The Fourth Angel perished six hours ago. Misato was not happy.
She was standing outside the locker room, tapping her foot. She had to gather herself, readying to have this confrontation with Shinji. Who knows what he is feeling after what happened? Definitely not well, given his reaction.
Ritsuko delivered the report to Commander Ikari, who bluntly told them Shinji almost jeopardized the mission. He was to be interrogated about the circumstances and pursue a punishment if appropriate. Misato didn't want to do it, but her job demanded she had to. It wasn't what he did specifically wrong, so much as what he almost allowed to happen. If Misato agreed with Ritsuko on something, it would be that they couldn't have him screw up again when the time came.
"No running," Misato told herself. "Just talk to him. He's probably beating himself up as is."
With that, she opened the door.
She found Shinji on the bench. He wasn't in his plugsuit anymore. Instead, he wore a black t-shirt and his school pants after having taken a shower. He stared into the ground, a haunted look in his blue eyes. Given the bags formed under them, and the streaks that lined down to his chin, it was evident Shinji had been crying.
Misato wanted to wrap her arms around him close, but resisted the urge for now. It can come later, after the interrogation. She started with a question.
"How are you holding up?"
Shinji was so lost in himself he only now started to notice her presence. He huddled further into his seat, keeping away from her.
"You're not being punished." Misato tentatively said, privately hoping it wouldn't come to that. "But we were scared out there. You froze in the middle of the fight. Any second longer and the Angel would have killed you and your classmates."
Touji Suzuhara and Kensuke Aida. During the battle, the Fourth Angel threw Shinji over the mountains, causing him to fall right next to them. Shinji grabbed the Angel's electric tentacle to keep it from attacking the kids, burning his hand in the process while he let the duo into the plug. Touji repaid this act of selflessness with an attempt at murder, with only Kensuke holding him back from attacking Shinji.
The problem came after Shinji threw the Angel away from him. One of its tentacles managed to snap the power cable connected to Unit 01's back. The timer began to count down from five minutes.
"… when they entered, I didn't know what to do." Shinji told her honestly. "I wanted to fight the Angel right there, but… I didn't trust myself."
"Did it have to do with your classmates?" Misato asked. "Are they why you stopped?"
Time sped fast during Shinji's contemplation. For a good long minute, it looked like he was going to charge in and stab the Angel's core despite Misato ordering him to retreat. Thankfully for her, with just two minutes on the countdown, Shinji swiftly retreated to a nearby hangar. He deposited the unwanted intruders- Kensuke's camera had to be confiscated much to his chagrin- and got a new cable attached to the back in time to engage the Angel again.
Such a minuscule un-defiant pause made Misato reluctant to deliver any serious punishment. Ultimately, nothing went wrong and Shinji followed orders. He killed the Angel properly, leaving the city with two corpses littering the streets of Tokyo-3. Ritsuko should be having a field day studying them.
Misato heard Shinji continue to speak.
"Y-Yes. Sort of. I hurt one of them…"
Her attention was peaked. "You got into a fight with him? That's unlike you."
"No, that's not it!" Shinji was startled at her assumption, quickly shaking his head. "I wish he did beat me up… I deserve it after what I did…"
Misato was beginning to worry. He was being more withdrawn, more anxious than even the first day as a pilot. What could have happened that drew Suzuhara's rage toward Shinji?
"… Please, Shinji? Why do think you deserve it?"
Shinji began to cry again. He hated himself more than ever.
"I killed his sister! She's dead because of me!"
It was worse than Misato had suspected. "What?"
"I- I did like you said. I went to class today and talked to people. Touji was one of them and I-" Shinji swallowed a lump in his throat. "I heard him talk about his sister… she died in that first fight! I killed someone, and I don't even remember! I deserve to be dead, not her!"
In an instant, Misato dropped her stern demeanor and ran over to her ward. She hugged Shinji close to her chest, burying his face below her chin. She resisted the urge to cry herself, wanting to appear strong in front of Shinji. He needed someone to comfort him.
"Oh Shinji…"
"I'm so useless, Misato…" Shinji sobbed to her. "I should have died, not her! I'm such a coward, a weak, horrible person! I'm worthless!"
Misato didn't know what to say. Shinji paid the price for NERV's mistake. How could she make it up to him now, when he seemed more afraid and hurt than ever before?
Could she even help him?
Two days passed. It rained outside the apartment on an afternoon.
