Sweat clung to my body as I sat up with a gasp, stomach nauseous from the dreams I tried to fight away. Red blood splattering on checkered ground. Vines slithering, crawling up my leg, reaching for my neck. There were more but they were fading faster than I could remember.
The nightmares didn't come as often, but when they did, it was hard for me to go back to sleep. As excited as I was about going back to Hogwarts the next day, I would never forget the warm wet breath of the three headed dog nor the desperation I felt when trying to drag Ron's body to safety.
I shivered as the sweat started to cool and slipped out of my covers. Pulling on a robe, I flicked on the lanturn next to my bed, frowning when I saw it was nearly two in the morning. We would have to be up for the Hogwarts Express in just four hours. Groaning, I lifted my light up and poked my head out of my room.
The halls were dimly light, quiet except the faint snores from the portraits on the walls. I closed the door behind me as quietly as possible.
"Lyra?" Draco's groggy voice broke through the silence causing me to jump. He was leaning against his door frame, rubbing his eyes with one hand.
"Go back to sleep, I just had a nightmare that's all." I muttered, keeping my voice and the lantern low. He gave a nod and mumbled something uncomprehensible before going back to his own room.
I crept as quietly as I could down to the kitchen, a warm glass of tea would calm my frayed nerves. I was just hoping that one of the house elves were up to help out.
Inside the dimly lit kitchen was not one of the houselves. Instead it was my father, sitting at the island with a cup of tea and bottle of Firewhiskey in front of him. Instead of his usual robes, he was wearing a night shirt and pajama pants, his long blonde hair pulled back into a loose bun. The purple night shirt was short sleeved, revealing the angry raised scar on his left arm. The wound still looked fresh depsite the fact that it was years old.
My throat tightened at the sight.
I wasn't naieve enough to not know what it was. The Dark Mark.
I had seen pictures of the mark before. The dark skull with a snake wrapped around it. In all the pictures it was black, an inky stain on the arm. Not the red, mangled flesh that I was looking at now.
The Second Wizarding War was a very sensitive subject. Father and Mother tried their best to not talk about it, but Draco and I knew that Father had been on his side of the war. He had been cursed against his will and while Father had been cleared, he still had plenty of enemies despite our status.
Because of this, Father did his best to cover the mark. Of course we still got glimpses of it but I hadn't seen it so clearly in quite a while.
"What are you doing up?"
My eyes snapped up from Father's arm to his face. His steely grey eyes bore into my own. Dark circles bruised under his eyes. I took a step back nervously, the floor creaking loudly underneath me.
"I- I couldn't sleep." My voice was close to a whisper as I stood there, just waiting for him to throw me out.
Instead of demanding I go back to bed, he got to his feet, and pulled out his wand. With a flourish, the tea pot floated back over to the stove which clicked on. He waved his wand once more and a silk robe appeared on him, hiding the scar on his forearm from sight.
I shifted nervously as he pulled out the seat next to him.
"Don't let me stop you." Father sighed, gesturing for me to join him. I sat on the edge of the seat. Unsure.
Even though I was in Gryffindor, I knew Mother still loved me. Father was much harder to read. Especially after Christmas. We both had been keeping our distance which was for the better… but it still made my heart ache.
He took a sip of his tea, deep in thought. I glanced at his now covered arm with a frown.
"Does it still hurt?" The words slipped out before I could stop them. He stiffened at the question and took another long sip from the tea. I fully expected him to yell at me for asking, instead he gave a small shrug.
"Sometimes." He rubbed arm, wincing either at the phantom pain or the memory.
I bit the inside of my cheek, unsure as to what to say. The kettle whistled loudly causing me to jump and he summoned it closer to us. With a flick of his wand another tea cup appeared in front of us, the cup filling with the steaming brown liquid.
"Do you have nightmares about it?" I asked, my voice quiet.
He took a long drink from his own cup, and nodded. His eyes were slightly unfocused as he stared ahead.
"Almost every night."
I wanted to ask what about but I held my tongue. Now wasn't the time to push my luck. Instead I took a deep drink of the tea. Chamomile with a hint of lavender and honey spread across my tongue. Warmth spread through my insides.
"Is it-"
"A calming potion. It helps sooth my nerves on particularly bad nights." He poured himself another cup. "Only on bad nights though. Your mother doesn't approve of me… self medicating."
Humming, I took another deep drink, enjoying how it warmed me. I could see how it could be addictive.
The silence between us was deafening and my heart was sinking. Swirling the tea in my cup, I watched as the liquid threatened to spill over the edge.
