Mariner was already annoyed by the time they had actually agreed to meet the following morning. This was because twice she'd tried to scope out some information on the Ensign they were to work with today, and twice she'd been foiled by Boimler mysteriously appearing out of the dark, accusingly whispering about "not getting us exterminated by Q". Eh. She could take him.
She was not really looking forward to this mission. Not because it didn't have the potential to be exciting, but because she had to work with someone she didn't know at all. Sure, they might be someone she actually did know who just couldn't say it - or hell, it could be some version or clone of her herself - but that wasn't really good enough for her brain to settle down.
Who knows why they'd agreed to do this with Q anyway. It just didn't sit right.
She sat down next to Boimler as usual for breakfast. No sign of T'Lyn and Sky yet. She didn't need to speak as she widened her eyes and tightened her mouth to a hard line to show what she thought of his actions last night. He replied with a sarcastic look, to which she huffed and shook her head. He was clearly getting a response ready, when his expression changed on looking over her shoulder. She turned to see T'Lyn, Sky stood just behind her still dressed as ridiculously as yesterday.
"Should we come back later?"
Boimler got to his words before her. "No! No, sit down!"
Strange, she could swear he was blushing a little.
"So, when did you guys start dating?" Sky asked brightly.
Now Mariner could feel herself blushing too. She hid behind her drink. "We're not dating, just friends."
"Oh."
T'Lyn turned to Sky. "Do not worry, it's a common mistake."
"It is?" Mariner said.
"Well of course. You spend every waking moment together, and have also been known to spend the night in each other's rooms. You use nicknames for each other and have obvious mutual attraction. Even when not together, one constantly comes up in the other's stories. Do you need me to go on?"
No, Mariner did not need her to go on. Mariner would like to squash down all her feelings into a little ball and leave them there forever. Boimler was her favourite person in the whole world, she didn't need to potentially spoil that by attempting to add something romantic and then have it go wrong. That would be unacceptable. (But wouldn't him dating someone else also be unacceptable to you?)
"Thank you, T'Lyn." She replied, with a forced smile.
They ate their breakfast in relative silence, barring Sky asking occasional questions about the recent missions they had been on. When Ransom signalled they had arrived at Bynaus, the away team grabbed their phasers and headed to the shuttle (good to have a shelter on hand, and they didn't plan on using their phasers…unless they had to).
Once in the shuttle, they left T'Lyn to fly while Boimler and Mariner changed into civilian clothes. The first part of the plan was simple - go to the museum and check what they wanted was there, how it was stored, and where the nearest exit was. They dressed the way they had when they'd been briefly grounded on Earth. Mariner wore mostly black - black trousers and jacket over a white shirt to give some contrast. Boimler wore a purple jumper matched with jeans. That man really loves purple. It was lucky for him he could pull it off so well.
"I've got my combadge hidden, but I'll call you guys in if we need you. Sit tight, and don't drink too much coffee. You can't be trembling for a heist." These words got Mariner a raised eyebrow from T'Lyn and a short laugh from Sky.
She then dropped down to the ground to join Boimler. They were in the shuttlebay for the area of Bynaus which got the most tourism, so a pair of humans didn't look that out of place, but they were certainly in the minority. A wide assortment of alien species filled the area as they made their way out onto the central arcade, which was lined with a variety of shops and places of amusement. They weaved nimbly through the crowd up to the main museum, with only a brief stop in a shop to grab Boimler something shiny that had caught his eye.
"So, what's our play?"
Mariner was caught on the back foot. "Our play?"
"Yeah! You know, our undercover identities?"
"Boims, you realise we can just go to the museum? I don't think we're going to be interrogated just for that."
"Pleeeeeease? It's so fun!"
Of course she knew it was fun, she loved it too. She just thought with how much more serious he was getting lately that we wouldn't want to play silly games with her on away missions anymore. It lit a warm glow in her chest to know he still did.
"Okay! Right, but we have to be normal people…I'll be…Nyota Jaxa, space archaeologist with a dark secret and an addiction to Taribulan pasta."
"Yes! Okay, then I'll be Archer Lightway, esteemed marksman and ace pilot. And we met when you hired me to protect you on a space archaeology expedition!"
"Excuse me?!" She bumped her shoulder into his. "You to protect me?"
"Who has the better phaser accuracy scores again?" His tone had now moved to teasing.
She knew he could absolutely outshoot her if he wanted to. Ugh. It was impressive and annoying at the same time. At least she knew one way she could win this game and turn things back in her favour. She kicked one of his legs out from under him, causing him to pitch backwards, pinwheeling his arms wildly. She then caught him easily, grinning into his wide blue eyes.
She was ripped away from her contemplation of his eyes by the sound of clearing throats. A pair of Bynars, who by their attire worked for the museum, stood just ahead of them. They split their words up seamlessly between them. "Do you wish for a tour of the museum?"
"Ah! No thanks, we will just look around ourselves!" Mariner put on her best I'm just a chill tourist voice as she pulled Boimler back to his feet, reflexively straightening his clothes before she let go. "C'mon Archer, let's get to it."
