Chapter LXXXXVIII

A Biting Need

I slowly open my eyes. Naruto's blond locks tickle my chin and face. I notice that he's in my arms, and that he's my little spoon; at that, one of my arms is numb and in urgent need of blood circulation. He snores and drools on my pillow… He took advantage of my deep sleep to curl up into a ball in my embrace. All in all, I feel much better.

The fatigue left me. The agonizing pain in my chest is tolerable. My thigh still burns a little if I move it. Cautiously, I touch my face. The swelling and the pain have disappeared; only the small cut remains. Even after a good day's sleep, my chakra reserves are abnormally low. With Naruto's venom, I should have recovered much more than that. I don't think I can feed him anytime soon, and I don't like that at all. Naruto doesn't eat his fill; his body can't return to a healthy weight. My hospitalization of more than a month was harmful to him; he lost the little he had gained.

Since the sun still illuminates my room despite the curtain, I painfully raise an arm to grab my dial. It's around seven, and it won't be long before nightfall. Naruto no longer tries to impose his nocturnal lifestyle on me … but I dive back into it on my own. If I'm not careful, I'll live like a nocturnal creature… That said, I honestly needed to sleep.

An odious sensation overwhelms all my attention. I growl, bringing my hand to my mouth. I don't know why, but I want to bite… I need to bite … and I'm starving. I have a weird feeling in my teeth … no, in these fangs. They're assailed by a painless pain, similar to the annoying itching that I experience daily in my fingers. It's such that I can't think of anything else. The feeling is the same as this morning … except it's a hundred times worse.

I have to bite.

I soothe the itch in my fingers by rubbing them on the floor. As I try to free my arm to do the same with the next one, I freeze. The sapphire-eyed boy carefully cuddles the plush in my image. This image troubles me. I bat my eyelashes and blush for a breath. I hugged Naruto who hugged me … sort of. It's too weird and way too disturbing.

I take the stuffed Kakashi from him and look at it with sordid curiosity, rubbing my nails over the rough surface. I stare at this hateful thing for too long. Mechanically, I touch the back of my neck. Without realizing it, I grind my teeth. I touch the plush close to its neck. My finger feels the fabric with desire. I want to find the perfect place to sink these fangs into this lifeless Kakashi, digging and tearing at the flesh until…

I widen my eyes, jumping. "What the hell am I thinking?! What is wrong with me?!"

My iris focuses again on the innocent doll. I see an imaginary drop of sweat beading on its temple. I feel judged by the gaze of this object, which seems to be afraid of me. The itching in these fangs is horrible. It itches like never before. As my stomach in crisis drums its request to be filled, I seriously think about biting it… I want to bite it… I have to bite it … and I don't know why. I can't get this overwhelming idea out of my head. What is happening to me? My heart speeds up, both with anxiety and excitement. I continue to caress the fabric with a calculated and precise gesture… Then, my nails capture my attention.

"No way… Do I really have to 'teething' my fangs like I sharpen my claws?! I don't want to do something so grotesque. Why is this happening to me?! Is this really the only solution to stop this?!"

I glance at the blond. He snores and his breathing is deep. Blushed to the roots of my hair, I shamefully show him my back. I turn my attention back to this hateful Kakashi, clenching my hands. I can't stand this itching any longer… I want it to stop. Now.

"Where do I bite it...?" I mutter, analyzing it from every angle. Needless to say, I'm pretty appalled at the thought of biting a thing in my likeness. "I can't do this… It's too morbid…"

With a trembling hand, I lower my mask to my chin. I half open my mouth and brush these fangs, these killing teeth of mine. Strangely, I perceive sensations on them, as if they had nerve endings. The urge to bite is unbearable. My heart in the middle of a marathon hurts me just as much.

I take a few deep breaths and make sure Naruto is sound asleep. I swallow. My hands are trembling so much that I almost drop the stuffed Kakashi. I stop thinking and let my instinct guide me. Although this thing doesn't have a neck, I bring these fangs close to the shoulder. I close my eyes, pushing them all the way in. A pleasant feeling invades me when the points pierce the fabric. Unconsciously, I clench my jaw tighter, increasing the pressure of my murderous vice. I crush the doll in my arms, preventing it from running away from me.

