Reflections

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Garrus turned to his closet to select a fresh pair of fatigues. A content rumbling emitted from deep within him. The vocem laetitiae, as turians called it, or simply vo-la. It was a sign that everything was well, very well.

An optimal balance of mental and physical well-being, the vo-la could be heard when a turian became a parent, when major success was achieved, when a parent was proud of their child, when two turians bonded . . . or just by simply being with your mate.

And right now, Garrus could hardly be happier. Yesterday he would have been happy just to find Dani alive. Okay, maybe that was a lie but after so much time, he'd held little hope that they could just pick up where they left off.

Two and a half years was a long time and even though the time he had spent with her had been more than enough to form a permanent attachment, he couldn't say if the same was true for her. So, yesterday he had decided he would take things one step at a time.

If they found out she'd died, he could properly mourn her. If they found her alive, well . . . then he could take the second step. She'd either moved on with her life, maybe even with someone else and she'd want to stay on Earth. He could then at least say goodbye and properly mourn his loss.

Or, she would agree to go with them and he could take the third step. Either too much time had passed and those fragile tendrils of tender feelings had withered or there were still some remnants left and he could work to strengthen that bond between them again.

But all his plans amounted to nothing when reality turned out to be so much more than he could have hoped for. Not only had she missed him as much as he had her, but their time apart had revealed to her the truth in her own heart. When he pulled her out of that doomed underground facility, she had clung to him even before she knew it was him.

It had given him hope that not all was lost. But during their encounter with Torque and Wright, he wasn't entirely sure of her feelings. Not even during those first moments alone in her room and not even when he held her in his arms so she could cry. It wasn't until she pleaded him to not leave her alone that he allowed himself to wonder.

And then he found out, from her own lips, that all this time he had been as firmly rooted in her heart as she had been in his. He'd thanked every deity worshipped out there for bringing her back to him.

And then this morning! He smirked at the memory and his vo-la became a little more pronounced. The mere memory of that soft malleable flesh in his hands, so fragile with her life veins so closely beneath a thin layer of skin, it still held the power to bring his blood to a boil.

The feel of her skin, her little moans and cries of pleasure, that soft and moist heat that was her female core, the knowledge no man had ever brought her to these heights, that no man ever got to explore her body like that and never would . . . And Spirits, that taste of her!

He had never understood the fascination that males of other races sometimes had for human females. He had heard them talk during his days with C-Sec, he had seen the pictures and he had even seen some nasty vids. They had never elicited any kind of reaction from him. Except a feeling of disdain.

Garrus glanced at the rumpled sheets on his bed where, just moments ago, he had emptied himself deep within her. Dani, he realized, she was his . . . ver de desiderium, how did humans call it again? Ah yes, aphrodisiac.

Even back then, when the possibility of them eventually getting together was just that, a possibility, when he did a bit of secret research after human mating customs, the vids and pictures merely managed to make him feel uneasy. Yet he studied everything he could get his hands on. If they did end up together, he didn't want to look a fool, he wanted to be able to pleasure her.

He remembered how the task had seemed quite daunting with human erogenous zones being so different from turian ones. Some even quite tricky to reach! That early research had come in handy though when, long ago, she had gingerly placed her lips against his mouth plates and he had shamelessly taken advantage of the situation.

It had been a risk. Even after seeing vids about the custom of kissing, he had understood the idea but their mouths were not exactly . . . compatible. That first kiss should have been awkward as hell. Turned out, it was anything but. Okay, maybe just a little. Garrus flared his mandibles in a smirk at the memory.

His mind drifted back to this early morning when things had just - kind of fallen together. Okay, that he had hurt her so much was very unfortunate, also very unexpected. Dammit, he had really cut some big corners in his research! He should have handled that first time differently, but then, how was he supposed to know it was not just their first time, but her first time as well? Period! Plus, in the end he was able to make her climax even with the discomfort, had he not?