"I never meant to disappoint you." I whispered, my voice low.
I glanced at my Father nervously, his eyes hadn't moved from the bottle of Firewhiskey. Embarrassment, shame was starting to spread through me as seconds ticked by.
"Despite your friends, your house, you've managed to maintain top marks," He finally said. "I wasn't sure what to expect when I heard you were sorted into Gryffindor but you've managed to hold your own. Like a true Malfoy."
I nodded, my heart soaring at his words. He glanced towards me and let out a small hum.
"Go to sleep, Lyra. You've got a long day of travel ahead of you."
"Are you sure you've got everything?" Mother asked, straightening the collar on Draco's shirt as we stood on the busy platform.
"We'll be fine, Mother." Draco sighed and I just nodded along, only half paying attention to them.
"Be sure to stay focused on your studying…" She rambled on as I scanned the crowd, attempting to spot a group of red haired wizards. Despite spotting several familiar faces, the Weasleys were nowhere in sight.
It was getting close to the train's departure. The crowd started to push forward, more and more students boarding the train. Mother grabbed me in a hug, squeezing me tight.
"Promise me you'll stick to your brother this year." She whispered in my ear and I pulled back from her, frowning.
I was about to argue when the train let out a loud whistle. It was almost time to go. I gave Mother a half smile, and her eyebrows furrowed.
"We better get going." I said, loud enough so that Draco could hear and he nodded, grabbing his trunk off of the ground. I grabbed mine as well, trying to ignore the guilt that was rising in my chest.
I knew that she had my best interests at heart… but even then I couldn't will myself to lie to her. The guilt grew stronger as I separated from Draco on the train. He didn't argue, but the look of disappointment in his eyes when I told him I was going to find the boys was evident.
Summer was finally over and I was finally free to do what I wanted, to be around who I wanted.
But why did it make me feel so terrible?
"Finally!"
It took me fifteen minutes to find one of our group. The train had departed and the halls were filled with students making my search for my friends harder than I had anticipated. Hermione looked up at me surprised as I stumbled into the compartment, hauling my trunk in behind me.
"It's an absolute mad house out there." I huffed, collapsing onto the seat across from Hermione who already had a book propped open.
"Are the boys not with you?" Hermione frowned and I frowned back at her.
"No, I figured they'd be with you." I shrugged and put my luggage on the top rack above our seats. "I'm sure they're fine. What are you reading?"
She held up her leather bound book and I wrinkled my nose at the gold script on it.
"Gadding with Ghouls?" I read out loud. "Haven't you read it already?"
I assumed Hermione had read all of our new school books before the term started. Hermione looked away guiltily and I narrowed my eyes, curious. Her face started to grow red under my scruitany.
"I have I just- he's so brave." Hermione sighed, almost dreamily. "Can you believe all the stuff he's done- and to take time out of his busy life to teach us?"
I tried to hide my surprise at her obvious crush. I hadn't expected her to like someone so… pretty.
"Did you read his feature in Witch Weekly?" I pulled the magazine out of my school bag and gave it to Hermione. "Apparently he was a Ravenclaw when he went to Hogwarts."
Hermione's eyes grew wide as she started to flip through the magazine. She continued to ramble. I leaned back in my seat, the rumbling from the train making my eyes grow heavy.
"Wake me up in ten minutes if the boys don't show up." I yawned. "We can go looking for them, later."
In hindsight, I should have been a little more concerned about finding the boys.
Apparently, they weren't able to get to Platform Nine and Three Quarters in time and for some reason thought it was a great idea to fly Mr Weasley's car to Hogwarts. Of course things didn't go smoothly and they were spotted by multiple muggles, crashed the car into the Whomping Willow, and snapped Ron's wand in the process.
Our first week back to Hogwarts was a disaster.
Ron's wand wouldn't stop malfunctioning despite the fact that we had taped it back together with Spellotape. The wand was so damaged it would puff smoke and even shot out of Ron's hand, giving Professor Flitwick a large green boil on his forehead. Lockhart was a disappointment. It became clear almost immediately that our new professor was too self obsessed to actually teach. Our first lesson he had given us a three page quiz full of questions like "What is Gilderoy Lockhart's favorite color? How does Gilderoy Lockhart spend his spare time?" Then, he released a hoard of Cornish Pixies on us before running away. The man seemed much more concerned about his image than actually teaching.
On top of all of that, Hermione was incredibly angry with the boys about their car journey to Hogwarts.
Things were… not looking good.
