"I feel better about things now," Xander decided and everyone just turned and stared at him.
"Seriously?" Cordelia asked in disbelief.
"Yeah, I can see why vampires are scared of me now," he replied with a nod. "That was bugging me."
"And we aren't going to talk about you eating vampires?" Angel asked.
"I've brushed my teeth since then," Xander said dryly.
"I don't think that's the problem," Doyle offered.
"Then what's the problem?" Xander asked.
"You, while seriously injured, overpowered and drained three vampires like you were popping skittles," Cordelia said. "How?"
"I was once possessed by a primal spirit," Xander reminded them and fell silent.
"That's all you're going to say?" Angel asked after a minute of confused silence.
"That's not enough?" Xander asked, confused. "I mean, I get why Doyle might be in the dark, but you two were with me in Sunnydale when I was possessed and helped deal with Oz."
"Xander… we don't have your knowledge of the subject of primals and werewolves," Angel admitted, sounding like it pained him to say it.
"Oh," Xander said. "I figured you guys would have read up on that stuff. I mean, primals, lycanthropes, the swim team, the Jekyll and Hyde formula," he listed off, "it's all connected."
Angel and Cordelia exchanged confused looks while Doyle just stared at him in disbelief.
"Seriously? You don't get it?" Xander asked, surprised.
"Something about… animals?" Cordelia guessed.
"Humans started as animals," Xander said, "and evolution builds on what's there, discarding nothing. Inside of every human is a dangerous animal at the core which sometimes breaks loose."
"And having been possessed you are more in touch with it," Angel guessed.
"Then why don't you use it more often?" Cordelia asked.
"This is about little old ladies lifting cars off toddlers, isn't it?" Doyle asked before he could respond.
"Because it's a dangerous idiot and partially," Xander told them. "The animal doesn't care about much beyond itself and what it wants in the moment with no care for the consequences. It's faster because it doesn't ever pause to think and it's stronger because it doesn't care if it injures itself, it only cares about the now."
"And you can just flip out and start ripping out throats whenever you want?" Cordelia asked doubtfully.
"No, anyone can," Xander said, "humans are dangerous."
"I don't think it's that easy," Angel disagreed.
"I never said it was easy, I said it was possible," Xander replied. "If you haven't gone through something that puts you in contact with that piece of yourself, it'd take a pretty extreme situation for you to find it, but trust me, it's there."
"And pushed to the edge of death it came out, vampire blood healing all the damage you did to your body when it drained the fledges," Angel said.
"Mostly healed," Xander said, "I was still limping, bruised, and sore, but all the life threatening injuries were gone."
"And you're okay with… flipping out and draining them?" Cordelia asked.
"They're vampires," Xander said flatly.
"Isn't vampire blood supposed to be addictive and put you under the control of the vampire whose blood it was?" Doyle asked.
"As far as I know," Angel agreed.
"They didn't live long enough to give me orders and the rush of vampire blood probably feels a lot like letting loose, so no change there," Xander explained.
"And the withdrawals are probably similar," Angel guessed.
"Probably," Xander agreed unconcerned. "I spent a whole lotta time reading up on it and figuring out how to keep it from coming out, but not a whole lot on becoming a blood ghoul, so I don't know."
"Not important now, just something to keep in mind," Angel decided. "There have been a fair amount of vampire hunters who became addicted and were enslaved to Master vampires to guard them while they slept."
Xander nodded. "Except for those three… and however many I may have run into on the way to the hospital, I haven't drank any more so I'm good."
"Good," Angel said, relieved.
"The way you and Willow were acting wasn't normal," Doyle said. "I'm not an expert in magic, but your body language was pretty easy to read and it really didn't fit the situation you were in."
"It was Sunnydale and years ago," Xander said, waving it off. "My knee jerk reaction is to blame the Mayor, so that's what I'm going to do."
"The Mayor?" Doyle asked.
"He bugged the library where we met up every night and did a number of skeevy things to keep us distracted and arguing among ourselves," Xander replied with a shrug, "not all of it was obvious. But like I said, it was years ago so it doesn't really matter except to remind me to study up on mind protection spells."
"That's probably something we should look into as well," Angel said. "There are way too many demons that attack the mind."
"If I come across something you can use I'll let you know," Xander said, "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have more of Hollywood to see before I hit the road."
"Have fun," Angel said as Xander left.
"You okay?" Doyle asked Cordelia.
"Not really," she replied. "Things were more screwed up in Sunnydale than I realized and looking back on it I can see how easily we were manipulated and it…"
Angel nodded.
