"Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase." —Martin Luther King, Jr.

/

I have no idea how much time has passed. I was able to slip away during the clean up from dinner. I needed some time alone, to process and get my emotions back under control after talking about things I've bottled up for so long. It was terrifying and relieving and more therapeutic that I ever would have thought possible. But it left me drained, exhausted, and spent.

It's starting to get dark outside, and I'm just lying on my back, staring up at the ceiling and feeling numb when someone clears their throat in the doorway.

I shoot upright only to find Sokka scuffling the toe of his boot into the dust. "Hey," he says awkwardly. "Can I talk to you for a second?"

I'm so surprised I just stare at him.

"Never mind. You're obviously busy." He starts to turn away.

"No, wait!" I stand up too quickly, my ribs twinging in protest.

Sokka turns back to me, almost cautious like.

"What's up?"

Sokka sighs like he's regretting whatever he's about to ask me already. "If someone was captured by the Fire Nation, where would they be taken?"

I frown at him. "What do you mean? Who was captured?"

Sokka looks away, shame filling his eyes. "When the invasion plan failed, some of our troops were taken." He crosses his arms across his chest to keep from fidgeting "I just want to know where they might be."

"I can't tell you."

"What? Why not!" Now anger flits across his features.

I try not to flinch, feeling like I'm already backsliding after all the progress I made over the conversation at dinner. "Trust me." It's for his own sanity. "Knowing will just make you feel worse."

Sokka drops his arms, his hands clenched into fists. "Please. It's my dad. He was captured too"

I silently curse myself. I'm such an idiot. Sokka wouldn't be asking me about this unless he was worried about someone. I know I'd do the same exact thing if it were Uncle.

He stares defiantly at me, but I can see the shame and guilt eating away at him. "I need to know what I put him through."

"Are you sure?" I sit back in the bed, gesturing for him to join me. "It's not good."

He hesitates a moment before perching on the edge of the bed as if ready to leap up and fight at any second. "Please." His voice breaks and he looks away to hide the tears sliding down his cheeks.

His pain is my fault. My family's fault. I owe him this even if they knowledge will break him. "My guess is they were taken to the Boiling Rock."

"What's that?"

"The highest security prison in the Fire Nation."

Sokka glances at me sharply, horror in his eyes.

I have to force myself to continue. I don't want to hurt him more than I already have. "It's on an island in the middle of a boiling lake. It's inescapable."

There's a hard set to Sokka's jaw. "Where is this place?"

I eye him suspiciously. "Why do you need to know? What are you planning?"

"Nothing!" He jabs me painfully in the chest. "And even if I did, it's none of your business!"

I look away, feeling like an idiot. Even after talking about the banishment and my mother, I can't be trusted. Even if I am trying to protect them from themselves. Not that I blame them or would feel any differently if I were in their position.

I close my eyes and pray to the Spirits that I'm not making another terrible mistake. "It's in the middle of a volcano. Between here and the Fire Nation."

When I look back at Sokka, his features have softened. He almost looks…hopeful?

"You guys actually flew right past it on the way here."

"Thank you, Zukio."

And it sounds like he means it.

I grab his arm as he gets up to leave. "Just don't do anything stupid, okay? Aang and the others need you."

He shakes his arm out of my grip, glaring so fiercely at me that I feel myself physically shrinking. "You have no right to pretend that you care about us!" He spits at my feet before stalking out of the room.

I deflate, flopping back onto the bed. I feel like crying but I deserve every bit of venom they have to throw at me. I wish I hadn't been such a traitorous asshole to them because I need Sokka, just this once, to listen to me. If he goes to rescue his dad like I suspect his is, he's either going to get himself killed or captured. The others won't be able to recover if anything happens to him.

Fuck! This just might be the stupidest idea I've come up with yet, but I can't let Sokka walk into a deathtrap on his own.

I spring out of bed, my ribs clamoring at me. I'm in such a rush that I nearly bowl Katara over. I quickly scramble backwards, cursing the unlucky timing. Spirits! When have I ever been lucky?!

Hands on hips, Katara glares at me suspiciously. "Where are you off to in such a hurry?" she demands.

"Ah…bathroom?"

Toph peeks out from behind Katara. "That time was a lie."

Shit! I can't violate Sokka's trust by telling them what I'm actually doing. I'm more than a hundred percent sure he didn't tell the others what he's up to. They'd only try to stop him.

Katara narrows her eyes at me. "Well, I was coming over here to thank you for your honesty back there but now I'm not even sure why I bothered."

I blanch, feeling like such a fucking idiot. Well there goes all that hard earned trust. "Katara—"

"Save it!" she snaps, turning away from me. "Lock him in Toph." And she walks away.

"Wait!" I cry out, pleading really.

