A/N: So, I have come a decision. Starting next week, I am moving the update day for this story to Tuesdays. The reason being is that every time there is an issue, it is always here on ff.n and it is always on the weekends. I updated last week and both times I received a review, it took 2-3 business days before the review number that showed evened out to reflect the new review consistently. PLUS, from one of them it seems like the whole chapter didn't show for everyone readily or consistently for a few days. I think it evened out by Tuesday, when Cairistona and I were investigating on our work computers, where we weren't logged in. Hence why I am choosing Tuesday as the new update day. So starting, not this coming Tuesday, but the next one, that's when you should look for the updates here from now on.
I will still updating on Saturdays over on Ao3, however, just to keep me doing all the stuff on the same schedule. I have a routine that works and I'm afraid changing everything about it might gum up the works. So if you want to keep reading on the same schedule, go to Archive of Our Own and search New Life, New Battles by TaiFan23, as that is my handle over there. It's literally the first result if you search by the title of the story. Apparently I'm the first person over there to use this precise title. :D
Review Replies:
arisu freedomstrikes: I'm just gonna start replying with "..." to these scams from now on until someone proves to me you've actually read the entire thing. I don't get paid for this. What makes you people think any of us would pay you when you come begging? Customers go to the business, not the other way around. The only exception are vets or groomers or some such making a house call, but that's still initiated by the customer/patient.
GRNauman: I messaged you, but since you never replied, I have no way of knowing if ff.n allowed the message to go through. This site and all it's bugs. I will put the recommendations here, for anyone else interested, and will also say to refer to my author's note above. The site seemed to have glitched out last week. I did post the second part last week, though I didn't do the whole Part 1/part 2 thing...maybe that through you off, but since you reviewed the previous week's chapter, I didn't think that was it. I hope this week it works better and you can see both last week's and this week's now?
Anyways, fic recommendations I gave GRNauman and now I give you all are: Fate Calls by Sci-FiFan95 and works by Cairistona as well. Cairistona's stories start with You Have Found a Home, followed by My Family, My Home and then This Love Will Carry You, but her other works are also great, those are just the main stories that follow her characters. Also, if you have interest in NCIS, you should also read Sci-FiFan95's NCIS story, it's also really good.
Anyways, here's to hoping ff.n let's this show up properly this week! Enjoy!
Chapter 37: After Effects
"Where is Knock Out?!" Megatron demanded angrily as he stood in the empty medbay.
Soundwave looked up from where he was tending to a wounded Barricade's arm in the medic's absence. "Medic and partner: Missing since Airachnid's coup attempt."
"Is that so?" Megatron asked.
"Tch," Barricade scoffed. "I set him to guard the store rooms during the madness."
"Weren't Insecticons reported to have been seen on that level?" Starscream asked, walking over, holding his arm lightly where it was in a sling—it'd been nearly ripped off by one of the Insecticons. "I highly doubt Knock Out could've stood much of a chance against those beasts."
"And what of Breakdown?" Megatron asked.
"Unknown," Soundwave replied. "Soundwave: Busy with repairs since coup. Drones: Searching ship for clues."
Megatron sneered and turned as a Vehicon entered medbay and then paused as it noticed the Warlord had arrived.
"Sir!" The Vehicon saluted. "It appears Medic Knock Out and his partner Breakdown have departed the Nemesis. As well, a number of items have gone missing from the primary storage room located in proximity to your quarters, sir!"
Megatron raised an optic ridge, a snarl on his lips. "Several items?" He asked. "Tell me, soldier, is the Forge of Solus Prime among those items?"
"Yes sir," the Vehicon replied.
Megatron's snarl deepened and he growled angrily. The Forge wouldn't just disappear and there was only one reason Knock Out would have for taking it. After all, he wouldn't be able to use it as anything but a glorified hammer. He turned his attention toward Barricade and took a step toward the enforcer.
"Mind explaining to me why you let that traitor out of your sight in such proximity to the relic?" Megatron demanded.
"I didn't think Knock Out was a traitor, sir," Barricade replied honestly. "We are the whole reason he can even practice as a medic, Lord Megatron. I didn't believe he would give that up simply over a small disagreement. I see now that I was mistaken to believe as such. Even after he seemingly came to my aid with that bug."
"Hmm," Megatron hummed at that. He could see how Barricade could be fooled by the wayward doctor. Especially if the medic had rescued him from one of those Insecticon warriors. "Very well, I can see he fooled many among us. And for that, he will pay dearly."
"Certainly the DJD have already added him to their list by now," Starscream said, picking at some dried life-en on his shoulder. "They have a way of…knowing the very moment someone turns, don't they?"
"Indeed, Starscream," Megatron said silkily. "Indeed." He wasn't going to tell the SIC whether that was accurate or not. After all, that little belief of his troops served him well to keep discontents in line. But it did remind him he needed to send a message to Tarn soon. Along with a few other mechs.
After all, they were in need of a new medic now. Soundwave could serve as a substitute in the meantime, but he had other duties he needed to attend to.
"So," I said as I sat on the bench at the table in the courtyard, backwards where I leaned slightly against the table and faced where Shadowstreaker was leaning against the support pillar of the gazebo. "You're my cousin?"
"Yup," Shadowstreaker replied, arms crossed as he stood there casually.
I shared a look with Sideswipe and Sunstreaker, the latter of which looked skeptical as hell.
"And your parents are Megatronus and Solus Prime?" Sideswipe clarified.
"Also yup," Shadowstreaker said, looking more amused than annoyed as one might expect someone to be when their words are questioned so frequently.
