The following days passed in near-complete silence. Punctuated by a squeal or a giggle over some trivial joke. A sigh. Violin notes humming in the backyard. Wordless exclamations from Elsa's bedroom as they gave vent to their passions. All too aware they were being listened to by devices already known to be installed from the day they arrived. Yet now Anna felt shackled by the guilt of their revealed affections. A feeling she couldn't give word to. A taboo, forbidden love that could only be told from linked hands beneath the dining table. A held gaze. The way she kissed like it was the last time, every time.
Beneath the dense canopies of the woodland trails, Anna learned the shape of Elsa's mouth anew in a multitude of ways. The one that said, can they see us from here? A circular one that showed amazement at another flying machine. Lips pursed at bird song twittering in the leaves, before they spread again as she mimicked their melody. And Anna's favourite one of all: the shape that opened against hers as she threw her against a tree. Hurried kisses beneath the cover of lush foliage and scented pine. Silent, guttural moans and greedy hands pawing beneath clothing. Right before they walked back to the house like they hadn't done anything at all.
Anna could tell that Elsa yearned for something beyond this existence. Eyes always lofted to the sky, in search of a memory that floated between the clouds. Nameless spirits that gave speed to the elements. Anna had gone out for groceries one evening and returned to find Elsa curled on the sofa. Having commandeered her magical fruit machine still endlessly playing that drone video of the Fjords. Fallen asleep amidst the sound of crashing waves cranked to an ear-splitting maximum. She looked so precious then, blonde hair splayed over a cushion. White shift dress hitched up. Probably dreaming where her last thoughts left off. That she wanted to see her home again.
She'd confronted her lightly about this the next day over lunch at a cafe.
"It's not about the Fjords, really - this would sound awfully silly but-" Elsa huffed a sigh, toying with her capers over a plate of gravlax, "I'd like to see the sea again. I've grown up next to it for so long that it feels odd to be apart from it-"
"The sea? You know Baltimore is an hour's drive away, right?"
"-and I'd like to experience sitting in one of those flying machines, to soar into the air," Elsa continued, "I don't think your superiors would allow me the chance to, though."
Anna closed her hand upon Elsa's. She'd avoided broaching the subject for so long and wracked her brain day and night. Ignoring all of Hans's texts and follow up questions.
"If I brought you to the sea," Anna said, looking at some far off distance over Elsa's shoulders, not meeting her eyes, "will you show me who you really are?"
A flicker of doubt passed. Elsa's hand twitched. Before the blonde bit her lip and nodded. The unspoken commitment was all it took for Anna to put her request to the NSA.
Subject willing to cooperate with requests to display powers upon authorisation of domestic travel to a seabound location.
At the next check-in, Hans tapped on the single sentence written in her notes. Humming to himself. The nervous energy was - unnerving, to say the least. Before she could snap from his prolonged bout of silence, Hans got up and walked out of the room. Leaving her alone and surrounded with locked filing cabinets. Returning minutes later with tickets to Portland, Maine. And a grim expression on his face that told her this was her last chance.
Before the entire project collapsed on itself and Anna had to write this off as yet another fuck up in her sorry life.
"I didn't expect it'd look like this," Elsa mused, arms linked with Anna's as they passed into Baltimore Airport's departure area. She looked like a fish out of water. Gawking at the travelators. Signs and directions pointing everywhere. How do you even know where you're supposed to go? The only parcel of the process Elsa held familiarity with were the TSA checks, considerably less intrusive than Fort Meade's security. Still, Anna held her breath as Elsa repeatedly triggered the metal detector and had to be patted down. It'd been worth it just to see her face glow in amazement when she approached the enormous floor-to-ceiling departure windows. Boeing 737s lumbering down taxiways and parked alongside skybridges.
"This is what they look like," Elsa whispered. Travel bag clutched to herself. Eyes pried wide open in wonder. Metal Birds. Head tilting aloft as a Spirit Airways jet swooped along the runway and leapt into the sky.
