Chapter 1: Awakened as a Hobo in Orario.

Fuck, my head hurts.

I groggily get up from the floor? Ground? Anyway, I get up from where I lain down and find myself to be in a stinky back alley of some sort. Fuck me, do I just got mugged?

I checked myself up and found that I had nothing but old rags wrapping up my body. Wow, did they just steal my clothes too and for some reason dress me up in rags as an act of small mercy?

Wow gee, great service there, you fucking mugger.

Wait. Who the hell am I anyway?

I tried hard to recall but couldn't remember anything. I can recall simple basic shit just fine. Aeroplanes can fly. Cars use petrol. Kardashians was famous for some reason. Stuff like that.

Shakily, I walked out the backalley, and found myself in somekind of medieval-but-not-really town. Am I in some kind of a tourist trap or something?

Then I saw friggin elves, people with animals ears and tails, and a bunch of people with trashy anime armors and weapons walking past the road I find myself in.

I take a deep breath and sigh.

Motherfucker. I just got isekaid, isn't it?

"FUCK YOU! I DESPISE LN WITH THEIR LAZY WORLDBUILDING AND HORRIFICALLY BLAND AND BORING PLOT!!!", I screamed my whole heart to the sky.

People just move on, not paying much of a glance to me. Random crazy hobo, they just assume. Oh fuck off!

I tapped my bare foot as I'm thinking my course of action to survive. Isekai is trash but frankly, its an easy world to survive in. All you need to do is to rely on your ever reliable isekai hax, System sama!

"System open!"

……

……..

……….

"Open Menu!"

…….

……….

………….

Welp. I'm fucked.

))))))3 days later))))))

I think the perk of not remembering my personal memories of Earth is that without anything to refer to, I couldn't think I am having anything worse than before.

For the past 3 days, I had been surviving by eating moldy bread and whatever rotting food I could dig up from the trash can.

Surprisingly modern for them to have waste management, huh?

It seems like this body is accustomed to living in this condition. My stomach is pretty much made of iron considering I was pretty sure I ate trash that has enuff pathogens to kill half of Europe. My theory was whoever knocked me up in the head had somehow unlocked partial memories from my previous life as an Earthling, leading me to now have the knowledge of a fucking weeb to aid my survival here.

Fucking hell. Of all knowledge I could have get, I have the knowledge of a weeb. Hardly the most useful knowledge to have. Oh goody, I know that by keep screaming like a constipated baboon, Goku become stronger. Totally useful knowledge here, folks.

For now, I just stare at the tall ass tower piercing clouds at the center of this metropolis.

For fucks sake, of all places I could get isekaid into, I got sent into the fucking Danmachi LN of all places?!!

For fucks sake… am I a shitty OC in a shitty fanfic?

At least give me some hax! I am operating on Hell Mode here! Isn't OCs supposed to have all the convenient cheats they needed to be an absolute wanker of a power fantasy, getting all the hot chicks and all that?

I sighed. Well at least I wasn't sent to Naruto. Being a hobo no one gives a shit about is at least better than being forced into Murder Gremlin School so that I can get brainwashed into a brainless drone.

Alright, let's see what we have here, folks.

First of all, I sort of get the gist of the timeline here now.

[Wanted: Blood Gale]

[Bounty: 80 million]

{Note: for ease of currency comprehension, assume 1 Vali = 1 USD}

I stare at Ryuu Lion wanted poster. I must have been sent so much further back in time and in the middle of the peak of Ryuu's rampage over…. Whoever the hell murdered her Familia.

I only watched Danmachi once okay, and only because season 4 came out and I really liked that elf woman. Any character voiced by Hayami Saori is a treasure and deserves to be protected. Personally, I didn't like Danmachi as a story that much. I just liked the concept of it overall.

Man, how long would it be until Bell came around and the canon timeline starts? I was hoping I could just piggyback him to powerlevel and get carried by his plot armor.

Now, I am 5 years away from that hax. Looking at my prospect as a professional hobo, I don't think I have a bright future here.

Man, I gonna have to figure something out before this fucked up city swallowed me up.