And their coupling after that had been a lot better. Those cries upon his entering her in the shower, those had most definitely not been cries of pain, but intense pleasure!Spirits, just the memory made him want her all over again. He shook his head in dismay. He was in big trouble! He should probably research human stamina.

Though the prospect of joining Dani in the shower again was very, very appealing, he knew that this time it would be hours and hours of passionate lovemaking before he would finally be able to empty himself deep inside her again. To him, that thought already had his inner plates shifting and responding but he really didn't want to scare her off. Maybe he should just ask her about it himself instead of doing some underhanded research.

They could just talk about it; he could tell her about turian stamina, she could tell him if that coincided with human stamina or not and if it didn't, well that was too bad for him then. He would make it very clear that she should never feel guilty about it or worse, feel forced to keep up with him.

With a last wistful look in the direction of the shower Garrus dumped his fresh fatigues on his bed. He picked his feet protectors from the small pile first, he barely had them on when he heard footsteps approaching. They stopped outside his door.

"Vakarian? I've brought the clothes you requested for Pryde. Considerate of you to let her use your shower. Though I still feel you should have asked for permission first before you went ahead to have it installed . . ."

Garrus padded to the door and activated the control panel. The door swished open and he looked down at Miranda Lawson's lithe form. The moment her eyes landed on his bare chest and then traveled down to rest on the small towel wrapped around his waist, her mouth formed a big O.

He couldn't help himself, his mandibles flared into what he could only assume was a devious smirk. It was all he could do to keep himself from guffawing at her shocked expression.

"Do you always start your conversations in front of a closed door?" he asked teasing.

"Don't start Vakarian. I know turians have excellent hearing. So, had a pleasant shower?"

"Very." He smirked.

"There were rumors about you two. Never thought they were actually true for once," she stated point blank. "Where is Pryde?"

"Dani is still having a shower. Or again," he took a step closer to Miranda, completely comfortable with the fact he was nearly buck naked in front of her. He had to give her credit for not flinching or stepping back.

"Got a problem with the rumors being true?" he asked her with just a hint of menace exuded by his sub-vocals.

"No, your personal affairs don't concern me," she stated with near disinterest. "As long as you don't let them interfere with our mission, you can do as you very well please."

Garrus considered the woman in front of him. He knew every part of her was designed and engineered to be superior, even her looks. She had half the male crew drooling and lusting after her athletic body. Since he still didn't consider himself a human fetishist and she wasn't the object of his affections, he couldn't care less about how others perceived her perfectly engineered body, she was nothing to him. To him, she was just another human female and an icy cold one to boot. All manners and all business right until she unleashed her deadly force on you.

All he wanted to know was how much of a threat she could and would pose for Dani. He hadn't forgotten Ashley's immediate dislike for her. In the end, that nearly cost him everything.

This woman was cold, but she was cold to everyone, not just Dani. Still, he hated how he couldn't get a read on her. An arrogant smile turned up her lips.

"You're afraid I'm going to betray her," she stated. "Yes, that's right. I know all about Gunnery Chief Ashley Williams. Dani Pryde was not in the case dossiers provided by the Illusive Man. Of course I was going to do a back ground check when I learned the new Normandy would get an unexpected additional crew member."

"If you or the Illusive Man have plans like Bellerophon for Dani, I will kill you and anyone else involved," he warned her. "I will never allow anyone to take her from me again."

"I'll let that comment slide, for the moment, but . . . Bellerophon?" Miranda asked with genuine surprise. "What did they want with her?"

"The same thing you and the Illusive Man might want now you've done your little back ground check. Her potential, it must be very appealing to have full control over that."

"Ah, her potential. Yes. You can relax Vakarian. I've already contacted the Illusive Man about her and we agreed that the best way to employ that potential is through her own voluntary cooperation. But, thank you for supplying me with the name of the corporation behind her abduction."

Garrus regarded her with thinly veiled suspicion. Miranda just walked past him, carrying a wrapped bundle in her arms. She dumped it next to his clothes on his bed.

