Chapter 20

The Name You (Already) Know


After Kitty left Peter was out of the kitchen and up the stairs with the only plan in his mind being to get dressed in pants that weren't ripped, soaked in saliva, and smelling like semen. Not his finest moment, but he was obviously going to have plenty of worse things to look forward to.

As fast as he went, it wasn't fast enough to escape his thoughts as they started to capsize. For everything Gwen and MJ had done to get his mind off the clones and their public, quasi-incestuous exhibition, the feel-good haze Peter had gotten was now burning away, leaving only the morbid anticipation that once dominated his mind before his amnesia. Something that had, until today, felt so far away, it could have belonged to someone else.

But on the brighter side of things, before he would deal with that, he would be facing the self-reproaching guilt that could only come with blowing a couple of wads in the girls who his aunt cheerfully let into their home and saw as family. It wasn't sex with his own female clone, but probably not much better when it happened in the woman's kitchen.

He took MJ with him and cleared the distance from the kitchen to the stairs and then to his room in a blurring dash that barely gave her enough time to let out a little yelp of surprise, lobbed her on the bed and ran through his closet for a spare set of pants, mule-kicked his legs through them, and was out before she had a chance to speak or to discard her own jeans and search for the spare clothes she kept for just this kind of occasion. Which, really, said more about how useless his guilt actually was, since they already had a protocol for "Quick, don't let Aunt May know we were humping each other again."

That was probably why Gwen did not have his sense of urgency. Not more than ten seconds had passed since Peter had left the kitchen before he was out of his room and ready to vault over the handrail like the place was falling down around him, and Gwen was on her way up the stairs. "Your pants are kind of my fault so I'm gonna let you not carrying me slide but I don't want Aunt May to catch me smelling like your jizz too. Next time use that spider-strength and speed and take my ass with you alright? "

Normally Peter would have told her she didn't have his jizz on her face, because she ate it all – or the amount she didn't tongue-punch into MJ's gullet. Instead, he nodded tersely and was about to dart past her down the stairs, but she stopped him. "Dude don't fucking look like that."

Peter tried tugging away from her, sans spider-strength, but Gwen held onto him. "Look like what?"

"Like Aunt May is going to get a heart attack because of you," Gwen hissed. "It's Aunt May, dude. She didn't get a heart attack when she found out you're Spider-Man, did she?"

He looked past her and at the front door. From his spot on the staircase that had a view of the windows around it, and could see Sue, Kitty, and May at the driveway, talking. He watched as the younger women hugged her, which surprised him. He hadn't known they were that close… but she no doubt needed a hug right now after more than likely seeing the video.

"I don't know… I can't remember," Peter said, tapping at his temple.

"You know what I mean. She powered through that and she's still here. Her seeing a video of your clones getting off with each other is way less than that. She's caught you jerking off before, right? This is the same thing! …Kind of."

Peter looked horrified at the thought. "No, she hasn't! And I wanted to keep it that way until I died instead of having technical masturbation via oral clone-sex be how she found out!"

"What I'm saying is that it isn't as bad you coming home bruised and bleeding, or shot, catching you just after you jerked off with my feet and MJ's asscheeks- alright, that might be on the same level…"

He tried tugging away with a fraction of his strength, but Gwen held firm. Her hand morphed red for a moment, but she either didn't notice, or didn't care. "Listen, you need to relax. Yeah, she probably saw the video already, but it's not like she's going to kick you out or something, just because your clone got his balls drained. She didn't when she found out you were Spider-Man! This is nothing."

Peter wasn't even worried about that, if he was being honest with himself. May made sure that he knew that she was in his corner one-hundred and ten percent, and it felt… far better than he ever could have thought. It had done him a lot of good, knowing that. But his thoughts were still spiraling elsewhere, down and out… outside, to the sight of Sue and Kitty consoling her. Something that may not have needed to happen if it weren't for him, and what May dealt with because of him.

Gwen snapped her fingers in his face. "See, that's what I'm talking about, right there! Red, he's doing it again! He's kicking himself in the ass!"

"Peter stop it! You're going to bruise your beauty mark!" MJ called from his room.

"I'm not kicking myself!" He shouted back. "And it's not a beauty mark!"

Gwen crossed her arms, but she wouldn't let him past. "Y'know, it's a good thing you got a living clones, maybe you two can knock each other's heads in instead while girl-you sits on my face," she joked, but when he didn't even respond to the bait, she sighed. "Pete, get out of your own head. C'mon man, it's gotta suck in there."

"Usually does. Hasn't in a while. Not until today…"

He looked at her hand as it morphed back into a human one. It would have been in his best interests and his better judgement to get out of his own head, but as his thoughts continued to capsize, something occurred to him in the glaring void there where his memories were supposed to be. He was looking into it like it was a book, and not liking the synopsis one bit… "Gwen did you die because of me?"

She blinked. "The fuck- who the hell asks a question like that? That's what you're thinking about? Now?"

"Yeah, it is," he said, and rubbed at his skull as if it would make his amnesia go away like a genie from a lamp. Instead, it made him feel it all the more. "You died, Harry died, I can't even remember any of it- or even how Aunt May took finding out I'm Spider-Man-"

She groaned at the ceiling. "Ugh… yeah, so what. I died. I'm over that, we are over that! We have been over that!"

"You know what else you're not? Human anymore."

"Neither are you dude, and that's fucking awesome. Being a plain-Jane human fucking blows!"

