Disclaimers: Naruto is not mine, sadly. This is purely a fanfic using someone else's characters.
Warnings: This story includes strong language, violence, sexual assault, explicit sexual content (yaoi), & angst.
Crazy About You
Chapter 7: Cravings
"How can you have any pudding if you don't eat your meat?"
- Pink Floyd
--
Naruto had never been kissed before, so he wasn't completely confident in what he was doing, but he'd have to be crazy not to kiss Sasuke back. Those soft lips moving against him, the sure grip tucked in his hair and around his waist..
Sasuke's kiss didn't just sweep him off his feet. It threw him into a completely different reality.
The feeling was so new and enticing.. if he didn't know any better, he would have thought he'd imagined it. It couldn't be real- things that were this good never were. And yet, when he nervously slipped his own fingers into Sasuke's long hair, when he pushed closer and felt the heat radiating off of him, he knew just how real it was.
"Mmnhnn.."
Naruto moaned against his lips and parted his own, welcoming Sasuke inside. He still wasn't sure that he was doing it right, but it felt good to be invaded by him. Consumed by him. Everything was slick and hot, and he instantly forgot himself and his troubles as he sank deeper.
The hands around him tightened as Sasuke rolled his hips, and things just as quickly became a lot more intense. Naruto could feel how hard he was, how badly he wanted him, and he couldn't help but feel panicked by it. Things were moving fast, and he just wasn't ready for it to go that far. Not yet at least.
The anxious blonde pushed against Sasuke's chest and wrenched his face away, forcing some much-needed space between them.
"W-wait" he breathed.
Sasuke's eyes burned with desire, a hint of anger flickering in their dark depths.
"I don't want to."
Before Naruto could protest further, Sasuke's lips captured his own once more. They were forceful, determined, and left him utterly breathless. Sasuke yanked the blonde closer, moving against him with the ferocity of his pent-up desires, and Naruto's anxiety spiked. He whimpered as he struggled to break free and after another searing second, Sasuke finally relented.
He pulled back and scanned Naruto's face, his dark gaze heavy with longing as he studied every inch of him. Naruto shivered under that look, but Sasuke refused to let it stray.
"Why push me away when I know you like it" he growled.
Naruto felt his face flush and knew Sasuke could see it. That stare hadn't faltered. It moved from his eyes down to his reddening cheeks- noting his embarrassment, wondering over it.
The blonde cleared his throat as he searched for the words that always seemed to be just out of reach.
"I've.. never done this before" he said, feeling awkward admitting it. And a little ashamed, to be honest. He hated to appear so inexperienced, but it was the truth, and he was never very good at hiding that.
"Never what- made out in an asylum bathroom?" Sasuke jested, eyes flickering with amusement.
Naruto wilted under the look, now even more embarrassed to admit the truth.
"Kissed.."
Sasuke's eyes widened, his shock apparent. "Wait. You've never been kissed before?"
Naruto bit his lip and after a brief pause shook his head.
The mirth in those eyes melted away, leaving soft obsidian pools in their wake, and now it was Naruto's turn to be surprised. He had never seen Sasuke look at him so gently, and he wondered what it meant. What he would say. How he'd feel about Naruto being so new to all of this- with him being so innocent despite being twenty-two years old. He wondered if his inexperience would be a turn off for him. If Sasuke would be impatient with it.
"Does it bother you that I-"
Naruto cleared his throat.
"I mean, are you.. disappointed?"
Sasuke sighed, a long breathy exhale. He dropped his head and pressed their foreheads together, a small smile pulling at his face. Naruto stared at it as he waited for his answer.
"Naruto" Sasuke whispered, his voice eliciting another shiver, "that's the last thing I feel."
The blonde leaned back, wanting to see those eyes he always seemed to lose himself in. "Really..?"
Sasuke's smiled. "I like being your only."
