Chapter Four
Not Friends But Not Not Friends…
"You're an idiot."
"Well good morning to you too." Draco scoffed as I cornered him in front of the library. "What have you been doing at night? I haven't gotten a good night's rest in ages, Lyra."
I had been searching for him for two days, just so that I could give him an ear full for the stunt he tried to pull a couple of days ago. It was like he knew that I was looking for him though, because my brother was able to slip out of my sight every time I got close. It was infuriating really.
"What is your problem with Potter? Why did you try to get him expelled the other night?" I demanded, ignoring his question and his eyebrows raised.
"Why do you care about Potter?" He asked, then his expression darkened. "You're not joining his fanclub now are you."
I scoffed at that.
"No, are you daft?" I was about to explain that I had almost been caught with them when I stopped myself. If Draco knew that I was out of the tower with them he would ask questions. And if he asked questions, I wasn't sure what I was supposed to say. It was bad enough that I had been crying in an abandoned classroom till past curfew. I certainly couldn't tell him that…
"I just… overheard them." I finished lamely though Draco wasn't convinced.
"It's none of your business-"
"No, your business is my business Draco." I crossed my arms and his expression darkened.
"Don't start with me Lyra. Ever since you've become a lion, you barely talk to me. Like you said Ly, just leave me alone." Draco practically spat and I recoiled at his words. Draco pushed past me before he could see my expression crumple and I found myself staring at his back while he stalked away.
Clearly, he didn't understand why I was trying to put distance between the two of us. My stomach was heavy as I tried to gather my thoughts.
It's for his own good. He's an idiot for not understanding.
Taking a deep breath, I made my way into the library.
It was a beautiful day out- one of the last before the weather started to turn, but I really didn't want to wander the grounds alone. Again. As much as I didn't want to be doing Charms homework, one perk of being friendless was that I had plenty of time on my hands.
I was about to sit at one of the many empty tables when a mess of brown hair caught my attention. Hermione Granger was sitting alone, head buried in books like always. I paused for a second before making my way over to her.
"What do you think was being guarded?"
Brown eyes looked up at me in confusion as I stood above Hermione. While I had overheard Harry and Ron whispering about the midnight excursion we took, Hermione and Neville seemed uninterested. Of course, Hermione's opinion was the one I wanted the most.
I mean, if it weren't for her, none of us would have noticed the trap door the dog was guarding.
"What are you doing?" She asked, as I pulled out the chair across from her and sat down.
"Seriously, what do you think that thing was guarding? I mean it has to be valuable right? Why else would they have a Cerberus guarding it?"
"I don't want to talk about it." Hermione snapped and I raised an eyebrow.
"You're not the least bit curious?" I tried but she shook her head, eyes glued to the essay in front of her.
"Nope. It's off limits for a reason. We should not be poking our noses in it."
"Alright then."
Seeing that she wasn't going to budge, I pulled out my own Charms homework.
After a couple of minutes I realized I could no longer hear the scratch of Hermione's quill. Looking up, I saw that she was looking up at me, eyebrows furrowed.
"What?"
"What are you doing?" She repeated her question from before.
"Uh, the essay for Charms." I stated as if it were obvious and she gave me a frustrated look.
"No, what are you doing? Sitting here? With me?" Hermione spoke slowly as if speaking to a child. I felt my face warm and looked away from her suddenly feeling awkward. Maybe this was a mistake. Just like the fight with Draco. Why couldn't I do anything right these days?
"I can leave if you want." I said a bit dejectedly and reached for my bag.
"No!" She exclaimed. Madam Pince hushed loudly and Hermione lowered her voice. "No, you just took me by surprise. That's all."
"Good, now can you talk me through the unlocking charm you did the other night? I have tried it a couple of times but can't seem to get the wand movement right."
Hermione eyed me for a second before launching into a tangent about 'Alohomora'. To her credit, Hermione didn't push more on why I suddenly started talking to her so I didn't push any more about the three headed dog we saw. That first study session was what we needed to break the ice.
I wouldn't say that Hermione and I were friends. We sat together a lot- though I tried to keep the conversation away from anything personal. The distance made me feel a little bit better about our relationship. Maybe Mother and Father wouldn't mind when they found out if our friendship was purely academic. Hermione was surprisingly bright for a muggleborn.
Having someone that I could bounce ideas off of made Hogwarts much more bearable. Especially since Draco was being especially cold towards me. I had expected him to start to talk to me after a day or two. With most of our fights we were able to continue on like nothing happened but this one… this one was very different. Draco kept his distance and I had no choice but to respect his decision.
