Madame Masseuse
"Just a Case of Emotional Paralysis"
She cried but he didn't panic.
Maybe what she said earlier about happy tears had sunk in, or perhaps he just understood where these particular tears were coming from.
Either way, Inuyasha didn't capitulate to the discomfort he usually did when she cried. He reacted quickly, scooping her up into his arms and pinning her with a firm embrace like he'd had a contingency plan for this.
Every part of Kagome tingled with satisfaction. She had never felt such whole body satedness before. It combusted beneath her skin, lit up her nervous system. Emotionally and physically, she felt so much it became too much. She felt like a balloon taking in too much helium. Crying seemed to be her body's way of processing, of purging out all the excess that overwhelmed her.
Her orgasm had subsided and Inuyasha's softening, spent member slipped out. Even though she was now empty, Kagome felt a presence within her. There was both a lingering aura and a noticeable hollowness where Inuyasha had been, like the ghost of an echo after leaving a deafening room. That sensation grew until the presence was in every corner and recess of her body. Crying was all she seemed capable of. Kagome smeared her face into his chest, gripping him harder, her fingers clawing at his back, his nape. She was desperate to feel closer to him despite their skin already touching, his weight bearing down on her. Their arms shook from the intensity of their embrace.
"I got you," Inuyasha whispered into her hair. The gentleness of his words made her cry harder. "I got you, sweetheart. I got you."
She wanted to laugh, to joke that sweetheart was her term of endearment and he needed to get his own. But the emotional tsunami in her chest and the shockwave rippling through her body overtook her aptitude for humour, and she gave in to another gasping cry. Kagome pressed herself against Inuyasha's throat, crying directly into his skin as she practically strangled him with her arms and shoulders.
What she felt for Inuyasha wasn't just big. In the aftermath of making love, it felt cataclysmic. It was colossal. Her heart carried her love for him with Herculean strength. The sheer hugeness of how much she loved him made her weep fiercely.
In just over three months, she and Inuyasha had created and fostered something Kagome and Hojo never even came close to in eleven years. The waste, the anguish, the pain of all those years hit her hard. She didn't understand how these ugly tears could be both a celebration of her leviathan-sized affection for Inuyasha and a eulogy for a time of her life she'd never been more grateful to call the past.
The longer she cried, the harder she cried. The harder she cried, the larger this feeling became.
She loved him. She loved Inuyasha so much.
The sensation making her body tremble seemed to become better in some ways and worse in others as soon as her mind uttered the word mate. She couldn't stop wishing she was his mate. She couldn't understand how this hugeness she felt wasn't matehood. It felt too paralyzing to be ordinary.
The memory of his words, his refusal to bite her, had more tears falling, a sputtering, wet gasp for breath that left streaks of saliva on Inuyasha's skin.
"Breathe, Kagome." He caressed her shoulders, cupped her nape. "I know it's a lot, but it'll pass, darlin', I promise. I got you." Then, in a hoarsely quiet timbre, "I thought this might—I didn't know if it would, but—" He sighed, squeezing her tighter, forcing more tears from her— "I won't let go 'til you tell me it's better, alright?" He kissed her forehead tensely. "You might start feelin'—" He paused bluntly, then said, "Whatever you need, darlin'. Anything. I would do anything for you, Kagome."
Those sweet, whispered words had her stuttering through a fresh round of sobs. "I-I-Inu-ya-yasha...wh-what's—?"
"Shh," he said, interrupting her, clutching her in his arms. He trailed kisses down the side of her head, her face. "You're okay. It'll pass. What you're feelin', Kagome...I know it's big, but...just breathe, okay? I got you."
"Wh-wh-what is ha-happen—?"
"I got you, baby, just hang onto me, alright? What you're feeling, it...it's—" He sighed and never deigned to finish that sentence. Instead he said, "I know," then cradled her head, tucking her safely in his arms, in the hollow of his neck. He continued kissing her as she wept.
Why did he sound like he knew exactly what was happening? Why the hell had he suspected she would break down like this? He seemed so...calm, so stoic. He had his shit too together to be experiencing what she was, to be feeling how she felt.
The premise that he may not feel the same way had sobs shaking her shoulders.
Nothing made sense. She was overwhelmed with love, overwhelmed with a crushing, lamentable sadness that was simultaneously relief. She was hot and cold, large and small. She cried so hard a slimy ball of nausea rose in her stomach. She couldn't stop shaking. Kagome and Inuyasha were a tangle of parts and limbs, indistinguishable from each other. She was surprised she didn't feel embarrassed for falling apart in his arms like this.
Was this just her being a stereotypical female, crumbling under the weight of lofty emotions after finally getting the guy?
No, she refused to accept that. This feeling and these tears felt so much more than that. She honestly felt like she'd collapse in on herself if Inuyasha wasn't there holding her together. She felt love like an earthquake, her tears a hurricane, her body barely able to keep itself in one piece.
It was also alarming how insanely horny she was, so soon after climaxing.
When Kagome decided she needed to become closer, she reached between their bodies to stroke him. She couldn't believe it had only been a handful of minutes since they made love, a fact made obvious by the spent condom Inuyasha still wore. Her body was insatiable with need. Relief like she'd never known ballooned in her chest when he began to harden. She tried to remove the condom with trembling fingers.
"P-p-please," she hiccupped, her voice thick and wet. "I-Inu-y-yasha, please."
Inuyasha sat them up, her in his lap, straddling him. He cradled her face, kissed her, wiped her tears. He created space between their bodies to discard the used condom. Maybe it was the emotional fog she navigated, maybe it was that inhuman speed of his, but it seemed like no time had passed at all before he was throbbingly hard again, a new condom rolled down his shaft, and he was lifting her up to position himself at her entrance. When Inuyasha lowered her onto him, his lips crashed to hers. Their faces and hands were wet with tears and saliva from the madness of their kiss.
She moaned, sinking onto him fully. That hollowing ache inside her disappeared as her body slurped him in greedily, hungrily. The moment her ass met his thighs, Inuyasha didn't allow her to settle. He was driving up into her with thrusts that had her breasts bouncing, their breaths skipping.
"Hold onto me," he whispered into her mouth, wiping tears from her cheeks with his palm. "I got you, Kagome."
"I-I-Inuyasha," she stuttered, trying to catch her breath as he sunk in and out of her with quickened, deep thrusts that had his balls slapping her steadily. She folded her arms around his neck, one at a time.
Her next orgasm found her quickly, startling her with its speed and intensity. With her release, Kagome's tears stopped.
Inuyasha came soon after with a roar. He was a flurry of driving hips and aggressive thrusts. His cry of pleasure resonated through her body and rang in her ears as his teeth pressed into her throat. Kagome wanted to scream with disappointment when he tore his mouth away. There was a desperation in his retreat, just when his fangs started to bear down.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" Inuyasha cried out in time with his ball-slapping thrusts, emptying himself fully.
His forehead collapsed in the slope of her neck, his breath hoarse and heaving. His pulse beat chaotically in his chest, almost in time to hers. Kagome's tears had stopped but her breathing was still tumultuous. The urge to say I love you was a force like she'd never known. She stifled it, swallowed it down, choked it deep inside her until she was thankfully distracted by gentle kisses on her neck, chin, then lips.
"You okay?"
