Hello, everyone. Sorry for the long wait, as always. Lots of bad things happened to me from late September to now, so I didn't have a lot of time to write. Hurricane, business trips, relatives dying, tires exploding, cats getting lost... it's been, arguably, the worst year for me in a long time. I won't go into detail, just know that there is an assortment of reasons why this chapter has been a long time coming, even though it's a short one. I've really only just recently gotten a break from everything, and even that is relative. I'm trying to get back into the swing of things, hopefully sticking to shorter chapters for regular updates, but life is still topsy-turvy right now, so we'll see how that goes.
Anyway, a short aside about Kori: I know lots of people are disgruntled with the fact that she's gotten a lot of focus in these past chapters. She's not going anywhere, but that focus is going to lessen. The main point of her existence was to provide a platform for the story to explore certain things, like justifying the war, colonial involvement, conflict between colonizers and native Earth Kingdom residents, etc. These are things that she was a perfect vehicle for. This story is going to have other characters besides Xisheng and the girls. They will often receive limited stints of focus when the story needs to discuss elements that the main characters aren't suited for. These side characters provide depth to the world and the society within it: if we limit ourselves to just the perspectives and experiences of the main cast, a lot of great content goes to waste.
I know that stinks when you're eager for action or romance, but those two things are only 2/3rds of the story. From the very beginning, this fic has dominantly featured a deep dive into the world's cultures and politics, so don't expect that to ever disappear entirely.
"I'm afraid that's all I can do. If I'd been able to treat the wound when it was fresh, there may have been no scar, but as it stands…"
Kori, her face free of bandages for the first time since being initially treated, reached up to touch the spot of her injury from the battle at the wall as she sat on a crate across from a Waterbender in the early hours of the dawn. She could feel two lines of calloused flesh starting at her forehead and stretching down across her right eye: the scars that her healer, Yuma, was talking about.
"Don't worry about it. I'm grateful for your help. It's more than enough to know that a bit of superficial damage is all I'll keep from such an injury."
The dark-skinned girl across from Kori smiled sweetly. "Yes, that is fortunate. I only hope I can do as much for everyone else here."
Glancing into the open canvas flap of the white medical tent of the base, Kori spied dozens of injured soldiers and colonials being treated by both regular Fire Nation medics and other Waterbending healers. Many of them were in far worse shape than Kori had been, and they were numerous. That was why she was outside of the tent instead of within it: not enough space.
Though it was a grim picture, as best as Kori could tell, the process of treating the wounded was going very well now that these healers from the Water Tribe had showed up. Within a single day of their arrival, they had expedited the healing of dozens of wounded. Sure, it wasn't like they were magically bringing every injured person back to full health, but things were much better than they would have been otherwise. Kori couldn't help but wonder how anyone could remain injured for long in the Water Tribes proper: if just a few healers could tend to an army like this, what was it like to live in a nation where they numbered in the hundreds or thousands?
The brunette Earthbender had half a mind to ask Yuma about it, but she noticed someone approaching her with purpose from the corner of her eye before she could, and focused her attention on that instead.
Coming her way was Xisheng, fully armored and cape-clad, with two Firebending soldiers in step at either flank. That alone wasn't terribly unusual, but the extremely dire expression on his face was. He generally looked serious, but the young man's current visage was more akin to displeasure or anger. Not directed at Kori, hopefully...
Kori would have rose to her feet and saluted, but Xisheng was moving briskly, and walking past her without pause in but a moment. However, he did direct his gaze and his voice at her in that moment.
"Come with me."
Xisheng's curt and clearly agitated tone left Kori with no room for disagreement, not that she would have even dreamed of expressing that. This might have been the only time Xisheng had ever sounded so forceful while issuing a command, at least to her.
Since he didn't break his stride, Kori had to awkwardly scramble after Xisheng to catch up to him. Ordinarily, the brunette might have come abreast of him while walking, but today, she felt it more appropriate to fall in step behind him instead. It was difficult to fully explain why, but this was the first time Kori had ever felt genuinely cowed by Xisheng's presence. Right this moment, she didn't see much of that man who had been willing to listen to a grunt's problems.
"W-what can I do for you, Commander?"
Xisheng didn't even look over his shoulder as he answered. "I need an Earthbending bodyguard I can trust. That's you until you're out of this army or I find someone better."
Though his presentation was overbearing, Kori wasn't surprised by this revelation. Naturally, almost everyone in camp had at least heard something about the attempt on Xisheng's life yesterday. Kori didn't know too much about it, but she'd heard that hostile Earthbenders were involved, and that it had been a close call.
