Dr. Harriet "Harry" Block looked up from her phone and smiled at the man who had just entered into the breakroom, a sack lunch clutched firmly in his hand. No one at StarkLink ate at the same time as often the scientists were working on all manner of projects that were in various stages so one grabbed a bite when they could. As such there was always someone coming in or out of the break rooms (there were several throughout the building) getting something to eat.

And WHAT they ate was vastly different as everyone was working on different schedules. It was rather common for someone to be tucking into a bowl of cereal seated next to someone else who was finishing up a meatball sub.

Harry, for example, was eating a late lunch of a salad and her co-worker pulled out a dish that had what looked like spicy meatballs, based on the warm scent that was coming off of them.

"Felix, how are things at the Lab Zeven?"

"Well enough," Felix stated. "Clark is annoyed that the new mass spec. hasn't been delivered yet but you know how that is."

"Yeah, Clark can be a real prick," Harry said with a laugh. "And you know that he won't hardly use it anyway."

"Yeah that's-"

Felix tensed as a boom of thunder filled the air, making the building shake. He was alert, tense, body ready to spring into motion… and then he took a deep breath when nothing happened. Harry merely smiled and went back to their food. It was raining pretty good but honestly Harry loved the rain.

~MC~MC~MC~

Just a storm.

Not a world ending event. A galaxy ending event.

A… universe ending canon-related event.

At once Felix reached into his pocket and pulled out a notebook, thankful that Harry wasn't paying attention

'Five things around me,' he thought to himself, Harry not saying a word thankfully as he began the exercise. She was well used to him dealing with his anxiety, never pressing him on it. 'Four things I can touch… three I hear… two I smell… one I taste…' And then he looked down at the notebook and smiled at the photo that was in there. 'And something I love.'

That last one was his own addition. A reminder that life was good and he needed to remember that there was no danger. No threat. Nothing. That he would be going back home and see the people he loved once again.

It helped ground him. Stabilize him.

'Which is exactly what Chris and the others wanted,' he thought, trying to make himself feel bitter about what had happened two years ago but finding he just… couldn't.

"Still getting out early to see your niece's play?"

"Half way up, dead center," he informed her. "She offered to get me a free ticket but I told her to give it to someone that couldn't afford it." Harry nodded at that and they made a bit more small talk before she headed back to work, leaving Felix all by himself, enjoying his meal.

Which was great because when his phone rang and he saw just who it was he was so startled that anyone that might have seen him in that moment would have thought he was suddenly ill.

Quickly clicking the texting option he sent a quick message asking for a few minutes before he grabbed his meal and hurried to his office, thankful that none of his co-workers were up and around to notice that he was acting oddly. No, they were busy with their projects and he hoped desperately they remained busy.

He didn't want to be interrupted.

Locking the door Felix slowly ran his hands over his shirt and made sure that there was no sauce on his face. He knew it was utterly silly to be treating this like some date where he wanted to impress his inlaws but… but he couldn't help it. Once… once she had been the one person he knew he could trust. And while he knew that she, rightfully so, would never place her life in his hands again and it was very likely she was choosing now to call to just scream at him… a part of him wanted to show her that he wasn't a fuck up. That he had used the last two years on things that mattered. To become better.

Sending another text that he was ready Felix sat down and sent the call to his computer; he didn't want to have to deal with the image being so small that he could barely see it. He settled in his chair and looked straight ahead, doing his best to breathe.

'You can do this…' he thought to himself, even as he also made a mental note to schedule another appointment with his psychologist.

The screen flicked on as the call went through and he stared at the familiar face. There were changes, of course. Her face was a touch plumper than it had been before, when she had been working herself so hard that many Spiders, who were all famous for blanking on getting food, had commanded her to get something to eat. Her hair had been cut short though it was still as bushy and frizzy as ever, just with far less of it. Her makeup was toned down, not that she had worn much of it. And rather than her Spider Costume she was wearing a cream colored shirt, a chunky stone bracelet on her wrist.

"…you grew a beard."

Felix rolled his eyes at that. "Thanks Jess, good to see you too."

That made Jessica Drew grimace slightly. "Sorry just… wasn't expecting it, that's all." He frowned as he reached up and tugged on the hair that covered his chin before running his fingers along his fuzzy cheeks. He really hadn't thought about that, what others would think of the beard.

"Well… if that is what you want to focus on… what do you think?"

"Awful," she replied with a smirk. "You look like an old man."

"I am an old man," Felix reminded her. "Though I admit… the gray doesn't help. I thought about dying it but never could find the right color." He touched the spot of that was right under his lip that stood out with its gray color rather than the dark brown of the rest of his hair.

"Well, can't say I ever expected you to grow one out, Miguel."

"Miguel…" Felix said softly. "Miguel. Now… that's a name I haven't heard in a long time." He let out a melancholy sigh. "A long time."