Misato thought having the day off would soothe her. However, that wasn't the case. She hadn't slept well for the past couple of nights. Her mind was swirling in tangled knots, too entrenched in thought to take time for herself. She was still in her long-sleeved pajamas, her hair undone and messy, small but noticeable bags under her eyes.
The paperwork and Ritsuko exhausted her, but they weren't at the forefront of her brain. Misato was thinking about Shinji, as she often did nowadays.
'I wanted Shinji to make friends at school, but instead he's closed off more than ever. He won't even look at me. I guess it's not surprising, given what happened.'
He missed school for two days, guilt ridden over murdering someone's sister, even if he didn't remember how. Perhaps because he didn't remember doing it. Misato hadn't explained the Eva's berserk mode to him yet, afraid that'd he run away if his worst fears about the Eva were ever confirmed. So far he kept to his room in solitude, only coming out in small intervals to make food or the bathroom.
Shinji was probably worried about hurting someone out there, just by being near them. Maybe he was scared of running into Suzuhara and facing the world's unforgiving consequences. Not too different from how she's afraid to make the first move on him, in fear of being hurt herself.
A loud ringing noise. Misato sighed, the house phone disturbing her navel-gazing.
"I don't wanna get up… uuuughhhh…"
She allowed the phone to ring for a minute, slowly getting up from the bed in frustration before hearing a small click. Misato thanked her luck that she didn't have to talk to anyone right now. It was going to be just a message on speaker.
"It better not be Ritsuko. Today's my fucking day off, I swear to god…"
Her luck continued, as it wasn't Ritsuko or anyone from NERV. However, she hardly recognized the odd nasally voice on the other end of the line. He was much younger than anyone she knew. Clearly, it was a teenager.
"Hello, hi! This is Kensuke Aida, you might know me from the Eva fight the other day? One of Ikari's classmates? I got this number from Hikari. Just, uh, letting you know I'm sorry for what Touji almost did. We know Shinji's fighting for us, and he's taking it hard. If he comes back, well, we'll try to make him feel at home…"
Misato hung up, pressing a button to delete the message. She didn't want to hear it, and she was sure Shinji wouldn't want another reminder of that day. What the hell she was gonna do with that boy now? Misato rubbed her temples in frustration.
"Should I approach him? Or do I wait…" Misato groaned. "Gah, this is so frustrating!"
Shinji was never going to have a normal life again, was he?
Asuka never gave her problems like this. She already graduated, she made her feelings painfully clear, much to Misato's chagrin. But she never had much luck getting through to that girl even before she failed when it mattered most. She needed a way to reach Shinji before he went off and did something stupid.
Or left her alone, a thought slipped into her head.
Misato shivered, before hearing a door slide open. Shinji was dressed in his school uniform, wearing earplugs to shut the world out. He strode into the living room without much thought, before he finally noticed Misato standing in front of him. He was quickly startled out of his trance.
"Oh! Misato!" Shinji put away his earphones. "I didn't notice you there."
Misato smiled. "Hey Shinji…"
An awkward pause. Shinji coughed into his hand, trying to regain his bearings.
"I'm, uh, going out. For a walk."
"In the rain." Misato snorted. "You're just going to get sick."
Shinji blinked in realization. "I guess so… it's just that I don't feel right being here either."
This made Misato frown. She looked at the clock. 2:00 PM.
"Why don't you wait for it to clear up?" She said. "The forecast said the rain'll stop in about half an hour."
Meekly nodding, Shinji took a seat across the table. Misato sat down, brushing bangs from her face. They stared at each other, reluctant to engage in conversation but having nothing else to do.
"Sooooo…" Misato wracked her head trying to think of anything. "You got something you want to share, Shinji?"
"Not a lot." Shinji shrugged. "The sync test were okay. Yesterday, Dr. Akagi told me I did good. You were busy with something, so I… sort of hid in the lockers to wait."
Misato sighed. "Not much of a people person are you?"
"Can't say so." He shook his head. "I'm not a natural like you are."
Suddenly, Misato burst out laughing. It wasn't a rapturous laugh, more a soft, understated chuckle that came from a mine being tripped in her head. Shinji couldn't help but be confused.
"Miss Misato?"
"Hahahahaha," Misato wiped something from her eye. "Just reminded me of what I was like at your age. To be honest, I needed a good long while before I got to being yours truly. You talk to people when you want to, which is more than I can say for how I was."
