"They're starting to break through the barricade!"
"Their numbers are growing… Even our soldiers are being taken!"
"Hold your fire! There may still be a way to save them…!"
"It should be able to hold them off until… Prince!"
"The Prince has returned!"
"Dear Prince, please hurry… My father… My father is amongst them!"
"Her Highness' sorcerer has summoned me here… Where is she now?"
"Thank goodness you made it, young prince… There is something that I wish to discuss with you."
"If it is what I think it is… S-Surely there must be another way!"
"It is the only way! And don't call me Shirley. That's Sorcerer Phanto to you, young Prince Cabochon."
"But the Royal Family! They–"
"We have no other choice as of now. In order to save the people of this kingdom, to save the royal family from themselves… It must be done."
"... I-I understand…"
"I'm deeply sorry, Prince Cabochon… Now quickly! We must gather the others before it is too late…!"
• •
Larry rummaged through a large cardboard box in the castle's storage room. "Darn it! I could've sworn it was in here somewhere!"
It was a lazy Sunday afternoon in Darkland. Hot, as always. Surprisingly, the castle was quiet-ish. Low rumbles of ambiance and the sound of flowing lava permeated the halls, offering somewhat of a respite from being too quiet. Minions alike were talking amongst themselves. Some were plotting strategies for the next attack on the Mushroom Kingdom. Others were just resting for the day. Even the Koopalings and Bowser were scattered all over the castle and out and about, taking on different tasks of their own. For Larry in particular, he was going through his old things in hopes of finding a spare tennis racket.
"I swear, these stinkin' things always vanish when you want to find them! UGH!" Larry dug through the box some more, finding belongings like his old ice skates, some farming books, and several bowling balls. Naturally, he tossed those things behind him, making quite a mess. He was destined to find what he was looking for, even going as far as climbing into boxes.
"Nothing in that box… I searched through everything in here! Seriously, it's gotta be around here somewhere…" Larry looked around for other boxes to rummage through. All the boxes were tampered with…that was until he found one more box. A box that gave off a strange black aura.
"...How'd I miss that one?" Larry approached the box nonchalantly, tearing it open. Inside the contents were unlike anything he'd seen. There were some old tomes, some tattered armor, and…a crystal heart. Larry picked up the crystal heart, staring at it intently. "Man, I swear… The big guy will collect anything these days…"
The crystal heart glowed and pulsed in Larry's hand. It was like those crystal hearts that Bowser, Mario, Luigi, and Princess Peach painstakingly sought after a while ago, something Bowser couldn't stop bragging about. Though, this crystal heart was vastly different than the ones they collected. This crystal heart was a fuchsia color with black smoke writhing within it, glass spikes adorned along the sides of it. These were all qualities that the normal crystal hearts were missing. Larry poked one of the sharp spikes and retracted his hand.
"Okay, so, I found this freaky thing... But it's not my tennis racket, so I don't care." Larry, having been done looking at the mysterious object, tossed the crystal heart backward towards all the other junk, a fatal mistake. As the heart hit the ground, it shattered into several pieces.
Larry slowly turned around in shock before rushing over to the cracked pieces. "AGH! Way to go, me! You broke Lord Bowser's creepy thingamajig AND you got a big, sharp mess to clean up! The big man's gonna flip his shell!"
He looked around for a broom and dustpan, or at least anything he could use as one. On the ground, the fog from within the heart swirled and coalesced. It coagulated into an unknown silhouette before it formed into a ghost-like figure. Larry watched in awe and fear at the feat taking place before him. Slowly but surely, a red entity was made out of the smoke!
"...Whew! 'Bout time I got out of that thing!" she yelled. She opened her eyes and immediately locked onto Larry…
"Uh…" Larry stammered backward, nearly tripping on some of the junk he had tossed earlier.
"...You." The entity moved in closer to Larry, almost becoming face-to-face with him. "You set me free, didn't you?" She asked. Larry closed his mouth before speaking. "Uh, yeah. I did. But, you can go back in there now! Let's pretend this never happened, okay?" The red entity got right in his face again.