But Toph has already raised the stone wall, the little window now merely a peep hole. I must have pissed her off too. I pound against it uselessly before slumping to the floor.

"Please," I beg the empty room.

/

I'm squinting against the intense concentration it's taking to focus a beam of white hot flames on melting Toph's damn stone barricade. Fuck! How thick did she make this thing! Even widening the peep hole is taking far longer than I'd originally thought it would.

I'm terrified I'll be too late and Sokka's already gone.

I'm scared out of my mind about how the others will react if they discover me trying to escape. I'm risking everything by trying to make sure Sokka doesn't go and get himself killed. But Aang will be fine now. He's gotten over the hump in his firebending. If I'm no longer allowed to teach him after this, Aang will be okay. They all will. I'm going to make sure of it.

The stone suddenly crumbles away and I stumble back in surprise. I don't know what I'll do if it's Aang. I definitely don't know what I'll do if it's Toph.

"Zuko?"

Okay. I can start panicking now. "Hi, Toph."

She wrinkles her nose at me. "What are you doing? I could sense you all the way over in my room. Trying to sleep here!"

Shit! What do I do?!

She cocks her head to the side. "A week ago I would have assumed you were just trying to escape. But now," she steps to the side, unblocking the way, "I trust that you have a good reason."

Gratitude fills me. "Toph—"

She holds up a hand. "You owe me. Katara's going to flay me alive when she finds out I let you out."

"Thank you," I say sincerely, pausing in the doorway. "I won't let you down."

Toph just snorts. "Make sure Sokka doesn't do anything too stupid."

I start at her words.

"What? He was in your room and left pretty worked up before Katara and I got here. Plus, I just sensed him sneaking out so you'd better hurry."

I can't help the smile that slides out. I bow deeply to her before racing off towards where I can hear Appa snoring.

I don't have time to contemplate Toph's words or that she's choosing to trust me. I'm still not sure I've done anything to earn that trust. But now I have a chance to prove to myself that I have changed. Doing what I'm about to do is going to put me in more danger than Sokka.

I'm so relieved to see Appa still sleeping that I don't notice my protesting ribs as I clamber up to the saddle. I beat Sokka by mere seconds, his head peeking over the top of the saddle just as I've collapsed against the side.

"Zuko?" He stares open mouthed at me.

"Not up to anything, huh."

He clamps his mouth shut and clambers the rest of the way in. "Fine. I'm going to rescue my father. Happy now?"

"I'm never happy."

He just glares at me. "Look. I have to do this. The invasion plan was my idea. It was my decision to stay when things were going wrong. It's my mistake, and it's my job to fix it. I have to regain my honor." He looks away, that shame clouding his face one more. "You can't stop me, Zuko."

"Sokka." I lightly touch him on the arm. He flinches away from me but I don't move. "You need to regain your honor? Believe me. I get it."

That finally gets him to look at me.

"I'm going with you."

"No," Sokka says frimley, instantly.

I try not to let his instant dismissal sting.

"I have to do this alone."

I grit my teeth, recognizing some of my old self in the set of Sokka's jaw. I refused help then. Maybe I can get Sokka to see reason. We all need help. We just suck at recognizing when we need it. "How are you going to get there? On Appa? Last I checked, prisons don't have bison daycares."

Sokka sighs. "Fine. You've got me. I'm assuming you have a better idea?"

Indeed I do. "We'll take my war balloon.

He raises an eyebrow at me.

"What?" I complain, feeling slightly defensive. "I had to get here somehow!"

"Fine, I'll take your war balloon. But I don't trust you enough to let you come with me. In fact, how'd you get out of your room?"

My heart squeezes painfully at Sokka's words. But I'm not surprised either. "You can't operate the war balloon without me. Father ordered the design modified so only firebenders can operate the balloons."

Sokka looks ready to punch the nearest thing. Which just so happens to be me. I scoot as furtively as I can slightly away from him.

"Look, I don't have to be a part of your plans. I can just get you there and back." And make sure you don't get yourself caught or killed. "And it was Toph who let me out."

Sokka looks up sharply at that. He pinches the bridge of his nose before sighing in defeat. "Fine. You can come. But only to operate the war balloon. Got it?"

I nod. "Got it."

"And Toph must have her reasons for letting you out. If she's willing to give you a chance then maybe I should too."

I can't help the rush of gratitude that races through me. I am going to prove myself and regain my honor. The right way this time.

"Shall we?" I gesture towards the winding staircase that leads to the top of the cliffs.

Sokka flips me off before sliding off Appa.

I grin before following suit.

Author's Note

While the gist of the Boiling Rock plot line will stay the same for this story, I do make some pretty major adjustments because (since I'm not writing for kids) I can actually make these two episodes much more realistic.