would have thought, the Inspector, so fierce, they call her the dragon has her heart stolen by a little fluffy cat."

"We'll keep that to ourselves," he said, giving her a knowing wink. "She says she'd like to keep her fearsome reputation intact."

"Far be it from us to ruin that," Andrea said. "When will you go back?"

"I'll drop into the station later," he said. "Catch up with Gina. I should be fine to return now."

"I'll go back to my flat," she said. "Pack some stuff. If it's still okay for me to stay at yours?"

"Of course," he said. "As long as you want to. But how long do you think…"

"I don't want to go back there Smithy," she said. "If I'm going to move on, I need a complete clean slate and staying somewhere he invaded, attacked a paramedic, dragged me off, where Kirsty drugged you…if I stay there, I'll never be able to stop thinking about it. I'm going to sell it. Buy somewhere else. I know it might take a while and if it's too soon to spend so much time at yours, I can find somewhere else…"

"No," he said. "You can stay as long as you want. I mean that. Anyway, you'll want to find another job, won't you, and that might take some time."

"Yeah," she said, thinking again about Gareth's offer. "I'll get onto that."

"No rush," he said. "I'm looking after you now."

She never wanted to be dependent on a man, in fact, her mother had near forbade her from ever depending on a man to look after her, but that had been in a financial sense and she knew Smithy hadn't meant that. She looked out of the window as the train passed through Lancaster and kicked off her shoes to curl up in her seat. May as well get comfortable, there was still a long way to go.

So, baby, now
Take me into your loving arms
Kiss me under the light of a thousand stars
Oh, darling, place your head on my beating heart
I'm thinking out loud
But maybe we found love right where we are
Oh, baby, we found love right where we are
And we found love right where we are

Song: Ed Sheeran's Thinking Out Loud