"What is going on here?" He demanded gently. "Shobha...?"

"Arun has a gift... From Ulmo.." she began, unsure how to approach the conversation after the sudden revelation. "He noticed it... Some time ago -"

"So the troughs in the laundry?" Thorin instantly connected the incident, realising he should have questioned how two four year old lads could have tipped over several large laundry bags with no help.

"I think so..."

"And the baths?"

"Quite possibly..." She admitted watching him as he processed it silently for a while before looking at the flaming ball that had almost completely set in the horizon now.

The thought finally crossed her mind that there was every chance he would want nothing more to do with her once she told him about Ulmo, and perhaps this was the last beautiful sunset they would share together.

A cool breeze whistled past her, making her shiver a little, and causing a few tendrils of her long, dark hair to dance along its direction.

"You are cold, my lady," he whispered, as she felt his heavy coat land on her shoulders. Instinctively she wrapped herself in it, enjoying his familiar scent of pipe-tobacco and vetiver. "We cannot remain here for long. I will need to have the guards sign an oath to protect Arun and keep what they witnessed silent, for his own safety. So I need to know, all you know about this now..."

"Thorin... his ability to control water is a gift from Ulmo..." She turned to look at her husband, nervous about how she would tell him.

"The mark you bear on your skin... So vivid... And Arun too..." Thorin began to place the puzzle together. "Ulmo saved you that day when you were plunged into the lake... But what of Arun?"

"Thorin... I didn't know that day but when I fell into the lake, I was pregnant after the night...we spent together..."

"In Laketown before we set off for the Mountain. Aye." He recalled that night of passion well. It was also then he placed a courting braid in her hair.

"And after saving me, he also chose for me to... carry his child... His son..." She finally revealed with a sigh. It had been such a burden to bear for so long, in some ways it was a relief to finally let him know.

His usually stony face shifted from anger to betrayal.

"So you lay with the Lord of Waters...?"

"No! Nothing like that! Biologically Arun is as much our child as Ulmo's, since I only had sex with you," she attempted to explain as best as she could, but in truth even she didn't fully understand it. "I guess part of his spirit or his soul belongs to the Ulmo... But both our Sons seem to have special powers."

She reached out to touch his chest, but he took a step back, looking at her as though she were no longer his wife but a complete stranger.

"I mean have you not noticed that Thrain can communicate with animals - especially the ravens...?"

"Tell me .. how long have you known this?" He asked coldly. "Or rather how long have you kept this secret from me...?"

"It's only been a few months since I became aware of his gift..."

"No. How long have you known Ulmo to be the father?"

"I... Since... Maybe around the time of the birth... Or thereabouts..." she admitted, in truth she couldn't recall specifically when she discovered this, other than knowing for sure after going into labour.

"You share dreams with the Valar - do you still dream of the great Lord Ulmo?" His words were cold and clinical now.

"Yes..." she replied quietly. "But it's not what you think - I only talk to him..."

"You ONLY talk? Well apparently that is quite enough to bear anothers child," Thorin spat out bitterly. "Very well then, tell me, do you harbour feelings for our Great Lord of the Waters, with whom you share a secret child?"

"I... No!" She frowned, tears finally filling her big brown eyes as she tried to take another step towards him, only for him to take yet another step back. "How could you ask me that? Have I not been faithful to you all these years? Haven't I left my entire life, family and everything to be with you? I agreed to help protect you, Fili and Kili, on your quest - but I stayed here for YOU Thorin!"

"But that's just it isn't it?" He suddenly stepped towards her to whisper low in her ear. "You HAVENT been faithful to me apparently..."

She began to sob quietly as he carried on.

"You bore a child that belongs to another, and kept it a secret - cuckolded me! Me: King under the Mountain!" He hissed in her ear. "I could forgive the admirers - Imli, whom you kissed. Aye - do not think I have forgotten that. And Fili... My own sisters-son! It is of no fault of your own that they love you... Any male with half a brain and a pair of eyes would! But this... Is the greatest betrayal I have suffered."

"But the child is still ours! Please Thorin... WE made these babies... I didn't sleep with anyone else! It's some sort of Valar magic that has allowed this -"

"Even still," he growled. "You should have TOLD me!"

She turned to face him now, but he stepped away.

"I need to sort this out now. I have a duty to protect you and Arun." He began to walk away from her but she quickly caught up to him and clutched his hand. And while he stopped, he also pulled his hand away from her.