"The information about that period is sparse, to say the least," she continued. "Most evidence was destroyed, certainly the identity of the persons behind the operation. Now that I know in which direction to look, I promise we'll keep a close tab on any Bellerophon activities. This won't happen again, I assure you."

"See to it that it doesn't and we won't have a problem," he said.

"Garrus, have you . . . oh!" Dani appeared, toweled off and wrapped in a soft bath sheet. Her eyes flashed from his still undressed state to Miranda standing casually in his room. She blushed profusely and he thought she looked ridiculously adorable in this state. Yep, he was in big trouble.

"Dani, sweetie," he said as if neither of them were merely wrapped in a flimsy cloth. "This is Miranda Lawson. She agreed to donate some of her clothes until you get the chance to procure your own wardrobe again. Also the donater of the toiletries you just used.

"Miranda, this is Dani Pryde, most important thing anyone needs to know about her is . . . she's my girlfriend. So, now we've got the threats and pleasantries out of the way, is there anything else you'd like to know?"

Garrus casually went to stand next to Dani and placed his bare hand on her shoulder. He flexed his fingers, showing off the sharp quality of his talons. Miranda ignored his display and took a closer step at Dani.

"I can see my clothes will fit you splendidly, just like Vakarian surmised. You're a bit . . . smaller in certain places, a tad . . . softer in other places, but you should have no trouble fitting in my suit. So, you're the genius," she muttered, taking in Dani's appearance. "You're not what I expected."

Garrus noticed the guarded look that crept in Dani's eyes and her facial muscles that froze into that bland expression. It was the look that betrayed absolutely nothing, the ultimate poker face.

"Sorry to disappoint," Dani replied, her voice that same level quality.

"Oh, you don't. Well, not yet anyway" Miranda stated calmly while scrutinizing Dani's every detail.

"It's amazing. I've read reports about you. And you – forgive my bluntness, you're as – as . . . alien . . . as they say. But this is just the front, yeah? It's not your real look. Completely unreadable among strangers, but among those you trust . . . an open book."

Miranda slowly circled Dani, taking her in as she went. Garrus didn't like the way her eyes lighted in excitement, like she had just discovered some new alien form of life.

"You can solve mathematic problems in a heartbeat but if I were to say to you . . . The lights are on but nobody's home . . . Would you take that as a compliment or an insult?"

"Miranda!" Garrus warned her. She held up her hand in defense.

"Not trying to ridicule her, just verifying the records."

"Screw the records! You're not -"

"I don't know what that means," Dani interjected calmly. "I don't do expressions, I don't understand them, they hold no meaning to me. Unless I hear them frequently and someone explains. It was . . . one of the reasons I had – still have – difficulties connecting with other humans. We just, communicate on different levels."

Her voice was still emotionless, her face still a mask but the stiff muscles beneath his fingers betrayed how uncomfortable she felt. He tried to comfort her with a gentle squeeze.

"You're very honest about this," Miranda went on with analyzing Dani. "This must be uncomfortable for you, yet you show no outward signs of distress. If Vakarian here hadn't just squeezed you for support, I never would have known."

"It is uncomfortable yes," Dani admitted softly. "People are often . . . quick to judge. Most of the time they find me lacking in some way or other. It's . . . unpleasant."

"That, right there . . ." Miranda pointed to her eyes. "Your eyes . . . something happened. First sign of distress I've seen from you. But, they are not natural. They are cybernetic implants, yes?"

"Yes."

"And in your ears as well, right? I hacked into the files of Torque Enterprises. During your imprisonment your stapes were removed. Dr. Torque restored your hearing with implants that kind of take over the entire workings of the human ear. That's pretty damn impressive."

"I owe them a lot."

"Were there more enhancements?" Miranda asked, ignoring Dani's statement. "The file I got wasn't . . . complete."

"The tibia and fibula in both of my legs were shattered – unsalvable – they were replaced with titanium substitutes and I got titanium grafts on both femurs. It's not a perfect solution but at least I'm walking again."

"Cold facts suit you better in conversation. I assume it's an area of comfort. So how does this work? The moment I leave. you turn back to your normal self or does it take time to adjust to the individuals around you?"