I withdraw and start again. I bite somewhere else to feel this pleasant electric current in my nerves. I pierce the inorganic skin, which tries to resist me in vain. I don't think about anything anymore. My breathing accelerates, follows the unstoppable pace of my organ of love. On my third bite, I nip at it, as if trying to reach something. An inexplicable frustration overwhelms me; I can't find what I'm looking for … although I have no idea what I want to find.

After a good while chewing the plush, I withdraw for good. It's wet from my saliva now… It's being pierced multiple times by these fangs in my mouth. It stares at me and judges me. I feel so stupid; I want to dig a pit to hide in and disappear forever…

The nasty itching returns and the urge to bite occupies all my thoughts again.

"It was no use… IT WAS NO USE!" I hiss through clenched teeth. "I'm the worst idiot there is!" I let out an angry sigh as I toss the stuffed Kakashi onto the sheets. I roughly slide a hand through my silver hair and let out silent giggles, starting to laugh derisively. "Why did I do that? I just acted like a damn chakra devourer…"

I pull up my mask and caress my neck for a breath. According to Naruto's thoughts, I'm still human…

I am still human.

Just a human with fangs…

A human and not a feral beast…

I come to my senses when my stomach rumbles like a storm. I'm starving, I think I'll soon have a craving. I'm willing to eat absolutely anything to make these painful gurgling noises finally stop. I jump up to go cook. Despite my suspiciously low chakra reserves, I recovered at lightning speed. My legs, which were threatening to collapse under their own weight, no longer wobble and remain straight. I no longer suffer martyrdom by moving my body. While I cook, I examine myself. My brutalized torso still hurts to the touch, but it's no longer scary to look at. The hematomas are simple bruises now. My finger hurts a little, but the splint is no longer necessary. I remove the bandage from my thigh. The wound has almost finished healing. I don't need to bandage it again.

No doubt possible. I have indeed inherited the regenerative ability of the chakra devourers. My wounds are healing in a clap of the finger; this is terrifying. Is this why I'm so hungry right now? I don't know … although it makes sense. My body must draw its strength from somewhere to produce such miracles…

I wolf down my food, careful not to stab my tongue. The stitches are very uncomfortable, and I don't feel like getting new ones so soon. When I finish my meal, I'm surprised to find myself wanting more. I cooked double my usual portion. Yet, I'm still feeling a little hungry. Fortunately, my stomach finally stops grumbling. Meanwhile, the horrible sensations in my teeth have disappeared. Curious. I won't complain about it; a little more, and I was gonna go crazy.

I clear the table, clean and tidy up before taking care of my oral hygiene. Since I started brushing again, it's been a real chore. These damn fangs in my mouth are bothering me, and I have to relearn something I've known how to do forever. I forget about them most of the time and end up banging my brush against them repeatedly, causing unpleasant starts. This frustrates me, and I sometimes think about stopping brushing my teeth… But, with my injured tongue, I have no choice.

I let out a sigh. Sure, I need to rest and recover, but I plan to go out anyway. I want to enjoy the sunlight as much as possible. The outside world calls me, invites me with open arms. Guilt has been eating away at me for too long. I have to go there today, not tomorrow. I won't be able to forgive myself if I wait any longer. When was the last time I came to see you...? It's been too long, of course.

I go to my room to get a change of clothes. However, I stop on the threshold of the door. Pouting, Naruto is standing on the bed, arms crossed, and staring at me with a stern look. In my field of vision, I see the plush that I … "assaulted" earlier with my teeth. Did he … notice...? Is this why he's upset?

"What is it, Naruto?" I ask cautiously.