"Please be angry with me. Blame me. Punish ME - but Arun is still your flesh and blood - conceived by only you and me..." She pleaded. If he could grant her just one thing, this would be it. "Please don't treat him any differently."

He stared at her coldly for a moment, watching the hot tears roll down her cheeks as she quickly attempted to wipe them away, only to find new tears taking their place.

"Very well." He replied coldly. "And I will ensure that you are taken care of..."

"What does that mean?" She took his coat off and pressed it into his hands. "Is this it then? We are done just like that, because of something I had no control over?"

"You betrayed my trust." He hissed again pushing his coat back into her arms, frowning. She was cold and he was not an orc to deny her of the warmth of his coat. "It cannot all be so easily forgiven. I need time to think."

He pulled back from her, turning swiftly and carrying on, as she remained alone on the great stone bridge sobbing, silently, still holding onto his coat.

...

"My lady, you have given me the evening off for some nights now..." Lola frowned worried. "Is everything alright?"

"Yes, I have some work to do these evenings; Catching up on paperwork that has been long overdue," she smiled sounding as cheerful as she could muster given the circumstances. "I hope you have had a chance to rest..."

"Well, it's funny you should ask... But I bumped into the young soldier Hal the other evening at supper in the dining halls. And well, he's really rather funny... And pleasant..."

"Oh is that right?" Shobha mused trying to keep her tone normal so as not to raise any suspicion of a set up. "Well, he was very brave when we went into Greenwood..."

"Oh cut it out, Shobha - I know you and Mara planned it so that we met..." Lola narrowed her eyes, uncertainty clearly evident in her voice, despite the accusation.

"Nope. Have no clue what you mean." Shobha hurried. "So have you met him since...?"

"Well, he has been good company, truly." Lola admitted, a subtle blush creeping into her cheeks. "He is quite nice... But I guess it's still very early days."

"Of course. Well, off with you then. Because I need you back early in the morning." Shobha hinted. "You will have to help Thorin with the children at breakfast. But don't worry Dis, Fili and Dwalin will join you too..."

"You have now missed breakfast for some days now, Shobha..."

"Yes, I know. I owe the other healers the early shift after years of not doing it." She lied again.

The truth was that she had waited for Thorin, that evening, but he never returned to their bedroom. She had wanted to find him in his study, or at least make sure he was okay, but she had felt guilty about everything. And so had given him the space he so cleared needed. Eventually she had fallen asleep on the chaise in their parlour. But she too had arisen early and set about clearing out her desk, while she contemplated their future.

Ever since that night neither she nor Thorin had met or spoken, and neither had they slept in the same bed. He always sent excuses for supper, working late, and so she took his cue and left him to spend time with their children at breakfast, sending her apologies and accepting all the early shifts in the infirmary.

It had been a nice time to work, dressings changes had been quicker, wound inspections easier and patients had been more refreshed after a decent night's sleep.

She had also spent more time with Thorongil, who had begun to move about more freely, and she planned to move him into a guest suite in their wing, as their royal guest. Ironically he had been the first one suspicious of something awry about her. But it had been easy enough at that stage to brush it aside.

On the few occasions they had actually met, Thorin had remained cold and avoided as much conversation with her as possible. The exception had been when they had all met as a family, during which time he had kissed her in front of the children, in order to feign unity for their eyes. It had felt so awkward to her, that she had since avoided directly handing the children over to him to spend any time, sending them through Lola or Dis instead. She could only hope that Thorin would figure things out before their sons did.

"Well, I'm off then..." Lola hesitated by the door again. "Are you sure everything is alright, Shobha...? I am asking as your friend rather than your nanny."

"It's fine. Just a busy rut. Got me down a little, but when I get on top of my work eventually it'll get better." She reassured with a smile.

Tucking the children to bed after a story, she once again moved to her bureau in the corner of their parlour to finish signing off some of the parchments she had drawn up.

There was every chance Thorin would no longer want anything to do with her now. It was a little unreasonable not even giving her a second chance, but he was a proud dwarf and his ego had been wounded, and she should never have kept it a secret. It may take him a few days or decades to get over it, and she had no desire to remain in Erebor if it was the latter. So she had to plan to look after herself and her children now. This was not London.

The longer he froze her out, the more likely rumours would begin about Thorins dissatisfaction.

That would mean dams a plenty throwing their ample bosoms and behinds at him. And there was no need for their children to see him take a mistress.

For now she would wait patiently. Holi was around the corner, and then the spring market festival. But soon enough it would all be done, and her services as consort less needed.