"I'm a human," MJ pointed out.

"And you suck and blow!" Gwen called back before pointing between herself and him. "We're awesome! We're amazing, Parker! I died and came back better than ever! Now I can suck your dick like it's made for my throat and literally wrap my tongue around it and squeeze the jizz out! And you love when I do that! I make money wrapping my tongue around bananas like a tape measure, and that's fucking amazing!" Peter grumbled begrudgingly. It was a little amazing, sans the e-prostitution… "And you can make money dropping a wad into my mouth from the ceiling-"

"-MJ! She's doing it again! She's trying to pimp me out!"

"Gwen, stop trying to pimp him out! …For now!"

"You really do suck," Gwen grumbled. "Snitch."

As she went to his room, Peter went after her, stopping at the doorway. "But was it my fault?" he asked.

She kicked his door open, causing MJ to let out another, not so little yelp of surprise. Gwen ignored her, stripping out of the only clothing she was wearing besides her underwear, and tossed it into the room. "I dunno," she said honestly. "And… I don't really care. You'd blame yourself even if it wasn't anyway."

"Oh, he definitely would," MJ said, nodding in agreement.

Peter squinted at her. "Whose side are you on?"

"The side of your bettering mental health," she said sweetly. "Unfortunately, my worst opponent is you and this particular day of the week…."

MJ and Gwen looked at him like he was the problem… and he was, without a doubt. Because even with the both of them stripping down, MJ's bare thighs stretching out over his bed as she tried to get into pairs of jeans, or the sight of Gwen's bare ass and back – none of it was providing a distraction from his thoughts. But then Gwen turned, baring her hard, pink nipples on her perky tits for him to see, her hand on her hip and her expression bored...

Alright, it was distracting him a little bit. "I'm saying that if it happened because of me- if you and Aunt May and MJ have to deal with more crap because of me-"

"I don't, not really," MJ shrugged. "Not more than usual, anyways, but I'm fine with it. If I wasn't I wouldn't be here- and I'd be a stuck-up bitch that you'd be better off not having to deal with."

Gwen gestured to her as if to say, "See?" but Peter only pinched the bridge of his nose. "You stay out of this. Your judgement is already so poor it's buried beneath the poverty line. Just look at the guy you used to date," he said, pointing at himself.

MJ threw her non-fitting jeans at him, and Gwen threw her shirt at his face. Peter caught them both. "For the record, I just don't give a shit," the blonde said.

"And I do," MJ said. She snatched a pair of jeans away before Gwen could take them for herself. "But not enough to like, go crazy or anything. We already went over the 'oh no we have to break up because danger' or whatever, thing."

"I can't even remember the break up…" Peter said. "Which one was that? First? Second? Third- did we break up three times?"

"See? It doesn't matter because it was stupid. It was stupid then and it'd be even stupider now, but it's a good cover at least. And then you went and got with a mutant girl who spies on us instead of me-" She stopped and winced. "Wait, that sounds a little racist…"

"Listen to your second-best customer, rentboy. And pay attention to that last red flag, your ex might be a human supremacist."

"I'm not supremacist!" MJ groaned. "I just don't like that you decided to date a mutant over me."

"Supremacist and jealous, very attractive. You sure know how to pick 'em dude." Gwen walked up to him as he tossed their clothes away and pointed a – human – finger at him. "Now for the record, stupid, even if it was your fault I died I wouldn't blame you. Especially not now that I can do this." Even though she wasn't within kissing distance, her tongue snaked out of her mouth and licked the side of his face.

Peter snatched it before she could try forcing it into his mouth without even blinking. "Wash your mouth first."

He let it go and Gwen sucked her teeth. "I bet your girl clone would let me tonguefuck her throat after we sucked your dick."

Peter wanted to dig that image out of his brain and throw it at the wall. "My girl-clone isn't sucking my anything!"

"You and your clone got the same dick, so it still counts. Her fucking tonsils didn't just get battered and glazed, they got fucking coated and she liked every fucking drop of it," Gwen grinned at him, dancing her tongue in his face. Peter shuddered in disgust. "And, y'know, Red and I talked about how since you're so flexible, you could suck your own dick... Girl-You could probably eat herself out, too. I'd payto see either of those."

Peter looked at MJ, disgust morphing into bitter disappointment. "You what?"

MJ was halfway between trying to silently shush Gwen down and pretending like she hadn't ever spoken a day in her life. "I don't know what she's talking about," she said, looking cute.

"Jesus tapdancing Christ…"

"Point is," Gwen said, slinking her tongue back to normal, and jabbing him in his chest with a dainty finger, "Aunt May does not care about whatever amount of crazy crap you think you bring home," she said, waving her hand around. "Neither does MJ, and neither do I, so stop beating yourself up before MJ and I sit on your face and I take my tongue and beat up your prostate-"

Peter threw his hands in the air, turned heel, and marched out of the room. "Got it! Never mind! Forget I said anything!"

Gwen laughed and shut the door behind him. MJ called after him though, saying, "Put some dish soap on yourself to mask the cum-smell! The orange scent works best!"

In the room, Gwen sounded impressed. "Not lemon? How do you know what dish soap hides his cum best?"

"His cum smells too strong, the bleach-y smell breaks through. And I know because since it's usually over my butt I don't get the chance to hide the evidence as much as you."

"Sounds like a skill issue. Rookie."

