Episode 6: Sharon's Birthday Problem
Toolshed and Shelly enter the barracks where Randy and Towelie are.
Randy: There you kids are. I need to talk with you about something.
Toolshed: What is it, Dad?
Randy: Your mom's birthday is tomorrow and we need to give her a gift. So any ideas for a gift?
Shelly: All of the good gifts are back on Earth.
Randy: I know, but I'm talking about a gift from Space. A gift that your mother would actually like.
Toolshed: Well, we could give her a card that says Happy Birthday.
Randy: No Stan. Something less original.
Shelly: How about a Diamond necklace?
Randy: I said something original! But I could throw her a Tegridy style birthday party.
Toolshed: Dad, she's not gonna want that. She hates your weed.
Randy: You don't know that! Maybe she wants a part like this! Don't worry, Kids. We're gonna throw your mother the best birthday ever.
At Room 16, which is the Freedom Pals room...
The Coon: So tomorrow's your mom's birthday?
Toolshed: Yes, but I don't know what I should get her. All the gifts I planned on getting her are back on Earth.
Call Girl: Well, Toolshed. What have you had in mind?
Toolshed: I don't know. But I'll think of something soon.
Mysterion: Try a breakfast in bed.
Toolshed: Really?
Human Kite: Yeah. I made my mom breakfast in bed in her last birthday.
Toolshed: Awesome. Thanks, Guys.
Human Kite: You're welcome.
The Coon: Or you could try taking her to a planet that she might like.
Toolshed: What planet does she like?
The Coon: Well, there is a planet called Wash World. It's a planet filled with amusement parks. I went there yesterday with my mom. Although the people are water elemental people, I still had a fun time.
Toolshed: Well, where is it?
The Coon: It's like 10 miles from here.
Toolshed: I might think about it. Good suggestion tho.
Call Girl: I hope your mom has the best birthday ever.
Toolshed: Thanks, Call Girl.
Call Girl: You're welcome, Boo.
Toolshed blushes.
With Sharon, she is walking down the hallway.
Sharon: I wonder what I should do for my birthday tomorrow.
Randy: Hey, Honey. Do you want to look at something with me?
Sharon: Is it another one of your plans to sell weed to everybody in space?
Randy: No. It's something else. Come on.
Sharon: Well, okay...
(Play Our Last Summer by ABBA for this section and skip to 1:57.)
Randy is currently showing Sharon a slideshow of all the times they celebrated her birthday while they are married. He then showed their moments from the South Park series, such as the time they did White People Renovating Houses, and that time they ran from giant Guinea pigs, and another time where they owned a video store on Halloween.
Randy: Like this slideshow, Sharon?
Sharon: How long did it take for you to make this?
Randy: A week. Oh look, here's our favorite part! (He then shows them the time they moved to a farm.) Pretty cool, right?
Sharon: That's your favorite part, Randy.
Randy: I know you were loving it just as much as I was.
Sharon: No I wasn't.
Randy: Well, here's more.
Sharon: Goddamn it. I wonder how the kids are doing?
(Play Another Saturday Night by Sam Cooke for this section.)
Toolshed enters the gift shop and starts looking for a birthday gift for his mom. He then looks for a birthday card that says "Happy Birthday, Mom!" on it. He then remembers Randy telling him to be more original with the gifts, so he decided to find an original gift. Meanwhile with Shelly, she enters a mall that was floating in space for some reason. She was also searching for a gift for Sharon. She then sees a flower dress. She then grabs it and looks at it. Afterwards, she puts the dress in her shopping cart. Through the day, Toolshed and Shelly continued to search for more gifts for Sharon. When it's time to go to bed, they hid the gifts somewhere only they know and went to sleep.
In Randy and Sharon's barracks...
Someone enters the room and grabs Sharon while she was sleeping. The person then takes her to the ship and flies off.
The next morning...
Toolshed: Mom? Mom? Where are you?