"Do we have any normal family members?" I wondered absently, looking around.
"If you count human family members," Shadowstreaker said.
"I mean, do human family members count as normal family members when you are Cybertronian?" I asked drily.
Shadowstreaker chuckled lightly. "If the only criteria is that they aren't members of the Thirteen Original Primes, then yes," he said. "Though your mother wasn't one of them."
I shrugged slightly. "Yes, but according to Solarcharge, she was Supreme Commander of all Seekers in her time," I replied. "Before she…disappeared in order to escape my father. So I dunno if I would qualify that as normal."
"Hm, well, that is true from what I was told," Shadowstreaker said.
"Is it sad that I believe the words of Megatronus more than the words of my own brother?" I asked drily.
"Not at all," Shadowstreaker said. "Your brother is a lying, manipulative afthole. Megatronus is a good guy who has an unfortunate reputation from being controlled by a mad, dark god."
Sunstreaker snorted. "So says you," he said. "And how are we supposed to believe The Fallen is really some great mech? If he's so great, how come he's left the world to ruin all this time?"
"Forced retirement," Shadowstreaker said. "He's confined to the little Pocket Dimension Vector put him in after their argument. Vector's idea of protecting the multiverse from one influenced by the dark god. He fails to see his brother anymore, just The Fallen. Like anyone who knows the story."
"That's rich, coming from him," I said with a scoff. "As if Vector's a saint."
"You and I both know Vector's an arrogant afthole, but the greater Cybertronian community still views him as a hero," Shadowstreaker pointed out. "Who protects the whole multiverse with benevolence and wisdom."
Sunstreaker scoffed again. "Yeah right," he said. "If he was so wise, he would've found other ways to handle…whatever it was he handled the way he did by abandoning his sparkling."
"On that, we can all agree," Shadowstreaker said.
"Do…do you know why he sent us away?" I asked Shadowstreaker, tilting my helm with a frown.
Shadowstreaker paused, seeming to consider how to answer for a moment. "To hear my father explain it, it was because 'the fragger couldn't see past his own hubris to consider how it might make those he cares about feel or how it might affect anyone down the line.'" He quoted.
Sunstreaker snorted and so did I at that. Sideswipe even scoffed a little, looking a little amused at the old Prime's assessment of the event.
"From my understanding, at the time Liege Maximo had betrayed them," Shadowstreaker continued on, seeing how we'd all at least found some amusement from the way his father had talked about it. "After an attack that had left one of their friend's sparkling dead, Vector decided to take drastic measures to protect you and I. And nothing Megatronus, Solus or any of the others said could sway his mind. He stole me from my parents one night and sent us away while they slept."
"So he kidnapped you," I said in conclusion. "Much like he did me from my human reality. Except you were a helpless sparkling, reliant on the adults in your life to keep you safe. Which was supposed to include him."
"I'm sorry to hear that's how you returned to Cybertronianhood," Shadowstreaker said, bowing his helm. "I was returned, because otherwise I would have died in the car crash I was in. My mother was able to intervene."
"Vector manufactured a dangerous situation in my case," I said, crossing my arms and leaned back. "And then snatched me from it, despite the fact I was about to escape it. And then dropped me into Shockwave's servos."
"Ah," Shadowstreaker said, as if that explained something he'd been told or asked. "So he manipulated a situation in which he could plausibly claim to be 'rescuing you'."
"Twice," Sideswipe said. He looked to me. "Didn't he initially play it off like he was rescuing you from Shockwave?"
I nodded. "He had Shockwave dull my memory so I would believe Shockwave was the one to snag me to begin with," I said. "And when he retrieved me from him, when he felt it was time, he acted like he was doing this heroic act rescuing me from his clutches. When the whole time he was the whole reason I was there to begin with. So he could claim he was rescuing me from the fire, and he could claim he was rescuing me from Shockwave, depending on how a conversation might go. Covered his aft on two fronts, if one didn't see through both things."
Shadowstreaker let out a long gust of air. "Yeah, I can see why my parents are so pissed off at him in that case. Besides the forced retirement thing and stealing me from them."
"They can't leave that pocket dimension at all?" I asked, frowning.
Shadowstreaker shook his helm. "They tried to slip out through Solarcharge's portal one of the times he checked in to check my progress with the Shard. It….didn't go well. I'm not sure how it works, but they're stuck. I suspect as long as Vector is alive, they will be stuck there."
I frowned, wings shifting uncertainly. "Well," I said, tone indignant. "That's rude. Just because they didn't agree with abandoning sparklings?"
"That's the excuse Vector gave, anyways," Shadowstreaker said. "Though Megatronus suspects Vector never really got over his stent of being controlled by Unicron and then with Liege Maximo betraying them, he became even more paranoid and controlling."
I huffed slightly. "Seriously," I said. "How many reasons can I be given to dislike my father?"
"At least you're getting some answers now," Sideswipe offered a positive view. "I remember when you thought you'd never get any of those." He reached out and laid a hand on my shoulder from his spot sitting on the table next to me.
"And now I'm piecing everything together piece by piece," I said with a sigh. "And the picture just never looks pretty." I made a face.
"Hold up," Sunstreaker said, holding a hand up. "If your parents can't leave their little pocket dimension, how'd they save you from the car crash?"
"Vector transported me to them as a 'favor'," Shadowstreaker replied. "He'd taken me from them to protect me from perishing. So if I died in the reality he'd hidden me in, it would null and void that reason. He was covering his aft more than he was actually acting out of real desire to protect me or anything. At least, that's how we feel about it."