Peter sighed. The both of them were right… but he felt like he shouldn't agree with them, and knew he wouldn't have before the amnesia. Which just went to show how much better he was now compared to then, since if he was so prone to misery then, he was so much happier now that he could barely comprehend what came before.

Hopping over the guardrail and jogging into the kitchen, Peter had just enough time to get some water in the sink running – with some orange scented soap – before there was a knock at the front door, and a jingle of keys. He heard May's voice calling to him, as it did every time she got home. Unfortunately, the picket fence, sunshine and rainbows of his daily life were a little clouded by knowing that she had, most likely, seen the genetic copy of the boy she raised fling nut on the internet…

"Peter?" May's voice called. "Peter I'm home!"

'And I had to be dropped off at the hospital for a stroke because your clones are sick, twisted, demented freaks. I'm very disappointed in you. Ben and your parents and that poor schmuck clone that was brainwashed into thinking he was your father are all rolling in their graves. You're going to be seeing a therapist first thing next week, and no Spider-Manning for a month…'

When he got to the door it was already opening, revealing the other ladies in his life that, with MJ and Gwen, made up the Fantastic Five Females that all possessed the poor judgement it took to want to stay around him.

Without even trying to, Peter would have already had a joke to break the ice. Something about ordering escorts and only being able to pay for one unless he robbed the nice old lady who he lived with. The old bitty would never see it coming… It was exactly the kind of thing Ben would have said to break the ice, but Peter never got a chance to say anything. Because May hugged him.

She didn't shriek at the sight of him. She didn't recoil, or look at him with disappointed judgement. She didn't yell at him or tell him to get out of the house or express disgust at what he had done, or what his clones had done, or switch tracks on her stance on Spider-Man back to what they used to be. Peter, as fast as he was, didn't even see her coming his way. The first thing he knew was that the door was open, and her arms were wrapped around him, and she held him tight like she hadn't seen him in a long, long time.

She buried her face in his neck, almost shaking. "I didn't think you'd be home…"

Any joke Peter had was ruined. It was bad form for even a worse comic like himself to crack jokes when someone in the audience was almost cryingand then trying to keep the tears inside. Especially when it was the woman who raised the idiot on stage. Bad enough she had to see him there in the first place… but that didn't stop him. The show had to go on, and he put a fake mask of a smile on so at least one of them would be in a better mood.

"I thought about running away," he said easily, hugging her back and entirely lying because, thoughts of technical suicide notwithstanding, leaving home hadn't ever crossed his mind, "But the same lady who taught me to listen to my elders also put a curfew on me. Kind of in a box here."

He was taller than her now, nearly at Ben's height, and she looked up at him with a trembling smile and a swallow as if she had a lemon in her throat. "The lady who raised you is an awful, stupid woman…"

Peter smiled gently at her and took her by the shoulder. "C'mon Aunt May, let's get you inside. I left the water running and forgot how to turn it off. Awful and stupid… must run in the family."

She let out a weak laugh as he guided her in. And once he was sure she was there and safe and sound, Peter looked at Sue and Kitty, particularly Kitty. Both looked sleepless and maudlin, as if they'd gone to the same burnout salon and got the baggy-eye special. "What the heck was that?"

Sue looked more presentable, but for the first time it struck Peter how similar she looked to Gwen – and now especially, as she looked like the other blonde when Gwen peeled herself out of bed at four in the afternoon. "Can we come in?" she asked, as if they had no place setting foot in the home, and hadn't bat one-thousand for him with their respective teams and resources.

Peter's mind spiraled more, starting a slow, downward tilt that he doubted would come back up for a while. "Depends," he said, stepping aside. "Do either of you know how to enact selective amnesia?"


While Peter got everyone together, his mind started to bubble beneath the surface.

He got Sue and Kitty to sit pretty in the living room, on one of the new couches that he and May had bought after the move. The one recliner there was an old thing from a thrift store that they'd bought for Ben – or for his memory – and beat in the street until it wouldn't dust up the house. Apparently, it was his favorite seat, and while Peter played along… he didn't remember any of it. Not even the move.

Sue and Kitty couldn't even look him in the eyes and he really wished he didn't remember why that was, but at the same time, thinking about possible reasons for it wasn't doing his thoughts any favors.

Getting May out of the kitchen hadn't been easy. It wasn't difficult, but it wouldn't have taken any effort on a good day at all. The only silver lining there was that the whole place smelled like orange dish soap instead of heavy petting and elsewise, but Peter caught the woman just… standing there. She was staring at the table at something only she could see with a far off look on her face, her jaw clenching and unclenching, her fists tightening up to the point he could hear her skin creak.

He turned off the water at that point and gave her a little gentle shake at her shoulder, as if she'd break into a million pieces if he wasn't careful. "Hey, Aunt May," he said, trying to put levity in his tone, "Could really use some back up here. Ex-girlfriend I don't remember and a pretty smart blonde who can isolate molecules with her mind- kind of out of my league here. Could use someone who knows the female animal."

She clutched his hand and held onto it tight, and when she turned to him, Peter still didn't see anything judgmental in her expression, but what he saw was worse: worry. It was like she hadn't even expected him to be there, and like he'd just stumbled home with a bullet hole in his gut, and was bleeding out on the front lawn.

It took a lot of effort to keep the fake smile on his face, seeing her like that.