That said, she had nothing to say other than an acknowledgment, though she couldn't keep herself from sounding nervous. This felt like even more pressure than being part of the sapper team for the assault on the wall.
"Y-yes, Commander. I'll do my best!"
To this, Xisheng said nothing. Some small part of him was mindful of the fact that his behavior was a bit harsh, but he couldn't find it in him to care at this moment. For such reasons, he and his entourage moved in silence as he headed for the command post, where he knew many important individuals awaited him.
At the rapid pace they were moving, it didn't take long to come upon the square metal building in question. It was just the same as it had been yesterday, save for the fact that it was surrounded by far more security than before. At least a dozen Firebenders stood watch at and around the sole entrance, with each and every one of them keenly observant of their surroundings.
After yesterday's appalling breach of security, there was no excuse for slacking off, and there wasn't a soul in the regular army that would dare be caught failing their duties as guardsmen: not with a commander, a renowned general, and the Princess of the nation present at the base.
The guards that Xisheng got close enough to saluted him, while those further out kept their eyes peeled for problems. As he drew closer to the door, Xisheng briefly spoke to his own escorts.
"Stay here."
Though she was a bit uncomfortable with the sudden requirement to stand around with a bunch of stoic, masked sentries, Kori did as she was told all the same as Xisheng's other escorts. It wasn't like she would have been capable of much if a fight broke out inside of the command post anyway. She could do nothing but watch as Xisheng entered the building alone.
The inside of the metal structure was likewise host to beefed up security. Throughout the halls, there was a soldier standing watch at the same intervals as the lights on the walls. Since Xisheng was alone this time, each guard saluted him properly as the young commander passed. He offered no reaction to their deference.
At his pace, it didn't take long for Xisheng to reach the door he was looking for, which was flanked by two more guards. Since he couldn't be mistaken for anyone else, the duo let him in without delay, allowing Xisheng entry into the war room.
Like most days, the place was crowded, though this time with many familiar faces. Arrayed around the map table in the center of the room were Xisheng's usual advisors, Muzai, Shairo, and Aranai, but also General Lu Bei and Azula. Everyone bore grim expressions even as they faced the newest arrival.
Xisheng's subordinate officers saluted him. Azula naturally didn't, while Lu Bei offered the slightest bow of acknowledgement. The white-haired general was also the first to speak.
"Welcome, Commander. I'm pleased to see you unharmed after yesterday's catastrophe."
Though it was no fault of Lu Bei's own, Xisheng wasn't feeling particularly amicable towards the man at the moment, so he only offered a slight nod in response before turning his attention to Major Shairo.
"How are things proceeding, Major?"
Even the usually stalwart Shairo seemed a little put off by Xisheng's demeanor. The young commander had always been serious when it came to matters of importance, but he'd never been so grim and curt. It was an odd look for him. Still, he gave his report unfettered.
"We're still questioning a number of colonials. We've turned up a few suspicious individuals, but without resorting to more forceful interrogation methods, we can't get the truth out of any of them. It's difficult to tell if they had a hand in the assassination attempt. Are you still adamant that we avoid torture?"
Despite his mood, Xisheng still managed to give a detailed answer on his stance there. "The last thing we need to do right after achieving victory with the help of the colonials is torture them. It's already bad enough that we have to mistrust them after the role they played in taking down the wall. This kind of debacle is dampening morale enough as it is. Besides, torture doesn't guarantee the truth from the victim. It just guarantees an answer."
Unable to find any fault in his logic, Shairo said nothing further on the matter, resigned to continue his job of securing the base and their forces within the limitations that had been set for him. By now, he was mostly trusting of Xisheng's judgments: the Commander was many years his junior, but Shairo was not blind to his merits. Xisheng had his respect, considering what he had accomplished since taking command.
Across from Shairo's position at the table, Lu Bei stroked his long beard. "Though prudence is warranted regardless, I do not believe you will find traitors responsible for this assassination attempt within the ranks of your Earthbenders. It is more likely that your assailants were the Dai Lee, elite agents of Ba Sing Se."
Azula, perhaps feeling that she wasn't contributing enough to the conversation, asked for clarification. "And how do you know this? What exactly defines an 'elite agent' for our enemies?"
Since nobody else was any wiser, they all focused on Lu Bei, eagerly awaiting his explanation. The old man didn't seem troubled by the attention.