"Want to get drunk and make bad decisions with me?" Doyle offered, waggling his eyebrows.
Cordelia rolled her eyes. "You can't get me that drunk."
"I can try, just give me a chance," he said with a smirk that reminded her of Xander.
She snickered. "Fine, but you're buying. Come on you goofball."
The pair left and Angel smiled, pleased Doyle had cheered her up. He walked into his office and picked up the phone, dialing the mage's number. "Hello John? I got the tape. I watched it to make sure, it's the real thing… Yeah, just get here when you can and I'll give it to you."
0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0
Xander found himself at the Lux once more.
He really plays the hell out of that piano," Xander told Maze. "Coke, please."
Maze fixed him a Coke. "That he does," she agreed.
"You look familiar," a female voice said and Xander turned to find a dark haired young woman in a black leather jacket who fit in better than he did.
"I have that kind of face," Xander replied.
"No, I'm sure I've seen you somewhere," she said with a frown.
"Doubtful, I only got here recently," Xander replied.
"What's your name?" she asked.
"What's yours?" he replied, wondering why she was being so pushy.
"Chloe Decker, LAPD," she said, eyes narrowed as she looked him over. "I know I've seen you… recently."
"Alexander Harris," he said and waited for her response.
She frowned. "Doesn't sound familiar."
"Problem?" Lucifer asked, inserting himself into the conversation.
"She recognized my face but doesn't know where from," Xander replied.
"She's probably assuming it was in connection to a crime," Lucifer pointed out.
"That would explain the tone," Xander agreed, "very demanding, but to be fair I gave her my name and still nothing."
"Strange, she normally has a very good memory," Lucifer said amused.
"Are you going to help me or not?" Chloe demanded.
"I would, but I don't know where you saw his face either and he did give you his name," Lucifer told her.
"Do you know where I would have seen your face?" she asked Xander, a little frustration in her voice, but trying to be polite.
"Did your precinct get a copy of a lecture on how to identify and stake vampires?" Xander asked, deciding to be nice, since she was making an effort.
"Yes, but I haven't seen it yet," she replied. "It's scheduled for tomorrow during the morning shift."
"Oh," Xander said with a frown. "Well I'm the one giving the lecture on it. I'm not sure where you'd have seen me otherwise."
"You're a vampire hunter?" she asked.
"Yeah," Xander agreed, "but except for police lectures I don't know where you would have seen me, I'm not exactly a celebrity or anything."
Chloe's face lit up in understanding. "That's it!" she said, snapping her fingers.
"What is?" Xander asked.
"I saw you on Entertainment Tonight or one of those celebrity gossip shows my babysitter was watching," she replied.
"You're a celebrity?" Lucifer asked Xander.
"Not that I know of," Xander said, "must be a lookalike."
"Paparazzi caught photos of you on The Walk of Fame walking hand in hand with Wonder Woman," Chloe explained.
"Oh, yeah, that's me," Xander said. "Damn, maybe I really should get a spandex outfit and a mask."
"That was the date you were waiting for last night?" Lucifer asked.
"Yeah," Xander agreed.
"That's why you're moving so stiffly," Maze realized. "I thought you'd been in a fight."
"How could a date… never mind," Chloe said, embarrassed.
"Damn, I really hope my friends didn't see that," Xander said.
"Worried about your reputation?" Chloe asked doubtfully.
"No, but Buffy and Willow always find ways to bitch about whoever I date," Xander said.
"I'd say there is little to complain about, but mortal women…" Lucifer said with a melodramatic sigh only to catch an elbow from Chloe.
"There's always something," Xander said, ignoring Lucifer's flirting with the detective. "Ampata had to drain the life force of people to survive, Miss French turned into a giant praying mantis and wanted to eat me, Faith tried to strangle me, Cordelia created an alternate timeline where I was turned into a vampire, Anyanka who granted that wish spent most of the evening talking about the men she'd cursed-"
"You have not a single speck of survival instinct," Lucifer interrupted. "Are you sure your last name isn't Constantine?"
"Still Harris," Xander said. "Unlike him, I actually know what an iron looks like."
"Have you upset a goddess of love at some point?" Maze asked, amused.
Xander winced. "I may have upset Aphrodite at some point… and Artemis, probably Hecate," he admitted. "However, Diana said that as far as she knows they don't have it in for me and things have gotten better since I left Sunnydale. Though Diana is more a friends with benefits right now as she insists on nothing serious until we've known each other for at least a decade and Dawn I'm making wait until she's older."
"I can see why your friends are suspicious," Chloe said. "Suddenly my dating choices don't seem so bad… for the most part."
