Vignette Summary: After Grossberg finds out about Mia and Diego's relationship, he asks to meet with them in his office.
Tags: Humor/Slice of Life
Word Count: 1,430
Date: Monday, March 18th, 2013
Time: 10:07 am
Location: Diego's Office, Grossberg Law Offices, Los Tokyo
"Hammond just couldn't help himself, could he?" Diego remarked as he shut his office door firmly behind him.
The Grossberg Law Offices team had just finished another Monday morning meeting, and, at the beginning of said meeting, Robert Hammond had outed Mia and Diego's relationship in front of the whole firm. Well, in front of Mr. Grossberg, that is.
Everyone else in the office had put two and two together sometime between their first date after the Fawles trial and their first week working on the Hawthorne file together. Diego drove Mia to work every morning, the pair ate lunch together frequently, and he and Mia seemed to chat in his office an awful lot. Add in the fact that they were two equally attractive and ambitious 20-somethings, and there were no doubts in anyone's minds.
Mr. Grossberg, however, had not thought about it one bit until this morning. He made a point of avoiding the personal matters of his staff and, even if he paid more attention to their goings-on, he was prone to forget about most gossip the second he heard it. When Hammond teasingly addressed them as Mr. and Mrs. Armando though, and they were unable to suppress their shock and discomfort, Mr. Grossberg finally took notice.
Mia sighed. "Apparently not. He's never been my favorite person but, somehow, he just sunk even lower."
"He's just bitter."
"About what?"
"My win rate being higher than his. That we're dating."
"Why would he care that we're dating?"
Diego scoffed. "Didn't you tell me he hit on you when you first started here?"
"Yes, but I had intentionally blocked out that memory."
"Well, I haven't. If we didn't work together, he and I would have had some strong words by now."
"Down, boy. He hasn't again, and if he does, I can handle it."
"Hm." Even though they were strictly talking in hypotheticals, Diego took it as a point of pride to be the one to defend her honor.
"Anyway," Mia continued. "Maybe Mr. Grossberg still doesn't know."
"You think?"
"It's possible. If we weren't together, that joke would be even more uncomfortable, and our reactions would make just as much sense."
"That's true. Here's hoping you're right."
There was a rap on the door.
"Diego, my boy! It's Mr. Grossberg!"
"Speak of the devil," Diego muttered. "You can come in!" he called back.
Mr. Grossberg opened the door and, upon catching a glimpse of Mia in his peripheral vision, instinctively averted his eyes, before covering them with his hands.
"S-sir," Mia said. "Are you okay?"
Realizing his folly, Mr. Grossberg lowered his hands and looked at her directly. He cleared his throat. "Yes, uh, it's nothing. I'm happy you're here. Well, um, rather, it'll save me a trip downstairs. I'd like to meet with you both in my office. Ten minutes?"
"No problem," Diego agreed. "What's it regarding?"
"We'll discuss it all then." Mr. Grossberg nodded to them both before exiting and shutting the door. Seconds later, he returned, opening the door as wide as it would go and then walking back to his office.
Once Mr. Grossberg was out of earshot, Diego laughed. "I'd say he knows."
"Yep." Mia shook her head in disbelief. "Did he seriously think I walked out of our meeting and disrobed in your office, less than five minutes later? And, if I had, that you would open the door for him?"
"I think that's exactly what he thought. Unfortunately, he was wrong."
Mia gently punched him in the arm.
"Kitten, it's a compliment!"
They met Mr. Grossberg in his office, at the agreed upon time, for a closed-door meeting. While he had each of them sit in the guest chairs directly across from his desk, he addressed them on foot, standing and pacing.
"Thank you for meeting with me," Mr. Grossberg began. "An anonymous source has brought to my attention –"
"Robert," Diego corrected.
"An anonymous source," Mr. Grossberg stated again. "That you have begun a… romantic… relationship." He looked at them expectantly, and they both nodded. "How long has this been going on?"
The pair looked at each other, trying to decide who should speak.
"About a month," Mia finally said.
"I see; I see." Grossberg paced some more. "And this is… a real relationship? Not a… um… well –"
"Yes, we're together," Diego said, putting everyone's misery to an end. He and Mia didn't need to hear the words "friends with benefits" or "one night stand" come out of their boss's mouth.
"Okay." Mr. Grossberg turned to Mia. "Mia, I know you're still quite new to the firm. That you're trying to build your career."
"Yes, I'm really happy to be here and hope to keep growing my skills as an attorney."
"Of course. I just want to make sure that you haven't been… coerced into this arrangement under false pretenses."
Diego rolled his eyes. "Good God."
Mia shook her head. "Surprisingly, no. There has been no coercion."
Diego shot her a dirty look, but Mia kept looking straight ahead at Mr. Grossberg, trying her best not to laugh.
"Okay, I trust that you are being forthcoming. You are one of our rising stars here, and I'd hate for a troubling experience to hinder your progress. There is a term that I'm sure you're familiar with, given our profession: quid pro quo sexual harassment. You see –"
Mia cut him off. "No, it's really not like that. I promise."
"Good, good. Well, if you ever need to talk privately, I'm here or you can reach out to HR for support."
"To Tom in HR?" she asked.
"Yes, exactly."
The couple gave each other a knowing look. Tom got drunk at the last holiday party and unloaded all his recent divorce baggage onto Mia before desperately asking her out. Diego was nearby at the time, people-watching, and had borne witness to that pathetic display.
Unlike Hammond, who was another divorced man with kids, about 20 years Mia's senior, Diego wasn't prepared to go to blows with Tom if he acted up again. He was a little too sad to worry about.
In reality, Diego didn't have any competition at the firm anyway. First and foremost, Mia didn't have a wandering eye. Secondly, he was the only one who had the right combination of youth, cocksureness, and persistence to flirt with the prettiest girl in the office on her first day and have her consider it. Even then, it still took Mia four months to be convinced and required the toning down of some of his arrogant impulses to chase that riddle to its end.
"Thank you, sir," Mia simply replied. She wasn't prepared to open that can of worms.
Mr. Grossberg turned to Diego. "Now, Diego."
"Yes, sir?"
Mr. Grossberg took a deep breath. "I'm very disappointed in you."
"Here we go."
"My hemorrhoids were acting up this morning, and I should have known that something was amiss."
"Sir, please –"
"My hemorrhoids are never wrong!" he declared. "The last time I had a flare-up this bad, you and I were in this very office, trying to disentangle the mess from your last relationship at this firm."
About a year earlier, Diego had broken off a brief, but terrible, relationship with a former client of his who had pursued him zealously for weeks after her successful criminal trial. As revenge, she filed a civil suit against him and the firm. Luckily, it had been dismissed prior to trial, without a settlement required, and ruled as lacking merit. Mr. Grossberg didn't remember much, but he did remember that whole affair.
"It's not like that," Diego insisted. "I actually like Mia."
"No matter. The last time, we moved past it, given your success here and the case's dismissal. If this relationship becomes a repeat offense, your win record will not be enough to save you. Do I make myself clear?"
Diego moved his tongue around his mouth, all but biting it. "Understood."
"Good." Mr. Grossberg sat down and leaned back in his expensive brown leather chair. He retrieved a glass dish from his top desk drawer and offered it to them. "Candy?"
Both shook their heads and politely declined.
"No?" Mr. Grossberg grabbed a piece, unwrapped it, and popped it into his mouth. "These are my favorite. Lemon drops." He exhaled wistfully. "They remind me of my youth." He sucked on the candy for a few seconds, before looking at them quizzically. "You both may leave now."