"I… I have to do…" she looked listlessly to the sink. "The dishes! Oh God, the water!"

Peter didn't let her move. "Don't worry about the dishes," he said, keeping calm. "I can handle this much. Got years of experience, being you and Uncle Ben's free child labor. Not complaining, honest…"

May blinked like there were stars in her eyes. She couldn't even speak. As tight as she clutched at his hand, Peter's grip on her firmed by a fraction, and his heels dug in just in case he'd need to get her to the hospital… "What I do need help with is talking with the two girls in the living room Aunt May. You know how hopeless I get."

May made a visible attempt to shake herself out of her daze. "Yes, yes, I…" She took a deep breath. "Did you do your homework? Did you get Gwen's?"

"Yes, ma'am. At school, turned it in before I left and made sure to feed Gwen's to the neighborhood dog. The teacher doesn't even bother looking at our stuff anymore."

That got a smile out of her. "Did you rest?"

Peter looked off to the side so he wouldn't make it obvious he'd done more than just 'rest'. "As best as I could… You know."

"Yeah… I know," May nodded, looking off to the opposite side herself. "I can't ask any more of you than that."

"Sure you can," he said, hugging her so she wouldn't go off into her own world again. "Just say it with your chest."

He tapped at his chest, and her small, weary smile widened. "You sound so much like Ben…"

"I like to practice in the bathroom mirror when no one's looking. Now please, go be my bait against two pretty girls before I catch a case of teenaged awkwardness." He ushered her out of the kitchen. "Shoo."

After, he went and got MJ and Gwen, who had both managed to get dressed and were waiting on him. MJ frowned at seeing the look on his face, which had darkened even more than before. Even Gwen looked worried. "What's going on?"

He shrugged. "I… don't know. Didn't think the reaction of my clones' sextape would be like… this. Not sure if I feel offended or glad…" he said. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say they just left a car crash. Too bad it isn't mine."

They all went downstairs, and Gwen whispered, "Wait, that's Sue Storm? Jesus, we do look alike. It's like looking at a mirror of me in college, just really worn down…" She whispered to Peter, pantomiming jerking off. "You ever, you know, while thinking about…"

MJ elbowed her in the stomach before Peter could. "Not now," she whispered.

With everyone in place, Gwen and MJ sitting next to May and Kitty and Sue next to each other, Peter had no stronger urge in his life to not sit down in Ben's chair. Suddenly, running on foot to Houston and socking both his clones in the face for making him have to deal with this at home sounded like a much better idea.

Sue had taken a laptop out and set it on the table in the middle of the room, obviously for a presentation. Peter doubted it was a powerpoint piece on the pros of clonership insurance, and no one was saying anything yet. Being so good at running his mouth, he did one of the only things he was good at. But for once, he chose his words carefully, for May's sake. "So, did you two know I had another clone running around?" he asked, looking at Sue and Kitty.

Again, neither would look at him. "That's…" Sue started, but faltered.

"That's a yes. Alright…" Peter rubbed his chin. "How long did you know and not tell me? Couple days? Weeks?" he watched their expressions turn more and more miserable. More guilty. "…Months," he whispered. His tone dropped, and gained an edge. "You knew for months, and you didn't tell me."

"We didn't tell you because we didn't want you to know-" Kitty blurted.

"-Obviously," Peter said, the edge in his voice sharpening to that of a steak knife.

"You were dealing with enough at the time," Sue said. "You just got over… over the injury, and you were dealing with the amnesia and the aftermath of the other… clones," she almost had to force herself to say it, like it was some guilty thing. "You didn't have a say in any of this Peter. You didn't ask for it, and we just… we didn't want you to have to deal with it. Not by yourself."

Peter's thoughts boiled over, and his temper started to flare. "Sue, hiding the fact that not all my clones are corpses doesn't make things that easy for me," he snapped. "Not that complicated to bring up. 'Hey Peter, remember the dead clones you have? Well, turns out, they're not all dead!' At least then I would have been able to help."

"Would you really have wanted to know? After everything you've been through, all of you," Kitty said, looking him in the eyes for the first time. "Would you have really liked to know that there was another headache like this waiting for you around the corner? After the last time? When you're finally getting a chance to relax?"

"I wouldn't have wanted someone else to deal with it," Peter said, trying to stay calm, but his jaw tightened. "It's my problem- my responsibility. My burden! Not anyone else's, and you kept it from me."

"We kept a bad situation from you that would have hurt you," Kitty frowned. "…Because we care about you."

Peter's temper exploded like water on a grease fire, and he jumped out of his seat. He thought of Ben, of Gwen's father, of Harry, and of May and Gwen and MJ who'd already suffered because of his problems. He did not have the mindset to understand something beyond that, certainly not about what would have been 'easier' for him.

"Do you think I don't care about anyone else in this room?" He snapped. A vein his neck pulsed. "Do you think I want to go around having other people deal with things that are my fault? You and Sue already deal with enough crap with your own teams, Kitty! The two of you look like you have barely even slept! I don't need or want either of you dying on me too because you were too busy trying to help me!"

Kitty put her hands up. "You know that's not what I said or what I meant-"

"It's the truth and you know it," Peter spat. "It is my fault. I might not be able to remember why, but I know, and that makes it my problem, my responsibility! The both of you have enough to deal with without trying to help poor Spidey deal with his circus of freaks because he just can't hack it on his own-!"