"Yeah yeah, Obi Wan."

"huh?"

"Obi Wan. Kenobi."

Felix just stared blankly at her.

"Star Wars?"

"Is that a movie on your Earth?"

"…fucking hell Nueva York sucks," Jessica complained.

"Tell me about it," Felix agreed.

"Alright then… not Miguel then? Is that and the beard a mid-life crisis thing?"

He shook his head. "No… more out of necessity." Felix shook his head. "The Alliance-"

"Who?"

"The… Chris Chase and Otto and the Mary Janes."

"Oh," Jessica said. "We call them the Cabal here. Peter and me."

"Whatever," Felix said with a roll of his eyes. "Point is… they didn't leave me on my Earth when they Exiled all of us-"

"We call it the Time Out."

"…can we call it something a bit more dignified?"

"No." But then what he had said sunk in and Jessica blinked in surprise. "They didn't leave you on your Earth?"

"No. They said that Nueva York wasn't healthy for me… and I wasn't healthy for it. The Society was already set up, according to them… it would save them time to use what we had built. And me… they wanted to drive it in my head that Canon Events weren't real. So…" he waved his hand about, "they sent me to Gabby's Earth."

Jessica let out a long breath at that. "Gabby's Earth. Your daughter-"

"No. Not my daughter. I… I couldn't do that. Not again. I couldn't steal another man's life. Miguel O'Hara on this Earth is dead and he's not coming back."

"Uh, Miguel… or-"

He held up his hand. "I go by Felix now. Felix O'Hara."

"Huh. That… oddly fits you. Especially with the beard. Now it isn't as terrible." She smiled softly. "Still terrible."

"Of course."

"Okay, Felix… with Gabby's dad… you know that with our lives-"

"I know," Felix said with a nod. "I know. That's part of the reason why I didn't want to slip into his life. He might come back. I just meant it wouldn't be ME who resurrected him. So no… I knew I couldn't become Gabby's father. But her uncle? That… that I could do."

"That must have been hard," Jessica said softly.

"Yes and no," he admitted. "I mean… the technical aspects? That was easy enough. Her Avengers were willing to help me out a lot. Ginny Armstrong was a huge help; set up all the fake ids I needed in order to live my life here. Felix O'Hara, brother of Miguel O'Hara. Spent years traveling the most remote parts of the planet so that's why he didn't know about his brother's death. Returned two years ago finally ready to put his doctrines to a good use at StarkLink.

"But if you mean having to be around Gabby all the time… yeah, it hurts. She's a reminder of what I lost. But… I also remember that she isn't my Gabby. The two of us, about a week in, spent the night at her place and went over all the differences. It isn't a 1 for 1. There are a lot of differences on this Earth and that means she's different from my Gabby. Its… its really like she's my niece, you know? She's not my daughter. Never will be. But I don't mind her being a part of my life."

"I'm glad," Jessica said. "Listen, I-"

"Mamamamamamamama!"

"I… have to-"

"I'll wait," Felix told her and Jessica set the phone down before she hurried off towards the sound of her child. It made him realize he knew nothing about her baby. Was it a boy or a girl? Did it have Spider Powers? What were they like? He… simply didn't know.

It made him wonder if it even mattered if he knew.

"Alright, sorry about that," Jessica said as she returned. "So… okay, so I wanted to call you for a reason but now I am thinking it might not be as big of a deal because you probably wouldn't have even noticed. But I thought you'd be at Nueva York as part of… I don't know, the welcoming committee?" She shook her head and let out a scoff. "Yeah, that sounds stupid now that I'm actually thinking about it. No way that the Cabal or Alliance let you march around as the welcoming party. Uh, no offense."

"None taken."

Jessica stared at him for a long moment and Felix had a feeling it had to do with him just accepting her insults and her apology without even reacting. Or rather reacting with a casual shrug. He'd almost smiled at it because honestly it was a silly thing to think.

"Right," she finally said. "But still… in case you were looking for me… I'm not going back to Nueva York for this little meeting up the Alliance is running."

"I-"

Jessica cut him off. "No, let me finish. I… okay, so this is hard." She shook her head. "So I have my kid and that's when it kind of clicks with me, you know? I was running around PREGNANT. And I get that there all these people declaring that women were in the fields picking fruit and would give birth right there before getting back to work but they also tended to die when they were 40 at best so screw that." She reached up and played with a bit of her hair. "I was running around with this beautiful baby in danger. Cassie Strange… she sent me into the soul gem and I got to hold my kid before they were even born and I thought that was a gut punch but actually giving birth? You don't understand what that does, Miguel. What it means.

"I began thinking about how I prioritized the Society over everything else. My kid. My world. Risking everything for the Society. And… and I can't do that anymore. I need to be selfish. Or selfless. Heh. I don't even know anymore."