That's when she needed an exit plan.

...

"Well that went terribly." She sighed looking out at the calm ocean. "And thanks for your support by the way. I really needed a shoulder..."

"I am sorry little one, but the last thing you needed was the one that caused trouble in your marriage." Ulmo had sat beside her for what felt like hours listening to her sorrows very patiently. "I offer my sincerest apologies for any trouble I have caused you..."

She seemed to be unable to cry in her dreams here, although she really wanted to. So she pulled her knees up under her chin again, hoping to make herself as small as possible.

"I could have seduced you..." He smirked attempting to make her laugh. "But I genuinely believed this to be the best course of action. And it was believed that with you carrying the child of the Valar, your fate would be safer..."

"The sad thing is for a moment, I believed if I had told him sooner, it would have been different. But he is angry with me about everything." She sighed again. "And he wanted time to think, but it's been almost a month and he doesn't even want to talk or yell at me. So I actually believe now that had I told him sooner it would have been EXACTLY the same."

She let herself fall back onto the golden, powder sand, to find the large Valar came to lay beside her, propping himself up on one elbow and watching her intently with his sea green eyes. They were calm and kind, and made her feel strangely at ease, almost like she had known him all her life. It was hard to deny at this point just how similar Arun's eyes were to Ulmo's.

"You cannot blame yourself for this..."

"No! You're right! I blame YOU for this!" She wanted to scream and cry but still nothing. It was getting frustrating. "I would hate you, if you had not been so kind to me..."

Finally her eyes began to well up, and Ulmo sat up, looking somewhat concerned.

"I am so alone right now... Don't you understand. I have friends I can trust but they are also connected to Thorin in some way, and I can't make them choose me over him, for their own sake!" Tears began streaming down her face, as if some sort of enchantment had been broken. "I mean they all have to live in Erebor. And my parents are so far away. I miss them so much - and I just want to go home now... I mean does time pass differently back home to here? Are they still even alive...?"

She let her head fall into her hands, feeling the hopelessness of this situation.

"How are you doing that?" He finally offered her a handkerchief materialised from somewhere unseen, and wrapped an arm around her gently. "How are you crying? I had enchanted you to fall asleep and be free of your anguish if just for a few hours; I have been troubled that you were not sleeping well."

She continued to sob into her handkerchief and then slowly her head lifted.

"Wait. Could you send me back?" She clutched at his chest.

"Not yet, you poor girl..." he gently stroked her hair, pulling her head against his large expanse of a chest. "You are spinning out of control - be patient for Thorin will see sense yet. But you have a task yet to complete here in Arda, it merely isn't apparent to you yet..."

"Haven't you all used me enough?" Her breath fell raggedly as her sobs slowly began to die away.

"Forgive me, but Dol Gul Dur will be destroyed soon. And the guardians of middle earth will see that the dark one has returned. How things move and change here is still undecided and cannot be seen clearly. And your arrival, has changed the course of history for many." He closed his eyes, whispering into her long dark hair as he stroked her face. "But I will not let you face it alone even if it is forbidden..."

Finally feeling entirely spent she remained still against his chest, resting in his arms.

"If I complete these tasks, will you promise to send me home?" She finally asked coming to some acceptance . "Me and our children. If they are needed in Arda, you can send them back when they are grown. But you have to promise me this. You owe it to me."

"And this is truly what you wish for...?" He gently lifted her chin up, so he could examine her face better. "You know I would give you anything you ask, although I cannot control another's heart."

"I think Thorins heart is made up. And so is mine." She concluded quietly. "So yes. Or I will take terrible risks that will put my life in danger. And once I am dead none of this will matter anymore..."

In that moment she felt hopeless enough to mean it.

"As you wish. Be patient and your tasks will become clear. They are not ones which will be straightforward, but only you have the power." He stroked her hair gently. "Now close your eyes and rest. I can at least grant you this much relief from your anguish."

"Okay. But please find me in my dreams more. I am so alone and lost here right now..." she mumbled as she finally found exhaustion enough to fall asleep, in his arms as he watched on, pitying her for all that she had been through and for what he imagined was to come.

...

"Look I am sorry to ask a favour like this.. but I need to know how much money I have and how to organise myself if I ever travelled outside of Erebor." She finally broached the subject she had been dancing around over dinner.

"Mama... num num..." Seraeya happily gurgled in her high chair as she picked at her mash with her hands.