Naruto blanched at that, but it wasn't enough to completely relieve him of his concerns. "But I.. don't really know what I'm doing" he pointed out. "What if I'm not very good at it?"
Something sly, almost cruel, flashed in Sasuke's eyes but it disappeared before Naruto could get a good look at it.
"That's impossible" he said smoothly, confidently.
Naruto chewed at his bottom lip and Sasuke's desire flared to life all over again.
"Naruto."
He licked his lips.
"I don't think you know just how much I'm going to enjoy this."
--
Sasuke managed to snag another kiss, equally as passionate as the first, but once again Naruto put a stop to it. And Sasuke let him. Because he wanted to make sure he'd be able to do it again.
He wanted Naruto, fuck yeah he wanted him- especially after finding out that no one else has had him. How could he not? Naruto's warm, beautiful, odd enough to not be afraid of his erratic tendencies, strong despite his undeniable innocence. He's honest to a fault, far too humble for anyone that attractive, and he doesn't look away when things get ugly.
Everything about Naruto made him want him.
Sasuke thought he had destroyed all traces of his sentimental side a long time ago, but Naruto was quick to prove him wrong. The little schizophrenic in his psych ward, a guy he barely even knew, had somehow taken root under his skin and burrowed his way into his heart.
Sasuke was so enraptured by him that it hurt. He didn't want to be away from Naruto for a second. In fact, it was almost unbearable. And even when he was with him it didn't feel like enough. He wanted to be even closer, to bury himself deep inside of him and never find his way back out, but Sasuke had enough sense and reason left not to make that move.
Thank fucking god.
Because he needed his future uke to know that he wasn't like that bastard who tried to take advantage of him. Sasuke might be impulsive, spiteful, but he refused to be like that with Naruto.
Things would be different with him.
They had to be.
Sasuke gave his blonde one last heated look before stepping back. He turned to adjust his erection, tucking it into the waistband of his pants, assuming that Naruto was probably doing the same thing behind him. When he turned back he held out his hand, hoping that he hadn't just ruin everything between them, and was thoroughly relieved when Naruto took it.
I guess that's a good sign.
He tangled their fingers together then turned to unlock the door and peak out into the corridor. He was surprised to find it empty but wasn't about to tempt fate any further. He stepped out of the bathroom, pulling his blonde after him as he hurriedly crossed the hall and headed back to the community room. They paused at the corner and waited until there were enough distractions before slipping in to join the others.
Naruto started to head back towards the chair they spent most of their time in, assuming that's where they were headed, but Sasuke had a different idea. He veered away from it and instead pulled him over to a collection of tables and chairs in the center of the room.
Naruto gave him a curious look. "What are you doing?"
Sasuke glanced over at his companion, then abruptly yanked his arm forward, bringing him close to his side. Naruto squeaked in surprise and Sasuke couldn't help but smirk.
"I'm craving something sweet" he said quietly, "and since I can't have what I really want I'll have to settle for the next best thing."
Naruto's cheeks flushed an adorable pink and it took everything in Sasuke not to drag his tongue across it for a taste.
God, how is he so fucking cute..
And how has no one kissed him? How could anyone resist?
Naruto, unaware of the raven's spiraling thoughts, was surprised by the sudden spark of jealousy he felt. He wasn't sure what 'next best thing' Sasuke was referring to, but the words made him feel small. Insignificant.
He didn't want to be so easy to replace.
Sasuke must have noticed something on his face, because he gave his hand a reassuring squeeze and quickly answered his question before he could ask.
"Like I said, Naruto, I'm craving something sweet. So tell me-" his grin widened, "what pairs well with neuroleptics?"
Naruto laughed, humor and relief colliding into one, surprising both of them. He quickly coughed back the remnants of the unexpected sound, though Sasuke would have preferred to hear it for a bit longer. It was a side of Naruto he hadn't seen before. A side he liked.
"Pudding" Naruto answered. "Pills and pudding are the perfect combination."