"I can see that," I said. "Like how he fabricated a fire and a body in my human reality to cover up taking me away from it." I crossed my arms and tilted my helm.
"So you really weren't even dying when you were taken?" Shadowstreaker asked with a frown.
"Nope," I said, pulling my pedes up to cross my legs as well. "I was alive and well. About to get married even. I was happy. Building a life. After decades of struggle. I was finally somewhere I had believed I belonged. Given the choice, at that point in time, I would've stayed. At an earlier time in my life, I would've chosen this in a sparkbeat, because this is better than places I have been and I knew it would be. But of course he waits until I am happy. Until I wouldn't want to leave, to take me. Let me see happiness and a future and feel like I mattered to people, just to take that away." I sighed heavily and there was a moment of silence. "And now I have that again here…I cannot help but fear he will do the same all over again. Solarcharge already tried."
"Hey," Sideswipe said gently, sliding down to sit next to me. "Don't worry. We won't let him do that." He wrapped an arm around me, placing his hand on my shoulder opposite him. "Just like we stopped Solarcharge. As long as you wanna stay an Autobot, we will fight for you, too. It's your right to choose. That choice should've never been taken from you."
"Yeah," Sunstreaker said, moving to sit on my other side. "Screw anyone who says otherwise."
"Yeah," I agreed. "And I can fight him myself this time." My wings twitched before I settled them lightly behind both twins. Not quite touching either of them. "If he does cause trouble. Though I do hope he stays out of it. Once upon a time, I might've been open to him showing up if he showed signs of being better, but…I don't think I'm in a mindset for that right now. If he's better, he can be better at a distance."
"I don't blame you for that," Shadowstreaker said from his spot.
I huffed slightly. Then I leaned slightly back again, having leaned forward over the course of the conversation, closing my optics. I was getting tired and a lot of dark thoughts were swirling in my processor. Part of it, I knew, was lingering influences from the dark-en exposure. But part of it was also the very valid anger and hurt from abandonment of my father and the ensuing actions he had taken ever since my journey had begun.
"So," Sideswipe said conversationally. "You used to be human, too." Clearly he was talking to Shadowstreaker. "You ever miss it?"
I peeked an optic open to see Shadowstreaker shrug slightly.
"Sometimes," he said. "I miss my family. It's been several years since I made the change, but I don't think that will ever go away. And there are some things about being human I miss."
"Such as?" Sideswipe asked curiously.
Sunstreaker reached across me and bopped him on the helm. "Don't press him," he said. "He doesn't have to talk about it if he doesn't want to."
"What? Shadebreaker doesn't really talk about it," Sideswipe said. "I mean, besides her fiancée and family. She never really talks about missing anything else."
"That's cause I don't really miss anything else," I said with a tired tone. "Everything I don't do anymore are things I could still do, just not with the same people. I mean, there are games and stuff I used to play and do that I don't anymore that I miss…but I technically still could if I had time. So it's not really stuff I miss about being human specifically."
"You don't miss any foods?" Shadowstreaker asked curiously.
"I mean, mochi ice cream was really good," I said, shrugging. "And, while I got to enjoy a variety of Cybertronian foods a little while ago, nothing I've tried even comes close to being the same."
"Yeah, ice cream sounds rather different from anything we have," Sideswipe agreed.
"I don't think I ever had mochi ice cream myself," Shadowstreaker said, raising an optic ridge.
"Aw man, well you missed out," I said. "It was my favorite ice cream treat in the whole world of ice cream treats. Regular mochi was meh, but the ice cream version? Mua, chef's kiss." I made the motion to go along with my words. "If a food qualified as comfort food for me, that would be it. Though I never really felt like food was a comfort for me."
"Ah, that would explain, perhaps, why you don't miss a lot from being human," Shadowstreaker said. "Most of what I miss outside my family is foods. And activities, which, like you said, I can still partake in when there's time."
"It's not like I don't enjoy foods, it's just not like," I paused to consider my words. "Not something I think about until I'm hungry. And then I'm thinking about what to eat and such. Sometimes, then, I miss certain foods. Like salads. I used to love salads. Spicy food was great. And pomegranates. I've only seen one Cybertronian fruit so far. And it was not tasty. Really bitter."
Sideswipe laughed. "Cyber-grapefruit?" He guessed.
"Yes," I said, pointing a finger.
Sunstreaker made a face as Sideswipe laughed. "I knew a femme once who was obsessed with those. Along with…" he said the name of a food I was unfamiliar with and the pronunciation of which I had never heard before. "Which is another fruit found on one of the moons of Cybertron with this really sweet taste. She was an…interesting femme."
"Ugh, yeah, I remember her," Sideswipe said, sobering and making a face.
"I got the impression the mech at the pub who gave me the fruit to taste had a past time of seeing what bots did and didn't like cyber-grapefruit," I said, slightly amused by their anecdote and trying not to let my curiosity make me press for details. They both clearly didn't want to elaborate by the energy they were putting off.
"Was he Praxian?" Sideswipe asked, mood shifting as his brother shuddered.
"Yeah," I replied.
"Ah, yeah," Sunstreaker said. "You should see Prowl introducing bots to noodles. He loves watching bots struggle with chopsticks."
"Noodles?" Shadowstreaker asked curiously.
"Noodles!" I said. "Oh! No wonder you still miss human foods if you haven't had noodles!"
"A trip to the pub awaits!" Sideswipe declared, standing to his pedes.
"Have fun," I said, getting to my pedes and stretching.