"What do you mean?" Shinji raised an eyebrow. "You kept to yourself?
There was an odd glint in his eyes. Misato knew he found a connection with her just then. Normally she would keep history about herself private, but now that she had him here it served as an intriguing ice breaker. Her smile turned sad, deciding to explain without explaining. He didn't need to know everything off the bat.
"When I was your age, Second Impact… well, you know how it tore apart the world. I was one of the unfortunate victims. Because of where I was… I took the brunt of the Impact and was rendered catatonic. All at fourteen. For years, I didn't speak at all. To anyone."
She felt oddly relieved to say it out loud. Even more when Shinji gasped in horror, understanding her previous plight.
"That's so horrible…"
"I know. What can I do, though?" Misato shrugged. "I got help and look at me now! I'm the Captain leading the charge against the Angels for humanity's bright future! Sort of. Sure, I'm a bit of a mess at home, but we're trying aren't we?"
"W-Well, I guess." Shinji stared at her in awe. "But compared to me, you're amazing… you're so strong…"
"I'd argue getting inside the Eva is pretty amazing too. You saved everyone twice by now. Give yourself credit."
Shinji grimaced. "I guess…"
The reminder of Eva made Misato decide to end this train of thought. She stood up, going over the balcony to check the weather. While the clouds were still dark and clumped together, it had indeed stopped raining. Misato had a wicked idea.
"Hey Shinji, rain's stopped. If you wanna head out now, you can."
"R-Really? Thank you!"
Shinji was prepared to leave. He got up from his chair, making his way to the exit before he heard Misato make a noise.
"Hold up a minute, Shinji…" Misato waved a hand. "You can't just leave the house without your date, hm?"
Now, Shinji was truly surprised. "Hm?"
Sensing his apprehension, Misato made a show of stretching her arms and yawning. Her shoulders cracked, causing her to moan.
"Oooooh, that hits the spot." She said a little loudly. "I'm feeling quite out of it here too. I'd love to take a walk around the town with the cutest boy in the neighborhood, if you don't mind me saying so."
"A- Are you sure?" Shinji couldn't fight the blush. "Don't you have NERV business or something?"
"Nope! Most of the paperwork is done. Minimal damage, thanks to you of course. Even more reason to dote on my favorite boy."
Misato seeing Shinji stammer over his words. She loved seeing him flustered because of her. He was easy to push and eager to please. It made her excited, made him predictable to her.
"I want to be with you today. If you'd like anyway. You can say no if you don't want to."
Shinji contemplated it for a minute. He then sighed, unable to refuse her.
"… go ahead."
Misato beamed. She quickly ran back to her room, taking just a minute to change. She grabbed a hold of a red jacket, wrapping it around the yellow shirt and denim shorts combo she had on. She also elected to bring a purse with her, letting the strap flow around her shoulder. took a moment to pat Shinji's shoulder, letting him know how thankful she was for the opportunity.
"You got anywhere you wanna go, Shinji-kun?"
He did not, in fact, have anywhere in particular he wanted to go. They sat on the train.
Among the faceless, washed out crowd of the train car, Misato sat next to Shinji, who ignored the world through music. She kept one hand in her pocket, feeling her sidearm, while her eyes were trained on the other passengers. They could be attacked at any point during the ride. She couldn't take the chance that something could go wrong, especially since security wasn't keeping watch over them.
She looked out the window. No sign of rain, the clouds still clumped together in grey. Didn't bode well for them, but she supposed with no destination it wasn't going to be a problem for now. She glanced at the SDAT player on Shinji's lap. She quirked her eyebrow in curiosity.
"That's quite an old model."
Shinji looked up at her. He took his right earphone off. "Hm?"
"This looks like something I owned as a kid. Aren't you kids supposed to get newer music players or something? Unless you're an old soul underneath that cute face."
He bit his lip in thought, trying to explain himself. Even his reasoning made no sense the more he thought of what he was actually holding.
"It was my father's."
Misato was interested now. "Really? I figured with… you know…"
Shinji answered the obvious question in the air. "It came as part of a box with other stuff. I was just about ready to smash it to pieces but… I felt this sense of comfort from it. It was the only thing he ever gave me, so I kept it."