Garrus really wanted to wrap his arms around Dani, pull her against him. Just to comfort her, be close to her. He knew her well enough not to try such a thing at this moment.

"It depends on the situation," Garrus answered for her. "Now back off Miranda."

"Yes, of course," she agreed. "She's not prone to hysterics so I daresay we will get along just fine. So, you and Dani . . . How does that even work?"

"It works, Miranda," Garrus snarled. "That's all you need to know."

Miranda smirked at Dani. "Oh, he's protective of you, isn't he? Well, I'll leave you to it then. See you around, Pryde. Vakarian."

Miranda nodded coolly at them before she turned around and left the room.

"Is she nosy or what?" a husky female voice suddenly asked.

The empty air sparked and crackled to life and suddenly a hooded woman was standing in front of them.

"Waaah!" Dani yelped in surprise and nearly dropped her towel in shock.

"I'd hold on to that if I were you," the woman said with a smirk. "Wouldn't want things to become awkward."

"Become awkward?" Garrus bristled. "They already are. Not cool, Kasumi!"

"Relax, Scales. Don't pop a vein. I just snuck in with Miri. You gonna introduce me or will you let me do all the work?"

"I don't like being spied upon . . . " Dani trailed off, she'd probably already forgotten the name.

"Kasumi Goto, at your service. Best thief in the business," Kasumi said with a flourish.

"That's not something to gloat about. Besides, I've never heard of you, how good can you be?" Dani retorted.

"Ah, I said best thief in the business, not the most famous. Need to watch my step to keep it that way. If I was famous, I didn't do my job right."

"What do you want?" Garrus asked a bit terse. The little thief was skilled enough but he still didn't trust her. Right after they had picked her up from the Citadel, she had coerced Shepard in taking a little detour to Bekenstein in the Boltzmann system of the Serpent Nebula cluster. Just to pick up a little something. That turned out stealing some memory box from right under the nose of some rich scumbag. Guns blazing, grenades exploding kind of stuff. She'd held her own and if one were to believe Shepard, she'd managed to take out the shields of a gunship on her own.

Still, she was the reason they returned much later to Earth than planned. If that little stint at Bekenstein had taken just a moment longer, he'd have been too late to save Dani. And he would have always held that against her.

"People are talking out there," Kasumi replied. "And I hear it all! When I heard the scuttlebutt about your – little adventure. I got curious. So here I am. You're not what I expected though. Whether that's good or bad, I'm still deciding."

"So, you are one of the new recruitments?" Dani asked.

"In a way. I've got my own reasons for being here," Kasumi replied easily. Garrus noticed Dani relax a bit. Kasumi was a cheeky number, but he had to admit, she was easier to talk to, more accessible then Miranda Lawson.

"Don't you have somewhere else to be, Vakarian? I need to help your girlfriend get herself presentable. Oh don't look so shocked! I've seen enough to know she's not leaving this room without my golden touch. So, shoo!"

"Can I at least get dressed?" he asked dryly.

"Only if you hurry," Kasumi smiled. "I'm not pulling any punches."

She walked over to the bed picked up his fatigues and flung them in his face. Infuriating woman! Dani took a curious step closer when Kasumi opened up the bundle she had placed on the bed.

"I know what's in here," Kasumi said with glee. "I've seen it all!"

Garrus shot up his head hearing the saucy quality Kasumi's voice suddenly possessed while pulling on his tight fitting trousers. He nearly tripped over his own feet seeing what Kasumi was holding up. Something dangled from her fingers, something that he just barely recognized as the kind of underwear Dani had hidden beneath her clothes. It was just . . . so flimsy and lacy and it had little strings at the sides.

The unbidden though of Dani sprawled on his bed wearing just that caused his mandibles to twitch and he suddenly decided that being anywhere else was better than staying right here. He flung his tunic over his head, grabbed his boots and excused himself in a hurry, ignoring the suspicious muffled sounds coming from Kasumi.