"Aw, don't want to come introduce your cousin to noodles with us?" Sideswipe asked as Sunstreaker narrowed his optics.
"Hmm, maybe another time," I said, shrugging a bit. "I'm tired, don't really wanna walk so far."
"We could just portal over," Sideswipe said temptingly.
"That takes energy, too, you know," I replied, raising an optic ridge.
"Come onnnn." Sideswipe wheedled.
"Sideswipe," Sunstreaker said sternly. "She said no."
"Alright, but you'll miss out on all the fun!" Sideswipe said, casually bouncing toward the door.
Sunstreaker rolled his optics at his brother. "Shadowstreaker didn't even say he wanted to go," he pointed out.
"I would be down to try some noodles," he said amiably. "Though I am sorry you won't be joining us, Shadebreaker."
"Meh, it's ok," I said. "I had plenty of noodles during my stay with the Circle." It had become one of my favorite dishes, due to the fact that it reminded me of home in a way. "Besides, we'll have plenty of time to get to know each other over the course of our medbay stay, I'm sure. While I recover and your quarters are sorted out."
"Indeed," Shadowstreaker said. "I will see you later."
"See you," I nodded to him and then watched as he joined Sideswipe on the way to the door.
"You guys go ahead, I'll catch up," Sunstreaker called to them.
Sideswipe waved a hand in acknowledgement and then led Shadowstreaker through the door and into medbay to head through and out to the streets.
"Are you ok?" Sunstreaker asked, looking sideways at me.
I shrugged. "I'm as ok as I can be," I replied, not looking at him.
Sunstreaker stared at me. I could feel it. "I would've expected you to come with us," he said. "We were out here cause you didn't want to be alone."
"Eh," I shrugged. "I'm feeling better in that regard. And there are others in medbay. I'm really just too tired to make the trip." It wasn't a lie, even if it wasn't the main reason. Still made me feel a little guilty not telling him, though, even if I wasn't because I didn't want him to overreact.
Sunstreaker narrowed his optics again. "Ok," he said after a long moment. "If you say so." His tone said he didn't believe me in the slightest. "But, just so you know, you're a slag liar."
I startled slightly as he moved away toward the door. I wanted to defend myself, because I didn't lie, but I knew better. I was omitting a reason, after all. And technically that was a lie of omission. I watched him go, feeling guilt and sadness in my spark. I wished I felt ok going to the pub, but I didn't want to cause a problem due to Mirage's view of me.
They all secretly think that of you… the thought floated through my processor alongside several others that had floated in and out since spelunking into the Earth's core to face Unicron. I ignored it like the others. Tried to, anyways.
I sighed and moved toward the door myself, intending to find Bumblebee and Bluestreak, who were both also still in medbay and conscious—Drift was in and out with the withdrawals and right now he was out, which was better than trying to claw his own derma off. Or biting someone who was preventing him from doing so.
Megatron growled as he surveyed the damage to the bridge, optics taking in the sparking consoles and the shattered view screen from where several Insecticons had apparently charged onto the ship from outside.
"Tell me, Starscream," he said. "How did this happen?"
"Airachnid took advantage of your absence, my liege," Starscream said, bowing slightly as his wings twitched nervously. "She talked some of the troops into working with her to stage a coup while you were away. She intended to take control over the ship and leave the system. She and those she'd convinced to follow her are being kept in the brig. Awaiting your judgement, my Lord."
"Hmmm," Megatron hummed thoughtfully. "And you did not join her, Starscream?"
"Tch," Starscream scoffed. "Why would I do that? When I know the cost of betraying you, my Lord? Besides, the AllSpark is here? What benefit is it to the Decepticons to leave?"
"Hmph, well spoken, my second-in-command," Megatron said.
Starscream paused and almost preened at the unexpected praise. Almost.
"Tell me, though," Megatron said, walking over to a damaged console that was flickering between on and off.
Starscream stiffened as he did, knowing who's station it was.
"Where is your companion? Lunarstrike?" Megatron asked.
"She left during the truce, before Airachnid's actions took shape," Starscream replied. "She went to go pick up something that was left behind somewhere for me." He shifted his wings slightly, holding a long digit to his chin thoughtfully. "She should be back before long. It really shouldn't be that hard to locate."
"Really?" Megatron asked, walking around to move closer to Starscream. "And you're certain she will return?"
"She assured me so," Starscream replied, standing up straight and looking his leader in the optics.
Megatron considered his second for a long moment. "And what is this…trinket you sent her to pick up for you?"
"Nothing of any particular note," Starscream said, waving a hand. "An heirloom left me by my parents. Of no relevance to the war. I waited until there was nothing she would be needed for to send her for it for that reason. I had no way of knowing Airachnid would pull what she did. Had I known, I would've kept her close, to help in the fight."
"Very well, then, Starscream," Megatron said, starting back toward the doorway. "Have the troops land the Nemesis somewhere safe for repairs. And let us hope Lunarstrike returns to us safely. We don't need any unnecessary losses."
Starscream swallowed at the unspoken threat. "Y-yes my Lord," he said.
Megatron smirked slightly and then left the bridge to Starscream and the troops within. What Starscream didn't know, wouldn't hurt him. For now, he had more pressing business to attend to.
"Megatron," Airachnid said in her usual airy tone of voice. She coughed a bit, clearly still bearing some heavy damage from her fight with Soundwave. "To what do I owe the pleasure?"
"I think you already know the answer to that question, Airachnid," Megatron said smoothly as he knelt in front of her bound form where she sat in the center of her cell. "Tell me, what made you think you'd succeed in staging a coup?"