A drop of sweat slides down my forehead and my heart races. After many blinks, his icy blue eyes focus a little higher on me. Then, the blond suddenly points at his feet. I raise an eyebrow, trying to understand what he wants from me. I think and think. I feel stupid; the teenager's "words" are simple … but I can't figure out what he wants from me… After an uncomfortable silence, Naruto frowns his overly furrowed eyebrows and points aggressively at the same place. When he sticks his tongue out for a breath, I finally understand his request—his order, I should say.

"Please, Naruto. I don't want that," I whine.

Not at all patient, he lets out a sharp hiss, and his tail thrashes in all directions.

"My hair looks great like this… Can't it wait another night...?"

Naruto bares his fangs, hissing as some lightning pulses from his skin. This is his final warning… He shifts position, ready to force me into my bed if necessary. If I persist in refusing, he will impose it on me forcefully and keep me hostage. Drained of my chakra, I have no chance of escaping him. If I turn my back on him, even for a millisecond, he will pounce on me…

I heave a heavy sigh and reluctantly obey him. I show him my back and drop down in front of him before crossing my legs. The hissing stops and Naruto begins his grooming ritual on my hair, which is gradually dripping with drool. Obediently, I endure his filthy torment while contemplating the void. I have unpleasant shivers due to his saliva, which freezes my skull and my anaesthetized skin. If only I had inherited some immunity to his saliva. It would be much more tolerable since Naruto is determined to impose his disgusting grooming on me. Glad it's not every day…

A thought of cutting my hair extremely short crosses my mind; a hope that Naruto would leave them alone.

Meanwhile, Naruto stops long before he's done. Perplexed, I turn my head. My heart jumps into my throat when I see the stuffed Kakashi in his hands. He points at the holes, pouting. He demands explanations from me. I'm mortified, probably scarlet. I want to curl up in a ball and forget that I exist. Why did I do that?! Especially since Naruto cares about this detestable thing that I damaged for no apparent reason. I'm the worst idiot ever. Why did I think I had to "teething" my fangs? Naruto doesn't. Why should I?! Now I'm faced with the extent of my stupidity.

Shamefully, I look away and make myself very small. "I… I couldn't help it…" I stammer softly.

Without warning, Naruto smacks the back of my head with his tail. I don't have time to arch my back before he roughly grabs my wet hair and pulls my head back. The sharp pain throbs at my oddly sensitive scalp, and I grit my teeth. Naruto glares at me, to the point that he no longer blinks… I feel like I'm being scolded like a kid, and I'm not happy about it at all…

"Alright. Got it. I'm sorry. I'll fix it, okay?" I say, clutching my hands in my lap.

His facial features soften, and he licks my forehead with his damn mutated catlike tongue scratching my skin. Naruto lets go of me to continue his work as if nothing had happened. I wipe away the excess drool trying to get into my eye.

I sigh, refrain from touching the back of my neck—for fear of frustrating the blond further. Since I was marked, Naruto's behaviours briefly changed towards me, and it's only now that I realize it. I don't know what I am in his eyes now … the nature of our relationship… Moreover, he knows fully well that the mark has changed me in many aspects. He knows that I have fangs and that my nails are "like" his claws. He should also know if I can devour chakra or not…

Whether it's possible or not is out of the question, and I don't want to know.

Even if Naruto finds his voice, I strictly forbid myself from asking him.

I convince myself that it's impossible—a vain attempt to reassure myself.

Lost in my thoughts, I no longer have the slightest notion of time. I come back to reality when Naruto is on his knees in front of me. The heaviness left my hair, indicating that he has finished slobbering it carefully. However, he avoids looking at me; his nervousness betrays his desire to ask me something. I'm patiently waiting for him to pronounce himself… Maa, in his own way. Since he left the stuffed Kakashi in the sheets and my offer to repair it was enough to silence his anger, I don't know what he wants to ask me. Hunger must be tugging at him, but it hasn't been long enough for him to ask for it.

After an eternity, Naruto looks back at me, holding his breath. He leans towards me, shows me his mane…

He wants me to groom his hair as he does mine…

After another drawn-out silence, Naruto raises his head.

"Never."