Sitting hand-in-hand, Anna felt the ever-present buzz of anticipation in Elsa's muscles increase steadily as they waited in the departure lounge. None of Anna's reassurances calmed her about that magical doorway that swallowed people up. It's just like embarking a ship, you'll get on a gangway and - well, board. This is no different. Just a couple of hours. In fact, probably less bumpy than sailing on the open seas.
Elsa's face resembled a sheet of paper when she took her first shaky steps into the metal bird and buckled herself down. Anna had given her the window seat so she could see exactly what was going on. She listened to the flight attendant like he was performing her last rites. Hands clamped right around Anna's and the armrest when the bird rumbled off and hurtled itself down the runway. Anna giggled as Elsa let loose an involuntary scream at the lurch. Eyes screwed shut and crushed into the seat. Before Anna could burst out in a glee of laughter, she opened her eyes again and peeked out the window.
We're flying!
"You're literally my ride-or-die lady," Elsa finally found the courage to look away from the window, "for agreeing to do this with me."
"Oh, no, no-" Anna waved her off, "I've flown in this contraption hundreds of times. Even had to jump out of one."
"You what?"
"It was part of soldiering," Anna tried and failed to mimic a parachute opening, "a parachute, like big wings you wore in a backpack and opened up after you hurled yourself out of the metal bird."
"That sounds absolutely frightening, almost like courting death."
"Oh yes, I nearly wet myself from fear," Anna sniggered, "thankfully I only had to do it five times before they called it quits. Oh! At least I got a shiny badge out of it."
Anna pulled her olive green canvas Fjällräven bag from beneath the seat and pointed out the pinned jump wings. Burnished steel gleaming cold in the dim cabin lights. She'd rarely, if ever, worn her service uniform and stuck the badges to her bag after leaving the army. A row of metal decorations that represented the dregs from eight years of service. Quickly, Anna moved to shove her bag back but was stopped by Elsa's firm hand.
"What's this one for?" Elsa pointed at a random badge.
Anna relaxed momentarily, "Good conduct - basically you get it for showing up to work on time and not breaking anything. They almost didn't want to give it to me."
"How about this?"
"I, um," Anna swallowed, watching Elsa's finger resting on her Purple Heart, "got hurt by a bomb. We were searching a block of houses for Separatist Insurgents and I stepped on tripwire."
"Oh, heavens."
"The war was supposed to be over by then. We were effectively, peacekeepers," Anna shook her head, still hearing the raining debris. Screaming men. Silence where there should've been voices. "One guy in my platoon died."
"Who-"
"Russians planted it, yes. They didn't think to remove their traps after pulling out. But the way I see it - I was wearing body armour and spent a few days in hospital. I learned later that the house belonged to a Ukrainian mother with three children. So it would've been her-"
"You are very noble, dear Anna-"
"As I said," Anna covered the rest of her badges, "I was just sweeping up a mess."
Elsa's eyes remained fixed on hers. She didn't need to look down to see where her finger was pointing. All the way to the left of her satchel. The medal accorded the highest order of precedence. Only five awarded to women since WW2. Silver Star. Elsa's silence said more than words - you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to.
She didn't want to.
None of the barriers she'd put up over the years existed anymore in front of Elsa. The woman who'd bared her soul. Made her both the weakest version of herself and the strongest. It was time to let it go.
"During my deployment in Donetsk, I worked extensively with the Civilian population and NATO peacekeeping forces. Food supply. Infrastructure. Civil Services," Anna spread her fingers and stared at them for a good ten seconds, "most of my time, I'd spend listening to women and children. The elderly. Helping them in whatever way I could. A pattern began to emerge during our interviews - which was when I uncovered the first seeds of separatists regrouping in the region. Eventually I gathered enough intelligence and passed it onto the higher command. A month later they stopped all Civil Affairs work in the region. A week after we pulled out, the bombs fell again. Scores of people died."
"-and their deaths weigh on your conscience."
"I keep telling myself that leaving them alone would've started another round of war anyway," Anna leaned closer to Elsa, "that at least the families would've had some semblance of peace before being destroyed. Rather, they were thrust right back into violence before being ready for it."