"Gloin will organise anything for you. Just say the word -"

"Now Mara..." Gloin hesitated, ever the cheapskate.

"Oh shush! It's not Thorins money. Technically a fifteenth share belongs to her -"

"No. Our lady gave that money for Ered Mithrin and Dale in their building projects..." Gloin corrected his wife again, nervously.

"She still has ample in the bank -"

"I would need to check absolutely." Gloin repeated.

"Then I will give her whatever she falls short on. And you can pay me back..."

Shobha remained silent at the offer. There was every chance it was a one way trip.

"Gloin. Will you deal with the dishes please?" Mara handed him a stack of empty plates before shuffling seats along the table towards Shobha and her daughter. "And leave us girls to talk."

She gently mopped Seraeyas mouth as Shobha cleared up the mess the little girl had made.

"Thank you again for inviting me to dinner -"

"Nonsense. You two shouldn't be alone," Mara sighed again, unhappy about having to open up on a subject she worried was mere viscious rumour. "My dear, I must ask, what is going on with you and Thorin. Your schedules are too busy to meet, and it has been a whole month with no public events together and Aida has noticed you haven't taken a weekend off together in over six weeks. Is this true? Or is she just senile. Because she is spreading her venomous words around..."

"No. Mara, it's... true..."

"Oh Mahal! I knew he would Khakhf it up eventually. He's a stubborn bastard. Even if he is our King -"

"I think it's also my fault, Mara." She replied in defeat, although she felt certain she deserved better than how he had continued to treat her. "You know I love you right Mara, but I don't want to talk about it. And he is really upset with me, so I don't know whether we will be okay anymore."

"Oh dear girl, if anyone can melt him, it's you. I mean I do not even know whether he would ever look at another female again..."

"Mara, all I can say is that I don't think I can tolerate this any more..." She took a sip of her water in an attempt to calm herself and keep from crying.

"Very well, Shobha, you keep it together. Looking at the two of you, it's hard to see any change, other than you both being busy." Mara spoke firmly. She knew how to manage these viscious dams, and she would hold them back for this woman she had quickly grown to consider a dear friend, so much so that she had been present for the birth of Shobha's daughter. And in their custom, being present at the labour of a Queen was one of greatest honours bestowed upon a noble-dam. "I will deflect these rumours; I know all the people who can help, and the servants all hold their tongues when it comes to you because you have been so generous. Tell me what else I need to do?"

"When the time comes, I will need help to travel with the children. You are best I know at organising these things..." She admitted. "But I hate to ask and put you in a difficult position -"

"Don't be silly, lass. I will do all that and more. And do not worry about Gloin. He is loyal to the King, but he is also fond of you, and he will help."

...

"Och! Whats eatin ya?" Dwalin grumbled as Thorin sighed again inspecting the newly made weapons. "Ye look like ye've not been sleepin, and frankly quite miserable...?"

"I don't like the underhanded attempts by the Iron Hills Lords to muscle out our allies." Thorin grumbled tossing another axe into a pile that needed sharpening. "I rule under the Arkenstone. Does loyalty mean nothing to this filth?"

"Aye Thorin! But yer donnae need ter take it out on the weapons. Those last two were fine."

"We can't afford to have fine! We must have the best." Thorin snapped again. The truth was he hated feeling this way about her. But he felt hurt by her revelation, even if she had no control over the matter indeed. And yet, he saw how Imli and Fili fawned over her, and it made him jealous. "If we can't catch them in the act, we must beat them at their own game."

"Thorin, the smiths are working at their fullest capacity. These are the best weapons we can forge -"

Thorin groaned again and waived the next lot of weapons away.

"Very well then, have the shipment sent out. But on your head be it if they are found to be poor."

"Och no! This is not ye. Is it the bairns?" Dwalin frowned genuinely concerned. "Are ye not getting yer fill of the Princess?"

He waggled his eyebrows hoping to get a reaction, but only found a sour look on his friends face.

"No it's fine. I must focus Dwalin."

"It's most certainly not fine. And if ye donnae tell me I will ask me little sister!" Dwalin snapped back.

"Ask her for all I care." Thorin began to walk away, hoping his friend would not go to his wife after all.

"Thorin! Ye stubborn thickheaded fool!" Dwalin called after him as he remained in the smiths halls with the cases of weapons and the dwarves ready to seal the crates. "Ye deal with it right away, before it eats at yer both!"

...

Dear All,

quick upload of chapter sorry for any typos…

Xiaiel - its all catching up with her now :(