"Heh," Airachnid seemed amused. "Have you seen my Insecticons, my Lord?"
"Yes, interesting that they followed you into battle," Megatron said, tilting his helm slightly. "Given they usually follow Shockwave."
Airachnid smirked. "Shockwave's not one of them, however," she said. "He doesn't have the ability to have a hive mind with them. Not like I do."
"Interesting," Megatron said.
"And, if you forgive me, Lord Megatron, I can control these Insecticons to follow you," Airachnid said, bowing her helm to him. "I swear it."
Megatron sneered. "And how am I to trust you won't backstab me again?" He asked.
"I have seen the error of my ways, my lord," Airachnid said. "After all, if I couldn't even stand up to Soundwave, how could I ever hope to stand up to you? Even with my Insecticons?"
"Hmm," Megatron hummed. "Interesting proposition. And what will you give me in return for my forgiveness?"
"What more can I offer you but my undying loyalty and devotion?" Airachnid asked, looking up with desperation in her pink-purple optics. She knew if she could not convince him, she'd be killed.
"How effective is the tracking skills of the Insecticons?" Megatron asked.
"You want us to go on a hunt, my lord?" Airachnid asked. "Whatever for?"
Megatron reached out and took the spider bot by the throat, gripping tightly as she gasped. "Answer the question, Airachnid." He stood, lifting her off the ground by her throat.
"The scouts are very adept, my lord!" Airachnid gasped out. "I-I can have them track wha-whatever it is you d-desire. They will li-listen t-to me without q-question."
"Hmm," Megatron hummed. He tightened his grip slightly. "You have yet to convince me, however, that you will not betray me again."
"P-please, my lord," Airachnid gasped. "I-I won't! I won't!"
Megatron released her then, dropping her to the floor. "Very well. I will grant you one more chance." He knelt and released her from her cuffs. "Better not make me regret it."
He turned and marched from the cell, quite aware of the glare Airachnid bore into his back on the way out.
Arcee chuckled at something Firestar said as they sat together in a booth at the pub. "You're crazy, you know that?"
"Ah, just you wait," Firestar said, waving her Nova Blast at her. "Some day you'll be the one sounding crazy to your juniors about a mech you love."
Arcee rolled her optics at that. "Yeah, yeah," she said disbelievingly. "Sure. And then Earth pigs will fly."
"Hey, you never know," Firestar shrugged. "Maybe Wheeljack will give them wings."
Arcee snorted. She glanced over at the door when she heard it open, just to see who was entering. She was a little surprised to see the new mech, Shadowstreaker, enter with the twins. She eyed him a little suspiciously. Word had reached her that the mech shared a relation to Shadebreaker, though not much else. Pair that with the fact he'd arrived with Solarcharge—the mech everyone knew by now had attempted a kidnapping of the femme and was banned from base—and she wasn't entirely sure he was to be trusted.
Shadebreaker's relatives weren't known to be trustworthy so far. But mostly it was the lack of information about him and dubious connection to the femme's brother that made Arcee suspicious.
"It's weird to see the twins hanging out with the new guy," Firestar commented offhandedly. "They don't usually make friends very quickly."
"They're vetting him," Arcee responded, turning her attention away, but keeping half an optic on the trio as they took seats at a table nearby. "They've become decently close with Shadebreaker since she started training with Sunstreaker with swords. After Solarcharge, we're all a little on edge when it comes to him. They want to make sure he's not intending to do something similar."
"Ahh," Firestar said. "That makes much more sense."
"Hmm," Arcee hummed.
Mirage appeared at the mechs' table out of thin air, right next to the large mech and Arcee was impressed at the sheer lack of reaction this action garnered out of him. On his part, Mirage looked a little irked at failing to startle the mech.
"Poor Mirage," Firestar observed. "Better luck next time."
Mirage walked off after taking the orders, looking more than a little disgruntled, and Arcee turned the bulk of her attention back to her conversation with Firestar.
"How's your plushie making going?" She asked curiously.
"Going. Would be nice to have someone to give them to," Firestar lamented.
Arcee chuckled. "I mean, you could always give some to Shadebreaker," she suggested. "She's mentioned to me before that she used to love plushies. I'm sure she'd be happy to take some off your hands. She hardly even has anything to her name these days. Besides datapads upon datapads."
"Oh, that's right," Firestar said, sympathy on her face. "She came here with hardly anything."
"Not hardly anything," Arcee corrected. "She basically just had the armor on her back and a box full of med-grade."
"I'll check in with her later, see what she might like, then," Firestar said sympathetically.
"I can go with you if you like," Arcee offered.
"I'm sure she would like to see her friend," Firestar smiled.
"I got training after this, but maybe after? Say, around dinner?" Arcee suggested.
"It's a date," Firestar said.
They talked over their lunch a little longer and were rewarded for the time they took with being a peripheral audience to the new mech's first attempts to use chopsticks to eat noodles. It was highly amusing and Arcee finally understood why Prowl got such a kick out of it. Sideswipe's laughter was almost contagious as the mech dropped the noodles time and again, refusing to switch over to a fork when offered by a bemused Sunstreaker.
Finally, after many failed attempts, Shadowstreaker got some noodles to stay in the chopsticks long enough to get them in his mouth haphazardly. The mech obviously enjoyed the noodles by the look on his face and the declaration of them being amazing. It was amusing to watch, really. She knew Shadebreaker had tried noodles already and wondered how the experience measured up to the mech's.