Shelly: Hey Turd, are you looking for mom too?
Toolshed: Yeah, but she's nowhere to be found.
Chance Sureshot: You two are needed in Colonel Rawls' office.
Toolshed: What for?
Chance Sureshot: It's about your mother.
Shelly: What?
Later in Rawls' office...
Toolshed: OUR MOM WAS KIDNAPPED?!
Colonel Rawls: Yeah. Someone managed to hack into our defense system and they kidnapped your mother last night. Luckily, we manage to track them down.
Shelly: Well, where's our mom?!
Toothpick Sally: She's on a planet called Wash World.
Recap Robot: I set the coordinates to that planet. Everyone's mission is to head to that planet.
Randy: Yeah. We are gonna save my wife!
Shelly: Our mom is not gonna die on her birthday!
Toolshed: That's right! Let's go.
Everyone is now in the ships.
Sally: Don't worry. We'll save your mother.
Bessie: Yeah.
Toolshed: Thanks, Guys.
Ace Savvy: You're welcome. Now let's go save Mrs. Marsh!
One-Eyed Jack: Yeah!
Bessie proceeds to play a song on her Sony Walkman while she's in one of the ships.
(Play I Believe In Miracles by the Jackson Sisters for the rest of this section and skip to 0:54.)
Everybody starts blasting off into space en route to Wash World.
Chance Sureshot: Recap, what's the status?
Recap Robot: We are about to approach an asteroid field, so we need to navigate through them slowly and steady.
Toolshed: Don't worry, Mom. We're coming to save you.
They all made it past the asteroid field and they all start to continued to make their way to their rescue mission.
Charlie Brown: Any more asteroid fields?
Recap Robot: No. That was the only one. Now sit tight. We're about to reach light speed!
All the ships start to reach light speed.
Card Counter: This might be a bad time to mention this, but I get motion sick sometimes.
Queen of Diamonds: Hold it in, Lisa!
Card Counter: (Gags) I'll try.
Bessie: (Singing along to the song) I believe in miracles, I believe in miracles, I believe in miracles
Don't you? Don't you
La, la, la, la, la, la...
Gwen: God, will you shut the hell up, Stinkinbottom?!
Portia: Yeah! Your singing is annoying!
Bessie: But the song is catchy.
Toothpick Sally: Don't argue while we're about to go on a rescue mission!
Linus: Guys! I see Wash World!
Violet: Okay. Let's go save Mrs. Marsh!
The ships entered Wash World and landed. While the song was still playing, Bessie and Penny got out of them and started singing along to the song.
Bessie and Penny: (Singing along to the song) I believe in miracles, baby, I believe in you
I believe in miracles, baby, I believe in you
The song suddenly ended by Gwen, who grabbed ahold of Bessie's Walkman and clicked it off.
Gwen: Can we focus on the fucking mission instead of singing that song, you dumbasses?!
Bessie: But it is catchy.
Portia: I'm thinking about destroying that Walkman.
Gwen: Me too.
Bessie: Please don't.
Toothpick Sally: Okay. Keep an eye out on any suspicious people.
General Disarray: Okay. And according to the tracking chip I put in Mrs. Marsh, she's this way.
He points at the East side.
Toolshed: You put a tracking chip in my mom?!
The Coon: Dougie, I swear to god, I will fucking destroy you if you did the same to us!
Red blinking lights flashed on the South Park characters' faces.
General Disarray: Uh... I didn't.
He gave out an innocent smile.
Professor Chaos: Last time I check, I don't do good things for people. I'm a villain!
Call Girl: You're gonna help us for once!
Professor Chaos: Okay, Super Slut.
Stephen: Butters!
Toolshed: Don't call my girlfriend a super slut!
The Archer: Can we just focus?!
Shelly: Yeah! Let's go save Mom!
Toolshed: Yeah! We are wasting time arguing! Let's go!