"You needn't carry this burden alone, Anna," Elsa brushed the girl's red hair, allowing her to lean on her shoulder, "it wasn't your decision to make - whether it was their time to die or not."
"Is that what you told yourself?" Anna whispered, lacing her fingers through Elsa's.
"Well, I don't actually have the luxury of telling myself that, since I did sign the mobilisation that sent all my men to the continent," Elsa answered, "but I did imagine that there was good left in the world. In the smiles of our loved ones and their voices. This holds true for whatever part of the world we're in."
Anna pulled away, just so she could look at the softness in Elsa's eyes. The sincerity that reached into her heart and stitched each broken part anew.
"More than being worth dying for," Elsa continued, brushing the tear off Anna's cheekbone, "they're usually the ones that make living on worth the sacrifice."
After sharing bites of chocolate truffles Anna snuck onto the plane and humming along to Katy Perry on shared earbuds - Elsa's face went ghastly white again at the prospect of landing. Clinging to her seat with shaking fists and enduring the restrained laughter from Anna when they finally careened to a halt.
"So, which was worse? Going up or coming down?"
"I'd say going up," Elsa wiped perspiration from her forehead, "because at least after coming down, it's over and done with."
"Don't say that so soon," Anna chuckled as she retrieved their bags from the bin, "we still have a return flight to Baltimore tomorrow."
Elsa flashed a weak smile, "With you around - I might even muster the courage to jump out one of these metal birds."
"Hah!" Anna laughed, "No badges for trying."
They found an Uber outside the terminal - still another one of the marvels Elsa couldn't quite wrap her head around. That the supposed privilege of summoning a magical cart was available to anyone with one of those phones in their hands. Nor was the fact that Anna had conveniently forgotten to confirm their reservation at the NSA designated motel near the beach, and it was a simple matter of tapping away at her email to do it. Maine was still chilly - but it didn't stop Anna from making a detour to treat themselves to lobster rolls. A delicacy even to an aristocrat like Elsa - now a frivolous indulgence for the masses for the exorbitant price of thirty American dollars.
Anna splashed a ridiculous pad of butter onto her roll. Throwing her head back as she ingested an all-too-large mouthful of the sandwich. Her eyes opened yet again to Elsa's narrowed ones. Half-eaten roll dangling between her fingers.
"Do I have lobster on my face?" Anna mumbled with her mouth full.
Elsa's eyes darted left and right, "Those guys seem awfully interested in you."
Her voice came across as a whisper. Anna froze for a moment, chewing slowly in time with the tilt of her head. A reflection in the windowpane. Two men in black polo t-shirts seated amongst the sparse lunch crowd. Light Beach Boys music played in the Cafe's frigid cold interiors but all she heard was her rapidly accelerating heartbeat.
"You sure?" Anna whispered back.
"I-I don't want to be paranoid, but, but," Elsa whispered back, "I'm sure."
Her next words sent Anna's heart plummeting into despair.
"He has a gun behind his jacket. I saw it while sitting down."
Anna whipped out her phone, immediately sending a text to Hans.
Anna (12:45pm): Whatever the fuck you think you're doing - don't do it. And tell your goons to get lost.
Hans-AHOLE (12:45pm): wat r u talkin about. Im in montana.
Anna (12:46pm): go to hell
Hans-AHOLE (12:46pm): give us what we want and we wont bother u
"Who are you writing to?" Elsa asked in a low voice.
"Hans. He says they're not his guys, but-"
"-I don't believe him."
"Neither do I."
Anna took another bite. It took a couple of tries to swallow the entire chunk of lobster and she'd suddenly lost all her appetite despite skipping breakfast. Elsa's face had turned pale.
"Are you scared?" Anna asked. Elsa nodded in response.
"So am I."
"What're we going to do?"
"We're going to do what we came here to do. See the sea," Anna whispered, casting one more glance at the reflections and feeling her skin prickle when the men had disappeared, "but first, we're getting the hell out of here."