She linked her arm through his as they walked through the door. That didn't last long however, as the museum turned out to be awesome. Mariner liked to pretend she wasn't a massive nerd for alien and Starfleet stuff, but she absolutely was. She found herself smiling as they went round. It was really nice to have someone to geek out with about all the history stuff. They should do this more often.
She knew logically that they should be rushing to the artifact they were here for, but the truth was she didn't really want to rush. It's not that she didn't love Tendi - of course she did, she'd do anything for her friends - but the heist wasn't planned until darkness anyway. She had missed her away missions with Boims - in fact, it was probably what she missed most about just being an Ensign.
They were laughing together about one of the paintings (turns out alien artists had just as much trouble with their native animals as ancient Earth artists had had drawing cats) when for the second time that day they turned to face a pair of Bynars staring at them. Coincidently, it was the same pair from before, except this time they were backed up by four that seemed significantly beefier.
"Oh hi! Your museum is wonderful!" Boimler gushed. Mariner didn't think he'd noticed that this was a little weird.
The Bynars seemed a little confused by his reaction. "Thank you, sir. It is indeed an institution of pride for the planet. Could you please follow us?"
They lead them through a maze of corridors into what, at first glance, was quite a cozy room. Several big cozy chairs were arranged in a circle, each easily big enough for two people. Mariner and Boimler sat shoulder to shoulder. They'd clearly been made. Maybe someone had recognised Boimler from the call? But then, why assume he's here for nefarious reasons? You follow someone to catch them in the act if you think that anyhow.
"We hope we will be able to let you go and enjoy the rest of the museum in a moment. So, straight to business. Very recently, you inquired about the -" Mariner just decided to translate the noise that followed as "the Thing" in her head.
"Yes, that's right." She replied.
"Because you wanted it. Now it is gone."
"What?!" Mariner's voice overlaid with Boimler's as both sat up straight in shock.
"Hum. You do not have it?"
"No!" Mariner answered. "We were just here to look around!"
"Your shock seems genuine. We will just confirm this with your Captain, then you will be free to go."
Mariner caught Boimler's eye and his expression confirmed he was thinking the same thing that she was. Someone had beaten them to the punch. She didn't know why, or who, but she did know she was going to find them and beat it out of their (warm, alive) hands.
Ransom and the bridge of the Cerritos appeared on a large screen. "Ransom here, what can we do for you?"
The lead Bynar wasted no time. "Can you please confirm the reason for the presence of these officers on Bynaus?"
Ransom answered right away. "Those two? Yes, of course - they're on their honeymoon!"
Mariner silently added beat Ransom to death with his own weights to her to-do list. However, she obligingly put her arm over Boimler's shoulders and leaned into him. He was stiff for a couple of seconds before relaxing into it. She hoped the smile she'd put on her face was of the sappy romantic rather than the insane axe-murderer variety.
"Here?" The Bynars seemed a little doubtful.
"Oh yes! We just love your culture and museums!" Mariner forced out from between her teeth.
"It's true." Shax's gruff voice added. "She's been going on about it for weeks. Could barely get a word in sideways."
T'Ana got in before Mariner could object. "Yeah, and before they left I gave 'em all the prophylactics and -"
"T'ANA!" Boimler clearly wanted to know where that sentence was going just as little as she did. She now also realised he had a death grip on her thigh with the hand closest to her. She decided to let this slide, given it was from her "new husband".
"I did see them in a romantic position, ready for a kiss just outside the museum." The original pair of Bynars they'd met earlier today spoke up. "So it does seem possible."
Heads were starting to slowly nod around the room. They needed to clinch it though to really sell this. Mariner knew what she had to do.
She quickly flicked her head to the side and pressed her mouth to Boimler's before she could change her mind. She put one hand up against the back of his head at the same time in case his first reaction to the surprise would be to catapult into the air with surprising athleticism (like he did to most startling events).
He seemed to be frozen in shock instead. The only thing that moved was his jaw dropping slightly, leaving his mouth a bit open. He tasted like the chocolate she'd seen him eat earlier. Despite being able to feel his breath against her, she decided frenching him unexpectedly in front of a large portion of their coworkers might give him an aneurysm.
She pulled away to rest her head on his shoulder instead. She knew she should probably have other feelings but she just felt…comfortable. Content and at peace, even in the middle of an alien world. Surveying the room, nods were now abounding. Surveying the bridge crew, the emotion she registered on most faces best seemed to fit with "smug". She resisted narrowing her eyes at them. She was too cozy now for immediate violence anyway.
"Very well. Please, enjoy the rest of the museum!" The head Bynars waved them out apologetically, shoving some sort of vouchers into their hands. Mariner grabbed them and shepherded Boimler have out into the main galleries. They stayed for the shortest time possible which would not elicit suspicion before rushing back to the shuttle.
Boimler tried to open what he clearly intended to be a heartfelt discussion on the way back to the shuttle. "Mariner, about earlier…."
"What about it?" She didn't really see the need to discuss anything.