"Ba Sing Se is a difficult city to infiltrate, but it's far from impregnable. Some of our own spies have managed to gather intel over the years, at least back when the Earth Kingdom's security and paranoia wasn't so pervasive. The Dai Lee are a police force of sorts, though their interest is not common law and order. They root out spies and traitors, and enforce bans on topics deemed seditious. They are also skilled Earthbenders with special techniques often involving the use of segmented stone gloves, such as the ones used in the attack yesterday. I will not pretend to know everything about them, but it's safe to say that they tend to nefarious clandestine affairs in Ba Sing Se."
Aranai, his topknot noticeably a little more unkempt than usual, adjusted the glasses on his face. "The enemy acted more quickly than I expected them to. Throughout this war, the Earth Kingdom has rarely been known to act so aggressively, or decisively at that. We overestimated their unwillingness to break from defensive strategies."
Xisheng glanced down at the map of Ba Sing Se on the table in front of him, noting the large black circle that denoted the Fire Nation base within the confines of the outermost wall.
"They've never been pushed like this. For a hundred years, their city has been impregnable. Even when Iroh broke through, it was a small breach that went nowhere, an incident easily swept under the rug and written off as a fluke. Even when that breach occurred, Fire Nation troops never actually made it into Ba Sing Se in force."
The young commander planted his index finger on the black circle denoting their base. "We are now inside their walls. Not a spy, not a scout, not a vanguard: an entire army, with an established foothold and the means to continue advancing. The entirety of their farmland lies before us. Their formerly invincible wall was obliterated in an instant, and all they have to protect the other rings are walls of no sterner stuff. If there's a single tactician on their side with the slightest competence, they know they can't afford to let us muster strength. Their defensive strategy has already failed them once. I wouldn't be surprised if they intended to commit to a pitched battle soon."
To Xisheng's side, Lu Bei likewise surveyed the map. "Indeed… if it comes to an all-out offensive from the armies of Ba Sing Se, we're unlikely to have the forces necessary to hold our position. They can concentrate everything they have on this force. Even when the bulk of my own forces arrive to reinforce us, defeat would be likely in such a direct confrontation."
A cross look on her face, Azula spoke up again. "So what do we do? We can't afford to be beaten back after all we have accomplished."
Everyone was silent for a few moments, pondering the options that were before them. After some time, Lu Bei spoke his mind once again.
"It seems to me, friends, that our solution is simple: we cannot allow our victory or defeat to hinge on the survival of one position, or one army that holds it."
Azula raised an eyebrow. "Be less cryptic, would you?"
Xisheng, grasping Lu Bei's meaning, answered in his stead. "We should spread our forces, so that the enemy cannot focus all of their power on a singular point. We need to dictate when and how we fight the enemy, instead of waiting for them to come to us. Though it means spreading out our forces, it'll give us better odds of maintaining pressure here in enemy territory. Since we can't take a win in a direct fight between our two armies at full strength, we can choose our battles by ensuring that no singular defeat is enough to push us out of the city."
Azula didn't look entirely convinced of this strategy, but before she could say anything about it, Major Shairo spoke up. "While I understand the rationale, will we have anything other than defeats if we spread our forces too thin? If we don't have the strength to face the enemy as a whole, I hardly see how we can stand against them while divided, even if they must split up in order to face us on all fronts."
"We don't have to win at that point. If we can force the enemy to face us in smaller engagements, then it's not a problem for us to retreat in most cases. If our forces spread and advance, then a single section being forced to retreat back to this base doesn't spell disaster. It also gives us more strategic opportunities. If all of our troops are in one location, our options for responding to the changing situation is more limited."
This time, Aranai made his voice heard. "Even so, we have to do more than just avoid being pushed out. This strategy may delay us being forced out of Ba Sing Se, but if we don't find a way to turn things in our favor quickly, the end result is still defeat. We just don't have enough troops to win an extended war of attrition right now, whether it is in offense or defense. We have to shift the status quo to ensure an upper hand."
The war room fell silent as the individuals within contemplated Aranai's words. Unfortunately, Xisheng couldn't find any mistake in the man's assessment. They would lose more quickly if their troops were all clumped up, but they would lose anyway, albeit a bit slower, if they spread their forces. Ba Sing Se had the numbers advantage, and could pile in on the FN's forces from almost all directions. Unless Xisheng could think of a way to tip the scales, a defeat was ultimately inevitable. The question was, what advantage did he have...?
"To shift the status quo in our favor... we mustn't wait for the enemy to act. If we wait and react to what they do, we limit out options and give them the initiative. Instead, we have to seize that initiative for ourselves, force the enemy to react to what we do, not the other way around. Our advantage is the fact that they have more important things to protect than we do. If we start razing their farmland, they'll have to move to protect it. That would give us more room to maneuver and seize opportunities."