He was about to say something, but Gwen and MJ stopped him. "Easy Tiger," MJ said, tugging him backward by his shirt. Her voice was calm, sweet, but steady with warning. "Keep the roars for the people paying admission. Inside voices now."

"Yeah Parker, try not to pop a blood vessel," Gwen said, yanking him back some more. "They care. We care. And they're helping you, so don't be a dick, Dick."

Peter tried to reign himself in. It wasn't easy… but they were right. Of course they were.

The old stress from before, from when it was just him and MJ and his secrets putting her and everyone else in danger, was coming back like a damn had broken. Peter didn't want that; he never had, but now he realized just how good he'd been without it. All the months since he'd woken up and remembered nothing, being able to magically skip the deaths of his two best friends, finally being able to be open with May and having her wholeheartedly support him, to support Spider-Man and to be able to be with Gwen and MJ... all of that stress felt so far away, all that time. Almost like it belonged to someone else entirely.

Kitty and Sue were right, he really had benefited from not knowing. Because if this is how he would have reacted had he known sooner, he could have missed it by a mile and stayed blissfully ignorant.

He looked to May, who couldn't even look up from the floor at him. And who could blame her? Bad enough sometimes she had to see the bruises and scars on him, and to wash the blood out of his clothes and wonder if he'd even be coming home that night… but now she was forced to see the clone of the boy she'd taken in get his dick slobbered on in front of a crowd like some kind of immoral, drugged up reprobate. And by someone she didn't even know was his female clone no less, but would eventually. And wasn't that going to make for one heck of a family reunion…

He almost couldn't bring himself to go to her and hug her, didn't want to hurt her or make things worse… but that was only almost, and he did it anyway. Peter went to her and scooped her up like she was nothing, because she was everything. He hugged her close and when he apologized, she just about broke down in his arms, but hugged him back even harder all the same. The peace in Peter's mind from the peace he'd been granted the last few months let him know that none of this was about 'responsibility' or him being a 'burden' to other people. He was still a drag on their lives, and an idiot… but he was the lucky kind idiot, one who had people to rely on to keep his head on straight, and put up with him.

And out of everything, he at least had Aunt May, and all that made him the luckiest spider-powered moron in anyplace, as far as he was concerned. Because who and where would any Peter Benjamin Parker, much less Spider-Man, be without his Aunt May?

Peter rocked her in his arms. She'd taken far better care of him in the months than he had on his own, with the months of proper sleep and diet making him easily larger than her now. He wanted to keep every bad thing from her, and Gwen and MJ- from all of them. Even if, and especially if those things were because of him.

Taking a moment to clear his voice and swallow down the wrong words and spit out the right ones, he addressed Kitty and Sue. "Look," he said, struggling to not sound like an ungrateful jackass. "…Thank you for trying to help me, but-" His nostrils flared and he sneered, trying to breathe deep to ditch the frustration that he'd carried before his amnesia. He didn't want it anymore. Someone else could take it. "No… no, that's it. Thank you, the both of you."

Neither Sue nor Kitty could meet his eyes. The blonde looked at her keyboard, and Kitty balled her fists, glaring at the ground. Both looking guilty, almost as if they hated themselves as much as he hated himself. Which was rich, because as far as Peter was concerned, they were batting ten thousand for him now… even if he wished they didn't need to.

"We'll always be there to help you, Peter," Kitty muttered. Her shoulders sagged. "We care about you. Just… try and remember that. Please?"

"Bit awkward hearing that from the ex-girlfriend I can't remember," he said, trying to break the tension. Kitty flinched at that, and MJ gave him a little kick at his foot. "No offense. Just… cut me some slack if I don't run to you asking you to solve all my problems. It's Spider-Man, not boy."

"Because you wish you were strong enough and fast enough to handle everything on your own…" Sue muttered.

She didn't look at him, but it was like she'd taken the thoughts right out of his head. "Yeah. Something like that," he frowned a bit. "Can't be the strongest and fastest all the time. My Uncle told me that," he said, his eyes narrowed. "Lemme guess… I told you about that before my 'amazing' amnesia?"

Sue swallowed. "Something like that."

Peter stared at her for a second before he dropped the subject. "Just perfect. So, how'd you two find out about the clone?"

Sue cleared her throat. "After what happened with the other… clones, I didn't think that was the end of it. Neither did Kitty, or…"

Her eyes slid to May, but Peter didn't need the visual cue or for her to finish, he'd already connected the dots. He turned to May. "You knew too?"

May didn't speak or even look at him. She only nodded, as if he'd bite her head off like he'd almost done the same to Sue and Kitty – like he remembered being bitten into in that dream that was, apparently, about his clone. But all Peter wanted to do was smack himself in the face. 'Jesus tapdancing Christ Parker, you really are a piece of work.'

"Aunt May, you didn't do anything wrong, alright?" he rushed to say, going over to her. "I swear- I- I wouldn't have wanted to know anyway. Sue and Kitty are right. If I could keep you from having to deal with this crap, I would. I wouldn't have told you; I wouldn't have told anyone. I don't blame you. Any of you, okay? I swear."

"That's what I'm afraid of," she whispered.

Peter winced, all too aware of how long and how much he'd kept from her. "I think you should be more afraid of the therapy bills we're going to need after this, because ho-lee-crap…" he tried to joke, just to get a laugh out of her.