They start to make their way to where Sharon was captured.
Several moments later...
Sharon: Help! Someone help me!
???: Nobody's gonna save you!
It was revealed to be some gingerbots.
Ginger Bot 1: Time to kick your ass!
Ginger Bot 2: Your birthday is also gonna be your death day!
Toolshed: That is not gonna happen!
The gingerbots noticed the space tree crew them from behind.
Sharon: Stanley!
Shelly: Let our mom go, you robotic turds!
The Coon: Aw no! These bitches are here?!
Human Kite: I thought we got rid of them!
Ginger Bot 3: If you want her back, you'll have to defeat us first!
Call Girl: Okay. This will be easy!
Everybody starts attacking the ginger bots. And after 2 minutes, Bessie starts to pull out her Walkman.
Bessie: Guys, huddle up!
They all approach Bessie and huddled up.
The Coon: Those guys have gotten stronger since we defeated them in the Tenorman war!
Ace Savvy: These guys have gotten powerful!
Penny: How are we gonna stop them?
Schroeder: They are so powerful!
Bessie: I know they are powerful, but we can stop them. We've done it before and we've done it again! We're not gonna stand by and let Mrs. Marsh suffer by the hands of these guys on her birthday! Who's with me?!
The Coon: Let's go kick their asses!
Professor Chaos: Let's fuck them up!
Gwen: For once, her speech actually motivated me.
(Play I'll Always Love My Mama by the Intruders for the rest of this section.)
They broke the huddle and charged towards the ginger bots. They start attacking the robots and they fired at them repeatedly. Violet punches the robots and slammed them on the ground. Sureshot, Recap and Toothpick Sally used their guns to destroy the robots. Freedom Pals and the Full House Gang use their powers to destroy multiple robots. Charlie Brown pulls out his hoverboard and uses the missile on it to shoot at them. The Night Club uses her guitar at full blast to destroy several gingerbots. Strong Suit is destroying more gingerbots. Shelly grabs two ginger bots and bashes their heads by slamming them at each other.
Shelly: That's for kidnapping my mom, you robotic turds!
Toolshed: Don't worry, Mom! We're gonna save you!
Sharon: Okay, Stanley! (She then manages to break free from the ropes and rejoined the others.) Actually, I'm finally free.
Chance Sureshot: Here you go.
He gives her a laser gun and she starts firing at all the ginger bots. Near the end of the song, the ones that didn't get destroyed decided to retreat. The song ends.
Ginger Bot 4: We'll get you back for this next time!
They all flied away.
Randy: Yeah! Fly away and go fuck yourselves, bitches!
Sharon: Thanks for coming to get me.
Toolshed: You're welcome, Mom.
The Coon: Since we're here, wanna have some fun?
Chance Sureshot: It's up to Rawls.
Colonel Rawls: (Through intercom) Sure. You have my permission. But if you take too long, you will drop and give me 500 when you get back to the Space Tree!
Recap Robot: Let's have fun.
(Play Finally by CeCe Peniston for this section and skip to 0:17.)
Everybody is having fun swimming at one of the amusement parks at Wash World. Randy brings out the birthday cake for Sharon.
Randy: Happy Birthday, Honey.
Sharon: Thanks, Everyone.
Stan: You're welcome, Mom.
Shelly: Let's continue this party!
Dougie: But not too much fun or Rawls will get on us.
Cartman pushes Dougie into the water.
Cartman: Piss off, Dorky!
Tom and Jerry shoot at each other with water guns in the background and then they chase each other. Everybody continues to party at the planet.
At Scott Tenorman's Impenetrable Space Fortress of Doom...
Scott T: You failed your mission?!
Ginger Bot 1: They were too powerful...
Ginger Bot 2: Yeah!
Scott T: You incompetent fools! No matter, my new interstellar amusement park is completed! Now to proceed with my plan!
He cackles evilly.
Stay tuned for episode 7.