Major Shairo leaned on the war room table, a confused expression on his face. "Commander, weren't you the one who said we couldn't possibly destroy enough farmland for it to matter before the Comet arrived?"
"Yes, but our enemies aren't going to follow that logic. Do you think the Earth Kingdom is actually planning on being defeated when Sozin's Comet arrives? Even if they don't have a solid plan as to how right now, their intent is definitely to survive and continue fighting on after that day. They have no choice but to think long-term: victory for them isn't just a matter of repelling our incursion, but surviving the next attack, and the next, and even the next after that. If we start destroying their crops now, that hurts their chances of surviving in the future, a future they certainly plan to still be standing in. This is the advantage we hold in this situation. We can force them to divert troops and resources to fronts that we don't truly care about, because they have no choice but to react to those diversions. We can use the weakness that creates to push towards our actual objective: breaching the next wall."
The other people in the room glanced at each other, though Azula focused her gaze on Xisheng. "That... sounds viable enough in theory, but how do we actually seize this opportunity that you're talking about? This strategy might create an opening, but how do we actually take advantage in practice?"
Lu Bei stroked the tips of his mustache as he stared down at the battle map showcasing Ba Sing Se and its territory. "Commander Xisheng's hunch is impossible to confirm preemptively, but it is very likely. If the Earth Kingdom desires to survive beyond this incursion, they must respond to our attacks on their farmland, or they will find themselves in a dire state in any potential future engagement. We could theoretically send a small number of Firebenders to attack farmland, but then our foe will only have to send a small force of their own to intercept them. But if we send a great number, Ba Sing Se will have to divert large troop contingents of their own to answer our diversions. Valuable troops that will be drawn away from the second wall. If we can strike quickly enough during that time, that is our opportunity. It must be swift. A gradual march towards the second wall will tip our hand, and our foe will have enough time to reposition for defense."
Being the one most familiar with the state of their troops, Major Shairo spoke up again. "Is that even feasible? If we have to send a large force to serve as a diversion, we certainly won't have enough troops left to take the second wall. Not to mention that the second wall is not exactly a near destination. Even at our swiftest speed, the enemy will have time to react to our obvious offensive."
There was a moment of silence as Xisheng glanced over at the General, who was likewise looking his way. Though they didn't speak to one another, Xisheng was fairly certain he knew what was on the old man's mind.
"Unless... we do a lightning drive."
Azula raised a questioning brow. "What on earth is that supposed to be?"
"A few years ago, the Fire Nation was moving on the Earth Kingdom city of Chenbao. The enemy had a small defensive garrison, but the Fire Nation assault force was small too. If the enemy had time to fortify in any way, there'd be no chance of winning. So the commander of the Fire Nation troops sent an infantry force along an obvious route towards a tributary town, and scouts from Chenbao noticed. The Earth Kingdom garrison moved a large number of troops to intercept them. But the Fire Nation commander had only sent foot soldiers on the diversionary attack. He kept all of his vehicles, and once he got word that the majority of the enemy garrison was away from Chenbao, he drove his purely vehicular force toward the city at their top speed and with as few breaks as possible. By the time anyone from the Earth Kingdom garrison got wind of this vehicular assault, they had no chance of getting back to the city before the Fire Nation took control of it. That specific strategy has since been dubbed a lightning drive."
Despite Xisheng's explanation, most of his advisors didn't seem particularly reassured. That naturally included Shairo. "Do we have enough vehicles for that to be feasible? Our armored force is sizable, but I don't know if it's enough to breach the next wall on its own, especially if we cannot rely on the tactic we used for the first wall. The enemy will not fall for that again."
Since he had the knowledge required to answer this question, Lu Bei did so in Xishen'g stead. "The forces I arrived here with were only a small fraction of my full command. The rest of my soldiers should be arriving at this camp soon, and when they do, the troops at our disposal will increase significantly. This will include many more vehicles, including both troop transports and tanks. We will have enough vehicles to move a sizable assault force towards our objective at great speed, though whether or not we will be able to get through the second wall without the strategy you used before remains unclear."
Azula leaned away from the table as she folded her arms. "Well, I suppose we've never had this many Earthbenders at our disposal while launching a direct attack before. If we really do catch the enemy off-guard at the second wall, perhaps that will be enough?"
Having reached some sort of consensus on a plan, at least judging by the fact that no one was challenging it, Xisheng took over the conversation again, primarily so he could bring it to a close.
