In this chapter, Jar Jar Binks is going to be introduced to King Kong. And yes, it's not going to end well for him. But then again, when does Jar Jar Binks NOT die in this fanfic? You should know the formula by now, unless you haven't read the first one.
I got suggestions for this one though I'm not sure whether they were from the same person or not. Either way, this sounds like a good idea to me.
Chapter 2: King Kong
Outside the window, Anakin could tell something was wrong.
Apparently, King Kong was on a destructive rampage throughout New York City.
It was broad daylight, so the gorilla was clearly visible.
As he roared, he broke glass windows.
It was on the headlines of the newspaper. The New York Times wondered if the world had gone bananas.
Anakin wondered if it would be Godzilla next. In the past his friends had encountered Freddy Krueger, Jason Voorhees, Xenomorphs, and the Devil himself, so anything seemed possible at that point.
Perhaps they would list that death underneath radiation poisoning. But perhaps that wasn't gruesome enough.
They decided to go to the city to investigate.
Sure enough, people were screaming and running as far away from King Kong as humanly possible.
"Well, thank God we're not being attacked by a giant chimpanzee." remarked one of the civilians.
King Kong was beating his chest and throwing cars everywhere.
Where was the military when people needed them?
Jar Jar Binks looked at King Kong in astonishment.
"That una big ape!" exclaimed Jar Jar Binks.
"I'll say." nodded Obi-Wan Kenobi.
Did some gorilla eat a radioactive banana or something?
"You sure we should be here?" asked Padme.
The longer they stayed in the city, the more unsafe it seemed.
King Kong didn't seem to notice their presence, but still.
"If anything happens, we can always resurrect ourselves." noted Anakin.
"True..." answered Anakin's girlfriend.
"I have to question how such an ape grew to such a massive size..." pondered C-3PO.
"He better not take my clothes off." remarked Padme.
Suddenly, Anakin Skywalker had an idea.
"Why don't you dress like a banana?" asked Anakin.
"Why not?" asked Jar Jar Binks.
Jar Jar Binks did just that, completely ignoring there was an ape terrorizing the city.
He also got some maracas for some strange reason.
"Is it PBJ time?" asked Jar Jar.
"Sure, whatever." answered Anakin Skywalker. The sooner he got King Kong's attention, the better.
"What does being a banana have to do with peanut butter and jelly?" inquired Obi Wan.
Jar Jar Binks shrugged and began to dance.
"It's peanut buttah jelly timen! Peanut buttah jelly timen!" sang Jar Jar Binks.
Inevitably, King Kong mistook Jar Jar Binks for a sweet, juicy banana.
The giant gorilla licked his lips.
He grabbed him and began to munch on him.
Jar Jar Binks screamed.
As King Kong feasted on Jar Jar's flesh, blood began to drip out of his mouth.
Though he didn't taste like a banana like he assumed he would, he still tasted delicious.
Anakin Skywalker and his friends began to laugh.
"Why is he going on a rampage anyway?" asked Padme. Did someone swipe his banana smoothie from his hand?
"Maybe people built this city right over his jungle." noted Obi-Wan Kenobi.
"Not a smart idea." noted Qui-Gon Jinn.
Anakin wondered that himself...though he didn't ponder it too much. This had given them the opportunity to kill Jar Jar Binks once again.
Suddenly, a small monkey approached him.
His name was Curious George.
Apparently he had been curious and had gotten himself separated from his father.
You couldn't expect anything else from a monkey known as Curious George.
But if he didn't have a tail, why did people refer to him as a monkey?
It was weird.
Perhaps the Man in the Yellow Hat didn't know the difference between monkeys and apes...not that he was a dummy like Jar Jar Binks was.
King Kong picked him up...
...and they left to head back to the jungle.
"Well, that was weird." noted Anakin. The rampage had ended just as suddenly as it had begun.
"But at least we won't have to worry about him destroying the city." remarked C-3PO. He actually liked it there.
R2D2 beeped in agreement.
Perhaps the citizens of New York could rest easy now that they didn't have to worry about ridiculously large gorillas.
They all went back home afterwards...
...but not before they resurrected Jar Jar Binks. Who knew when a monster would attack the city again?
I figured this would be a good way to kill Jar Jar Binks so I included King Kong. And of course, I also threw in a twist ending.