I was more than relieved by the time Saturday rolled around.
The four of us planned to spend the day at Hagrid's with a trip to the library in the afternoon. Quidditch practice put a damper on those plans.
"Great, the kid is here." I groaned as Hermione, Ron, and I found seats in the Quidditch stands.
Above us, towards the top of the stands sat Colin Creevey, his camera raised, clicking away. While the kid seemed harmless enough, the new Gryffindor first year idolized Harry and constantly stalked our group. None of the Gryffindor team were even on the field but the first year didn't seem to mind. The cool morning air nipped at us and I huddled into the other two for warmth.
"Be nice." Hermione chided, taking a bite of toast. "This is all new to him. I was like that once."
"What? Annoying?" Ron whispered to me and I covered my mouth to hide my laughter. Hermione narrowed her eyes at the two of us.
"What was that?"
Before either of us could come up with an excuse, the Gryffindor Quidditch team made their way onto the field, brooms in hand. I frowned at the group seeing that they were all still wearing their Quidditch gear.
"Aren't you finished yet?" Ron called and Harry looked over at us tiredly.
"Haven't started yet. Wood's been teaching us new moves."
I winced sympathetically at that. It was almost nine thirty and we had been hoping that they were done, if not close to done. Hermione sighed heavily next to me, and pulled out her Charms homework.
The Gryffindor team mounted their brooms, kicking off into the morning sky. While they started to circle around the field I stretched out on the bleachers, enjoying the sun. My moment of peace only lasted for a minute. Ron elbowed me roughly in the side causing me to jump. I was about to snap at him when I saw what had caught his attention.
Clad in green robes, the Slytherin team were starting to make their way onto the Quidditch field. Wood was red faced as he shot down towards the ground, landing in front of the Slytherin team.
They were too far away from us to hear but from the wild gestures Wood was making with his arms, it wasn't going to be pretty.
"We should probably go check this out." Hermione sighed.
Begrudenly, I followed her and Ron down onto the field, despite my instincts telling me otherwise. Nothing good was going to come out of this whether we got involved or not.
"Is that Malfoy?" Ron asked incrediously and I quickened my step to keep pace with the two. Scanning the crowd, I frowned catching a head of blond hair, inches shorter than the other Slytherin players.
Draco was wearing Slytherin Quidditch robes, broom stick in hand as he smirked at the Slytherin team. He hadn't mentioned anything about joining the team over the summer.
"What's happening?" Ron asked as we approached the group, joining Harry's side. 'Why aren't you playing? And what's he doing here?"
Draco's smirk grew.
"I'm the new Slytherin Seeker, Weasley. Everyone's just been admiring the brooms my father's bought for the team."
My frown deepened at that. The Nimbus Two Thousand and One had just been released. Draco had been begging Father one, but for Father to buy seven for the whole team?
"Good, aren't they?" Draco asked smoothly. "But perhaps the Gryffindor team will be able to raise some gold and get new brooms, too. You could raffle off those Cleansweep Fives; I expect a museum would bid for them."
The Slytherin team howled with laughter and the grin on Draco's face grew at their response.
"At least no one on the Gryffindor team had to buy their way in." Hermione said sharply next to me. I flinched at her words. "They got in on pure talent."
Draco's expression wavered and he glanced at the other Slytherins before his gaze grew steely.
"No one asked you your opinion, you filthy little mudblood."
It was worse than if Draco had outright cursed Hermione. Everyone surged around us. The Gryffindor's all started to scream in range, launching themselves at Draco. Flint, the Slytherin Captain dove in front of him just in time, wrangling back Fred and George. The blood drained from my face as I stared at my brother in shock. He knew how I felt about that word- about blood purity… And he was still using it.
"You'll pay for that one!" Ron yelled, red faced and pointed at Draco's pale face under one of Flint's arms.
A loud bang echoed across the stadium and instead of heading towards my brother, a bright green light hit Ron square in the stomach causing him to roll head over heels a few feet back.
"Ron! Ron! Are you all right?!" Hermione gasped and rushed over to Ron. The other Gryffindor's quickly followed.
I glanced at Draco who was being clapped on the back by the other Slytherin's who were clearly very proud by what had transpired. The smile on his face was uneasy as they praised him. Clearly he hadn't been expecting that extreme of a reaction.
I hadn't either.
Shaking my head, I joined the others who were standing around Ron. Immediately, I regretted that choice. The red head was belching loudly, large slimy slugs kept escaping his mouth. My stomach twisted at the sight.