He grimaced at the memory of him throwing the player at the wall, only to cry and plead for his father as he tried to fix it himself. If he had known what he knew now, that his father was a murderer, he wouldn't have cried for him. The SDAT player, as it turned out, was the only piece of his father Shinji felt like preserving.
"There were these tapes too… all they had was static noise. So I had to make my own playlist. Mostly leftovers from my teacher."
"Coooool." Misato cooed rather condescendingly in Shinji's opinion. "What kind of songs do you play?"
"Erm…" Shinji looked at the track list. "Songs from old stuff. I feel good listening to them."
He hesitated on answering her. The fact he opened up at all was pretty good in Misato's own opinion. Maybe he was feeling a bit better. She pointed at the unplugged earphone between his fingers.
"Mind if I gave a listen?"
"Hm…"
Reluctantly, he handed the earbud over to Misato. She made sure to rub it clean with her jacket, before placing it to her own right ear. She leaned her face close to Shinji's own, making him blush at the near contact. The lyrics came to life.
Anata wo michibiku basho he to
Tori no mure ga habataite yuku
She recognized the song in an instant.
"Oh! I heard this before!"
Shinji looked at her with surprise. "You have?"
Kawaita daichi ni aru no wa
Hibiwareta takusan no kokoro
"Yup. It's from an old computer game. Lilia from the Whys or something. My mom got me this CD of the soundtrack. We liked to joke about how the singer and I had the same voice."
"R-Really?"
Kikoeru anata wo yobu koe ga
Zawameki nimo makenai hodo tsuyoku
"Yeah. Actually, I think I can sing it. Lemme see, how did it go again…?"
"You are the only one kitto anata dake
Tozasareta tobira hiraku no wa!"
She gave it an honest shot, at least. Some of the passer-bys began to stare at the duo, with Shinji grimacing at the attention. Misato didn't seem to care though, somehow not blushing at the sound of her own voice cracking and wheezing.
"You must fly away yume wo sutenai de
Kiseki okosu chikara wo shinjite!"
She finished after only a few lines. Misato eagerly turned to Shinji to see what he thought.
"Well, how did I do?"
Shinji gave her a polite smile and nod. She simply shrugged.
"Oh phooey. No good, huh?"
"W-Well, you're not completely awful, erm that is…" Shinji realized his mistake the moment she scowled. "I mean-!"
"Ohhhh, someone's going to be washing Pen-Pen tonight."
"No, anything but that!"
"Heheheheheheheh!"
At her giggling, Shinji turned away from her to save himself embarrassment. However, he looked out the window to spot a sizable giant shape in a small distance. It might have been covered by crews and cables, but Shinji knew what it was.
"Is that the Angel…?"
"Afraid so." Misato explained. "We do research on the bodies you leave behind. So far, we've been lucky to get two Angels for NERV. Good work on that, Shinji."
Unlike before, Shinji decided to take it as a compliment instead of reject it. When Misato said it, he knew she was trying to make him feel better. It did make him feel better, he realized, because it came from her rather than someone from NERV like Dr. Akagi. Or his Father.
Plus… it felt nice to be this close to Misato.
About an hour later, they got off the train.
The clouds had parted some minutes ago, allowing the sunset to frame the city in dark red. Shinji and Misato walked down the street with a nominal sense of caution. They hadn't been approached while on the train, so they didn't expect to have an odd encounter. They still kept close to one another in case.
Tokyo-3 that had seen better days, they decided. Power lines were scattered to the ground, with debris still being cleaned up by construction crew and buildings having noticeable damage. Shinji realized some of it must have from his fights in the Eva. Even if he hadn't killed anyone, by all accounts he probably had destroyed livelihoods and homes in the process. Yet, people continued as if nothing happened.
Worse, a group in front of him started speaking words he'd never thought would be said about him.
"I didn't expect the damage done, but…" A passerby spoke. "I'm grateful we have that Eva protecting us."
"Hell yeah. We got lucky. It's the end of the world, but we're still alive. How amazing!"
"You kidding?! NERV trashed your house and you're thanking those sons of bitches!?"
"Worse could have happened. I'm grateful for any help we get. My kids are in school for God's sake.
Shinji felt a little bit of relief. It seems he wasn't as hated as he thought. He didn't deserve happy praise, but he still felt something right wash over him. It'd end soon, but it helped. He still felt terrible for how things had proceeded so far, and Misato could see it weighing on him.
Thankfully, as Misato turned her head to the left, she didn't to think of an excuse to distract him.