"Alright," Firestar said, finishing her cube of energon. "Well, I gotta get back to work. Meet you at my place at five? Then we'll go to medbay?"
"You got it," Arcee said. "I'll pick up some dinner along the way. I'm sure our medbay captives would appreciate some pub treats."
"Indeed," Firestar agreed. "Just make sure they're Ratchet approved or we'll never hear the end of it."
"Naturally," Arcee chuckled.
Firestar entered medbay later that evening with Arcee and found the main room in a bit of chaos. Chromia was in the middle of cursing Ratchet out about something while Drift wrestled against Ironhide and Breakdown nearby. Shadebreaker was nearby, wings drooped low and helm feathers flattened against her helm as Knock Out carefully tended her hand, which was bleeding.
"What happened?" Firestar asked gently, choosing to approach Shadebreaker and Knock Out.
"Drift is struggling with the dark-en withdrawals pretty hard," Knock Out reported. "Shadebreaker here was talking with him when they hit and she tried to stop him from hurting himself and got bit in the process."
"Ouch," Arcee said. "Hands are super sensitive. I didn't peg Drift as the biting type. At least until he bit Optimus."
"It's the withdrawals," Knock Out replied. "They drive you mad with the cravings. Many mechs died from them from self-destructing. If he wasn't trying to hurt himself, he'd be tearing the place apart trying to find a source of dark-en. He can probably sense there's no dark-en or is cognitive enough to know there isn't any." He glanced back and relaxed slightly. "Ah, I see Breakdown was able to sedate him now. Good. At least there's that. He gets some moments of clarity, and that's a good sign. Means they're not as bad as last time."
"That means he'll live, right? If it's not as bad as last time?" Shadebreaker asked, her voice sounding hollow, empty. She swallowed slightly.
"We're doing everything we can for him, Psychic," Knock Out said gently. "But he's a stubborn mech. He made it through last time. He probably will this time."
Shadebreaker didn't reply, just let out a sigh and ducked her helm slightly, watching Knock Out wrap her wounded hand. The fact she didn't say anything about Knock Out's chosen nickname for her said everything they needed to know about her state of mind. Whether it was Drift's state of being alone, the rest of everything that was weighing on her or the lingering effects of dark-en on her, was hard to tell. Firestar was sure it was a combination of it all.
"We brought some dinner for everyone," Firestar said, trying to ignore the conversation still going between Chromia, Ratchet and now Ironhide that seemed to be calming down now. She held the bag she'd taken over carrying for Arcee up a little to show Knock Out.
"I'm sure everyone will appreciate it," Knock Out said, shooting her a grateful look.
"What's Chromia mad at Ratchet for?" Arcee asked, raising an optic ridge.
"Oh that? She didn't like his response time to Drift's meltdown," Knock Out waved a hand.
"It wasn't Ratchet's fault," Shadebreaker said quietly, holding her wounded hand after it was released in her good one, over her spark. "Chromia's just in a bad mood. Ratchet responded as fast as he could. It's not his fault Knock Out and Breakdown were here faster. They were just closer."
"Oh," Arcee said, seeing the problem. Chromia didn't trust the two ex-Cons yet and thought Ratchet shouldn't have left them unsupervised in the room with Shadebreaker and Drift. "Where was Ratchet?"
"Seeing to Bluestreak's care in the other room," Shadebreaker replied. "He's got a virus. We think the one Chromia has. His symptoms are pretty bad, too."
Firestar sighed at that news. "Poor mech." She said sympathetically.
"Yeah," Shadebreaker said.
"Well, it sounds like Ironhide's got them handled," Arcee said, glancing over. She reached out toward Shadebreaker. "Why don't we sit down for some dinner, eh?"
"Sure," Shadebreaker said, though she didn't sound into it.
Firestar glanced at Knock Out as Arcee led Shadebreaker away.
"Shadebreaker defended Ratchet and Chromia yelled at her, too," Knock Out explained. "Said she was too trusting. She went to yell back, but she kinda just shut down. I just pulled her away then and Ratchet kept her attention on him then."
"Poor femme," Firestar said softly.
"Yeah," Knock Out said.
"I'll see if Arcee and I can coax her into a better mood," Firestar said.
Knock Out shrugged and then accepted the bag of food for the other patients and medics before Firestar moved toward the couches.
"Sometimes Chromia just gets in moods," Arcee was explaining when Firestar joined them. "She doesn't actually think you are too trusting."
"Hmm," Shadebreaker hummed doubtfully, curled up on the couch with her back to Arcee.
Arcee sighed a bit. "You've never really seen her yell outside of battle or battle practice before, huh?"
Shadebreaker shook her helm slightly.
Arcee rubbed her back gently. "And you're really sensitive to such things?"
Shadebreaker nodded her helm at that. "It's loud," she said, tone sad and hurt. "And angry. And I've had so many bad experiences with yelling. Especially the angry kind."
"Trauma," Firestar said, kneeling on the floor on her knees in front of the couch. She reached out a hand and brushed a hand over her helm. "It shapes how we feel about many things. Sometimes those feelings can last our whole lives."
Shadebreaker nodded. "I don't trust without reason either," she said quietly. "Her saying that…brought me back to something an ex-friend said once. Who is an ex-friend for a reason. They thought I was too trusting. The real problem there was that I was too willing to forgive without a real apology, without a real change in behavior." She heaved a heavy sigh. "They said it because they thought I was blind to all their lies and manipulation, that I was stupid and gullible. I'm not, though. I'm not. I knew every time. I was just foolish enough to let it slide for a long time. I'm not that foolish anymore. I just still believe in giving people a chance."