"Not so fast! I'm looking for a prince! You're the only one I see around here so you must be one!" Larry's eyes widened. "Huh? Whoa! You got the wrong idea! I'm not a prince! I'm a…actually, I dunno what I am! Am I a baron like Ludwig? Technically–"
"Shut up, Prince Meat!" the red entity shouted. "Royalty or not, Mom says I gotta find a prince soon and you happen to be the lucky candidate!"
Suddenly green and yellow entities came out of the smoke.
"You're going to s-scare him off… S-Sorry, Mister Prince!" The yellow entity spoke.
The green one stood between the others and Larry, scolding them. "Settle down, all of you. It is ultimately the prince's decision on who his suitor will be."
"...I ain't no prince!" yelled Larry.
Five more entities coagulated from the smoke.
"Whatever!" The purple entity piped up. "You're one of ours and that's final, bud! If anything, I deserve this prince!"
"OOOOOHOHOHO! What a wild imagination you have!" A white one butted in. "I am the rightful heir to our kingdom, therefore the prince belongs to me!"
A light blue one interrupted the white entity. "Dream on! I'd wager this prince is mine and mine alone. So, I suggest you all just back off!"
Lastly, a grey entity formed. She held out her hands to Larry. "Ah! Don't be alarmed, darling prince! Come. Let's hide away together from the rest of my siblings," she said.
Larry was speechless. All the entities began bickering over Larry.
"HEY! SHUT UP! I saw him first, so I got first dibs! Ha!"
"You? PLEASE. You won't spoil him like I will!"
"He wouldn't wanna be spoiled by you! You'd just get 'em things you want!"
"I believe you all lack the intellect to be with this prince."
"Intellect? LOOK AT HIM."
"HEY! I resent that!" yelled Larry. As the bickering continued between the silhouettes and Larry, a larger entity began coagulating. Larry caught sight of it from the corner of his eye and backed away, donning his shocked expression again. The large silhouette's voice echoed through the room as it spoke…
"Now now, darlings. Take it easy. You all are so frivolous! Don't worry, you'll each get your chance with this prince!" The large figure turned around to face Larry as she corralled her children. "Well, well... Look what we have here! You must be the one my precious children are fighting over. I must say, they could have chosen…better." Larry just scowled.
"Ah, but a prince is a prince, no? Thank you ever so much for breaking us out of that dreadful prison of ours. I must say, it was getting quite stuffy in there. Oof! Do you know how long we've been in that thing?" Larry looked at the shattered heart.
"Were you planning on seizing this land, too?" The large silhouette giggled.
"Look, I have no clue what you're talkin' about! I'm just trying to find my tennis racket!" said Larry. "Only land we ever tried to seize is the Mushroom Kingdom. And it's really hard to do that! Of course, we seized other lands in the past. Been a while since I thought about this, hmm… Would you count a temporary takeover as–"
"SILENCE!" The room practically shook as the entity suddenly raised its voice. It turned to face the smaller ones, lifting its arms up. "Now then, my children! Listen up! I do believe "the time" has come yet again! We've failed once before, but your prince here has given us yet another opportunity to claim the land once more!" yelled the fuchsia silhouette.
Larry looked around himself in terror. What on earth did he unleash?!
"I know how much you all long to claim the throne after I'm gone, but you must understand that this is for the good of the family. Now, my darlings, prove your worth! Let this prince know how much you adore him and unleash havoc upon this land once more!"
As if on cue, the seven colorful entities all flew off in fits of laughter throughout the castle. As they flew off, black smoke filled the halls and rooms. The sheer force broke through the castle windows. As the entities made it out of the castle, they all disbursed, each setting out to claim different locations all over the kingdom.
The larger silhouette laughed and then turned its attention back to Larry. "Now. My little darlings have all run off, ready to show you how much they adore you. Doesn't it make your little heart flutter?"