"Regardless, this is the best strategy we have right now. We can work out the specifics as we gather more information on our assets. Until Lu Bei's full force arrives, our goal is clear: fortify this position, scout the surrounding area, and prepare everyone for the next attack as best we can. Is there anything else we need to discuss at this time?"
Everyone in the war room remained silent, providing Xisheng with the answer he needed. "Very well. My subordinates are dismissed. I'll be attending to other matters in the meantime."
The people who were supposed to bow to him did. Azula clearly did not, though she did follow Xisheng out of the war room when he took his leave. Even though they ended up walking right alongside each other in the hall, they did not say anything, perhaps to avoid rousing any suspicions from the guards that kept that walkway under surveillance.
They had not said a word to each other by the time the duo made it outside, and they soon found themselves in the presence of more people: the personal guards Xisheng had taken on, Kori included, and two newcomers, those being Mai and Ty Lee. Notably, Xisheng's friends were being physically blocked from approaching him by some of his Firebending guards. As she was standing a little closer to the door of the command post, Kori approached Xisheng personally to fill him in.
"I'm sorry, Commander, I tried to tell them that these were your friends, but..."
Xisheng waved off her apology as he approached the minor squabble, though it was mostly just his friends standing irately before two of his guards. Presumably, they'd already reached an impasse in their conversation. Approaching from behind, Xisheng announced his presence with a question.
"What's the issue here?"
Mai, arms folded and scowl on her face, peered around the two guards blocking her path to speak before they could. "Apparently, they think we're going to assassinate you or something. My dullest knife is still sharper than these two..."
Being moderately more professional, the two guards did not react to this provocation. They did, however, turn to face Xisheng and get his input on the situation, which he revealed posthaste.
"These women have my trust. Leave them be. In fact, I want you and other guards to move far enough away that I can hold a conversation here without you overhearing it. Stay close enough to keep an eye on me, just don't eavesdrop. Understood?"
The two masked soldiers bowed and saluted before moving off to share Xisheng's orders with the rest of their group. As for Xisheng, he actually waited to make sure they were out of earshot before he bothered saying anything else.
"You know, it's not like the two of you would have been allowed in the command post anyway, increased security or not."
Mai's scowl lessened now that the people causing her irritation were absent, but it didn't go completely. "We weren't even trying to to go inside the building. Just wanted to wait out here for the two of you. Apparently even that was too suspicious to them. You'd think they'd have seen us talking to both of you before now."
"It's a large camp, and most people have better things to do than stare at us throughout the day, if they're even around to do it."
Azula chimed in from the side. "Plus, it hasn't even been a full day since..."
The Crown Princess fell silent even as she glanced over at Xisheng, whose expression had grown grim. It was no mystery to anyone as to why. Ty Lee, ever the one to try and promote general happiness among her friends, tried to do something about this, even if it was just redirecting the conversation. Unfortunately for her, her voice came out as more of a croak than usual.
"Still, they could have..."
The brunette petered off as she tried to cough a bit more normalcy into her voice. Right now, she sounded pretty hoarse, which earned her a curious look from Azula. Mai wasn't surprised, since she had obviously spoken to Ty Lee today already, and Xisheng, well... he didn't need to be curious, since he was pretty sure what the problem was. Either way, Ty Lee smiled apologetically, hoping that her blush could be excused by perceived sickness from her friends.
"Sorry, throat's kinda sore today. I think the air last night was dry."
Azula didn't question that excuse, so apparently, it served well enough. Admittedly though, Ty Lee found it a little odd that Xisheng was so stone-faced at this moment. It was the first time they were seeing each other again after last night, where'd she done some very intimate things with him, including something that had gotten her throat like this in the first place. Donning a stony expression wasn't the way Xisheng usually reacted to embarrassment. It really seemed like he wasn't bothered at all right now. Ty Lee had, admittedly, stated that last night's escapade had just been an act of comfort and solace on her part, but she had still expected him to be a little more affected by it.
At any rate, Mai picked up the conversation instead, since Ty Lee was having trouble. "So, what's the plan now? I assume we're not camping right here at the outer wall forever."
Though this question was directed at Xisheng, he did not answer right away. This silence perplexed the girls around him, particularly Azula, who had just been in the war meeting with him earlier. Though their situation wasn't great, she didn't think it so dire that he'd be this troubled. Especially considering the deepening frown and furrowed brow that was growing more prominent by the second.
Oddly enough, the young commander straightened out his face after taking a deep breath, though it seemed more like a conscious act of will than real emotional relief. What he said next only reinforced that notion.