Kagome felt the dull throb of his softening erection inside her and she adjusted her hips to prevent him from slipping out. She wasn't ready to reacquaint herself with the emptiness of being without him just yet.
"Yeah," she answered softly, quietly. "I'm okay." She opened her mouth—wanting him to explain his knowledge surrounding her tears and what she felt—but closed it when Inuyasha spoke first.
"Bathe with me?"
Kagome smiled into his neck and nodded, kissing the juncture between his throat and shoulder. Her eyebrows furrowed, noticing an awareness of his pulse that she didn't think she had before, or at least had never previously noticed. Her tongue and lips lingered where his pulse most noticeably fluttered beneath his skin. Kagome sucked that spot between her swollen lips, grazing it with her teeth. Inuyasha inhaled sharply.
If her boyfriend noticed her newfound discovery, he didn't say, but he did angle his head with a pleasing little moan, drawing her lips elsewhere on his throat. The enticing saltiness of unkissed skin was an effective enough distraction. Her mouth drew a trail of wet, sucking kisses down the length of his shoulder, biting the smooth, broad arch at the end.
After Inuyasha inevitably exited her and he removed the condom, it wasn't long before his hard cock swatted her in the ass. She giggled huskily into his skin. She nibbled him again, taking great care in accentuating the pressure of her teeth as they dragged to the peak of his shoulder.
That was something she'd never get used to: how quickly Inuyasha could present her an erection so soon after draining himself.
She squeaked through a thick, hoarse laugh when Inuyasha scooped her up into his arms and had them flying off the bed, headed towards his ensuite. He kicked the door closed behind them.
The room was dark, moody like his kitchen, but midnight blues and navy instead of black, with gold and pearl accents. In preparation for her overnight stay, Inuyasha had laid out an assortment of towels for her and Kagome beamed at the thoughtfulness. Her heart soared, taking in the flameless candles that flickered throughout the room. She kissed his cheek in acknowledgment of the vases of flowers here too.
As Inuyasha prepared them a bath, Kagome stared, horrified, at her reflection and the red puffiness that stared back. She splashed cold water over her face, her eyes feeling tight and sore.
When the bath was ready, Inuyasha's chest brushed her back, his lips on her neck. Kagome smiled when his gaze met hers in the mirror. Amber eyes narrowed hungrily as Inuyasha watched himself cup her breast, roll her fast-hardening nipple between adept fingers. With her first moan, he wrapped one arm beneath her knees and the other around her back and carried her into the tub. What started as a gentle exchange of quiet kisses and hushed words quickly escalated into Inuyasha's definition of a sexy bath, except instead of a showerhead (which his jacuzzi had), Kagome would get off using her half-demon boyfriend.
Inuyasha positioned Kagome so she was on her knees in front of him, her back to his chest. He angled her an acute degree over the edge of the tub, her gaze over her shoulder to watch him eagerly. She snuck a peck on his cheek while he placed a slow, sucking kiss to her shoulder before he put space between them. The water was loud with his movements amongst the jets. Kagome's eager heartbeats were louder.
She grinned at his level of preparedness, noticing the condom wrappers stacked amongst bottles of soap next to the jacuzzi. She wiggled her ass at him in a taunting gesture that bade him to hurry up. Inuyasha groaned at the sight. He sucked his teeth with a smirk and a murmuring hum of arousal and swiftly clad his twitching, keen erection. Kagome's teasing became a gruff, smoky gasp when Inuyasha sheathed himself inside her in one deep plunge from behind.
After a mutually explosive orgasm—Inuyasha asserting that taking her from behind his most favourite thing in the entire world—their bath turned intimate. They exchanged kisses and smiles, taking turns washing each other. Inuyasha helped her dry off, becoming hard again as his towel-covered hands traced the slopes and hollows of her body. Their lips swollen from kissing and bodies still damp, he carried her back to bed where they engaged in round four, making love for the second time.
Thankfully, this time, Kagome didn't find herself crying, although she did still feel that huge, overwhelming sensation in her chest of astronomical and seemingly-impossible proportions.
No, this time seemed to impact Inuyasha.
Appearing reluctant to pull out of her, Inuyasha became introspective, quiet. He wore a serious and contemplative expression and was unable, unwilling, to explain why. The way he held her became tight, constrictive. He pinned her to his chest, combating her every attempt to look at him. Silence answered her no matter how many times she asked him if he was okay. Worried, Kagome fought his embrace. But eventually he just shook his head at her. The gesture, which she felt rather than saw, was effective as a non-verbal stop, and he buried his face in her hair. Kagome stilled and ceded his request to do nothing, to say nothing. Closing her eyes, she decided to focus on the sound of his racing heart and the way her cheek absorbed the heat of his chest.
After an extensive silence, she softly asked, "Is this the same thing that happened to me?"
Inuyasha gave her no clear answer. The response she received was a firmer embrace and a fluttering, hectic rhythm in his chest like hummingbird's wings. His fingers found the charm at her neck and he enclosed it in his palm like a lifeline.
Kagome continued to say nothing, do nothing. When she had been the one paralyzed by her emotions, being held and feeling close to him was all she wanted. That made Kagome wonder if he wanted something similar, if he was feeling emotionally overwhelmed. Given how adamantly he didn't want her to see his face, she struggled against his hold, twisting him onto his back, climbing atop him. She settled along his length, her legs tanging with his. She pressed a chaste kiss to his Adam's apple then tucked her head beneath his chin.
When it became too hard to ignore the tackiness of the spent condom between them, Kagome rolled it off him the same way she'd seen him do it. His embrace was stifling, leaving her very little room to maneuver. She couldn't understand why he seemed so scared to let her see his face. The condom wrapped in a tissue and abandoned somewhere beside them—since Inuyasha wouldn't loosen his grip enough for her to put it on the bedside table—Kagome nuzzled his chin, his throat, draping him with her body while her hands stroked his skin.
"I'm here," she told him. Those two words were a refrain, whispered repeatedly into his skin. Her breath and her love soaked into him along with her warmth and her weight. His embrace became harder, a touch painful while his body vibrated beneath her. She kissed his throat, chest, and shoulders. "I'm here, sweetheart," she said. She didn't like the way his body quivered more when she kissed that spot on his throat where his pulse was wild, so she did her best to ignore it.
When his cock became solid, a forceful, needful, urgent thing between them, Kagome remembered her own debilitating arousal and desperation to be filled, to be closer. She spread her legs wider, ignoring the deep-seated ache inside her that worsened after every coupling, and she impaled herself on his meaty crown. The gasping, husky sound that Inuyasha made in the back of his throat had a familiar lust wrenching Kagome's insides. Knowing she was being dumb and reckless by taking him inside her unprotected, she'd allow them a brief, bare taste. He'd never get closer to her than this, and she wanted to give him that, at least for one, small moment.
Inuyasha's palms cupped and massaged her ass, eliciting a breathy whimper from Kagome. When he bottomed out, they lingered there, his grip on her ass unyielding. The sensation of Inuyasha throbbing inside her, his pulse aligning with hers, was unlike anything she'd ever felt before. This was everything. She cried out when he ground himself against her, stroking that sensitive spot at the apex of her thighs with his pelvis. Inuyasha pinned her against him, wiggling his hips side to side to ensure every millimetre found its way inside her. She counted to ten, thinking she was being more than generous to give him what he wanted—throbbing closeness, hot, lingering intimacy—then she pushed up on her hands to look him in the face.