"NO?!" yelled Larry. "I've never been this scared in my entire life! You're saying things I don't understand, you keep calling me a prince, I broke that heart thing, and I still can't find my tennis racket!"
"ENOUGH! Listen well, little prince..."
"My name's Larry!"
"You should be honored we'd want anything to do with the likes of you. You're nothing like the previous prince my darlings fawned over. Be grateful."
The entity turned away from Larry. "And now, I myself must depart from this stuffy place. I'm certain we'll meet again. Preferably as the new heir to the throne. Farewell, little prince!"
"It's LARRY!" Larry yelled once more.
As the silhouette approached the window, it paused, turning back around to face Larry once more before its departure. "...One last thing before I depart. Heed my warning, little prince. Don't break their hearts." And with that, the large silhouette disappeared in a puff of smoke.
Larry kind of just…stood there. "...Dude. That was crazy! How am I gonna fix this mess?! I-I-I'm gonna have to hightail it outta here ASAP! Make a new name for myself! Dye my hair! Live off the grid or something! Yeah, that'll work! Cause if the big guy finds out I broke his weird, evil heart thingy, I'm doomed!"
Suddenly, less sinister smoke came from the shards of the broken heart. It coagulated into a much smaller, much friendlier-looking entity. He opened his eyes and scanned the room.
"Uhhh… Wait! I can fix this thing!" Larry fished for his wand out of his shell. "I can just glue it back together with magic somehow!" He turned around and was met with the heart-shaped entity.
"AAH!" Larry shouted.
"AAH!" shouted the small entity.
The two backed away from each other.
"Come on! How many of you were in that thing?! It's like a clown car for ghosts!"
The floating heart looked around until he spotted the shards of the broken heart. He started to panic. "No. Oh no! NO! This is not good. Not! Good! I shouldn't be out here! But I am out here, which means they're out there. …Which also means she's out there, too! No no no, we can't go through this again! Not again!" The entity turned to face Larry once more. "You! You did this, didn't you?!" he shouted. "Do you realize what you've done?!"
"No, dude! Okay, well, yeah. But also no!" Larry exclaimed. "I was just trying to find my tennis racket! I didn't think that thing would break like that! Okay, I did. But I didn't think all of…this…would happen!" Larry made a vague gesture with his hands.
"What you've done is freed the previous royal family's spirits! Their mother has manipulated them into fighting over the throne," said the heart entity. "They're all after a capable suitor to claim the throne and rule over the land and–" "Whoa! Slow down, there!" Larry said. "They already said all that to me!"
"They did?! Wait, that can only mean one thing… They think you're the new prince!"
"Tell me about it! All they did was call me prince this and prince that. UGH!"
"...Oh, we're doomed!"
"Hey, hey! Okay, just…chill for a minute, whatever your name is!
"CHILL!? YOU WANT ME TO JUST–" The floating heart stopped what he was doing, took a deep breath, and collected himself.
"Alright... My name is Lovure, the keeper of the Beryl Heart. The heart you shattered. What you just saw were the previous royal family's spirits, Queen Beryl and her children, the Beryllites. That heart wasn't a mere trinket... It acted as a place of containment for the royal family. Not only did it contain them, but it also contained the airborne virus that they weaponized to terrorize their kingdom. Now that that heart is broken, everything's been unleashed into the world again!"
Larry's eyes widened. "Virus?! What do you mean virus?!"
"Listen very closely. This is no ordinary virus! The–" As Lovure was about to explain further, yelling could be heard from the hallway.
"Sounds like that came from the hallway!" Larry opened the door and took a peek out into the hallway. Lovure followed close behind. "Shhh!" Larry crept towards the end of the hall and peeked around the corner. At the end of the other hall were two Hammer Bros. They had their backs turned. Larry sighed and exited stealth mode.
"Hey! You two! What're you doing over there?" yelled Larry. No response. "Hey, I'm talking to you!"