))))))one week later))))))

I never read the wiki, but I found Orario to be stupidly massive. The distance between the Babel Tower to the city walls is about 30km in radius.

Holy fuck, this fucking city is enormous. Tho its probably mostly because the population had to extend outward because they somehow did not figure out the concept of 30 floors apartments and had instead just keep making 3 floors housings at most.

How the fuck you build that stupidly tall tower yet didn't figure out budget apartment buildings is beyond me.

Besides, most of what lead to the massive city border was because of top class Familias taking huge chunks of space for private use.

I found the abandoned church at the outskirts of the…. Let's say poor people district. As I thought, Hephaestus had not cleaned the area for Hestia yet and the place was a den of hobos like me. Its full of skeletor like me that had been starved to near death and those who looked a bit healthy are speedrunning their death by chugging on opium smokes to escape reality. Not that I judge em much for it. There's nothing but misery for us hobos here.

Anyway, I had decided on my name.

Soren Ravencroft. Sound chuuni as fuk, but it would do. I'm in an anime anyway. May as well pick up the culture.

My best bet for a better life is to make a covenant with a god and starts my grinding. But, where can I find a god that will accept a noname hobo like me.

Oh, I have an idea. It's a stupid one but it is an idea.

))))))2 days later))))))

"Handy for you to join us, Soren Ravencroft."

Zanis Lustra, captain of Soma Familia handily accepts my application.

"Well, I heard you're looking for some new batches of Supporters so here I am."

"Its good to see a homeless like you finally doing some incentive to turn your life around. Under Soma Familia, your life will change now, Soren!"

Yea sure. As your drugged up overglorified miner that is.

You see, I always think the term Adventurer to be kinda ironic in Orario. You go into a hole in the ground, hack some monsters and brought back a bunch of magic rocks.

Doesn't that make you miners?

"Anyway, lets meet Lord Soma so that you become a new member of our family!"

Man, this piece of shit really play up his friendliness for his soon to be caught in the web prey. Well, I tried looking for other deadbeat gods to join forces with, but my search found nothing. Unless I'm joining some evil gods, my only choice is to join deadbeats that couldn't give a shit like Soma.

I just going to have to count on My willpower to overcome Soma Wine addiction that this four eyes gonna feed me later.

It's a shame I didn't see Liliruca around. Probably busy scamming some poor bastards in the dungeon. I was hoping to make contact with her.

Zanis handles whatever talk he needs to with Soma, and the god later gestured me to sit. I really didn't get what's so godly about them. They felt just like regular people really. Mortals in Danmachi were supposed to be able recognized the gods by just their sheer presence, but I'm sure as hell didn't get it. Other than being weirdoes, I don't see what exactly made them different than mortals.

Soma began his ritual whatever to contract with me and plant his divine essence, only to stop midway.

"leave", the god says.

"Lord Soma?", Zanis was confused as I am.

"This child is already under contract with another. I cannot bind with this one."

Zanis then looked at me with a glare for wasting his time.

Oh for fucks sake. What now.

)))))))))

So, Plan Join Soma Familia is a bust.

Damn it. This fanfic really doesn't make things easy for me huh? Its one roadblock over another. Would it kill you to just let me have it easy?

Now, apparently I already have a contract, and now I am staring at a broken mirror I found in the junkyard. I looked over the status screen on my chest, reflected by the mirror.

Motherfucker, my status screen was on my chest this whole time.

Anyway, I read the unique system I am operating with. There's a simple manual to explain how my System works.

First, unlike Adventurers, I don't level up kicking monsters ass and build up exp points.

I grew strength by consuming magic crystals.

Well ain't that a bitch? The fanfic basically tell me that the only way for me to gain power is to literally choke myself with money.

By eating magic crystals, I build up Stat points. Which I then can redistribute to my five main stats.

STR, END, AGI, MGI, DEX.

Well, at least I can just level up in the dungeon, not needing a god to update my status. As long as I carry a mirror, which acts as my system interface, I can level my stats anytime anywhere.

I checked my status screen.

Name: Soren Ravencroft

Level: 1

Title: The Hobo of Orario

SP: 0

STR: 0

AGI: 0

DEX: 0

END: 0

MGI: 0

Skill: None

I sighed. Man, I am fucked. Even with a system, I am still a random hobo.