That didn't work, and he shot a helpless look out to the rest of the room. Sue continued where she left off. "After everything, we started looking around. But the government operation that was behind your clones disappeared overnight. Those involved got un-personed. So, I looked deeper, and every once in a while…" she and Kitty looked at each other. "We thought we found signs of... a clone of yours going around. A sighting of someone webswinging in Baltimore at night, in Philadelphia. Other places too, and later… more violent. Drug busts, gangs getting stomped out… more and more violent fights ending with people in ICU."

She stressed the word 'clone' like she was correcting herself... But instead of pressuring her, Peter only asked, "Other places… Like a swarm of spiders overrunning city sewers?"

Sue froze. "…Y-Yes, how did you-"

Peter let out a tired breath and rubbed his eyes. He wanted to restart the day and avoid all this. "Let's just say I've been hearing some things too."

Sue nodded. "Well…With Kitty's help I tried making this algorithm to find more news, and a sleuthing program to go into the database of hotels where the news and rumors would come from. But most of it was just garbage about your movie, or outright fake. So, I thought about peeking into hotel and motel databases in the places more likely stories came up in to search for names I figured he-" Sue paused, then looked at Peter, "The both of you – would use. But then when the… video from Houston popped up and I finally had a clear hit-"

"Wait," Gwen muttered. "You've been looking for them for months? And you couldn't find them?"

Peter shared a panicked look with MJ and she jabbed the blonde with her elbow again before she could say anything that clued May onto the fact that she had a niece now. Gwen coughed and spoke carefully. "I mean, if there's one living clone, there's probably another- uh, dude, running around, right?"

Sue and Kitty shared a look a look of their own. May looked at the ground. "We were looking for… him, for months," Kitty said, just as careful.

At that moment, Peter saw a fundamental difference in Kitty's expression versus Sue's. And when Sue backed Gwen up, saying, "You're right, it's absolutely likely that there's another him out there," he had the sneaking suspicion that… Kitty didn't know. She didn't know about the girl-clone.

He stared hard at Sue and she made a point to look away. Oh, that was just fantastic… The stack of omitted truths was climbing fast, but he wasn't about to spill the beans. Kitty had already caught him in the middle of a kitchen threesome, she didn't need to know it was his girl-clone that had gotten her belly inseminated his clone's dick as well.

"It's difficult to find him," Sue said, her tone more factual now, "It would have been difficult to find… any of them if they had lived. Because they're you, Peter. A very smart young man. And… he's lost and doesn't want to be found, and knows enough to make finding him very hard. Even for us. Even for me."

"What about Professor X? Can't he just take that Cerebro thing and zero in on anything matching my brain?" Peter asked, looking to Kitty.

She looked uncomfortable at the subject. "After what happened with Jean- if… any Other-You didn't want to be found, Professor X wouldn't invade his privacy to do that. He respects you. It's ethics, and I... don't think any of you would be a big fan of the idea."

She made a good point. "Tell him I said thanks; he's one of the good ones. I'll send him a fruit basket after this is all over…" Peter grunted, "You didn't get a single hit all these months, did you?" Sue shook her head. "Of course not. Don't suppose you can get rid of the video though, can you?"

"The hell she can!" Gwen exclaimed, storming over to him. "You can copyright claim that! Get residuals! If people are beating it to your stuff, get your fucking money, dude! They already made a movie about you and stiffed you on the check! We talked about this!"

Peter sighed deeper, and put a finger to his now ringing ear. "Gwen, Aunt May is right here."

Gwen blanched, actually looking mollified. "Oh. S-sorry, Aunt May."

"It's alright. I'm a grown woman, not a crumbling piece of drywall, but thank you. And… Gwen has a point- about the movie," she said, trying to smile at him. "I'm okay Peter."

May put on a brave, laughing face… but Peter knew it was a lie. It was a damned good one too, because her stiff upper lip despite it all looked so convincing. "Okay…" he muttered, and thought about what Sue had said.

It was difficult to find his clones, and Peter could easily imagine why that was. In fact, he knew why. The thought of it all made him grimace because of course Other Me, A Disney Channel Special Starring Spider-Man, would want to get lost. If they all really were the same, his female clone's girl-bits notwithstanding, he could imagine wanting to just get up and take his problems with him so no one else had to deal with them. To just get lost, and stay that way.

Not that Peter himself would ever do that. Not in a million years. Even at his worst, Peter knew he'd be missed. He had responsibilities, and wouldn't be the version of himself to walk away from them.

But without even needing to try, he understood all the same, and could consider what the other guy – and girl – might have felt like. Because what if one day he woke up and found out he was a clone? What if he turned out to be just a science-fantasy wet dream with spider powers on top, only made for money and war and greed by a room full of people who'd seen Multiplicity while high on crack?

What if he were just a backup and cheap copy of the original fresh off the assembly line? A real life Pinnochio with that could crawl on walls… He wouldn't have been waiting around long enough for someone to tell him, "Hit the bricks, Sham-Spidey, no one needs a dime store knockoff of the genuine article," for him to get a clue. Peter would take his side-show act on the road instead of bothering the real deal with his cliché science-fiction existence. If he was the clone.

Fortunately, he wasn't…

Peter sighed. "Maybe we should let him stay lost then," he started to say. "For his own sake."

'And for mine.'

At that moment May stood up and Peter… had never seen the look on her face that she had then. Not even at Ben's funeral. She'd been strong then, serene for his sake until she'd had a chance to break down on her own… but now that stiff upper lip of hers shattered, and she looked terrified.