Halloween afternoon broke the routine Hermione and I grew comfortable with. Hermione and I usually sat together during History of Magic, so it was obvious when she didn't show up to class. I tried to think back to when I had last seen her. We had breakfast together and I remember seeing her in Charms but… I had skipped lunch.
"Hey, Lavender." I tapped Lavender Brown's shoulder who was sitting in front of me while Professor Binns droned on. The lesson was almost over but the nagging feeling in my stomach didn't let up. Both Lavender and Parvati immediately stopped talking, looking surprised that I was speaking to them. They would know where Hermione was, both always seemed to know the latest Gryffindor gossip. "Have you seen Hermione?"
Her eyebrow shot up and she glanced around the room before lowering her voice.
"I'm surprised you didn't hear, apparently she and Ron got into a fight during Charms."
It was my turn to look surprised. Professor Flitwick had decided to pair up everyone himself today so we didnt work together like normal. I had been too focused on my own attempts to levitate my feather… as well as not get hit by Neville's flailing limbs as he tried to levitate his. Clearly I missed some drama. I glanced over at the red head who was passing notes with Harry a couple of rows ahead of us. Parvati leaned in closer to us.
"It was pretty bad." She said, "I don't know what he said but she's been crying in the girls' bathroom since then. We tried to get her out during lunch but…"
"She wanted to be left alone." Lavender finished and I just sighed.
We weren't friends. We weren't friends… I tried to repeat to myself but I could feel the frustration start to bubble in my stomach. She had been crying since Charms and here was Ron Weasley not caring at all, passing notes to Harry like nothing had happened.
"Do you know what bathroom she's in?" I asked and Lavender's eyes widened a bit.
"Yeah, the first floor- closest to the Charms classroom."
"Thanks."
Both girls looked like they wanted to say more but I ignored them, packing my bag up. Professor Binns didn't even notice as I left the classroom. I could hear the whispers from the other students behind me but my mind was set.
I found Hermione's bathroom with ease. It was empty besides the largest stall which was shut. I could hear her try to muffle her sniffles when she heard the door open.
"It's just me, Hermione." I called and knocked on the stall door. I could hear some shuffling but the door didn't open.
"Go away." Her voice was thick with tears. My heart twisted as she let out another sob.
"I'm not leaving. I hope you realize you missed a rather riveting lecture from Professor Binns. He didn't even take attendance today so… I'm sure you're in the clear."
"Why are you here?" She hiccuped.
"Your missing History of Magic-"
"No." The door slammed open making me jump a little bit. Hermione's eyes were bloodshot, her face a little puffy from crying for so long.
"Why. Are. You. Here?" She spoke slowly. I was surprised to see that she was mad. "Why are you skipping class? Why are you here with me? Why do you care at all?! If you are doing it just so you can laugh behind my back then just leave already. I get it."
"Whoa, whoa." I held my hands up trying to calm her down. She crossed her arms over her chest, waiting for an answer. I knew that I couldn't talk my way out of this one…
What was I supposed to say when I didn't even know why I was here?
"Answer me for once, Lyra." Hermione snapped. "We only talk about school stuff, we never talk about anything personal. It's not like- it's not like we are friends."
Her voice hitched a bit on the last word and I saw her eyes starting to well up with tears. To my surprise, my eyes started to sting.
"I just… Okay, it's nothing personal but I can't be friends with you." Her expression fell even more which made me immediately backtrack. "No- it's not- this is coming out wrong. How do I explain this… I want to be your friend, and I do care about you but… it's complicated."
She waited for me to continue. I took in a deep breath trying to gather my thoughts.
"My family… and the people I grew up with put a lot of weight on blood purity and so being sorted into Gryffindor. The two members of my family that weren't sorted into Slytherin were both disowned."
"Why though?" Hermione asked, looking confused. "I get that there's the house rivalry and that Slytherin's don't like Gryffindors but that seems extreme."
"A lot of purebloods, my family included, don't like muggleborns, muggles, Half-bloods even. So, being sorted into a different house, I am no longer surrounded by the purebloods I grew up with. Being sorted into Gryffindor though? I am no longer surrounded by my friends and am in the house with proactive muggle sympathizers. It complicates everything. If I start to make friends in Gryffindor… well that just distances me even more."
Hermione's eyebrows furrowed.
"But do you believe it? That you shouldn't be friends with me because of my blood status?"