"Do you not want to talk about having our first kiss in front of the bridge crew without any notice?"
"Er well…" Mariner guessed he deserved some words at least. "I don't see the need to say anything really? Just felt normal for us I guess."
Boimler then started rambling as they walked. "I mean, yeah, it was great! I was happy to be there. With you. Your lips were warm. In a good way though, I liked it! I'm just worried I guess? Does this change anything? Does it have to? Do-"
"Boims." She cut him off. "Nothing has to change! I'm fine if you're fine. You're still my best friend, and it's staying that way as far as I'm concerned."
He seemed relieved at this. "You're my best friend too. I don't want anything to change that, ever."
Hearing him say that made her heart feel warm and safe.
She revelled in the feeling for a second, then shook it off and slipped a cheeky hand around his waist. "But today I believe I'm your wife."
She punctuated the last word by digging her fingertips into his side, jumping away as he leapt into the air with a little shriek. She then bolted for the shuttle, stumbling a little in the turn. He caught up and tried to do the same thing to her, but she grabbed his wrists and kept them up in the air.
He twisted out of her grip and lunged a second time. She dodged, turned and ran again.
"I want a divorce!" His voice called after her, the playful note in it evident as he tailed her.
"Damn, we'd better have had an amazing wedding ceremony to make up for divorcing me this quickly!" She dived back through the shuttle doors. Boimler poked her in the shoulder gently as he rushed in behind.
"I am a little confused. Do you need me to perform a wedding ceremony for you? Or perhaps annul one?" Ah yes, T'Lyn was here too.
"Did you guys get married or something while you were out there?" Sky seemed a little incredulous.
"Ransom decided we were to get us out of there when things went a little sideways." Mariner then quickly relayed the story to the others. They shuffled uneasily.
"What now?" Sky asked apprehensively.
"Aren't you supposed to know?" Mariner side eyed them, a rough edge in her voice.
"Hey, I'm here to help, not be omniscient!"
"Well th-"
T'Lyn cut off the growing argument. "If they do not know, then this is not productive and will not help Tendi. We need to return to the Cerritos and regroup."
This shocked Mariner out of her little moment. She shouldn't have snapped at Sky - no matter who they were, if they didn't know, they didn't know. If she kept telling herself that she might be able to force down the worry-turned-anger in her looking for a target. Sure, she could mess around with Boimler on the way back to the shuttle, but she didn't know Sky like that. Someone new just rubbed her up the wrong way in a tense situation.
Something similar appeared to be happening with T'Lyn. Her mouth and jaw were tight the whole flight back, shoulders locked in position. Mariner could see her repeatedly flexing and loosening her muscles. Her breathing repeatedly flicked out of rhythm before being forcibly dragged back into place. Mariner assumed this was close to a regulation Vulcan rage spiral. Better not piss her off for the next few hours or she might get forcibly thrown out the airlock.
Boimler seemed to happily tap away on his PADD for the entire ride home - hopefully coming up with a plan, but no one should look that happy about planning. Mariner obviously couldn't see Sky's expression, but they looked out into space while tapping their right foot incessantly. Mariner didn't know what they had to be worried about - Tendi wasn't theirs, everything was going to be fine for them no matter what happened.
(But Mariner knew how letting someone down felt, and it didn't feel good.)
By the time they made it back to sick bay the on-call team was way ahead of them. Mariner studiously avoided looking at Tendi's neck and instead settled onto a chair beside Rutherford.
He pulled up a screen to show the group. "I started working on theories as soon as I heard that what we needed was missing; Ransom told me right after he got off the call he had with you. So I thought to myself, why might someone else want this thing? Rival museum? Too coincidental. Someone else with the same problem? Surely they would have tried Starfleet first, who would have informed us in turn. No, this has to be related to the fact that we wanted it.
So, who knew that we wanted it? Obviously the relevant crewmembers here did, but I very much doubt anyone on the Cerritos would be passing out random information like that. Then there's the communications we sent out to other places - Earth, Vulcan, Orion. An overhead subspace communication seems the most likely option. Who knows why they decided they wanted to fuck with us, but that doesn't really matter.
Which leads us to - who could have heard such a message, and then chosen to act upon it before we even could? Should be simple enough to construct an algorithm which should significantly narrow down the candidates."
Rutherford then fell silent and tapped away at this PADD. Mariner gave it a couple of seconds before saying what the rest of the staring group were thinking. "And the results are…?"
"Processing!"
Of course they were. Mariner was now impatient to kick someone, she just needed some directions to the correct ass.
She heard Boimler's voice speak behind her. "Tendi, how are you feeling? Can I get you anything?"
Of course he remembered. He was always so thoughtful like that. She steeled her nerves as she faced Tendi. The rash had now spread around Tendi's neck such that it was easily visible when facing her. Mariner felt uncomfortable looking at the problem when she couldn't fix it. She looked away and stared hard into the floor as Tendi and Boimler spoke.
Unfortunately for her this meant an undignified startle when Ransom's voice came over the comm. "Bridge to Mariner and team. Please report here immediately; we've found something."