It was determined that the retrieved Companions would be given opportunity to gain entrance to the Hall of Valor, but only after they had been cleansed of their beast blood. They were each cleansed in turn, and as each one had their wolf spirit removed, all took part in helping to slay it. There were emotions of joy, sorrow, and everything in between. Then it was Ylwa's turn. The beast left her. Everyone helped her to slay it. Afterwards, she felt… empty. Part of her was gone. She also felt so very alone, even amongst this crowd of people who had been like a family to her for most of her afterlife. She could no longer smell what they were feeling. It was unsettling.
After the cleansing, the newly-arrived Companions were given the opportunity, one by one, to prove their worth and enter Sovngarde proper. Ylwa sought out Jergen. She wanted to… what did she want to do to him now? Just a little bit ago, she wanted to rip him to tiny shreds and send him back to the Hunting Grounds, trapped in an afterlife he didn't want, without a way out. But she found that her ferocity had placated a bit. She was still angry, but it felt like a more pure anger - like it was her anger and no longer someone else's violent desires she was experiencing. She did want to confront him before moving on to whatever waited for them.
She sniffed the air before remembering that her sense of smell was now nearly gone. She would have to look at faces. She began searching the crowd for him. Eventually, she located him, chatting jovially with someone else. When he saw her approaching, he quickly cut off his conversation and stepped towards Ylwa. "I know that look," he said. "What have I done?"
"You left them!" she seethed. "You left our young sons to go and get yourself killed in a war! And you never even told them about me?!"
Ylwa expected resistance. Jergen put up at least a bit of a fight on most things. But this time, he just sighed, and said, "You are right about both of those things."
Ylwa punched him and said, "How DARE you?! They lost me, so you take them away from their loving family, just to ABANDON them a few years later! ABANDON them and then die, leaving them orphans! What kind of a heartless idiot would do such a thing?!" Ylwa had been prepared to go on, but a wave of sorrow doused the flames of anger. "You didn't even tell them that they had a mother who loved them and would have done anything for them. You left them alone in the world, thinking that they'd never had anyone who loved them enough to stay."
"I was wrong," Jergen said. "I should have stayed. And I should have told them that they had a mother who loved and cared for them. But I couldn't tell them about what you were."
With that, the anger returned. "What we BOTH were, you mean? How were you any better? Just because you regretted your gift and kept it a secret?"
"They couldn't find out," Jergen responded.
"You are a worthless piece of trash!" Ylwa declared, and punched him again.
"I have made many mistakes," he said, not defending himself from either her verbal blows or her physical ones.
"All that time together in the Hunting Grounds, and you allowed me to believe you really did your best!" She punched him again.
"I was wrong," he said.
"When were you going to tell me all of this?" she sneered. "If I hadn't found out on my own, would you ever have told me?"
"Probably not," he admitted.
Ylwa glared at him once more and stormed off. She noticed that Vilkas had been watching from a distance as she took her rage out on Jergen, and he seemed amused? pleased? entertained? She should have been able to read his looks like she could when he was younger. She went off on her own, not caring at that moment if she got lost or never made it into the Hall of Valor.