"We'd better get him to Hagrid's, it's the nearest." Harry said and seeing my hesitation, he passed his broom to me so that he and Hermione could help Ron up.
"What happened Harry? Is he ill!" A small brown haired boy pushed his way towards us, his camera clutched between his hands. I wrinkled my nose as Colin Creeey tried to take a picture of the green faced red head.
"Get lost!" I snapped as Harry and Hermione pushed the boy out of the way.
The three of us stumbled to Hagrid's cablin, making a couple stops for Ron to belch up more slugs. We were almost there when the front door opened. Instead of Hagrid emerging, Gilderoy Lockhart came striding out.
"Quick, behind here!" Harry hissed and dragged Ron and Hermione behind a bush. I dove behind them, trying not to get too close to Ron.
"-It's a simple matter if you know what you're doing!" Lockhart said loudly over his shoulder. "If you need my help, you know where I am! I'll let you have a copy of my book. I'm surprised you haven't already got one- I'll sign one tonight and send it over. Well, goodbye!"
We waited until Lockhart was out of sight before pulling Ron out of the bush.
I rushed up to the large cabin door, knocking hard. It swung open revealing Hagrid. The corner of his lips immediately turned up seeing it was us.
"Bin wonderin' when you'd come tear see me- come in, come in- thought you mighta bin Professor Lockhart back again-"
The three of us tumbled into the cabin, Ron getting situated into a chair while Harry explained what happened. Hagrid didn't seem to have a problem, instead plopping a large copper basin in front of the belching boy.
"Better out than in," Hagrid said cheerfully and I gagged as Ron bent over the basin. "Get 'em all up, Ron."
"I don't think there's anything to do except wait for it to stop." Hermione said anxiously. "That's a difficult curse to work at the best of times, but with a broke wand-"
"What did Lockhart want with you, Hagrid?" Harry asked and Hagrid huffed loudly.
"Givin' me advice on gettin' kelpies out of a well. Like I don' know. An' banging on about some banshee he banished. If one word of it was true, I'll eat my kettle."
Hagrid wasn't one to criticize our teachers. Hermione immediately frowned at the caretaker.
"I think you're being a bit unfair. Professor Dumbledore obviously thought he was the best man for the job-"
"He was the on'y man for the job." Hagrid argued, setting a pot of tea and a plate of treacle toffee on the table. "An' I mean the on'y one. Gettin' very difficult ter find anyone fer the Dark Arts job. People aren't too keen ter take it on, see. They're startin' ter think it's jinxed. No one's lasted fer a while now. So tell me, who was he tryin' ter curse."
"Mal- Draco called Hermione something- it must have been really bad, because everyone went wild." Harry admitted and Ron's face darkened.
"It was bad. Malfoy called her a 'mudblood', Hagrid." Ron groaned and I winced as Hagrid let out an angry yell.
"He didn'!"
"He did," Hermione said. "But I don't know what it means. I could tell it was really rude, of course-"
"It's about the most insulting thing he could think of." Ron gave a small burp, a single slug fell out of his mouth into the basin. "Mudblood's a really foul name for someone who is Muggle-Born- you know, non-magic parents. There are some wizards- like Mal- well, they think they're better than everyone else because they're pureblood."
A pit was forming in my stomach as this conversation progressed. I wanted to defend Draco- tell them that he didn't mean it, that he didn't realize what the word really meant. Instead, I bit my tongue, guilt simmering inside. As much as I wanted to deny it, my brother knew exactly what it meant.
"I mean, the rest of us know it doesn't make any difference at all." Ron continued. "Look at Neville Longbottom- he's pureblood and he can hardly stand a cauldron the right way up."
I knew that Ron was trying to comfort Hermione but him talking down on Neville left a bad taste in my mouth. They made it seem so simple when they put it that way. But being a pureblood was so much more than that. There was the status, the responsibility, the expectations that came along with it. The whole conversation was making my head spin.
"An' they haven't invented a spell our Hermione can' do." Hagrid said proudly and Hermione's face went bright red.
"It's a disgusting thing to call someone." Ron spat. "Dirty blood, see. Common blood. It's ridiculous. Most wizards these days are half-blood anyways. If we hadn't married Muggles we'd've died out."
He retched again and ducked his head back into the cauldron.
A foot nudged against my own and I looked up to see Harry looking at me, eyebrows furrowed. I gave him a tight smile, trying to show that I was alright. He didn't look very convinced but didn't say anything. Hagrid changed the subject and I buried my feelings.
They weren't worth fighting over