Lucifer smirked, clearly amused.
"I'm going to blame the Hellmouth," Xander decided, "or the Mayor, I like blaming him for things."
"Except for the occasional kidnapping attempt by her enemies I think you'll find very little to complain about while dating Diana," Lucifer said, "she's very honest and straightforward not to mention being a warrior like yourself."
"Huh, I wonder if Barbara tracked me down to kidnap me, that would explain how I ran into her at the Oakland zoo," Xander said.
"Her enemies are already gunning for you?" Chloe asked.
"Possibly," Xander said with a thoughtful frown. "The odds of running into me on accident are pretty slim, she may have smelled Diana on me."
"Smelled her on you?" Chloe asked, raising an eyebrow.
"Barbara is a were-cheetah," Xander said, "she has an enhanced sense of smell."
"You ran into Cheetah," Chloe said, realizing who he meant.
"Yeah, nice girl, good sense of humor," Xander said.
"She's eaten people," Chloe pointed out.
"No one's perfect," Xander said with a frown, not liking hearing people take potshots at the poor woman.
"The fact that you're still alive is proof that there is a god," Chloe said dryly.
"I could have told you that," Lucifer said.
Typing By: Abyssal Angel
Beta By: Abyssal Angel and Mist of Shadows
AlphaWolfll - Omake
I wanted to extrapolate what Darwin could maybe have written.
March 17th, 1879
Three months since the bite, I am beginning to comprehend the transformation. My body heals unnaturally fast; my senses are heightened. The full moon brings an uncontrollable beast within. Yet, I believe control is possible. I must document everything.
April 5th, 1879
The wolf is not a separate entity but an awakened part of me. Its urges to fight, hunt, and dominate are primal instincts present in all creatures. Lycanthropy is not a curse alone, but a return to something ancient. I am determined to find balance.
April 12th, 1879
I have begun experimenting with breathwork to manage the transformation. Slow, deliberate breaths—four seconds in, hold, and out—help delay the change. The wolf responds to fear and anger; calmness is key. This is not a cure, but a promising technique. I have found a pranayama Teacher, their breath techniques might come in useful or at least give me further insight.
April 24th, 1879
Meditation has become a vital practice. By focusing solely on my breath, I still my mind and slow the wolf's emergence. The wolf does not act from malice but fear, responding to perceived threats. Calmness keeps it at bay, allowing me moments of control.
May 6th, 1879
I have added mental imagery to my techniques. I visualize a fortress within my mind, keeping the wolf outside. This practice strengthens my resolve during transformations, allowing me to regain control even when the beast begins to surface. Using a form of Method of Loci and Mantras.
May 15th, 1879
Silver burns my skin and weakens the beast. Contact with it suppresses the wolf's strength and influence, making control easier. Painful, yet effective, I now wear silver bands to keep the wolf subdued. It is a crude but invaluable tool.
June 3rd, 1879
Herbs like wolfsbane, sage, and St. John's Wort show promise. Wolfsbane dulls the wolf's violent urges, while sage calms the mind, and St. John's Wort tempers emotional instability. These tools help me face the transformation with a clearer head. Other herbs that have been recommended to me. Valerian Root taken as a tea is known to Calm nerves and reduces anxiety. Lavender either Burned or applied as oil has a calming scent. Chamomile Taken as tea, it reduces the physical tension before the transformation. Mugwort is traditionally associated with lucid dreams, use as a tincture or tea before meditation.
July 14th, 1879
Minerals like hematite and obsidian aid in grounding and protection. Hematite, a stone known for its grounding properties, seems to hold the most promise, able to stabilizes my emotions, while obsidian acts as a mental shield during transformations, associated with protection and the warding off of negative energies. Combined with my other methods, these provide precious moments of clarity and control. Other Minerals such as Amethyst known for its calming energy, and Tiger's Eye known as a stone with balanced Energy. I have yet to experiment with them personally. Other minerals i have taken note of, Lapis Lazuli is known to increase internal Awareness, Selenite is known for its cleansing properties.
August 7th, 1879
Combining silver, herbs, minerals, and meditation has become my most effective strategy. Though the pain of silver is great, it, along with my mental practices, allows me to guide the transformation rather than be consumed by it. It is a fragile but workable mastery. I shall travel to see if i may find better understanding of my currently crude method of control.
July 28th, 1880
The wolf and I are not enemies but one being. The key to survival is not resistance but understanding. With discipline and acceptance, the wolf can be tamed. This condition, while a curse, offers great strength if approached with wisdom and perseverance.