"No!" she said, bolting up out of her seat. She raised a shaking finger and pointed at him. "N-no. Peter, listen to me, okay? You… listen to me."

Peter pretended like she wasn't on the verge of panicking as he nodded. "Yes, ma'am."

"We need to be there for them, we need to… I need to be there. For you. To let you know that you're not alone. Not unwanted. Either of you, any of you."

"Aunt May, I know I'm not-" he almost laughed at what she was saying, it was so crazy. "Why would I ever think that?"

She looked heartbroken, giving him such a pleading look that was so hurt, so anxious, Peter wanted to punch himself in the face for even making her look that way. "But does he?" she asked, "Did any of the others?"

The question shocked Peter. Had they? Had any of the clones thought that May would be there for them, just like she was for him? And before she found out he was Spider-Man, before his amnesia, had he? Peter wanted to think the answer was obvious, but he hadn't ever thought about it. He hadn't needed to. As much as he knew what he would have done in their shoes, he would never need to be there because for him, May was always there.

But for the dead ones, those 'dime store knock-offs of the genuine article' that were 'fresh off the assembly line'… what had they thought was waiting for any of them after that night? What had been waiting for them aside from some unmarked grave?

He just didn't have an answer for that.

May leveled him with a stare as she gave him hers, and despite being larger than her, he felt six years old again, chastised by her stern but gentle lectures. "I told you that you can always come home to me. Peter I will always be here for you, no matter what-"

"Aunt May, I know that-"

She held up her hand to silence him. "I am not done. You should always know this. Now, I know I am not your mother, God rest her soul, but I raised you, and you are my son- I will always be here for you," she said, on the verge of tears. "Do you understand?"

Peter nodded.

"Then know that goes for any version of you. I do not care who they are, or where they came from, or what they think they have done. What universe, what timeline, or what sick mind in whatever God-awful lab or government agency that thinks it's a good idea to mess with the boy your Uncle Ben and I helped raise. You are our boy, Peter, and you will always, always be welcomed back home. That goes for any of you."

He looked to MJ and Gwen for help, because if left to his own devices, the other guy and girl and whoever else could all go and screw themselves as far as Peter was concerned, and they already had. But that was because it would be what they would want to do, because any clone worth Peter Parker's salt, if they were every bit as much him as the genuine article was, then they already knew he had brought enough problems and danger and strife to the people he loved the most already. As if three full graves weren't enough of a negative batting average for him, the last thing his loved ones needed was another one, or two, or three of him to add to the pain, double the trauma, and triple the tombstones.

MJ and Gwen, however, thought differently. They had different ideas, bad ones. Gwen just shrugged, not seeing a problem with it taking in his stray, possibly homicidal and almost certainly a murderer clone, and MJ gave him a leading look, as if he should know what to do. And Peter did. He just didn't want to do it. But then, the last time he didn't do the right thing despite knowing what it was, May had lost her husband, Peter had lost the second father he'd ever known, and Ben had gotten a nice, comfy padded coffin half a dozen feet in the dirt.

"Peter Benjamin Parker," May said, stressing his middle name as if he'd just broken a window. "Did you hear me?" Peter moved to hug her, to comfort her, but she held her hand, her voice going quiet, but stern and full of resolve. "Answer me, Peter, please. Do you understand?"

Peter hadn't wanted to think about this, or deal with it today. Or ever. He hadn't wanted to see her look so terror-stricken and at the end of her rope because of it. But at least it showed she cared… He worked his jaw, rubbed his forehead and clenched his teeth. Then, finally, he took a deep breath, and sighed. "Yes ma'am, heard you loud and clear… Fine, let's play Full House with my deviant sexpest clone. And however many others might still be running around. I'm sure it'll go over real nice. Who knows, maybe his girlfriend will come along for the ride."

He started to pace back and forth, but stopped just to give May a smile, just to cheer her up. "We can be one big, messed up, spider-powered family Aunt May… but I'm calling dibs on my room," he said, thumb to his chest. "Cousin Itt can have the basement."

At that, it was like a ten-ton weight was lifted off her shoulders. Her shoulders sagged in relief and Peter guided her back into her seat. "I'll sleep in the basement if it means knowing all of you are okay."

'All of you…' Peter thought. All of him, them… God help the woman when she found out there was a single female clones, and she had decided she was more interested in getting her tonsils blasted by her genetic template and technical brother than being normal. The conversation at the dinner table during the Parker family Christmas was going to be a real fun time this year.

Peter looked to Sue again, but she avoided his gaze, squirming a little. Kitty didn't know, May didn't know, Sue hadn't told either and… neither would he. Not right now. "If he even joked about letting you sleep in the basement for a second then he's not me," Peter said, hugging May gently, but his tone was utterly devoid of humor. "And I'd kick his ass out of this house head first."

May pat his hand to calm him down. "I'll take the attic then," she said. "It's warmer there in the winter, anyway."

"We're gonna need a bigger boat, Aunt May…" he grumbled. "Maybe I should look into getting residuals somehow."