))))))))the next day))))))))

In the first phase of my plan, I need to look like an actual rookie instead of a hobo.

So I went and steal some clothes. Not my fault you didn't pick up your laundry after dark. Do not underestimate a desperate man in need of eating something other than trash for once.

Actually, am I a man? I don't know if I am just malnourished or I really am just some teenager. Eh, I'll figure it out once I got some meat on my bones.

After wrapping myself up in clothes and a cloak to cover as much as my skeletal frame I could, I went to the Babel tower and wait by the dungeon entrance.

What, you think they bother put a guard to prevent dumbass like me from entering? That would be a waste of time. Most people are not stupid enuff to enter the dungeon without the power of a god flowing through their veins.

Most people aren't me.

I waited until a particularly large group of really strong Adventurers enter, and I quickly follow behind them.

Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Orario Express.

The overleveled bastards just ran through all that First Floor monsters like a train and didn't even bother to pick up the cheap ass Magic Crystals dropping around like snow.

Crystals that is now I am munching like my life depends on it. I just keep eating it by the fistful, shoving those damned stones not caring how insane that made me looked. Fucking thing was worth 0.1 points each.

Assuming it works like this, each stone SP value increase by the increment of 0.1 each floor.

And through Orario Express, I ate enuff rocks to give me 50 SP. Right when I got to the entrance of Floor 4

Without wasting my time, I pull out my mirror and reflect the crest on my chest, and the menu screen formed on the mirror. I immediately assigned 20 to AGI, 10 to END, 10 to DEX and 10 to STR and bolted out of there.

Holy fuck, I got out just before the floor respawns! The stats increase really helped me out.

Alright. One more time.

I wait for the next round of Orario Express to come.

)))))))3 days later)))))))

It took a while, since Orario Express doesn't really come by that often, but eventually I reached even stats of 100 across my main 4 stats. Don't have any Magic to bother invest in MGI right now, so I'll reserve that up for later.

However, to start my career as a professional miner in Orario, the biggest mine in the world, I need to be a registered member of the Guild. I know some people that involved in smuggling operations with magic rocks and monster drops, but I don't fancy myself going into too much of a Rogue class stereotypes, despite aiming for that playstyle. I want to get full price for my works instead of getting ripped off by black market scums.

So here I am, scamming Rose Fennet about my totally not dubious paperwork.

"So, you're saying that your god is out of town and sent you to do all the paperwork to register your one man Familia?"

"Yep, that's it."

"A one man Familia called White Raven Agency, patron by a god named Malsumis?"

"Very minor god. Even most gods doesn't know he exist."

Hah, I bet you don't know where I got that name from.

"Why didn't you just register as Malsumis Familia?"

"Because that sounds lame."

Rose sighed. I read about her in brief in fanfic sometimes and from what I know, she was a jaded Guild clerk that got too tired with Miners under her advisory to die one way or another over stupidity. However, since I am 5 years early to the canon, she had yet reached the breaking point I supposed.

"Well, we had you tested and you do have the strength of an Adventurer, so at least you are not a fraud. This would be easier if you just let us see your Falna."

"Nope. I am very shy about my back. Its ugly."

"Whatever. Anyway, congratulations, Soren Ravencroft. You and White Raven Agency is now open for business and your private bank account is now activated. Happy adventuring and all that."

"Oh before that, can I get a beginner manual or something?"

"Manual?"

"You know? A book to explain the basic stuff? What monsters in is on what Floor? Their strength and weakness? Recommended strategy?"

Rose has this face where she is both confused and realized something big.

"Don't tell me you guys didn't figure out to compile a guidebook, especially for a newbie like me?"

"Err….. let me call my manager."

Oh for fucks sake!

And you guys had the gall to complain that most Miners dies like mayflies in the beginning of their career!

You guys don't even give them a manual!

)

)))

)

Name: Soren Ravencroft

Level: 1

Title: The Hobo of Orario

SP: 0

STR: 100

AGI: 100

DEX: 100

END: 100

MGI: 0

Skill: None