Inuyasha was flushed, his eyes closed beneath tight brows. Every one of his breaths were serrated, measured, restrained. With his eyes closed, she couldn't see any sign that he'd been crying like she'd suspected. She also hadn't felt drops of tears when he wouldn't let her look at him. But when his eyes finally opened, his molten amber shimmered with an emotional, wet glassiness, silver lining his lashes. The sight of water pooling in his eyes made Kagome's throat thicken with the threat of her own tears. She cradled his face, fought the urge to say I love you, and kissed him deeply. It was heartachingly moving, the sight of unshed tears in his eyes. When he rotated their bodies, pinning her beneath him, he nibbled at her lips, loitering inside her. He shimmied his hips back and forth, testing the boundaries of being to the hilt, enjoying the naked pleasure of him fully inside her. Then he unsheathed himself with a sinful, wet sound. Inuyasha tore open a new condom wrapper with his teeth, adorned the latex, and unleashed himself on Kagome.
Biting down on her lip to avoid revealing how she felt, Kagome winced as her cut from earlier reopened. She let Inuyasha set the pace, her arms circling his neck and hips rising to meet his. She took him as deep as her body would allow when he needed the closeness. She juddered beneath his hard thrusts, her body pounding the mattress when he needed the roughness. As he neared climax, he tucked Kagome against him, cradling her with his entire body, her face in his neck.
He came with her mouth on his throat, whispering into that spot with the fluttering pulse, "I'm here, Inuyasha. I got you."
That was the only time they had intercourse when Inuyasha climaxed and Kagome didn't. Although, Kagome would never complain about that. Orgasms, while a lovely little bonus, were not the primary reason she sought intimacy with him. Inuyasha, however, wouldn't allow it to stand. His mouth and fingers were upon her once his shuddering ecstasy passed. He was so attentive in giving her pleasure Kagome came so hard she squirted. They were a tangle of pounding hearts and limbs after that.
"You okay?" she asked him hesitantly when she was finally able to speak.
"Yeah," he replied softly, kissing her temple. He was silent for a few heartbeats before he said with a smirk, "You're definitely goin' on birth control, Kagome."
She propped herself up on her elbows to look at him with a raised brow. "Oh, I am, am I?"
"Fuck yes," he said with a broadening grin, cupping her nape to draw her in for a kiss. "'Cause I need to feel you like that every time."
She rolled her eyes. She would've been more annoyed with his alpha-ness had she not already planned to go on birth control. "You liked being raw with me, Inuyasha?"
He groaned at that. "Feelin' you? Bein' bare inside you? Fuck, Kagome, nothin' has ever felt that good."
She kissed him. "I know," she assented with a soft smile. "I want it again too."
His eyes bounced between hers. "I know I have good control, but—"
"Not without a condom," she said into his lips. Her tone was laced with a seriousness she didn't use very often with him. "You were sad. That one time was an exception, and even that was reckless of me."
Inuyasha snorted. "I wasn't sad." He cupped her face, kissing her chin. "But I know why you did it, and I appreciate the hell outta you, Kagome."
She licked her lips before opening her mouth with two questions burning her tongue. What happened, Inuyasha? What was that?
He kissed her profoundly, rolling himself on top of her to deepen the kiss. Her mind fought the distraction for as long as she could before the allure of his mouth and stroking organ became too fierce a force. It was impossible to hold logical, organized thought when all she wanted to do was submit to the claim of his mouth. Stupid Inuyasha and his deliciously distracting tongue.
They never did talk about her crying. Kagome never did ask Inuyasha how he seemed to know she would experience an emotional, teary volcano after their first coupling. She also never asked him to explain his emotional reaction after their fourth time, and he never volunteered that information either. They processed their feelings through the discovery of their bodies. Not every time was making love, but Kagome became easily overwhelmed by how often it happened. Inuyasha was a generous lover, and he was a fast learner to shut up when Kagome decided it was her turn to take the lead (not very often) or take care of him (more often). She never would have expected to know another as intimately as she knew herself.
They got maybe two hours of sleep, and realistically it was even less. Kagome would start to doze in his arms, feel his erection digging into her and then she'd reach around him to guide his cock between her legs. Sex while spooning? It was new to Kagome, and she was a big fan. She'd never been so horny her entire life. It scared her a little, how much Inuyasha kept her aching for him, how easily her body disregarded the soreness between her legs with a craving for more. When Kagome finally fell asleep, it was almost six in the morning. She was properly fucked, properly ouch, and wrapped up in Inuyasha, never having been happier to find herself sticky, sore, and severely swollen.
The eight times they'd had intercourse that night—Kagome couldn't believe that number even though her body certainly did, especially her well-loved, aching vagina—she was pleased that it was either lovemaking or playful sex. To Kagome's surprise, there wasn't any fucking. But then again, Inuyasha had said something about wanting their first night together to be gentle. Between the intercourse and how much Inuyasha loved licking and touching her, Kagome couldn't keep track of her orgasms, which was saying something. Apparently, Inuyasha wanted to keep her well-sated so she was useless to everyone else but him.
She woke up to Inuyasha's head between her legs and came hard from the attentiveness of his mouth. He said her pussy tasted best when it convulsed around his tongue. Naturally, she had to repay the favour and suck him off. He emptied his balls into her mouth and Kagome swallowed him happily. No one worried about morning breath when every part of them tasted and smelled like the other. Her body was exhausted, intumesced and puffy from a night and morning of frenzied and impassioned sex. When they weren't having sex, they held each other and talked. Silence wasn't often, but it was comfortable when it found them. Inuyasha frequently caressed the Drop in those moments of quiet.
It wasn't until almost midday on Saturday that Kagome realized she never executed her original plan of wearing the lingerie she had purchased for their first time. Inuyasha had brought her bag into his room but then Kagome became sidetracked by giving him oral.
That was something at which Inuyasha was exceptionally talented: being sexually distracting.
When Kagome decided they finally needed to get out of bed to eat something, she slid into a pair of Inuyasha's boxer shorts, only to find he was so turned on by the sight he had to immediately show his girlfriend how much he liked them by removing them. An hour later, when Kagome tried to leave his bedroom a second time, she threw on one of his plain black t-shirts, which hit just above her mid-thigh. She made it as far as the kitchen sink before Inuyasha was on his knees behind her, eating her out. Her clitoris borderline numb with pleasure, and Kagome able to move again, she opened his fridge to find them something to eat. Unfortunately, when she bent over, Inuyasha caught sight of her puffy, pink, and distended labia, and he tugged her down to the kitchen floor. When Kagome realized his intentions, she had panicked, shouting the one word, "Condom!" to which end Inuyasha simply laughed and removed one from a pocket of the sweatpants he discarded on the floor next to them. Then he fucked her on her hands and knees between his dishwasher and his oven.
Over the course of Saturday, Kagome found it easier to just accept wearing one of Inuyasha's large, baggy t-shirts if she wanted to be "dressed". He seemed to like lifting the hem to find her wet and wanting. And Kagome had to agree—there was something especially erotic about glimpsing the base of his cock beneath the shirt hem when he slid between her legs, and feeling his hands on her breasts beneath the organic cotton. For the most part, however, she and Inuyasha lounged in bed naked. They ate in bed, took a nap at Kagome's behest, and as the sun began to set, they showered together. Well, Kagome had started having a shower, and Inuyasha joined her towards the end. When he started to lower himself, like he was going to pleasure her with his mouth, Kagome dropped to her knees—probably bruising them—to take him into her mouth, her hands working him roughly. Given they were in the shower, she offered for him to come on her face. He was pretty happy about that.
