He tried another time to ring the bell, he even pounded on the door, but although there was a light on, she was not home. His shoulders dropped and he decided to give up. He should have called first, but he had not found the nerves to actually pick up that phone. When he left Rosamund's, he went to her house directly hoping she would be home. Maybe she was working, she had told him what restaurant she worked. He looked at his watch, it was nearing 23.00 o'clock, should he wait? What if she did not come home at all. No, he thought she had left a light on, that would mean she had to come home tonight. He suddenly realised that maybe she was home, but she had seen him coming and decided not to open the door for him. He should just call her or leave a message. He reached in his pocket to see if he had some paper with him. His fingers touched an envelope, the same envelop he was carrying around now for months. He kept her poems close to his heart. He had almost left them in a drawer when they came back from Downton. But even though he had been in a weird state of mind about their relationship, he had not wanted to leave them at home.
"Ahumm" Scarping of a throat behind him, made Robert turn around. Cora was standing behind him, dressed in a sport outfit. Her hair was up in a bun, as always, some curls were dangling down.
"Hi." He said sheepishly.
"Why are you here?" Cora asked.
"I wanted to talk to you, I am glad I have run into you."
"I do not want to talk to you. I have been waiting for you to leave, unfortunately you stayed too long. I am getting cold and want to go inside. Can you please let me in my own house?"
He stepped aside to let her go to her front door. "Cora, please can I come in?"
With a deep sigh Cora walked inside, she left her door ajar. Robert hesitated, but he followed inside. He saw Cora disappear in the bathroom. Robert decided to go to her kitchen and make a cup of tea for when she came back. He was not even sure she would want tea at this time, but he needed a cup. His nerves were not calming down, he was relieved that she at least let him inside. It was something right?
It took about twenty minutes before Cora came back, she was dressed in sweatpants and a fluffy sweater. Her hair was still wet, hanging lose on her shoulders.
"I made some tea if you want?"
Cora nodded, she sat down in one of the chairs and took the cup from Robert. "Can you please leave."
Robert sighed. "I owe you an apology." He started, Cora did not look at him, she kept staring at her cup. "I had no right to leave you like this. I got mad that evening, I should have talked to you instead of walking away. It was not fair, and I left it in between us for too long."
"You did." Cora said quietly.
"But you also did not try to contact me." Robert suddenly said.
"Oh, so it is my fault that we have not talked since Downton? Please, if that is how you think about these last weeks you better go home right now."
"No, no. I was wrong for saying that. You had every right not calling me. I left you in a horrible way without any explanation. To be honest I cannot even fully explain why I did what I did. I just feel like my life is run by other people and I never have any control myself."
"Well, you took that control last weeks did you not."
"Oh Cora, I am so incredibly sorry. I do not think I can say anything to make this right, can I?"
"I do not know, you kind of surprised me with being here, I still do not know how to feel about all this. You made me feel so incredibly lonely these weeks. I thought we had found something special, but you proved to me that it was all an illusion. I do not know why you put me through all this, why bring me to Downton? Why let your mum bully me while you did not want anything serious? I cannot understand anything of what happened the last months. When you came to New York to bring me back to London I truly, truly thought we had a future together."
"We can still have that future. Can we not?" Robert felt his stomach cramp, was Cora saying she did not want to try again.
Cora shook her head.
This was not real; she was rejecting him. She did not want to try again. "I understand." He got up from his chair. "I am sorry, for everything."
Cora could not look at him, her heart broke in a million pieces. How could she ever try again, how could she rely on him not doing the same thing again. What if after a long time he felt bad and left this same way. She would not survive that a second time. She felt a tear run down her cheek, quickly she wiped it away. She did not want to cry; she had cried enough over the recent weeks. Especially the first days when he had stayed quiet, she did not get out of bed for days. Sorcha had dragged her outside and got some life back in her. But the thought this was the last time she had seen him, did hurt even more. She had still dreamed of their future together; she should be honest to herself. She looked up and just saw Robert closing the door behind him. She got up quickly and ran to the door. She flung it open and called his name.
"Robert, wait." She got down the steps and put her hand around his arm. "Please wait."
Robert turned around and looked at her, his eyes were shimmering from tears.
She took a shaky breath. "Do not go. I cannot lose you again." her voice almost inaudible.
Robert put his hand on her cheek. "I promise. I promise on everything that I have and am. I will never let you go again."
Cora got on her tiptoes and crashed her mouth on his, her body pressed firmly against his. Her hands roaming over his back, while pressing him even closer to her. One hand ended in his neck, playing with his hair, while she lowered herself. She kept her eyes locked with his deep blue eyes. She was sure that the relief she saw in his eyes, was reflected in her own eyes.
"I do love you." Saying this filled the hole she had felt in her heart, instantly. She knew it was true and she knew she would not love anybody else. She belonged together with Robert; they would figure out how to go from here. They had said it many times before, they would figure out how to let this work and they would. She had met his family; she had fallen in love with Downton, and he had met her mother. They enjoyed being in each other's company and they complimented each other in their art. Feeling his hands on her back was still magical, she felt her body tingle.
"We should go back inside." Robert said when he felt Cora shiver. "We do not need another cold, do we."
Cora chuckled and kissed him again. "Being bound to the house together would not be a bad thing, would it?"
"We can pretend?" Robert gave her a cheeky smile.