Suddenly, the two Hammer Bros turned around… but they looked different. They were covered in crystal-like veins with beating heart nodules on their chests. They inched closer to Larry and Lovure as they groaned. Lovure hid behind Larry. "...Oh no! They've been infected!" Lovure whispered.
Larry… just screamed. "AAAAAHHH, WHAT'S WRONG WITH THEM?!"
"That's the virus' doing! They're in a 'zombified' trance-like state! See those hearts in their eyes? Everything they see is rose-tinted! Literally! Don't get too close or they'll infect you, too!" Lovure stated.
"All they can think about is love! And murder!" said Larry.
"NO! Well, theoretically they could, but… no! Stop distracting me!" said Lovure.
Larry took out his wand once more. "I can just blast 'em, right? Teach 'em a lesson!" Larry stood out in front of the Luv Bros. "Hey! Weirdos! I'm gonna knock some sense into you two!" Larry fired some blasts from his wand at the Luv Bros. It knocked them back, but the Luv Bros retained their zombified state.
"It's no use! Regular magic won't work to rid them of the virus!" Lovure said. He sighed.
"I didn't want to have to do this, but I have no choice." The Luv Bros. edged even closer. "Listen. There's a very special weapon that can save them and rid them of the virus. At this point, it's the only option we have. I can't lend this to just anyone…but I'm entrusting you with it. Do you understand?" Lovure asked.
"YES! Whatever it is, YES!" shouted Larry.
Lovure exhaled. He created a ball of light in front of Larry. It flashed in a multitude of colors before fading, creating a stained-glass orb that sat in front of Larry. The orb popped, causing a pink and gold firearm to fall into his hands. "A gun?!"
"This…is the Heartbreaker. It was made for eradicating the virus without harming the host," Lovure said. "See those hearts on their chests? That is where you must aim. You must 'break their hearts', so to speak. Now, I've concluded… that you are the chosen one."
"Me?!"
"Yes! You're the one I've chosen to clean up this awful mess you started!"
"...With a gun?!"
"YES!"
Larry stood in front of the Luv Bros. with a look of uncertainty. He could feel the weapon pulse in his hand. The Luv Bros were dangerously close to Larry. He sighed and put on his game face. "Alright!"
"Now BREAK THEIR HEARTS!" shouted Lovure.
The Luv Bros. lunged at Larry, to which he dodged. He fired a few shots at one of the Luv Bros., missing the first initial shots. "Drat!" The other Luv Bro tried to apprehend Larry. Larry kicked the Luv Bro away, firing more shots at them. "I'm missing every shot, dude!"
Lovure spoke up. "Remember, aim for their hearts!"
"Right!"
Larry fired more shots at the Luv Bros, fending them off and pushing them back with the handle of the Heartbreaker. The Luv Bros were determined to defeat Larry and turn him. One of them went in for a bite, to which Larry dodged. "WHOA!"
The other Luv Bro was preparing for another lunge at Larry. Larry fired some more shots, hitting the heart nodule. The Luv Bro collapsed to the floor as the crystal veins disintegrated. Larry fired more shots at the other Luv Bro, hitting him in the heart nodule, as well, causing him to collapse to the floor with his comrade.
"Sweet! Larry: one; zombies: zero!" exclaimed Larry.
"Well! Good work! I must say I had nearly zero faith in you but you handled the Heartbreaker fairly well!" said Lovure.
The Hammer Bros. both got up off the floor.
"Urgh... What happened?"
"Yeah, why do I feel like I got hit by a truck?"
"You two were infected. Lovesick, if you will," said Lovure. "You were hit with a nasty virus that put you two in a zombie-like state!"
"Really? That's sick!
"Literally!"
"No, it was NOT– Okay, maybe it was a little cool." Larry was interrupted as more shouting came from another room. Amongst the noise was a very familiar shout, followed by a very familiar giggle.
"Larryyyy? Are you out here?" A voice called out.