"And there's nothing wrong with that," Firestar said gently, stroking her helm as Arcee rubbed her back.
"You think you can eat?" Arcee asked. "I brought pretzels." She tried making it sound like the most enticing thing in the whole universe.
"Errrmmm," Shadebreaker made a noise that was not an agreeing one, shifting to bury her face in the arm of the couch.
Firestar looked up to see where the discussion between Chromia, Ratchet and Ironhide was. It seemed like it was in a good place, the body language more relaxed and Chromia was looking apologetic. She didn't look particularly happy, but it seemed like they might be moving on soon. She then turned back to Shadebreaker.
"I brought you something else, too," she said, trying that tactic. "I have on good authority that you'll greatly enjoy it, too."
Shadebreaker shifted her helm to peak at her.
"But, you gotta eat something first," Firestar said sternly. "Even if it's desert before dinner. So, eat, say half your cube of energon or half a pretzel, and I'll show you what I brought you."
Shadebreaker let out a quick huff of air at that, irritated. "It's hard to eat when I'm upset," she said, tone defeated. "It makes me feel sick. Bribing will not make that disappear."
"I see," Firestar said, expression sympathetic. "I didn't realize that. I apologize. I'm just trying to get some sustenance in you. You need it to counteract the dark-en influence that's contributing to your negative emotions."
"It's okay, I understand," Shadebreaker said with a sigh. "I know I have been struggling consuming enough to deal with that today. It's part of why Chromia's actions hit me so hard."
"What can we do to help you feel better so you can eat?" Firestar asked softly.
Shadebreaker shifted a wing slightly and her helm feathers flattened further.
"Would it help if Chromia apologized and you two could talk about what happened?" Arcee asked.
Shadebreaker nodded. "It's not the only factor, just the latest on the pile, but…it would help, I think," she said quietly. "It's worth a shot. And communicating about it is good for our friendship in any case. I know that much past the fog in my processor."
Firestar nodded. "I think she's about ready to come over," she said. "Do you want to sit up?"
"Hmm, no," Shadebreaker said. "I feel queasy and this helps."
"Aw femme," Firestar said. "I'm gonna run a scan, ok? In case Drift passed a virus to you with that bite."
"Ok," Shadebreaker said, though her tone said clearly that she doubted that was it.
"There is a virus going around the medbay patients," Arcee said.
Shadebreaker made an acknowledging noise as Firestar pulled a scanner from subspace. The scan was complete by the time Chromia and Ironhide were making their way over.
"Well, good news is, no virus," Firestar reported.
"Yay," Shadebreaker said unenthusiastically.
"Is she not feeling well?" Ironhide asked with a frown.
"She's feeling queasy," Arcee said.
"It's the emotions," Shadebreaker said, shifting slightly. "From everything. And then being yelled at for what I feel is an unjust reason." There was a slight bite to her tone.
Firestar saw Chromia flinch before the femme came around the couch. She moved to allow the blue femme to take her place. She watched as Shadebreaker turned her helm to consider her with a frown.
"Hey," Chromia said softly. "I'm sorry I yelled at you. You were just defending Ratchet when you felt I was being unfair to him."
"You were being unfair to him," Shadebreaker said. "He had to take care of Bluestreak. He can't just keep Drift on his heels 24/7 because he's volatile. You know that."
Chromia sighed. "I do," she said softly, sounding regretful. "But I also know that Knock Out and Breakdown aren't supposed to be practicing medicine without supervision right now. I know you were in here, but you aren't a practicing medic who's qualified to supervise them. They're also fresh out of the Decepticons. They're also unknown medics and I have trauma related to medics I am dealing with that has been made more difficult to deal with due to the dark-en influence I am dealing with."
Shadebreaker heaved a sigh at that. "I guess we both have trauma we're having more trouble dealing with because of the dark-en exposure," she said quietly. She shifted and reached a hand out to Chromia.
"Yeah," Chromia agreed and took the owlbot's hand gently in hers. It was the bitten one, so she was ever so gentle as she massaged the fingers where the bandages didn't cover. "But it doesn't make my treatment of him, or of you, ok. Especially since it even prevented him further from doing his job."
"No," Shadebreaker agreed. "The dark-en exposure influence explains it, though. This is the first time I've even seen you yell like that."
Chromia chuckled. "It's not the first time I've done it, though," she said drily. "First time I've stopped Ratchet from doing his job for another patient, though. Usually I would have ordered him to take over, not have Ironhide do it. In the end, Breakdown still did the dirty work, which is what I was mad about."
Shadebreaker snorted slightly. "The dark-en influence making you illogical? Who would've guessed it?" She joked.
Chromia chuckled slightly at the joke before sobering. "Can you forgive me?"
Shadebreaker was silent for a long moment. "Yeah," she said, squeezing her fingers slightly. "I forgive you."
Chromia smiled gently and reached out to rub her helm gently. "You think you can sit up and eat something? We need sustenance if we are to shake the lingering influence of this stuff with any speed."
"Ugh," Shadebreaker said, making a face. "None of my information indicated the emotional and mental issues we've been dealing with from mere exposure. Energy and physical symptoms? Yes, that I expected. The whispers in the mind, not so much."
"We'll get through it," Ironhide assured, reaching over the back of the couch to place a supportive hand on her shoulder, rubbing his thumb over it. "But you need to drink your energon and eat your snacks. Intaking plenty of fuel will counteract the effects and help your systems purge the lingering effects out of your systems."
"Hmm," Shadebreaker groaned slightly. "I will do my best."