By the time Saturday night rolled around, Kagome told Inuyasha her vagina was completely off limits because she had an honest to goodness limp from how sore and swollen she was. Anytime she got up to move around and Inuyasha saw her wince, he smiled with such wild, mischievous, masculine pride, Kagome would smack him in the arm and then kiss him. She did that a lot that evening. Inuyasha had given her more orgasms in less than twenty-four hours than Kagome had had when she considered herself the most sexually active in her twenties. He could give her the rest of the night off.
At first, Kagome worried how Inuyasha would take her saying no, but he was a good sport about it. He seemed to think it was funny, taking it more as a compliment that he fucked her too well than considering it an actual denial. They migrated to the living room, making camp in front of Inuyasha's TV. Not quite halfway during a movie, Inuyasha leaned over to whisper in her ear that he wanted to get off by fucking her tits. Kagome grinned mischievously and whipped his t-shirt over her head in answer. It was one of the most sexual things Kagome had ever done, having him straddle her chest so he could basically masturbate with her tits. Kagome learned that Inuyasha really liked it when she licked his cum off her own nipples.
The movie over and their stomach's rumbling, Kagome went to the kitchen, having offered to make them some supper. When Inuyasha disappeared, saying he wanted a quick shower, Kagome hijacked his sound system. She danced along to some of her favourite female singer-songwriters while she turned on the rice cooker and breaded and fried some pork cutlets.
Kagome shaking her hips to a fantastic sax solo is how Miroku stumbled upon her when he let himself into Inuyasha's condo.
Inuyasha's best friend didn't seem to notice her right away. He brandished the set of keys Inuyasha had given him in case of emergencies and let himself in while he was in the middle of a rant. The sound of the man's sing-song voice had Kagome freezing. Her heart in her throat, she spun to face the door, spatula in hand. When Miroku closed and locked the door behind him, his downturned gaze focused on his outerwear while he continued speaking. Kagome watched him like a deer in headlights.
"—surely an emergency, Inuyasha, I promise you! I would let myself in for no lesser reason. For I am in love and she's agreed to be my date to brunch on Sunday, and has even consented to a lunch date next week. A lunch date, Inuyasha! The most casual of casual get-togethers and my sweet Sango likes me enough to permit me to join her amongst the trivial pursuits of her week! She'll be my wife before the end of next year, mark my words! We must celebrate, my friend! You have finally claimed your dream girl, and I am well on my way to acquiring mine! Ah, she is a vision, Inuyasha! Mine, I mean, although yours is certainly a feast for the eyes as well. If I could've taken one picture of Sango last night, I would have it framed upon every surface of my house. One kiss. She gifted me one solitary kiss and I could die from the softness of such lips. The taste of that woman will be in my mouth until my dying days, Inuyasha. And to think I only almost fucked it up once by telling her she would become the future mother of my children and—"
After having shrugged out of his coat and taken off his shoes, he stood and finally turned to find no trace of the person to whom he thought he spoke. Instead, Miroku confronted a very red-faced Kagome in the kitchen, pulling on the hem of Inuyasha's t-shirt. The look on his face made her wish the floor would swallow her whole.
"—Oh, hello."
This wasn't her first time meeting Miroku, but it was her first time being alone with him. The interaction had Kagome looking at him with widened, appraising eyes.
He wore a periwinkle Henley long-sleeve and black jeans. He was tall and lean like Inuyasha; however, Miroku had a different boyish handsomeness to him—all light and bright to complement Inuyasha's rugged volatility. His black hair had a mild curl that hung in his eyes. It would probably graze his shoulders if he didn't have it tied back. He had a learned habit of mildly jerking his head to the side to remove the locks from his eyes without the use of his hands. His dark eyes were piercing, a surer sign of his smile than his mouth. He was handsome with a firm jaw and slim nose. His dark eyebrows exaggerated plentiful laugh lines, which happened to be on full display given the mirthful half-smirk and wide-eyed glint he had on his face.
Kagome wanted to die with embarrassment. "Um...hi...uh, Miroku."
He blinked at her a few times, his smile blooming. The communication happening internally between his brain and his eyes was painfully visible in those few seconds of silence. "You're...still here."
"I am." The pop of oil in the cast iron had Kagome turning off the gas range and removing the pan from the burner.
Miroku's eyes dipped to take in her outfit, which was a funny word to use given she was literally just wearing one of Inuyasha's t-shirts. Oh God, she was practically naked standing in Inuyasha's kitchen with his best friend. She could only imagine what he must think, seeing her outfit, in addition to her clearly swollen, ruddy lips and kinked sex hair.
She grew self-conscious as Miroku's gaze lingered on her bare knees. "Where," he said with a toothy smile, "may I ask, is Inuyasha?"
"He's in the, um, shower."
Miroku's face melted into a provocative smile with plenty of insinuation that had Kagome's face burning hotter than the oil behind her. He just opened his mouth to say something to her when Inuyasha came running out wearing a pair of dark grey sweatpants. His hair was still wet and dripped over his shoulders and chest.
"What the hell're you doing here, Miroku?"
Kagome smiled through her flush when Inuyasha came to stand in front of her, playing guard to her modesty. She held tightly to the Drop and smiled up at him endearingly. Now was a really unfortunate time for her to start feeling aroused. The fact her entire womanhood throbbed painfully should have made lustful interest improbable. Yet, here she was, staring up at her boyfriend with appreciation, feeling herself grow slick with interest because his default state was to be protective of her. The gorgeous brawn of his back right in front of her face, and the smell of his skin and body wash, wasn't doing her any favours either.
Miroku rubbed a hand across his chest, looking remorseful. "My apologies, my friend, I didn't think she'd—" He smiled at Kagome—"you'd, still be here. Forgive me if I've made you uncomfortable, Kagome."
"It's okay," she answered, pushing up on her toes to smile at him over Inuyasha's shoulder. Realizing she still held on tight to the spatula, she put it down on the counter.
At the same time Kagome spoke, Inuyasha demanded Miroku explain why he showed up without checking it was okay first.
Miroku smirked roguishly. "I believe you'll have four unread messages from me on your device, Inuyasha." He chuckled when the half-demon glowered at him. His eyes turned to Kagome. "Although, given the present feast for the eyes in front of me, I don't blame you for not having your phone attached to your person."
Inuyasha obviously heard Kagome's embarrassed intake of breath following Miroku's words. "What do you want, Miroku?" he asked tersely between clenched teeth.
Miroku sighed, seeming reluctant to turn his eyes away from the sight of Kagome's bare legs behind Inuyasha. "I wanted to grab a bite with my oldest friend, hear how your big night went, tell you how splendidly mine did." He smiled at Kagome who peeked at him over Inuyasha's shoulder again. "I'd dare say it's safe to assume your evening went very well, Inuyasha, given the heavenly sight I walked in to." He grinned impishly, openly dipping his head to apprise Kagome's legs.
Kagome blushed and hid her face in Inuyasha's back.
"Miroku..." Inuyasha growled warningly.