"Hey Shinji, look!"
They came across a tiny park off to their left side. It was no more than an empty block at most. The strings that held up the playground swings were broken from rust, the sandbox abandoned save for a half-finished sand pyramid, and a basketball court that only had one ball on the ground. No one was there to actually play the game, which Shinji found odd.
"No one here?"
"Apparently so." Misato grinned. "Which means no one here to interrupt us!"
Misato ran inside the court. She dropped her purse to the ground and took the ball from the ground. She began dribbling it, much to Shinji's embarrassment.
"Misato…"
"C'moooooon!" She taunted him, wiggling her hips. "Bet you can't beat me!"
Shinji couldn't stop a snort. "You're taller and stronger. There's no way you'd lose."
"Try to live a little, Shinji! You can lose and have fun. Now get your cute butt over here and show me what you got!"
Shinji reluctantly went along with it. He placed his SDAT player inside Misato's purse before he ran up to her. She dribbled the ball left and right, keeping it away from Shinji's hands. She smirked,
"You think you got the moves, Shinji?"
He narrowed his eyes in concentration. He knew he didn't, but that smirk made him want to try out of spite.
"Go for it."
It went about as well as a match between an inexperienced fourteen year old boy and a military trained professional woman was ever going to go. She ran circles around him, needing no effort to throw him off and land the ball through the hoop. Shinji couldn't count the amount of times Misato won their little contest.
(About ten times, Misato made sure to count.)
He didn't mind losing to her. Honestly, Shinji couldn't keep the smile off his face as he tried to get the ball from Misato. However, with her taunting, teasing comments? He was starting to get frustrated.
Even more so when spun the ball on her finger and stuck her tongue out.
"Looks like I'm the winner here, Shinji-kun! Ready to give up? Run away with your tail behind your legs?"
Shinji wanted to prove her wrong. Badly. "You're the one who told me not to run away."
"That's the spirit." Misato's grin grew, as did the glint in her eyes. "One more round!"
He had it planned out. She was rushing toward him. Soon, Misato would grab his head and attempt to jump over him. He moved out of the way of her hand, and jumped to intercept her own.
However, he did not anticipate their bodies colliding so rapidly. Misato, being the taller of the two, fell on top of Shinji with a resounding thud. They forgot about the ball that missed the hoop, too busy focused on where their bodies ended up. Misato's chest pressed against Shinji's own, while their faces were only inches away from the other.
"Ha… sorry…"
"Me too, Shinji, me too…"
Shinji could smell the alcohol on her breath. He was too distracted by the sweat on Misato's skin to notice. The dimming sun's crimson gaze framed her face in a way that Shinji couldn't help but find beautiful. They also hid the blush on her face from him, as she seemed to be inspecting him for something.
"… you're not hurt, are you Shinji?"
He blinked. "Um, yeah, I am. Not hurt i mean! Are you… okay…?"
Misato didn't answer him. He looked so vulnerable and cute lying underneath her. She wanted to look at this face for longer. A brief snippet of her life flashed. A fourteen year old girl in her parents' bedroom. She covered her chest, staring at herself within the bathroom mirror. Half lidded, empty eyes. She had her wish granted, but it came at a cost.
Something in Misato shivered at the memory. She untangled herself ever so slowly from Shinji, trying to keep her voice steady.
"I'm fine… yeah, yeah." She breathed. "That's enough of the game, don't you think?"
She lowered her hand to him. Shinji took it, and she pulled him up.
"Yeah, I agree." He said in a whisper. "Where do we go now, Misato?"
Misato hummed. "I know this area. There's this place I like to go to, even though it's kind of a dump…"
"Doctor, the alien has escaped containment!"
"It can't be!"
"We have no way of stopping it, Doctor! The moment he hits the outside, humanity will perish! What do we do?"
"There's no other way. I will have to make the sacrifice myself."
"Then doctor… kiss me, before you go!"
"Very well."
By that point, the characters in the movie passionately kissed. Misato nearly threw up at the sight.
"Get a load of this crap, Shinji." She whispered. "Barely good enough for a lifetime movie. Especially with the romance. The man was in love with the girl, but he didn't say until he's about to die? Sounds like a coward to me."
Whatever Shinji murmured to himself, she did not hear.
