Entry Twenty-Four

January 24, 2001

Today I woke up to my husband. I really hate those damn potions, because I am in deep sleep, I didn't know or even feel him lay in bed with me. I woke up to him holding me. When I woke up, Theo woke up as well. He kissed my forehead and said his good morning. Before I could say anything, he said Draco told him what happen yesterday. I said he also tell you about him getting me ready and our fight. He chuckled and said yes, he cursed at me and complained about how much of a prat you were. I laughed, I told Theo, we were complete imbeciles and Lucius had to physically pull us apart. Theo chuckled and asked where I had learned blood magic. I told him I read it in a book at home. That is when I remembered aside from the fighting and blood magic, I told him someone was trying to break through the barrier, it was the reason I had Draco it in the first place. Theo asked how I knew someone was trying to break through the barrier, I reminded him who was the one who broke barriers when we would go on missions. I also told him, when you work on breaking through them, there is a certain sound you hear, the thumping sound. When I heard that same thumping sound, it was instinctive to be alert. Theo then told me that the manor is now a fortress because the barriers have strengthened 100 folds. I said really, since I couldn't sense the magic myself, he said yes. The magic in the air is crisper and fresher. I just said that is good and showed him the ring Lucius gifted me. I told him, Lucius gave me this ring so I can go into this study when I want to look at the tomes he has in his personal library and I can take them as I please.

Theo looked at the ring on my finger and said the manor recognizes you as a Malfoy. I told him, well they are my adoptive family after all, who walked me down the aisle during our wedding and who was the most excited to plan it. He smiled and said, yes that is true. I asked him if he found out anything about what happen in Italy, he stated they only found out that the Order had placed an undetectable trace on me. How they did it, he doesn't know because I hardly went out. Before my magic was bind, I could feel other's magic aura, especially when it was on my body, I knew where it was at and I would clean it up, but now, I don't even feel anything. Since Theo will be going in and out of the Manor to do his business, I have to take the potion that binds my magical core to prevent another episode from happening again.

After we got up and got ready for the day, Theo had asked me if I was going to start researching the chains, I told him I was going to look at the books in Lucius' study, maybe there is something in there I could use to get them off. Theo then reminded me my inspection was coming up on the 31st. I had forgotten about it, every three months I have to go before the Dark Lord and get inspected. Mainly to check the chains of any magical residue or if any spells, charms or curses were used to remove them. The last time I got inspected, I had to be on bed rest for several weeks. Hopefully this time around, that won't be the case. I am trying to look at the damn glass half full. I asked Theo if I could be used as bait to catch some Order members, or what was remaining of them, that idea was shot down with a glare.

We had lunch with Narcissa and Lucius, and Theo left with Lucius to discuss some things in Lucius' study, and I sat with Narcissa sipping tea, when Draco came into the dining room and stood over me asking me what I had said to Hermione. I asked him what he was talking about, then I remembered my encounter with her, and I said did you have your pillow talk last night. He rolled his eyes, and said what did you say. I told him I didn't say anything, and if she had questions to ask you. He ran this hand through his hair and I could see the frustration on his face. I said why, did she pout to you about how I spoke to her. Draco sat down next to me, and said no. She was asking why she hasn't receive a ring with the Malfoy crest. Draco said he told her, only family members can have a Malfoy right, and that his mother and father have a exact same ring, and so does he and that I was given a ring. Apparently her insecurity of being left out was bothering her so much, she cried herself to sleep. I told Draco, I don't care for your wife, so whether she cries or not, I am not telling her anything.

In the afternoon, I went into Lucius' study and picked out an old black tome on ancient runes and incantations. I sat outside in the garden and read on the patio sofa, That is where I spend my afternoon, between reading a tome and taking cat naps. I woke up with a thrown covering me and the sun was beginning to set. I got up and took the book with me back to my room. As I was ready to go into my room, Draco's bedroom door open, Hermione stood at the door and called out to me. I was ready to walk into my room, and I turned and asked her what she wanted. She asked me where I got the tome I had in my arms. I looked down at the tome and looked at her and said from Lucius study. Before she could reply I went in to my room and shut the door. Ever since Hogwarts, I never got along with her. Draco tried to plead with me to get along with her, but I refused to give in. I am sure she is going to complain to Draco about it, but I don't care.

I got to have dinner in my room with Theo. Theo asked me what I was reading, I told him I was reading about ancient runes and incantations mainly on family bloodlines. I then asked him, do you think if I were to do one of these blood magic bonding with the Malfoy, it would change the structure of my magical core and these chains would become ineffective because my magical core isn't going to the same. Theo didn't say anything, and just looked at me. I said I'm just shooting into the dark about all of this. He finally spoke and said, there is a possibility. I just said I would read more into it and sat at my desk and wrote in one of my notebooks with my little theory and notes about my read and also specific runes to be used. That is when I thought, I wonder if I can manipulate the runes and change the incantations, if that would work as well. Theo saw me concentrating and writing furiously, he stood beside me looking down at what I was writing, and he said no. I looked up at him, and said what. He said no, absolutely not. You are not going to experiment on yourself with blood magic. I said its just a theory I have, if it comes to fruit, I'm sure we can use some live subjects. Yes, I sound like a complete nut, but its worth a try. Urgh, and I thought the one person who can help me would be Granger, but the experimenting on people, she isn't going to be happy about. Theo pinched the bridge of his nose and told me to stop.

This is where we got into an argument about it. His stance was I was being reckless, and my rebuttal was how is it reckless when it hasn't even been done before. I said I want these chains off, I want to use magic again, I want to be normal or feel normal again. Theo was upset with me, and said you are putting yourself in a dangerous position. I asked how. I couldn't think of how I was putting myself in a dangerous position, I was trying to even out the playing field. Theo said because, if you do this, and if you succeed, who do you think is going to see it as a threat to the wizarding world. I said how is it a threat unless some idiot decides to use blood magic on muggles and muggle born. Theo responded with, if you can do this to change your magical core, there is the possibility of using it to take away one's magical core. I told him, did you know Theo in my tribe, there are already medicine men who can do that. They can take it out of you and use it for themselves. There is no changing or modifying your own magical core, they strip it away from you. Theo looked at me like I was mad, I said I've heard stories when I was younger of people capable of doing that. How they did it, I don't know. I never got to that level because my parents were killed. So, I don't even know if those people are still around to teach anyone, or they were all murdered as well. I said so let me do this, let me investigate this, right now its all theory and research. It might be a bust or it might be something life changing. I told don't be blabbing your mouth about it either and put this in the back of your mind where it won't be seen as well. This is something to kill time with since I have nothing else to do other than existing and taking up space.

Theo was upset and said fine, do as you wish. I said I will. It's not like you can stop me from thinking. And turn back to reading and taking notes. I just heard the bedroom door slam shut and one of the picture frames fall to the floor and shattering. I was in a foul mood after that, because I heard the door open, and without looking to see who came in, I said just let me fucking be, you aren't changing my mind. That is when I heard Draco's voice. I said what do you want now. He asked what was going on because he passed Theo in the corridor, and he looked pissed. I said oh that, well apparently, I can't use my brain or my thoughts. I looked at Draco and he looked confused, so I told him what I was doing, he was stupefied. I rubbed my eyes and said I don't want to hear it from you either. Draco put his hands up and said I didn't say anything, I said I can see it on your face. Then went to explain its just a thought that came to mind, and now I'm going to start researching it. So I spent the entire evening up to now reading and taking notes.

Now I am ready for bed, and Theo hasn't return. Since when does he have a moral compass.

Mad Mrs. Nott