Her question was simple enough but it caused me to pause. I knew what Mother and Father would say. Muggleborns were inferior, stealing our magic, and didn't know what they were doing. That made them dangerous and there were no exceptions but… that wasn't right. Was it? I couldn't speak about muggles but Hermione was brilliant. A far cry from the inferior, clumsy person I had thought muggleborns to be.
My head had been telling me to not think about it for the last two months. If I ignored it, it was a non issue. If I didn't make any friends, it wasn't a problem. It should have been simple but it wasn't. It was far from simple.
"I thought I did… But I'll be frank, the more I talk to you, the more I question it." My heart ached as I let out a humorless laugh.
Hermione stared at me, analyzing me for a minute before nodding her head, just slightly. Something clicked between the two of us. I wasn't entirely sure what it was, but there was an understanding. I took a deep breath, trying to calm my shaking hands.
"Why are you hiding out here anyways? There are much better hiding spots if you are trying to avoid Weasley." Hermione's expression crumpled and I felt a stab of guilt.
"Ron was upset about Charm… he called me a nightmare and said that no one can stand me." Her eyes welled up with tears and she wrapped her arms around herself.
"Well, once again Weasley's wrong." I scoffed. "Clearly I'm here, standing your company."
Hermione let out a watery laugh and I gave her an awkward smile.
"You're terrible at cheering people up."
"Thanks, we purebloods are pretty emotionally stunted if you couldn't tell."
I glanced around the bathroom before pulling off my robe, laying it on the floor.
"If we are going to be here for a while, we might as well get comfortable." I said and sat down, using the wall to prop myself up. Hermione followed suit, getting comfortable. I was really just hoping that the house elves cleaned the bathrooms recently.
"I'm just terrified that if I don't go above and beyond I'll get kicked out." she mumbled and I made a face at that.
"They don't-" I started but she cut me off.
"I come from a family, a world where there is no magic. If I fail here, I go back to my muggle parents. They don't have any magical connections. I would be enrolled in muggle school and not able to pursue magic until after graduation. Do you know how terrifying it is? To know that magic exists, to get a taste of it only to have it taken away? I can't let that happen."
I didn't fully understand where she was coming from but I nodded- more to let her know that I was listening.
"I just don't want to make a mistake and get kicked out… and I'll be honest. I was really excited about coming here but Hogwarts is a lot more lonely than I realized."
"Cheers to that." I couldn't stop myself. Hermione and I both laughed at that, unable to stop ourselves.
I checked my watch and sighed realizing it was nearing 7:30. If we hurried we could catch the back end of the Halloween Feast.
"We should get going if we want anything to eat tonight. I'm sure you're starving after missing lunch."
Hermione nodded and the two of us started to gather our things off of the ground.
"Do you, do you smell that?" Hermione asked and I sniffed the air,gagging immediately.
A foul, sour stench had filled the bathroom. Covering my mouth with my hand, I looked around the bathroom, half expecting Moaning Myrtle or Peeves to pop out and yell 'surprise'. Both of of went quiet and my eyebrows furrowed as I heard a loud shuffling noise,
"What is that?" I asked, covering my nose. "Myrtle if this is your idea of a joke-"
I stopped short as something lurked into the room casting a huge shadow over the two of us. My stomach twisted uncomfortably. Something was very wrong.
Turning the corner was a large beast of a creature. Skin dull and lumpy, it was holding a massive wooden club in its crazy long arms, dragging it on the floor behind it. I had heard of trolls before but I never expected them to be this terrifying.
My second of relief that it hadn't been looking at us was quickly chased away as Hermione let out a scream causing its beady eyes to turn towards us. This was not how I wanted to die. The beast let out a roar and took a lumbering step towards us. I looked around the bathroom desperately trying to find something- anything to help us out. I was not going to die in the girl's bathroom.
Hermione and I both let out a scream as the troll knocked sink after sink off the wall with its club. I shut my eyes, grabbing onto her arm as tightly as I could, praying that this was just some sick twisted dream.
"Confuse it!"
A voice cut through the chaos and my eyes snapped open in surprise. My mouth fell open as I watched Harry Potter and Ron Weasley start to throw pieces of rubble at the troll. One piece hit the troll in the head and it turned around, blinking slowly in confusion.
"Oi! Pea-brain!" Ron yelled, throwing a large pipe at it. The creature let out a yell and took a step towards the red head.
"Come on, run! Run!" Harry shouted at Hermione and I. I pulled on Hermione's arm as hard as I could but she wouldn't budge. Her eyes were wide and mouth was open in terror.
Oh Merlin, we are all going to die tonight.