"What?" the black-haired man cried, his palms raised in defense. "She has nice legs, Inuyasha! What do you want me to say?"
"Nothing, Miroku!" Inuyasha spat. "You say fuckin' nothing!" Inuyasha turned then to face Kagome with a heavy sigh. "Kagome, can you please go and put—"
"Yeah, I'm, uh, gonna go—" She pointed her thumb over her shoulder towards the hallway. She had planned to finish her sentence by saying put on some clothes, but the look Miroku gave her had her gulping with embarrassment and racing to Inuyasha's bedroom with her sentence incomplete. She held the t-shirt down against her thighs as she ran-walked despite the ache that flared between her legs. When she paused to peer over her shoulder at Inuyasha, she saw both men standing there watching her and that encouraged her to scurry away.
Just as she closed Inuyasha's bedroom door, she heard her boyfriend rip into his friend, clarifying very loudly what he did and did not mean by giving Miroku a key to his condo for emergencies.
Kagome smiled to herself as she dressed. Despite the verbal lashing happening just down the hall, she wore a dumb smile as Miroku's words replayed over and over in her mind. He called her Inuyasha's dream girl.
She had to give Miroku credit, he was adept at handling Inuyasha's mercurial tendencies. It was a fun dynamic to observe given that Miroku ended up staying for dinner. Dressed in tights and her own t-shirt, Kagome returned to the kitchen, claiming she had more than enough food on the go to feed three. She had brought a t-shirt out for Inuyasha too, given his rush to exit the shower following Miroku's unexpected arrival. He thanked her with a kiss on her shoulder. His mood seeming gentler thanks to Kagome, Inuyasha conceded to Miroku staying. He emphasized strongly it would be a temporary visit, allowing his friend to stay only for the meal. Miroku chimed a merry, "I'll drink to that!" then helped himself to Inuyasha's wine fridge. Inuyasha rolled his eyes behind Miroku's back and Kagome giggled as her gaze met Inuyasha's, picking up where she left off with dinner.
Not that she admitted it to Inuyasha, but Kagome kind of liked that he was being a stickler about company because he didn't want to share her.
Miroku was a good help around the kitchen, chopping vegetables, keeping Kagome's wineglass filled. He was easy to laughter, bringing a brightness to the space with the pattern of his laugh: a throaty, cheerful blast followed by a tittering that simmered into an eye-tapering smile. His laugh always ended with a happy sigh, which, for some reason, kept a grin on Kagome's face. He had very expressive eyes, she realized, which accentuated his handsomeness and made him even more charming. She could only imagine how difficult a time Sango must have had navigating the assault of his flirtations for all those appointments.
Miroku was also quite talented at keeping the silences filled with his penchant for storytelling.
As she worked on completing dinner, Kagome's gaze kept flicking to Inuyasha. His eyes often already on her, she'd smile broadly at him when their stares met. Her heart escalated every time his lips curved up into an intimate little grin for her. Inuyasha was a constant presence wherever she worked, following her around the kitchen, leaning against the countertop next to her with his arms crossed. Every time Kagome had to pass him, whether to grab something from the pantry or fridge—or even just because she wanted to—she would steal a kiss from him. Sometimes, after Kagome's lips left Inuyasha's, his eyes shot to Miroku with a slight colour on his cheeks. Sometimes Miroku flourished his eyebrows at Inuyasha or winked at him to tease him. Other times, the man did nothing, a sad little smile on his face like he wished he could secure the kind of easiness that Kagome and Inuyasha had worked for and waited to find.
Once the meal was ready, the three sat down at Inuyasha's rounded dark oak table. Kagome did her best not to wince as she sat given how sore she was. Inuyasha smirked at her knowingly and she intentionally did not make eye contact.
Throughout dinner, Inuyasha kept his hands to himself but his feet kept straying over to her. It was never more than toes touching or a graze of his ankle or heel. But it kept a warmth in Kagome's chest, knowing that he desired to touch her. As she ate, talked, and laughed with the men, Kagome absentmindedly found herself touching or holding the Drop often. Almost every time she did so, Miroku observed her with a gentle smile creasing the outsides of his eyes. When her gaze met his knowing eye, Kagome flushed and released the pendent. Miroku, it seemed, having grown up with Inuyasha, was well aware of what the necklace meant between the two of them.
It made Kagome's heart lighten, noticing the wise and warm smiles Miroku shot to his friend. If Kagome learned one thing about Miroku as a result of his impromptu arrival for dinner, it was that he genuinely loved Inuyasha like a brother, and only wanted to see him happy. Miroku picking on him and teasing him was how he showed his brother affection. Inuyasha reciprocated with petulance and empty threats.
Dinner was fun, playful in a way Kagome wouldn't have expected given she and Miroku made a good team those few times they ganged up to tease Inuyasha. He was a good sport, her boyfriend, often snorting or rolling his eyes at her and Miroku's combined giggling. Twice, she came down from laughter with a flush on her neck and chest, winking at the look Inuyasha gave her, like she was gonna get it once Miroku left. She enjoyed nothing more than those sparse times she could lean back with her wine and watch the two men engage in a tangent about something. It made her heart flicker with warmth, witnessing the tangible bond they had.
Kagome was an eager listener when Miroku gave high-level details of his date with Sango. When she probed for more information, Miroku said he didn't want to spoil any details for Sango to share with her girlfriend. Kagome had leaned into her elbows, then, narrowing her eyes at Miroku suspiciously to inquire his intentions with her best girlfriend. When Miroku looked Kagome deep in the eye, he grabbed her hand between his, which Inuyasha most definitely didn't like. The man answered honestly that he'd like nothing better than to spend the rest of his life with the woman.
Kagome blushed on her girlfriend's behalf. "I-I promise I won't tell her you—"
"Oh, it's fine," Miroku said, releasing Kagome's hand to wave away her promise of secrecy. He gave her a nonchalant chuckle. "Sango is well aware of my intentions."
"Y-you told her that?"
"Of course I did."
Kagome blinked at him, taking a sip of her wine. "And...what did she say?"
Miroku smiled at Kagome over the rim of his wineglass, leaning back in his seat. "Are you sure you'd not rather hear this from her?"
"I'll still hear it from her, but I need to hear it now from you," Kagome answered quickly. "I need to know what she said."
Miroku huffed a soft laugh. Inuyasha dug in to the remnants of Kagome's dinner after she confirmed she was full and he could help himself. "She said I needed to prove it."
Kagome chewed her lip and played with the stem of her wineglass as those words sunk in. "And...if you don't mind my asking...how do you plan to—?"
"Dear, Kagome," Miroku interrupted with a cheery click of his tongue that had her smiling in response. "Inuyasha may have mentioned many things about you, but not once did he share that you're a shameless gossip."
Kagome snorted. "I'm not a gossip! I'm just looking out for my friend."
His eyes softened. "Which I will relentingly say I appreciate," he answered, his head bowing slightly with a hand over his heart. "In answer to your question, Kagome, I have given up casual dating and plan to exclusively court Sango until she accepts my proposal. I will do everything in my power to make sure she has no hesitations to accept me as her husband. I am fully committed to her, and I'm going to prove that through my unrelenting affections."
"Wait, wait, wait," Kagome gasped, her hands waving at Miroku. She had to put her wine down for this. "You...proposed?"
"I did. Three times."
Inuyasha snorted. "Couldn't accept no the first two times, huh?"