Trays abandoned, Anna slowed her footsteps as she stepped into the brisk, Maine weather. Sunlight blinded her momentarily. Eyes adjusting to the blurry sway of Poplar trees. Google maps had indicated only a mile walk from the motel to the beach. It'd be over soon. Elsa could see the sea and they could get back to their idyllic life. Powers or no powers. She grabbed Elsa's hand and pointed to the sidewalk by some suburban houses that'd take them there. Just round the bend and down some stone steps.
A shudder coursed through Elsa's hand as she turned back. Anna didn't. Traffic was sparse in this neighbourhood, so the sight of a blacked-out Chevy Tahoe driving past them immediately raised her eyebrows. Anna turned around and immediately started walking in the other direction. Only to spot the two men from earlier trotting from the carpark. They waved at her, "Hey! Miss! Do you mind-"
"Run-" Anna seethed at Elsa. Her hands went ice cold, but still she maintained her grasp.
Her heart hammered wildly against her throat as they broke into a mad sprint across the street. Eyes lifted to the cloudy sky counted no less than seven drones buzzing about. Operators watching their every move.
"We need to get into cover," Anna explained, pointing at the forest, "they can't see us there."
"What, are we being chased?" Elsa asked between heaving breaths, "Why would they do this?"
"Not sticking around to find out."
She took one more look behind to see the men catching up. Before bracing herself for another jog across the empty street. Round a bend lined with bushes and trees which obscured her vision. The Converse sneakers she wore held up well enough, but Elsa's snow boots proved cumbersome and slow. Too slow to warn Anna from running straight into the line of fire of several SWAT officers. Already covered behind the SUV's doors and windows. Guns pointed directly at her.
And Elsa.
The scream left her lungs in one shrill gasp, "No!"
They opened fire.
Ear-splitting hail of bullets. Anna fell backwards to the ground, hitting the ice hard in a huge oomph. It'd completely frozen over. Icicles biting into her flesh as a violent wind swept past her face. Through the sleet and fog Elsa emerged, virulent frost curdling from both hands. The sight stole her breath, but still she gasped, "Get down, you idiot."
Elsa's eyes glowed with white, foggy light. A violent blizzard erupted when she lifted her hands. Anna looked up at the impossible sight of the car tipping over. What?
She felt nothing but warmth when the woman bent and pulled her to her feet.
"What?" Anna yelled, pulling her coat over herself, "What was that?"
"Into the forest as you said," Elsa hushed, "there may be more of them."
She yanked her away from the road towards a suburban residential area with criss-crossing streets. If she'd thought Maine was freezing, this was being on another planet altogether. All the cloudy adrenaline hadn't alleviated the violent shaking in her hands. Or the utter pain that sliced through her cheeks from the cold. She'd seen the snowflakes. Driven into a bank of snow. Studied poems and read all the rumours. But experiencing the terrifying reality of what Elsa was capable of, represented an entirely different world.
It crippled Anna. Left her staggering in Elsa's grasp even as they stumbled their way past cafes and townhouses. Mysteriously vacant for a weekday afternoon. Fog and sleet rolled in from every direction. Beyond the shroud, red and blue blinking lights. In the haze of her own adrenaline Anna scarcely comprehended where to go next. Who would do this to them? Why would they do this? Only that she had to protect the woman beside her. Afflicted with the same heaving breaths as herself.
They'd barely stumbled two blocks before walking into a roadblock. Barricades and masked men behind Humvees.
Guns pointed at her.
An almighty crack blasted through Anna's ears and the ground gave way beneath her feet. Ribs burned with pain. She sat up long enough to see a chasm of ice ripping into the roadblock. Smouldering vehicles in craggy, icy ruin. Bodies lying in ghastly white funeral mounds. She clambered away on her hands, icicles cutting into them. Her hearing shot out from the roaring wind, louder than a jet engine. Elsa pulled her gently upon her shoulder.
"The other way," Anna slurred. Blood pumping through her veins as she forced the fog of adrenaline apart.