"I… might be able to help with that," Sue said, trying to lighten the mood. "The F4 has lawyers assigned to us and I might be able to help and- you know- set up a trust or-"

Peter just stared at her, unamused and unblinking. Until she coughed and changed the subject. "Alright, so… I pinged through everything I could find in short notice that could be you. The algorithm isn't perfect but after all this time, its parameters would have picked up a name or something, but he hasn't done anything. Not checked into a place, opened an account, or so much as put his name on the map. We know he's been off the grid but it's more like he's been…"

May's hand reflexively tightened on Peter's. Sue didn't say 'homeless', but Peter knew where she was going. And he knew she was probably right.

"You said he didn't want to be found, right?" Sue nodded. "it's probably because he's cheap. He's me, right? And webfluid isn't exactly easy or cheap to make and rent prices aren't doing so good lately. So, give me some scrap money, a couple walls, a cozy sweatshirt and I'm kosher. In his shoes, I'd drop by a 7/11, pick up some baloney, mustard and bread and I'll be spectacular. The other guy is fine, trust me."

They did trust him, apparently, because his assessment visibly helped May, Sue, and Kitty to look less miserable. Unfortunately, it didn't help him that much.

"Well… he could be out of Houston by now for all we know," Sue said, letting out a little relieved sigh. "But finally, something had come up. It's not much, but it's something. A name."

Peter narrowed his eyes, racing through the chances of someone with his name or initials actually being him – or his clone. "The chances are too small to even crunch numbers on. How many Peter Parkers are there in the world? How many Peter Parkers in New York State, never mind Texas? And that's if he was dumb enough to use my- our name. Could have just picked a name out of a hat, or-"

"-I know," Sue said quickly. "I know, but- that's why it's a good thing that you know. You can help us- you can help him. What name would you have gone by?"

Peter snorted. If it were just up to him, he'd help 'himself' by getting the guy a ticket to Mexico and telling him to stay the hell away from New York and Peter's life for as long as they lived, but Kitty was all in on the idea. "Yeah, say you checked into a hotel or something, but couldn't use your real name. You want to go somewhere, but don't want to be found," she said. "What name would you choose?"

"Is that a joke?"

She took a deep breath, sounding as tired as she looked. "Peter, do I look like I'm joking?"

"You look like my ex-girlfriend who's a little too eager to find my clone," he said with bite to his voice. She flinched again, and Peter tried to calm down. "Look, I get it, and thanks for caring, but I really wish all of this was a joke. Last I checked, the movie they made of me wasn't Multiplicity starring Michael Keaton- and lemme tell you I am never going to be able to enjoy that movie again-"

May, Sue, and Kitty all said his name at once, ranging from tired, to pleading, to anxious. "-Peter, please…"

"Yeah, yeah…" He put his hands up, annoyed. He just wanted to get this over with. "If I couldn't use my name, and I wouldn't since at this point, it's a bit played out, four or five clones running… I'd go with… Richard Fitzpatrick, for my mom and dad's names. William Richards for her dad and mine, or…" He stopped cold as something occurred to him. His eyes narrowed. "You found him already. You didn't just get a hit, you already found a name you think I would come up with, and you know where he is. That's why you're asking me now."

Kitty and Sue looked at each other again, just like before. But he knew he had their number, and maybe a lot more than that too depending on just how pessimistic he was feeling now…

Peter already knew what name it was. It was so obvious to him he stubbornly didn't want to think that the other guy had chosen it too. Maybe, he could just keep something to himself. Bad enough he had to share his life and Spider-Man with his incestuous clone-siblings.

Sue confirmed his fears with a guilty nod. "…I think we did."

He waved her along with a miserable groan in the back of his throat. "Go on. Show it to me."

She turned her laptop to him. On the screen was some kind of list of names on a spreadsheet – a list of the most recent check-ins to the Houston-based Four Seasons Hotel, complete with the address and hours of operation of that particular hotel. The information was curated and pristine in just the way he'd imagine Sue would operate, and it all confused, bothered, slightly flattered… and concerned him. To have someone go through this much effort for Peter Parker… or was it just for his clone?

Where was that line even drawn? Peter's thoughts swirled like a toilet, down into dark places… 'Just a backup and cheap copy of the original, fresh off the assembly line…'

He fought to drag them out of there. He just didn't understand it, that was all. Was it him that was lucky to have people looking out for him? Or was it the clones? Was it his place to be grateful, or annoyed? Maybe, Sue really just needed something better to do with her time. She looked tired - maybe she and Reed were on the rocks – maybe it was his fault, too. Maybe and she just pitied him as a new project. He did have a knack for attracting girls with very bad judgement, after all…

Looking at the info, Peter recalled his dreams to see if the Four Seasons was familiar, but Sue had already said they only found the place just before the video had popped up. That was too recent for whatever weird crap his dreams were pulling to give him a front row seat to his clones doing a real-life reenactment of the tale of Narcissus, so at least he was spared that much.

As he scanned the document, he also saw the names he'd already listed as well as similar ones, off to the side. None of them showed up as contenders, either on the list or to Peter himself. He wouldn't have used them either - none of them fit. He loved his parents and he missed them, but in all honesty if he had to drop a name to go with a face that just couldn't be Peter Benjamin Parker anymore, for whatever reason and in whatever place, it wouldn't be related to Richard and Mary Parker. It would be…

His eyes widened just a little as he saw a name listed in scarlet. He tapped at it on the screen. Deep in his gut, he knew it was the one. "Yeah, that's him- me, I guess."

He let out a heavy sigh as he read the name out loud.

"…Ben Reilly."


A/N: I have been waiting a long time to write that part. I can disappear happily now. Maybe.