Miroku wrinkled his nose at his friend. "She changed the subject or refused to give me an answer the first two times. The third time I asked, I did so after I laid myself bare, so to speak, and clarified my intentions before asking her again. The third attempt is the one with the charm, so they say."
Kagome was speechless, directing her gaze to Inuyasha with an expression she hoped would encourage him to say something on behalf of them both. She just wanted to find her phone to call Sango immediately.
"So, she's really gonna let you woo her while she considers your proposal?" Inuyasha all but scoffed into his whiskey and cola. "And here I've been thinkin' this whole time Sango was smart to keep her distance from a womanizer like you, Miroku."
Miroku rolled his eyes. "Ex-womanizer, Inuyasha. Give credit where credit is due, my friend—"
"I'll believe it when I see it."
"—and my lady is both smart and exceptionally gracious to consider me and my affections." His smile took over his face and Kagome couldn't help but direct the warmth she felt at Inuyasha. She couldn't wait to hear about Miroku's three proposals from Sango.
"Don't you need a ring to propose?"
Miroku smirked at Inuyasha and the implication of his question. "I told her I wanted to take her ring shopping. She told me to revisit the subject in the New Year." His grin widened. Kagome gasped.
Inuyasha made a face. "I dunno whether to be surprised or impressed you didn't get an outright no from her."
"I find myself in a similar position," Miroku said warmly, his eyes closing with his smile. A newfound playfulness overtook his features and behaviour when he turned to face Kagome. His elbow thudded on the table and he dropped his cheek into his palm. "Speaking of jewelry," he began, "that is a lovely necklace, Kagome." His body facing her, his eyes snuck to Inuyasha, narrowing teasingly. "I'd love to hear more about it and its significance. I'm sure the presentation of such a gift surely makes for an enchanting story."
Inuyasha flushed, looking down at his plate before he scowled at Miroku. "I already told her what it means. And you know too, you git. Don't be an ass."
Miroku guffawed. "So, it's certainly a cause for happiness and celebration, then!" he cheered, arms raised high. "Two engagements in one weekend!"
Kagome blinked. Her head recoiled as she turned her gaze to Inuyasha, who squirmed beneath the heat of her stare. "En-engagement?"
"I know my old friend may not be the most eloquent of public speakers, but I'm sure with his explanation, Kagome, you understand the Drop is essentially an engagement ring in demon terms, yes?" He smiled widely, brandishing a bottle of wine to refill her empty glass across the table. "Or, no," he said, pausing with a contemplative furrow to his brow, "I'm mistaken. The Drop is a wedding ring for demons. Isn't that right, Inuyasha? Or am I misremembering? Either way," he chuckled, "I'd love to hear about your proposal, Inuyasha!"
PROPOSAL? Her mind screamed. No, no, no no no! He didn't propose he—he couldn't have! Inuyasha doesn't even love me. We just started dating and—
Last night had been perfect and romantic. Inuyasha had been sweet and thoughtful.
Was...was last night supposed to be...a proposal?
Too fast, a voice in her head screamed from the dark, making her heartbeat ramp up with panic. This is too fast.
It must be a joke, she thought assuredly. Hojo took years to say he loved me. There's no way Inuyasha could actually want me for the rest of his life after only a few months...
Sure, you love him, another voice uttered, but...you've always been quick to love. Maybe Inuyasha was right...maybe you are so desperate to be loved you would've said yes if Inuyasha presented you an actual question. Maybe he did you a favour by taking the guesswork out of it and just giving you a demon wedding ring equivalent.
She didn't know what hurt more, how easily the critical, self-deprecating comments came to her or how disoriented she felt having the rug pulled from beneath her feet.
Kagome's mind spun as she looked down at the pendent upon her chest.
Miroku smiled at Kagome's red face, following her line of sight. "Well, wedding necklace, I suppose. For demons, but yes. Some human-demon pairings like to host some kind of reception to celebrate the acceptance of the Drop, don't they, Inuyasha?"
"W-we—we haven't, um, talked about—" Inuyasha licked his lips— "we're not usin' the labels, Miroku," he said carefully, his face flushed. "Like, I'm not callin' her my, um—" His words fell away, watching Kagome wring her hands and fidget in her seat.
But...but...the Drop is a way to claim a non-mate. It's a claiming thing. It's not a wedding thing! Inuyasha would've said. He would've told me! He...did compare it to a ring, though, when he gave it to me. But...
No, earlier he said promise ring. It's a promise ring! Promise necklace!
Oh god, she thought, her face heating and pulse pounding, are we...essentially considered married to demonkind because I accepted the Drop?
No, that's ridiculous. There's no way he likes me enough to legitimately mean forever!
Holy shit, is he my...? Oh god, this is too fast.
"Labels," Miroku snorted, waving his hand dismissively. Clearly both men were oblivious to the fact Kagome was having an emotional existential crisis at the dinner table. "Labels are nothing but melodrama and a silly desire to claim possession of something intangible. The Drop implies forever. A wedding ring implies forever. The symbolism is lovely because of the sentiment behind it. You don't need to call Kagome your wife for her to essentially be your wife, Inu—"
"That's enough, Miroku." The hardness of Inuyasha's raised voice echoed around them. Miroku blinked at his friend, clearly missing what he had done or said to upset him so.
Kagome swallowed audibly, pushing back from the table. Breathing was incredibly difficult. "I-I'm, uh—" Her hip bumped the table as she found her feet to rise— "I-I'll be...right back."
She winced as she stood, too flustered and distracted by the thoughts in her head, Miroku's calling her Inuyasha's wife, to pay any attention to the ache in her core. Kagome entered Inuyasha's bedroom, her palms on her cheeks. She paced, trying to calm the panic that rose up her body and settled as a fierce heat in her face. Her heart was wild, fluttering and drilling like it sought escape.
She startled when Inuyasha came into the room a few minutes later. She cast him a wide-eyed stare.
"W-where's—?"
"I asked him to leave."
Kagome's shoulders fell. "Why? He didn't need to—"
"That asshole upset you, Kagome! Besides, we said he was only stayin' for the meal and it was basically over anyway." He paused in the doorway, not daring to come any closer. "Are...you okay?"
Too much, too soon. Too much, too fast, her pounding heart seemed to say.
"I don't know," she answered in a small voice. She frowned, reflecting on those words. "Actually, no, I do know. No, I'm not okay."
Inuyasha looked uncomfortable as he leaned against the doorframe. "I feel like I gotta apologize, but...I'm not sure what for." Then, he asked, "What're you thinking?"
She chewed the inside of her cheek, continuing to pace. It was easier on her panic not to look at Inuyasha. "I think I'm frustrated."
"With me?"
"With myself."
"Why?"
Kagome sighed. "Miroku filled in the gaps of my own obtuseness, Inuyasha." She shook her head. "How I'm feeling—it's my own fault. You told me forever when you gave me the Drop, and I just never put two and two together. I'm frustrated with myself for gleaning over that crucial detail."
He took a step towards her then paused, like he wasn't sure if she wanted him near her or not. "I'm not followin', Kagome."
"I'm—" She paused to lick her lips, to close her eyes for a few seconds between blinks— "I'm a little overwhelmed."
"Why?"
"Because this time yesterday, we were in an armchair trying to avoid calling each other boyfriend and girlfriend, and now I'm being made aware that accepting this necklace has made me your...your..."