The Tokyo-3 Revival Theater was practically empty. Opened six months ago, and already it was barely struggling to keep together. The cheap ticket prices and crappy popcorn showed the owner's desperation, the seats having foam pour from torn seams showed why people barely showed up. There was no one in the room but them. Shinji preferred it that way, as it meant quiet, and it let Misato get mad at the movie without being shushed.
They were watching a cheap sci-fi B-movie from the 50s. It was about a group of scientists in the arctic trying to contain an alien menace before it could destroy the Earth and all of humanity. Misato hated it already.
She wasted absolutely no time complaining about the crappy production values, bad acting, worse script, the premise, everything about it seemed to piss her off. It confounded Shinji, who even in his obliviousness sensed there was more to her frustration. She was angrier than during the last fight with the Angel.
"Erm, maybe take it a little easy?" He dared to say. "It's just a movie."
Misato turned to him, scaring him with a scowl. "You're not actually enjoying this, are you Shinji?"
"N-No." Shinji sighed. "Not any more than you. Still, don't you think you're being… I don't know, harsh? It's not like they were trying to make a bad movie."
"Too bad, they made one anyway. Bah!" Misato shook head head, "The characters are so unrealistic. The girl would never get this hung up over a distant sad sack like him. Total bullshit."
Shinji scratched his chin. "I mean, the other guys in the movie aren't all that much better. They didn't really seem to see her."
"That's just the writer's ego at work. Oh if I'm such a nice guy I can get with the hot girl. How conceited. Writers like that can't make realistic characters. Everyone has different sides to them. These characters are so thin you could probably roll them up into a paper airplane and get more mileage out of it."
"Well," Shinji couldn't really think of a way to defend the movie. "It's entertaining?"
"Sure. Entertainingly awful." Misato snorted. "I should bring Ritsuko to this. Or Maya. She loves pointing out the ways this movie fails at science."
"That sounds so annoying, though!" Shinji rolled his eyes. "Movies like these aren't made to hold up like that."
"Definitely. But it's so funny to watch Maya get annoyed at this shit. She's into the science of the future or whatever, so she gets hung up on all the scientific inaccuracies in movies. Occasionally I like to go out for drinks with her and Ritsuko. Maybe Hyuuga if he's up for it."
"It… must be nice to go out with people like that."
Misato rubbed Shinji's shoulder. "You're young. You'll probably meet friends eventually. I mean, you're practically the perfect gentleman."
"I didn't really talk that much, though."
"Exactly, you don't get to talk over anyone during a date." Misato stuck her tongue out again. "How's this one though? Enjoying yourself?"
"I am, actually." Shinji curved his lip upward. "You do the talking for both of us, I don't have to do anything."
Fighting back now, was he? Misato teased, "That's cause you have so little personality!"
"W-Well, you have too much of it!" Shinji was immediately put on the back foot. "You beat guys at basketball. No man would want that!"
"I've got a dozen boyfriends back in college that disagree. Maybe just get on my level, Shinji!"
"Y-You…!"
They laughed at their childish exchange. Who could judge them in an empty theater? Only the dead could see the belladonna lily blossoming in their hearts. Misato turned back to the screen, in time for the big reveal of the alien.
"PFFFFFT, HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
She had to laugh. The alien was a three-eyed, sharp tooth blob animatronic with spindly tentacle arms that flobbed everywhere. Even taking into account the movie's cheap production values, it was the the most pathetic display she had ever seen.
"IS THAT REALLY THE ALIEN?! I know movies before Second Impact can't predict aliens, but this is PATHETIC. It's just a guy in a rubber suit!"
"Y-yeah… It does look fake." Shinji had to look down at the poor craftsmanship. "I've seen Kamen Rider monsters with more polish."
Misato realized what he said. "You watched Kamen Rider?"
"Erm," Shinji was put off by the question. "Only some episodes my teacher had. I liked them. What's wrong with that?"
"Nothing, nothing, just surprising you of all people would like that. Figured they're a little too cheery for someone like you."
They were already ignoring the movie, but now they had lost all interest in it. Misato and Shinji talked, neither aware of how their hands found each other in the middle of their conversation.
The sun had set, Misato and Shinji began their trek back home.
They took the long way around this time, taking these precious moments to enjoy the city at night. Even with the somewhat desolate setting they saw before, there was new life to be found with its shining lights and bustling crowds. Sadness was buried in gratitude for their lives being spared another day.