Somewhere in the distance, sirens wailed above the billowing wind. With Anna pointing vague directions with a shaking finger through the fog. And Elsa helping her stumble and trip her way upon the frozen pavements. They found their way to the edge of the beach. A flight of stone steps gave way to soft sand.
Figures emerged through the mist. Mere dark shadows. Elsa didn't wait. The ice-tipped lance from Hansen's poem glinted in Anna's widened eyes long enough to go flying into a living man. Through what must've been layers of Kevlar and iron plates. Elsa raised a finger and shot flaring bolts of ice into another soldier. Then another. Picking them off with the ease of a woman she'd seen strolling through a florist and choosing flowers. Lightened gait barely left footsteps in the sand. Anna staggered behind her, shuddering in terror at the frozen corpse lying contorted and lifeless. Frostbite had reclaimed part of his skull.
"Elsa!" Anna called out. Lurching towards her shadow. The Queen raised a hand and sliced a chilly wind through the mist. A gale that parted fog and snow alike. She saw her clearly now, trotting towards the waves like she was drawn by an unseen call from over the tides. Instead, Elsa stood on tiptoes and cried out into the Ocean's depths. Her voice rang across the waves. Tearing its gentle whisper asunder until there was nothing in the fabric of its calm but Elsa's voice. A Danish song from ancient times. For ancient beings that persisted through the centuries. Like herself.
Vandets ånd, lyt til mit kald!
Lyt, opfyld den ed, du svor
Din elskerinde, på randen af fald
Del oceanerne med dit brøl!
(Spirit of the waters, heed my call!
Hearken, fulfil the oath you swore
Thy mistress, brink of her fall
Part the oceans with your roar!)
Elsa turned to face her. Eyes glimmering with frozen tears and snowflakes sublimating from the bloom of her white dress. This parting moment had haunted her dreams. She'd seen it any number of ways. At a train station. At an airport. In the NSA Elevator. Tearful embraces and promises neither could keep. Not like this. On a frozen beach strewn with corpses and icicles. Helicopter blades still pummelled the air behind them.
"Y-you're going," Anna whispered, a mere raindrop in a thunderstorm, "aren't you?"
"I've sent doves to scout the area. And I've summoned a wall to cordon the beach," Elsa answered, "they won't harm you once I leave."
Leave.
"Elsa-"
"I-I- promised I'd be honest with you," Elsa whispered, reaching behind her neck. A grimace. Anna stepped forward, hand-over-mouth. Too late to stop blood streaking down her collarbone. A pink ice blade extended from Elsa's fingertips. Within it, a macabre lump of skin and silicon she cast away into the sand. "Here I am now, honest. I won't allow my continued presence in your life to harm you. This is the only promise I'm sure I'll be able to keep. And know this because-"
"-I love you," Anna answered, her heart clenching so hard it might burst.
Elsa looked away into the sand. Her face broke. "You read my mind."
Stormclouds rolled in over the horizon. The tide rose. With it, the well of tears in Anna's eyes streamed forth as Elsa sobbed uncontrollably into her hands. She wanted so badly to hurl herself into Elsa's arms. Pretend it was just a nightmare. Waking in her arms and living an ignorant life again. The thought of picnicking with her by the Fjords tore a new gaping wound in her heart. Another memory that could never be fulfilled.
"Goodbye, Anna," Elsa whispered, between sobs, "I will miss our - morning walks together."
"Elsa, please. Don't go-" Anna pleaded one more time. Helpless to stop the sudden swell of seawater emerging behind Elsa. The Queen barely stirred as the shape of a horse took form. Swirling head to hooves with crystalline water. Darkened eyes that flashed like lightning. Elsa merely took two steps backwards and hurled herself upon his back. Before it took off into the Atlantic ocean. Thunder cracked upon its hooves and all of three seconds passed before the rider and horse vanished into the clouds.
Anna's left slumped upon the beach. Surrounded by icicles. A bloodied tracker chip. Frozen footprints of the woman she loved.
Remnants of her broken heart strewn in the sand.