"So, your name's Larry?" Lovure looked towards the koopa. "Yyyyep! The one and only!" Larry proudly pointed to himself. "And my brother Iggy's over there! Unless that wasn't him shrieking." He walked closer to the other end of the hall. "Yo! Iggy! You gotta come see this! I found–"
"Larry…! C-Check me out!" It was Iggy… who was also infected! His heart nodule created thorny vines that wrapped around his hair and body. "I feel… BAHA! I feel real weird right now, Larry…!"
He inched towards Larry, who honestly didn't think things could get worse from this point. "YEAH, I BET!"
"Urgh, can you… check if I got… a fever…?!" Iggy got closer, the crystals on his wand forming a segmented sword of sorts.
Larry backed away. "Whoa, Iggy! Ya gotta snap out of it!" Larry tried his best to help Iggy come to his senses, but it didn't work. Iggy kept inching closer and closer until…he charged at him, brandishing his wand.
Larry dove out of the way of the attack just in time. "Oh dear!" said Lovure. He got out of the way and gave Larry some room. "This is quite the sibling fight, no?"
"Don't worry, dude! Iggy and I fight all the time!" Larry said before he dodged another attack from his brother. Iggy lunged again and Larry tried holding him off a bit. "Rrgh! This is… different, though…!"
Larry jabbed Iggy in the gut, causing him to stammer backward a little bit. Larry aimed the Heartbreaker at Iggy, trying to get a good lineup at the heart nodule, but Iggy had other plans. Larry shot the Heartbreaker at his brother.
"L-Larry… Check this out…! BAHAHA!" Iggy deflected the shots with his crystal sword. "...Okay, I'll admit, that was really cool!" exclaimed Larry. With Larry's guard down, Iggy took the opportunity. He lunged at Larry, jabbing him in the gut with the hilt of his crystal sword as revenge. Larry fell backward but got right back up. He tried shooting Iggy again, to which he deflected the shots.
"Hey! Heart dude! Do something!" shouted Larry.
"Do what exactly?!"
"I dunno! Something! Uhhhh… Distract him somehow!"
"...HOW?!"
Larry got pushed to the ground again and Iggy approached him with a smile. He brandished the wand, the sword segments extending into some sort of whip. "N-No fever or headache… What do… you think it is, Larry?" It seemed like it was almost over for Larry. All the times Larry won fights against Iggy, this'd be the first one he'd lose in a long time…
…That was until Lovure intervened. He whistled at Iggy.
"H-Hey, Iggy!" shouted Lovure. Iggy turned his attention to Lovure. "Uh… H-how do you like this?!" Lovure paused for a moment before doing a funny dance. He made faces at Iggy in the hopes that it'd distract him enough for Larry. The infected koopaling stood there and stared at Lovure for a while, frozen. Lovure stopped his funny dance. Larry just… gave Lovure a look.
"...Did it work…?" asked Lovure softly.
"Ha… Baha…BAHAHAHA!" Iggy flew into a giggle fit. He fell over laughing, putting himself into a vulnerable position.
"Larry! Now!" yelled Lovure.
Larry aimed the Heartbreaker at the nodule and took the shot. The nodule burst violently. All the vines melted away instantly as Iggy laughed away on the floor and his wand returned to normal. Larry sighed in relief. "Phew…"
"BAHAHA– Huh? Hey! My weird sick feeling's gone! Hurray!" Iggy popped up like nothing happened. "Larry! Is that little heart guy what you wanted to show me? I'm not even gonna question the gun!"
"I'm Lovure! It's a pleasure!" Lovure did a little spin.
"Awwww, aren't you precious? BAHA! We gotta save being cutesy for later though… Some weird scary fog is turning the castle, well, scary!"
"We know! It's an airborne magical virus turning everyone into lovesick zombies, as it were. Let me explain…"
Lovure told the story about how Larry broke the Beryl Heart and the royal family who were wreaking havoc as they spoke. He mentioned the Heartbreaker and how it was the only cure for the virus. "...And that's the story. So far, we've saved two people from the virus, but who knows how many more are lovesick!"