Both felt more at ease now than when the day started. Shinji had enjoyed himself. Being honest with herself, Misato had also enjoyed herself. Going out with her friends was nice, but helping the boy she took in come out of his shell felt good in a different way. She was there to help a new friend out with his problems.
She wished she had someone like that back then.
Shinji could be a sulky sort, but he seemed to have accepted her. He was more responsive than usual, trying to joke with her instead of letting her tease him all the time. He wasn't particularly great at it, but Misato enjoyed it. She could already see he was smiling more than this morning. Going out today was a good idea.
She blinked when Shinji snapped his fingers. He turned to her, evidently having realized something.
"I forgot! Misato, we're missing some ingredients for curry. I think we should stop and get some groceries."
"Oh, sure!" Misato checked her purse. "I got my NERV card. We can make a little trip."
Thankfully, they found the same store they went the first day. Misato decided to wait by the counter, trusting Shinji to get the stuff by himself. She spotted him buy some garlic, onion, salt and water from a fridge. He did with an eager step, even humming to himself. He hadn't retrieved the SDAT player from her purse. Overall, today was a complete success. No need for a security team.
A group of students came out of a hall. They were still wearing their uniforms, talking among themselves though not loudly enough for Misato overhear. She couldn't help but narrow her eyes at them. She was half-expecting those two students from before among them. Instead, the group left without ever encountering Shinji.
'Maybe we should hurry it a little. We haven't really talked about his school situation.'
If he was attacked again, he might need to be pulled out. He'd lose the chance to meet people outside of NERV. She didn't know what they would do if that didn't happen. How would he even get along with Asuka? Or Rei, once she was cleared? Nevermind the social aspect, they needed to have good teamwork if they wanted to beat the Angels.
What will happen afterward, when the Angels are dead and everybody knew who Shinji was?
Misato put it off her mind. She grew worried when she saw him pause for a longer than a minute. Something seemed to come over him, his eyes darting left, narrowing in thought. He tapped the plastic wrapping around the Yebisu cans she liked. Misato, worried for her ward, approached him.
"Something up, Shinji?"
He turned to her, obviously conflicted. She wasn't sure why though. He looked down on the floor, opening and shutting his mouth. He breathed.
"Miss Misato…"
"Yeah, Shinji?"
Shinji hesitated. Was it a good idea to ask her? After the day they had? But it came to him now, and the question wouldn't leave until he got an answer one way or another.
"Well, I was wondering wh-"
"YOU!"
Shinji froze in fear. Misato turned to find the voice, immediately recognizing him and the problem he was going to pose. Three students stood at the other end of their hall. Touji Suzuhara, Kensuke Aida, and some other girl Misato didn't recognize. Touji glared at them.
"Missing school, huh? You tried to run away from me, weren't you?!"
"Touji," Hikari tried to grab his arm, looking back between him and Shinji. "Don't scream, this isn't the place for a fight-"
"Like hell it isn't!" Touji shoved her hands away. "I finally find this asshole! Where the hell have you been hiding?!"
Shinji couldn't even look at him. How could he, with what he had done to him? He knew an encounter was bound to happen, but he didn't want to face him now. Misato had to step in between Shinji and the other boy.
"Suzuhara, I'm sorry about what happened."
"LIKE HELL IT IS!" Touji screamed. "I DON'T CARE IF YOU'RE HIDING BEHIND YOUR MOMMY, BE A MAN AND FIGHT ME YOU COWARD!"
Kensuke tried to stop Touji, but it was in vain. The jock was on the warpath straight for Shinji. Misato had no choice. Pressing a button inside her purse, she grabbed a hold of Touji and threw him to the ground. She forced him down, ignoring the small crowd forming.
"Listen! Shinji told me everything." Misato whispered to him. "I'm sorry about your sister. We're responsible for what happened, don't blame Shinji for it."
"He's the goddamn pilot!"
"There's more you don't know about. We've sent your family a severance package as a consolation. I'm going to have to ask you to stop right now."
"I don't fucking care! My sister is gone so I'll get him!"
Hikari tried to get in, but Kensuke placed a hand on her shoulder.
"Nothing we can do right now. It's between them now."
Shinji stood there, watching Misato defend him like that. He didn't know what he had done to earn such protection. He wanted Touji to beat him, at least he would be suffering consequences. Instead, like usual, he didn't get a choice in the matter.