August 15th, 1880
I now exist as both man and wolf, balanced. To those who find this journal, know that you are not alone. Cautiously and steadily embrace your nature, and you will discover strength and control. The battle can be won, but only with understanding and resolve.
—Charles Darwin
RUGoing2writethat - Omake: It's always about the Blood
So, I was thinking, what if Giles, Buffy, and Willow watched the Beta tapes, with Xander, because of course Giles would have a Betamax player, one he is very protective of and a collection he's proud of, which Dru possibly knew about. This is after watching the tapes, which were a bit more detailed as they were captured on another camera.
Willow and Buffy were stunned to say the least.
"Bloody fucking flying arse monkeys Xander!" stated Giles.
Everyone turned to him in shock at his cursing like that.
"Ahem, yes, well, after seeing that, I mean come on. You bit, drained and dusted three Vampires. Do you know what Vampire blood does to a living human?"
Xander looked at Giles and said, "Um...no?"
Giles walked into his bedroom and came back with a large tome, flipping through the pages, "And right here. In the year 604 AD, while wandering through Rome, looking for the next slayer, having lost mine recently, I came across a young man of about 18 years of age. I sensed the potential in him, the magic in him was weak but I decided to nurture it as we Watchers are not powerful wizards. He had a young sister of about 10 years of age whom he dearly and truly loved. He came with me, leaving his mother, father, and young sister and we wandered until we came upon the slayer. I took the Slayer under my wing, the young man also learning the fighting arts from me alongside the new slayer. We got word of a Vampire back in Rome and made haste. We arrived at his family home to find a Vampire draining the last of his sister. The Vampire was his recently turned father. Standing behind him was another vampire, his mother. And behind them was their sire, Junia Cassius, a master vampire known for her cruelty toward families. The young man so enraged by seeing his sister die, let out a burst of magic, stunning the vampires, and leapt upon them. Before he could be stopped, he'd bitten, drained and dusted all three in quick succession, an event that had never happened before. Over the next few years, he continued to fight and train with us, and was as strong and fast as the slayer; his healing factor was slower but unless a blow was mortal, he could recover within a day or two. He became a terror, destroying every Vampire he could. Eventually, he left us, joined the Cult of the Christians, and continued his fight. I saw him again, 40 years later, and he hadn't aged a day. - Journal of Quintus Drusus, Watcher of Ancient Rome in the 600s."
They all let what they heard sink in. Giles cleared his throat.
"The young man finally died at the age of about 318 or so years old. It is theorized that the vampire blood granted him such a long life and a healing factor almost equal to the slayer's. During his life, it is estimated he dusted about 500 to 1000 vampires but we cannot be sure as records from that era are sketchy. Xander, technically, you are now a Dhampir, a human-vampire hybrid. I'd like to run some tests and cast some spells if you don't mind."
Xander looked at Giles, "What kind of spells and tests?"
"The kind we use to identify if a young girl is a slayer or a vampire."
Xander nodded. Giles took an amulet out of his shirt and spoke a few words that sounded German, ending with a word that sounded like the color blue turned backwards. Xander glowed yellow for a few seconds.
Giles nodded and then he handed Xander a metal rod. "Try to bend it if you will."
Xander easily bent the rod. Giles nodded again.
"That confirms it, you are a Dhampir. Essentially, you are equal to the Slayer in speed and strength."
Xander nodded.
"I have no idea what would happen if you bit and drained another vampire. Dhampirs only ever drain three."
They looked at Giles.
"The young man in the Journal was the first ever Dhampir but not the last. Several times, young men have done the same. Oddly enough, it's always those who are potential watchers and always men. In 888, a Watcher had a young woman he was training to be a watcher drink three Vampires he'd stunned and bound. She died within seconds. We don't know why but the hypothesis is that because Slayers are always women, Dhampirs are their counterpart and are always male and always compelled to hunt and destroy Vampires."
Xander nodded. It made sense. "Wait, so does that mean that I was a potential Dhampir the same way there are potential Slayers?"
Giles smiled and nodded, "Yes, the same way you were a potential Watcher. It's why you took to languages so quickly. I know you hide it, but I know you can read some ancient languages fluently. It's a Watcher trait. We don't just train to speak and read ancient languages, we have a natural gift for them, for all languages really."
Xander nodded. He really needed time to think.
"Why don't you get back to your vacation? Going to Central City would give you time to think and deal with what you've learned, as well as giving Buffy and Willow time to mellow out and come to terms with this as well."
Xander look at Giles. "I was in the room when Dawn called you and heard her side of things."
Xander nodded as he headed out to his car.