"That does sound perfect" Sasuke murmured, "but I can think of a pair that's even better."
He stepped in front of the blonde, hand in hand as he met his gaze. He shifted closer and slowly brought his hand up to his face, not wanting to startle him. Azure pools stared up at him as Sasuke lightly dragged his thumb across Naruto's bottom lip. Those lips parted for him and a flare of unsettled desire stirred in Sasuke's groin.
Sasuke bit his lip. "And tastes better too.."
Naruto licked his lips, his tongue skimming across Sasuke's thumb, tempting him even more. His composure was wavering fast. If they weren't careful Sasuke was going to mount him in front of a room full of people.
"You know, I think I'm starting to crave something sweet too" Naruto murmured.
Sasuke let his hand fall to his side, but the grin stayed locked in place. "Is that right.."
His eyes sparkled with mischief.
"We are still talking about pudding right?"
"Right" Naruto replied. His voice lowered, but he held his gaze as he added, "for now."
"Jesus Christ, Naruto.."
The blonde tilted his head, those innocent eyes blinking up at him. "Hm?"
"You're lucky I don't have you in that bathroom."
The heat in his face came back with a vengeance, but before he could respond to that someone else did it for him.
"Hey you two!"
Naruto jumped and jerked back as an orderly approached. Sasuke looked pissed by the interruption, but he managed to hold his tongue.
"Hands off- you know the rules."
Sasuke's glare was not the least bit effective, but the man's stern voice was. Naruto quickly pulled his hand away, aggravating the raven even more.
The orderly gave them one more authoritative stare before finally stepping away. They watched him station himself along the perimeter closest to them. His eyes stayed locked on the two, clearly anticipating having to step in again. And while Sasuke was fine testing those boundaries, unfortunately Naruto wasn't.
Goddamnit.
Sasuke glared at the orderly, followed by all of the others surrounding and controlling their every move. He grated his teeth.
Fucking cock block.
--
Days passed and Naruto, well, he was feeling more anxious by the second. Not because Sasuke was handsy and impatient. On the contrary, it was because Sasuke wasn't attempting anything.
Nothing.
It's not like Naruto had suddenly become comfortable with all of this. In fact, the idea of going any further with Sasuke was nothing short of terrifying. He knew he wasn't ready for any of it- hell, he wasn't even completely sure he was ready to be kissed again. The sheer force of it made his head spin.
He shouldn't mislead him. It wasn't fair to lead Sasuke on only to reject him when he acted on it, when he wanted more. But now Naruto felt like the one rejected. He wasn't brazen enough to make a move but it did bother him that Sasuke hasn't. Since that time in the bathroom, he hasn't so much as touched him. And Naruto couldn't figure out why.
There had to be some kind of explanation, and maybe it was a simple one, but he couldn't shake the feeling that it was something he did. He could feel his insecurities getting the best of him, and with each passing moment those feelings grew stronger.
Maybe he doesn't want me anymore, he thought.
Maybe he realized he could do better.
Maybe he's not attracted to me now.
… Maybe he never was.
Naruto's anxiety surged as one particular thought took root- a constant concern in his life.
Maybe I just imagined the whole thing.
Naruto didn't want to believe that, and he was determined not to. He even started trying to earn back Sasuke's attention, his affection. He was now spending more time in front of the mirror each morning, futzing with his hair, his clothes- wondering what he could do to look more desirable. In the end it always looked unruly, his clothes permanently bedridden, and his confidence slipped even lower.
Sasuke seemed to notice the change in him, though he didn't understand it. He gave him a few curious looks, asked him if he was ok, and for once Naruto managed to keep his truth to himself. Sasuke accepted it at first, this dejected silent blonde of his, but it didn't sit right with him. He couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong, and his patience with it was deteriorating fast.
After several disquieting days, Sasuke had finally had enough. He strode into the community room that morning, his steps fast and sure. He spotted his blonde grabbing a pen from one of the art carts and quickened his pace to join him.