"Wow. So it's all Larry's fault!" said Iggy. "Larry, you got some MAJOR cleaning up to do BAHAHA!"
Larry sighed exasperatedly. "Don't remind me, dude."
"So now we have to find where Queen Beryl and the Beryllites ran off to. They could be anywhere!" Larry thought for a moment. "If I were some weird spooky ghost things, where would I go?"
"The Weird Spooky Ghost Thing Store." Iggy smiled.
"Very funny," said Larry.
"What should we do? We have no leads right now…" said Lovure. The group fell silent for a moment before Lovure sprung up, remembering something very important. "Larry, I need you for a minute. Just trust me" Lovure conjured up something in front of Larry. Suddenly a flash of light burst before fading away. A heart-shaped brooch appeared in front of Larry's eyes. "Whoa."
"This is a special brooch designed to detect high concentrations of the magic virus. It's tied to the Heartbreaker that you now possess. Queen Beryl and the Beryllites all infected the land with the virus, so it'll aid in our search for them."
Larry held out his hand and the brooch gravitated towards him. It sat in his hand comfortably. He took a good look at it. "Sweet!"
"Ooooooh! Larry, that brooch is sooooo cute! BAHAHA!" Iggy said.
"It's NOT cute!" Larry retaliated. "It's cool and awesome and some other third thing."
"Now, we need to make haste and find the royal family," Lovure said.
"That's great and all but what're we gonna do about the rest of the lovesick minions here in the castle? I can't fight them all off on my own. I'd get overwhelmed…and tired! Not to mention there's only one Heartbreaker! …Right?" Larry asked. "You do have a point, Larry," said Lovure. He became lost in thought for a bit.
Iggy raised his hand as if he wanted to be called upon. "Ooohh! I know! Oh, Sniiiiifiiiiits! … SNIFITS!" Promptly, a group of Snifits approached Iggy. "Yes sir?" one asked.
"You guys aren't infected right?" Iggy asked. The Snifits all looked at each other.
"N-No… Are we?"
"I don't think so. Do we have to be?"
"Nope!" Iggy raised his hands up. "You guys got masks, so you're all immune! I need you to gather aaaaall the uninfected minions and get them somewhere safe! Right now."
"Like, in the saferoom or outside or–"
"NOW! RIGHT NOW! GO!"
Iggy shooed the Snifits off, briefly chasing after them. "GO, GO, GO! NIGHTMARE! NIGHTMARE! MOVE! MOVE! AAAUUUGHHH!" The Snifits all shuffled away. "… Anyways! BAHAHA!"
"Well, that's…effective, I suppose?" said Lovure. "I should text the rest of us and tell 'em to stay alert," said Larry.
"There are more of you?" asked Lovure.
"Yeah! There're seven of us! Seven Koopalings! That's what we call ourselves! Y'know, without the seven part." Larry pulled out his phone and began texting in the family group chat. He made sure to let everybody know about the situation in the castle…without mentioning that it was all his fault, of course. "Done! Now where should we start?"
Iggy raised his hand again. "Why don't you go into town and ask the folks there, or something? I dunno, it's a free country! …Kingdom!" Larry looked at Lovure. "Well, I guess it's a start," said Lovure. "We should get going. We have a kingdom to save!"
"Alright! Time to go break some hearts!" yelled Larry.
Larry waved his wand in the air. He aimed the wand at himself, changing his appearance. He donned a purple, blue, and pink windbreaker, taking a good look at himself. "Nice!" he said. Lovure and Iggy clapped at the transformation. The brooch he was holding gravitated towards the lapel of the jacket, affixing itself to it.
"Remember, Larry. Follow your heart," said Lovure.
"Corrrrrnyyyyyyy!
The two of them were ready to set out. Iggy waved at Larry and Lovure as they left out the castle doors. "BYEEEE! Don't forget to write! BAHAHA!"
And so Larry and Lovure, with high hopes and courage, were ready to face the challenges that were soon to come.