"I want all of you to go home."
Stunned silence befell the assembled companions as everyone took in Xisheng's unflinching, serious expression. He wasn't looking directly at any one of them, instead looking to some far off point no one else could see. Perhaps he was just bracing for the inevitable. Azula was the first to question his sudden declaration.
"And where exactly do you consider that to be?"
"Omashu, the homeland, the circus: frankly, it doesn't even have to be wherever you consider home. I just don't want any of you here."
His sullen tone made that statement come out harshly. Honestly, Xisheng seemed almost too tired to bother cushioning the impact of his words as he normally would. Mai, at least, understood the true intent behind his sentiment, though she was still going to force him to say it aloud. He had no right to make such an outrageous demand if he unwilling to vocalize his reasons.
"Why-"
"You know why."
There was no immediate rebuttal from any of the girls, as they did indeed know why Xisheng was asking this of them now. Still, this was sudden. They certainly hadn't expected something like this out of the blue, as the first thing he had to say when they were all gathered together for the day. As for how everyone reacted to it, Azula settled on irritation.
"I will not have this discussion again. I've made it perfectly clear already that I will not be sheltered and coddled! Besides, why settle on this notion so strongly now? Plenty of people died attacking the wall just a short time ago. Nothing has changed since then."
Xisheng gritted his teeth as his gaze fell to the ground. "I can't protect you here."
"We don't need protection-"
Suddenly, Xisheng whirled on Azula with a barely contained fervor, his eyes wide even as he shouted at the princess of his whole country. "Yes, you do! We all do! No one here is safe! This isn't me trying to exercise some code of chivalry! No one's safety can be guaranteed here and I need you three to be somewhere else!"
This time, Mai tried to talk him down, and in a surprisingly calm manner. "Gohan, it's not like this is any different from those times we were chasing the Avatar. You couldn't guarantee anyone's safety then either, no matter how hard you tried. Nothing's changed."
Maybe Mai's soothing demeanor actually helped, as Xisheng did manage to lower his voice after a frustrated sigh, though he disagreed with her as he rubbed his forehead. "It's not the same at all. Back then, you were the only people I had to look after, and we were always together. Only a handful of people were trying to hurt you, and we dictated the terms of practically every fight, so I could always be ready. War isn't like that, especially not when I'm in command! Our enemies number in the tens of thousands! They have the initiative to strike at any time, and we spend most of our days separated! Even worse, I'm a prime target, so being near me only puts all of you in even more danger, not less! This situation is nothing like before."
Admittedly, no one could argue with that. Even though their previous foe had been the Avatar, the current situation was indeed several magnitudes more dangerous, at least in theory. Practically speaking, every point Xisheng was making was true. But Ty Lee would be damned before letting practicality or a sore throat get in the way of arguing otherwise.
"It's only natural to worry, but we can stay in the camp whenever there's a big fight, like Mai and I did during the attack on the wall."
The look on Xisheng's face came within a hair's breadth of condescending as he rebutted that notion. The sarcastic tone of his voice, on the other hand, couldn't be mistaken. "Ah, yes, the camp. So very safe, as proven by yesterday's debacle. This place could come under attack at any time with no warning! Covert infiltrators, tunneling Earthbenders, hell, we could just get showered by a huge barrage of boulders, flattening half the camp before we even know what's happening! The rear line of a war zone is still a fucking war zone!"
Taken aback by the sudden venom, Ty Lee couldn't say anything to defend her point. This might have been the first time Xisheng had every spoken to her like she was stupid, and that was beyond hurtful. The only reason she wasn't in tears was because she knew it was his frustration talking, not his usual self. At least, that was what she told herself in this moment.
Even Mai was stunned seeing Gohan lose his temper like this. This was not a man who let his emotions control his words very often, and almost never to an extent where he'd say something hurtful to someone he cared about. As for Azula, she was only growing more irate, though surprisingly, her angrily furrowed brow was actually accompanied by a smirk. It'd been a long time since Mai had seen that expression: so pissed off that Azula almost went full circle to being calm. Mai also found that she couldn't think of any good memories to associate with that expression.
Azula was not content to let her thoughts remain hidden. Whatever she found morbidly amusing, she felt the need to share. "Oh, come off it. You claim that things are different now, but how are they really? You claim you can't protect us now, but it's hardly like you succeeded in that before. Even when there were less enemies, even when we were all together and you had no one to worry about but us, Ty Lee was still nearly cleaved in two. Or did you forget about that one because we ultimately got lucky?"