Fuck, she couldn't even say it.
"No, it doesn't, Kagome. We don't have to—"
Her eyes shot to his. "But that's what it means, right? You told me it meant long term. You said it was a sign of a committed relationship." She blushed. "You said promise ring, Inuyasha. But apparently that's not fully accurate, is it? You didn't say this necklace was really more of a—"
"If I said wedding ring at any point, you would've freaked out!" He gestured at her like she was proving his point, and Kagome scoffed indignantly. "It doesn't have to be that for us, Kago—"
Her face grew hot with irritation. "But this necklace is basically a wedding ring, isn't it? For demons? It's meant to be some kind of wedding jewelry?"
He growled in the back of his throat. "You not listenin' to me? We don't need to use those labels, Kagome, we—"
"But that's true, isn't it?"
"Kagome—"
"Why won't you answer the question?" she cried, frustration making her raise her voice. She felt guilty as soon as she realized the tone she used with him.
Her anger spoke to Inuyasha's and Kagome saw his defensiveness kick in. His eyes narrowed. "Why did you freak out when Miroku called you my wife?"
"Am I your wife? Holy fuck, Inuyasha!" She sat on his bed, her mouth fallen open. "This...this is...this is a lot." She stifled a panicked breath, felt tears begin to thicken her throat. "It may honestly even be too much." She shook her head, closing her eyes when she felt the sting of tears. Her voice became breathy, soft. "It's too much, too soon. I...I haven't even gotten used to calling you my boyfriend and now I'm learning that you're actually my...my...Fuck, I can't even say it, Inuyasha!" The panic had her shouting again. When she looked down at her fingers, they shook. She gripped the unmade bed to steady herself.
"You're not my wife," he spat, "'cause you're not a demon, Kagome, and the Drop can be different for us, which you'd know if you'd fuckin' listen to a word I'm tryin' to say." He took a deep breath like he was on the edge of controlling his temper. "You were fine with the Drop when it was a symbol of a long term, committed relationship, which this is. You don't gotta—"
"You can't just give me something people use as a token of marriage and call it something else because that suits you better, Inuyasha!"
He reached for her then stopped. He raised his voice too. "So, what, you sayin' you regret accepting it now?"
She turned her face away heatedly. "I don't feel like I was given a fair representation of what I accepted. You gave me a necklace as a gift and then explained the strings attached."
"There are no strings attached!" he shouted. "You either wanna be with me or you don't, Kagome!"
"Why can't we just take this slow?" She grew angry with herself when the first tear leaked down her cheek. "You went from not wanting a relationship to basically making yourself my husband! That doesn't seem a little crazy to you? Is this not too fast for you, Inuyasha?"
"Why the fuck are you so hung up on the fact I changed my mind about you, about wanting us? Stop tryin' to hold that against me, Kagome! I want to be with you and I thought you wanted to be with me! Why are you freaking out?"
"Because this is too fast, Inuyasha!" She threw her arms out to her sides.
"Fine! Then we can slow things the fuck down!"
"What does that even mean? Is giving you back the necklace enough? Or—Oh god, is that like getting divorced in the eyes of demonkind? I don't wanna divorce you, I just want—"
He looked like she slapped him. "You...you wanna give it back?"
"I—" She started crying steadily— "Fuck, I don't even know what I'm thinking, what I'm feeling." She swiped her cheeks with her fingers. "This is too much."
"You said you were okay with forever," he said quietly albeit angrily. "Why are labels and this whole symbolism bullshit fucking with you so much?"
He flinched in response to the scowl she cast him. "With all the shit I went through—being denied a label for five years because I thought that's what I deserved—you really don't know why labels would mean anything to me?" She scoffed and closed her eyes to turn off the sight of him. She held her breath to hold back a sob. "Maybe I'm just an idiot," she hissed, her words choking on the exit, "because here I was thinking you wrote me a love letter because you knew how important labels were to me."
"I—" He stopped. He didn't know what to say to that apparently.
Kagome took a deep breath. She couldn't understand her own brain, which made her feel even more overwhelmed. Her confusion had her shoulders shaking as tears plummeted, wetting her t-shirt.
When she thought Inuyasha had a ring for her at dinner, she thought she would have said yes. She so badly wanted to be his mate, to be not just someone special to him, but to be the person who was everything to him. She loved him so much she wanted forever with him.
So, what was the issue here? Where was this panic coming from? Why was this white hot fear taking over everything she thought she wanted?
Was her brain just this seriously fucked up? Was panic simply her knee-jerk reaction, her go-to response after years of being a learned behaviour?
Was she really just angry at Inuyasha for not being fully transparent about the significance of the Drop—for feeling like she stumbled into an important role in his life?
Was this just her acting out because being called his wife was one more way to rub it in her face she wasn't his mate?
Kagome felt too sleep deprived, too brain-dumb, too emotionally spent, to navigate the spider webs of her emotions right now.
She sniffled. "Why does forever matter so much to you? It's not like we're mates and forever even means anything."
The use of that word seemed to make him even angrier. "If you're losing your shit over the word wife then yeah," he scoffed, "you definitely couldn't fuckin' handle being my mate. 'Cause bein' my mate? That's not just this life, Kagome, that's finding a way back to each other in every life. Our souls would be bound together for the rest of goddamn time. And God fuckin' knows that shit would be too much for you!" Then under his breath, "I can't believe you wanted me to fuckin' bite you...like you could handle that."
A sob wrenched from her throat as his words circled her head. "Why are you being like this? Why are you being so anti-empathy right now, Inuyasha? I'm sorry I misunderstood what this—" She grabbed the pendent— "means and maybe got your hopes up. I'm sorry! But why can't you see where I'm coming from?" Thinking about his comment about biting her, her breath stuttered. "Why are you being mean?"
"Why can't you see where I'm coming from?" he shouted at her, making her eyes widen. He paced, each of his steps seeming to increase the bite of his rage. Without looking at her he said, "I'm gonna ask you for a truth, Kagome."
She crossed her arms. "Fine."
"Miroku said wife. What if he said mate?"
She blinked at him, not understanding the truth he was seeking from her. "What do you—?"
"You're losin' your shit right now because you apparently feel like you were tricked into becoming my wife—which you're not by the way, just to state again, for the fuckin' record. I wanna know if you'd feel worse if you were my mate?"
She frowned at him until she scoffed self-effacingly. "What—you want a hypothetical truth? I'm not your mate, Inuyasha."
"Just...answer the question."
"Why is this even a truth you want from me? I have absolutely no control over being your mate or not. I'd just have to accept it, wouldn't I?"
"You wouldn't." She blinked, not following. He sighed heavily when he saw the question in her eyes. "We wouldn't have to go through with biting each other to solidify the mating bond, if you didn't want to."
"You didn't want to bite me anyway," she muttered under her breath, wiping the last of her tears from her cheeks.
"It's not that I didn't want to!" he snapped, two strong ridges forming between his eyebrows from the intensity of his frown. He exhaled loudly with frustration. "Just...just answer the fuckin' question, Kagome!"
"You want to corner me into some grand reveal of how I feel about you or something? You trying to make me feel stupid for getting upset over a fucking label?"
His eyes narrowed at her, his face flushing. "Why do you hate the idea of being my wife so goddamn much?"