Naruto looked up at the sound of his approach and those cerulean eyes widened as he drew closer. Naruto took a step back, which only pissed the raven off more.
"Sasuke..?"
The raven ground his teeth together.
He couldn't stand seeing the fear in his eyes.
"So that's how it's going to be.."
Sasuke grabbed the blonde by the arm and jerked him close, baring his teeth. "Tell me what's going on with you."
Naruto stared at him, his brows furrowed. "I- I don't know what you're talking about."
"Yes you do" he growled. "And you're going to tell me what it is. Right now."
A gruff voice cut between them, irking the raven further. Sasuke could hear two orderlies stepping up to them and it took everything in him not to lunge at the assholes and bash their faces in for interrupting.
"Hey! I already told you two before. Step away from eachother."
Sasuke gave the blonde another dark look before turning his sharp gaze to the men storming their way. "Do you mind?" he snapped. "I'm trying to have a fucking conversation."
"Use your words instead of your hands, Uchiha."
Sasuke smirked. "I think we both know that's not what he wants."
Naruto flinched, and all humor fled from Sasuke's face. He quickly turned back to look at the blonde, his hand falling to the wayside as he spoke. "Naruto, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that."
The orderly was stunned to see him suddenly so apologetic. This wasn't a side they were used to seeing from him, and for a while all they could do was stand there and stare. But when Sasuke went to touch the blonde again, they sprang into action. One orderly slipped between the two of them, hands forcing them apart, and another grabbed hold of Sasuke's arm to pull him back another step.
"Alright, Romeo. Why don't you give him space, hm?"
"I'm not leaving him."
"Sasuke-" Naruto tried.
"No! I'm not leaving you!" He tried to wrench his arm free, but the orderly's grip didn't budge.
"Relax, alright. Just take a minute to breathe, get some breakfast, you can see him again later."
"Fuck you!!"
Sasuke jerked back and immediately slammed his fist into the man's face. The orderly dropped heavily to his knees and Sasuke lunged for the other, fully intending on doing it all over again, but this one was ready for him. He dodged his attack and grabbed his wrist. Before Sasuke could do more, his feet were kicked out from under him and he crashed to the floor.
"Wait! It isn't what you think. Sasuke wasn't bothering me."
Sasuke glanced up and found Naruto's worried eyes locked onto his face. He shifted his gaze and found the distrustful eyes of the orderly he had knocked down.
"Yeah, well, he's bothering us."
"It was just a misunderstanding" Naruto tried. "Please, it won't happen again."
The orderlies exchanged a look, and Naruto was almost certain they were going to listen to him. But they seemed to change their mind last second.
"Fine, but he's not staying in here."
"But he-"
"Uchiha's going to talk this out with the doc. And you-"
Eyes shot over to Naruto, narrowing.
"-stay out of trouble while he's gone."
Naruto wanted to object further, but it was clear that they weren't willing to listen. Naruto was just another delusional patient, and so many of the orderlies have become numb to their protests. They had no intention of changing their minds now.
The two worked together to heft the raven back to his feet and drag him out of sight. And Naruto stood perfectly still, staring after their retreating forms, left with guilt and the suffocating silence that came with it. He didn't know why Sasuke was so mad at him. He wasn't used to him being like that with him. But his anger this morning, his physical distance the last couple of days, it had to mean something.
He regrets it.
He thinks it's my fault. That I tricked him into liking me.
And now..
Now he doesn't want me.
Naruto gripped his chest, wincing at the sudden ache deep inside as those words echoed through him- over and over.
He doesn't want me.
He doesn't want me.
… No one does.
Author Note:
I'm craving so many things, and pudding sounds fucking majestic right now. But let's be honest- if angsty Uchiha love was on the table, it wouldn't even come close.
Don't lie- I know you all feel the same way.
- - -
Side Note:
briggettd96: I'm glad you're enjoying it. :)