"Harry, she's not moving!" I yelled at the raven haired boy and the troll let out another yell causing all of us to flinch. Harry looked around the room desperately. The troll was advancing on Ron who had no way to escape- Hermione wasn't budging. This whole situation was impossible.
Then, Harry did the stupidest thing I had ever seen in my life. I watched stunned as a determined look crossed Harry's face. He lunged towards the troll and jumped, somehow propelling himself high enough that he coule fasten his arms around the troll's neck. The creature let out a loud howl of pain and started to twist, flailing while Harry clung to his back. When it turned, I winced seeing why it was shouting. Harry's wand was lodged straight up its nose.
"Weasley! Do something!" I yelled as Hermione sunk to the ground in fright. I tried to coax her to her feet but she wasn't budging. Pale faced and sweaty, Ron pulled out his wand and with a flourish shouted, "Wingardium Leviosa!"
The club flew out of the troll's hand and rose higher and higher before dropping onto the troll's head with a sickening crack. I winced as it swayed on its feet before falling flat on its face, shaking the whole room.
The silence that filled the room was deafening as Harry got to his feet.
"Is it… is it dead?" Hermione's voice was faint but both the boys heard her.
"I don't think so, I think it's just been knocked out." Harry replied though he kept his voice down. I helped Hermione to her feet, both of us shaking.
Bile rose as I watched Harry pull his wand out of the troll's nose and wipe the boogers on the troll's pants.
"What just happened?" I asked, stunned.
Harry was about to explain when the bathroom door slammed open causing all of us to jump. Professor McGonagall, Snape, and Quirrell piled into the room. Quirrell took one look at the troll and sank down on one of the toilets, pale faced. Snape gave me a severe look before bending down next to the troll while McGonagall turned towards all of us, lips pursed in anger.
"What on earth were you thinking of?" McGonagall demanded. "You're lucky you weren't killed. Why aren't you in your dormitory?"
Neither Harry or Ron said anything. I was about to tell her that Hermione and I had been in the bathroom the whole time when Hermione spoke up.
"Please, Professor McGonagall- they were looking for me."
"Miss Granger!"
"I went looking for the troll because I- I thought I could deal with it on my own, you know. Because I've read all about them." We all looked at her in disbelief. Was she really telling a lie to McGonagall? "If they hadn't found me, I'd be dead by now. Harry stuck his wand up its nose and Ron knocked it out with its own club. Lyra was trying to get me out of the way. They didn't have time to go and fetch anyone. It was about to finish me off when they arrived."
Snape tried to catch my eye but I looked away quickly. I had a feeling he knew that I hadn't been at the feast in the first place. My mind was going a mile a minute. Why didn't she just tell McGonagall the truth? It wasn't like Hermione and I would get in trouble if they just knew why we were in here in the first place…
"Well… in that case. Miss Granger you foolish girl. How could you think of tackling a mountain troll on your own?"
Hermione hung her head and the rest of us were silent.
"Miss Granger, five points will be taken from Gryffindor. I'm very disappointed in you. If you are not hurt at all, you'd better get off to Gryffindor tower. Students are finishing the feast in their houses."
We all watched as Hermione left in a hurry. My mouth was dry as McGonagall turned her attention back to us.
"Well, I still say you were lucky but not many first years could have taken on a full grown mountain troll. You all will win Gryffindor five points. Professor Dumbledore will be informed of this. You may go."
"Miss Malfoy, if I could have a second of your time." Snape drawled.
Both Harry and Ron gave me looks before rushing out of the bathroom. My god father had a severe look on his face as he whispered something to McGonagall and then led me out of the bathroom into the hall. Was he… limping?
"Your brother was the one your parents wanted me to watch over while here at Hogwarts but it seems like you're the one they should be worrying about." He said his dark eyes burrowing into my own. Snape looked angrier than I had seen him, his face pale- sweat starting to form on his forehead. I swallowed nervously. "What really happened in the chamber?"
"I- uh…" I looked away from Snape. If I told the truth, Hermione would get into trouble for lying… Merlin, what was I supposed to say? For once I was at a loss for words.
"What Hermione said." I, so eloquently, said.
Snape watched me for a moment, the frown on his face deepening. Seeing that I wasn't going to say anything, he let out a long, frustrated sigh.
"Fine. Go back to your tower. Don't take any detours and stay out of trouble."
Not waiting for me to say anything, Snape made his way back into the bathroom. My head tilted as I watched him go. Something was off but I couldn't put my finger on it. Shaking my confusion away I started to make my way to the Common Room, exhausted.