"I don't hate it at all, Inuyasha! I just hate feeling like I was tricked into something life-altering so immediately into our relationship. I was scared to fuck you because I was scared of developing big feelings. Now, we've literally just started our sexual relationship and some necklace has people mistaking me for your wife? I just—"
"Just what?" he snapped. "You wanna take it off?"
Her eyes flicked to his, a different type of panic starting to sprout up her spine. "What?
He held out his palm to her. "Fine. You know what? Whatever. Give it back, then."
"No, Inuyasha—" Kagome clutched the teardrop protectively in her fist. "I'm not giving it back."
"Then take it off!" he yelled. "I don't fuckin' care."
She couldn't believe what she was hearing. Kagome stood from the bed in front of him, fighting back angry tears. "But, what happens to your claim on me if—?"
He scoffed, stealing her words. "Do you even fuckin' care about that?"
"Of course I do!"
He turned away from her. "It's a simple enough solution, Kagome," he spat. "You don't wanna feel pressured into a label? Fine, then just don't wear the goddamn necklace. See if I care."
"You don't mean that," she whispered icily, tears gathering in her eyes. "You're just angry with me."
"Damn right, I'm angry!" he shouted, towering over her, his fists clenched. "You have no fuckin' clue how I feel, Kagome—all the shit that's goin' through my mind right now, talking to you about being my wife, my mate! You have no fuckin' idea how hard it was for me to suck it up and buy that stupid necklace in the first place! I wanted you—want you—so fucking bad and here you are, losing your goddamn mind over the premise that Miroku thought I used the necklace to propose to you! Yet, you're somehow fine accepting the necklace knowing it's a symbol of forever, just as long as forever is vague, though, right? How the fuck am I supposed to feel walkin' away from this conversation? Do you wanna be with me long term? Is there even a future with you as my wife? I'm not even gonna fuckin' touch on bein' mates for fear it makes you run for the goddamn hills! You're so fuckin' confusing my head's gonna explode!"
"I'm sorry!" she screamed at him, brushing past him to head for the door. "I'm sorry I'm confusing! I'm sorry I don't have it perfectly nailed down what I want! I'm sorry I'm a hot fucking mess, Inuyasha! I don't like being this way! I don't want to panic and freak out when I'm confronted with something I actually want more than anything!" She clutched the doorframe as tears shook her body. "You have no idea how terrified I am that my issues, that being like this, is going to make me lose you!" She gasped through a sob, turning her back to him. "I don't know why I panicked. I don't know why we're fighting. I'm sorry! I might not have any clue how you feel but that's because you haven't told me!"
Inuyasha grabbed for her hand, lacing their fingers and turning her to face him. As soon as he was within reach, Kagome latched her arms around his neck. She cried into his chest, his shoulder, clutching him like she was fearful she'd lose him. Apology after apology rolled off her tongue as Inuyasha gently rocked her in his arms.
"Stop. Stop apologizing, Kagome," he whispered into her hair, kissing the crown of her head. "I get it."
Kagome cupped his cheeks and drove her lips to his, kissing him desperately, messily. He kissed her back, hard. When he backed her into the doorjamb, Kagome gasped, her fingers in his hair. Inuyasha lifted her behind the knees and she obligingly wrapped her legs around his waist, settling onto his hips. She panted as he intensified their kiss, his fingers stroking her thighs and buttocks. "I'm sorry," she cried when she broke for air.
"Yeah," he sighed, his voice hoarse. "I'm sorry too."
"I don't want to give it back. I don't want to take it off. Can you forgive me?"
Inuyasha exhaled loudly through his nose, his forehead joining with hers. "There's nothin' to forgive, Kagome. I should've been clearer about what the necklace means overall so none of this caught you by surprise. I didn't meant to overwhelm you. I just—" He held the teardrop between his fingers— "This means a lot to me. This is the only way I know I have you right now."
"You have me," she exhaled, kissing him. "I'm yours, Inuyasha. Always. I'm sorry my brain is overtired and overdumb. I didn't mean to panic and get so worked up. I'll figure out how to do better with that, I promise. I'm yours, sweetheart, necklace or not, I mean it."
He kissed her. "You said you want slow? What do you need, darlin'? What can I do? This—" He kissed her again— "you and me? I need this to work. I need to make this work, Kagome."
"We work, Inuyasha," she sighed, her eyes gazing into his. "What we have? I'm a hot mess but I'm committed to making this work, Inuyasha. I just need you to be patient with me." She forced a joyless laugh. "I say slow and even I don't know what that means. Maybe just not being married the day after we officially start dating? Can we do slower than that?"
"I think I can manage that, yeah."
Kagome huffed a laugh into his smile. Her eyes paced between his, rallying herself up to say next, "It'd make me happy, Inuyasha. To answer your question, since I realized I didn't."
"What would make you happy?"
"Being your mate." She blushed. "Knowing we're not, though, it doesn't feel that embarrassing to admit because it's just a nice what if, right? But, hypothetically, if the universe had picked me for you, thought my soul complemented yours? I think that'd be the nicest thing in the world." She kissed him gently. "I think I'd like being your person."
Inuyasha was speechless. His mouth parted and eyes widened, lingering on hers like his brain was a few seconds lagging behind her words.
"Inu...yasha?" Her eyes searched his, trying to understand the look on his face. "Are you...okay?"
"Y-yeah," he said, his gaze snapping away as his cheeks flushed. "That was just...nice to hear, I guess."
She blushed. "Can I ask you something that I'm hoping will come out cute but might sound dumb?"
He smirked at her. "Always."
"Even if I'm not your mate, can I be your person anyway?"
Inuyasha's face illuminated with the smile that creased his eyes and showed both rows of teeth. Kagome felt her heartrate escalate. "She likes me that much?" he said into her lips, gripping her thighs tighter.
Kagome nodded, brushing his bangs from his forehead before she leaned forward to kiss him. "She likes you that much."
"Would you consider it too fast if I asked you to stay the night again?"
She grinned at him. "No, I think that should be okay, especially considering I packed thinking I'd be staying the weekend."
His eyes brightened. "She wants to stay the weekend?"
"She doesn't hate the idea."
Inuyasha snorted a laugh. "What about staying the week? Would that be too fast?"
Kagome rolled her eyes, reaching up to lovingly stroke one of his ears. "I do like my apartment too, Inuyasha."
"Then—" His eyes closed with pleasure from the motion of her fingers— "how about next week we stay at your place?"
Kagome giggled loudly. "You're coming up with a sleeping schedule for us, are you?"
"Why not? Unless...that's too fast?"
"No, I—" She paused to smile, to let the words catch up with her— "I think I just really like hearing that you want to see me every day."
"Of course I wanna see you every day." He kissed her gently, cupping the back of her head while he carried her to bed. "I just got you, Kagome. And now that I found my person? There's no way in hell I'm gonna let her go." He kissed the tip of her nose before he laid her down on the bed. Inuyasha climbed over her body and cradled her hips with his. He leaned his weight into his right forearm as the knuckles of his other hand stroked down the side of her face. "'Cause I'm gonna get my forever, Kagome. Even if gotta take my sweet time to get there."
When she melded their bodies together to kiss him, Kagome wasn't surprised to find Inuyasha hard for her.
She was surprised, however, that given all the talk about her hypothetically being his mate, she couldn't recall hearing Inuyasha deny it.