The morning light danced across the living room, casting a soft glow on the well-worn couch where Scáthach lay, her eyes closed. Her mind was a thousand years away, lost in the battles she had fought and the lessons she had taught as a legendary warrior in the ancient lands of Dún Scáith. But the sound of her wife's laughter pulled her back to the present, to their modern home where the only battles were over who took out the trash and who got to watch their favorite show on Netflix.
Medb, her long pink hair cascading over her shoulders, danced around the room with a smartphone in hand. The phone's screen glowed with the familiar TikTok logo, and her golden eyes sparkled with mischief. "Honey, I've got it!" she exclaimed. "The perfect idea for my next viral video!"
Scáthach, ever the skeptic, opened one scarlet eye to peer at her partner. "And what, pray tell, is this brilliant concept?" she asked, her voice a mix of curiosity and amusement.
"I'm going to share my top tips on how to be a fabulous gay woman!" Medb announced, her voice filled with excitement. "You know, all the things I've learned over the centuries that make life just a little bit easier!"
Scáthach sat up, a smirk playing on her lips. "And what makes you an expert on such matters?"
Medb winked. "Oh, you know, just a bit of ancient wisdom and a touch of modern flair," she said, striking a pose. "Now, let's get started!"
Scáthach couldn't help but laugh as she watched Medb prepare to record. Her love for her mischievous wife grew stronger every day, even as the centuries passed. The juxtaposition of their ancient pasts with their modern lives never ceased to amaze her. Who would have thought the Queen of Connacht would become an internet sensation? But here they were, in their cozy Dublin flat, ready to tackle the world one TikTok at a time.
The camera rolled, and Medb began her spiel. "Hi, everyone! It's your favorite housewife, Mrs. O'Connell, and today I'm sharing some of my top-secret tips for the ladies who love the ladies! First up, always know your history. It's important to remember where you come from, and let me tell you, I come from a place where we knew how to throw a spear and rule a kingdom!" She giggled, tossing an invisible spear into the air.
Scáthach couldn't help but roll her eyes. "History is not the same as being fabulous," she muttered, though she had to admit there was some truth to Medb's words.
Medb spun around, her pink hair flying. "But it's the foundation, darling! Now, tip number two," she continued, her voice rising in excitement, "Never underestimate the power of a good wingwoman—or wing-goddess, in our case!" She winked at the camera before glancing back at Scáthach.
Scáthach felt a warmth spread through her chest. Despite her serious demeanor, she knew Medb was referring to her, the one who had always been by her side, through battles and wars, through love and heartache, through life and death and rebirth. She had been her wingwoman, her protector, and her lover. And now, she was about to become the unsuspecting star of a TikTok video.
The video went on, with Medb sharing her advice with the enthusiasm of a teenager. Each tip was met with Scáthach's eye rolls, which only seemed to encourage her more. "Tip number three," she said, her voice singsong, "Always have a good playlist ready for those dramatic moments. You never know when you'll need to strut your stuff out of a room!"
Scáthach leaned back against the couch, watching Medb perform. As ridiculous as it was, she couldn't help but feel a sense of pride. This was their life now, a world away from the battles they once knew, where their biggest challenge was keeping their cat off the curtains and not letting the milk go sour.
Medb paused the recording, looking over at Scáthach. "Well? What do you think?"
Scáthach considered her for a moment before speaking. "I think you've missed the most important tip of all."
"Oh, really?" Medb's eyes glinted with interest. "Do tell."
"Always stand by your queen," Scáthach said with a smirk. "Or in this case, your warrior queen."
Medb giggled, her cheeks flushing. She leaned over and kissed Scáthach's cheek. "You're right, my love. That one's a classic. Let's add it!"
The camera rolled again, and Medb looked into the lens with a serious expression. "Tip number four," she announced, "Always stand by your queen—or in this case, your warrior queen. Because let's face it, she's probably the one who'll save your ass in a bar fight."
Scáthach couldn't hold back her laughter anymore. She sat up, her long dark crimson hair cascading down her back as she playfully swiped at Medb's arm. "You're impossible," she said, though her eyes sparkled with affection.
Medb grinned, hitting the record button once more. "And that, my friends, is the secret to a happy marriage—even after a millennium," she said dramatically before the video ended.
As the camera stopped, Scáthach pulled Medb into a tight embrace, feeling her heart swell with love for this woman who had been her partner through so much. They had conquered so much together, and somehow, Medb always found a way to make even the mundane moments feel like an adventure.
"You know," Medb whispered into her ear, "I think we might just have a hit on our hands."
Scáthach sighed contentedly. "As long as I don't have to make an appearance in your videos," she teased.
"Never say never," Medb whispered back, her voice filled with mischief. "You never know when the world will be ready for a real-life legendary warrior queen."
The two of them shared a laugh, the warmth of their love surrounding them like a cozy blanket. As they pulled away, Scáthach couldn't help but feel a sense of excitement for what the future might hold. Whether it was fighting battles or making TikToks, she knew that with Medb by her side, it would be nothing short of epic.