Men in sleek suits pushed past him. Misato finally got off of Touji, allowing the men to hold Touji in her stead. Misato grabbed Shinji's arm.
"Sorry this happened. Hurry."
She swiped her card over the counter, paying for the food as they practically ran out of the store. She made one last turn to the children watching.
"We don't understand what happened ourselves. We mean that."
With that, Misato left with Shinji. Kensuke and Hikari were left alone with Touji, who tried to fight back against the agents clearly sent by NERV. Hikari was the one who voiced their thoughts.
"We're never going to see that boy again, are we?"
"Nope." Kensuke shook his head. "Don't sweat it. Things just spiraled out of control. I feel more sad for Touji. Poor guy lost his sister, and not even that woman seems to know anything…"
The night was ruined, so Misato simply took Shinji back to the apartment.
They showered and changed out of their clothes, sitting together in silence. Shinji lowered his lead, subdued after what happened just minutes ago. Misato wasn't pleased herself. She had a quiet relaxing day with a guy she was growing ever more fond of, and it ended in a shit show. After a movie and everything! It should have been an easy slam dunk.
He cooked a curry for her with the new materials. Misato was grateful. If nothing else, having good food kept their minds off the event. Shinji was more subdued, still lost in thought. Misato worried she had ruined his life.
"I'm going to start filing papers." She told him. "We can't have you at risk of another attack from Suzuhara. Even if we moved him out, resentment would make it too easy for other students to pick on you. That's not good for you."
Or NERV, she left unsaid. Shinji nodded, understanding her logic completely. He was still needed for piloting so he couldn't be harmed. To an extent, he even agreed with it. He was prepared to face Touji's wrath, but he was also secretly relieved at not having to deal with anyone.
Shinji decided he had to voice questions he had now, while Misato was paying attention.
"M-Miss Misato?"
"Hm?"
"Those men… who are they?"
The men in black from before. It didn't take a genius to figure out they had to be NERV personnel. Misato answered him.
"Section-2. They're basically your bodyguards. We wanted you to live a normal life, but you're also a pilot. They stay at a distance but ready to step in to keep you safe."
"And keep me from leaving."
Misato grimaced. "That too."
Shinji frowned. He wasn't surprised, but he decided not to hold it against her either. It was her job and theirs. Still, one thing bothered him.
"Then… why did you come with me today?"
"Huh?" Misato blinked. "What do you mean?"
"You could have had them watching me today. I wasn't going to run away or anything, I know how important it is to pilot the Eva. I wanted some time for myself but you came along."
"..."
"Why do… all of this?"
"WARK!"
Misato felt Pen-Pen rubbing his head over her leg. She patted his head and smiled.
"You see this little guy? I met Pen-Pen in a lab. The scientists were doing awful experiments on him, not caring about how he felt. My poor little heart couldn't help but swoon over this tiny creature. So I took him in. It's not pity, exactly. I just related to him. Like I do with you."
Shinji's eyes widened. "… You…"
Sending Pen-Pen away, Misato stood up from her chair. She grabbed Shinji's soft cheeks between her hands. She leaned in, rubbing her forehead against his.
"You don't have to pilot or do anything for me to care about you. I want you, Shinji. I'm glad you're here, honestly. Living with you has made me feel less alone."
Misato closed her eyes. She heard sobs coming from Shinji, and felt his hands grab a hold of her own.
"I'm sorry, Misato… Even with my teacher, I lived mostly alone. I… I don't want to go back to him now. I don't want to be alone again. I'm… You… I enjoyed today because of you. I feel the same way about you."
Misato couldn't help but let her smile get wider.
"Of course. Welcome home."
Shinji smiled back, having realized what he should have known all along.
"I am home."
Author's Notes:
There you go. Shinji won't be coming back to school anymore, losing out on some support in the process. How will he react to Rei? Find out next chapter.
Reviews:
engel17white: There isn't exactly one nexus event that changed everything, so much as a lot of tiny things changed in the backstory that piled up to create a similar, yet off picture. It's like how the manga had Shinji living with his dad's family instead of a teacher or Asuka born in a test tube, or Kaworu being a crazy cat-killer. To use a metaphor, this fic is a different branch of the Eva tree, one that forms its own branches and leaves. Mostly, I'm doing things according to what I feel fits the story best than a strict adherence to the anime continuity.
Traitor of All Traitors: You did see the Tragedy tag didn't you?