Mai raised a hand in a placating gesture, trying to curtail Azula's speech before she went any further. She wasn't exactly sure how to rationalize Gohan's concern away, but this definitely seemed like a terrible direction to take.
"Azula, that's not-"
Unfortunately, the Crown Princess paid her no heed at all. Right now, she was entirely focused on Xisheng, staring him down haughtily. "Forget that incident, even. Just consider how many times you were incapable of helping. Too tied up with your own opponent to help one of us, or having to be protected by one of us instead. How about the times when you were too slow to cover someone, and we girls just had to protect each other? You act as if you've been some perfect guardian up until now, that it's only now that you're unable to protect us, but you've fallen short plenty of times before."
Azula took one step forward, then jabbed her finger into Xisheng's chest. "I know why you really believe it's different. Because before now, all of those times when you weren't good enough, you told yourself that you could be better. That if you could just get faster or stronger, there wouldn't be a next time. You could improve upon your weaknesses and protect everyone flawlessly in the next fight. That goal, however lofty, at least felt attainable. In other words, the only thing you needed to be in control of was yourself, and then everything would be fine."
The heir to the Fire Nation spread her arms, gesturing at their surroundings. "But here, you can't delude yourself into believing that. There are too many variables, too many things you can't control. It's not the threat to our lives that troubles you so much, it's just the chaos of it all that you detest. You can't control where a stray boulder might land. Can't control who is standing next to you when they die. You can't control who under your command will falter in a moment of need, or which tunnel collapses when digging toward a wall. Controlling yourself no longer feels like enough, so now you are aware of every bit of chaos out here that is beyond your power to manipulate. The one thing you think you can still control is whether or not we are here at all to be threatened by this chaos, but that assumption is folly. You can dictate what your subordinates do, but not me. You have some say in what might happen, but ultimately, you are master of nothing. Accept that so you can move past this pathetic cycle of internalized fearmongering."
When Azula was finally done, silence fell over the gathered companions. Only the sounds of the war camp in action broke this quiet, though for the four of them, such noises went unnoticed anyway. Azula seemed quite content with her spiel, while Ty Lee and Mai both stood by with bated breath, completely unsure how Xisheng would take it. Neither of them felt like this would really help the situation, but it was hardly like the could do anything about it now.
As for Xisheng, he stood still, his brow furrowed in consternation. Whether he was ruminating on Azula's words or simply thinking of some sort of response, none of the girls could tell. Unfortunately, after a few moments of silent contemplation, the young commander didn't breathe a sigh of relief or evoke some form of acceptance. Instead, he merely glanced around at each of his friends with a resigned look in his eyes. Only then did he open his mouth to speak.
"I...have some matters to attend to. Is there anything else we need to talk about?"
Since it was obvious that he didn't actually want to continue this conversation, none of the girls raised another topic to discuss. Their silence was excuse enough for Xisheng to turn from them and walk away, his plodding stride noticeably slower than normal as he signaled for his guards to fall in around him from their points of observation. Ty Lee watched him go with great distress, but that transformed to ire as soon as she turned her gaze on Azula.
"Azula, what the hell?! He's worried about us getting hurt, and you thought it was a good idea to point all of that crap out? What were you thinking?!"
It was already rare enough for Ty Lee to speak so aggressively, but combined with her hoarse voice, it really didn't sound like her at all. Even so, Azula merely folded her arms as she explained herself without a hint of remorse.
"I'm thinking that I know exactly how he feels. I know full well how frustrating it is to acknowledge that big, important things are completely beyond your control. I also know that there is no pleasantry or platitude that will change that reality. The fact of the matter is, he can either accept this unfortunate truth or spend the rest of his life in fear of the things he cannot change. All anyone can do to get what they want is their best. If he can't be satisfied with that, he's doomed to spiral into a meaningless life of raging against the natural chaos of existence."
Both Ty Lee and Mai leveled surprised expressions at Azula, though it was the latter who commented on her explanation. "How... unusually philosophical of you. Honestly, you always struck me as exactly the type of person to want to control everything, and be upset about anything that fell outside of that purview."
Azula's lips turned up into an amused grin. "Oh, I seek to exert control over everything I possibly can, make no mistake. I like controlling things: it makes me all warm and fuzzy inside. But there's nothing I can do to change whether or not a volcano erupts or a thunderstorm happens. I'll do anything in my power to get what I want, but raging against the the things I can't possibly have any control over is a waste of time and energy. Being in control of your own destiny means choosing how you react to the inevitable obstacles you face, not dictating what happens to you at all."