"Jessica-"

Once more she continued on. "And I know you are going to bring up Gwen. That I still need to fix that. But… but I think there are some things that can't ever be fixed, Miguel… Felix. Sorry. Felix. There are some things we just can't repair. Villains we can't ever get to become goods. Crimes that will never disappear. And relationships that will never be healed. I hurt her too much and… and I will just have to live with that. Because trying to force her into some tearful reunion is just going to hurt her even worse.

"Its… its something that I think a lot of people don't understand. I've been listening to all these videos about family members who have gone No-Contact and how the ones cut off tend to only want to fix things to make themselves feel better. They don't actually care about the people they hurt, not really. They want to make themselves feel better, to erase their guilt and get on with their lives. And it made me realize that me trying to push Gwen to talk to me… that was the exact same thing.

"If she wants to connect with me then she can. I let Margo know, so she could pass the message along to Gwen. It's the last time I'll reach out to her. I'm ready if she reaches out to me and she knows it but she also knows I won't push her. I… I hope she does, so I can apologize and make it right. But I also understand that what she might need is me not being there. And yeah, it hurts a lot because despite what she thinks I did care about her. I wasn't using her. I set things up but I did care.

"And that's how it is for the rest of the Society as well. They want to come find me they can and I'll make my amends. But the healthy thing is for me to… step back. To not force the issue. And that includes you. We don't work well together." She leaned forward. "We bring out the worst in each other, I see that now. I wish that wasn't the case but it's the truth. And I don't think its healthy for us to pick right back up. Because all of the strives we've made to improve ourselves and fix ourselves… all of that will come undone if we just leap back into what we once had. Its like how parolees are told to avoid their old crews, you know? The temptation is going to be there and… and I can't do it. Not anymore. And I get it, you are upset."

"I'm-"

"But this something-"

"Jessica," Felix said firmly, finally cutting her off. "I agree completely. Its why I'm not going to Nueva York either."

She stared at him for a long moment before slowly nodding. "Oh. Yeah. I… I get that."

"The others said it would be fine if I wanted to come back. It was my home. But that's the thing… it WAS my home. Not… not anymore." He ran his fingers through his hair and let out a long breath. "It wasn't my home for a long time. I had no one there anymore. After I lost Gabby I… I used to Society to try and avoid feeling things. And in the end it let me feel the wrong things. You said it, Jess… we don't work well together. We bring out the worst in each other."

He began to laugh.

"Its funny. The people that probably would be the best for me to reconnect with? They want nothing to do with me. I don't know what happened with Gwen or Miles… I never asked and was never told. But I've heard some things about Hobie and he seems to be doing well. Sometimes I think about reaching out to him, to find out what he's thinking. Get his advice; if he thinks an idea is stupid then it probably is, considering my track record. There are others… maybe one day I'll reach out to them. But I've made a new life for myself here.

"My therapist knows that I moved and that Felix isn't my real name. They aren't thrilled that I am avoiding being Miguel O'Hara-" Though they didn't know that as he didn't want to explain he was from another earth, "-so they are watching me closely, to make sure that I don't… I don't know… have a psychotic break and go all Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde."

That was only one of MANY things his shrink was watching him for. StarkLink had great insurance AND understood Rapture. On the Earth he now lived on Alchemax had long been taken down by his counterpart and the Rapture Epidemic had been researched heavily by those that had swooped in to take their place. Felix had gone through the process of cleaning out his system, his Spider-Powers not even causing them to bat an eye considering so many people on this world got 'spliced' to deal with other conditions. He was clean of Rapture and thus was able to be on the anti-depressants that he needed to be to keep himself on a more even keel.

The bursts of anger? Gone. The melancholy? Gone. The trust issues? Not gone but they weren't all consuming. Being consumed by the past? Working on. Control freak issues? He found ways to cope.

It had meant going cold turkey on everyone. Lyla had been the hardest, as she had been his oldest friend… but Gabby had pointed out that Lyla in the end was programed to agree with him even if she didn't. It had taken weeks but Felix had finally been able to remove that and while she had been grateful for what he had done and not screamed in his face… she had told him she needed a break. StarkLink got her a LMD and she had left. He got the occasional email from her, so he knew she was safe but otherwise everyone was gone.

It hadn't hurt as much as he had expected which had been his first clue of how fucked up he truly was.

"So no," he finally said, "I'm not going back either. I don't know if I will ever go back. And… I'm okay with that. I'm okay with it."

They didn't chat much after that. There was no need. They hadn't been friends, Felix knew that. And it didn't bother him like it should have.

He was just finishing with scheduling another therapy session with Dr. Reinhart when Harry popped her head into the office.

"Hey, I know you have to leave soon but its Claire's birthday-"

"Crap, did I give you money for the cake?"

"You did," she assured him with a grin. "Come on, we're going to surprise her!"

Felix nodded and headed out of his office, putting Jessica, the Society, and all of that out of his mind.

He wouldn't think about them again for a long while.