"If you're still queasy, I can check with Ratchet for some anti-nausea for you." Firestar offered as she took a seat on one of the giant bean bags that had been brought in from the lesser used lounge as a temporary replacement for the demolished couch.
"I think I'll be good without," Shadebreaker said as she shifted into a seated position.
"Alright." Firestar said. "Let me know if you change your mind."
Shadebreaker nodded and then they distributed the energon they'd brought from the pub for lunch. About halfway through, Firestar called a pause.
"I promised earlier I would give you my gift after you drank half a cube of energon, so that's what I'm gonna do," Firestar said when Shadebreaker gave her a confused look.
"I thought that was mainly to get me to eat," Shadebreaker said, amused, but also clearly pleased at her keeping her word.
"It was, but that doesn't mean I shouldn't still keep my word," Firestar said.
Shadebreaker made a soft purr noise, causing Chromia to chuckle from her spot next to her.
"Wasn't expecting that, huh?" Chromia asked.
"I was honestly expecting it to be completely forgotten about since the bribe didn't work," Shadebreaker said honestly.
"Even though I said I brought it before I thought you needed a bribe to eat?" Firestar asked.
Shadebreaker nodded, helm feathers shifting slightly. "It wouldn't have been the first time," she said. "I've been promised things many times in my life. As a bribe, to pay me back for things and just because, and never got the follow-through. By people I trusted a lot and knew a lot better than you. So, I didn't even really know if you would hold to the bribe. Part of why bribes don't work on me, even outside of food. Bribes only ever work from a select few people. Who are no longer in my life."
"Aw femme," Chromia said, wrapping an arm around her and snuggling the owlbot. "Rest assured when we try to bribe you, we will always make do."
"And this was a gift I had for you regardless of the bribe," Firestar said. "I just thought I'd use it to entice you to eat. Now I know that's not a thing that works."
"I'll try to believe that," Shadebreaker said, though she was clearly skeptical.
Firestar smiled gently, understanding it would take time to gain her trust in regards to such things. "Anyways," she said, moving on. "I have on good authority that you used to have a fondness for plushies."
"Mayyybe," Shadebreaker said, looking a bit sheepish as she glanced at Arcee, who smirked at her.
Firestar smiled. "I happen to have a hobby of making plushies."
Shadebreaker's wings perked and her helm feathers shifted in interest.
Firestar smiled at that and produced a plushie out of her subspace. It was one Shadebreaker would be able to hold in one hand around its middle of a cyber-cat—an animal she also had on good authority that the femme was fond of. It was black and grey in color with orange optics and a friendly look on its face, posed in a sitting position. She passed it to the femme, who took it with a look of interest.
"For you," Firestar said. "And I figure, if you like, maybe you could take some more off my hands. Or, I could make one that you'd like specifically. I sometimes get orders, but several pieces of my work ends up sitting in boxes these days."
Shadebreaker looked it over, inspecting it. "This is amazing," she said, tone a bit in awe. "I love it, Firestar. Thank you." She paused, hesitation clear in her body language. "You said you'd make me one specifically?"
"You got something in mind?" Firestar asked.
Shadebreaker shifted a wing slightly. "You ever hear of squishmellows?" She asked.
"Squishmellows?" Firestar asked.
"They're a human plushie," Shadebreaker said. "Super soft and squishy, but will go back to their original shape every time. Even after being machine washed. I used to have one that I would hold during times like earlier when I'm struggling with emotion…it helped." She shifted a wing uncertainly. "Like an emotional sponge. I'm not sure how else to describe it."
"I think I understand," Firestar said softly, optics soft on the femme. "Like a security blanket, except without the mechanical components."
Shadebreaker's helm feathers shifted slightly. "Sure," she said and Firestar got the distinct impression that she had thought they had two separate ideas of what a security blanket was.
Firestar chuckled softly. "I think I can make something like that," she said. "Give me some time to do some research into what a squishmellow is and how it feels and such. And then I'll get back to you on more specifications. How's that?"
Shadebreaker nodded. "Sounds good," she said. Then she shifted slightly. "Thank you. For being willing to do so. And not making fun of me."
"I would never make fun of you," Firestar said, feeling her spark melt a little.
"A lot of people in the past have made it known that adults shouldn't love plushies as much as I do," Shadebreaker said softly. "But they bring me joy. And…we all need joy, regardless of age and circumstance."
"And you're absolutely right," Ironhide said gruffly.
"Besides, I love plushies, too," Firestar said. "Why do you think I make them?" Her optics sparkled. "It's not all to give away or sell. I make some specifically to keep. And a lot of my past customers have been adults with no sparklings or younglings. We may get older, but never outgrow the need for things that bring us joy. Plushies are something that can be enjoyed by all ages."
"I agree," Shadebreaker said, smiling, looking reassured.
"What're you gonna name your plushie cat?" Arcee asked.
"Hmm," Shadebreaker thought about it for a moment before settling on a name. "Figaro." She said.
"Figaro?" Arcee asked, raising an optic ridge.
Shadebreaker nodded. "To honor my childhood cat, who she looks like," she said. "That cat put up with so much. Literally so much. The chillest cat in the entire multiverse, I'm telling you what."
Chromia chuckled at that, highly amused.
"A contrast to my last cat before all this began," Shadebreaker said. "Koda was the most rambunctious, loudest, most hell raising cat I ever owned."
Chromia outright laughed at that while everyone else grinned or smirked in amusement at the description of the old cats. Shadebreaker grinned, pleased at bringing her fellow bots such amusement.