Honestly, Ty Lee was pretty impressed by this. She wasn't sure if she'd ever seen Azula say something more mature and wise than that. Still, that wasn't really the problem at hand.
"OK, but was now really the best time for a very confrontational philosophy lesson? I really think we'd have been better off trying to reassure Gohan instead of just telling him to accept that his fears are totally justified. Telling scared people that they should be scared is not helpful!"
"The only thing that would have reassured him just now was all of us agreeing to leave this battlefield behind and go somewhere far away where it's safe. I take it neither of you want to do that?"
Azula's two friends exchanged glances with one another, silently confirming that they were on the same page in this regard. Detecting this herself, Azula raised a question to them. "Frankly, I'm a little surprised. Neither of you are scared to be here? Gohan's not exactly wrong about the danger we face. Both life and limb could be lost out here on this battlefield."
Ty Lee hoped that she spoke for both her and Mai when she answered this question. "Of course I'm scared. I don't want to get hurt, or, y'know... but the thought of that happening to my friends is worse. I want to protect Gohan and you guys just like he wants to protect us. Maybe I can't control what happens all the time, but there could be a moment when I'm in a position to protect one of you. Even if it's just one time, that's more than enough reason to risk being here."
Azula wasn't surprised to hear that sort of sentiment from Ty Lee. It was pretty typical of her. She still turned her attention to Mai though, because she was curious to hear her excuse. The obvious scrutiny prompted Mai to muster some sort of response, though she clearly had no intent of getting as sentimental about it as Ty Lee. She did seem a bit flustered, though.
"Tch, it's only you people that spend every waking moment worrying about theoretical problems that haven't happened yet. I'm not lying awake every night worrying about whether or not I'm about to get crushed by a rock. Just fretting that much sounds exhausting. Besides, it took us forever to get here as it is. I'm not interested in taking a trip back to Omashu."
It was obvious to Azula that Mai's answer was simply the sassy bravado of someone who didn't want to admit to having feelings similar to Ty Lee, but she didn't get to call the marksman out on it, since Mai bounced Azula's question back at her.
"What about you? I mean, as far as this fiasco is concerned, you're the only one who has actually had a close call on the battlefield, Azula. Why are you staying?"
Put on the spot, Azula initially raised her own veneer of indifference as an answer. "Why, fame, glory, honor, and the spoils of war, of course. That's all plenty worth a little risk here and there. Although..."
Azula sheepishly glanced off to the side away from her friends. "...I suppose I share sentiments not entirely dissimilar to the two of you."
The sweet implication of those words was not lost on Azula's friends, though neither of them had the chance to grill her for the rare display of emotion, even subdued as it was. That was thanks to the arrival of two Fire Nation soldiers at their patch of dirt, both of whom bowed deeply before one of them explained the reason for their presence.
"Forgive the intrusion, Princess. The Commander has ordered us to provide security for you, if you will permit it."
Though not surprised by the arrival of a security detail in and of itself, Azula cocked an eyebrow at the duo regardless. "He sent two men to guard three people? We don't always stay together."
The masked soldier did not miss a beat in his response. "There are other soldiers observing from a distance, your Highness. The Commander said you would be... displeased to have two squads of guards crowding you and your comrades throughout the day."
Overhearing this, Mai peered around the two soldiers to spy a number of other troops scattered around their immediate vicinity, most of them doing a pretty poor job of looking nonchalant as they obviously overlooked the area she and the others were standing in.
"Oh yeah, being watched by a dozen masked men at every hour of the day will be so much better."
The soldier in question missed her sarcasm completely. "We will be discreet, milady. You won't even know we're there."
With a sigh, Mai bit back an irritable retort and told herself that she just had to let Gohan have this for the time being. That said, she was definitely on board with Azula's direct plan of having him just get over his problem now. Harsh though it may have been, Mai didn't think she could tolerate being watched like this for more than a day. If Gohan didn't chill out by then, well... maybe she'd see what kinds of drugs military medical personnel kept handy.
Again, I apologize for the fact that you're getting a relatively short chapter after such a long wait. But I'm going to aim for shorter chapters like this overall from now on. With how busy and convoluted life is getting right now, on top of the fact that I do want to write original novels too, going for shorter chapters is kind of the only move short of just not writing fanfiction anymore, which I don't want to resort to. Hopefully, shorter chapters will mean more regular update times, and hey: it's news to me, but apparently readers in general actually prefer shorter chapters, so maybe it will all be for the best.
Anyway, thank you for taking the time to read this story, even though it's been updating so inconsistently. You guys really do have impressive patience that I don't deserve.